Love it or leave it?

Who is the best celebrity you ever dated it?

Oh?

Okay, we're gonna have to leave that one.

Okay, who was the worst celebrity you have a date?

Answer that you still?

Was that on the mother List?

Are you made that up?

On the list?

It is on air?

Worst?

What's up?

Y'all's your girl?

Les p?

And?

Is your girl drinking?

The call?

And you are tuned in?

So I episode of Poor Mine where speaks sober thought?

We got a guest today?

We got a guest today.

Well, first off, let me say I am super excited to have this person on the couch with us today because I love somebody who just always stays relevant and the queen of reinvention, child and pivoty.

We have the original influencer, the original social media personality, model, reality TV star, and as of recently, your new favorite streamer.

Okay, yeah, love and about it.

That's a nice love it.

Thank you for joining us.

I'm here.

Yes, I'm excited to have you.

I'm so excited.

Thank you.

All Right, So your resume is extensive, very very I.

Feel like I've done a lot too.

I feel like I've live like ten lives.

Could you act too.

Yes, I act to all of it.

Thank you.

And I think it's so crazy because like you have, like you said, lived so many lives, but we you started really young.

Yeah, like when you were on Tumblr.

Let's I said, I want to start from the beginning, Like how did the tumblr thing come about?

So for me, Tumblr came about because I have an older sister.

Her name is Crystal.

Shout out to my sister Crystal.

We're two years apart, and she was the one that loved taking pictures.

That was her thing.

I was really into skateboarding, like always had like a tomboy era and I was just was like, man, but I'm watching my older sister all the time, and I'm like I could probably do that.

Yeah.

So she taking pictures of me, I'm taking pictures of her.

I had MySpace and my Space went to Tumblr, so I'm like, okay, well, I'm uploading my pictures organic just in the grocery store bag of chips, swagged out outfit at the time, whatever, and They're just going up like it was organic to the point where like I didn't even know what I was doing.

I just wanted to like kind of following my sister's footsteps like she was the tumbler.

I want to be a tumbler girl.

Yeah, and then that turned into like, oh shit, But everything in my life has been like not necessarily in my plans, it's just something that I'm just organically doing.

I'm taking a liking into taking pictures.

I'm taking a liking into photography and shit like that, and I'm just doing it and people are gravitating towards me and it.

So it's been a blessing that I just get to live and try to like new things and it's like works out for me.

Yes, because I mean, you have to have an it factor, like you can just be a pretty face.

So I always say that, like to be relevant for so long.

Yeah, and it's more than you know, obviously you're beautiful, but it's more than the looks, Like it's a lot of pretty women, like what else.

Absolutely, I say that all the time, like it's so many beautiful women.

But that's why I go out of my way to try not to box myself, Like I'm not just gonna be an actress or a streamer, Like I'm gonna try to get my hand in every bag while I can, while I'm relevant, while I have people who actually give a fucking care to like, look at me.

I'm gonna try to do every right, like and see what I'm good at, see what's six and if I'm not, I'm gonna try something.

Yeah, I mean, I in going back kind of to what you said earlier, because I do feel like when people talk about like the OG influencers on social media, You're always the first person that comes to my mind, Like I feel like you're the OG influencer before it was the thing.

I feel like you were people's mood board.

Yeah, it was like they were trying to dress like their hair, like you all that stuff.

And I'm not gonna lie quiet as it's kept.

My favorite era of yours is like when you randomly popped out and started doing music.

Oh yes, because it wasn't like she, I mean she worked with Will I am like the would like she was just doing stuff and it's like who gets to just wake up and be like, I'm gonna go to the studio where I am right, you know what I'm saying.

Shout out to where I am Exacinitely his big one for me.

I started off being his brand ambassador.

Yeah, Apple head Phones.

So I was on the box.

I'm going on tour with him to tell Apple stories about the box.

He reached out to me on Instagram type thing like we like fell in line that way.

So then boom we're on tour telling talking about the headphones.

And then like he one night was just like, you know, I see more in you.

You've probably seen yourself, Like would you care to try to do music?

And I'm like why not?

Why not?

I love music.

I never see myself being a rapper, being a singer or nothing, but like I have an immaculate music taste.

I'm very much like Broad.

I'm a human juke box, Like I know music, So why not try it?

Shiit Like you know what I'm saying.

I don't like put limitations on anything I do.

I love that because I feel like you try stuff, you never know what's gonna pop.

Off for you, you know what I mean?

Working out, Yeah, we was talking about you, me saying we gonna make a song.

We could be like, yeah, I want him.

Wonder why you are the hook and you are the verse?

Okay because your voice everybody gonna go sing along because you got that melodic type voice.

That the street, She got that ear.

Okay, so talk about I want to kind of fast forward to now because I feel like, you know, obviously I'm older than you, so but I'm always not got my ear to the streets.

So I have been watching you on like the stream well I won't say watching.

I see the clips.

Auntie a little too old for twitch.

I don't be knowing what's going on, but.

I love the fact that you have just started this new like wave and like you just like kind of popped out of nowhere with the streaming.

I was like, I don't know Indied was streaming, you know, And I think now people are seeing your personality because I feel like when you did reality TV it was like a different you are still kind of shy with your personality, but now I'm like, okay, this girl is funny.

Yeah, you know, all reality TV stuff is always edited.

It's always a little script razzle dazzled to like reality TV in some way, shape or form.

So like I was looking for it and literally praying for a platform and an opportunity to where it just happens organically.

I tried to force the YouTube thing, and it's like still with YouTube, you have to I want to sit with the editor I can't just hire an editor and blah blah blah.

I like to see myself, know exactly what I'm saying, cut it out, Like I'm very hands on with everything.

So it just like I tried to stop, stop stop.

So when Twitch came about, I'm a viewer.

I was a viewer at first, like I wasn't watching people, but I was like, oh, Kai Sinnati was just like maximizing the world at that point of just knowing what Twitch was, so I'm like, yeah, okay.

Then I started.

I have nephews and nieces.

And they're super into it at first, so I'm like, okay, let me just see what it's aunty, unty, you want to you know what I'm saying.

And as I started gaining more information, I'm like, this is exactly what I need.

