All right, we in there.

Hey, dude, you hear no what?

No, I'm saying.

I'm talking to the people.

Did they hear that?

I'm so hood right now?

Politics?

So hood.

I'm a little rusty.

Oh my gosh, Ladies and gentlemen, I'm so rusty.

Guess who's here?

Yep, Merry Christmas.

Christmas edition of Hood Politics podcast.

We have actually the co founder the origins of this whole story.

Refer to her by her prefix introduced to some Some of y'all may know that a original Red Couch podcast where the Hood Politics came from.

Ladies and gentlemen, my wife, doctor Almazara Gosa Petty A.

Hey, I'm back, see back in the building.

Man.

Listen.

It's been this whole season ever since I joined the iHeart family.

The olg ain't been on the show.

No, I have not.

It's also been like a whole ass pandemics.

So there's that, you know.

Yeah, we uh but I'm excited.

Yeah, it's been so long.

Some of y'all been asking, y'all where the Red Couch at, And I'm like, were busy and she had other things she was doing.

Yeah, I was writing a book.

This full wrote a book.

Only coming out of that cave I put myself into so that I could finish.

Yeah, spurting.

Yeah again for some of I that don't know if some of y'all movies, how herd Politics came about was my wife and I doctor Alma.

We had a podcast called the Red Couch Podcast, and it was broken up into four sections, so there's like twenty minute segments.

The first segment was hood politics, and then then the next section, what do we do?

Like like, uh, what's the other one?

We had How's your Heart?

I remember that because.

Hey, how's your heart?

Yeah?

We had almost vocab lists.

Yeah, so what was it?

We had some sort of like pop culture thing.

Yeah.

The other one was just pop culture silliness.

Yeah.

Then we did a justice part where it was just like we just talked about justice issues, and then we ended with hey, how's your heart?

And we had almost vocabulist.

So but her Politics just took on its own life, right, and that's how you guys have got to this speed, which is what you're listening to right now.

So we figured for this Christmas episode we would do something special, a little more Red Couch style.

Yeah, I'm saying where the doc chimes in and usually the doc has incredible gems and big words, and once we get her started, you know what I'm saying, like she'd be giving us, giving us the heat rocks of things that like you got, I know a lot of times, like you know, people say that the way I break things down, you know, is what they like.

But my source materials her.

She's the actual academic and I'm just a better communicator.

You don't talking about Okay, I don't know.

I'll just play it anyway, clean up, thank thank you.

So today what we want to do is this is we want to do a red couch slash for the Politics Combined Guide to surviving a Christmas Holiday meal at either a Black or Mexican house.

Yes, some Blaxicans Christmas, some Black skin hood Christmas.

Because there are some rules that aren't true for every culture.

We just figure let's do some fun uh here at the Almaganda Home the Hood Politics Podcast Family.

We just want to give y'all some gems of how to survive Christmas in our hoods.

So how it's gonna go is I'm gonna give you a couple points, a couple of pointers about if you're pulling up to a Black family.

Now a couple disclaimers on this.

I am from the West, Okay, so there are some variations.

You know, there's some regional differences.

Like at my house, we'll get into this, but when you're pulling up to my house, it's Dominoes, it's not spades.

And that's actually a very important notice.

I think I've come to the conclusion that like Dominoes is like Texas and Cali, Texas and West because I feel like everybody else, like they play spades, you know, from the Midwest, you know, Chicago, East, my mom's family, you know, they from DC.

That's it's all card games, but they play something called tunk I know, Jim Rummy, you know what I'm saying.

And then they play space that's they faced card games.

Yeah.

Yeah, for us though, it's I'll hear my father's from Texas and then you know that he's the side of the family that migrated to Cali, which is why I'm a Cali boy, which is why I played Dominoes.

And my family that's out here it is Domino's, you know.

Yeah, So that's that's one of the nuances.

That's that's a little different.

You know what I'm saying, obviously, there ain't no snow where we are, so the weather's a different story, you know what I'm saying, what the neighborhood, the whole neighborhood looks like.

So so one of my caveats is, like I'm talking specifically about where a West Coast family, and there are some variations and you may have to adjust accordingly.

And I think there's some caveats for you too.

There are there are.

I'm I'm a daughter of immigrants, so i didn't grow up very you know in the Chicano Chicana kind of sphere.

I'm more of an outsider, I feel like, even to that.

So it's a little different than the more like Chicano household, which I think would have a lot of similarities, you know with some of the things that I'm things that I'm going to talk about, and then also things that I know, you know, like we often joke about being on people of color time, which you know, that's just a cross that's going to be that was just across Harry.

Yeah.

So yeah, so I think that's the caveat, you know, like I'm obviously not speaking for all of the Latino community in that I have a very specific you know, intersections of who I am, and you know, sometimes to it like we don't know what the blending of like the hood versus like the family thing is right, And so I can't say that this is like bonafide what you're gonna expect in every single Latino household.

But they're pretty like they're pretty it's a pretty ed strong.

Yes, you can't go wrong if you stick to these.

Yeah, and some of them are real problematic, but we'll talk about that.

We'll talk about that.

Yeah.

So, like I said, so for for the Black Guide, again, I'm from Cali, so this is very West coast uh and with with some Southern roots, but we are not a Southern family.

We're not an Eastern family.

We're not a Midwest family.

We're very specifically this.

And then for doctor Alma, she is Mexican.

That's not Salvadorian.

That's not a guate of Moland.

Dominicans not Dominican, you know what I'm saying.

And she's first gen.

So these are not we're not she's they're not Cholos like this ain't they're not Vathos.

