Welcome back to Bachelor Happy Hours Golden Hour.

Thanks so much for joining us.

We're so excited to be back.

Kathy always always excited.

I'm great.

I'm great.

Today we're answering more of your questions, but first we wanted to wish you all a very, very happy Thanksgiving.

Can you believe Thanksgiving is here?

Susan?

I cannot, But I don't know if anybody is as crazy as I am.

I think every year it gets worse instead of better.

Well, for me, I have passed the torch, as they say, so my kids do the cooking.

I bring the wine, the champagne, and I bring my homemade eggnog bread.

But I don't have to do the turkey.

Do you hear this?

People?

Well, wait, did you.

Hear what she's saying?

When was the less time that you made a turkey?

Because you just said I passed, Well.

I passed the to what it's meaning we are Tradition is always to get out the Christmas china, and that's the first day we use it.

It's Thanksgiving Day and my daughter now has my Christmas china.

My son and daughter have my sterling silver and the crystals, all the stuff we use for the holidays, but we have traditions like I make pecan pie, I make eggnog bread, I make cranberry bread.

I do the baking.

My husband always did the turkey.

So when I say I passed.

The how okay?

Turkey is now residing at my daughter and son's house.

She's a girl in the kitchen, but she can bake.

And you did tell me about that eggnog.

I'm gonna bring you something.

What are you doing for Thanksgiving?

What do you entertaining?

Of course I can't even count maybe twenty twenty five pound bird.

The soup has already been made, you know.

I make Italian wedding soup, which is.

Because you know I heard the Pilgrims came across with some Italian wedding soup.

That is amazing that you have kept the recipe.

But I have graduates to dictating side dishes.

I always and forever did everything on my own.

And I'm getting up there and nobody wants to take that tourch if you will.

So now I have somebody bringing the green bean casserole, and somebody's always somebody brings pumpkin pie.

But go ahead and make it.

You you want mac and cheese.

Go ahead, you want sweet potatoes.

So do you have traditional foods that you because we do traditional foods that you only cook on Thanksgiving.

Only on Thanksgiving and Christmas is the same.

And if I swayed on Christmas Day, they would have heart failure, heart failure.

I am so bored with Christmas dinner.

So wait, you do the exact same thing for Thanksgiving and Christmas?

No, absolutely not, because I'm not that big of a fan of turkey.

So I do the ham.

But we add the Italian to Christmas.

It used to be on Thanksgiving as well, with the raviolis, the meat pulls.

Now they go, what We're not having raviolis not on Thanksgiving?

Now we add the Jewish.

We have cool.

No, I'm just saying we do.

We do like pecan pie, sweet potatoes, We do mashed potatoes, Grady.

The stuffing is seems to be always different.

We seem to experiment on stuffing, which you know, I don't get.

But I love Thanksgiving.

It's my daughter's actually my daughter's favorite holiday.

It's not my favorite.

I love it.

It is one of my favorites.

You know.

Why, let me guess you get to cook.

No, the gift giving, isn't there.

It's not that everybody has to say something they're grateful for.

It's a family day or and or friends.

But it's just to be together.

There's no side stuff, no present opening and kids running around looking, you know, fighting over a gift or the.

Babies I love, We do the same thing.

I will also say my son started this tradition recently with his family.

Every night at dinner they say the highs and lows for their day, which I love.

And so at Thanksgiving, you know, we always have the same prayer that we say every year.

And you're right, it's about family, it's about eating.

But come on, come on, vaterination, come stay with me on this.

I love all the food, but it's craziness right.

Everybody eats, you drink, and then you're staring at piles of dirty dishes.

Come on, it's not all a Norman Rockwell day.

Let's be I.

Don't know if anybody else out there is like this, but Kathy, like you.

My grandmother's china would only come out on Thanksgiving, Christmas and Easter.

My sisters who never entertain on a holiday and cook.

My one sister doesn't cook at all.

But Lisa is a really good cook, and they all come.

Never ever do I not want to put that china out.

They have a rule, don't even think about setting the table.

I go, what now, I.

Put it's at your house?

Yes you they don't paper plates?

Are you ready for this?

Paper turkey plates?

Big?

They're sturdy and even the silver I go, are you freaking crazy?

Wait a minute, wait, bait, they're killing me, Hold on killing me?

