[SPEAKER_00]: Hey there, welcome to episode 422 of the Find Your Food Voice Podcast.

[SPEAKER_00]: We have Vinnie Wells be answering a letter today for someone who is trying really hard to break free from dieting and diet culture.

[SPEAKER_00]: let's get to it.

[SPEAKER_00]: Welcome Dear Voice Finder to the Finding Food Voice podcast.

[SPEAKER_00]: I am Julie Duffy Dylan, Register Dietitian and your host.

[SPEAKER_00]: Today's episode is a letter episode and if you're new to the podcast, welcome.

[SPEAKER_00]: It's so nice to meet you.

[SPEAKER_00]: A letter episode is my favorite way to connect with you.

[SPEAKER_00]: These are letters that listeners just like you right and they address it to food.

[SPEAKER_00]: And then me and a guest, well, we sort through the letter and hopefully give you some pointers on steps moving ahead.

[SPEAKER_00]: And while this doesn't replace anything that you'd get from an in-person healthcare provider, we hope that the information helps you just to give you some more pointers to maybe bring to that healthcare provider.

[SPEAKER_00]: But also, if you are not the letter writer, you may find yourself really relating to what this letter writer is saying.

[SPEAKER_00]: That alone is worth it all for me because you are not alone in your struggle with your relationship with food, you're not alone on how hard recovery is and I'm excited for you to meet Vinnie Wells be if you've never met them before.

[SPEAKER_00]: I have loved connecting with Vinnie over the years and they were on my podcast at least.

[SPEAKER_00]: Gosh, I had to be six or seven years ago.

[SPEAKER_00]: We'll put a link to the first episode that Vinnie was on in the show notes.

[SPEAKER_00]: But they are someone that I've re so often I hear from people in real life who've connected with them and Vinnie has helped them with their complicated just like surviving diet culture and trying to actually [SPEAKER_00]: And that's what I love so much about this episode is you're going to hear like the logistics, the steps on what it looks like to go from feeling like this really complicated relationship with food to like making the like movements forward and how to continue to have them momentum and not get in that shame spiral.

[SPEAKER_00]: Vinnie has really practical insights that I just love so much.

[SPEAKER_00]: A few of the things that we talk about are how to add something called internal family systems to your process of repairing your relationship with food and also how is diet culture like a call but even worse.

[SPEAKER_00]: It's even harder to get out of and I can't wait for you to hear how many breaks this down.

[SPEAKER_00]: Before we hear this episode's letter and hear from Vinny, I want to share with you that the Find Your Food Voice book is available for purchase.

[SPEAKER_00]: Anywhere books are sold, I wrote this book for you if you have a complicated history of food, whether you have been trying to [SPEAKER_00]: find a new way to eat outside of dieting, whether you are recurring for many units order, or that you've been taught through your family that you have to look a certain way and eat a certain way.

[SPEAKER_00]: Find your food voice is the book to read if you've tried intuitive eating or other non-diet tools and you just need more.

[SPEAKER_00]: You need more support, you need more in-depth ways and strategies tools to help you to just continue on.

[SPEAKER_00]: with this really important work.

[SPEAKER_00]: I always say it's hard work but it's good work and this is really important for you to feel it home in your body and to feel like your relationship with food is actually satisfying and pleasurable and adding health to that you can do those things.

[SPEAKER_00]: Find your food voice is a book again that I wrote for you to help you in this space.

[SPEAKER_00]: You can get to [SPEAKER_00]: be sure to check out my sub-stack.

[SPEAKER_00]: If you're new to Sub-stack, this is basically a place where we can get into the weeds of all the nitty gritty at any topic that you are hoping to talk about.

[SPEAKER_00]: Sub-stack is like blogging in 2025 and I have found a new home there.

[SPEAKER_00]: I'm not on Facebook or Instagram, but I'm on Sub-stack and you can get to it at findyourfoodvoys.sub-stack.com.

[SPEAKER_00]: There you can get free and paid articles, [SPEAKER_00]: that help you to apply the fine your food voice principles with helping you to move away from dieting.

[SPEAKER_00]: If you also struggle with insulin resistance and PCS, that's where I do a lot of that work.

[SPEAKER_00]: You can get to it at fineyourfoodvoice.substack.com.

[SPEAKER_00]: All right, we are going to take a very quick sponsor break.

