Oohoo, I love your dog.

I want him, give him to me.

Let's get it.

Hey there, mister Redder here and you girl, young Karen in the house.

Welcome back to another episode of Reddit podcast Stories.

Our first story will be reading today you want my dog?

Well.

I think it's fairly safe to assume I've lost a couple of friends over this, but it wasn't me who caused it.

This weekend, a friend of mine asked me to keep an eye on her two kids while she and her hubby went away for the weekend for some couple time.

Her mother was initially going to watch the kids, but fell through on short notice.

She called me at three pm on Friday to come over in three hours, and my friend knew I probably wasn't doing anything, which was both hurtful and accurate, So I said sure.

She's got two kids, a daughter who's eight and a son who's five.

They're good kids for the most part.

The boy has a little bit of a snitching problem and the girl has a sharing problem.

But it's two days.

So I show up Friday.

After work while my friend gives me the rundown and her husband tells them to behave The parents leave and it's just me and the kids in the house, and its immediate pandemonium.

The brother snitches on his sister for taking an extra cookie.

The sister cries to me that her brother messed with her switch, and I make the executive decision that they've got too much energy and if they're tuckered out, they'll hopefully chill.

So I asked them to go find their swimsuits because we're going to the gym, which has a pool and a guest policy.

I did let mom know what we were up to before we left, and asked if it was okay if I brought my dog over.

He doesn't shed Andy's house trained.

She said that was fine.

Operation pool was a great success, though the locker room did get a bit dicey.

That's a whole other story.

Once everyone was appropriately tired, including me, we made a pit stop on the way back to their house to grab my pooch.

He's extremely well behaved and he loves kids, and both kids were immediately all about the dexter, and the dexter was all about the kids.

Ground rules, no pulling on his fur, and he goes where he wants.

Kids kind of struggle with the notion that a dog is not a toy.

I obviously kept him out of places where he wasn't supposed to go, but I'm a grown up.

Allegedly miraculously, after the swim and chasing the dog around the house left the kids too poop to pop and both fell asleep watching a Disney film on the TV.

After the movie, I woke the kids up to trot off to bed and didn't make them brush their teeth.

For the record, the Sun did, indeed yeep me under a bus when Mommy called in the morning.

I told the kid ows that if they left their doors open, Dexter might sneak in and give them cuddles.

I increased the likelihood of this by sleeping on the couch and not leaving him a spot.

He expressed his displeasure with me by flouncing off and going into the Sun's room to sleep.

Great success.

Saturday, we went for a hike in the morning, had a nap, and then played ball with a dog and generally had a pretty chill day.

Diffused the sharing issue by explaining to the daughter that the pup has feelings and wants just like any person, and she can't control him that way.

She appeared thoughtful, and then immediately started yelling at her brother for hogging the dog again.

At least she wasn't mad at the dog.

I successfully heated up the cast role.

Mom had left me for dinner, following her carefully laid out instructions, admonished the kids to not give him people food, and was soundly ignored.

I did draw the line at a couple morsels from each kid and put my foot down.

More than that, and he's going to get the runs, and nobody wants that.

That night, I made sure Sis got a turn by again hogging the couch and also closing the sun's door since he got a turn already.

The girl was smug.

The boy made me call his mom.

Mom wasn't happy that my dog was in her kid's beds.

I reminded her that he doesn't shed, and he can't smell worse than the kids, and her daughter might burn the house down with us inside it if she doesn't get a turn.

Mom accepted defeat.

Saturday night was again relatively peaceful, though toothbrushing did happen.

Early Sunday morning, I got woken up by having my dog's step on me, which is something he's really good at and he was mad at me for not leaving any room.

I made room.

Apparently the girl tried to do something he didn't like and he noped out of there.

She wasn't happy about that, but was appeased by my pain enough to go back to bed.

This morning was relatively chill, some more playing with a dog and some teen tug of war, and mom and dad got back around lunchtime and thanked me for keeping their kids in one piece.

The kids said bite to the pup, and there were tears, and I loaded up myself and my dog and went back home to enjoy the relative peace and quiet.

Yeah, I wish it ended there.