Hold on.

I want everyone to hear this.

You use paper plates on.

Ida, they will.

My china will be set right in front of me.

Okay, I say, your house, your rules.

Anyway, I really cannot believe that the holidays are here.

As as you know, I already have all my Christmas decorations up.

But I really do love to take a moment at Thanksgiving and really just be in the moment to be grateful for my family, my friends, my health, and I wish I know you do too, But I want to wish everybody the happiest and healthiest of Thanksgiving.

I hope if you're alone, you find a neighbor, a friend, somewhere to donate your time.

I just hope you find someone to share a meal with and just look back on the air and be grateful for all of your blessings, because even though times are tough.

Say it out loud, say something or a few things that you're grateful for.

I mean, giving thanks is what this day is about.

Also for those that are going to be sad that I just went to the ups store a little couple hours ago and she just lost her dad.

It's always seems like it's this time of the year people lose people.

I don't know why that is.

Do you find that, well, it's around the holidays that Peo will pass.

I don't find that as much.

But thanks a lot for putting that on.

I mean, now I'll let you know somebody dead today.

But I think and you and I've talked about this.

For me, the holidays are hard because I really try to maintain all the traditions.

And we'll talk about this again on another podcast, maybe before the holidays, but I try to maintain all the traditions with my family.

But you know what, there's one really important person missing in my immedia FAMI, and that's my husband.

He's not at the table, and my parents aren't there, and these were the times when we all got together, and I think the holidays bring that up.

But you know what, I try to focus on the positive, my grandchildren, my children, who is there and who's not there?

So welcoming you prayer.

We always talk about those that aren't with us, and our list is getting so big.

I've lost two brothers, both parents.

You know, it's like, okay, we can't mention them all by name now.

Right well, Susan, I'm wishing you a happy, happy Thanksgiving.

Thank you, Kathy and you, and wishing.

All our listeners want to happy healthy.

Everybody's stay healthy and be grateful.

And be grateful because we have a lot to be grateful for.

So how do you make your stuffing?

I love this people, I mean those of you that are listening.

Let me know.

Has anybody ever put sausage in their stuffing?

This is today?

That's Canadian?

I do, is it?

Yeah?

My stepmom's recipe had sausage in it and it's delicious.

But I told you, every year we seem to try a new stuffing, so I never get the same one twice.

Right now, do you stuff the bird or do you like it on the side big bite?

Well, I like it stuffed.

We stuffed the bird, but we don't typically eat it because you know, they're all the things of bacteria and botulism and you know, things that I can't pronounce with nineteen syllables.

But apparently when you stuff the bird there's things bacteria that gets in it.

So typically I cook and I have done the stuffing before, do one outside the bird and then one inside the bird.

Scoop out the bird.

It does flavor it, you know, it does flavor.

The bird flavors the stuffing.

I'm going to blow your mind right now, Susan, this is a yes or no?

Okay, Kathy, has ever made turkey soup from the turkey carcass?

Yes?

You are right?

Yes, I guess would you say that cat?

That was a no break?

I know, but you know I don't call it.

Has Susan ever made turkey soup from the carcass?

I'm gonna go no, you're right.

I'm like us I know all that.

I'm not doing that too.

I'd give it away and somebody else makes it and I'll eat it.

Unbelievable.

I cannot believe it.

Don't make turkey soup?

All right?

Wow?

I make a lot of soups too.

I know you do.

Well.

Happy how about how about the frosting the bird?

Okay, who twenty five pound bird.

I'm reading the thing and I go, oh my gosh, it was like twenty four hours a pound or something.

I was like, wait, wait, wait, no, wait, I've got five hours per five one day per five pounds.

I'm like, oh my.

God, get out your calculator.

I have the funniest story before we get on with our show here.

I was over to friends, oh gosh, at least a week ago, and she was so proud.

She'd been to Costco and she had her She goes, you know, turkeys are expensive and they're hard to find, and you know whatever.

And so she's got the turkey and a couple of us are over there having you know, ladies chat night with wine.

And we both look at each other and I said to my friend, Beth, you what are you talking about.

It's ten days before Thanksgiving.

She goes, it can stay in the refrigerator, said for I started laughing.

She knows that I don't cook, I said, Beth, I don't even that even I know that one.