This ain't Chicano, which is very different, which is the which is funny if you know our backstory, that's what I grew up with.

I grew up with I realize now I grew up with Chicanos.

So some of the stuff that I thought I was supposed to do.

When I met her family, they was looking at me like the hell is he doing?

I was like, wait, what, Yes, we're very much traditional in some senses because our proximity to like, you know, our country, home country is much more you know, it's much more existent, and so that we just kind of have like ways that we do, like things very traditional.

So yeah, ain't no lowriders.

That's some gender.

And that's what I mean, like like like gendered.

She this one, which which did not continue in our family.

My wife did not continue some of these traditions.

No should I should?

I go ahead?

You want to go first?

I mean we can.

We can take turns you okay?

Were you done with the dominoes one?

Though?

No?

Give dominoes just like it's just an example.

Oh yeah, I got a rule for that though, So do you want to start with that?

Sure?

All right?

So well now I think maybe we should go chronologically.

So I think, uh, you already brought up like when this thing is going to start.

So the time thing, you're gonna be given a time to be there, yes, which is probably two to three hours earlier than everybody expects you because they know everybody's gonna be late.

So that's that's gonna be.

That's gonna be real.

Like if somebody say, hey, we haven't dinner at two, they haven't dinner at four because they know you're not gonna.

Get Yeah, I make sure you get that snack in because you're gonna be really hungry when you get there.

To get there at too, and just don't get there because you're gonna start setting up at least in you know, our Mexican in my family, Like you're gonna start setting up at that time.

Yeah, what we mean is I'm gonna start getting stuff ready for this party at two.

Yeah, if you there, you buy your elf, come through to help me or don't come.

That's pretty similar because I'm like, fools, ain't dressed.

We're not even dressed yet, you know what I'm saying, And like, could nobody expect you?

They still vacuum in and if you're gonna show up, I know and yeah, exactly I know it With black folks if you're gonna show up at that time, you you better be here to help.

Then somebody gonna hand you a mop.

You're gonna get a broom.

You gonna be sent to the store.

He Hey, hey, baby, Hey, who who your little friend?

How you do it?

Hey?

Run to the store right yet, get us some ice?

So you're gonna you're gonna be running errands.

Yeah, if you're gonna show up, you're gonna show up like that.

Yep.

Do you do you'all have, like because I think this is distinctly I think in the Latino community something that happens a lot.

Do you y'all have like a bunch of different excuses that y'all give when people are trying to ask you to like what time you're getting there?

And do y'all do that?

For instance, like no, if someone if like there's a there's they're expecting you, right and someone's coming by to pick you up, you almost know to lie, Like you should definitely just say yeah, you're ready, even though you're not, because you know that by the time if you say you're ready, then at least they'll start getting ready to come get you.

Then they'll come get you.

Oh yeah, on my way.

Yeah, so yeah, yeah, I almost I'm almost there.

Really means oh thanks for calling me, man, Now I know to get up and get ready, better go get you.

That's that's just in general.

Yeah, like you tell somebody hey, hey when they say they on their way or they around the corner, corner the car okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's yeah, y'all just getting in the car.

That's communal.

That's yeah, apparently that's intersection happen they just got in a car.

Yeah, that's superherritading.

Okay, So for now, Christmas in a black family, Rule number one, like like we said, is like probably not gonna start on time.

But at the same time, it's a weird balance because at the same time, you still got to respect the house and not show up so late.

Yeah, and then expect to get Like if if Grandma say we sit down to eat, really we eat when Grandma's ready.

Okay, you know what I'm saying.

That's that's really what we eating.

Yeah, well mama or grandmam already.

But one thing with us is like you can't show up empty handed.

And now there's a few caveats on that which would roll into like ru rule number two, point five two point seven is if nobody asked you to cook something, do not bring your grandma's favorite dish.

Do not bring your mom's secret casse role.

Like, listen, we are very serious about our music.

Every cook has been vetted.

You know what I'm saying.

Like, if you wasn't asked to cook nothing, don't bring.

And if you do, let me tell you something right now, no one's eating it.

It's gonna say you're gonna be gonna bring it in foil and you're gonna bring it full right back out.

If nobody asked you to cook something, that stuff is handpicked, it's vetted over years and years of experience.

Yeah, nobody asked you to cook something, don't bring something now, But don't come empty handed.

You better come with some sodas, Come with some drink, Come with a plate, knives and forks, uh, some flowers.

Something that's like showing napkins, something that's showing you, not just you're not just here to receive that, you're here to give.

Now.

If you show up again, let me about to tell you.

I can stress this.

I ca stress.

If you show up with some unrequested.

Food, it's gonna go right back with you.

It's going right back with you and somebody gonna start drisking.

What you're saying is I should show up with some food that I really just want to keep for myself.

And that way I can they gonna talk about you then get made fun of.

They gonna talk about you, all right, So your turn when you walk in the door.

So the reason why I feel like it's a small prace to pay is because you just need to.

You just gotta expect that you will be roasted.

Like in our house, yes, no, in our house and the Tino like household where all the theists get together and y'all decked out to the nines.

Even though y'all just go and send around in the living room and just kind of like talk to each other.

Dress up.

Oh yeah, we dress up, even if we're just gonna send the living room.

That's okay, that's okay.

Come looking good, yes, come looking good.

And also just get ready to get roasted by one of your theists.

Somebody, one of the theats or theos is gonna usually a thea is gonna have something to say about some the way that you look just someway in some way.

That's why I'm like, oh, I'm okay with getting you know, I'm used to getting roasted every time we get together.

It was like, oh yeah, almost.

She ain't got no job.

She's still in school.