Maybe an hour after we got home, I get a phone call from a very frazzled sounding mom with kids crying in the background.

She says, they need my dog.

Now.

I'm sorry what you don't need a dog?

You need my dog like I don't need to come back and visit soon.

You just want him.

Well, the kids got so attached and they won't stop crying about missing the dog, and her and her husband don't have time for two kids and a puppy, and more guilt inducing word vomit that was having precisely zero effect on me.

Absolutely not click still getting texts about being reasonable, and you have.

Time to train a new dog.

Forty eight hours of free babysitting isn't enough you want my dog to not in this lifetime?

Am I the jerk for telling my girlfriend she can't just take back a replacement item she gave me after the lost item was found.

My girlfriend and I had a long debate about this quite a while ago, and it still remains a touchy subject in our relationship.

Please weigh in situation.

My girlfriend lost my volleyball when she borrowed it during one of our routine league nights.

She offered to replace it at no cost to me, since she acknowledged the ball going missing was entirely her fault.

True to her word, she gifted me a new ball before our next league night.

Note she physically gave the replacement ball to me.

And it was now in my possession.

It's now my ball.

When we got to our league later on, perhaps later that day or the following day, I forget which.

To be honest, my lost ball had been found by the staff and my girlfriend handed it back to me, at which point she also said, I'm going to take back the other ball now and when to take it from my bag.

I told her it wasn't okay for her to do that and challenged her on that point.

Her point of view, According to her, as I was no longer missing my original ball, so it was okay for her to take back the replacement ball.

She believes that by returning my original ball, the dead is settled, and since the replacement was no longer necessary for me to possess, it was hers to keep now as she had paid for it.

My point of view, once you give something to someone, you no longer have ownership of said item, as the ownership has been transferred over to the recipient.

Therefore, what happens with that item from that point on is not for the giver to decide.

I believe that for her.

To reassume ownership of something she has given away to be a huge transgression on her part.

Taking back a gift is a big no no in my eyes.

My gripe is that I feel like she should have asked for the replacement ball back rather than have assumed ownership of it outright if I wanted to donate the ball, or heck, even just keep it for myself, I feel it would have been my prerogative to do so, not hers.

Now to clarify one, as she had given me the ball as a replacement and the original ball had been found, I feel the morally correct thing for me to do would have been to offer the replacement ball back to her as a token of her generosity in the first place.

However, she had robbed me of this opportunity by deciding to take back the replacement ball before I could offer it back to her.

Two If she had purchased it but had not yet physically given it to me before returning my original ball, I feel she would have been within her rights to keep the replacement as ownership hadn't been transferred over to me through the act of giving So am I the jerk update.

My girlfriend and I are currently reading the comments together and we're having an absolute laugh.

We didn't anticipate such a high volume of responses over one thousand.

At this point, she feels validated.

There were definitely lots of points for us and me in particular, to reflect on.

I can't get back to everybody, but I will be responding to as many as I can in the next few days.

Also, not that it matters much, but the volleyball is worth ninety Canadian dollars to those mentioning autism or mental health issues.

I've already had some concerns over being on the spectrum before.

Categories and the pedantics are things I worry and stress about very often, much more than those around me.

Thank you for pointing that out and making room for this in the conversation.

Perhaps this is worth me looking into further.

You're the jerk.

This relationship sounds exhausting.

You're the jerk for making me read the Tale of the Volleyball a trial in three acts, and you're wrong.

Obviously your item was lost, it was found, You get your old item back.

Everyone's happy except you.

Apparently.

This isn't like if you ordered something on Amazon it got lost.

They sent you a replacement and your original item came and they told you to keep both.

This is your girlfriend, though maybe not for long.

I'm extremely impressed you read that in its entirety.

I only got through the first couple of paragraphs and vaguely skin the rest of the saga.

Something something, I'm keeping all the toys and you can't have any something something, Opie.

I cannot Imagine how tedious you must be in real life.

Your poor girlfriend must feel like she's presenting a defense before the Supreme Court every time she makes the slightest error.

Your girlfriend already indemnified you by replacing your volleyball with one of equal value.

Indemnification does not equal excess.