All I need is just to press go live and do what you want to do with the clips, do what you want to do, like I don't want, I need raw uncut like I can't.

It takes too much to do editing and shit like that, and to be honest, that's how you build a strong community of people because like you can't fake Twitch, you can't fake being on live and like unless you walk away, take the camera away, and shit like that.

But it's like when they see you doing your thing, like it's just a vulnerable space of like you sitting there knowing me.

From a fall on the wall perspective.

Yeah, which is cool to me because that's literally what I needed, because it's like I can't force y'all to get to know me or see me in a different light.

I can't force it.

I can't no matter how many youtubes I put out and say, hey you guys, I'm actually a good person, You're never gonna believe me.

Right, So it's like if I got twitched and you could just see me living my life how I live it and how I conduct myself, maybe you can get to know me better enough to know I'm not such a bad person.

Right.

Does that make you nervous?

So, like just with it being live and the fact that you can't cut hit it anything, Yeah, it makes me nervous, But like at the same time, like it is what it is, and like everybody has moments where like you fuck up, everybody has moments where it's like I'm just not afraid to put it on front street, like I could be judged for ridiculed whatever the fuck is just.

Been that Like I've been judging my whole life.

Yeah, why stop now?

Who cares?

Right?

So, because I saw something like because y'all did, like where y'all were like the studs and y'all went out.

It was so quickly.

Yeah, shout out to Brooklyn.

It was so funny y'all was going out like hitting on girls and doing that.

But then you know, when you have ideas and stuff like that, it's funny.

I saw it was another streamer who was like, oh my gosh, she copied my idea.

Yeah, so when things like that happen, like, how do you handle it?

Because that's a different world.

That is a different world, But it's best to not handle it at all.

Just don't say nothing, especially when you're not like it's not the truth, like I never seen her DM, I never seen that girl, like none of that.

So it's like you making up and carrying a whole story off my name because you want me to respond and you want the people to like, oh, I'm not gonna give.

It to you.

It's not the truth, and it's gonna and then the people from your community on life, they're gonna start pulling up old clips and DM they gonna do the work for you and be like, hey, you know what she been talking about?

That shit?

Actually she said like put it together.

Yeah, you got to say and do too much.

It's really the truth.

Them clippers be making money.

They do.

They make a lot of money.

That's Sally the ones with the wrong captions saying oh my god.

Yes.

That's another thing that you have to be strong enough to deal with on Twitter is you never know the narrative they're going to write and try to paint with the clips they got, Like literally they're gonna stay and do whatever for somebody to watch it, click it and just you know whatever.

It would be the craziest, most outlandish caption.

And it's like you strong enough to be like, are you gonna be in the commentation?

This is not true.

It's not me.

Do you feel like you've always been that way like this whole time or do you think it's something that has come with maturity.

Age as one thousand percent came with maturity and age.

I used to crash out, like really silently, not silently.

I used to cry, I scratch my face up.

I used to freaking cut myself, like I really off the ship that like internet hate, I don't understand.

It's just like bro what And like as a since I know, I've been on someber since I was like fifteen years old.

Yeah, so like fifteen and up, my platform or whatever the case, maybe grew bigger and bigger and bigger, and with that comes more and stronger haters.

That's like, uhh, this little girl should just be like it's just a whole bunch of that.

But I was still continuing to push.

But like if it wasn't for God, my mom and like just like learning through like YouTube sermons and like just educating myself on the topics that I'm feeling at the time.

I'm that type of person.

I'm a human sponge, Like I need to soak up as much game as I can to like.

Fuel my mind.

It's like I don't want to think the wrong thoughts and get negative with you because that's where God is going to be disappointed right to do that.

But I also think Twitch is different too, because that's.

A young're you're not even probably though low key Yeah, when I played my oldies and shit like so many people and be like.

Like that's my ship I'm like, damn yeah, and brothers.

It's not all kids.

It depends on like who you bring to your community.

You know, like you organically going from this and potentially going to Twitch, like your people is gonna make a Twitch and watch you and be in there and like with the gen z situation community as well, and you know those kids, but like you still have your core people that's rocking with you and goes with every platform you do.

Okay, sure, that's how I always looked at I'm like, I don't want to talk to them kids.

I mean, but I feel like it's we need a thing, like you have different age groups because you have people in our age groups to that they love Twitch, like being on Twitch, doing.

The live streaming.

That's like the thing right now.

I think everybody is always trying to like catch on to what's news.

Yeah, and you're saying, like I don't entertain them kids, Like it's not that it's like how you sit on YouTube and do this.

It's like they want to see you day in the life shit, Like they don't want you to do childishit.

You don't gotta do childis shit for clips.

That's where you become and get clowned out.

You want to get clouned out for the clips, but you could be organically you and then they'll clip it up and make it like, Okay, this is the type of content she does God as a beauty girl, Like you know, they look for stuff like.

That, right, Not all about that?

Well, I guess like the clips I be seeing, like I don't know whose stream it was.

I can't remember it was Like a lot of times it happens though.

The girls will be there and trying to like get in the camera and get attention, and I'll be feeling so bad for them because them comments be eating them up, and I'll just be like, oh my gosh, girl, please just sit down, because it is not oh they.

Be yoh my diabolical for sure.

But you got to be a strong minded person and you got to know who you are, and you know who you are, and you got to know that people have their own opinion.

It's gonna run with it regardless.

You can make nobody feel no type of way and say nothing.

All you can do is conjunct yourself.

How you know you want to let them do whatever?

Yeah, not about that.

Yeah, And then we got to talk about the stream Awards.

Shit, oh my god, because they said you had your Kanye West moment and they was like, what is going on?

So was that plan or was that really like you was feeling it in the moment.

I was feeling it in the moment.

It was a drinks.

That's why I'm straight fast right now.

It's just too many pat on the wrist, India, You're doing too much.

And as a grown lady like you gotta know like, okay, it's too many times, you're doing too much ship and I understand that.

But now that I'm in a twitch row and the public eye is not so regular people, it's like, no, you said you were gonna stop thinking, so stop drinking.

Everybody conducts, you know, everybody's different.

You know, because I'm talking to God with this.

You're a part of it.

You see it.

But like you and God know what's going on.

So don't judge me too hard.

