
ยทS4 E8
S4/E8 | Care
Episode Transcript
Thirteen Days of Halloween Penance, a co production of iHeart three D Audio Blumhouse Television and Grim and Mild from Aaron Nankey.
Headphones recommended, Listener discretion advised.
Speaker 2What is there to say about prison life that hasn't been said a million times before?
It is so boring.
Speaker 3Likes up on your feet, the same shit every.
Speaker 4Day you again, move along.
Speaker 3I imagine some people thrive on that routine.
Speaker 4Checkmate.
Speaker 1Not if I move here, checkmate, still.
Speaker 3Know and that it beats down those who fight back.
Speaker 5Checkmate.
Speaker 6No, that's oh darn.
Speaker 3They say.
Speaker 2The pen gets everyone eventually, either by force or attrition.
Speaker 3What's nuke all?
My question is what are they after?
Speaker 1It's your turn to share today, sireen.
Speaker 3But I don't have anything to say.
Speaker 5How does that make you feel?
Speaker 2If they can keep us physically detained, I'm going if they have ways to enter our minds.
Speaker 7Any side effects from the medication.
Speaker 3Makes me sick to my stomach.
Maybe time to up your dosage.
What's left but the soul?
Speaker 7Take and receive all my liberty, my memory, my understanding, and my entire will.
All I have and all my own You have given all to me.
Speaker 2I swear no matter what, I refuse to submit choice.
Speaker 3But I also wonder how long can I hold out?
Speaker 2Already I'm starting to lose track of time, Identical days turning into identical weeks, filling identical months against a clock and calendar that I have no reason to trust.
I wonder what is all this time doing to me?
How is it changing me?
Speaker 5Has something changed about you?
Speaker 3Well, I've practically quit smoking.
Speaker 5Good for you.
Speaker 2I've started going to church at least more regularly.
I noticed, and well, I was just so angry when I got here.
I'm still angry, furious.
Actually, if I could, I'd trample those guards, break straight through the wall, burn this whole place of the ground, and never look back.
Speaker 5But something's changed.
Speaker 2Well, that kind of rage was hurting more than it was helping me specifically, And if the anger isn't gone, maybe it's a little more contained.
Speaker 7If you were to give it a word, would it be fair to say patience?
Speaker 3I hate to think that I'm just waiting around.
That makes me feel so weak.
Speaker 7I would say it demonstrates tremendous strength.
Whoever is patient has great understanding, But one who is quick tempered displays folly.
Speaker 2But understanding about what how to marchin a line, what not to eat in the cafeteria, who to avoid contact with if you don't want a knight stick to the gut.
Speaker 7Maybe a more personal understanding.
Humans have an innate desire for control over their own lives.
It's a fallacy, really, but even the sense of control can be powerful.
The freedom to make your own choices, to set your own goals can come to define your very identity.
So what happens when that illusion of control vanishes?
Speaker 3You lose your mind or you grow Ah crap, do you know what time it is?
Speaker 5About twelve thirty?
Speaker 3I think, well, I gotta get to the rec center.
Speaker 5Exercise can be good for the soul.
Speaker 3Well maybe it's just uh, I'm supposed to.
Speaker 7Meet someone, meet someone.
Speaker 2Yeah, well, don't keep them waiting.
Speaker 3Thank you, chaplain.
Speaker 5I hope to see you tomorrow.
Speaker 3Why what's tomorrow?
Speaker 5Christmas?
Eve?
Speaker 2Oh?
Speaker 3Snap, I gotta find a gift.
Okay.
Speaker 2Leaving the chapel means libraries on my left, TV rooms.
Speaker 6On my room.
Speaker 3Here's a weight room, the art room.
I just need to go down these stairs.
Rodriguez, I'm never gonna get used to that.
Speaker 4What do you think you're doing?
Speaker 3Uh, recreation, not like that.
You're not, but I'm sure this is the right door.
That hair, my hair.
What's the last time you had a cut.
Hmmm, well I came in before Easter.