However, you don't get to earn something on top of the replacement, which you would if you kept both balls.

You're the jerk.

Your girlfriend made a mistake, immediately rectified the situation, and made the very reasonable assumption she'd get to have the excess the second ball since it was not needed by you.

Your argument isn't logically sound.

You know someone's a high level of redditor when they use.

In words like indemnification.

Oh come on, Karen.

Not everyone can be uncultured swine like us.

Am I the jerk for not allowing my neighbor to use my driveway.

I thirty four female, have been living in my current house for about four years.

It's a lovely neighborhood and I generally have a great relationship with my neighbors.

However, there's one neighbor, Dave forty five, male, who has been causing some issues lately, and I need some perspective on whether or not I'm the jerk here.

Dave and his family moved into the house next door about a year ago.

They have a narrow driveway that can fit only one car, and their house doesn't have much street parking available.

This hasn't been a problem until recently, when Dave started hosting large gatherings at his house.

During these gatherings, Dave's guests would park their cars on the street, which would quickly become overcrowded.

As a result, some of his guests started using my driveway without asking for permission.

Initially, I let it slide because I didn't want to cause any conflict.

However, it began happening more frequently, and on a few occasions I'd be unable to move my own car when I had to go to work or leave for my own business, forcing me to go to Dave's house and play a guessing game for someone to move their car.

I decided to address the issue with Dave, explaining that I didn't mind his guests occasionally using my driveway, but I would appreciate it if he could ask for permission first.

Dave seemed understanding and apologized for the inconvenience.

However, the situation didn't improve.

Dave continued to host gatherings and his guests continued to use my driveway without permission.

I decided to take matters into my own hands and placed a no parking sign in my driveway along with a polite note asking Dave's guests to respect my property, also with a warning that I'd have their vehicles towed.

Last weekend, Dave hosted another party and his guests were forced to find alternative parking due to the sign.

Dave confronted me, saying I was being unreasonable and that I should be more accommodating to his guests.

He argued that it was just for a few hours and that I was creating unnecessary tension in the neighborhood.

I stood my ground, explaining that I had tried to address the issue politely and that my drive boy is my private property.

I added that he should have respected my request for permission and made better arrangements for his guests parking.

Ever since then, me and Dave have not spoken to each other, with him and his family most of the time shooting me a bad luck.

So am I the jerk for not allowing my neighbor to use my driveway for his guests, despite having tried to address the issue politely.

Your whole question.

Boils down to Am I the jerk for wanting to be able to go to work, run errands, and leave in case of an emergency, even if it might inconvenience someone attending a party I wasn't invited to.

No, you are not the jerk for not wanting to be stuck at your house when a neighbor hosts parties you weren't invited to.

Am I the jerk for refusing to get in the car with my mom.

I'm twenty eight, female, thirty three weeks pregnant, high risk, and on modified bed rest.

I can still do moderate exercises and run errands, but mostly I'm meant to be sitting with my feet up all day so I don't get sick again.

My doctor okayed me to continue doing my mile walks.

My mom and I went to our local park that had a walking path.

She drove her car.

We got about one eighth mile from the car, and I mentioned thinking of changing the name I'd picked for the baby.

It's been an issue between her and I.

I had settled on a name, but in the last couple of weeks it began to feel like the wrong name.

I've been trying out a few names.

She's frustrated by my inability to pick one.

Anyway, I mentioned this, wanting to change the name, and she had a visceral reaction.

She growled, threw her hands in the air, yelled at me, and turned around and started storming off.

I didn't realize what she was doing, so I just stood there and watched.

I thought she was going to turn and come back.

Instead, she stormed to the car, got in, and drove away.

Even if I had realized what she was doing, I couldn't have caught up with her.

I can only waddle these days.

I walked back to the parking lot, thinking she was coming back and just messing with me.

But five minutes passed and she was still gone.

My leggings don't have pockets, so I didn't have my phone with me.

I went inside the community center, and fortunately there were some ladies setting up for something, and I asked if I could borrow a cell phone.

I figured my mom would in answer, so I called my grandfather, who lives ten minutes from the park.

He said he'd be right there to get me.