She goes, are you serious?

Wait?

It gets worse.

She goes, I'll just stick it back in the freeze or I.

Said, you cannot well frosted already.

Yes, oh yeah, yeah out.

I said, you have two choices to say, throw that bird out or cook it tomorrow and bring me some turkey.

I don't know what she did.

Because one of those deep fried turkeys.

I live in Texas.

I have.

Yeah, I mean it's okay, it's just it's not.

The house does and smell good, and that beautiful golden turkey that sits there just shining.

I actually love turkey.

I mean I love.

You're going to be shocked, as you know, Susan.

I can cook, I just don't.

I make a homemade cranberry sauce.

None of this crap out of the can for me.

I make if.

When I used to cook and have Thanksgiving hair, like I said, my husband Darryl did did the bird.

The kids as I got older, would bring you know, the mashed potatoes or something.

Well really not because my husband had to have them a certain way, so he made those two.

But I would do all the baking and I would make homemade cranberry sauce.

Now, can I give you reason number four thousand, nine hundred and sixty two.

I don't anymore because I would spend the time making it, and my kids would come over and go, where's the sliced you know, the ocean spray out of the camp what I mean, really, it's just like, really, kids, what about salad?

It's like, you know how you prepare a beautiful salad with every meal?

Right, most meals?

We don't do green.

Salad on the holidays, they don't make the salad, don't we never?

No?

But do you Okay, Susan, We're going to show our age here.

Do you make jello salads?

I've had them?

Now?

Okay?

Can I tell you I saw in the news, and we all know everything you see in here on TV is true.

They they said that jello salads are making a huge comeback this year, and I have some great ones with Coca Cola that it's like a fizzy salad.

I might crank them out again and make.

People.

I'm just trying to prove to everyone that I can cook, so when mister Wright does come along, I can cook and be fabulous Thanksgiving?

Did you make your own whipped cream?

I do make my.

I absolutely when I make all my pies, I make homemade whip cream.

I'm weird baking.

I will do anything from scratch.

I make my own pie.

I do not baker.

I am.

You know why I'm a good baker, and you know why you're not.

I love you.

Measure out everything and follow the direction and baking.

A little bit more of this or a little pinchon, not.

In baking, not in baking.

In baking, if you put in a little too much baking powder or baking soda, the thing is going to rise right over the pan.

You have to measure, or if you forget it, it won't rise at all.

Well exactly, but I'm saying, I am, I measure.

You're exactly right, and baking is a precise.

I do make cookies Italian cookies only once a year around Christmas, and this year, and of course I make the regards to cookies, and you got to ice in every one of them and put the sprinkles on them, the whole bit.

But this year, my sisters and I do a cookie day at my house.

I have the smallest oven, the biggest house, but the smallest oven.

They've got these grand ovens.

Nobody goes to these.

They just like to destroy mine.

And we have music playing and Mimosa's going.

It's fun and we're all full of flour, and who's making this?

Everybody makes a different cookie.

Well, this year I also go to a cookie exchange, and it's usually the day after me and my sisters.

Guess what.

This year, my cookie exchange is the day before I make cookies.

So now I got to throw that.

In the mix or Susan, it would not be beneath me.

I got to be honest.

Making Christmas cookies.

I do it with the grandkids to ice.

You know, the sugar cookies, but that dough and stuff, I don't.

I just buy the sugar cookies and we cut them out and decorate them.

But what I'm doing with grandkids, yeah.

I have never Well, actually I went to a cookie exchange once and they're a nightmare.

They're a nightmare.

People.

Do you guys like cookie exchange?

Because what I bring home half of it I wouldn't even eat.

Well, it's like, you know what, to me, I'm gonna take flak for this.

Cookies exchange to me are like are like Halloween getting a banana.

You know, some of you a sliced apple, Like, no, thank you.

I want to make my own cookies.

Kathy.

We could go on talking forever but it's time to get into the episode.

So let's start with the question of the day.

Okay, Kat, what do you think about Cereal daters and what do you think are the most important things they miss out on by never being single?

Okay, so I'm going to hold on to your chair, Susan, I'm going to ask you to explain something to me.

Okay, are you ready?

A serial dater to me means someone who never settles down with one person.

They're just constantly That is the Cereal comes in constantly dating people.