When I was younger and still in grad school is like, yeah, she don't really want to get a job.

That's why she can school.

Now, Oh my waye, you ain't got a.

Job getting a PhD.

They just didn't get that, you know.

It's like, hey, wait, so you finished school.

I was the lazy one at.

WHOA with three grand friends graduate degrees.

I no jobs.

Yeah, what are you doing with your life?

You got no kids and no jobs?

Who's with you?

Yeah?

That's hilarious.

Yo, Okay, that's another similarity.

You're gonna get.

You're gonna get.

You better come in with with a thick skin, be able to laugh because they gonna roast you.

Now with us, it's like, here's this, but them roasting you is that's proof that they've accepted you and we like you.

If you're ignored, If nobody say nothing to you, if nobody's like everybody just being real nice, nobody saying nothing to you, you're not family.

Niggas don't love you.

Worry, worry if nobody if you that's the what black people.

The worst thing you can be is left alone.

If they just leave you alone, nigga, you don't matter.

They ain't even thinking about you.

Ain't nobody even thinking about you.

I'm saying you not really one of us.

You get Look, so remember we talked about this before, about like the way that like black people roast their kids, we like very everyone and and and I think that's something that people got to understand, is like even about just like why we don't even talk about bullies a lot, is because like mom.

Yeah, why why you even gained bullied?

You don't even say you gained bullied.

Because you don't even know that because we don't even know.

That's what it is.

Like you sound like my auntie, you know what I'm saying.

So to me, it's like and and and what's crazy is like none of these boys, none of these kids in school, is funnier than like your your uncle Mumpsey or like Noney or they're gonna roast you and it's hilarious.

So your side hurts because it's so funny.

But the other thing is like nobody is specifically targeted, so that's why it doesn't feel like bullying.

Equal opportunity, egalitarian.

Everybody can get it everyone.

Yeah, the only the only different is the age thing is like you have to kind of there is a line.

You got a cross with an elder that like none of the grandma generation, you're not allowed to say nothing to them.

You know what I'm saying.

If it's can't be touched, they are untouchable.

Yeah, you can't touch them.

Now.

You may have aunties and uncles who are kind of young.

The ones that are on the younger side, you could clap back.

The ones that are on the older side, like your mom's oldest sister, you gotta leave her alone, yo said.

But the younger ones and the cousins, Oh, it's going down.

So yeah, so that's that's another similar reaity.

You're gonna get roasted, and you just add if you cry, it's worse.

Yeah, look, don't cry.

Okay, yeah, okay, yeah, look we drag you because we look.

Society's gonna treat you like this.

Let's go ahead and get you started.

Give you some cliff notes.

Yup, yup.

You better have a clapbacker when they do it at school.

That's why It's funny for us in school too, when foods are roasted each other.

It's like, I sow, good man, you ain't worse than my mom my mom yet.

Okay, so you're gonna get roasted.

So what I don't know if you're crying, if I your laugh.

Right now, that's interesting about having to dress up, Like, yeah, so you you got yourself for us, that's a Southern thing.

We don't have to dress up.

You got to dress up because everyone's gonna be looking at you and have something to say about it too.

So you got to make sure you're.

Like, you know, we go to your sister's house, I'd be like, damn it cleaned up because you used to look at me like you weren't that.

And I'm like, oh yeah, I'm not dressed up all right, so CPT time color people time.

Uh, don't come empty handed.

You're gonna get roasted.

You're gonna get roasted.

You better dress up good.

You want to a Latino house for us?

Now, once you're in the door, you came at a decent time.

You had some food for somebody.

You have to for us find the host of the house, like whoever's house this is that person must be greeted, like, that's the cardinal rule you when when you leave in, when you're coming in, when you leave it, you have to greet that person specifically.

Everybody else you could dap up whatever by being polite, but specifically you need to look them in the face, from the youngest to the oldest.

When you walk in with your child, Hey, say hi, say hi to on Stephanie.

You high on Stephanie.

You gotta give her because it's her house.

Thank You have to greet the host of the house.

Yeah, that's a little different for in the Latino communities.

You gotta say hi to everyone and hug and kiss everybody.

Everyone, everybody, even the weird uncle, even like anybody, which if you know me, I was talking about my uncle.

I was talking about like I did not want to do that, and ergo, I don't make my children do that.

That's a whole other story.

But yeah, you have to give everybody in there a hello, a hug, a kiss, acknowledgment, you know everyone, and when you're leaving too, like you just cannot come into a house without being you know, green everything, every person, every so you know, it's usually like about a good depending on how many people are already there.

It could take a good half hour before you settle in because you gotta go and say hi to everybody first, you know, give them their hugs or kisses.

And at the end too, it might take an hour to say about everybody at that point.

That's crazy, what you would that's dang.

You got agree everybody?

The only the only one that you absolutely have to agree the host.

That's the host right now.

If you got any sense, you gonna most a lot of times there's a room where like grandma and her friends are usually Grandma's like for It depends.

It depends on like how spry your grandma is.

Sometimes she's already sitting.

At the table she ain't gonna get up, yeah nope.

Or she's like she has her spot yeah, and you know everybody buzzing around her.

So you go, yes, your grandma, you go give her a kiss.

You know what I'm saying.

Maybe peeking a room where like other uncles or something like hey it's o nephew.

You know what I'm saying.

You keep going, but I don't have to like go in there unless they say, hey, nephew, come here, come here.

That mean maybe drinking by that time, come here, what you got your little girlfriend?

Hey?

Hey, hey, hey, nephew, keep him a cute little girlfriend you bring around?

Where's she at?

Yeah?

She had a pretty dump day, you remember that one last year?