[SPEAKER_00]: Then you're going to hear the episodes letter and the interview with Vinny Wellsbee.

[SPEAKER_00]: I'm really leaning into this anti-diap thing and healing my relationship with you, but it feels like my world is on fire.

[SPEAKER_00]: I find myself wanting to get through this phase quicker to binge information and learning in order to not have to feel every step on this journey.

[SPEAKER_00]: When I make a choice to indulge in my previous off limits or ashamed versions of you, I feel so much excitement and shame and anxiety.

[SPEAKER_00]: It feels almost too much to manage.

[SPEAKER_00]: Every ounce of growth feels like fighting with a bear.

[SPEAKER_00]: This weekend, I noticed new freedom and boundaries and can feel a little bit of my own food voice, even when triggered while I was out with some friends.

[SPEAKER_00]: And I was proud.

[SPEAKER_00]: But then, for two days, I felt like my mind was dragging me back to the beginning.

[SPEAKER_00]: I could feel every pound, every roll, and ounce of fat, and it felt like my body was screaming that I'm not healthy, and that I'm doing this wrong.

[SPEAKER_00]: I woke up this morning with a cold and was scared of the thought of the doctor's office, and the inevitable scale, because lots of days, I do feel like I'm growing in acceptance of my body.

[SPEAKER_00]: And the last three months, my relationship with you has healed a lot, and I'm seeing so many glimpses of peace and joy, and this excited me.

[SPEAKER_00]: But what if I look down at the scale and all of those feelings go away?

[SPEAKER_00]: I know what you're thinking, just don't look.

[SPEAKER_00]: That only works half the time.

[SPEAKER_00]: I feel like I have worked too hard for this to call crashing down and go back to restrict to you.

[SPEAKER_00]: But I'm exhausted and scared.

[SPEAKER_00]: The food and diet noise on the road recovery feels like kicking a hornets nest and I do not know how to get out.

[SPEAKER_00]: But I keep wondering what people think when they look at me [SPEAKER_00]: I think I am scared of this being just another season of waking up one day and finding out that this too was a phase.

[SPEAKER_00]: A diet of swords or a fast from dieting.

[SPEAKER_00]: And I'm scared that then I will realize that health is no longer attainable because I trusted you too much and now I'm too attached and unwilling or enable to make adjustments for long-term bodily health.

[SPEAKER_00]: I'm ashamed to admit that I'm too scared of gaining more weight and I still secretly hope that healing my relationship with you will help me get smaller.

[SPEAKER_00]: I am scared of what my family thinks and am unsure how to be confident in my new journey with you when it is so counter-cultural.

[SPEAKER_00]: Thanks for listening.

[SPEAKER_00]: I do love you food and I'm so excited to potentially have more peace with you.

[SPEAKER_00]: I just feel estranged.

[SPEAKER_00]: Love a 29 year old OCD slash ADHD brain with 16 years of family diet trauma or a fat woman [SPEAKER_00]: All right, this is our episode's letter and now we're going to head and speak with Vinny Wellesby.

[SPEAKER_00]: Hey there Vinny, how are you?

[SPEAKER_00]: of my drink.

[SPEAKER_01]: I thought we had more than two seconds.

[SPEAKER_01]: Do you want me to say it again or just keep it in this way?

[SPEAKER_00]: No, I'm glad you're a little bit more hydrated than you were three seconds ago.

[SPEAKER_00]: And it's so good to see you.

[SPEAKER_02]: It's been too long to get some liquid into my brain such a struggle.

[SPEAKER_02]: And how long do you think I was on the podcast?

[SPEAKER_02]: Maybe like six years ago?

[SPEAKER_00]: Oh, I'm time ago.

[SPEAKER_00]: It was probably before we knew anything about Corona viruses and stuff like that, you know.

[SPEAKER_02]: Shit, and that was 2019.

[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.

[SPEAKER_00]: I think it was probably 28, 2019 somewhere in there.

[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.

[SPEAKER_02]: Never.

[SPEAKER_02]: Time moved so quickly.

[SPEAKER_02]: Oh my goodness.

[SPEAKER_00]: Well, thank you for having me back.

[SPEAKER_02]: I appreciate it.

[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.

[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.

[SPEAKER_00]: I appreciate you too and I have heard about you over the years since the last time we talked because every once in a while, I would be working with someone who is like, do you know, Fanny and how's that stuff, yes, yes, yes, that they were part of communities you were hosting and things like that and you were bringing so much support.