They got Sally one night, Susie the next, and if you're a god, you're right, yes, yes, Okay, So my question is.

They never commit?

Well, they never commit.

But the question I have is a question on the question of the day.

Is it that they don't ever want to be single or what you just said that they don't want to commit?

Because I'm not sure.

So that's my question.

Do you think being a serial dater means they're afraid or missing out I'm being single?

What do you think that that's what they enjoy and they only want to date so they don't want to commit.

But what the question read was what do you think are the most important things they miss out on by never being single.

I think what you would miss out on is meeting the right person, like when you're not looking and you're not crazily dating one hundred people.

But maybe they don't want it.

That's my point.

That's exactly right, that is my point.

I think people who are serial I think it's a this is a judgy question in my book, because some people don't want to be committed.

I have friends now at this age who say to me, I don't want to be with one man.

I like going out and dating.

And do they like being alone?

Yeah, they spend time by the one, they travel by themselves, So I don't think they're necessarily connected, I think, is what I'm saying.

I think that people who are serial daters either what you just said, don't want to commit, or they just like you know, varieties of spice of life.

Are they dated more than one person at one time?

Could you say no?

I mean I've had a date with someone and then a week later gone out with someone else, and then maybe gone back and had a date with the first guy.

But no, I don't listen.

I'm old.

I can barely remember the days of the week at this point.

Let's see, was it John tonight Jim?

I can't remember.

I could not keep that together.

No, but I'd be good at serial dating at all.

Uh.

I'm I'm a relationship person.

I am too, I am too, but I think I think for me, I am definitely single.

Sad to say at this point, but I think I don't miss out if if I am dating, do you feel like you're missing out?

You are actually a good example, Susan.

You have to be dating.

You're rarely single.

I mean now you're really not single.

But you've always said to me for years but no, but you always had someone to date you always.

No, I went years, well since you met me.

After you met me, I didn't meet Frederic until this year.

No, you were dating you dad several dates with guys in the time i've known you.

Do we need a list dates?

Because I went back to somebody I was familiar with, the hang out with that date.

No, no, no, but then you had some other guys you dated.

I don't know.

For me, I don't mind.

I'm very happy being by myself, and I've had to come to terms with that because I never thought I would be so.

But what he thinks that.

Yeah, But I think for me, like they're serial dating, which is you know, I need.

To ask you something serial daters.

Okay, so a man dates constantly?

Yeah, And for me, looking at that picture, I wouldn't be able to ask him certain questions like well what are we doing this week?

Because you got to wait for him to ask you for another date?

Relationship.

What if he's dating serial dating but he dates the same person every week.

Well you're wait a second, You're saying he's the serial dat I'm saying, what if I'm dating, which I haven't done.

But if I'm dating, let's call it three guys at a time, you know, And and I maybe I'm going to call him and say, hey, Rick, do you want to go to the Ballue Festival and Albuquerque with me next weekend?

I mean, it doesn't always have to be the guy.

I'm saying.

For me, I can't do it.

It's too I can't keep my own day straight.

You know, I would get their names confused even I mean, yeah, I don't necessarily think people miss out on anything not being single.

If they, I think it's a it's a lifestyle, it's a choice, And I don't think it's a bad thing necessarily to be a serial date or if date.

I'm sorry, I wouldn't want to date a serial dater because my idea of dating is getting to know somebody to go into a relationship and get comfortable with.

To me, dating, you don't have sex, you don't ask certain questions, you don't expect things like you would in any relationships.

Well, I think, I think, I know this wasn't precisely the question, but you and I often go rogue on these things.

I think the bigger issue is what you just said.

You have to know if you're dating a serial dater, what the limitations are, and if you're both good with it, great.

But to your point, don't go dating a serial dater who you know is dating you Friday night, somebody else, Saturday night, somebody else for brunch on Sunday, and be expecting that you're going to turn him or her around because you're probably all right.

Let's get into our fan questions and see if somebody wants to know about serial dating today.

I'm going to start us off here we go.

Question one is from anonymous.

Hi, ladies, I need to know if this is something I should compromise on, so I was using my boyfriend's iPad the other day.

He gave me the password when he got it and told me I could use it whenever, and he accidentally left his journal up.

When I realized, I went to swipe away, but I saw my name.

