Today I am going to talk about the dark side of spirituality.

As you awaken, as you step more into your light, as you expand your consciousness, you're not just creating more abundance, drawing in the right people who are aligned at a soul level and creating beautiful expansion.

There is also a sense of destruction, a sense of crumbling that takes place, A dark side where we have to face ourselves like never before.

Most people never touch this aspect, or they don't go all the way.

But going all the way, facing this dark night of the soul fully is what changes everything.

It's the difference between partly embodying your truth when it's comfortable and convenient, embodying your light.

And feeling your deepest spiritual nature, or going all the way, opening your heart fully, embodying your deeper nature fully.

It is the difference between the one whose life transforms in every way, and the one who still finds themselves in loops.

Welcome to the Masculine and Feminine Dynamics podcast.

My name is Lorin Krenn and I'm a coach, author, and hypnotherapist.

I help you to understand masculine and feminine dynamics.

Let's dive in.

Spiritual work feels amazing.

At first, you open your heart, life begins to flow, abundance, alignment, the right people, the right moment, everything starts to show up.

But as your light expands, so does the shadow, not your own shadow.

But the shadow in others.

A fundamental truth of awakening is that the more light you embody, the more threatened others feel.

The more hostile their shadow becomes, the more they try to control.

At a certain step or level.

In your evolution, people around you have two choices.

Number one is to step up with you, or number two is to hide behind their shadow.

But there is no longer an in-between.

Even though that in between feels comfortable, it is a sense of comfort zone that we all create because of our identity that when others get uncomfortable, when others get triggered by our light, then we self abandon.

And as you awaken, you shed all that is not true.

So you shed an identity where you are playing safe, an identity where you are bending, an identity, where you are not making others feel uncomfortable.

You, you shrink a little bit in this moment.

And most people do it.

Even people who do deep spiritual work, they shrink, they start to play small in these moments.

And when you catch yourself in these moments and when, when you make that decision inside where you say, I'm no longer going to feed that identity, which is not who I truly am, something fundamentally starts to shift.

It's an incredibly powerful feeling when the right people rise with you, when they can see your light, when they're transformed by your truth and by the medicine of your authenticity.

But remember, there is also a sense of validation that the ego gets from this, because if I grow spiritually and everyone loves me and everyone approves of me, then my ego is getting a lot of fuel here.

But if I grow spiritually and people get really uncomfortable and people make me aware that I am no longer playing a controllable part of their limited reality, and now they feel threatened, there's no validation in that.

In fact, when you experience this, the only thing you can rely on is to validate yourself or even deeper to source your sense of self from something deeper than how others respond.

I like to say to not judge your truth based on how others respond, but to judge it based on how it makes you feel within.

There is that moment of speaking your truth, where you feel a deep sense of power, but then people don't respond in the way you want them to, and that power can vanish and you start bending, you start compromising, you start shrinking and playing small, and that's the identity you break, you release as you awaken.

And as you do that, you have to face yourself in ways as never before because you start to realize how much you still needed validation on this spiritual journey, how much was perhaps still tied onto getting a clap and getting people to tell you how amazing you are, rather than truly devoting yourself to something higher and to something deeper than others.

Perceiving you a certain way.

When you become fully yourself, your light exposes what others have buried, and instead of being inspired by you, they fall deeper into darkness, because it is the protective mechanism that unfolds because their entire reality and who they are is now threatened by you simply no longer playing the part that most people play, which is to play small, to abandon themselves, to shrink, but to stay rooted in your light, even when you can feel the intensity of discomfort that might arise.

And when I say these two is your medicine, usually the, we don't feel it 'cause it feels really uncomfortable.

But what you are really feeling is how their shadow is taking over.

Their shadow then tries to control you, spin stories are about you even turn against you because your presence challenges how they live, it shatters their illusions.

It reveals their unconsciousness with crystal clarity.

And this is when spirituality stops being easy, because it's easy to meditate, it's easy to do spiritual work in peace, but to embody spirituality in the fire, when you are the black sheep in the family, the outsider, as an example, or when a relationship is no longer in alignment, someone is taking advantage of you.

Someone is draining your energy, and you have to put your boundaries.

You have to say no, specifically someone you care about, that's where the real or the deepest spiritual initiation lives and unfolds.

And our mind will scream.

It's unfair.

It longs for a sense of unity, for love, for beauty, because I'm doing all these things for more love and more beauty and more alignment, bec, why do I have to face more darkness?

Why does my medicine create pain for others?

Why does being me fully and authentically cause discomfort?

It feels right in my soul.

Is there something wrong with me?

No, there's nothing wrong with you.

It's just you've become too powerful.

Too powerful for unconscious systems, too powerful for toxic dynamics.

These dynamics thrive only on people who hide, people who hide in identities of self abandonment, of manipulation, guilt tripping, control, whatever it is.

And now these systems and these realities and generational curses, they're threatened because you are a walking threat, a living and breathing threat that illuminates their darkness, that illuminates their unconsciousness, and that they disconnect between the systems and dynamics and who we are truly meant to be, the spirit and divine within us.

So you expand your consciousness and on one hand you're experiencing amazing things, but also you're facing painful emotions.

And there is a chain of events that you have no control over.

But don't people tell us that when you expand, you control everything?

No.

When your light starts to shine so brightly, you will set off a chain of events that are beyond your control.

Some of these things they will unfold are amazing and they open your heart.

Some will get you to your knees because here you are having wonderful intentions and yet the world is responding with hostility.

So what do you do?

Most people, they shrink, they play small, they only embody their light when it's comfortable.

But then there's a second type of people who then go to an extreme.