[SPEAKER_00]: So I'm glad that we have a chance to go through this letter.

[SPEAKER_00]: I know you read through it because you [SPEAKER_00]: I always like to start with like [SPEAKER_00]: What's the big picture?

[SPEAKER_00]: What is this person going through?

[SPEAKER_00]: Like what would you say is like the big thing that this person is struggling with?

[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, I mean, that was so fucking good.

[SPEAKER_02]: So fucking good.

[SPEAKER_02]: It was really good.

[SPEAKER_02]: It sounds like so, there was so much in there that I kind of pulled a couple of threads and it sounds like they're struggling with how [SPEAKER_02]: quickly or slowly the journey is taking and that they're doing it wrong and that it's going to fail they're going to go back to the old way is what I'm hearing.

[SPEAKER_00]: So it feels like I'm fighting so hard, right?

[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, they're working so hard.

[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, they said feels like fighting with a bear.

[SPEAKER_02]: I was like, oh, I wrote that quite down.

[SPEAKER_02]: That's a lot.

[SPEAKER_00]: So I later that one myself.

[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.

[SPEAKER_00]: Any bare reference, you know, it's culturally relevant, but that's a probably an appropriate way to refer to this experience.

[SPEAKER_00]: And yeah, like they have worked so hard, and I get the sense too that like, [SPEAKER_00]: life keeps like life thing.

[SPEAKER_00]: I keep just throwing the same stuff and probably more and heavy headers and more obstacles and so yeah they're afraid of like losing it all.

[SPEAKER_02]: Something I'm thinking about when reading that letter is that I didn't a podcast episode about diet culture, is diet culture a cult?

[SPEAKER_02]: And in our society, if you're in a cult, you leave a cult.

[SPEAKER_02]: People are like, fuck yeah, you left the cult.

[SPEAKER_02]: This is amazing.

[SPEAKER_02]: With diet culture, debates if it's a cult or not.

[SPEAKER_02]: But diet culture, when you leave diet culture, you're not going to get the same reaction.

[SPEAKER_02]: People are going to say, go back into the cult.

[SPEAKER_02]: Go keep doing it, even though it was harming you and all sorts of things.

[SPEAKER_02]: So it makes it really, really difficult to not [SPEAKER_02]: jump back in because everyone's telling you your decision is wrong.

[SPEAKER_02]: Apart from a small minority of people who were saying, maybe this is a different room.

[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, I mean, I think that's part of why like having people who are either going through the same thing, who have been there a little bit longer, fight, who have ditched the call to, you know, have similar like identities, like that's so powerful to help you stay, I don't know, get grounded in what you know to be true, so okay, let's just think about what this letter writer can do.

[SPEAKER_02]: Like what comes to mind for you that this person could do in this place is a fast-off is is is two things knowing the process of learning this the end learning journey and two internal family systems.

[SPEAKER_02]: So, yeah, first the unlearning journey.

[SPEAKER_02]: I've got a post on my Instagram where it goes over the kind of six stages of unlearning, unlearning anti-fat bias and body hate type thing.

[SPEAKER_02]: and diet culture.

[SPEAKER_02]: So most people are at the stage where they believe that dieting is good, fat bodies are bad, and if you are in a bigger body than you are in attractive unhealthy et cetera, et cetera.

[SPEAKER_02]: That's the first stage.

[SPEAKER_02]: Next, something will happen.

[SPEAKER_02]: Next stage number two, there's some sort of catalyst.

[SPEAKER_02]: Maybe you've been dieting for 20 years and finally you're like, [SPEAKER_02]: three, that exploration is happening and you intellectually understand that dieting isn't working for you that you can be fat and healthy or attractive or you know you're unlearning those biases, but you've got some you know a lot of bias around it like [SPEAKER_02]: intellectually you know it, but in your room, no.

[SPEAKER_02]: Number four is people will say, listen, I find, you know, fat people attractive.

[SPEAKER_02]: I am really not into engaging with diet culture, but for me, I know, I [SPEAKER_02]: and unhealthy if I put on weight.

[SPEAKER_02]: I know I should really be watching what I eat.

[SPEAKER_02]: So it's okay for others but not me.

[SPEAKER_02]: The next stage number five begins to appreciate [SPEAKER_02]: their body and accept the changes in their relationship to food, and then number 6 is really embodying the reality that the issue was never to do with your body, but it was to do with power and oppression.