Speaker 4Weekend, so right, Captain has strict policies.
Speaker 3Mm okay, I'll get right on that.
Speaker 4Now with me, let go, I said I could walk, Lorena, you got space for one more.
This one here has never seen a brush in your life.
Speaker 3Oh, I'm sorry, didn't know.
I was here to impress.
Speaker 4Your hair is like a nest birds or spiders.
I'm afraid to look.
Speaker 3Then don't go.
Go.
Speaker 4I'll take care of this one.
Don't be afraid to use a little force.
Speaker 3Maybe I do need a trim.
Speaker 4No, you needed a trim three months ago.
Now, Mirena, what you need is a miracle good thing.
I'm mean.
Come, I wash first, then we gleam.
So what's your style?
Are you more a pixie cot or maybe a little framing?
Give some shape to that pretty face.
Speaker 3No, you're not listening.
I don't want you to do anything, just a trem.
Speaker 4Oh, but indulge me.
There must be something you want.
Come on, you can tell me.
Speaker 3Don't fight it.
Speaker 4She'll get it at it you always does do.
Speaker 3What I wanted before I did.
Speaker 4She's always right.
By the time I'm done, I'll have you a feeling all new.
Speaker 3Look.
It's nothing personal.
I just don't spend a lot of time thinking about how I look.
Speaker 4Oh, Jerre one of those?
Speaker 3Aren't you one of those?
Speaker 4Here?
Sit lean back?
Speaker 3What is that supposed to mean?
Speaker 4I'll change you if you sit, Let me guess you'll turn away makeup and hair styling.
And she close, saying you're not into fashion?
But nonina, no service.
Is that that's a fashion statement in itself?
Speaker 3No, that's not I don't know.
Speaker 4Deny, then I deny, but I seen you?
Speaker 2Oh and what because you cut someone's hair gives you license to judge them.
Speaker 4There's a lot you learn when you shape someone's look.
I mean, how we present is a mask.
No one is exactly what they look like.
How painfully boring.
So while they're in my chair letting me chop away at little pieces of them, you get to drop the mask and I listen.
Like a therapist, I heals me or no therapist.
They want to fix you.
I prefer to enable better dips twenty years at the same overpriced salunge you hear every entitled complaint.
Convertible in a shop AND's in the lakehouse, and now myn as sources out of town and my husband is canoodling with the maid.
Oh, I always hope for something with more substance.
Maybe I hope too hard.
One day I had this woman come in sunset of her life, glory, silver hair down to her chest.
I loved it.
I wanted it, oh, to age like that, But she said it made her look witchy.
Now who could have put that idea in her head?
Turns out kids were shattering her windows with rocks.
Speaker 5They riding on.
Speaker 4Their bikes, dark of night and no one awake.
Then crash, kill the witch, they yelled, and then they were gone just as fast because acido, poor woman.
I could hear it in her voice.
No not chop it off, chop it all off.
Speaker 6I don't want it anymore.
Speaker 4How it heard her to lie about, let's get you in a chair.
Speaker 3Did you cut it off?
Speaker 4No, that would have been a crime.
Instead, I listened to what she really wanted here sit?
Speaker 3What did she say?
Speaker 4Nothing at first, but I pushed.
I always had that gift, you know, getting people to open up.
Usually it's a lot of cheesemay.
By this time this was different.
Something in her eyes and how her lips scrunched like she was chewing on her words.
Benures and all lone and all.
Speaker 3I want to take those rocks.
Speaker 4I want to find her houses and I want to break their bones.
Al rinkled little thing.
And then she left, Lift your hair, got wrap fist around your neck.
Speaker 3Do you think she did it?
Speaker 8How could she?
Speaker 4No?
That would have been insane.
At least that's what I thought, And it's what got me through the night, because as soon as I got home, there was a stamped in my brain.
Horrible, horrible headache that whole week, actually my last week on the outside of horrible.
Speaker 3Oh careful, what the scalp?
Speaker 4This is nothing?
They after another woman came rolled out a magazine and pointed at a model wanted her seventies disconneon prom emitra.
