Hi everyone, and welcome back to the podcast episode.

My name is Lisha Gogin, the host of the Globes You Guess podcast, where I help you expand your mind and become more self aware so that you can glow up into the best version of yourself.

Hello and happy Sunday.

If you're listening to this on a Sunday, I hope your day has been good today.

I want to talk about trusting the timing of your own life.

Essentially, this message will be the ones who feel like they are the late bloomers, late blooming in your career, your success, your relationships, your healing journey, whatever it is.

If you feel like you are late, then hopefully what I talk about in this episode will help.

And I wanted to make this episode for a few reasons.

One, I've been talking about relationships a lot, and I feel like there is a lot of feeling like you're not at the right stage of life when it comes to relationships, like maybe you're single, or maybe you're going through a divorce, even maybe you're going through a breakup or things just aren't working out.

And I think as you age, especially as women, we feel that pressure like I'm not married yet, I haven't had kids yet, whatever it is, and there's a lot of discourse about this timeline that we need to be living up to.

Same thing goes with success, I feel, especially for myself.

I'm going to share some stories where I have felt like I should have been further along, or I wanted something really bad in that moment and it just wasn't happening.

Fast forward to it actually happening and realizing the beauty sometimes in late blooming, and this can even lead into wellness and health issues.

Sometimes we want the healing to hurry up and be quicker, and we think that we should be further along.

And it's not to say that we wouldn't wish to be the best version of ourselves in healthy and happy in all these things right now.

But sometimes there is wisdom in the you not technically quote unquote being where you honestly think you should be.

And I think it's just always important to remind yourself that this whole like late blooming thing is not a curse at all.

It's not a punishment.

If anything, it is a part of your story and sometimes a blessing that we are late bloomers.

Oh, we're going to talk about it.

I'm going to share some personal stories, like I said, and hopefully you'll feel a little bit better about feeling like you are behind.

But before we get further into the episode, I just want to thank today's sponsor, which is once again Bumble.

This is our final sponsorship.

We've been sponsored by them the entire month, which I am so grateful for.

I love Bumble.

Hopefully we will manifest working with them again, but for now, let me quickly tell you about Bumble.

Dating apps have been such a big part of my journey from when I was navigating single life to even now being in a healthy relationship, and that is why I'm so excited to talk to you guys about Bumble.

When I was actively dating, this was the app that I would use, and Guys, I've always had really good experiences on it.

Now, many of you also know that I'm a full time content creator and I work for myself, which means it can be pretty hard for me to meet people in real life.

So apps like Bumble have always helped me keep my options open and have given me opportunities to connect with new people in a way that felt accessible and very lighthearted and honestly, guys, Bumble just keeps getting better.

They've added a dating advice hub right in the app, filled with expert tips to guide you through every stage of your dating journey, whether you're brand new or giving love another try.

It's like having a dating coach in your pocket, and for peace of mind, everyone verifies their photo and phone number with optional ID verification too.

That way, you know the person that you're meeting is real, their photos are real, and their age is real.

Another one of my favorite features that Bumble offers is called Shared Interest, to help members showcase their lifestyle and their personality, in which Bumble will then highlight interests that you have in common right up front, helping you quickly determine whether the person that you're interested in is actually your vibe and if you want to start a conversation now.

They've also upgraded their profile prompts by allowing members to add a photo alongside their answer, which is just another way that you can express your interests and your personality and even your lifestyle in a more visual way.

For me, dating has always just been about staying open, keeping your heart open and your options open, and Bumble just makes it so much easier to do that it really doesn't need to feel so daunting or serious.

So if you've been thinking about giving love another shot, I would definitely recommend downloading Bumble.

It might just be the place where your next chapter begins.

And so I want to start with the first time I really felt like I was late blooming, and that was actually to do with relationships and boys essentially.