[SPEAKER_02]: So this person it sounds like they're between four, five, six, which [SPEAKER_00]: And no one can take that away, that one can never be erased.

[SPEAKER_00]: No, that's the thing that I hear them being so scared about, like, no one can take that away from you.

[SPEAKER_00]: No matter what diet you go on next, you know, even if that happens, like you can't take away the work you've done.

[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, I don't want to learn that again.

[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[SPEAKER_02]: You can't learn that.

[SPEAKER_02]: It's like, you know, for me, and learning a diet culture and anti-fatnosis is, you know, gambling, the house always wins.

[SPEAKER_02]: You know, you can still sample and, you know, know that the house always wins, but you don't can't unlearn that the house always wins, you always know it's not going to work if you engage in dieting, etc.

[SPEAKER_02]: The other side of things is, um, [SPEAKER_02]: It sounded like a lot of shame was happening and shame and blame.

[SPEAKER_02]: I'm not doing it right, what if I'll fail and what the environment that they're in with with other people.

[SPEAKER_02]: A lot of shame is happening and so offering self compassion and thinking about that.

[SPEAKER_02]: They said, feels like fighting with a bear.

[SPEAKER_02]: Thinking about that bear, internal family systems is a framework that people use in therapy, but you can there's a book on it.

[SPEAKER_02]: no bad parts.

[SPEAKER_02]: So my bookshelf was like, no bad parts.

[SPEAKER_02]: So if I can good, the in case people are familiar with it, the idea is that in our brains, they're all these different parts of us, none of them are good or bad, they're just who you are and you might need to tend to them because now you're an adult, you're the like the highest version of yourself and that part that's saying, oh my god, what if and that [SPEAKER_02]: kind of hangover from eating food and then feeling guilt, is that potentially younger version of ourselves who's so fucking scared, who sees you doing things that's outside of their zone of comfort and is doing everything in their power to [SPEAKER_02]: alert you to the fact that you're in danger, that you're going to be judged, etc.

[SPEAKER_02]: And now as an adult, you can look to that young child version of you.

[SPEAKER_02]: And instead of saying like fuck you, shut up, whatever, what would you do to that younger version of you?

[SPEAKER_02]: You would say, oh my goodness, I understand it's so much that you're really worried that we are, you know, whatever it is that you're worrying about.

[SPEAKER_02]: But don't worry, I got this.

[SPEAKER_02]: Come on, take my hand.

[SPEAKER_02]: I'll show you this.

[SPEAKER_02]: And it's just compassion versus shaming yourself and I find that personally my own life to be so powerful because whenever I have these thoughts come up, I'm just like, thank you, brain.

[SPEAKER_02]: I get it, I listen, I understand what you're saying and don't worry, I'm driving the bus, you can sit down, but you see put on and relax, I've got this and I love you.

[SPEAKER_00]: Yes, in my parts work that I've been doing with my individual therapists in this past year, I find myself doing a lot of like, if you're not watching on YouTube, you can't see this, but my therapist taught me just to like, bring them in, just bring them in, like, just give my hug, you know, because that process of like acknowledging this part with all this information [SPEAKER_00]: we don't need that kind of warning system because we were driving the bus, you know?

[SPEAKER_00]: But like that arguing and the shaming of it?

[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, just pushes it further away.

[SPEAKER_00]: But so just, you know, come here.

[SPEAKER_00]: Let me just give you a hug.

[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, me, me, me, me.

[SPEAKER_00]: If you see me walking down the street and I'm doing this, I just want to do my parts work.

[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.

[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.

[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.

[SPEAKER_02]: What I think is about that part is because they're a young person and it could be a different for everyone.

[SPEAKER_02]: This is one of the first [SPEAKER_02]: the young, they don't have the emotional capacity to understand that eating food is probably not going to mean that you're going to put on 75,000 pounds in three seconds, and even if you did put on 75 pounds in three seconds, can you survive that, can you thrive for the bigger body, etc.

[SPEAKER_02]: That new ones, they're not able to do that.

[SPEAKER_02]: And then if we're getting in an argument [SPEAKER_02]: We are not talking to them in a way that they can learn and understand and feel safe.

[SPEAKER_02]: They're not going to feel safe.

[SPEAKER_02]: So helping them feel safe and sit down is the idea.