Pretty where she at?

Like my current one is here.

Well, my wife is here.

Yeah.

So okay, so you ain't got to greet everybody with us.

You gott to greet them.

Then we got greed.

Now I will say this like leaving is yeah drama.

Yeah.

I think I think y'all beat us in that.

Oh god, yeah, yeah, I don't think there's the y'all y'all champions in that.

In that sense, it's impossible.

Yeah, y'all take forever.

It's all bad, you're right, Yeah, because Mama gonna start a new conversation.

There's the like, all right, okay, baby, come on, tell your cousins by so then you're like, all right, y'all, but you know not to really tell them by y'all hour.

Yeah you know what I'm saying.

Okay, mom, even you got like an hour to play, Yeah, you got another hour, you know, because she's gonna start a conversation while she in the while she in the kitchen, wrapping up food now, which is it goes back to rule number two.

She's only wrapping up food because we brought food.

They got she wasn't supposed to bring her No, no, no, no.

If you know, if you didn't bring anything, you can't take no plate home.

Oh okay, uh huh oh yeah yeah that's different.

No no, no, no, no, no, you can't wait you what you getting that foiled out for?

What did you bring?

Like?

No, you can't take food home.

You ain't bringing them.

That's like, no, you tripping.

Yeah, unless somebody offers lets they say, hey, you want to take some of this home?

Because they trying to get rid of it.

See, we always trying to get rid of it because the amount of cooking in a Latino party, it's ridiculous.

It's a lot of food.

I ain't we have so much food and don't and don't turn down nobody's food that they bring.

They just get an equal place at the table, yes, you know, at the buffet table.

It's like yes, the more the merrier, you know, So you're gonna get like a plate, you could get several plates when you leave.

You have to, yeah, because then that's rude.

You like leaving the host with all this food that they made.

For some reason, there is a little bit of like, okay, if you this is this is a this is now, this is a nuanced one.

If you brought like if you didn't bring food, but you brought soda and you want to take your soda back home with you, that's look down on, Like you can't be like, hey, we're that ginger ale I brought that ginger.

I'm gonna take it back with me.

It's like that's just cheap.

Why are you gonna do that?

Exactly, it's like you being judged, like wait, you're going to take it back even if it's half drunk, like it's almost there, like yeah, you're gonna take it back with you.

Yeah, like you get or if you had like hey, I'm gonna take back you know what I'm saying.

Now if you want your like dish where it's like, hey, let me get my my bowl, like I brought, you know, my yams in my bowl.

Then you washed it, you found something to put it in the rest of the stuff, and you're taking your bowl back right.

But that's all happening after mom told you to go get tell your cousins by so she's still washing, she's still holding place.

Talk girl, let me tell you about it.

Then they telling stories, and then you get to the living room and she said, come on, son.

Now she started another conversation in the living room, and now at least she's holding her keys at this time.

And then then the next one is like where a jacket at?

Hey, tell your sister to go get our jackets.

So now, Nikki, you gotta go get the jackets.

And y are you still on that video game?

No, Mama, I got my shoes.

Wait while your shoes and my shoes are on, mom, right, come on now, yeah, girl, So this and then they talking.

Then there's then there's the standing in the door as another conversation.

Then there's the standing on the porch.

There's another.

Then there's the standing at the car car door open, holding your keys, and now she mad at you for taking too long.

Then I tell you, let's go get in the car.

Son.

Yeah, okay, Mom, you know what I'm saying.

And you're sitting in the car and you start looking at each other like all right, I'm gonna go say, I'm gonna go talk to you.

You just get out where you going.

Okay, Now you just but yeah, yeah, it's a good hour after.

Yeah, that's dope.

Sucks.

Yeah, in a Latino household, if if it was a success, you know, by by whether there's gonna be an after party the next day.

It's called we have like a name for it.

So the next day there's the it's called like you know, to translate it, like literally, it means reheating, a reheating party, so you reheat the food, you continue eating it.

You just come back.

So yeah, if it's been a success, that means that you had so much food, people want to eat it.

They're like, yeah, man, i'll see tomorrow, you know, yeah, you just come through.

It's like the closer people you know, to the family get invited back to just continue eating the ginormous amounts of food that has been.

That's even hap people to take stuff home.

Oh yeah, still food.

There's another after party then and say it again, what's the name of it.

It just means reheating, reheating and then come on back.

That is incredible.

Yeah, we're pretty hard.

Yeah, yeah, we're pretty hard.

That now there's that's there's something we do know, Like anybody who lived anywhere in the vicinity of the Mexican family on the holidays pretty hard, he looked.

Just I've said it many times.

Just go get a plate if you if you the black family, just go across the street going.

The reason you can get a plate it is because they made so there's so much.

They don't call the police.

They gonna be playing by the way rest in peace.

That means y'all gonna be going even harder.

It's Christmas, it's gonna be.

It's gonna be with the mustache bust handle bars playing and like double fisted Mordello's crying their eyes out to some chant.

Y'all think Drake make niggas cry, like chin't they make him cry?

Boy?

Yeah, buddy, all right, speaking of witch, what are the rules around around the drinking?

What's what's some of the what's some of the uh?

I feel so removed from that now, but because yeah, I like two years sober.

Now because yeah, I haven't been drinking.

But I mean at the party, at the parties, first of all, the men are gonna egg each other on to see who can drink more than the other, for sure, you know, it's just and then the wild theias, that's what we call the ones They ain't married and oh yeah, yeah, went to school only but never got kids or something.

So those are that's the difference between an aunt and an auntie.

Your auntie she's still young.

Like she young, she's still she got a blue tooth in her ear.