In high school and even in elementary school, I was like so shy, I was not confident within myself, and I was just never the girl that had a boyfriend or was like really popular and things like that, and it definitely started to get to me to the point where I felt really bad about myself and like I was doing something wrong because like I didn't have a boyfriend in high school and even like moving into college, of course I talked to guys here and there, and I had my little like issues in a way with you know, chasing the validation and talking to the wrong people and all that.

But I still, like, deep down felt like I wasn't on track because I definitely did see people who had healthy relationships, who had been in relationships for a really long time, or just like had solid boyfriends.

I never really even had that but now looking back, that was such a blessing for so many reasons.

And if there is something in your life where you feel like you are behind on, never look at it as a punishment or a bad thing.

Start looking at it as preparation.

This season of your life is preparing you for something bigger than you even have now.

And I always like to use example of a single hood.

There is going to be a day where you are not single and you don't have as much free time and freedom essentially that you will have right now.

And also through your single era, you get to really think about who you want to be with, the partner that you want to spend the rest of your life with.

This is also a perfect time for you to connect to yourself and build a relationship with yourself, build out your routine, to figure out what you'd like to do in your life, your purpose, hobbies, friendships, There's so many things that you can fill this time with that you should never think of it as a punishment.

When I was in high school and I was the one who wasn't dating, didn't have boyfriends, didn't really have anyone like interested in me, and things like that, I felt like I was behind I felt like I was being punished.

But I look back at that time and I was able to focus on the things that actually mattered when it came to me transitioning from high school into college, building a relationship with myself, building out my self worth, not getting mixed up with the wrong guys, spending more time on my health and my wellness and my habits in my schooling instead of spending so much time chasing a guy, spending all my time with boys, searching for validation and other people things like that.

I'm really so happy that I didn't get everything handed to me, that I didn't have all that attention and focus on guys, because I genuinely do think that that would have taken me away from some of the things that I ended up building in my life.

And it's not to mean that if you were young and you did, you know, have a relationship or boys and things like that, it was the wrong thing.

But in my path, I see how it was actually such a blessing.

Now, actually, let's fast forward to an example.

In the past few years of my life, there was a pattern that I was playing out with this one person in my life that needed to end, and it was slowly ending.

And this was a time where one of my friends was actually getting solid and being asked to be a girlfriend to her now boyfriend, and I just remember how how much contrast I was seeing, how like my situation was so opposite of hers, and I was feeling like, what the hell is happening in my life?

Like this should be where I'm at right now, where you know, there's a guy who's committing to me and this that, And partly that was true because realistically I should have been treated the way that she was being treated, which just set my standard, which is like a side note, like have friends who have like good standards because it can also like help you like figure out what your standards are as well.

But anyways, I remember feeling down about it because I'm like, wow, like this situation is not turning out the way that I wanted it to, which would have been technically like her situation.

And then fast forward, it's so crazy.

Fast forward to a few years later this summer, actually my boyfriend asks me to like officially be his girlfriend.

And listen, we're like older now, and we already established that we were in a relationship.

But I was like, you know, it'd be nice to like have it official, and he made it really special and it's definitely a memory that's a core memory and always be in my head.

So I really appreciate him for doing that.

But the night that he asked me to be his girlfriend ended up falling on the anniversary of when my friend was asked to be for now boyfriend's girlfriend.

So it's just such a full circle moment thinking of how a few years ago I was like really down about it and that sucks and why me and I am so late to this game.

Fast forward to now I am in the same position that she is, but just a few years later on that same day.

And by the way, like my boyfriend had no idea that that was their anniversary and she had actually told me that like a few days before, but I completely forgot when he asked me.

And then I told her.

I'm like, ah, you like officially asked me, and she's like, oh my gosh, wait, that's our anniversary too.

That's so crazy.

So anyways, I say all that to say, sometimes it happens like that, And now, looking back, for so many reasons, I'm happy that that relationship obviously didn't work out and it was a pattern that I was going through that I needed to let go of and I needed to work through.