But I definitely know for a fact like that was because I was too intoxicated off the drinks.

And what happened was literally like verbet, what is it?

Yeah, let's.

B E R B A T I amb I thought she was going to say v E.

R correct chat, I'm cucking out.

That's a strong point.

Everything else is the So long story short.

I'm at the awards.

I'm going table to table to table because it's like, it's not much going on, so I'm just hey, you always up mingling, mingling Mangland.

Got there a little late because I had a dress dressed mountain function.

My shit split right down the ass.

Get another dress.

It was a lot going on, but I still push because I really wanted to go.

I wanted to be apart.

Got their leg moving around, drinking, having a good time.

What kind of drinks is?

Then it was nice, what's that y'all?

Let me take y'all pictures having a good time?

You know.

Boom.

Get to the point where I'm on the side the awards is like maybe twenty thirty minutes to be over.

I don't fucking know because I got kicked out anywhere.

I only kicked you out for real, real, But let me get to it.

Okay, Yes, I thought all of it was just like.

No, no no, no, no no no, let's not safe.

I don't like.

No.

It was a lot, but you know, I was out of pocket.

But anyways, so long story getting longer.

I went over there and I talked to Rakay on the break time.

I'm like, Rikay, his demeanor, his head, his head, mind you I got nephews and nieces.

I got like fourteen nephews and nieces.

So I see.

When the child's like confidence is broken.

He had a hell of a year.

He went viral so many times, Like Rakai was like the biggest thing of twenty twenty five.

In my eye.

And I didn't like seeing him like that.

I'm like you hear me, like you know you do one like blah blah blah.

He like yeah, like you know, it just didn't sit well with my spirit.

And I was off the alcohol and I'm like, hold on, no, I'm not just not shaking.

I'm just not shaking my spirit.

I sat down in my chair.

Boom, black Boy Max his homies right there say like facing me, I'm like, I don't like how Rikai like, I don't like how he feels right now.

I should say something?

Yeah?

They like, yeah, what you mean like getting all inside.

You egging it all?

You have me on?

Yeah, I'm not scared of shit.

Yeah, but a motherfucking word, especially off the drink.

So I'm over there, like should I?

They like, what you mean is twitch like you know, it's for the clips go marble.

So once I hear that, I'm like, drink.

Nigga said, oh your drink right there?

What did I do that?

Sound like me like you hold on real minute.

I went down there, boom boo, boom boom boom talking to the little people on the side.

They saying, I'm like, you look so good girl.

The ladies up there okay, and coming up next she walks off, I'm like, do do.

Hi?

Everybody blah blah blah blah, everybody.

Out of me.

Huh.

So as I got up there, it's when I said what I said, which is like, you know, respect to adap, but blah blah blah blah blah, which again like wasn't my place, wasn't my time, And that's why I apologize.

So many people were so mad at me for apologizing, and I'm like, yeah, I'm not gonna lie.

If somebody did that to me, I would be very upset.

I would not feel like that was a cool thing to do.

I don't care who you're taking up for.

It was my personal opinion and that wasn't supposed to be stated on somebody else's stage on a program.

I don't run that program.

That was out of bocket.

So I apologized, but.

In the moment I had that like recurage, I was egg gone.

I was gassed up, and I'm like, shit, you ain't said the words.

You did it for the people.

I'm sorry, ahead, go ahead, go ahead, Well, I was you can go ahead.

Well.

I was just asking how to Rikay feel.

Rakay called me.

He called me probably like that night or the next morning or something, and he was just like he was like, you wasn't scared to do that.

I'm like, no, Like that's really how I felt.

You know.

It was a very innocent moment, like he was like, you know, like my mom's really happy, like she wants your number, like she really appreciated blah blah blah.

And I'm like, look, recaed, like you know what I did.

I did step out of balance and like that wasn't cool with me to do that, but like I wanted you to feel the how we all felt, like the people like what you did, like and when you're a kid, so it's like you got to mold a kid up to have that confidence.

How dare I felt in the moment, how did those people sit there make fun of the crew, go in, go in, and then not give him He went crazy, like yeah, above and beyond what it took to win that.

And that's how I felt in the moment.

And I'm like, nah, everybody gonna hear this ship right now.

That's how I.

Feel, And that's what it is.

He did appreciate it, and I respected him for that.

So it seems like you regret doing it, but you said what you say, No, I.

Don't regret doing that at all.

But I was out of pocket from what I did, but I don't regret doing it.

I know.

That's so good thought.

That you have that level of self awareness, even like kind of circling back to what you were saying earlier about you not drinking, like like, Okay, I know I had too much to drink, so now I'm taking a break.

No too many times?

Yeah, do you think that you're done for good drinking?

Know?

You just taking a little.

I'm definitely taking a long break.

Like I'm not gonna put no numbers on it because everybody's gonna hold you.

But I'm definitely taking a long break, and I have to prove it to myself first.

That like I'm not all what people say I am, because like it's all in the mind thing and it's all for me.

I use alcohol.

It's like I'm a person where like I don't speak unless spoken to.

So when I gotta get on live and get on Twitch and do events and get in front of people, let me just warm up and gas up real quick and get in because drinking makes me happy, like get moved.

I'm like, you know, that's how we all are.

Hide yourself up.

I don't have that self confidence to the maximum to where I don't feel like, you know, I don't need it.

Sometimes I want that little extra liquid and then they keep going and they keep going because it's like, oh I don't feel it, and then smacked my dumb shit.

Man.

And then it's like.

God, but I gotta like prove it to myself, prove it to God.

And that's all I really want to prove it to.

I mean, you know, people out there really just like, oh my god.

But it's like come on now, y'all know, like everybody is doing the same ship just because I'm out here doing it in front of y'all.

And that's what it is.

You have a camera in front of your facts exactly.

People definitely judge you under a harsher light when you have the spotlight.

We all make the same mistakes.

Like you said, it's just the fact that we're kind of living our lives in front of people.

So I feel like it's always so much scrutiny and people be.

Acting like they don't go through the same sit It's crazy.

Now I'm asking you one more question about the streaming work, because IM nosy yet all the clips I saw the host, what was the whost name when she made the diddy joke about Kyle, I can't remember her name.

Cinderella name.

Yeah, So I'm not gonna lie.