They only focus on this and get stuck in it.

The only focus on people don't see me and people don't love me, and people can't see my heart, and I'm misunderstood and I'm always lonely, and then there is so much focus on that, that that becomes your reality.

But this is not why you're doing the work.

You're doing the work to always stand in your light.

To always live with an open heart, not just when it's comfortable or convenient or at times.

And for this to happen, the universe will put you through a dark night of the soul.

And it's not just one, and then you're perfectly enlightened, or at least not in most cases, there are many.

Each time when I thought I got it.

I usually experienced one of them, which made me more humble, and I'm still, I still have a lot to learn.

You see, this is the initiation we all need, but no one wants because it's so uncomfortable.

It's like the universe pressing against your heart and soul and saying I see you, you're awakening, you're healing.

You're doing the work, but it's time for you to no longer do this partly.

It's not a part-time job.

It's a full-time job, and it's not a job, it's who you are.

So it's time for you to become fully who you are.

Stop shrinking on that phone call with that one family member.

Stop shrinking.

In your relationship, out of fear of being abandoned.

Stop shrinking of because of X, Y, Z, and stay rooted in your light and your truth and your divinity no matter what.

That is the dark night of the soul.

That is where your mind screams injustice, unfair, it shouldn't be this way, and you come to a conclusion.

While it is or feels incredibly unfair, your disappointment in it will not change anything.

What you do with that raw mess of life and truth is up to you.

And that's the difference between the one who thrives and the one who, who suffers on this journey, or suffers unnecessarily.

Let's put it that way, because not all suffering is self-made.

The one who thrives says I don't have control over this, at least not entirely.

So instead of trying to control and change people's perceptions and always feel disappointed when this happens, let me just face this pain that I call injustice, and it shouldn't be this way.

Let me face it fully.

Let me turn away from the world and the projections and let me go so deep inside that something has to shift.

And that is when everything starts to shift.

You stop pointing the finger, this system, this person, this dynamic, how hard the journey is, and you sit in the silence of your own heart and soul and surrender your story and your ideas of how this journey has to unfold.

You allow the journey to be the way it is, and when you allow the journey to be the way it is, you find a quiet power within the surrender.

A quiet power that does not feel disappointed by life, but instead finds a way to still see beauty, to still remain connected to love, and to still be in touch with divinity, even if you are faced with the hostility and aggression of the shadow and ego of others.

The universe asks you the question again and again.

Are you truly ready to stay in your light?

Not when it's comfortable, but no matter what.

Are you ready to embody spirituality in every part of your life?

To become a teacher, not by preaching, but by keeping your heart open and facing everything?

This is the dark side of spirituality, the pressure, the intensity, the burning away of anything false, including our stories of how life and ideas of how this journey should unfold.

And the voice of the divine saying to us, will you surrender everything to this path?

Because if you resist, if you fight, if you try to control or see it as unjust, you're not fully trusting.

A part of you still believes it knows better, and that's where the suffering of the spiritual journey sneaks in.

You might want to write this down because it's that important.

Let it land again.

The part inside you that is disappointed, that doesn't want to face this darkness, that that says it shouldn't be that way.

It's the part that still thinks it knows better.

It's the part that still says, no, no, it shouldn't be this way.

But how can that be true if it is that way?

If it is that way, then there is a higher in divine intelligence behind it and the reason for it.

So why would we and decide no, it shouldn't be?

That's our limited self.

That is the illusion of spirituality and most people are still there.

And I'm not saying it's one place of judgment.

I used to be there, but I've had the privilege of being cracked open again and again and again until I could no longer be there.

Let's put it that way.

The universe decided that for me, there's my destiny.

There is no escape.

There is no hiding and avoiding, because that's not my path.

The only thing you truly have control over is your surrender, your willingness to walk the higher path, to live and speak your truth no matter what, to embody your light in each moment no matter what is required of you.

Most people do the spiritual work, but they're still hiding.

The deepest seekers all walk through this.

They have faced the injustice, but stop pointing the finger and instead surrendered their need for the journey to be any way different than the way it is, and become friends with that darkness.

Not friends with the shadow of others, but friends with the pain of injustice.

The intensity and brutality and even violence on an energetic level of this journey at times.

And also remember, destruction often, comes before creation.

And what falls was never grounded in truth anyway.

It was always hanging by a thread, so anything that falls apart was already hanging by a thread.

And the only thing that changed it is your expansion and your light, which just burned away that little loose thread.

Let's reflect where in your life are you still hiding?

In a family dynamic, in a relationship, in a friendship?

Where are you being called to trust more and to surrender and give your heart and soul fully to the divine, to this deep journey?

Where are you being asked to embody your light more completely?

Where are you still shrinking and playing small?

Where are you hiding still behind an identity that is false, that is not rooted in truth, that is hanging by a loose thread?

Because on the other side of this path, through the projections, the rejection, the pain lies your deepest power.

And what is that quiet power that you find as you clean up every area in your life energetically, where you are still hiding and playing small, and you embody your light fully and completely?

It is real spirituality.

And what is real spirituality?

It is a spirituality that no longer judges that no longer controls, one that's not rooted in ego or in shadow, but rooted in truth.

One where your heart stays open no matter what.

One, where the darkness of the world can no longer bring you to your knees, not because it's not painful.

Not because it doesn't feel unjust, not because it is somehow magically easy now, but because you have surrendered all of you to the highest path.

Even that last part that still tried to control the journey, that still wanted it all to be a certain way.

And the great paradox of life is that in that you find the love, you find an energy that is so much more beautiful than the word beauty could ever describe You find yourself, your true self.

Thank you for listening to this episode.

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