I'm divine at what I do, but my conscience wouldn't let me, so I tried to wear her somewhere safe.
And you know what she said to me.
If I wanted safe, I wouldn't put nails in my salad.
Speaker 3What I can't believe she met that literally.
Speaker 4I didn't either until she smiled, teas cracked and chipped gums blead.
She needed a dentist, not a perm.
I don't know why she told me, But then the nasia hit and I spent the rest of my shift head first in a toilet, feeling like there was a hole in my got.
I think one of the other girls ended up giving her a PERM.
I didn't care anymore.
I'd swear there was something in the air that week, but all the crazy seemed to ask for me, And the next one was even worse.
Speaker 3Worse than eating nails.
Speaker 4There's always worse, Melina, and it's never who you expect.
Tilt your head for me, wouldn't you wait?
Speaker 3How about are you taking off?
Speaker 4Really had to get either?
Don't you want to know.
Speaker 3Who came next?
Just a trim?
Got it?
Speaker 6Mm?
Speaker 4Now?
This girl so thin and twiggy, it was like she floated in on a breeze Carolina with her heart on the eye.
That's how she signed in in for a trim, just like you.
She didn't make so much as a sweek.
For the full hour, I could tell it was something heavy, something ugly, building up.
But who am I to pry?
If a client wants silence.
I gave them silence.
I was nearly done styling her before she finally spoke, turned to me with her dull eyes and asked if I was married.
No, no, no, I said, I love myself too much to share.
She liked that.
Speaker 3She was jealous.
Speaker 4What about you, I asked, and she went quiet again.
She jamed me in and whispered, I'm going to kill my husband.
I just haven't figured out.
Speaker 3How I was frozen.
Speaker 4I mean, what do you say back?
Don't do it?
Speaker 3Good luck?
Speaker 4I couldn't tell if she was kidding, Or maybe I could, and I didn't want to admit it.
It's not like she waited for me to react.
She just got up, dropped a tip on the counter and left.
Speaker 3Or was it a good tip?
Speaker 4Best of my life?
But not even close to worth it?
My fever that night was like a.
Speaker 8Caulduring fluids, boiling skin, melting every nerve on fire, or at least it felt that way, pinned me down to a bed for two days now.
Speaker 3Still, am I expected to tip?
Speaker 4I mean I would, but ridiculin this is currency enough for once I'm the one talking.
Take a look, how do you.
Speaker 3Feel that's not a trim?
Speaker 4I know, and we're not done yet.
Speaker 3See you, Rhina, Oh, see you and the girl?
Speaker 4Will you kin me?
Chris?
Good luck, Si, you're gonna need it.
Speaker 3How do they know my name?
Speaker 4Ninya?
Haven't you been listening?
You learn all kinds of things in a place like this.
Haven't you worked a service job?
Speaker 3Yeah?
Actually back before.
Speaker 4So you know?
And I've had dozens.
That's why I didn't question it at first.
How you offer a service but they treat you like a product.
People think they have a right to your time, to your attention, and they don't care what you carry home.
I'm just happy to unload.
Even worse when you work for taps.
Speaker 3Were there more clients like her?
Speaker 4Carolina Gegetts Mass No, she was the last, but that wasn't the last time she came.
When I finally forced myself out of bed after that burning fear, I thought enough of this, No more helpful ear?
But what does fate care for our plans?
My first day back, I found her waiting there, almost shivering with fear, cold.
I don't know.
Turns out she'd come every day asking for me.
What an honor?
Speaker 3What did she want?
Now?
Speaker 4A manicure?
Some pastelic color?
And obviously an excuse because I'm no technician.
Mister Iden is my boss.
He knew that.
But there comes Carolina waiting a stack of fifty, so of course he sells me out.
Who cares what I want?
Lorena pisso everybody helps.
Speaker 3Did you ask if she did it?
Speaker 4No?
Remember, I was done asking questions from now on, just smiling and nodding, smiling and nodding.
Hole.