I'm not familiar with this this lady y'all know, y'all like the clip ship.

I'm not attacking her like, but I ain't gonna lie.

A lot of the clips that I did see, it seemed like a lot of her jokes weren't landing.

Was it like that or was it there in that half?

I was late to where I walked in when they were on a break, and I didn't hear most of all of those jokes.

Okay, because and thank god I did it because on the.

Tipe to be like what.

Because Kyle like Kayle, you gonna disrespect Kayle like he like you known't come on along, gotta say too much.

He speaks for himself of what he does and what type of person he is outside of Twitch, not even regarding.

Twitch like how he does for his people.

It's like, how dare you sit in people's face that really brought attention to this platform and like trying to like shit on him in a sense in my eyes, But I for sure was not there to hear those jokest out of my own ears.

I've seen the later and was like.

Well, ship, it wasn't that bad how I felt deliver it properly.

She was just kind of like I didn't know too much about her either, Like I was just you know, I was on her to be there a part of her thing.

That's why I'm like, damn I did.

I did apologize.

I reached out to her personally, d m her.

I reached out to adapt personally.

Adapt hit me right away, and it was like it's no problem, I'm not tripping.

I'm like I appreciate that, like you know, like certain times it's just like, you know whatever.

But it was a lot of streamers and I'm not dropping on names.

You know, there's a lot of streamers that threw me off after that shit, like really, especially the ones that just had a lot to say about it.

And I get like, but streaming, a lot of people give the excuse of like, oh, my chat asks me about it, you know, so I'm gonna speak up on it.

But it's like if you a real nigga and you a nigga and you're gonna speak on a female when a female is making mistakes, and that's some goofy, like clown shit to me.

So it's like, it's certain, Its just that I don't respect in the streaming world.

But at the end of the day, I'm here for my journey, my platform.

I can't you know, can I can't help with nobody else?

Do I agree with you on it, But you know, people are corny, and so you obviously to have a name that people know if they're talking about it, it's gonna get more clear, of course.

Yeah, But what does dating look like for you now now that you're like, you know, turning over a new leave, but you know you still want to, you know, because you want to get married one day, right, absolutely, So it's like, what does dating look like for you?

Now?

I turned thirty February third.

You're so young, girl, you are welcome to the thirty twitch the like mind you, this is a twenty nine year old lad.

I'm like, y'all don't want to come up.

With a boy twenty nine is still young.

But I fel like I'm still young now young you.

Know what now when people be like that's young, that's old like Nigga is now, it's no radar.

It's never too.

It's not like an old and young to me, it's like I'm growing in life, like I'm living life, like I cannot you too young?

You too?

It's a lot of little young young girls.

Yeah, like on this like, oh you're too old for that, Like it's no such thing as none of that.

Right, I agree?

I don't know.

And I just feel like no other generation prior to the generation right now, which is gen Z that mainly be like on.

Tweech and stuff.

I feel like us we did not make people that were a little bit older than us feel so old.

It's like we love that.

Yeah over Yeah, I want to say, girl and boy, I'm like you big it's a car yeah, like it was given that now even like.

You, they'd be like, oh, you're twenty three, even twenty three.

I saw a clip recently they were asking high school students and like college students, like, what's old to you?

They was like, anybody that's born before two thousand, it's old.

And I'm like, that's crazy.

That is crazy.

You know what's crazy to me?

When I was younger, I don't know what type of age, maybe like seventeen eighteen or maybe a little before that, I used to feel like, oh, thirty is Oh.

My sisters used to laugh at me.

Yeah, it could be like no, y'all is old, Like y'all up the thirty I'm like, girl, you know how wise and how like yeah, what I am for the rest of my life to go on?

Like this is like the best pivotal point to me ever.

And a lot of millionaires and billionaires start life thirty five forty.

That's when they become hell is successful.

It's like mid thirties, early forties.

So I'm ready to like because now we equip we've done.

A lot of like life.

Yeah, yeah, my thirties, I've been having so much fun in my pers I love you.

The financial freedom that I have, I can do whatever I want, like and then honestly, like, I feel like I have way more confidence now, Like I love the way I look, I love the way I feel, Like, Yes, I'm just loving it.

Like my twenties was a lot of struggle, like working, trying to figure out what kind of guys I like, trying to figure out who I was as a person, finding my personal style.

It's just so much discovering and it's fun.

But now that I'm here and I know who I am, I can really enjoy my life because I understand myself now, yeah, saying it's definitely for me, the mental clarity, like when you turn thirty, it's a switch that goes off, and it's a lot of things that you care about in your twenties that I think when you turn thirty you just don't give a fuck more, Like you realize how pointly cities the streets over.

Yeah, And I think for me that's something that had changed when I turned.

Yeah, I think I got that pre feeling right now, Like I'm two month toy, I'm like, yeah, a lot of the guys that I was even yeah, wasting my time talking to just for entertainment, or just because like I want to be on the phone that shit over it.

It's like I'm working, I got shit to do.

If I'm not doing nothing, I gotta get on stream.

Like people really begged me to get on that bitch, and it's like, I don't do nothing for myself no more.

It's because like it's bigger than me, Like it's way bigger than me.

It's people that's watching that like me to hear certain things through me and it'll register way better than they mama could or whatever, because they were like the person.

So I got to like say, it's not about me, about a lot of things in my life, like yeah, push it just keep going.

And I don't know what it is too, But when you turn thirty, you your sex drive increase so much.

Really, yeah, scared of that.

Yeah it's you should be tall that.

But one of my best friends she actually just turned thirty last year.

She turned thirty one this year, and she told me.

She was like, birl, you told me that when I turned thirty, like my six drive was just gonna increase and go into overdrive.

She was like, and I don't know what the fuck be going on, but I'm always horny she was like, it's just like bad news bears for me.

Really, I've been I've been on a fact.

Remember you asked me, like, what's dating?

Yeah for me, it's no dating for me right now.

Like I've been watching these TikTok lives.

Right her name is Maya Worships.

Shout out to Maya Worships.

He goes on TikTok live at in La time and be like two in the morning.

Okay.

So I've been watching her shit for months or whatever.

And then like she didn't know I was watching when she reached out to me one day and was like, God has a message for me from you know, from through her.