About the time my granddad parked, my mom pulled back into the lot.

She asked me.

Why I called my grandfather instead of her, and I told her that she left me in a park without a cell phone, so I borrowed someone's and called the only number I had memorized that I knew would pick me up.

Mom told my granddad she was sorry we had bothered him and that she had taken me home.

I told her I wasn't getting in the car with her, and she was crazy if she thought I was.

She asked why, and I told her, you left your eight and a half month, high risk pregnant daughter in a park without a cell phone on an eighty five degree day over something as stupid as naming a baby that isn't even due for another seven weeks.

She won't even know her own name for months.

It literally doesn't even matter yet, but you let it become a whole drama.

My granddad drove me home.

He gave my mom a stern talking to when we got there.

Mom is now walking around acting like she's the victim because I embarrassed her.

She said I should have just got in the car with her.

She's only offered a half attempted apology, but it was more of a sorry you feel the way you do apology and not a real one.

She says, I'm overreacting.

I'm writing this with the intent of showing her, so I'll accept whatever judgment comes my way.

If I overreacted, I want to know it.

Edit she did not know that I didn't have my phone.

Am I the jerk?

Not the jerk?

If your mom flips out this much before the baby is born, think long and hard on if you want to deal with that and more when the baby's coming and after it's born, and decide if you want that in you and your baby's life.

Am I the jerk for telling my coworker to stop using my personal belongings?

So I twenty eight female, have been working at this small software company for about three years now, and I genuinely love my job.

I have great coworkers and the work environment is generally positive.

However, there's this one coworker, let's call her Sarah.

She's thirty two, who has been increasingly crossing boundaries.

A bit of background.

Sarah joined the company around a year ago and we were initially friendly we would have lunch together occasionally and chat about random things.

I didn't think much of it, and it seemed like a normal office friendship.

However, over time I noticed that Sarah had started to use my belongings without asking for permission.

For example, she would take my stapler, pens, or even my phone charger without asking.

At first, I brushed it off as her just being forgetful and not realizing that these were my personal items.

I tried to be understanding and not let it bother me, but then things started to escalate.

One day, I brought in a special lunch I had prepared as a treat for myself.

It was a dish that my grandmother used to make for me, and it had a lot of sentimental value.

I had placed it in the fridge with a note clearly stating it was mine.

When lunchtime came around, I discovered that Sarah had taken and eaten my lunch.

I confronted her, and she apologized, claiming that she thought it was meant for the whole office to share.

I didn't buy it, but I let it go to avoid causing the scene.

Over the next few months, Sarah's behavior continued to worsen.

She began using my personal laptop without asking, even though we all have our own work computers.

She would also use my coffee mug and other personal items, despite me having my name on them.

I tried to address it politely and asked her to stop, but she would just laugh it off and say she didn't mean any harm.

Finally I reached my breaking point last week.

I had bought a new, expensive pair of headphones to use at work, and I had left them on my desk overnight.

When I arrived the next day, I found Sarah using them at her desk.

I was furious and asked her to hand them over immediately.

She tried to play it off as a joke, but I had enough.

I told her that it was not funny and that she needed to stop using my personal belongings without permission.

I said it was disrespectful and a violation of my privacy.

The rest of the office heard the emotion, and some of my coworkers agreed with me, while others said I was overreacting and should let it go.

Sarah hasn't spoken to me since, and the atmosphere has become tense.

A few coworkers have even suggested that I owe Sarah an apology for embarrassing her in front of everyone.

So am I the jerk for telling my coworker to stop using my personal belongings?

Not the jerk?

The headphones and lunch were yours and not hers.

While I would argue using a stapler isn't harmful, it just adds to everything else.

What is most irritating about her seems to be she tries to laugh it off and carry on like she hasn't done anything wrong.

Don't apologize, wait for her to do that, Not the jerk.

Speak to your manager and or HR.

The stapler and even the charger are kind of reasonable, but the lunch, your personal laptop, and your headphones are completely out of order.

Am I the jerk for not giving up my office to be my wife's craft room.

I recently brought this issue up with a few friends of mine, and after disagreeing on whether I was in the wrong, suggested I post here some backstory.