I only caught a glimpse of it, and it was about him hating that I swear so much.

I really wish I didn't see it, but now it's stuck in my head.

We've been together for over a year and he's never brought this up before.

Should I say something?

I don't even really swear that much.

I'm not sure what to do and would love any advice you have.

Thank you.

Oh, I can answer this so quickly.

Don't say a word so quickly.

You want to be your boyfriend.

It's really simple, sweetie.

Stop swearing.

Stop swearing, that's all.

It's that simple.

And your boyfriend your boyfriend.

I would bring it up to him after you go six months without swearing.

I might say, hey, Johnny, did you notice that I don't say the F word.

I don't say you know, you know, the whole like saying I'm on air?

Did you notice?

And when he looks and says yeah, say you know what.

I saw it in your iPad that you didn't like me swearing, and I like you so much that I made change few And oh, by the way, be careful what you put in your iPad because I do have the password.

No, I would never I'm kidding.

I was joking at the last.

But I think I don't think it's I don't think.

I mean, it doesn't sound like she read the whole thing she just saw.

I mean, i'd let it go.

I would just stop swearing.

And I would stop swearing, try to be more.

I mean, ship, how do you stop swearing?

Susan?

Damn it, Kathy.

I mean, but that's a good one, Anonymous, Like, never tell you it, because it's not like you were snooping.

You just want to use it.

But first of all, I'm impressed that a man still writes a journal.

Okay, you have to leave it up on his iPads.

Maybe he wanted her to see that.

There you go, Look at you conspiracy theorists over here.

I think, I mean, listen, what I would say is get your own epad, stop using his, and ever.

Oh you ever, you want to know things that bother him so you don't do them anymore.

That's like a gift.

It's a gift, and if you really do like him, and I swear a lot too, but I don't swear like at people, but I just say stupid words.

Anyhow, I said.

Wait a minute, I have to ask a question.

The first question she said was I need to know if this is something I should compromise on.

What compromise, sweetheart?

Anonymous?

I mean, it's either hell yes or hell no.

You're either there's no comp You're going to say shit every other day.

I mean, well, maybe because she's obviously thinking she doesn't do it that much, but maybe it's more than she realizes.

So just take it to a self check.

Okay, So we were talking earlier about compromise and settling.

This would clearly be a compromise issue, and probably Anonymous the smallest one you're ever going to compromise on.

I mean, is he a.

Goody two shoes?

Though?

I mean, does he not even say damn?

Like we don't know who we're dealing with.

I don't know, but I find it interesting that you and I were talking about compromises an earlier podcasttling, compromising and settling.

This is clearly not settling.

It's you know, life is tough, anonymous, life gets tough if you're happy with your boyfriend, compromise and I put quotes around it.

Stop your damn swearing.

Okay, And he's never brought it up to you, so just leave well enough alone.

That was a little gift from your little guardian angel saying there's one thing that he's not real it doesn't care for, so just alter it a little bit.

Don't change overnight and be holier than now, you know, just be you.

But just be aware, that's all.

Yeah, be aware and be agree now.

Yes, God, if that's the biggest issue you and your boyfriend had, no, you're lucky.

I want to meet his old I want to meet his father, all right.

The next one, Kathy is from Shelley.

Okay, She says, Hi, Kathy and Susan.

I need to know if I am overreacting.

My boyfriend has always had a crush on a really popular influencer.

Oh no, him talk.

About her once when it came up in a group setting.

But I'm fully aware of how he feels about her.

Lol.

Well, during a game night with our friends, he was asked if he has a celebrity Hall pass, to which he stated this influencer.

We've never discussed this, and it honestly really put me off.

I hate the idea of hall passes and would not be comfortable with that since it's so unlikely it'll ever happen as it's is it worth me bringing up that I am not okay with it?

I guess since she's an influencer and not a full blown celebrity, it feels slightly more possible.

I just can't get it out of my head.

Let me know if you think I'm overreacting?

Can I just say one thing?

It's not fun to be jealous, but that's what this is.

Can I can I?

I mean, we're going to talk about this, but Shelley, first of all, when you said your boyfriend All has always had a crush on a really popular influencer, damn, Shelley, you found out about me?

Just kidding?

Yes, she is overreacting.

Yes, so let me just say my Kathy school me hall past Okay?