Okay.

So I'm like, okay, well I love your stuff first of all.

How like anytime somebody say that, I'm gonna I'm gonna get eager to hear.

You know, you can't listen to everybody at my like you know, everybody's gonna try to say stuff like that.

But this is somebody that I've been really like every time she speaks about the word, it registers so well with me, Like it's just something I want to go back to every time, like, oh I love I can't I put my notes out like love when she gets on only for an hour.

So she reached out to me and said, God had a message for me.

When I told you it was so on point, like I broke down crime, so on point like.

And she was just like I was afraid to reach out to you because I'm like, God, how is she gonna see it?

Like, you know, like she's somebody big in the world, Like what what do you mean reach out to her?

And she said, I had no idea you was watching my lives this whole time.

That's crazy, so aligned that way.

And then from then what God told me is just like I need you all to myself in this season, I need you to trust me and like me, I like to go be under niggas and when I get used to like fucking with somebody, like gets you used to fucking with them, and then it becomes a toxic, repetitive cycle that like God straight up told me, like I need you to break that because like I got some I got some shit for you behind this, you know, wall just get passive.

So I'm on that journey right now.

I ain't even having enough.

I ain't been dated like that.

I got my friends and people that like I fuck with, but at the same time, like I let them know, this is what's going on in my life.

I'm on this past, I'm on this journey.

I need you to respect it.

If not, I'm gonna keep going my way.

Like and it's not necessarily comfortable for.

Me at all, right, something like I want to turn out, No I can't.

Even God is like, wait, I'm gonna let you turn up on your own.

I'm gonna do it for you over how many times niggas could ever do it for you?

Like, just trust me, Just trust me.

So I'm all right, God, I got you because I feel like when you find the man that's for you, he's gonna respect it.

Anybody that's trying to push you and telling him like I'm on this journey, this is what I'm trying to work on.

It's about me and God and what we got going on.

A man that's for you is gonna understand it.

And I think when you're in a season of like being uncomfortable, like you said, what's behind that curtain, when you finally reach it, it's gonna be like he gonna it's gonna sure.

I love that for you.

I love that so much because certain level of disciplines and they able to do that most people can.

I really that's what I want to work on going into my thirties.

I want to be the most disciplined lady.

I just want to be lady discipline.

I really want to be one of them girls, like I always say, like have an athlete mindset.

Athletes they wake up like six seven in the morning, they gonna work out.

They got a program, they are an agenda.

They don't got time to do nothing else but what they need to do, and it's better in their body, is better than they better in their craft.

Like I want to be on that type of time where it's like I don't got time for nothing else but what I could do to better myself and what I got going on right now.

And one thing that helped me too when I was like going through my journey of like changing it was I wanted to be the woman that the what people perceived me as like.

I didn't want to be the person where you look on my Instagram they're like, oh my gosh, she looks like she has her shit together.

I wanted to actually have my shit together, and.

That's what I feel like.

I'm not fronting on social media.

I really do got my shit together, and it feels so amazing, like ain't nothing out of order over here, Like everything is a line.

So I think that feels good, like really living the life that you present online.

Yeah, sure, you know, And I've never been afraid of showing that shit.

If it's good and I'm good, and if it's not, then shit, maybe you might not hear from me for a little time.

But when I pop back up, I'm gonna go up and do my shit, you know, Like sometimes people judge too hard and do too much.

You gotta really like see what you want to put out there to the world, Like, yeah, it's great to be vulnerable, but like just know like whatever you put out there is whatever, they're gonna scrap and do whatever the fuck they want to do this, So it's like still have your level of privacy.

Which is what I'm learning is it's like not everything not for twitsch twenty five A okay, everybody join my one hundred hour stream, Like nah, sometimes I need to get the moments I need to talk to God.

I need God to hear me privately.

I can't have everything for everybody.

It's not it's not.

Yeah, that's a good point though, because I think you definitely just have to find that balance between having a certain level of vulnerability because your listeners, your followers, they love that, yeah, but then also still keep things that are important to you close to yourself and having their privacy too.

Yeah.

A lot of people don't care about the little happy medium because it's that money.

Yeah, it's like fuck it, I'm gonna exploit it because they're gonna give me up, they gonna click me up, whatever the case may be.

But like now, you gotta really have an agenda.

Like I love streamers that really like have a purpose and like what they're trying to do and like highlighting the good things and not just doing anything.

We're not just going to have a mug bang on camera and shit, we want to get to know people and see different parts of life, like you know, it's all about making shit happen, like in stream in the streaming world.

To me and like my love, I got a whole community on my Twitch.

They caught the love bucks to the love but they give me like categories like streams.

We want India to do things, we want India to talk about, like they don't play by I mean, it's like ten thousand people in that bitch and they giving me ideas.

Right.

So it's like, oh, I got people who really pushing it forward for me.

I got approve like I want to do it for them, you know, in a real community.

I got a real comunity.

And it comes from Twitch though, you know.

So it's like when you got a real community of people who riding for you regardless anything you do in life, anything you sell like, they're gonna be like, no, I'm gonna ride like whatever she's doing, I'm gonna support it.

That's what I'm grateful for about Twitch is being able to build that community of people who like literally want to ride for you and be like your family member and it's gonna take up for you.

In the comments on TikTok that my love bugs go in on people, they don't play about them.

I don't play about them, so I really really appreciate them.

We be getting on live to prayers we don't like it's it's a blessing for George.

I shout out to the love So we want to play a little game with you.

We're going to play a game.

It's called love It or Levy So basically, for each scenario, you choose either you love it, answer honestly, or leave it please the feed.

Okay, so we have a good one.

These are some my god, these are some good ones.

Okay.

So for the first one, you made two million dollars from fans, love it or leaving wit?

What is the role?

So basically like you either talk about it like love it, answer honestly how you feel about it the situation I.

Leave it you don't want to talk about Okay, let's do it again.

Okay.

So first scenario, you made two million dollars from only fans love it?

All right?

That was something that I was intrigued by, Okay, and once you are.

Once i'm intrigued by something, I'm not gonna stop thinking about it.

I'm not gonna leave it alone.

I posted very racy RANTI pictures on my Instagram before, like in my twenties and like early teens and shit like I was just popping it now you know what I'm saying.