I twenty five male, met my wife twenty six female, six years ago during college.

We got married after dating for two years because of visa issues.

On her side.

Shortly after, I inherited the house we live in now for my grandparents.

Ever since then, we've lived here together.

I started a new job last year that allowed me to work from home most days.

Soon after, I turned our main guest room.

Into my office.

It's just slightly smaller than our master but has no end suite.

I admit I could have moved into one of the smaller rooms, but was somewhat excited to have my own space, complete with a three monitor desk, set up, a comfy couch, and several shelves of figurines I've collected and painted.

As part of my job coding, I often pace around the room for ideas, and looking at these shelves that take up about half the room gives me a lot of joy.

Recently, my wife, who is a very creative person and has dozens of crafty hobbies that she jumps in between, outgrew her craft room that we set up soon after moving here.

It's about half the size of our current office.

We also have both a large guest bedroom and another similar size small room that we currently used mostly as storage.

I recommended she used the small room to set up a secondary desk in storage.

I figured this could be nice since she often has several projects going on at once and would have to store one away for the others.

She, however, insists that a bigger room would be the only real choice.

Whilst at first I tried to dissuade her from using the guest room since there's no way we can cram all the furniture in one of the small rooms, and I'm also worried about when we have guests over and their comfort.

She seemed very happy with the decision.

However, yesterday insisted that I moved my office into one of the smaller rooms and let her have my current room so that our guests wouldn't have to sleep in a small space.

I disagreed vehemently, since I spent fifty hours a week in my office and have spent countless hours decorating it the exact way I wanted it.

I also actually is the extra space to be more effective and focused.

Obviously, now my wife is very angry with me and says the only thing that will calm her down is if I give her the bigger room.

I don't think this is something I can budge on, so read it.

Am I the jerk, not the jerk?

You work fifty hours a week in the room guests would sleep there infrequently, and I don't know how many hours a week your wife would spend on her hobby.

Not the jerk, this is your workspace for your income.

She's being unreasonable.

I called the police on my neighbor after she keeped my car because of the books that I write.

I'm a single woman in my early thirties making my living writing and self publishing fiction novels.

The genre I write has a majority of the plot being steamy, so I typically don't tell people what I write, but I do tell them I write books for a living under a pen name, and if you're questioning my writing abilities, I have an editor to correct my mistakes.

I'm not hiding it per se, but I'm not telling everyone I meet what I do for a living.

And none of my neighbors knew, only a bunch of friends.

I live in a house alone.

Pretty much all of my neighbors are either young families or retired couples.

My next door neighbor is a young couple.

We've been polite to each other, but haven't been close or anything lately.

The husband, let's call him Roger, became very friendly towards me, which I tried to ignore.

But he's been getting too flirty from my liking, and I started to avoid him.

They had a barbecue over the bank holiday weekend and I was taking rubbish out to put in my beIN.

Roger looked at me, waved high, and whispered something to his friend, and they both watched me very carefully, which was incredibly creepy.

On my way through my garden, I saw Roger's wife, Dahlia, leaving the house with her friend, and they both looked at me with disgust and whispered something to each other.

It was weird, and I hurried back inside.

The next morning, I found some religious leaflets put through my letter box.

They were just printed on normal printer paper and warning about sinful behavior and going to heck et cetera.

Threw them away, but kept finding similar leaflets put through my letter box for the next week.

Since I'm working from home, I decided to see who's leaving these leaflets, and.

To my surprise, it was Dahlia.

I decided to confront her and ask her to stop putting religious leaflets through my door.

Despite me being polite, she was not happy.

She told me that I should rethink my life because what I write is disgusting.

It's pretty vanilla, and she found her husband secretly reading it at night.

She kept going on and on, how I'm going to heck, how I have no morals, et cetera.

Well, I told her to stay away from me and discuss this with her husband, and I closed the door in her face.

Don't know who, but someone told them what I do for a living.

A day later, I found an insult painted on my door.

A few days later I caught her key in my car.

She was almost done with another insult.

Well, I called the police honor, and since I installed cameras after this incident, she's been taken to court over keen my car.