You know what I'm saying.

She was like you was probably bad in the eighties, y know what I'm saying.

Yeah, okay, anyway going.

Yeah, so those they're gonna get down to and yeah, I mean we usually had so much alcohol, even at little kids parties.

It's just part of the way that parties were had, Like it wasn't you know.

Like it's so interesting because now as an adult when I take my kids to like kids party, I'm like, oh yeah, this makes more sense.

Like kids sized food like kids sized, like kids size drinks, drinks for kids.

Yeah.

Yeah.

But in my birthdays growing up, it was like cervesas the quila, you know, Molley, like it was there was no like kids side, like you gonna eat whatever we're eating and you're not gonna drink no alcohol necessarily, but there's gonna be so much of it.

Yeah, and it's gonna be.

It's it's really really like who can hang till the real.

That's really what it becomes.

You know, like who can get so like just keep partying and not be gone but still be level headed to be at the real and still be chilling.

And not do y'all be fighting.

I don't know that I grew up your family is not like not like.

That, but I've heard that there's like, yeah, it could, it could get wild.

Now where Yeah, like I said, like I grew up with Chicanos, they be fighting.

Yeah, Like it's just and it's like and you already you could you could count the beers in to win the fight on Like y'all be fighting now with us with black people, we we don't be fighting like that, like fist fighting unless y'all like hood hood like y'all like y'all are gangs like where you guys are like multi generational gangsters or y'all be like fighting like that.

But there's something like it was interesting even out of here in La.

It's like you know you you you you bang your section, so you may you may be like Granny.

You may live near Granny or a Granny's house where where like Christmas is happening and everybody on that side of town is crips.

But you know Uncle Ray Ray moved to Inglewood, so they're all bloods, you know what I'm saying.

So like you got crips and bloods in the same house, you know what I'm saying.

But it's Granny's house, so you respect, you respect Granny said, you know your cousin, you come in, like, what's up?

Granny?

Give her a kiss?

You'd be like, it's cracking cuz your cousin be like, what's bracking?

Blood?

You know what I'm saying, or you know what it is.

You know what I'm saying.

But it's Granny's house.

Is cool.

We're gonna respect her, you know what I'm saying.

We're not gonna get down like this.

But like niggas, no like on set.

You know what I'm saying.

So, but if it but if y'all start drinking, it tru until until a nigga start drinking, you know what I'm saying, right, or until or until a dice game or Domino start playing.

What's gonna be the next thing I'm gonna talk about once because now now money's be in exchange, and when you start slamming the thing down, you're gonna say blood too many times, like what's up?

Blood?

Like you know what I'm saying, fifteen blood, Like somebody gonna be like, hey, cut, hey, lo, you gonna stop.

You're gonna stop slopping up through you know what I'm saying.

The nigg gonna be like, what a slide?

What's up?

Crab liking it?

Niggas now go Fool's gonna start doing these like derogatory terms among each other because foods is either losing money getting salty and they getting salty, or it's just you got a little few more in them then it get weird.

You know what I'm saying.

Uh, that's that.

But yeah, so for us it's like it's beers, but it's the brown liquor round round our parts.

It's that brown.

That brown will get you, you know what I'm saying.

And for our our yeah, our aunties, the aunties, which are the young ones that can get down with like get down with us.

They're they dancing, you know what I'm saying.

They drinking, they gossiping, they screaming, somebody cutting the rug at this point, if you wanted the children has been made to do a dance, you know what I'm saying.

That's suff so like y'all be partying all night.

That's the thing with like black people, it's like we tired.

It's like, hey, hey, show them how to do that new dance.

You know what I'm saying.

You gotta dance for them, you know what I'm saying.

But most of the time, you know, they gossiping, They talking about this man ain't ship, they talk about ex boyfriends.

And yes, once once the liquors start going, you feel me, and but it only gives violet.

If like Foods is losing money at.

The game table, that's understandable.

Yeah, speaking of the game table, Yeah, Latria, that's what you'll be doing.

I think Lotaria is definitely a game that's that's very much cross generations.

Like we're all gonna play, you know, but there's definitely a lot of card games and I grew up with you know, also seeing like the men play dominoes, but dominate is different than y'all dominoes.

Ours is a way of life, yeah for sure.

And number two, like speaking of which, it's either dominoes or spades, like we said before, but one of the cardinal rules about that is like if you when somebody asks if you're a guest and somebody asked, can you can you play dominoes?

Or you're not how to play spades.

They're not asking if you know the rules, they're asking are you good?

And if you are not so confident in yourself of being like, oh, I'm a mock y'all, do not sit at that table because we already said you're gonna get dragged.

That's one of the other oh.

That like it dials up the dial up because it's like, I can't believe this, like just merciless, we talk trash.

It's money up.

Listen, Okay, okay, yo, here go, here go a real oh man, drop my phone because it's getting real.

Let's just say you are somebody's if you're less like as a dude, you somebody's you, somebody's like boyfriend, Like, so you're there, but your connection to this house is a girl.

Right, let's just say yeah, or somebody else's family.

You're the guest, but specifically if it's male to females civically in our house, right, so men are gonna test you.

It's like, can you play Domino's?

Oh?

Okay, it's kind of like drinking.

Yeah, so if I know after marrying your family.

But so if you sit down and play, there's a few things that happen, Like, nigga, don't be too good, but at the same time, don't be trash because if you too good, somebody gonna be like, hey, I Like, it's the same thing in like a house party, somebody be like, hey, you start winning, y'all shooting dice, You're starting winning, you taking, you taking niggas money.

Somebody gonna be like, hey, hey, hold on, hold up, Hey, who know cut?