But then as time went.

By, I also was like exposed and exploited by somebody, and my news was already out there on the internet.

So my mindset was starting.

My only fans at the time, and this was very immature of me.

It was like, shit, they already seen it already, so shit, why not why not give them like, Okay, now I don't post bikini pictures and I don't post pictures like that on my Instagram.

Go to my only fans and then my only fans.

I've never opened my like, I've never had no crazy ass shit.

It was very much pictures.

You see my nipple a couple of times, you see my ass a couple of times.

But it was very much like I regulated it the way I wanted to, because I know people go crazy with whatever you put out there on the Internet.

But at the time, it was just so much good money.

I'm like, this is boom on this, I'm loving it.

Bikini pictures like it wasn't even shit that was like had to be like all that whatever, and they was going up paying for like tipping all that shit.

I was getting so much money monthly.

I was like really just so happy.

Was on a high.

And then one day my mom caused me crying.

It's just like my little brother got into a fight at school and don't tell him I told you.

But like, guys are like the kids are teasing him about like having your only fans pictures and show that broke me.

I don't even want to cry.

That broke me because like that's my baby, like I raised him, and like the last thing I want him to feel like it's like embarrassed of me, ashamed of what I'm doing anything.

Really like that's to the cord me.

I can't have that.

So when that was my pivotal moment of like, Okay, let's go to God.

God, if I know you hear me, I make so much money on here.

I just need another way.

Lord, just give me another way to make the money I'm making on this platform.

I don't want to do this no more.

I feel like, you know, they send it to my a dmon pictures to my mama, like people was going on in their way to like over they exploit me, you know, and I should expect that because you know, I'm putting out there people buying the content.

But you could do whatever with it after that.

But I didn't think it would hit me.

But you know, God allowed it to happen on purpose, Yeah, said, I got down set a prayer.

I'm like, please allow something else like that could take the place of how much money I was making on there, and I could do that.

Not even like five six, seven months later, I'm on twitch making good money too, making money.

Let me tell you how my twitch journey started.

Its real quick though.

Really I was in Miami just partying with my brother and all them or whatever.

I see DDG and like his whole crew of capital college boys.

I didn't know DG like that at the time, Like I ran into him, like knew of him type thing.

But we wasn't friends or nothing like that before.

So it was just like in Miami, I think March April, like April maybe like aprilish, and we're in Miami.

He comes in, blah blah blah.

We see each other there.

I get back to La.

He hit me like, hey, would you ever would you come on my stream for a Taco Tuesday one day.

I'm like, that's crazy because I just made a twitch.

I want to start streaming, but I, you know, don't know.

The first step.

He like, I got you, like just I'm gonna teach you everything, like, but would you come on?

As I guess it was literally like he like come tomorrow.

I'm like, okay, fuck it, Like I've been saying, I want to do it, so let's do it.

Bloom I did his Taco Tuesday.

I went from zero followers to like five six, seven thousand followers.

People.

Really it was a big splash and that off rip it was just great chemistry.

It was just like it was just a spark that people fucked with grew my community so quick.

I had hell of followers not even a couple of weeks later, maybe a month.

Kai caused me on the phone.

He like, hey, I'm doing this stream university thing.

Mind you.

I was supposed to be on his mafia than too when he did it, and like time didn't sort out and shit like that, so it didn't happen.

So like, but like he's always been cool people to like he reached out or whatever.

He reached out and called me and was like, I'm doing you know, stream university, streamer university.

And like I want you to be on it.

I don't know what type of role you are you are willing to play, but I want you to be a part of it.

Like type shit, mind you.

I only did one stream before that.

I was not a streamer.

I was nothing.

I was just India love on Instagram at that point.

I'm like, sign me up.

What do you mean, I'm gonna give you a whole rundown on anything I could do.

What is it, okay, stream university so I could be teaching a class.

He like, whatever you whatever ideas you have.

Send it.

I send him.

University.

I mean when I tell you, that was nobody but God.

And it was just so it happened so quick right after each other.

That was the biggest splash.

It was just like I got.

Thrown into the sharks with all the real like stream It was like a lot of streaming going on and I didn't know what I was doing, but like I had a lot of help.

I had a lot of people that was like helping me along the way.

DDG was a hell of a help.

Like the whole time, it's just like not knowing anybody really well, and I didn't know him really well, but he went out of his way to like make sure like I knew what I was doing.

So like from there it was just history.

Yes, So shout out to Big k C three the biggest, and shout out to DG because I like y'all really really helped my streaming career.

And I'm always giving shout.

Out to y'all.

Okay, so let's do another one.

Okay, love it or leave it?

Who was the best celebrity you ever dated it?

Oh?

Okay, leave that one?

Okay?

Who was the worst de Liberty?

I want to answer that you was that on the Mother List or you made that up?

It is their worst.

I'm gonna lead at because I don't really like to.

Yeah, okay, what is the friendship between you and Duke Dennis today?

I love it?

He's super cool.

I checked on him.

When you know ship on the internet.

I have empathy for anybody who like has some ship going on where like the internet try to.

Go big and go big on you.

Like I don't like that type of stuff because I know what people go through when it comes to that.

So, like you know, I check on him the last incident he had, but like we don't.

I don't have no like relationship or friendship or I don't talk to him often, but like you know, we have an open line.

Hit me, I hit him and it all right?

Okay, this is the last one.

Is there a brand offer you regret almost saying yes too?

No, I don't, okay, not that I can think of.

Okay, yeah, okay, you play well, okay, it's time to get into the bow about about.

Okay, So the bad segment is always brought to you by salt Eggs.

So are you like a I know you're like a skincare girl, because you know what's crazy, Dre.

Remember the Kalise skincare stuff I got there yea, and I ordered it to and I love it.

Yes, plie, I think what is it called beauty?

What it is out?

But yeah, shout out to Kalise and her brand.

We don't want to act.

I'm not going to blow it up.

You can go look for page Okay, ready to reap.

Yeah, it's so good.

Anything from her line is so good.

She lives in Africa.

She makes all that herself, so like it's so like immaculate.

Yes, so I know you were skin care girling.

So we have well it's not skincare, but it's like women's willness, women will.