I knew year That's where I was going.

A lot of people don't know what it means.

A hall past means if if you know, if I have a if I have a crush on Matthew McConaughey and I'm hey, can I have a hall pass?

Meaning if Matthew McConaughey comes around, you know, I can get it on.

With the past with your partner.

In other words, a hall past means if Matthew McConaughey rings my doorbell and I'm married or in a relationship, it's okay.

If Matthew and I got yes, it's.

Okay with your whoever person.

Yeah, it's called the hall pass, like.

They know the hall passes.

Well, come on, are you overreacting, Shelley, Yes, you are.

My kids talk about hall passes with each other.

You know that somebody an athlete that one finds attractive or a Hollywood star.

I mean, it's it's more just a kind of a fun thing.

I think Susan's right, jealousy, especially of somebody who's out in the lithosphere, who has probably no chance of ever meeting your boyfriend.

And it's like it's like a celebrity crush.

Really, I mean, and I know how she feels, because I feel like, well, I want him to think that about me.

I want him to get excited about me instead.

Are you serious sure I've always done that?

No?

No, No, you're going to have a problem if Frederic has a celebrity crush on Jennifer Aniston or.

Or my ex husband loved Julie Roberts.

And that bothered you.

No, okay, well that's what we're talking about here, a really popular influencer, which means that she is probably on social media and she's who cares.

I don't mean to make life.

No, I agree with that.

I do agree with it.

But it's the feeling that he thinks somebody's all that when you want him to think you're all I'm sorry feeling right now?

Insecure?

You're both insecure, Yes, both of you, Shelley, you and Susan dy debl little conversation.

I'm graduated, trust me, I'm sixty, Okay, I have.

I think it's cute.

When you really gotta worry, Shelley, is when he's telling you he's got a crush on the girl next door literally who lives next doory, then you might have a problem.

Or he spends too much time with the boss's wife.

Now you got a problem.

So do I think you're overreacting?

One?

Yes?

Shall we He obviously thinks he's hot.

Yeah, but somebody that you think's hot, that's all.

But he's your boyfriend, you know, enjoy it and relax.

I really think you're overreacting.

And I don't mean to make a funny er, Shelley, but let it go, Let it go.

Okay, all right, Today we're going to do another Golden Spotlight.

This time we're talking about grandchildren that we adore.

Kathy, Okay, how to ask your children politely about when they're having kids, balancing your children's wishes as parents, and your wisdom about parenting as a grandparent.

What it's like.

Well, let's take one of the Okay, just take one at a time.

The let's start with I have never asked my children if and when they were having kids.

Did you No, I did not, and I got surprised early on.

Yeah.

I don't think it's appropriate to ask your children when they're having kids.

That's their decision.

And I will tell you my husband and I were married eight and a half years before we had our first child, and my fabulous in laws, yes, they did say when are you going to have children?

You know, and then we have three they said when are you going to stop having children?

So, you know, I have learned to never ask those questions.

I think that is we know that we love being grandparents, and we don't.

Some people don't say it with any malicious intent.

It's really I just want to be a grandmother.

I want to be a grandfather.

But I really think you don't know what's going on behind clothes stores.

You don't You don't know if your children can afford the child.

You don't know if job, you don't know, if they maybe can't get pregnant.

You know what, worry about your own life, not your children's.

And I think a lot of this is and this is difficult for many many grandparents.

When you're watching your child in their spouse or your you know, whether it's your son or your daughter, how they're raising their children, and what you don't agree with some things, it's really difficult to bite your damn tongue.

I might have picked my tip off a couple times.

I think it's only once or twice that I've actually raised my voice for my opinion that I think they're dead wrong and you really need to think about this.

Well.

I will tell you I to stay your neutral.

Yeah, but and that tells.

You when you walk away, Kathy, it eats me up.

Well, I stay neutral for the most part, except a cage.

First of all, you know, my son is read married, the one Kyle, the one you you officiate his wedding and his my granddaughter, who's seven, is just an angel.

I mean, but you know she's a product of divorce.

She's had to grow up quickly.

She has great manners.

I think my son, Kyle, if you are listening, I think you are a fabulous dad.

Now my daughter and there they have a two year old.

And but I she's gonna kill me for saying this.

The other day I said, Caitlyn, you're raising a terrorist.