I talked to my other neighbor, she asked about the police about it, and she told me that I went overboard, that Dahlia was clearly insecure.

But she's a lovely woman and a great mother, and I should have talked to her instead of calling the police and given her a chance to change her behavior.

Am I the jerk for calling the police and not giving Dahlia a chance?

If she's key in your car and painting rude names on your door, she is not a lovely woman just because she doesn't like what you write, doesn't give her the right to destroy your property.

It appears that the behavior was escalating, so getting the police involved was necessary.

Not the jerk?

Am I the jerk for saying I'm not going to take care of my pregnant girlfriend's baby when he's born.

I met my girlfriend several months ago.

On our like fourth date, she told me that she was pregnant from her ex.

I've been told by friends and family that I should have left at that point, but I was really dumb and really desperate at that time because it was my first relationship, so I wasn't really thinking and I went along with a relationship with her.

I loved her.

She was like a perfect match for me and other stuff.

However, it wasn't until this month that things started to be a big problem.

My girlfriend started talking to me about paying for some baby stuff and what are ex spectation was for me once the baby was born.

We originally had an agreement that it was only going to be her and her ex.

He's still around, He's not a deadbeat that would be taking care of the baby.

However, she told me recently that her ex was out of a job and doesn't even have a car and is tight on money, so she expects me to help pay for the stuff that she needs like diapers, baby clothes, and whatever.

I said.

Forget that I did not agree to that.

I might change a diaper a couple of times or feed him once or twice, but I'm not going to be fully taking care of him what on earth, especially not spending money on baby stuff like I barely have money myself.

I'm nineteen years old.

By the way, she got mad because I said I wasn't going to help her buy baby things and help her take care of the baby after he's born.

This was a big argument that lasted for a long time.

Am I the jerk here?

I'm going to probably go against the grain here, but I'm going with not the jerk.

As a single mom, I don't expect anyone to step up and care for my kid.

That's mine and her father's job.

I will come positive male role models in her life, and if they want to do extra for her, then I'm extremely grateful for those actions, but I absolutely do not expect them to fund any part of her life or take on a parent role.

Yep, not the jerk.

Oh PI.

She may have really liked you, but she was also looking for someone to take her dead beat X's place, and yes, he is a dead beat, no matter what he says he's going to do.

When the baby is born, your girlfriend will stop being available to you and will be full time taking care of a newborn baby.

If you stick around, you will be pulled into sharing responsibility, and as soon as you've established a pattern of taking responsibility for the kid, you can in some states in the US not sure where you are, be made legally responsible for child support.

Even if you leave, you're going to essentially lose your girlfriend to her baby, and you're going to risk being sucked into child support for life.

If you stick around, do both of you a favor and get.

Out of her life.

You're the jerk.

Look if you ain't mad enough to be a father to that baby, then quit wasting this girl's time.

You make it very clear that you you only want her for one reason, and that reason is not to help her with anything important in her life.

I've dealt with plenty of guys like you until I finally found the right one who didn't mind that I have four kids with different dads.

My new man provides for all of us because he is a real man who makes real money.

He also agreed to not marry me on paper so that I can stay getting my benefits for me and my kids.

He even doesn't mind me getting with some of my exes now and then because he is secure in our relationship.

I know he ain't happy about it, but he knows it's important to me, so he doesn't try to stop me.

He respects my strong independence and never tries to man explain anything to me.

Let this girl go so she can find out real man, cause boy, you ain't cutting it.

Won't replace a brand new broken lawnmower, but will let me return and reorder.

Okay.

So I bought a riding lawnmower a few years ago from a big home store.

I paid for delivery, and upon said delivery, it didn't start.

The delivery truck had left by the time I had gotten gas in it and figured this out, so I called the store.

I explained that my brand new, just delivered today lawnmower was not starting, and immediately the person on the phone asked me if I purchased the extended warranty.

I hadn't, so they told me that it would cost one hundred dollars to have them come get the lawnmower and then, however much more the repairs were.

Mind you, it was brand new.

In my mind, they should bring me a new one to replace the one that didn't work upon delivery.

No matter how much I argued, this worker was sticking to their story.

I quickly changed my tactic and asked what the return policy was.

As long as a return was initiated within thirty days, I could have a full refund, including the cost of delivery, and the store would come pick up the lawnmower for me at no additional cost.

So I pointed out that the store wouldn't replace my non working item by taking one trip to my house to pick up the non working one and bring me one that worked, and instead would make two trips to pick up the one that didn't work and then bring me the new one I purchased the second time as a totally different transaction.

The worker said yes, and when I tried to point out how that made no sense, he didn't want to hear.

So right then and there, I initiated a refund.

I then immediately ordered a new one and had him set up the delivery date after that date was set, we had to schedule the date for pickup of the old mower, and I made myself unavailable for any date other than the delivery date for the new one.

So, even though he had insisted they wouldn't just bring me a replacement mower and pick up the first one, they were now doing just that, but with the additional paperwork of processing return and additional paperwork for delivery of the new more The manager called me later that day to apologize for the hassle, and they ended up waiving my delivery fee.

I worked at a lows in customer service.

It's atrocious, but I can confirm that this type of crap is common.

Most systems aren't set up to process what you need done.

We literally had to return and then sell a new one to set up delivery.

Quite often we had set up in exchange with a delivery and then just swap out the items.

Odds are that person was never trained for an exchange sale.

Ninety percent of the store I worked at wasn't trained on doing one.

Heck, a good ninety percent weren't trained to do a return at all.

Am I the jerk for deciding to separate our finances just because my wife refused to buy a pair of ear rings for my daughter.

My wife and I have one daughter from a previous marriage.

Each Mine is called pen she's fifteen, and hers is Amy, she's seventeen.

We've been married for ten years now.

Our finances are joint because we don't care for money.

She makes seventy to eighty thousand and I make one hundred eighty K to two hundred K per year.

She's in charge of our finances.

My wife has the weird fixation on having the kids earn their stuff, and while I agree both of our daughters are well behaved, good students, and kind, I don't see why they have to earn every single thing daily.

For example, if my daughter is working in the kitchen at night and goes to sleep without putting her laptop away because she'll work again in the morning, then my wife decides that she can't eat anything.

Sweet that day.

I've voiced with better words that I find it stupid.

Same goes for her daughter.

She's prone to forget things easily, and if she doesn't remember to put this or that thing away, my wife removes her phone or tees tablet.

Yesterday was my day off and I stayed back home resting while my wife and our kids went out to buy my mother in law mother's Day gift.

Around five pm, my daughter came to my room and said that my wife bought Amy a necklace and when she asked for a pair of ear rings she loved.

My wife refused because the night before she stayed up until late watching Netflix when she knows she's not supposed to.

This isn't the first time my wife refuses to buy my daughter things, and honestly, it boils my blood.

My daughter is a really good kid.

I work hard to make sure my family has every or most of the things they want, just for my wife to tell them no because they are kids being kids.

When my wife came into our room, I was honest.

I said that her rule was utterly stupid and I was done putting up with that.

That I don't particularly like her buying one thing for her daughter while the other had nothing, and that until she accepts to attend therapy with me and fix the problem, our money will be taken care of separately, and the joint account will be for the house and emergency matters only.

This means she now has to pay half of the utilities and some other things.

She didn't like it because her money will be cut short and implied I was financially mistreating her by doing this over a pair of ear rings.

She went to her parents, and my father in law called me soon after.

He said I was a jerk and that it was my obligation to provide for my family.

ETA.

I might not have explained myself.

I'm still paying most of our joint expenses, like sixty to seventy percent.

But before this, my wife kept almost all her money to herself and only put toward the emergency fund we set.

Still, I put a bigger amount.

She's not happy about us separating our finances because this means she has to contribute to the house now and she'll have less money for her daughter's college fund and her fun ETA two.

Thanks for all your replies and comments.

I'll try to read all of them and we'll be answering some.

I also want to thank you for all of your advice.

My wife still refuses to do therapy, and as some of you said, this will be my hill to die on.

If she doesn't agree by next Wednesday, I'm sure we will divorce.

Someone also asked for our ages.

I'm thirty six mail and she's forty five female.

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