And only by taking those few years of working through those patterns and working on myself and all the lessons that I learned through that time, was I even able to bring myself to finally find the guy that's so perfect for me.

And I think about the other times where I thought I should have been further than I was.

There was a time where I actually wanted to start YouTube, and I did.

I was like talking about self development and things like that, and although all those things were true and they were good, I was still going through it to the point where, like I wasn't able to keep up with YouTube.

This was like years and years and years ago, probably in like twenty seventeen, and I was doing a good job.

And I think that that time of me putting effort into making YouTube videos was very helpful for me in terms of just getting through the situation that I was going through.

It was like one of the hardest times behind closed doors, and so I think that was like what I needed to get through, but I wasn't able to be consistent with it, essentially, and then I kind of dropped that It wasn't that I dropped that dream.

I always had it, but I didn't start up YouTube until years and years and years later.

But I think about how it was so required that I had so many of those years go on before I started YouTube and even my podcast, because there were so many missing pieces to the puzzle that I still needed to learn and go through between the time that I had started till now that I'm so happy that it was now that I started my podcast and everything because I just feel like I'm able to make a bigger impact on the world because I have really gone through so much, Like I feel like I lived like ten lives since the last time I actually even started.

And when it comes to like things like podcasts and careers and things like that, I feel like sometimes especially when we're young, even if we're not young, we think that we should be further ahead, like oh, like I want this one position or I want to be this huge person.

But I think about even my own journey with my podcast even now, I'm so happy that I've been doing it slowly and I've been building up because it's really allowed me to be embodied and to be able to share a message through personal experience, and I think that that's what's always going to allow you to be the most successful, is you actually having lived experience and you really knowing the content, or you really knowing your position in your job well.

And that takes time.

Sometimes it's not the season for you to start the podcast or the YouTube channel, or for you to step into that career path.

Maybe life requires you to do a little bit more soul searching, or for you to do a little bit more work on yourself or to develop a skill.

So if you've been rejected from jobs or it doesn't feel like it's happening right now, don't look at it as punishment.

Look at this as preparation.

I remember there's this one time when I was working corporate and there was a position that was like a little bit higher for me, and I just thought like, Yeah, this is so good, mainly because it was just paying me a little bit more money.

But I didn't end up getting it, and I felt down about it.

But I'm so happy that I didn't get it, because that was not the path that it was meant for me anyways.

And I feel like if I were to have been put in that situation, it's not like I wouldn't have been able to excel, but that would have taken me further away from my actual true calling, which is my podcast and helping people heal and sharing my message and you know, writing my book and coming out with these products and services and all those things.

So I'm really happy that those things actually didn't work out because it led me to where I need to be.

So sometimes when things don't work out, it does feel really shitty.

Even when it comes to a relationship, it feels shitty, but you will realize eventually that all these roads are going to lead to that bigger picture that you might not even be able to see right now.

You just have to trust in that.

I also think with my products and services, I have a book, I've written a book.

I think I was ready for writing that book.

But what I've learned on my journey is sometimes it's important that you take longer than just pushing a product or a service out because you want to be embodied.

You want to really stand behind your product and you want it to be good, and that involves time and it also involves you learning depending on what it is that you're putting out, of course, but also when it comes to being an entrepreneur and you actually putting something out into the world, it is going to require you to have confidence within yourself, because if you do not, you're probably gonna sabotage and you're not gonna put it out, or you're going to feel really insecure about it and you might not promote it and things like that.

So I've always learned that if I feel a pull to taking time on projects and putting things out into the world, it's probably for a reason, and I shouldn't push myself past that.

Even though I see other people dropping services and products and doing this and that or even starting new ventures, like that's amazing and that's cool, But I need to come back to myself and look at the bigger picture.

Am I ready for this?

Am I confident?

Am I embodied in this?

And if I'm not, then let me take that time to really flesh that out and not push myself and honestly just be okay with the delay, with the preparation.