So we're gonna send you home with sometshole.

It's like imaginal wash.

And I always say it makes your coat you feel like it just took a mint.

Yeah, and it's all natural, it's all natural ingredient.

I love it.

It smells so good.

And then she has different ones, so like she has one, she has like one for like sensitive vagina, she has a regular one, and then she has this one that kind of has like the sea.

And you know what you would like to She has a rejuvenation of the oil is so good.

It's like what is it called black women own?

Yes?

Okay, you want me to know it?

Yes, Okay.

We gonna talk about why do men chase women if they can't fuck?

Why do y'all feel like men are always trying to go after women and deal with women that they know that they can't get.

I don't think they know that they can't get it, really.

I think certain niggas have a delusional mindset of like if I if I apply too much enough pressure, if I apply enough pressure, if I got enough money, Like niggas have a certain mindset of like nine that stually ain't impossible, like.

Or or go thinking like, oh, she fucked with that nigga, so corneous comparing other niggas, But like no, and I'm not gonna lie when I curve a guy and they're just so persistent and they feel like they want me so bad, especially when you really don't know me.

I know it's like full of lust and egos.

You don't even really won't me.

You just want to say you conquered me because it's something that's hurting you that I'm just not impressed by you, especially men with money.

Yes, exactly.

And that comes with time and experience though, because when you younger and they like applying so much pressure, it's like, oh, he owed me, Let me see what that's about.

I don't know.

Oh he wanted to spend it quick.

Hell yeah.

Like the mindset and it's like, ooh, girl, if you don't even understand what you're about to get yourself into.

The demon you attracting once you funk with the nigga likes so much shit that you got.

I learned over time, for sure, but it's like, ooh, we know, count me out.

It's too much.

It's deeper than the surface.

Yeah, promise you right, because are a real thing.

Oh my gosh.

Yes, you have to be very careful because that energy be transferred.

Energy demons all types of shit that they find you putting it right to yourself.

I make my mom pray over me with holy oil, all types of shit.

I'm about to go to the church and ask them to deliver me, like I asked my mom to do it.

But it's not like a baptism, but it's like delivering me from any demons that like you know, niggas that I fucked with it, Like it's a real thing.

You have to pray that office a specific prayers, a specific.

Way to do it.

I'm gonna go to the church and do that because like I want to be solely, purely, like the way I'm supposed to be in my walk of God.

Yeah for sure.

Yeah beautiful, because it's always too It's like and then nine times out of ten, when this man is putting pressure on you because he won't you so bad that he gets you, everything changes after that they get comforted like, oh I already got her, So chase.

But that's what I was gonna say.

Do y'all feel like the chase is like driven by real desire or the need for control, like me and wanting to control the narrative in the situation.

I think they start off with desiring and like admiring and being intrigued and wanting to see what that's about.

And then once they see what that's about, if it ain't on shit, and it's like okay bye.

Yeah, if it is, it's like, okay, I'm.

Like, can manipulate this little bit fuck around and keep doing this dumb shit with me?

Come on my mind.

That's how it be.

So it's like that's just how niggas is is like for real, and it's not a lot of real men.

I don't even want to say real niggas.

It's not a lot of real men at all.

So it's like if it's if no one, you know, keep them in your corner close, tell them to work, and.

Then what you were saying kind of piggybacking off of what you said.

It's even scarier now because a man won't even like you, but it'll be like he know that you used to fuck with somebody.

He know you used to fuck with this nigga.

He be like, yeah, I just want to I just wanted just to get back at him, or if this was his woman, I wanted to be mine.

It has nothing to do with you and everything to do with another man.

Sure, you got to ask the right questions and peep the scene a little hard.

You gotta see that real quick, because it's like they'll show you real quick if you if you study a nigga.

Yeah, they're gonna show your eyes exactly what for sure?

For sure, you just gotta be careful because all the tension ain't good assension.

And I think sometimes women you just be like, oh my god, he really want to talk to me, not even knowing what he's a real motives, just excited.

He said, it's a nigga that you probably already got a little Christi or something on.

So, yeah, I started a nigga group chats.

I ain't never seen him before.

I heard about him and how they just be ripping girls apart and just talking ship and ship like that.

Like this is so like I don't want to even be a part of being in this circus of like, oh that you know, they're all.

Ship, can't have too much and we know me got some more than with me.

It's like, you know, they talking.

Sadly, pillow talker, Jesus Christ, the worst ones for real.

All Right, we're ready to get into the bop.

Now you're ready by something.

Now it's time to get into a bow bow Bow bow bow.

So the bop of the week is and I'm excited to hear yours because it's like whatever music you've been jamming this week, oh new.

It don't have to be anything like extremely new.

It could be some old school whatever.

You've been jamming this week now, yeah, you can.

Pull something up.

I'm gonna go first.

My bop of the week is actually gonna surprise everybody because usually I'm like an R and B girly.

I'm very like INDI.

But I'm gonna go mainstream this week because I have been jamming this song twenty one Savage Drop the project, him and Drake have a song together, mister Recoop.

It is a bop because yes hard wow, okay, mister Recoop, mister.

Album.

Yes it's so hard.

And like I said, I'm not really like a rap girly.

I don't listen to a lot of rap music.

But there is this one bar that twenty one said.

He said, I converse with CEOs, you talk on a pillow because period.

Yeah, because that's what you need to do, you know what I'm saying.

So I was like, let me say that, let need that for a caption.

I like it.

Yeah, so shout out to Drake in twenty one.

It's a bop for me.

Yeah, you want to go, you can go and hate it.

And I got it.

I got another wing.

Okay wait, I was thinking, I want to match your energy with which you just did with the new ship that just came out, and like it just the bars when I tell you, they hit home so hard.

After the Streamer Awards.

After the Streamer Awards, this ship turned my confidence all the way up because of what he just said, like speaking on me for streams like I thought, you know, it was just some ship in there.

So shout out to a little baby, but little baby album that just came out.

It's called Other Boy, Other Boy.

Na, this is not about that one boy.

I'm talking about that other boy, not other Boy, and not the other boy, not other Boy too.

To this ship turned me up a whole nother not after the Streamer.

I like it real good.

I love it because my about the other week was Missus string Sitter.