Hey, who are you bluod?

Like, hey, who know blood?

Who you with?

You know what I'm saying.

And if you name a female like, it's like, oh, that's not a that's not a good enough pass.

And if you name a female now now I'm like them.

If they cousins, they gonna get protective.

It's like, oh what nigga, Like, you know what I'm saying.

You here with my little cousin.

How long you've been messing with her?

What are your plans were?

Now you're getting finna get pressed because the niggas is mad that you running the domino table right yea?

Or now if you losing, they're gonna be like, at your little soft ass, your little cupcake cash.

You can't date my cousin, nigga, you on know how to play, you know what I'm saying, Like you ain't mad enough like or even worse.

This would get crazy if the family actually like her ex boyfriend, motivate like you and you pull up to the spot you out here either being trash at the game table or you being too good.

Yeah, oh yeah, yeah, they're gonna be like, hey, web, it happened.

And then they're gonna start talking around you.

Hey, you remember that boy?

You remember that Brian.

What that nigga name?

Oh yeah, Daniel, Daniel.

That nigga was dope and he was better than you, niggy.

You just gotta take it.

Speaking of toxic masculinity patriarchy.

Good Transition thinks.

There's one that's I mean, no matter where you go, I think this might be cross like like Latino communities, not just in the Mexican households.

Like, no matter where you go, there's a hierarchy of who gets to eat first and how they get to eat.

Okay, okay, okay.

So for instance, and in my household growing up Mexican, you feed the children first, Okay, okay, because they're even though they're like get clowned and you know, the theas come at them, they're also venerated, you know, and they're like, you know, they're seen as more like vulnerable and you're supposed to serve them, you know, like.

They're you standing there, You're grown, You're a grown ass person.

You standing there with the kids.

Ain't good fish?

Yeah, And then they and mainly because it just shows bad on the parent to not be doing that, because it because it's another reason to get roasted if you ain't taking care of your kids tads.

So you gotta take care of your kids, so you feed them kids first, and so if you're a parent, you better like know that you got to do that because that's another reason that your theeas will come at you.

And then once your kids eat, it's very like typical for them the wife or the girlfriend to serve the man or their boyfriend.

Yeah, mama, get on you.

If I'm the new boyfriend and you don't make plate, mama get on you.

Yes?

Is that is that also something y'all?

Hell no again, But again, I'm from the West.

It's different.

I think in the South it's.

Yeah, I've seen a lot more in the South South you write that.

Man at play you want to keep him.

That's they believe that, like that's how you keep a man is his stomach.

Yeah, you know what I'm saying.

That's very Southern.

That's very different when you marry somebody who's who's not about.

Getting the master patriarchy, which is what I did.

Well, not only that, but you don't love food like that like in Latino households, where we just be eating for fun sometimes, you know, because eating is like almost like a like a sport, like an activity because again there's way too much food, so we kind of eat it all.

Yes, But anyway, so you're supposed to serve your husband or your boyfriend first, which you know, like two or three boyfriends in I was like, all right, yeah, I'll do this.

After that, I was like, you know what, I don't like this part of my culture.

I don't know in my house you here right, Yeah, that's one of the ones that I really like buck up against that.

My theas have like fodder.

For for sure.

Yeah, because you because then they're like, oh.

I'm gonna listen to Novio, you know, like they just got something to talk about me.

Show you let me tell y'all.

Let me tell y'all podcast listeners.

My wife does not make my plate.

I think I made it like a few times in the beginning, just so I could be like mainly because we were about around my parents and I knew that I had to because then I would be found upon.

But as soon as we got as soon as I got, you not around affair.

Yeah, it's so crazy because I'm watching her serve everybody.

I'm like, dagga, she didn't, she didn't made a plate for both of our kids.

She's over there helping her dad, and I'm.

Just like, okay, well that that's a lie.

You know why I know that because your mama.

Makes My mom already got here, so stop lying.

Okay, Okay, I'm putting, I'm putting, you're putting extras.

Okay yah.

Uh so yeah.

So yeah, in the South, you you you you serve that.

Now, I will say this once we're all sitting down, the patriarch, like the figurehead, whether it's a grandfather or in any of any of the grandparent generation, you know, you let them get their food first.

No any other grandparents, but usually like the father, whatever that father is, he gets his choice of meat.

First, he gets the best, the biggest chicken, the biggest one.

You know what I'm saying.

That's one thing that like, you know, if if if I'm like in a cousin, if I'm in the cousin tier right with the kids are the cousin tier, and I'll reach for a piece of chick and that's the size for a full grown nail.

Oh, you're gonna get your hand popped, right or yeah, or one of them, one of the moms or the auntie is gonna be like, that's for that's for your daddy, that's for your father, you know what I'm saying.

Like they get the biggest pieces of stuff that grab you a little wing, you know what I'm saying, grab you a little jumpstick, because you're not not allowed.

That's not for you with no you know, and for kids we don't necessarily from what I remember, is like we don't serve the kids, but there is a section of the table that's for them because and and they'll put it over there for them.

Okay, y'all, y'all gonna get y'all's things, you know what I'm saying.

Noah, serve yourself, get yourself plate now you want some of this, you know what I'm saying.

And then and then they'll make sure that you don't put your little nasty, dirty hands inside the food, you know what I'm saying.

So that's one thing we are like we serve our children to ye and then y'all.

Gonna go sit over there, you know what I'm saying.

And then and then the party starts.

Yeah, okay, so that's yeah, we don't at least where I'm at.

Well, that's then they don't necessarily serve a men like that.

What's another one?

No one should have to tell you if they have to tell you you already messed up to like clean up your plate and stuff, No one should tell you.