I mean, the child is so stubborn.

I love her, I laugh, But I ky, no, I am not stubborn.

She except her father, Oh yeah, he is stubborn.

Caitlyn can be stubborn.

But oh no, this child.

There's a There is now a picture of my granddaughter in the dictionary under the word stubborn.

But I say very little, like occasionally I will say something and my daughter now listens to me because you know, I don't know if you know this, Susan, but I was very stupid in my daughter's eyes until she had a child.

Oh I share that.

I told you she calls me, now, how did you do this?

I do think that we have wisdom, and I think our kids, when they want our advice, they'll ask for it.

Unfortunately, there is a dichotomy between the amount of advice they want and the amount of advice we want to give.

Is the problem.

But I try to ask by all means, we'll give them our opinion.

Or oh, come on, are you saying you never give advice when you're not asked?

No, I try not to with Brittany, I do you try Christopher.

I jump in if I think he's too hard on Mason, and I'll say it.

I jump in more when I think they're being unreasonable and you're having a bad day and you're taking it out on your kids.

You know, we just had a situation like that and Dickie was venting with me and I said, you know, Dickie, I did those things.

He goes.

She was cussing like he didn't do anything wrong.

I said, we've had you weren't here, you were off playing baseball.

I was dealing with kids day in, day out, and they didn't submit their homework or their project on time.

Yet it was done.

I am frustrated I'm having a bad day, and yes, we do stupid things that we regret, but it happens, So don't judge them for that.

Yeah, I mean I don't, and I don't think you do either.

I want to know, on a scale of one totten season, how much do you like being a grandmother?

Oh my god, someone Susan's grandmother's name is Mimi and I'm Kiki.

So how do you like being a me?

Me?

I love it.

I love it.

I love it beyond because they love me.

They love me.

They're never mad at me because I always say yes most of the time.

I mean, I have said no, but it kills me.

So the little terrorist who shall go nameless when I when I come into our house lately, she'll look at me well when I first come to go Kiki, and she'll run and hug and kiss me.

And then it's like, oh, now it's time to have dinner or something, and I'll say, Okay, we're gonna get up in your height chair or whatever, and she'll say no, Kiki, no, and Kiki sit there.

I mean, I'm telling you, the child I kills it.

I love those my two granddaughters like no other.

I don't think I was prepared for how much I would love them now I don't know.

But here's my question.

I mean, we know Frederick lives, so you just have to work with me here.

How do you feel about moving away?

Because I know your your daughter's children don't live quite as close but pretty close.

How would you feel about but Chris's daughter you see a lot.

How would you feel about not being able to see your grandchildren?

Like like every weekly baseless, I'd have to there would be some rules that I would get here every eight ten weeks.

Yeah, oh see, I have my things.

I would mine would be once a month if I would come and spend a week out of every month if I could, because they grow so fast, they.

Do, and you miss so many things Like there I was with you actually on the cruise and Estella had her first dance recital and I wasn't there and it killed me, but it killed my son even Moore, Yeah exactly, but I was there for her first cheerleading game in the writing, so at least I got to do that.

So you know, there's do you see that's it?

Can't do you see?

I see my children doing some of the things that I did as a parent.

I see them do now, even though, like I'll give you an example.

Uh, Kyle's daughter, my granddaughter, Linley, she plays piano.

And you don't know this, or maybe you do.

My three kids were uh they won competitions, they had offers for free rides for music.

I mean they were really good.

But but I I was a terrorist.

They practiced an hour a day every day.

They were really accomplished pianists, and they used to bitch and moan about it.

But now Kyle has Linley taking piano, and he's not as rigid.

I mean, who could be as I was about practice, But I see that he realizes how important it is a musical instrument is.

And then and you're paying a lot of money to have them get lessons and the piano itself and so on.

It's just it's just it's the it's the structure of its first of all.

I mean, I love music and I love hearing piano, but it's the structure of this is part of your day.

You're going to practice in Lindley might only practice ten minutes.

But I love seeing Kyle, you know, you know, tapping out the beat like I used to and just see what you know, seeing him.

It's like you see the next genera with.

Her, and that's important.

That's a great bonding moment, even though she's a bitch about it sometimes.

But she's young yet.