I also think about the times where I was in high school moving into college and I just wanted to be glowed up so much like I just wanted to look good.

I wanted to have the outfits I wanted to have this career, this dream life, like everything, and I was really down bad about the fact that I didn't have that.

I just wanted those things so quick, and God bless my heart for wanting those things and working towards those things, because I ended up getting those things, but it was on a different timeline.

But I think about how if I had everything handed to me at age eighteen, if I had the body, if I had the looks to like a ten, if I had the outfits, if I had the money, if I had the car, if I had the dream job, I would not know how to act okay.

I probably would be mixed up with the wrong guys.

I would be blowing my money in ways that was not responsible.

I probably would not be the best version of myself.

Sometimes your dream life is going to require you to take your time with things that you can be more responsible and mature with the blessings that will inevitably come.

The way that I manage my money now is so different than how I used to manage my money even in my early twenties, that I am very happy that I didn't have the success and freedom and money that I have now because I genuinely believe I would have mismanaged that.

Another thing to remind yourself is that just because you are a late bloomer and it's taking longer than you expected to pick up a skill or find the love of your life or be successful in a certain area, doesn't mean that you cannot achieve that, and it doesn't mean that you will not achieve that.

And I feel that I've experienced that a lot.

When it came to the schooling system, I was always behind in school.

I definitely needed more support in and out of school that I just didn't get when I was younger, which made it more difficult for me to learn as quickly as other students.

And it is shown that children who score high on the ASKILL essentially children who go through any sort of trauma or financial insecurity and struggle in their home life can very much so struggle in school.

It's not always like that.

There are kids who excel insanely in school and their home life is a mess.

But for me, it definitely was a struggle and I definitely needed more support.

I was also just very shy and not necessarily a confident child in the schooling systems because I was scared to ask questions, and I didn't understand things, and you know, didn't know how to use my voice.

I was also and still am dyslexic, So I think the way that a dyslexic learns is a little bit different, well, is different than others.

And I am not diagnosed with ADHD, but I know that I struggle with that lot.

I basically just say I have ADHD tendencies, and when you have ADHD, you kind of have to learn a different way.

I learned best auditorially and visually and whatever.

So I struggled in school and I just always thought that I was just dumb and I just didn't know it was happening.

And I do think this had something to do with when my dad passed away.

This was in grade ten, I believe is when he passed away, it just like really changed something in my brain chemistry without really knowing, because I was like really just had turned sixteen at that point, but something just changed and I really wanted to like do better in my life.

And I just remember being on my iPhone when I was in grade ten, eleven, and even twelve, I was like watching Ted Talks, Like Ted Talks were like the first thing that I ever like opened my eyes to when it came to self development, and I was like learning stuff and then I was doing my glow up and whatever.

So I started that journey and I got this self development mindset of being like, you know what, I can apply myself and I can do the things that I want my life.

I was super into Tumbler as well, and I was like always mood boarding and visioning.

This is also a time where I was preparing to go to college, like what do I want to do with my future and this that, and like I had goals.

I wanted to have a career and things like that.

So I was like, I need to apply myself.

I'm going to try And I remember turning around my marks in math, which I always felt that I was like the worst in math, and honestly, I still am not the best with math, but I'm so much better.

But I just started to actually sit down and ask questions and think through things and do my homework and try my best to be focused.

And I actually changed my grades, Like I actually started getting better with my grades.

I was good at English.

I started applying myself to nutrition, and I just started being more focused in my life, and as I grew up and even in college, I changed my self concept when it came to I am dumb and I don't know how to do things, to a self concept that was I might need extra time doing this, but I can do it if I put my mind to it, if I sit down and actually carve out time to understand things, and I need to ask questions and I need to get help if I don't understand something, And I do not identify with being somebody who is not intelligent and doesn't understand things and is dumb, because that is just not true.

And if I look at the successes that I've had in my life, it's because I have told myself I can do it.