You should already know get up whoever cooked whatever.

You should have already been complimenting them, telling, oh man, that was amazing, you know what I'm saying.

Then you go, you know where the trash can look if you should already be tying up the trash bag, like, don't let it if you wait for somebody to tell you you already messed up.

You know what I'm saying, Say, hey, can you hey, you mind grabbing me?

That's messed up?

You should already be like wiping up stuff.

Be like, you know Auntie, you know miss Jenkins, where do you keep the broom?

Okay, baby broom right there?

You should already ask her.

You know what I'm saying.

If you wait, if you wait and somebody got to ask you, or if everybody cleaning up around you, oh, you don't already messed up.

See this is where I don't know if it's regional or not, but for us, it's like being the host comes with like certain responsibilities and one and I think, like in a Latino household, like it's about how you serve and how you treat everyone while they're there.

So you actually want to beat the host wants to beat their guests from cleaning.

See that's what's crazy.

That's why I'm like, maybe that's happen.

That's what I'm saying.

All this stuff, this is nuanced what I'm saying, This is unspoken.

Yeah, you understand what I'm saying.

Like you're supposed to as the guest, feel obligated to help.

Yes, you know what I'm saying.

And as a host, you should, like, at least from how I remember, it is like you should feel like like you should do it before anyone else does, so before the guests start cleaning up.

It almost shows on the goat and the host like they ain't doing their job right, you're slacking your you know.

Like, oh so so if I'm at like your thes house and.

Like, it'll mean don't clean up after yourself.

Yeah, but I'm saying if I just start helping while she's still eating, it's almost like she's like, oh my god, yes, like you just met life out.

Yeah, you basically just told her like she don't know how to throw a party, y'all.

Did y'all follow that?

You see how you just messed up by trying to help?

Yeah, you just messed up by being like you just told her she's a trash host.

Yeah so, but I do feel like there are some caveats where like now if you offer to help, you got to ask that person if they if you can do it, because it's almost like a reverence, like they gonna tell you how to do it, right.

Okay, that's true, you know, so I don't know if that's that might a good one if you're just like if you ask, like, hey, do you would you like me to would you like me to empty the trash.

Yeah for you, thank you so much.

You know what I'm saying, Dan, that's different.

Now you better just start.

That's where we at, like, you better just start.

And at some point like and then that's the other thing sometimes with like the cousins, Like if one cousin gets up and starts helping, yo, Mama gonna look over at you and being like, why wasn't that you You see Sean over there taking the trash out?

You know what I mean?

So now I gotta go in there and you be like, damn Sean, Sean smiling, but you know so, yeah, that's that's that's that's a good one.

So what's another one?

Let me see you got any more off the head than you could think of it?

I do, but I'm trying to remember the name of it because it's been so long since I oh wait, I think I might have it.

So the other reason, the other thing with the theos ones they're drinking is that at some point someone's gonna throw money in the.

Air, like change It's okay.

I feel so I just outed myself right now.

I feel like such a hipster.

Wow, because you don't remember this.

Yeah, And it's basically where like they're either pulled some of the change, like the man will or like, uh just or someone will just know to bring like a whole bunch of just change.

I haven't seen this lately because I feel like this is more like like recent yeah, like Mexican households, and you know, I don't think we have enough around now in terms of like feels, you know, and children to like do this anymore.

But I remember growing up at some point in the night, probably by a deal that had one too many.

He's gonna throw some money in the air and people and then all the kids are going to rush to try to get something like almost like a pinata with money.

That's so dope.

Now I gotta look it up.

I can't remember what the name of it, and it's driving me crazy.

Oh man, ain't nothing like that.

Now.

There is definitely an uncle that's going to like hand you like a dollar, hand you five dollars.

I come here, don't tell you, Mama give you some money.

Do y'all have a we're gonna go for a while tradition?

Uh, not that I can think of.

Why you have that?

Yeah, that means you're gonna go smoke some weed.

Oh yeah, we're gonna go for a walk.

Oh I thought that was like the eldest going for a while for healthy reasons.

No, I mean they're finna go so you So it's like so and you can always tell, like, all right, so cousin Kirk, cousin, Aaron, cousin, Ben, cousin Daisy.

It's called so.

I was very close.

I was calling it volo with the V.

But it's a b the boodle.

So all right, and they're gonna go.

Well, the point is they're gonna go smoke.

And if these are your older cousins and they go and you want to go for a walk, you've made it.

If they invite you on the walk, Dang, you made it, because it's kind of a ride of passage because they gonna go, I gonna go smoke.

Yo, you're finna go for a walk.

Can come now, We'll be all right back.

Damn it.

Once you go play one to play one video games, so then you then you stuck in the video game room.

So there's that like that eleven to twelve, thirteen fourteen window when your seventeen, eighteen, nineteen year old cousins when they go for they walk, when they finally are like, yeah, come on, then you're like yees yo, saying, even if you don't smoke, it's just cool that you that they let you go, because that means you understand you you're in the you're in the circle of trust y'all saying, does.

That mean that you've graduated to now being able to roast others instead of roast being the one that's.

You can roast a butve you can roast up.

You can always roast down, okay, but you can't roast up unless you've crossed that long Now you're in that.

Yeah, Now when you when you eleven thirteen fourteen, you when you're eleven twelve thirteen, you're actually your roasting skills really ain't as good as everybody else's.

True, So you learn, but you learn it right.

But if you get a good clapback, that art of that clap back, if you can get a good one in.

Sometimes you got to say I'm under your under your breath, and you just say them to the cousins, so you don't say I'm to the person themselves.