[SPEAKER_02]: Which can be difficult to recognise that voice is present.

[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.

[SPEAKER_00]: And I think that I'm appreciating hearing what you're saying is like a big part of this is, [SPEAKER_00]: because this person is doing a ton of work.

[SPEAKER_00]: Like this letter alone, I was like, this person's doing a ton of work.

[SPEAKER_00]: Like this is hardship that they have been unpacking for a while now, and that's very impressive.

[SPEAKER_00]: And as they're acknowledging all these different pieces to be bring compassion forward instead of like, let me just try to ignore it, let me shame it or blame it away.

[SPEAKER_00]: The other thing that I'm so glad you brought up the family systems, cause I wasn't reading it through that lens at all.

[SPEAKER_00]: now my brain is going in those directions.

[SPEAKER_00]: So something that really spoke to me in this letter was the fear of losing it all.

[SPEAKER_00]: And I think I brought that up at the beginning.

[SPEAKER_00]: There's this and I can't see exactly where it is.

[SPEAKER_00]: But they're mentioning something about doing all this work and then just so scared.

[SPEAKER_00]: Oh yeah, I think I'm most scared of this being just another season of [SPEAKER_00]: And I'm now looking at through a family system lens, I'm thinking about that part that was thought dieting was the only way.

[SPEAKER_00]: That wasn't didn't have that any other option yet.

[SPEAKER_00]: And maybe that's the part that's coming through in some of this letter that and that's again to say to you letter writer like you've done so much work no one can take that away from you you're you're learning is there and there seems to be I don't know if you see this too but like there seems to be almost like this point of return that I see some people experiencing and there.

[SPEAKER_00]: they're moving away from dieting or like they just like learn too much and they see too much and they feel too much that like they may like relapse or whatever word you want to use but like there's just like a point of no return like it's just not going to go to the same place ever again because especially when you do start to see the oppressive systems as a part of it it's just it just could you can only go so far before you're like oh wait no this is not yeah [SPEAKER_02]: You might have heartedly do a hard work.

[SPEAKER_02]: Yes, and then you're like, oh, yeah, this is snow.

[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[SPEAKER_02]: And the other thing that I thought when reading this is that, um, like I mentioned about the cult thing, um, but the difference between my life when I first came out of diet culture versus now, [SPEAKER_02]: I'm not sure that I would be able to survive as effectively in the life I had when I had just left diaculture because I was surrounded by people who were like, oh my god, how many calories is in that packet of ketchup or you know, I didn't have any fat friends, I didn't have it, I didn't know anyone that was doing this.

[SPEAKER_02]: I was just in the waters of anti-fatness and diaculture now, it's totally the opposite.

[SPEAKER_02]: And that's not going to change overnight.

[SPEAKER_02]: It's like a slow shift in a way to liberation away from oppression and just being one study has shown that just being in the quote fat group.

[SPEAKER_02]: the in-group of fat people, the fat society, fat culture, just being in that group, surrounded by other people, not saying that this person is fat, but you can do it with diets, but it helps protect you from anti-fat bias, external and internal.

[SPEAKER_02]: And so being in community, whether it's a Facebook group, following people on Instagram, whatever, or in person, [SPEAKER_02]: Just that act is going to help you survive, anti-fatness and diaculture when it comes up.

[SPEAKER_02]: And this person is already probably doing a lot.

[SPEAKER_02]: The other thing of it, of the side of it, is I have another post on my Instagram, which talks about how to protect yourself, remove, reduce, [SPEAKER_02]: and protect.

[SPEAKER_02]: So that stage in my life, it wasn't possible for me to say to all my friends, you're dead to me now because you took about the camera to catch up.

[SPEAKER_02]: That's just, that's how I worked most of the time, right?

[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.

[SPEAKER_02]: And so removing if possible, [SPEAKER_02]: the amount of time that you spend talking about diets or watching that TV show, bikini, babes, dating, showing, instead of watching 10 hours, watching 8 hours.

[SPEAKER_02]: If you can remove people, your things.

[SPEAKER_02]: And that feels good for you then do it.

[SPEAKER_02]: If not that reduction can be really helpful and if you can't reduce it Say for example your boss is always like, oh my god, you know, diet's love whatever Protecting yourself and so that looks like you know, maybe listening to your podcast Going on Instagram and finding those those fat people that you love and that type of Support of meeting yourself where you're at right now is can be really helpful [SPEAKER_00]: Hmm, so when they're in that space of fear and you know, you mentioned the stages.