Still, this is for texture.
Speaker 3So she didn't talk to you.
Speaker 4Now, where did you get that?
All I said was that I didn't ask.
So while I prepped the manicure, she stared at me with those big dough eyes, unblinking, uncomfortable, like there was an itch she couldn't scratch.
And I could tell that heaviness, that ugliness from before it was back and she was ready to gossip.
So I laid out a towel and I asked for her hands, And when she spread out her fingers, all I could see was blood on her nails, crusty flooded cutocles, hand stand up to her wrists.
Can you wash it?
She asked, as if a pink salt exfoliant was enough to scrub whatever monstrosity she committed I couldn't speak, I couldn't even look up, so instead she leaned.
Speaker 9In loudina, I so appreciated our last session.
He was such a weight off my shoulders.
You're so easy to talk to.
Speaker 4You know that.
I didn't want to be I didn't want to listen to another word.
She wouldn't stop.
Speaker 9I did it, I really did.
I waited until Rob was asleep.
Then I grabbed my knitting box, took out my seam ripper, and I unsold him.
Speaker 4I looked around, but no one else in the whole room had even flinched.
Was I going insane?
Or was everyone around me losing their minds?
I ran out bio coming up in my throat, and the last thing I saw was Carolina's face.
She looked relieved, like that weight was really gone.
I quit that very day.
Let's get you dried up.
Speaker 3There'd you go?
Speaker 4Shaped up, real nice with some value?
Speaker 3Were you sick again?
Speaker 4Clado ruined my upholstery and pushed the absolute limit on how much I'd be broken A person can take.
But I had to find out if this was awesome twisted job, So I did what any irrational person would do.
They followed her home.
I watched her enter a big gated massion, you know the fancy sword where the bushes are all cut into shapes.
And I waited, quiet and in pain to catch any glimpse of her husband still alive.
It was well after dark before I saw her come out again, wheeling out the trash.
The curiosity ate me a lot.
I had to know what was in those cans.
Now I wish with every bone in my body that I never looked inside.
I jumped in my car and floored La Ville and seat that eighty miles an hour, as fast as my little clanker could go.
That's when I saw the cruiser parked at the burger joint, cop leaning on his hood, and I told him everything about Carolina, her confession, the gorriness in her trash.
I knew I sounded, but I pleaded for him to believe me.
And you know what he did.
He said he believed me, but that he just didn't care.
That punchy mustache man acne on his necks, wet on his collar.
He said he'd seen worse, hell, that he'd done worse chewing on that gristy, tripping burger, he told me, bragging.
Speaker 6Sometimes when there's a body, and I'm supposed to call it in.
I don't, because for a couple of hours after death, there's still warming enough to have fun.
Speaker 4He just kept going, unloading repulsive details after details.
Even after I shut myself in my car and blared the horn, he was at my window and I could still read his lips.
Why wouldn't he just leave me alone?
Speaker 3What did you do?
Speaker 4Nothing?
I regret.
I just wish they hadn't caught me, because that holding seally threw me into.
That was my own brand of hell, not like the rooms we've got here.
Handcuffed, I couldn't even cover my ears while everyone else just spilled and spilled.
There was something wrong with me.
I knew that, but I couldn't stop it.
So instead I screamed the back what I heard, because why should I suffer alone?
Speaker 3How long were you there?
Speaker 4Not long?
Grass, sadios?
I suppose eventually somebody listened to what I had to say, because two doctors showed up from the Pendleton.
Speaker 3What gave it?
The way they dragged you here too?
Speaker 4Dragged me?
No, they offered the help, said they could make the secret stop, and for that I would have claimed in their trunk.
You look like you don't agree.
Speaker 3Why would you choose to come here?
We can't leave?
Speaker 4What makes you think I want to free meals, free roaming and never having to suck up to anyone else for tips, Nina, But it's not Tahiti.
Speaker 3But it'll do.
Did they help you?
Speaker 6Then?
Speaker 4You mean?
Though?
I still hear people's secrets sometimes, but at least the pain is gone.