That's one of his songs.

I loved it that period right here, you know everything.

Okay, So because we had the same bop, I was like, I got to think of another one.

So you and shite actually put me on this song recently, tender.

It is.

I think I think it's in my playlist.

Let me say it's so good.

Girl.

It's such a hype song, Like I feel like it's one of the songs that just gets you turn.

About to go out too hard, you know.

It's really a.

Real bop bop though, And it's not on Apple Music right now, but it's on YouTube and SoundCloud.

It's a new rapper.

His name is Baby Chief do it him.

He got a new song out.

It's on Let me see what it's called.

Oh, it's the beat.

Everything is so nostalgic, like I love it.

It's like some ship that you put on and put you in a good mood and like you could dance to it.

Bad guys called.

Put that in.

Yes, we love the little tune to turn up to everybody, not least Yes, y'all gonna love that.

Okay, okay, per Now do you give a good advice?

I feel like I did.

Okay, So the Poor Heart is a little audio, So go ahead and play.

It for I'm twenty one.

I'm talking to this twenty six year old.

We've been together since I was seventeen, and he went to jail, but we was on a real bad patch before he went to jail.

Now he's gonna be in jail for a year now.

And I love him so much, but I don't know what to do.

I don't know what to do if I should stay or I for just stick through him through the time.

But he was he was good, but he wasn't like we had her ups and downs on and off before he left.

And I don't know what to do.

I don't know if I should stay or I should just go live my young life.

But I love him, and I don't know.

I want to.

I be willing to leave him, but I don't know what's okay.

Well, I feel like it should be easier to leave him, and girl, yeah.

What are we doing here?

One, you're way too young.

Any woman at any age should not be dating.

To jail joburry, Yes, But then what was disturbing for me the she said she was seventeen when she started dating.

Him, right, and when she said he twenty six?

Yeah, twenty one?

Yeah?

Yayes Well, there's so many woes and and it's not like she's whispering.

Are you.

Is everything okay?

Esus?

Right?

If you need he?

Yes, I think that's that's a no brainer.

I think I want to tell her too, it's okay to love somebody and not beat them.

Yeah, kaya loves nobody.

And really, you if you really love somebody, you pray for him, you wish for the best.

You know, all you could do is pray.

You can't make nobody do anything.

You can't make him do anything, So you just pray from and you know, I'm a holler at you when you get out here.

You know, if you want to sugarcoat it sugarcoated, but you know, make him understand that you're still gonna love him, and you know, and it shouldn't be a selfish thing.

It should just be that's the right thing to do, right you young straight up?

Yeah, you are a girl.

You gotta live your life like you know how much life to live.

I would not be putting my life on hold for now twenty six year old who is in jail or about to go to that I can't remember what she said.

He in jailed, say he got out and he going for a year, he about to go about to go.

I would not be putting my life on hold for a year for somebody that he's going to prison.

It obviously keeps making bad seasons.

He going back again.

Yeah, and once you tie yourself to somebody that's doing bad shit, it's gonna come on.

Yeah, that's definitely coming back.

Yeah, you're gonna get involved with something.

If you're okay with that and you know, you just know what's coming, Like you're gonna keep even if he's in jail, like just that energy and you have him feeling like he's gonna have to regulate what you got going on the outside world.

It's gonna be bad to brace yourself for that if you do decide to around like.

It's not gonna be pretty for you to.

But we advise you not speaking.

Yeah, you all three of us right now now you're singing.

You know it's for the karaokee song.

You know what's song you want to say?

I will look at my karaoke playlist.

Yeah, you want to carry off you blackly, I got a couple to carry out my child.

Shout out to my love bugs and my Twitch community because they know my playlist is just it's too.

I got a couple of them karaoke.

It's a long list.

It's a bunch of them already know I love this.

It's so many love anybody that love karaoke as much as we do.

Yes, we should kaoke, We should.

That would be fun.

That would be perfect for us because that's all we do.

That's all we do.

I love that mm hmm.

And I feel like I'm a human juke box too, like every damn song created.

Let's go, we got love.

I thought you had my back by he should go and I by Sierra and it's good.

Okay, it's a rap Mariah Carey, time machine, neun me long, I forgot I wish I had a.

Song.

We got last time trade songs.

We got.

Mine again, Mariah Carey, Home is where you Belong, Bobby Volentino.

We got unfaithful, Rihanna.

Unfaithful is a good one.

We have never done un faithful because I'm like so many before.

Yeah, it's a good song for Look, okay, you already I got the lyrics.

I'll be pulled.

I pulled them up.

I'm without him all right.

I haven't heard this song again so long.

I don't feel like I know.

It's like such a karaoke so no, we're gonna do an a cappella.

Okay, we're like after it all your mothers.

Me me, Me'll read him chords ready, story of my life searching for the right buddy keeps avoiding me.

Sorrowing myself.

Cousin seems that Wrong really loves.

My comp beneath.

He's more than a man, and this is more in love.

The reason that the sky is blue and the clouds are rolling in because I'm going again, and you.

Know, I'm how this can be true.

And I know that he knows the mon things falling in kids him inside.

Some know that I am happy with some the guys I can see him dying.

I don't want to do this anymore.

I don't want to be the reason why every time I walk i'm a dog.

I see him by a little morning inside.

I don't want to hurt of anyone.

I don't want to take away here.

I don't wanna be that was really good.

I love you.

Yeah, let me tell you something.

I wish it could have been a longer.

I always couldn't.

But you know what, we're coming back to La, So we're gonna go apart two, but we're gonna stream with you when need to do a.

Stream for sure, I'm gonna do an actual agenda for us, this segment for us.

I like when we talk though like this, I want we definitely have to because when we come back to we're gonna hit you.

Girl.

We're gonna talk.

We don't talk like a little part too, yes, part two coming real, so go to it.

I always just want to give your flowers.

Thank you so much for being the inspiration with the girls, thank you for pulling.

Up on us.

And I'm not gonna I don't ever expect anything, but yeah, I would you take that?

Would you like ian you?

We like you?

I like you.

And when I got to Atlanta to im gonna oh yeah for sure, Yes I'm coming.

Rest okay, all right, and we'll see y'all next week.

Back to.

Back.

H