[SPEAKER_00]: Welcome to the Jamie See Show, a soft place to land for visionaries, the feelers, the heart led leaders, rewriting the rules of business.

[SPEAKER_00]: I'm Jamie See author, educator, and eight figure founder whose work blends nervous system science subconscious rewiring and story driven strategy.

[SPEAKER_00]: If you know that your work is meant to reach more people, if you crave a business that feels as good in your body as it looks on paper, you are in the right place.

[SPEAKER_00]: Here we go way beyond formulas and we go into the felt.

[SPEAKER_00]: This is business.

[SPEAKER_00]: Reimagined through softness, strategy, and soul.

[SPEAKER_00]: Let's begin.

[SPEAKER_00]: I recently saw a TikTok video about a girl who's a business owner, and she said 50 k months do not feel like enough.

[SPEAKER_00]: She started talking about how originally she started making 10k, then 20k, then 30k, and then 40k, and then now she's at 50k, she keeps saying, I keep thinking that this is going to feel like I've finally reached some place, or that I finally feel successful.

[SPEAKER_00]: And then the next video was about how she's now.

[SPEAKER_00]: trying to reach 100 payments.

[SPEAKER_00]: And this is a topic that, honestly, I don't think a lot of people talk about, but it's more common than you think, and it actually has nothing to do with the money itself.

[SPEAKER_00]: Today, we're actually going to be talking about why this happens.

[SPEAKER_00]: I actually experience something very similar, and I think that while I navigate this story, you're going to start understanding exactly why this happens and how it really doesn't have anything to do with money at all.

[SPEAKER_00]: When I was a hairstylist, I was about to go out on my own, and I was working for a family-owned business for about 10 years.

[SPEAKER_00]: At this point, my daughter was about...

[SPEAKER_00]: three months old, and I decided that I was gonna go out of my own.

[SPEAKER_00]: I was like, okay, I'm going to be able to do this.

[SPEAKER_00]: I have no idea how to run a business, but I'm gonna figure it out.

[SPEAKER_00]: And I have everyone chit chat in my ears, tell me that this is gonna be a terrible decision that I shouldn't be doing it, that I should stay at the safe job.

[SPEAKER_00]: And I decide, no, I'm changing my life, I'm going to do this.

[SPEAKER_00]: And mind you, there are $0 in my bank account at this moment, that I decided to do this with, [SPEAKER_00]: a very young child.

[SPEAKER_00]: And I decided, okay, I have two weeks left of my job.

[SPEAKER_00]: I'm going to take these last two weeks of clients.

[SPEAKER_00]: That paycheck is going to pay for what I need to pay my first month's rent and materials for my first week at my new job that I was essentially going to be taking clients and all thanks.

[SPEAKER_00]: So my boss calls me and says, hey, don't ever come back.

[SPEAKER_00]: We are giving all of your clients away to other people.

[SPEAKER_00]: And in this moment, I realized, holy shit, what the heck did I just do?

[SPEAKER_00]: And in that moment, scientifically, what actually happened to my body was, my nervous system essentially said, you are in danger, and things are not going to be okay, and you're going to have to make it okay.

[SPEAKER_00]: And the only way that my body knew how to do that was to keep moving and to keep doing it, so that I could get enough [SPEAKER_00]: money to feed my kid, keep a roof over my head, literally just pure survival at that moment.

[SPEAKER_00]: And I think at the moment I thought, okay, I'm going to do whatever I have to do to make it work.

[SPEAKER_00]: But it was imprinted in my body that this moment when you had nothing to your name and you had to make it work was what would happen if you weren't working hard.

[SPEAKER_00]: What ended up happening was I reached more monetary goals in a very short amount of time that I think I had ever in my life done before and even when I got there even when I actually had enough money to breathe [SPEAKER_00]: I still felt like I couldn't slow down and that I had to keep moving.

[SPEAKER_00]: And essentially, the reason why this happens is because we are looking for something outside of ourselves to make our body feel safe.

[SPEAKER_00]: And for some people, this is to feel like enough or to feel valuable or to feel worthy or to feel seen or to feel important.

[SPEAKER_00]: But for me, it was just to make sure that I didn't hurt my family, that I didn't put them in a situation that I had originally put them in when I didn't have a scent to my name.

[SPEAKER_00]: When I slowed down, I felt urgency, I felt panic, I felt fear, and then I just kept saying, okay, I'm going to reach this next school, and then that's when I can slow down.

[SPEAKER_00]: If I just reach this school, then I can slow down.

[SPEAKER_00]: When I make that amount of money, something that's outside of myself, then I can slow down, and then I would reach it, and I would slow down and it feel immediate panic.

[SPEAKER_00]: The reason why, let's just say the girl in the TikTok video, 50 came on, [SPEAKER_00]: Why does that happen?

[SPEAKER_00]: Because most people will look at that and be like 50k would quite literally change my life.

[SPEAKER_00]: It would set me up for success, it would make everything so much easier.

[SPEAKER_00]: And logically, yes, logically it makes sense.

[SPEAKER_00]: But when the body feels like it is constantly not safe until something else happens, until you reach this thing, the goal post is just going to [SPEAKER_00]: that is going to give you the feeling that you'll be safe.

[SPEAKER_00]: There's not a lot of money sometimes.

[SPEAKER_00]: There's not enough praise or validation to ever fill something that we actually need within.

[SPEAKER_00]: When you are searching outside of yourself, a goal, a amount of followers, a amount of money, a amount of success, to essentially make you feel safe, there will always be urgency in the body [SPEAKER_00]: And this is when the body feels safe in the now and not when you reach something else and that's exactly why the goal post keeps moving.