[SPEAKER_00]: And this person is probably in the four or five six zone or like in the four to five trying to make the six zone yeah maybe sometimes six and yeah yeah yeah kind of it's probably a blurry thing but that there's something you may be able to reduce and then maybe times where you have to add like that's what I'm hearing you say from all that like yeah and hearing that I'm like there's so much gray in this and what we know about oppressive systems is they love the black and white.

[SPEAKER_00]: They'd like to have the all or nothing mean tidy and that's that's bullshit like that's the trap because that doesn't exist none of us not there no matter what we do and so it'll always feel like we're failing so if we think that's the only way to know we're doing it right well that doesn't exist so like the way you describe that I feel like it makes it accessible and I have a feeling that a writer you're probably.

[SPEAKER_00]: doing a lot of that.

[SPEAKER_00]: So like, what if you are doing, you're further along than you're giving yourself like acknowledging, you know, I think so.

[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, because if we think about people at the first stage, that yeah, which is where most people are, is that they like diets are good and fat people are not so great.

[SPEAKER_02]: they've already done so much work to get out of that.

[SPEAKER_02]: And the other thing that I thought that was important was something I talk about is unpacking your suitcase and so I like to visualize beliefs as suitcase is and if we open them that's where we've collected all the evidence and so you can pick up a pair of socks and it'll be like there's that time that my mum told me that I was ugly because my body was big or whatever.

[SPEAKER_02]: lots of evidence and so we have lots of evidence that dieting is good, fat is bad.

[SPEAKER_02]: And from time to time, those pieces of evidence in that suitcase will slip out and we'll pop into our brain.

[SPEAKER_02]: And instead of thinking, oh my god, it's so annoying that I can't stop thinking, [SPEAKER_02]: wish I could be thin, which is one thing that they also said.

[SPEAKER_02]: I secretly wish I could be a smaller, so many people.

[SPEAKER_02]: I've got that exact same.

[SPEAKER_02]: But what if my body is a one that happens to go become thin from an intuitive eating.

[SPEAKER_02]: It could happen.

[SPEAKER_02]: Hopefully it's me.

[SPEAKER_02]: Anyway, and so if those thoughts come up, [SPEAKER_02]: grab them and thank them because that is evidence.

[SPEAKER_02]: That is that's something that you can explore.

[SPEAKER_02]: Your brain is letting you open that suitcase and see what's inside.

[SPEAKER_02]: And when we know what's inside, we can lift up that parasolks, give it a smell.

[SPEAKER_02]: And we're like, oh God, that's old, chuck it away.

[SPEAKER_02]: You know?

[SPEAKER_02]: So I think I think he sucks.

[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.

[SPEAKER_02]: And he doesn't think he sucks in there.

[SPEAKER_02]: And then you can do things to fill up the other suitcase that says it's okay to not die or it's okay to be fat, whatever.

[SPEAKER_02]: So instead of, again, shaming yourself or when those thoughts come up, just, you know, thank your brain for supplying you with the evidence of where you could next focus when you're in your next stage of the journey.

[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.

[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, I know this is the work.

[SPEAKER_00]: It also sounds so exhausting.

[SPEAKER_00]: Is there anything that you encourage folks to do to like, just keep going?

[SPEAKER_00]: Cause yeah, that sounds like a lot of like mental, like, uh, just, I don't know, like it's, it's just, there's a lot of, especially in certain phases where it's going to be a lot of like taking in different messages.

[SPEAKER_02]: Mm-hmm.

[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[SPEAKER_02]: I think one thing that people forget is that this person, I think they said something like a couple of decades, they've been dieting.

[SPEAKER_02]: Many of us have been have been living our whole lives in a society that values thin bodies.

[SPEAKER_02]: So, and I think they said that they've been doing this for three months.

[SPEAKER_02]: three months will not erase decades.

[SPEAKER_02]: It's not going to take decades, though, to, you know, and learn that stuff, but we have to break it down and not look at the whole thing.

[SPEAKER_02]: Like if you were to climb, yes, Philiman Jaro.

[SPEAKER_02]: you're not going to be like getting to base camp one and then looking at the top and being like for fucks sake why am I not either top yet?

[SPEAKER_02]: I think my name is I'm a piece of shit.