They've got me on this regimen.
Pills and test and prodding and so on is meant to contain it altogether.
Speaker 3But we'll see.
So then you have heard things while you've been here.
Speaker 4Of course, stranger and stranger every day.
Speaker 3Strange?
Speaker 4How oh no, no, no, I do what you're doing?
Do you think knowing more is always better?
But you're ignoring how it might hurt you?
Speaker 3What do you mean hurt me?
Speaker 4What I mean, Sayuri, is how will you handle the darkest secrets of this place when you don't even know your own?
Speaker 2Wait?
Speaker 3While I was here?
Were you?
Is she ready yet?
Speaker 4Almost?
There's no rushing beauty.
Take a look in the mirror.
Do you like who you see?
Speaker 3That's not me?
Speaker 4Clad o ca see?
Like I said, when it comes to my work, I'm divine, don't worry your secrets safe with me?
Speaker 3What do you mean.
Speaker 4Now?
Are you done?
Yes?
I'm done?
But out you go now, beauty queen, and don't forget to brush your hair?
What's up?
Speaker 6Three far?
Speaker 4Nighty night o?
Speaker 3Damsa same shit every day?
Speaker 8Wait?
Speaker 3Did she leave a bobby bit in my hair?
Speaker 9Hey?
Speaker 4You?
Speaker 3Oh?
Speaker 4Hey?
Speaker 3I thought we had a date.
I know, I'm sorry.
Speaker 2I got caught out for looking up haggard was the implication, and they dragged me into what account for the beauty salt around here?
Lady took her sweet time too.
I'm sorry.
I tried, but I couldn't get out.
It looks nice, yeah, yeah, real nice.
I don't quite feel like myself.
What is that like to feel like you?
I don't really know anymore.
I guess I've never liked to be fussed over, and now even that has been taken away.
The chaplain said something today that I can't stop thinking about.
He said that losing control over your life forces you to re evaluate your identity.
Then have you learned a lot about yourself since you've been here?
To be honest, I have learned that I need other people more than I ever wanted to admit before.
Speaker 3Can I fuss over you for a second.
Okay, you look beautiful.
It's some haircut.
I like it, but it's not the haircut.
Speaker 2I wish we didn't always meet like this, these damn bars between us.
What would happen if we met on the outside, if you said something like that to me the way you just said it.
Yeah, well I might have to reach over and kiss you.
Speaker 3I Kenleena oh YEA.
Speaker 1Thirteen Days of Halloween pennance starring Natalie Morales, Episode eight care written by Alessandra Hara del Castillo and Alexander Williams.
Editing and sound designed by Trevor Young, featuring the voices of Sandra Viadares, Rachel Rosenbloom, Wayne Bastrup, Raphael Corkil, Jeff Bowser, Blair Chandler, Morgan Brown, and Laura Shine.
Directed by Alexander Williams.
Executive producers Aaron Mankey, Noah Feinberg, Chris Dicky, Matt Frederick and Alexander Williams.
Supervising producers Trevor Young and Josh Thain.
Producers Jesse funk Rima Ilkali Nowami Griffin, Chandler Mays, and Casby Bias.
Script Editing by Lauren Vogelbaum, Story consultants Ben Bolan and Matthew Riddle.
Casting by Sunday Bowling CSA and Meg Mormon CSA.
Production coordinator Wayna Calderon.
Production assistants Jenna Johnson and Winona Lowe.
Theme music by Rose Azerti with vocals by Anna Hummler, recorded at This Is Sound Design Studios in Burbank, California.
Engineered by Ross Arnot, Special thanks to Romelia Osorio, Nathan Rule, Glen Nishida, and Rob Mosca.
Thirteen Days of Halloween was created by Matt Frederick and Alexander Williams and is a production of iHeart Podcasts, Blumhouse Television, and Grimm and Mild from Aaron Makey.
Learn more about the show at Grimandmild dot com slash thirteen Days and find more podcasts from iHeartRadio by visiting the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
Happy Halloween,