So what is the hardest challenge you find about being a grandparent other than us keeping our mouth shut about this one?

What's the hardest thing you find about being a grandparent.

I don't think anything's hard except when I, like you said, other than my children being too hard on them?

What's hard for me?

The youngest ones, the two four year olds.

I don't know that I'll be here for their wedding.

Oh, Susan, they're four Kat a two year old.

I'm going to be there for her wedding.

I'm older than you are.

I think positive girlfriend put out the universe.

You asked me what I thought.

That's what I told you.

All right, that's right.

I don't find anything hard except.

You're gonna laugh, and you're gonna laugh when I say this, okay, And I can't believe I'm beting this.

So.

My sister lives in Canada, is the most creat native person on the planet.

Like she When we went there this summer, she had made capes for the granddaughters and hair ribbons and she mixed up on egg cartons.

I don't know where.

I don't know where it comes.

She is so creative.

That's not who I am.

But but a challenge for me is trying when when I babysit them coming up with activities because I want my grandchildren to want to come and spend time with me.

And I know that it's all my friends who have older grandchildren say Kathy and enjoy I'm young because when they get to be teenagers, the last thing they want to do is come to Kiki's house.

So it is a challenge for me to come up with things when they're little.

You know, you can put them in the stroller and we're going to go leaf hunting, turtle hunting, look at the birds up the park.

I'm saying all those things.

Come to Walmart or the dollar store and let them pick out new things like the stella the other day, got prestol and finger nails and I have to come home and do it or polish their nails for girls.

Yes, well that kind of stuff.

I'll do that, But I'm I'm I'm trying to my grandmother with an experienced grandmother.

I remember planting bulbs in the garden with our song.

I'm constantly trying to come up with those things that my granddaughters will remember as opposed to taking them shopping.

I want to have experiences and it's.

A challenge shopping too.

Kath Well, your grandchildren, well mine are like.

No, we dig in the dirt.

We do.

That's a challenge for me.

In Tovy.

Tovy digs in the dirt with me and they want to water the flowers and me me, this one really needs it.

Yeah, it's but you know what, it's good.

We're leaching.

But we're teaching them that their place in community, that there's more important things than themselves.

iPad time, Like, yeah, I had her not too long ago for the day and I remember asking her mother, is her iPad in there is a charge?

She said yes, we never got on it.

We didn't have enough time.

In a second, that was I don't let you let your I do not my so my my Linley her mother, And I'm sad to say this.

Linley is on the iPad all the time.

She would go outside when not at her dad's house, no iPads.

When she comes to my house, there is no TV unless like late at night, well not late night, but you know, after dinner, we might watch half an hour something on Disney to get her settled for bed.

But I am that's technology is absolutely no.

When I have my granddaughter, they have enough.

When I'm cooking dinner and she's not just getting tired and I'll let her sit with her iPad and put a movie on it for yeah, on the TV.

And we never even get to watch the whole thing.

Yeah, but that's about the only time because we stay busy, okay, rainy day.

We color, we you know, try to play a game.

We dance, we put the.

Music up before we Before we leave this topic, I have to I have to say this one of the best things.

I never thought I would say it, one of the best things about being a grandparent.

They come and they go, and they go.

I love on them.

We play, We have so much fun.

Kiss love.

I mean, I'll do anything, and then and then it's like here you go, honey, bye bye.

Kiki loves you KEI sees it and we facetimed.

Yeah, kisses exactly.

I mean, I love them.

But when I was in my fifties, you're gonna think got nuts.

When I was in my fifties, I used to think about, you know, adopting a child.

I talked about and he looked me like I was crazy.

But I I still have the energy if you want to be honest to raise a child.

I'm just more selfish now.

And there's other things I wanted to but I have to ad meet.

Handing them back over is like okay, yeah, bye, love you.

Okay, well that is so much fun.

We thank thank you to our listeners for joining us today.

We hope you learned about grandparenting what I don't you know what?

I would love to hear your ideas.

Please send me your ideas for cra crafts.

I need craft and they have to be really simple.

Don't tell me to like get egg Carton's and you know, cut them with fringe scissors, like oh yes, anyway, And make sure guys to follow us on follow Bachelor Happy Hour as we have new episodes and more conversations coming out every week that you don't want to miss, and make sure you submit your questions to us.

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A good week.