[SPEAKER_02]: You're going to hopefully say yes I made it to base camp one of our good brothers and then tomorrow think about base camp [SPEAKER_02]: So taking stock in what you've already achieved and know that, you know, getting to the amount up to the top of the mat is going to be hard, but if we take it one step at a time, we can do it.

[SPEAKER_02]: So, and way to that, you can measure that is through setting goals, setting smart goals, and so, because a lot of this, this is very, you know, we can't touch it, we don't know to how to measure how much work we've done.

[SPEAKER_02]: But if there are things in that your life that you want to do or not doing because of the way that you feel about your body or around food, setting yourself really do a ball, but still a little bit challenging goals.

[SPEAKER_02]: and seeing if you can work towards achieving them and not goals like I want to love my body because that's not a smart goal.

[SPEAKER_02]: A goal could be I want to wear a bathing suit with a cover-up at the beach for three minutes with my kids.

[SPEAKER_02]: Literally like that and then if you achieve it [SPEAKER_00]: So break it down so much.

[SPEAKER_00]: Instead of like the again, the all or nothing thing, I think there's like parts to making it smaller.

[SPEAKER_00]: And I hear so much of like harm reductive kind of like terminology too that we're talking about that again, I think is important that is not usually offered in the medical model.

[SPEAKER_00]: or especially with dye culture, you know, yeah, excuse me, so I appreciate that.

[SPEAKER_00]: Before we move on, away from the letter.

[SPEAKER_00]: Is there anything else you want to mention about the letter?

[SPEAKER_02]: Just that I just want to give this button a huge hug and a huge high five and just like, you fucking got it.

[SPEAKER_02]: You're going to do it.

[SPEAKER_02]: You're doing everything right.

[SPEAKER_00]: I want to know about what you're working on these days, because it has been so long.

[SPEAKER_00]: Is there anything that's like in your wheelhouse or like in your neck of the woods that you're working on?

[SPEAKER_00]: That's like, you want to tell the audience about?

[SPEAKER_02]: Oh yeah, so a couple of things.

[SPEAKER_02]: So I've got first fatty, which is helping individuals, but I also have now white and crisp and salty, which is where I go in and train organizations.

[SPEAKER_02]: And so if you want a part of, it could be a part of the diversity world, or like if you work in healthcare, whatever, if you want someone like me to come in, I do that type of stuff.

[SPEAKER_02]: Also, I've done a couple of surveys.

[SPEAKER_02]: which were pretty cool, which one talked about fat at work, and the other is fat in healthcare, where I've surveyed hundreds of fat people.

[SPEAKER_02]: We've got stats, and we've got stories, and they are pretty awful, as you can imagine.

[SPEAKER_02]: And so both of those reports you can get for free, and they are [SPEAKER_02]: I'm sure they are.

[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah so you can go check those out.

[SPEAKER_02]: If you'd like some stats and information on what it's like being a fat person in the world.

[SPEAKER_02]: TLDR on it is pretty shit but also there's hope that [SPEAKER_02]: Many health care providers and some workplaces are now finally on board.

[SPEAKER_02]: There's been a huge shift in the last five years of how we think about this stuff and you've probably seen it, Julie, in the difference in things through, you know, I've been doing this work for 12 years.

[SPEAKER_02]: The difference between the way that we view dieting and bodies is just so different.

[SPEAKER_02]: now from this.

[SPEAKER_00]: Especially from a clinical kind of perspective because I think like culturally we kind of like a step forward step back so like I sometimes there's like especially in the U.S.

[SPEAKER_00]: where I am you know but 15 years ago I started working with a new [SPEAKER_00]: professor at a college near me who does like the last part of training for dietitians.

[SPEAKER_00]: We do like a year internship and so I had been coming to them for a while in teaching a class, but she's like, no, I want to redo the internship to make it only waiting inclusive.

[SPEAKER_00]: This is 15 years ago.

[SPEAKER_00]: Yes.

[SPEAKER_00]: What?

[SPEAKER_00]: And so it took time though.

[SPEAKER_00]: I didn't just overnight, right?

[SPEAKER_00]: And so I just spoke to the [SPEAKER_00]: You know, 15 years ago, no one knew about waiting inclusive care and tutive eating.

[SPEAKER_00]: Maybe one student who went through like eating to sort of treatment would know about it.