Like when your auntie come in and she got jokes and then when she leave, you start dragging her to the rest of the cousins.

It's pretty hilarious.

Yeah, y'all got jokes, but you ain't gonna say it to her until you cross that cross that threshold.

This is my clapasha clap back.

Yeah, the clap back Thanksgiving a Christmas you.

Know community, because you can't really talk back to the theas that are talking trash about you, uh huh.

But man online you can.

Yeah, you can drag them all line.

Yeah.

Lastly, we'll end with this, so as y'all know we are a blended, blended black Sikin family.

What is the one thing you've learned from being part of my family that you was like?

Okay, I know now, I'm never gonna mess this up because I know mine.

I'm gonna tell mine in a second.

Okay, dang, I feel unffair?

Should I go first?

Then?

So you can?

I want to see the one that pupped in my head right now?

Do it.

Y'all's love for aluminum foil is unbelievable.

It's like, y'all, I never heard of that vegetable oil like want to be butter buckets that you're supposed to save to take you know, that's what we do.

We reuse our yogurt, you know, bottles, so you ain't got to use all.

That country crop little thing, right.

Yeah, yes, that's what you're living with when you take your food our food.

Yeah na, illuminum foil.

It's it's pretty true.

I was gonna say, whatever you do, don't overfill your plate because you have to eat everything.

Yes, and it's important.

And the problem is and then you gotta time it because if you eat it too fast, then they gonna think, oh, you really like it, let me give you more, Let me give you more.

Yes, And you're like, oh, so you set yourself up.

You just set yourself up.

It is.

Deeply offensive to not finish your meal.

So you have to like when whatever they serve and just get you one scoop each, Okay, pace yourself right and and yo yo out.

I found yo out is the liquor.

That's your way out.

So if I'm dying, right, but if if if somebody goes you want a beer, hea vessa, then you're like, yeah, yeah, no, let me come with you.

So then I go with you.

That's my out.

And then how do you out yourself from the drinking.

You got?

Like you just gotta nurse that one, you nurse that one, but then after a while, somebody's gonna call you.

At that point, that's when you go, I'm gonna check on the kids.

So you gotta go check on the kids, you know what I'm saying, And just trying to like ham up your your drunkenness, like probably not as fade as as he does, because let me tell you right now, you can't drink with these people.

I'm gonna tell you that right now.

Brothers, fellas, look it and just go ahead and grab thigh, Just grab thigh, just cut it, just just cut that.

Cut that alcohol a little bit.

I'll tell you what white people, if you showing up at these houses, Listen, y'all, y'all, y'all drinking is very different, y'all get y'all like to mix, y'all be it's y'all concoctions of a multiple different types of drinks, which is why y'all get so shit faced, like that's not how it happens in our houses.

If you ship face like that, that's different.

Like especially if you're a guest and you ship faced, it's a problem, you know what I'm saying.

So listen, what you drink.

What they drinking.

If they drink, that's that's the if.

If whatever, he havn't like whatever, that to ya having you?

If they drinking modelos, you drinking models.

If they drinking Pacifico, they drinking Gron, you drinking gron.

If they haven't tequila shots, you having t squitha shots.

You just do what they do.

Just don't keep up.

You don't have to keep up.

Just you know, if he pouring a new shot, you want more, then just dump out what you got real quick and just refill it again and just drink it halfway because he's gonna be like what I'm asking.

You're like, yeah, dump it real quick and so so now, although they on seventh, you on fourth.

You know what I'm saying, that's my that's what I learned.

Yeah, so so healthy, so healthy?

Well yes, well if you follow these simple rules, these nuances, these unspoken things where you just you know, show up at a time that's not too late but not too early.

You know what I'm saying, help out, but don't help out because you might be insulted.

So clear, Yeah, exactly, play a game, be good at it, but not too good, yo, saying, know somebody else more than just your significant other.

Make sure you got friends with somebody else there.

You know what I'm saying.

If this is a friend's party again, if you invite it over and that's not your girlfriend, you look, they might rob you.

It's very like if depend on how good you are, especially with black folks, you might get robbed.

I'm not gonna lie.

I can't.

I can't protect you from that.

And if it's even if it's my homie and my cousin just robbed you, I'm not.

You think I'm gonna say something I'm related to this, Nick, I'm not gonna tell you nothing.

I'm sorry.

Bro.

Yeah, you see about the next party.

You gotta show up at the next party.

Homie, like, I don't not to tell you.

It's like, hey, your uncle took my watch.

I'm like, yeah, nah, he crazy.

You shouldn't have been sitting over there with him.

Man, how about giving people that heads up before.

That's what you don't do.

I didn't.

I didn't do it.

Yeah, yeah, my wife didn't give me.

It's a long story for another day.

Story.

Yeah, this is this is now an hour h So, ladies and gentlemen, once again, the gorgeous, the brilliance, all right, the smash the patriarchy, Drm, Mazara Gosa Petty, thank you.

Wow, I should come on here more often than as a guest.

I'm trying to say, Man, I'm having to drag you to the mic.

Can you tell everybody where to follow you on the socials?

Yeah, I'm at the dock ZP across the socials.

So that's t H E.

D O c ZP the doc.

And to be real, I don't really post a lot, but to be honest with you, but when I post, it's significant what I'm saying.

Damkay, it's pretty true.

It is.

She don't talk a lot, but when she do bars Yeah, I agree.

All right, well thanks on that note.

At least.

You're the rest of that home.

No, I don't.

Look there's limits, all right, y'all, Very good, y'all.

This mug was recorded and edited by me Propaganda right here in East Lost Boyle Heights, Los Angeles.

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