Wind Down with Janet Kramer and I'm Heeart Radio Podcast.

Okay, hey guys, what's up.

Merry Christmas Eve?

Yay?

I love Christmas Eve.

Oh, it's one of my favorites.

It's kind of like that feeling when you're at the gate in the airport or on the airplane and you just know, you just there's nowhere else you can go.

Here we are, Yeah, what's done is done.

Take a deep breath.

I love how everyone's like with their families and like, you know, it's like I don't know.

And then church on Christmas Eve.

Oh, it's just the best.

Just love it.

Yeah, Christmas Eve is a church is my favorite tradition for sure.

It's not just Christmas Eve.

Guys.

We have a big, big, fun Christmas tomorrow and I'm excited to tell you about it another episode.

I cannot wait.

Is this the surprise we've been talking about?

Huh?

Okay, I can't wait to find out.

It's a big Christmas Day at the Breastthouse.

Oh, it's going to be great.

I'm really excited.

And do you have your kids tonight?

Yes?

I will have the kids Christmas Eve night, and I yeah, it's good.

It's so hard I don't know what is worse, to be honest with you, that's and just you know, coming from the single you know, there's from the divorced parent over here.

It's it's not easy not having them Christmas Eve night and having them come down in the morning Christmas morning.

But it's so hard having them leave Christmas Day.

It really is, because it's just then going to be me Roman and Allen, and it's just it feels, I will say too.

Noon comes so fast on Christmas Day and it's so hard.

It's it's like every year it's harder and harder.

So this year you have them tonight until tomorrow morning until noon on Christmas Day, and a piece of me almost thinks that it's I mean, I like getting them Christmas Day at noon too, because then we have Christmas dinner together, so we'll do our nice big dinner Christmas Eve.

But Christmas it's kind of stolen for us, and it just makes me sad for me at least.

Yeah, and I don't know that there's any way around it.

Yeah, yeah, there's not a good no.

So it's it really stinks.

So that's like when you say like, oh, everyone's about the family.

Yeah, not really it's for my situation and for their parents that are divorced.

It's just I don't think they'll ever be a year that it'll be like, oh, this was great, it was totally happy, because I don't think it's it just sucks not having your kids the full day Christmas and then other years not having them Christmas Eve night.

Like it's just one of the very I think unfair things about divorce and gosh, why I stayed for so long so that I didn't have to feel this right now again, so blessed.

You know, we have Rome and have Alan, but it's not having that pole sure, yeah, and then it's don't have family here.

So this is something too that I was thinking.

I'm like, do I not have any like?

Because when I was thinking for Thanksgiving, this is going to go really negative and I'm not meaning at all.

I think it's all like fair to be real.

Yeah, absolutely.

On Thanksgiving we were talking about not knowing what to do because we didn't have the kids.

You know.

Amy is like, well, I'm sure you have plenty of friends that will invite you over.

I go, no, not one has, And they're like, well, because maybe they don't think you'd come I was like, no, I still feel like they would ask.

And I was like, this is not a knock on you guys not asking me to come over for Thanksgiving.

But like you guys all have your family.

Well we go like we go, we go to our rights, which we have invited you there before, but I understand not wanting to come there either.

I think we have to make a new So what's interesting is we've never we always just do just the four of us or four or the five of us.

Now it's in the five of us, but like we used to, we hosted Preston's parents a couple of times and that just felt like it just is not great for me.

Guys.

You know, it's just a lot of and a lot of little kids and it just all falls on me.

So we decided not to do that.

And this last year was our first year that we made plans kind of really early to just go like, okay, what actually feels good for Thanksgiving?

And we decided to take a little road trip and it was great.

But we usually are by ourselves too, so I'm wondering if we need to do Like I know, Preston kind of had a problem with our setup this year.

It was really fun and amazing, but he feels like we should be with family, not be with somebody else's family.

And because Laney and Corey had their families and I don't think anything of it because I have collected my family, you know, But for him, he has this really like I think it's just hard for us because you guys are still you have your solid buy family.

Yeah, it's just me Alan and Roman and so it doesn't feel like a family, right though we are a family, yes, right, So it's like, I know, so even for Christmas Day, it's like, okay, well we're not gonna like I mean, we would if we got the inviight, but like and it's fine, you know that we don't.

But I don't know, it's just like it's weird.

It's kind of like I just want the day to be over once the kids leave, because.

I do miss us doing our Christmas.

Was it Christmas Day or Christmas?

It was Christmas Day?

We did it, We did it whatever the kids.

Yeah, yeah, well you had yeah, you had the kids, and so we would do it.