[SPEAKER_00]: But it wasn't the norm.

[SPEAKER_00]: So now, by the time people come into the internship now, everyone knows what it is.

[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, I mean, so like right there, it's already easier for like clinicians to get it, because then we can get to the meat of it.

[SPEAKER_00]: It's okay, let's say.

[SPEAKER_00]: Instead of like convincing or like informing that this exists, [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.

[SPEAKER_00]: And they have questions.

[SPEAKER_00]: So like, but wait, how do I don't like, oh, these are good questions.

[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.

[SPEAKER_00]: Like, what do we actually do when, you know, people come in, they're worried about our health, but they're a weight and blah, blah, you know, like, and so we can get right into it.

[SPEAKER_00]: And so yeah, like things are moving forward.

[SPEAKER_00]: So your work.

[SPEAKER_00]: Yes.

[SPEAKER_00]: I love it.

[SPEAKER_00]: That's also great.

[SPEAKER_00]: Well, I really think there's lots of people with the university system that have done amazing things to like and put things and take in risks to like Bring people like me and just to say some of those things so yeah, so I appreciate them, but yeah, it's nice to see nice to see change [SPEAKER_00]: And you later, we'll see the change, too.

[SPEAKER_00]: Oh, yeah, yeah, it's letter, I will see the change, too.

[SPEAKER_02]: No, right, in ten seconds, I'm going to be like, oh my god, oh, this is what I saw.

[SPEAKER_00]: Oh, look at me, look at me, look at that little bead for vlogger go.

[SPEAKER_00]: Who was right, I don't be little and like a, it's all too great.

[SPEAKER_00]: But just like a younger version of me who hadn't seen the whole thing yet.

[SPEAKER_00]: But now, yeah, they're gonna look back and be like, wow, I've come far and I already was so brave.

[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, that's the point of this letter so much for me.

[SPEAKER_00]: It was like, this person is so brave.

[SPEAKER_00]: They're doing the hard things, like, keep going.

[SPEAKER_00]: And anyway, we gotta go, but it was so nice to chat with you.

[SPEAKER_00]: Thank you for coming on.

[SPEAKER_00]: If we're put all the links in the show notes, but like, someone listening's driving the car, they can't write right now, where can they find you?

[SPEAKER_02]: Fair, it's fatty.

[SPEAKER_00]: You can vomit everywhere on them.

[SPEAKER_00]: Okay, love it.

[SPEAKER_00]: Thanks for making it easy for us.

[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.

[SPEAKER_00]: You're welcome.

[SPEAKER_00]: Thank you so much.

[SPEAKER_00]: Bye.

[SPEAKER_00]: So there you have it.

[SPEAKER_00]: I hope you enjoyed my conversation with Vinnie Wellespie, and thank you so much, Leder Raider, for submitting this letter and listener, do you have a dear food letter within you that just needs to come out?

[SPEAKER_00]: I would love to share it on an episode, head over to my website.

[SPEAKER_00]: It's JulieDuffieDillin.com.

[SPEAKER_00]: Go to the contact section, and that's where you can submit a letter.

[SPEAKER_00]: I'm looking forward to hanging out with you in October.

[SPEAKER_00]: It's the end of September as you're listening to this and I'm looking at my spreadsheet here and what's coming up next in the Find Your Food Voice podcast.

[SPEAKER_00]: We have a great discussion with Dr.

Jen Huber.

[SPEAKER_00]: She is someone who has an expertise in midlife and menopause and also we are going to be hearing an interview with Bonnie Rooney from the Diet Culture Rebel podcast and of course I'm sure there's going to be a chat with my team in there and a nottober in sub-stack I'm going to be sharing with you this really intense research deep dive that I'm doing right now the whole month of September [SPEAKER_00]: on PCOS and GLP ones.

[SPEAKER_00]: I'm going to be sharing with you the research that learned so far, things I'm here on on the street, putting it all together and a handy document, and that is just for paid subscribers.

[SPEAKER_00]: And I hope you can check it out.

[SPEAKER_00]: So you can get to my sub-sac where I have free and paid post on there.

[SPEAKER_00]: You can get to it at findyourfoodvoice.sub-sac.com.

[SPEAKER_00]: All right, that's enough for me today.

[SPEAKER_00]: I look forward to being in your ears in two weeks with another episode of Find Your Food Voice.

[SPEAKER_00]: Until then, take care.