[SPEAKER_00]: So for example, if you are reaching a specific goal, there's nothing wrong with goal setting.

[SPEAKER_00]: There's nothing wrong with wanting a certain amount of followers or certain amount of revenue coming in.

[SPEAKER_00]: But when we say that there is something waiting over there that until I reach that, that is when I will feel enough or that is when I will feel successful or that is when I will feel important you're always in separation from the thing that you desire and the way that is going to start feeling like enough for you is actually building safety in the now and feeling okay with the now and the way that we do this is [SPEAKER_00]: how can you be so grateful and present and hear for yourself in this moment?

[SPEAKER_00]: How can you look at everything that is actually available to you?

[SPEAKER_00]: How can you find grounded safety in your body?

[SPEAKER_00]: This could be through EFT tapping.

[SPEAKER_00]: This could be through calling a friend.

[SPEAKER_00]: This could be through going for a walk.

[SPEAKER_00]: This could be through journaling or self-encrywork.

[SPEAKER_00]: This is a process of internal work [SPEAKER_00]: At the end of the day, if there's something always outside of you, that is holding your joy or holding your enoughness, that's why the goal post keeps moving.

[SPEAKER_00]: One of my clients actually reached out to me and she was like, Jamie, I am internally freaking out.

[SPEAKER_00]: I need guidance, I need support.

[SPEAKER_00]: And she just said, I usually have a certain amount of sales calls that book every single week.

[SPEAKER_00]: And I opened up my calendar and it's a it's a slow week.

[SPEAKER_00]: I don't have any I don't have any calls booked and you could even hear in her voice that there is this like panic starting this urgency in in the way that she was communicating to me and she was just like I just need to know like how can I fix it should I go and start posting more should I analyze my ad should I do all these things and you could tell that she was trying to fix something outside of herself to make her feel safe.

[SPEAKER_00]: And the problem with what actually happens when we do this when the sales slow down or when it's a still season and we're immediately feeling this urgency to fix or to do something to make it change immediately or actually looking for soothing and safety in the body versus being like, okay, I can I can find okness in this moment.

[SPEAKER_00]: I can feel grounded in this moment.

[SPEAKER_00]: Instead of urgency, let me fix it, let me do these things because exactly what's going to happen in that moment and what I told my client is, even if a client books now.

[SPEAKER_00]: You are going to feel, you're going to feel this like, oh, it's like this soothing, like this temporary sense of okayness, enoughness, all right, I'm okay now.

[SPEAKER_00]: So what happens when, let's just say you get sick for a week, [SPEAKER_00]: How are you going to find?

[SPEAKER_00]: Okay, Ness.

[SPEAKER_00]: How are you going to be okay?

[SPEAKER_00]: with an outcome or with something outside of yourself, that's not the way that you need it to be, to feel okay.

[SPEAKER_00]: So this is exactly what I told her.

[SPEAKER_00]: I said, okay, if you had approached me and said, hey, Jamie, I just noticed for the last week, things are feeling like a little open, not as many calls booked and I'm feeling okay with it.

[SPEAKER_00]: I'm just now feeling like maybe I'm gonna get a little curious.

[SPEAKER_00]: And kind of see, hey, is there something that I'm not doing as often?

[SPEAKER_00]: Like getting a little curious on am I doing my non-negotiables in my business?

[SPEAKER_00]: Is there something that I could adjust or change?

[SPEAKER_00]: And if she had approached with curiosity of saying, hey, I feel totally fine.

[SPEAKER_00]: I know that it's going to be okay.

[SPEAKER_00]: I know that calls will be booked, but maybe I can just acknowledge that there might be an adjustment of strategy.

[SPEAKER_00]: I would have said, absolutely, let's take a look.

[SPEAKER_00]: It was, I don't feel safe because of this and now I need to fix it now.

[SPEAKER_00]: Urgency, panic, fix it mode.

[SPEAKER_00]: And so the goal here is it's always an invitation within yourself, always an invitation.

[SPEAKER_00]: So instead of launching another flash sale and instead of having to do something immediately to get a sense of safety in something outside of yourself, invite yourself to ask, what am I searching for in this exact moment that I think that is going to give me?

[SPEAKER_00]: What is that thing that sale that temporary thing that's going to make me feel okay?

[SPEAKER_00]: What is that feeling that I want?

[SPEAKER_00]: Is it okay?

[SPEAKER_00]: I feel good.

[SPEAKER_00]: I feel grounded.

[SPEAKER_00]: I feel safe.

[SPEAKER_00]: I feel like enough.

[SPEAKER_00]: I feel, oh, I feel I feel like I can breathe.

[SPEAKER_00]: Like what is the thing that you're actually searching for?

[SPEAKER_00]: And then from there, we're actually going to find internal safety because your body, [SPEAKER_00]: and has to feel okay with what is now in this moment, enoughness in the now for you to then be able to take action and move with clarity and move with grounded assuriness.

[SPEAKER_00]: If you're at a season right now where you've reached all these amazing new goals, the follower count, the revenue, and there's still this underlying feeling of it's not enough.

[SPEAKER_00]: I just want to validate the fact that there's nothing wrong with you.

[SPEAKER_00]: How does single thing wrong with you?

[SPEAKER_00]: All your body is desiring is to feel safe.

[SPEAKER_00]: And the beautiful thing is that you get to create that.

[SPEAKER_00]: Your goals, the money, all of it.