And it's not too late.

It is not too late to become a YouTuber.

It is not too late to start a new career path, It is not too late to start a new relationship.

It is not too late to start anything ever.

And I found a Pinterest quote I want to read to you, and it says late bloomer, just as all the flowers cannot bloom at the same time, you should never think of yourself as further ahead or further behind, for we are moving at our own pace and going to a unique place, so there's no need to rush for the universe is moving in circles, and it works in second chances.

It doesn't know what is early and what is late.

It only shows when the time is right.

And how I think about knowing when the time is right and learning how to chill when I feel that I am behind in something in my life is to first stop resisting the fact that this is what my situation is.

The job rejection, the relationship rejection, the health issue that keeps flaring up.

Whatever it is that's not working out right now in your life, surrender to it as much as you can.

It doesn't mean that you don't keep looking for jobs.

It doesn't mean that you don't keep looking for love or trying to figure out what your purpose is in life.

But maybe that just looks like taking a little bit of a pivot or a step back or a breath for you to just come to yourself for a moment and be like, Okay, clearly this is not working.

Is there a different way that I could try this out?

Or do I simply just stop comparing myself to other people's timelines when something's not working in general, in life, the best thing that you can do is just to take your hands and your focus off of it for a second and just let it sit.

Stop thinking about it so much, stop focusing on it so much, give it a second.

I feel like a lot of us when we are wanting something so bad, we genuinely have this forceful energy where we just keep going and keep pushing and keep burning it out.

Sometimes all we need to do is let go and surrender, just for the time being.

When I'm working on a creative project and things feel a little confusing or misaligned, I will take a week or two to just let myself like recoup, not think about it too much, go experience life, and then come back to it if I need to.

I've seen this with love as well.

If something was not working out, I remove myself from that situation and I give myself a moment to just breathe, have a relationship with myself, get back to the things that I probably was not focusing on when my focus was on the wrong things.

Essentially all while telling myself that I'm still gonna get the thing and it's totally fine that it's not happening right now.

There is a reason.

There is some wisdom, and I'm gonna do my best to surrender.

I'm gonna stay positive.

I'm going to focus on the things that I can control, that I can put my attention and my energy in, and the things that I want in my life.

They will come to me.

I will attract them, but I'm not going to attract them when I have this negative energy, this forceful energy, this non belief in myself and the world.

So if you're feeling like you're late blooming in life, just know that this is all preparation for one and for two.

The best things in life they come with time.

Take your time with things in life, and remove your attention from other people's timelines, from society's timelines.

It's only keeping you further from your actual purpose in life, and even outside of that, it's just taking you away from the present moment, which is all you have.

So with that said, I hope this episode helped.

Don't forget to sign up for my email list.

It'll be in the description.

I'm going to be having a newsletter come out.

Also in the description will be links to my current digital guides and you will also within the email you will get updates on one.

I'm coming out with my new digital journal series, which I cannot wait.

I am working on it.

I've been filming and I'm just like getting everything ready.

But again, I'm taking my time with this.

I want it to be good.

I want to feel aligned with it, I want to feel embodied with it.

So I'm just allowing life to be life and for me to work on this when I feel called to.

Also, I do have one on one coaching sessions.

I open up sessions on a week to week basis.

All the information will always be down in a description.

I haven't been taking on too many clients this year because everything's just been so busy, but my hope is to continue to take on more of you guys.

I love working with you guys.

It's so beautiful to be able to help guide you guys through the podcast but also in one on one sessions.

So that will all be down below.

And I think that is its for today's episode.

Don't forget to subscribe if you are new, and also on my second channel, like my main channel, We're gonna be talking a lot about glowing up and self care and becoming the of our dreams.

Don't forget to check out those videos as well.

I typically come out with a video every week, and you can follow me on Instagram as well so you can get all the updates and everything like that.

With that said, I'll see you guys and the next one.

Bye.