I can't remember if it was Christmas Day or Christmas Eve, but you had the kids both of those times.

So that was a lot easier and now it Yeah, so sure you do, miss do.

Yeah.

So I'm like, Christmas Day at noon, check on your uh, check on your peeps that have been divorced that lose their kids.

Because even though we have again new family, it's still not your whole family, right, yeah, it's not your whole fam and it just feels sad.

And I'm like, so, I'm so excited, so get back to I'm so excited.

But it does have that looming of course attached and I just like that just stinks.

I mean, I did.

I did invite my ex over because another thing for them too, It's like, he doesn't have family here, so I don't want to just be him and the two kids.

But I know that he usually goes to a friend's house.

But I think you know to that, I'm like, well, if we want to be together, I'm like, hey, just f yi if you want to come over, you know, selfishly, I want to see the kids, you know, but like, and if you want to bring over whoever you want, He's like, I'll think about it.

It's most likely not going to happen because we got into a fight about one of the gifts that he was giving Jase for Christmas.

So that's another story.

But I could still see y'all getting there eventually, like when he if he's got somebody eventually, y'all.

Yeah, but has you know someone that that happens, like I will always want the unit to be together, of course, and why not.

Yeah, but again I've never asked Alan.

I would need to ask Alan about that, sure, because I did kind of ask without.

Thinking back.

Now if you're going to say, yeah, yeah, but yeah, because I just I think it's for the kids too, And I guess that's for me too, like wanting my kids under the same roof on Christmas, that's okay.

I can put my feelings aside, and I would assume Alan would do the same because he knows that, like my mama heart would be like so happy.

And that's not being selfish, you're putting that aside, for it's good for everybody.

Yeah, it's good for you, it's good for Mike, it's good for your kids, it's good for everybody.

So I can see where that would be a great thing.

So TBD, but most likely, and this is the thing too, like I don't want to be the mom that's ripping down Christmas on noon, which I've done prior to having Roman Broman, Like, I don't want to ruin his Christmas too.

So once he starts to get older and recognizing it, like yeah he knows what Sannah is.

But once he gets more involved, like, I'm going to have to just change the narrative a bit.

So he's not like, why is mommy crying on Christmas?

Right?

Yeah?

And why are his kids going here?

And why am I not enough for her to keep crying?

You know what I mean?

So I'm like, oh God, I gotta get one more year to real this thing.

No, you're doing great.

I mean I just can't having to navigate it.

No, yeah, that's right.

I mean it's just the heart.

It's just literally the hardest thing.

There's no right or wrong answer.

Is anyone last minute shopping or are we done?

No?

But I will done.

Husband is out shopping as we speak.

No, he waits till last minute.

Preston yesterday said so anything we need, and I go for what, Like I'm like, not even trying to be a smart ass, I'm going like for what And he's like, well, for Christmas, And I'm like, dude, dude, are you kidding me?

We've got two days until Christmas?

This is yesterday?

What is that?

And I'm like, no, we are as good as we can be.

But great, I will say, Alan is he has gotten all the stuff for our big Christmas Eve dinner.

So and he is the chefs, which is very sweet.

So did he do that for us last year?

When did we do that?

I think that was two years ago?

It was the last year of twoyears.

Yeah, he cooked.

He's such at I was like I remember this, I know, yeah that was that was great.

I can't remember when we did that though Christmas.

Christmas, we'll have to redo that again.

Yea.

Yeah, we just need maybe we need to sit down with our planners, like where the family and just go like, okay, who's got the kids?

What are we doing?

Like I think that's it now that we're all coming up from toddler air, yes, and can like take a second and go like what do we.

Well, that's the thing.

It's all the needs are all so different, I mean, you know, like kid wise and or.

Even when my husband's going to be home you know.

Yeah, we had a pop up show the other day and I was like, are you taking that and what is that, you know?

Like it's a wild for sure, good times, wild times.

The one thing maybe worth noting.

I don't know if this will be helpful, but I have called this the Brave Season, and one of the things I planted in was how brave Mary was.

And so my thing over the last few years has just been to have myself, have myself a Mary, m a r y little Christmas, Mary, Little Christmas, and just to think of the bravery, the misunderstanding, the knowing, the rooting, and the journey and how brave that was.

So just passing that along if that settles anywhere with anyone that can help.

Love the my heart or a dad heart.

Do we have any dads to listen?

I don't know, but I do wish us all a merry yeah Christmas and has a very merry Christmas.

Calm twas the night before Christmas and all through the couch.

You guys, you're the songwriter.

I was hoping you'd got.

A mouse.

Love you guys, have a beautiful Christmas and we'll see you on New Year's Eve.

Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas.