Swine Down with Janet Kramer and I'm Heeart Radio podcast.

Well, I feel like we just need to start with how's your trip?

Which one?

I know?

Wow, York, Tampa.

I try really harder time I say Tampa not to sound like I'm from Michigan, so hard to Tampa.

I feel like if I didn't watch so like, I see you every week.

I see all every week.

But if I had not watched social media, I would have had zero clue that you were gone last week on two different trips.

Well it was back to back, I know, which is amazing.

That was great.

It's also weird because the kids are getting more into sports, into all their things, where things are less easy to miss, you know, and so like, while we homeschool and we do that for the freedom flexibility, we're still all these other obligations.

Do you have a question around a post that you put?

Oh, I hope this is good.

Ah, I love it when she.

But first, let's talk about how was New York incredible?

Love Live, Best Life and by Sarah Jessica.

Parker's I will cry right now.

Yeah, I mean it's such a moment.

It's so good, guys, I can cry literally right now it's going to forever be in my DNA and I can.

I am fine being ridiculous about that and being so dramatic.

I don't even care.

I got the uber door opened, and I wish it was a taxi, but Preston's like, I have to get you the right kind of taxi.

I feel a lot of pressure about it.

I had to be a black car like Big, or a tax.

A black card like Big.

Yeah.

He's like, I'm not letting you get out of here in a minivan, no offense.

He's like, you just deserve it.

But he was just.

That's so Miranda Minivan, so good about he just and Preston was like all right, like you know, people kept coming up and taking pictures.

Anyways, we don't spend too much time on it.

But he was such a good husband in that moment.

He just would not take stop taking He's like, we got a walk again, any more arms, any more movement for the shot?

Like it was amazing, so good at taking photos.

I know it was awesome.

So was this his idea or was it your idea?

Well, he was floored that I had never been well, I can't believe that's what I was going to say, I know, but it's almost like, I don't know I needed it.

It was it too close chapter of a book, end of you know how you don't like to read the end of a book.

Maybe I think I just wanted to be in a really like a good place in life or something.

I know that's silly, but I I don't know.

It's just so it was so meaningful, and it was the love's tenth birthday trip and we both did like bucket list things.

We neither of us had ever seen a Broadway production at Gershwin, so that was my first Gershwin and her first Gershwin together.

And it just feels better when things are you're not just checking them off the list, which, by the way, you saw Wicked, we did, and I ended up I ended up watching Wicked for good oh good second one.

And I was making pizza because we're big into making pizzas now, because I know I needed to make her It is so fun and get the kids into it.

It's great.

But while we were making the pizza, that scene came on and I'm like, oh, come on, oh good.

It didn't bother me for a minute neither, and it didn't bother me.

I just understand.

Yes, a five year old, it could be a little, of course, but it did it bother me either.

I just remember going Jolie saying, oh they're kissing.

No, yeah, that she comprehended that.

Yeah, that's the thing.

I mean, really, what five year old is really comprehending what that was?

Insinuating more of Again, if it was Elsa, it would be a different I would be more exactly.

I agree, absolutely wicked taste.

I thought it was tastefuly.

Yeah.

I loved that movie so good.

I need to go back and watch because we The problem is is we did it in like a five part series because it's like thirty minutes before thirty minutes long too, so yeah, and you just want to see the whole story, you know, like we take the baby, which there comes a judgment, but we took Wyane with us to go watch it, and so there was a couple of parts.

Even we've watched it at home, I've been like, oh, I didn't even get to see that part, right, you know, just busy all right, back to your trips.

Anyways, it was weird.

It was we left lying girl behind and that was the best thing we've ever done.

She's not old enough to get into Wicked.

So that was our deciding factor, which, by the way, no pun intended, which.

Which has to do with the post, has to do with the post.

Uh oh.

When I read your post saying this was the last trip we're not doing with Lyon, mm hmm, but like, really, no, really, I can't.

She's she's at the age.

It's like we forget, right, we forget that they're little humans that are like understanding, digesting feelings in English.

Sure, like legend's been guilty, so it's a European thing.

No, like I'm saying without her, like either it's all kids at home or it's all kids with us.

But understood why you did it.

She's just a little too young for New York.

You guys.

And and I thought, listen, the weather typically in January, and I looked ahead and it looked pretty clear.

But I thought, if we're dealing with snows and strollers and car seats, I can't lot.

Those big kids absolutely impressed me.

I have never been more proud of them.

They walked, We did that.

I'd never walked the Brooklyn Bridge before.

Oh wow, we walked to the Brooklyn Bridge together, and we were all a little scared, could get a nervous about heights except for data, and it was just incredible.

So it just was hard because I missed her, and so selfishly I facetimed home.

Do you want this is embarrassing.

I shoudn't even say this part, and here she goes.

Preston was like, I can't believe you just did that, Like even I would never do that.

Oh god, what I didn't just FaceTime?

I face timed her from the Museum of ice Cream.

Oh, Kristin.

They were in the sprinklepool President's of course, She's sad.

What did you just do?

It's like if I facetimed roman A, like I don't know a monster truck.

Yeah, like it's not fun to show.

Yeah, look where we are.

And the kids are eating.

I was legend her doing snow angels and sprinkles, and she just was like you could just see her devastation.

And I've just never seen her actually have hurt feelings.

She has two year old over the top feelings right now, but I've never seen something kind of like hit and then hit again, and then like the bottom lip came out, and I was like, I'm an idiot.

I shouldn't have done this, but it was incredible.

And then we.

Flew Dada and Legend flew onto Tampa to the other half of the duo, and Love and I came home to get lying girl give the puppy to the trainer in Jesus name, and then she had mandatory cheer living that life cat cat.

And we flew to Tampa that next night and that was fun.

That was, guys.

Another admittance.

I brought sickness to someone else's house knowingly.

Well, no, I didn't know, and I felt awful, but we talk about it on here.

Just still.

I thought something different.

It was something different, Janna, I wanted to die, poor thing.

You've been in it.

We've been so in it.

We did eight days of belly fleu.

Oh, just g.

It was out of It was out of like a Will Ferrell movie, the kind of you know, like it's the over the top, hysterical kind of Yeah.

And then we got over that.

I thought, well, now we've got good immunity where you know, we had like a week in between anyways, so we are now on the.

Other side of that.

But I felt so bad.

Chris and Caitlin might be the most patient humans on the planet because they were like, it's not like you were finding voluntarily.

No, but that's still just we're in their house.

Yeah, well nothing you can do.

Yeah, but I was trying to nest and like, you know, overcompensate because I felt so bad.

But all in although you like the family aspect of the closeness, do you feel close?

Are you good?

Yeah?

We needed it, Yeah, we really needed it.

And I kind of fought hard to protect New York for our family because we had other family that was wanting to come.

And I know, you know.

It's just interesting because I feel like Love is hitting Ten and I don't want to get emotional talking about this, but Ten is such an emotional moment for me with her, like they're just.

Getting so big, yeah, but then there's so little.

Sometimes it's like precious And I knew, I just knew I wanted, Like Love has this dream and who knows what she'll end up doing, but she has this dream of living in New York and having a fashion line.

And I thought, God, what would it feel like if I was when I was little, if people fed that and nourished that, and I got to go walk the city streets that I thought I'd live in and whatever, And we went to a vintage shop and she picked out the most gorgeous nineteen sixties coach.

She met the shop owner and I said, love, you could wear that hair when you live here someday.

Like it's just really awesome.

And I know it's just then down to logistics, right if you're traveling in groups, and it's eight people at dinner and eight people for an uber and the four of us just travel so similarly together that we just rocked and it was awesome.

So I'm really really grateful.

I got to sit next to her doing Wicked, We got to hold hands at parts, and it just was so emotional for both of us.

I just think preserving those family trips are so important, especially as they get older, because they always want to bring a friend, and there's going to be trips where you do have friends.

But like we just went to Gallenburg after Christmas, Me and the kids, Nick met us for like a day, but like, no friends, we're not, We're and it's the most we've connected in a very long time because it just gets so busy.

Like those core family trips are absolutely my favorite memories, favorite moments, even if they're fighting the whole time.

It doesn't even matter, you know, like it's just I would always preserve those as much as you can.

Yeah.

I was really proud of myself because I feel.

Like I try to accommodate sometimes and I can get swayed a little by Preston, and I really dug my heels in and I was like, I know what I know, and I and I don't want to people please our way out of this just so that other people can feel like they had a great trip.

And I feel really proud that I did that because it was so special.

And then it was great to be able to fun go.

We flew to Tampa to see other half of the duo and they wanted to celebrate her, and so that was fun because she got to have her friends there, you know.

But I didn't see her there for literally like three days.

Yeah, she's just hanging.

Well and tricky.

Just this is such an interesting topic to me because how tricky is it that you have to think of other people when you're traveling with them, no matter who it is, if it's other family, when it's just y'all, you can do what you want.

You don't have to worry about what everybody else wants to do and making them happy, and you truly get to do what you want to do.

Like we had no reservations.

The day we got there, we were out on Times Square to almost like eleven thirty at night, like it would do whatever you want.

Yeah.

The next day we just did what we wanted to do in the order we wanted to do it.

And there was a couple things we had times for, like Wicked and a museum of ice cream.

Other than that, we just did what we wanted and it was awesome.

That's so cool.

It was great.

I want to do I love family memories like that.

It was really good.

I feel proud of us.

That's what you remember as a kid, you know.

Yeah.

Yeah, and we didn't vacation as a family.

We did one, I think.

Yeah, So it was really it's really great.

I feel really thankful.

But I really did miss you girls.

It's weird.

I feel like I haven't seen you in ten years.

I know, like you've lived a whole life this last week.

So did you watch the Golden Globes?

So I didn't.

I haven't watched in a really life time, if I'm being honest.

I saw a lot of clips.

So I saw Carrie, I saw as JP's acceptance of her Carol Burnett Award, and it just brought me to tears between her and Kristin Davis.

That was really that was really cool.

I watch I scanned for fashion.

I did it always.

You know, I was talking to another actor friend of mine that was also in One Tree Hill, and you know, he was saying as well that I asked him.

I was like, oh, you watch the Golden Globes and he goes, no, He's like, honestly depresses me.

Is it rhyme with Boston this friend?

Maybe we're all doing the math really cracky, we're Tosston.

But yeah, it was just one of those where I'm like, dude, I get it.

Like it's yeah, I feel the same way because it's such an an elite group and but there and it's like you want to be there and you want to have that you know that that hit show, and you want to be recognized for work, and then it's that, well I ever get there, and that feeling.

Is this is why Preston does not watch musicals.

A lot of people same with music award shows, Yeah, for sure, and so but I and I did watch At this point, I'm just like, you know, happy for you know, just just to watch and see it.

I honestly have not seen any of the movies, so.

That's usually why I don't watch it, because I'm like, you can never see the movies that are up.

Yeah, I would like to.

I'd like to see the Leo movie, but no, I haven't seen it.

I honestly I love NICKI so watching her opening monologue, I thought she was hilarious.

What she did with Leo was so funny.

But yeah, I just I thought that was that was, you know, good.

I didn't know.

I I love seeing Julia Roberts.

I do too, and I do Okay, she is classic, didn't.

She talk like a long time or something.

She's also just funny, but I love it.

I'm like, you're Julia Roberts.

Do you get to what you want?

I get to do whatever you want.

It's wild because so we were kind of talking about this over the weekend, how so many actresses are starting to people in general, probably maybe more so in our Nashville orbit than others, but say that again, sorry, how everyone's starting to look alike by the injections.

Interesting.

What I noticed about her though, is that I could see her wrinkles.

Beautiful and she looks like herself.

Yes, she is so pretty.

Something I also admire very much about Sarah Jessica Parker just this ability to and I noted it for myself because I've talked often about like wanting to get a nose job, and.

Do we want everyone's noses to look the same.

Well, that's just it.

Like they're so iconic and they're still stunning, and they've just very much you're never confused at who you're looking at or what you know.

And have you seen Kate Winslet's video that's been going around.

It's beautiful.

She she says it so beautifully and I'm going to butcher it, but you know, she hasn't done anything to her face.

And she's like, I want to be the role model to younger kids.

She's like, I want to look like myself.

I want my face to move.

I wanted to show, you know, the my age and like the highs and the lows and like, this is my face.

And and she's like, and I look up to the that that don't that look like me too, you know?

And she's like, this is beautiful.

And I think our concept of what beauty looks like has in our age.

Yes, our group yeah, has been botox fillers, you know.

Yeah.

And I also there's an aspect of celebrity that they keep that I love too.

I don't know what Sarah Jesica Parker had for breakfast this morning, and I like that.

There's just something about them being this untouchable kind of celebrity that still makes them fascinating and like brings out the little kid in me when I watch them.

So it was just interesting to kind of like take note as I'm always kind of hard on myself, and I thought, well, there's SJP with crow's feet in the same nose and she's still stunning to me, and her language is so articulate, and I just I don't know, you see Julia and she looks just like she did.

I don't even know how many years ago pretty woman was, but yeah.

But she's still aged and looks beautiful.

Yeah, I mean, it's like I don't I mean, I don't know how much she does to herself.

I don't know if she does a lot, but but she is her.

But she's still her.

She looks like her.

She hasn't completely you know, she doesn't look like a different person.

That's where she have a frozen forehead.

Yeah, Like if that's what I notice first, yeah, okay, I might just keep frozen forehead.

But that's is the first thing that I personally see in an older women or actress, and like, if your forehead isn't moving, it's like nothing against that in the slightest.

Like, obviously I've done botox in the past.

I'm not saying I'm not going to in the future.

I don't know where I'm right now.

It's it's a no do I look in the mirror and go ooh, yeah, but I'm also okay with it right now.

Right But when I do.

See actors actresses that have you know, the frozen it does kind of draw me away.

It does, Yeah, you need the emotion.

It's like it just feels like there's not emotion.

Yeah, And then when you see the lip filler with it.

And again I'm not trying to sound like do what you want.

To do, it's just like, well, it does start to.

Don't I want?

I like the Kate Winslet.

Look.

I went to an.

Influencer event here recently, and within the last I would say like five or six month and I had this like really eerie feeling when I walked up.

I've just like they all kind of spun around, and so many women looked the same because of the injections are all getting in, and I thought, this is such a strange feeling, you know, and they're all gorgeous, but also like where's our individuality?

A little bit?

It's tricky, so I don't know's I just know she didn't know I gave you.

I just wonder what are because we're in the era the forties thirties, I know a lot of twenty year olds that are doing the lip stuff.

But where our daughters will be in.

That because I feel like also cycle, I mean thing cycle, so it may go the other way, like you never know.

Like I even was asking the girl that did my botox or disport or whatever the other day about under day.

I did, yeah, and I only do it.

I get dispoor and I only do a little so you can still I mean I still have like movement and stuff.

But yes I did it after not doing it for a while.

And yeah, but I asked her about like the the darkscles under eye and just different things, and I was like well, it's like I would never want to do filler.

She's like, I hardly ever do filler anymore.

She was like the people I used to do filler on like they're not doing it really anymore.

And I'm like interesting, So I was like, maybe it will kind of you know, work itself out.

A little bit, like I maybe it will.

I haven't done lips in forever, so I'm.

Saying it's like it's like the skinny, Like everyone want to be really really skinny.

Well, no one wants to be really really skinny anymore.

They want the butt, they want the Kardashian you know whatever.

It is like, I think things ebb and flow a lot.

So it'll be interesting to see, like is it going to be not cool to have a frozen forehead you know, in a couple of years and like have you know, you just never know?

Could right, It'll be interesting.

It was just wild.

I saw my aunt post this picture of her family at over Christmas, and it's so cool to look like I.

Belong with them.

Yeah.

Yeah, And that was the moment I was like, well, if I took this nose away, you know, then I it's because they all look I look, they look like my family if you saw them.

The noses, I feel like, are a big part of that.

Like there's one girl on one of the housewives I won't say, and I love her and I think she's stunning.

I think she's beautiful, but she just does not look like what she used to look like at all, and a lot of it is the nose.

And I'm like, I understand why she felt I'm not saying it wasn't beautiful, but like, I understand why she felt uncomfortable or whatever it was, and why she wanted to make changes.

And I'm like, you're stunning, but you don't look like you.

Yeah, you probably you don't.

You don't.

You're a different looking person.

And they may love that, and that's fine, and that's for them.

That would be hard for me when you start doing all the things and the nose and that, and then you don't even look like how you did a couple of years.

You know that, that would just be really hard for me.

I think we're recognizing myself about.

Whitney from real lives of Mormon wives.

Don't.

I can't figure her.

I can't figure that with yes, I can't figure that one I.

Was like blown away I wouldn't have recognized that that was her.

You don't think it was just wait, No, something in her face is so different, and listen, she's I've always thought she was really beautiful, and I think she's beautiful now.

But there's something she's.

So I thought that too, but I had not watched the third season.

And then I watched the third season, and you can slowly see it changing, and I do now think the majority of it was just wait, you do.

And I didn't think that at first because it was so drastically different.

There are something other thing, probably some filler or botox or something.

But to me now as you watch her losing weight through the season just a little bit gradually, and then where she's at now, to me, the majority absolutely feels like she just lost a lot of weight in her face.

I guess we.

Don't know her not pregnant either, at least I don't, right.

I have a question.

And this is just me being like Devil's advocate, and we're not those girls to talk about other people's like faces and wait or what they've gotten done.

It's not coming off in like a judge way, is it that were?

I don't think so, so I just I think that we've lost the art of like really and I have like I'm just taking accountability for like.

And I was thinking that same thing.

And I truly don't think that we are being I think we're very because again, no stunning.

You know, everyone I'm talking about or.

Thinking about I actually think are like the most beautiful people in the So I hope it doesn't come off that way.

Like I want you to do you want to do bo talks to bow talks and foh herd isn't for me because I want to move my face when I move but or like when I act or whatever.

But yeah, it's not and the fillers of the people that are doing it, I don't want it to I don't.

I think we in a society we go what did Whitney do to her face?

Instead of she looks beautiful?

No, and I did.

I was like, that's the only thing I'm just calling out.

I'm not calling that, not even saying I'm just saying like, as a society, we fall into that trap of going what just happened here?

And I think that's where it's like, why can't we just be like this person looks beautiful?

Why do we have to say, oh, they did a GLP one or you know what I mean.

Yes, agree, it's the only thing.

That I think one of the reasons we do that.

And this is just being completely and it's not like a against I.

Love this discussion.

To me though, I looked at that and go, man, look at that, like she is.

She's such a beautiful person, always has been.

I think she is absolutely stunning.

So when I'm and when she what before whatever the before and after are I don't know, but I look at that and I go, you know, part of me, if I'm being completely honest, is like, wait, how did she do that?

You know?

And not?

And I get it, like judge, I need to do I look like my wrinkles.

When I see ninety percent of the women having a glossy, non botox forehead, there's a piece of me that's like, oh that looks so pretty.

I look old and worn because I haven't done botox.

YEP.

So that's where I think where I highlight looking at other people.

But then I draw back to well, know, like I want to believe that this is pretty too, instead of reading a comment being like, God, she looks rough because she hasn't had like that's where I think the society goes.

If you have wrinkles, you look rough, If you have a frozen forehead, you're overdoing it and you're just like trying to fit into society.

So it's like, why can't we just be like you look beautiful, you look beautiful.

Yeah, I think for me, my ownership, it's fully me saying this about myself.

I have been really hard on myself, really hard on myself, and just recently I've gone because of the Julia Roberts and the Sara Jessica Parker's and the Kate Winslet's and the Pamela Anderson.

You know, not that she didn't do something along the way, but like there's something about just owning who we are and our best versions of us and stop the comparison, comparison, the copy pasting of treatments and all of the things, Like and I have just needed to I've needed to get to this place for myself for a while.

Like, I mean, I get comments all the time like how do you sit next to Jana Kramer.

It's like she's stunning.

I mean truly.

That was part of the conversation we had about celebrities, even yesterday that you seem to get pretty as you get older.

Everyone agreed, would you like to know that?

Yeah?

No, Like our whole room was like no, Like, so it's there is something I just feel like, I know I have friends in my hometown that also are doing this game, and it's just not fair to any of us.

Like it's okay to do what makes you feel good, which is kind of our motto always I think is a try all of a sudden, like I got boobs, Like I can't say anything against plastic surgery.

You want to get your nose and get your nose done, you know what I mean?

Yeah, no, I've lived, moved do that, but yeah, you know sure got them done.

Yeah, I just I and I don't.

I just admire greatly the women that can stand in the skin that they were given and just go because I there's been times where I don't know if I can even do that, you know.

But I think you can say that and say I feel like I admire people who don't do these things to themselves, and that does not mean we're judging the people that do.

Yeah, I think I'm still a person that I think I'm just highly more like I because I all get the comments of like, oh, she looks for off for this or what is or what is she doing blah instead of you know, going like when we when the Whitney thing came up, it's like, why can't we just became that being like what did she do?

Instead of you know, I don't know, I just like it's the conversation of highlighting something when it's just why is that a conversation?

But I see what you're saying, Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, it's just gets a societal question, yeah, which I don't know.

And it kind of always has been.

Do you just remember it wasn't social media driven.

I remember flipping through magazines when we were young and it would be like, oh, so and so steps out for the first time, but it was like a paper printed article and were keeping up in real time with what these people are doing whatever.

Right, Yeah, it's but it's it goes back to even the weight things too, like if they had a little bit of a bump, she must be pregnant or maybe she just a little bit like I've always had a little poach.

Yeah, well pre you know, yeah, testosterones really helped.

Oh good, I was like pre what I've always liked.

But I mean like I've I've never once I did a gut cleanse and like testosterone, working out and change eating habits a little bit.

I don't have that bloat anymore.

It's wild.

Yeah.

Good.

Anyways, I love women.

I just want to say that.

I really just I wasn't going yeah, I just really love like, I just think women are really truly so beautiful.

And I'm just really proud of us for whatever way.

We're navigating it, because we while into the trap of going what did she do?

I do want to know what she did?

So still she's stunning.

Anything to whine about it, ladies, Oh man, I can, but I want you to Catherine take it away.

I don't.

I know.

I'm pinnion mine because I have to get my hormones in check.

This is a real tricky week for me to navigate.

Me very good is just not very kind of boring.

That's okay, what do you got kick and bore it.

Let's see it.

We'll take it over your the spice department.

What do you got kick?

Okay?

So obviously I was like running a little bit late today and we've talked about this because you've changed doctors, like in the past, like pediatricians, right, yes, I have.

Yeah, So my complaint today is about my doctor, my daughter.

My doctor's appointment with my daughter today.

Did you go to the one that I used to go to?

Yes, Okay, we have left that, which I still like her.

Okay, I'm gonna I'm gonna say I still like her.

But I just was just really frustrated today because it's.

What vaccine did she push on you?

Well, I had already decided to do and we've on board it.

Yeah, I've already decided to do this vaccine.

So and that's you and we can talk about that.

That's fine.

I know it's a very controversial one and I have gone back and forth part of it.

Yeah, this is part of But I did decide to get Caden the HPV vaccine after he was fifteen, so he had to do three doses of it, which was unfortunate because they're pretty uncomfortable, like they hurt a good bit.

So we had already done the three and I you know, i'd gone back and forth on how I felt about it, you know, all the things.

But she had definitely, like had she had been the one who had convinced me, even though she's not Caden's doctor.

Caden's doctor is in the practice, but not the same doctor she had already kind of not guilt tripped me, but.

You told her that like your child got in your infection because I didn't give him a vaccination.

On board.

And this is where the comment section really spices that.

This is why I was like, well, I'll talk about this because I say that wasn't even guilt me for not knowing what vaccine.

And I know you were a doctor, and that's fine.

The doctors will remember there, They're like they they're knowledge, they have all the knowledge.

I okay, fine, and I want more time and.

I still just need as I get well, that's the hard part and that's part of like my frustration is like, you know, I gave it more time with Caden, but then since it was after fifteen, which how does that make sense?

I need someone to explain to me why a fifteen is just this magical age they've decided now you have to have three shots instead of two.

That makes no sense to me.

That's stupid, right, But.

I was already waiting because I knew this was the one because she's fourteen where we were probably gonna have to do gardasil.

But we walk in and they have the little finger prick thing, and she is deathly afraid as a fourteen year old of this freaking finger prick, which she has had to do two or three times, because about a year and a half ago, I was worried that she had leukemia.

It was like a whole thing, yes, and it was like traumatized by it.

Right, So we did a full CBC and her white blood cell count was a little low, but everything else looked fine.

They weren't concerned.

So then we reran it.

It was still a little low, but they still weren't concerned.

It ended up that it was not bruises on her body that scared me.

Ended up being like an acid burn from a lime.

Interesting, look that up.

That's a whole other thing.

But I've always been slightly worried about her white blood cell count.

So when we go in today, I wasn't going to ask for it because I know Emmy was just like traumatized by these two finger pricks.

But I was like, I won't ask.

I think everything's probably fine, she hasn't been sick, you know whatever.

But the right when we walk.

In, the little finger prick thing is just sitting there.

So she's like anxious the whole time, right, and then they want to do like the whole depression and anxiety thing, and she's over here all she can think about.

It's like it's like, well, she's very anxious right now.

Yeah, But anyway, so they do they do the thing.

I mean, she immediately starts crying before she even gets it.

It's not even when she gets it.

It's like the anxiety leading up to it, but she gets the prick.

I guess.

No, it's very syndrome all this.

I mean, she gets like bawling before it even and then she let me gets it that She's like, it's not bad, but she's like bawling, you know, and I'm like, okay, so it's like it doesn't hurt.

She's like before here, yeah, but of course.

She cried for like thirty minutes after, but it's fine anyway.

So I'm like, in the back of my head, I was like, she really needs to take this artistical shot today because she cannot take three, Like I cannot make her take three, so I have got to like make that.

So honestly, the pressure was more myself.

I knew that she would add that third one for some reason hurts even more like Kayden said, they progressively hurt more like even Kayden like hurt for a while.

So anyway, so she whatever, and I'm like, Okay, godnessil's going to come up.

We're just going to do this.

It's going to be fine, right.

Well, then she comes in and she's like, okay, so something's like weird with the CBC and I'm like, oh, it's her white blood cell count low again, and she's like, no, remind me of what.

And I was like, I remember, we went through all this blah blah.

So it's back up, thank thank god.

But something else had flagged.

And she sits there and she's like, I mean, I'm not worried about it, but if you're worried about it.

We should rerun it.

And I was like, I don't know what to be worried about.

I don't know correct what you're even saying.

Yeah, Like she's like, the white blood cell is normal range, it's fine, but these something that starts with an M is flagging.

And I'm like, I don't know what that means.

And so she give you like any sort of because sometimes they'll say which could sometimes be, she said.

She said it could.

Mean that maybe she's like starting to fight off like a viral infection, which is what they say for the CBC all the time, because that is kind of a marker for like a viral whatever.

Sure, but I'm like, once again, this tells me nothing.

So she says it again, and she's like and I'm like just sitting there, and she's like, if you're worried, and I'm like, well, now I'm worried.

I'm not not worried, right, I'm like, well.

Now, yeah, I'm worried because you're sitting here saying well, you're worried.

And I'm like talking in front of someone who fully understands what we're saying.

It already is sweating.

Exactly, even though she apparently had tuned out this entire conversation because I had to like restaring needle that will yet there.

But it's like you know when you get blood work and it's like, oh, you probably just were coming down with a little cold right before, right, is normally what like he would say like you're fine, right, It's where it's like not cause for alarm, right right, which is what we need.

Right then our heads go too, well, what should we be worried?

But she kind of started that way.

She's like, I'm not worried, but if you're worried, and I'm like and then she said that twice and I was like, well, now I'm worried, so I guess we're gonna run it again.

Yeah, and she's like I could just be the machine whatever, and I'm like how, but okay, okay, that's fine.

So Emmy has tuned this all out because she's actually filling out like a form or whatever.

So then I'm like, she's like, so, what's happening?

And I was like, well, did you not hear that conversation?

She's like no, and I was like, well, we're a little worried about flagging, which doesn't worry her.

She's like, okay, so I'm sick, you know whatever, but we're going to have to do it again.

So she starts bawling again.

So we had to redo the thing anyway, and then we took the Garda soil shot.

It was all like a whole traumatic experience, but that was just my complaint.

I'm like, don't, like, I need some more confidence in this, and I understand that there are questions, sure, but also don't sit me there.

And basically she was putting it on me, right, she was putting it on me to go, but if you're worried, then we'll take this.

And so I finally looked at her and I go, no, no, no, I need you to tell me if we need to retake it.

And I was just really, I was like, you need to say this worries me, or this doesn't worry me.

Let's just retake it to make sure good for you instead of yeah, instead of putting it on me.

You shouldn't have had to have even say exactly.

That's where I was frustrated.

And of course they did it again and everything came back fine.

It was the machine and everything was fine, but I'm like, I didn't have to, like, you know, put her through all of that.

Anyway, I was just like, Okay, this is where I'm getting.

And then side note to all of that, you know, they just came out with like the different vaccine stuff.

They sure did.

And literally the day before I had gotten Caden the freaking meningitis.

He had taken both meningitis vaccines, which I might still be four because meningitis is very, very like dangerous if you get meningitis.

Yeah, but I was like, are you joking me?

Like, literally the day before I had gotten him the meningitis vaccine and now they're saying we don't need it.

I'm wondering if there is a little bit of movement in the doctorhood the medical field, because when we went to our last we moved to a brick and mortar patrician kind of like they're not like by the book, But I did notice on our last two visits ago this kind of like, well, if you feel like you need it, And I'm like, is this maybe, and I'm giving them gracious assumption.

Is this their.

Reaction to this, like you have to advocate for yourself movement that everyone's having, and so that maybe they're more leaning towards us getting the care that we feel we deserve instead of being because a confident doctor can sometimes come off as disregarding You're worrying.

Well, yeah, like I remember when I brought my worries and concerns.

She laughed at me like, oh, these people on the internet, I have such misinformation.

I'm like, well, I would just like to know the information then, yeah, you know, and not to me to feel stupid that I'm looking into other research for why my six months old six month old needs all.

This right right, yeah, I'm going to read till to my doctor friend and ask her because I do feel like there's more of a movement recently, like you have to advocate for yourself.

These are the things you want to ask.

Like We've even talked to people on you know, adult education and it said like this is the blood test that you need to ask for specifically or whatever, and so.

See, that's what I need more of.

My thing is is I personally don't need someone that's like, well, whatever you want to do, Like I need some direction here.

And I am still a vaccinator.

My kids have had their vaccines.

Now we don't do flu, and we don't do COVID.

I did COVID, the kids don't, you know.

But I like, you know, I like doing my own research.

But at the same time, I do still need a doctor that's like giving me an expert.

So I followed doctor green Mom on Instagram, and I love her insight.

She's a neutral.

She's like, she's like she I always love how she entered starts her video.

She's like, Hi, you know, I'm neutral when it comes to vaccines.

If you want to vaccinate that that's wonderful.

If you don't, that's wonderful.

I'm just here to give you information.

And she's really down the middle with a lot of her stuff.

So doctor Green mom shout out to her.

So she talks about I mean, all the different vaccine vaccinations, what it means, like it's I'm sure she talks about the GARDI soole one, but she's she's great.

Yeah, and she is just factual on kind of both sides.

Yeah, And I do think for me, at least, like with vaccines and stuff, it is, I think that there are negatives to not and negatives to doing, and I just think I've just gotten to this place of what scares me more.

And listen, I'm excited that they have a new thing, Like there's no reason that a baby needs all these from my state side, you know, like you said the first first Jolie, she got them all.

Yeah.

Yeah, Like, and I've slowly changed that and I'm really glad they're seeing and changing.

And I think that is what so many people have wanted to see, that change.

And it's okay to change, Yeah, it's okay to change, Like Okay, maybe we don't need this anymore, or maybe we do, or hey, maybe it's not recommended.

But like, meningitis actually still scares me, you know, I mean, going to college and you get meningitis, Like it's still scared.

Now it's only one of them, and there's like several meningitis ones you still have, you know, you still have to get.

But anyway, that was my complaint for today.

I was like, I was already the running late and then she's like, well, you know what if you're concerned, I'm like, I need you to tell me if I'm concerned, right, yeah.

I don't know.

Yes.

Group of parents vows not to buy their seven year old cell phones until the eighth grade, then surprise them with land and then they surprise them with land lines.

I love this so much.

I actually walked into the AT and T store the other day because uh, Santa had gotten Jolie, had got Jolie a Apple Watch.

The only people she can contact on the phone is me, Alan, her stepdaddy.

I mean sorry, sorry, let me go back to that heard ad.

So yeah, so those are the people that she can talk to, and it's been really nice and she's not you know, there's no games on, there's not playing anything, but it is nice to have that, Like, for example, today she has to get off the bus, I have a meeting, and you know, I can just be like, hey, all you good because you're coming to pick her up for volleyball, you know, and so it's it's nice to have that communication with her.

But I love the landline idea.

I think it's great.

So we have one.

We love that we have the ones they're using.

Oh really, And I really want them to sponsor me because I've really spread this word far and wide.

It's called tin can phone.

Tin can phone, Okay, they are brilliant.

You can get one that looks like a tin can, or you can get just an old school regular phone.

It has to be close to a router and it runs off the internet, but it has on the app you have access to who can call it and who it can call.

They can also down nine one one from it, which I love.

And it's really neat because you said the times that they can call day and night and you can move those.

It's just very super user friendly.

And I can't tell you the feeling that comes over my whole body when the house phone rings.

Yeah.

I love that, honestly, I will.

I want to do it for the girls in the neighborhood too, because a lot of the moms were just like yeah, no, yeah, and then we obviously we can share numbers.

Yeah.

I'm wondering if you could just not do that because we actually kind of already did the birthday gift.

Oh okay, wait what.

Fine, got it?

Okay, blocked it?

Yeah, thank you, thank you two o'clock.

Okay, my ex husband already did the Jolie birthday gifts.

I just think it's sweet because they can just talk with their friends like we used to do.

What's the monthly on that?

It's like it's very low, like maybe thirteen ten dollars a month?

Right, Yeah, well great.

My ex husband cheated on me during our marriage, and now he's marrying the woman he cheated with.

We shared children in their young teen years, and he's asking me to be kind and welcoming to her for the sake of the kids.

I understand wanting peace for them, but I don't know how I'm supposed to move on when I'm expected to be friendly with the person who help break my family apart.

I don't want to fake it.

Or betray my own healing.

How do you move forward, set boundaries and protect your kids without forcing yourself into a version of co parenting harmony that feels dishonest and painful.

Oh that's tough, tough.

I this is probably not going to be a popular thing to say.

I do think though, in my mind, being kind to someone like that isn't necessarily being fake.

I think that you can keep going with that, be kind to someone out of maturity.

I think that you can be kind and loving it for other people and I in it not again be fake or be messing up your healing if you have the right attitude around it.

I mean, I think that if you have the wrong attitude around it, like I feel like I'm being fake and that is going to mess up with your healing.

But I think that just out of just being mature.

I think that's just part of being mature sometimes unfortunately.

Yeah, And you don't have to give too much of yourself to it, like you don't have to be overly because again that's faking it.

But if you are who you are and you stand in your womans listen he cheated on you, like that's that's not your dude, then you know, and let her have the cheating husband, you know, because regardless if he can cheat on you during that flip it to that.

I promise you that new wife that crosses her mind often.

And it's not like she's getting this totally honest dude that because that right there doesn't spark.

That's not an honest guy someone that she did when you're married.

So that's what she's getting.

Is that what you want?

You know, like she's not getting this amazing great version.

Agreed, That's what I think.

Also, I will say from personal experience having this happen in my childhood, if you are too vocal about your disc taste for her and what she did to break up the family, that will filter on your kids.

And I will say, from again personal it does then cause this energy.

And I'll just say I put up a guard with my dad's x now ex wife because of it, because of what I knew, and then what I knew that my mother may have felt better.

Yep.

Well, I mean kids, don't you know, they want to side with their parents, They want to protect their parents in an odd way in those times.

So at the end of the day, you're just you're really doing it more for them.

You're doing it for them so that they don't have to hold this grudge against the other.

No, granted it was I'm not definitely by any means putting that on my mom because I didn't like how his last wife treated me regardless, you know what I mean.

So there was a piece of that, But I'm not gonna say that some of her comments didn't slip into my mind, you know, or make me taint my decision of that relationship, which I think ultimately affected my relationship with my sisters because it wasn't closely to them, you know.

And there's again, there's regretting pieces of that.

So yeah, but I'm sorry, and that sucks.

And like you're gonna you're gonna be so much happier without a cheating man.

Well, so make sure you find a perace that you can say that to someone, like it's a therapist or a really good girlfriend, because I think it's part of it is just holding it in and not knowing to do with all those feelings.

It's like, ugh, greed, Well, I'm glad we're all back three together, ladies.

Oh I missed you girls.

Welcome back.

Couldn't be happier

Right,