So I think it's circumstantial.

So I think if it's the first time y'all had sex and he didn't make unfortunately though it is a body, it is a body.

But like if like I'm having sex with my man and he before me, they didn't count, get me some more.

You see what I'm saying.

So like if he said, oh, man, we just had sex this morning, no we did not.

I didn't finish.

But if it's like the first time, you can't say, oh, me and him never had sex?

Why No?

I mean you were there and see it?

Were you there?

You can so unless it was a time where I had a third party witness, maybe I don't care what y'all said.

There's no proof.

What's up?

Y'all's your girl?

Lex p Andy, Sugar and cold and you are to an end to another episode of poor Mind where mind speaks overthought.

We gotta guess today.

We gotta guess today.

So het you having to do intros episodes where with our friends because I'm like, is kinky?

We could just have a ball to be professional?

Yes, because I got there intro.

You know they love the intro.

Let me get my and they don't know me.

They know y'all.

Hello, I need some help girls.

Shut up girl, because.

Let me do it what I do here you Okay, So let me say this.

First of all, this is our girl.

Y'all know we talk about her so much on the show, and this is one of I really will say this when it comes to black women in this space of podcasting.

I can truly say she is a pineer and o G of the podcasting space.

When I say, when I first met you, it was so inspirational to me.

I learned so much from you, you know what I'm saying.

So we gonna give her her flowers and give her her respect, Miss entrepreneur, a producer, director, writer, a podcast queen, the certified not for herself, Miss sets Up.

That was so beautiful, you know what.

I'm ready to come out wrappers.

And you did have a track you did did.

Drip and you drip need to put the link in the added to your story.

Yes, So let me just say I think we can all speak for this, like when we say, like, come into work, especially when you have like guests and you got to be professional.

You have to and you know you gotta turn it on.

So one thing that I love I love when we have these episodes of people who are friends in real life.

It's like we've been to have a ball.

Yeah, this is what poor minds is about.

It's less pressure, you not to worry about pulling teeth with conversations.

I love it too.

We don't have to worry about if we don't have good chemistry or missues.

You already know the vibe.

Yeah, the VIBESU.

So Kiki, just for you know, the younger because we have a young crowd now the girls tuning in, So for the younger people, can you just tell us you know about cocktails?

Gives us a little history, you know about who you are and with Kiki said something, yeah, so cocktails.

Jerry Discussions is a podcast that I started almost ten years ago, and it was it started off as just one a way for me to create an opportunity for myself.

I went to school, I had plans to be like on radio and television, hosting and doing things like that, and I wasn't getting the opportunities I wanted.

So I started to show and what better to talk about than my jacked up love life?

Right?

And it was just like I was going on bad days.

I was in very crazy situations and a lot of times I was just in it for the plot, but you can't really say that in the moment anyway, fys forward.

I come up with the idea to start a podcast after listening to the Ready, and I just kept going and kept going.

I went through a few lineup changes, and now I have a co host who has been with me since twenty seventeen, and we just talk about our love lives, relationships, sex lives over drinks and it's just supposed to be funny and like I mean, sometimes we be crying and sometimes it's serious, but it's really just supposed to be look at the life that you live and the choices that you make and find a way to laugh at it.

I was talking to everyone earlier.

I was like, you know, when people write in for advice, because we do advice as well, it's kind of like are.

They hoping for real advice?

Like you need to seek better help?

Right, I'm cracking.

For my because we are like making a lot of this and this is for entertainment.

But sometimes now and again, I feel like people really do need help, and I have to remind myself that, like people are tuned in and especially like anyone who found us are stuck with us through the pandemic.

People don't be having friends in real life, you know, for whatever reason, and sometimes it's those online connections you have.

So when they seem like they might do something.

Crazy, I'll go ahead and give real advice, but usually like it's just if you want to hear a funny response.

And then I've been doing that since well launched in twenty sixteen, and so here we are in twenty twenty five and still going.

And then on June.

Seventeenth, I was trying to remember the day.

I have a new podcast called the Xoman Podcast that is launching.

I'm really excited about that one.

That one is different.

I am interviewing people.

And I'm it's not gonna be so serious to.

Where you won't be entertained, but it's definitely a more serious.

No, I'm just.

Kiera Walker because I mean business when I come in there, and we need to get to the root of how they're feeling and what's going on.

No more of the as a man you should, as a woman you should.

I just want the black man to feel safe and open up.

I got them crying and everything.

Oh I love it and I can't wait.

And some of them real fun, y'all just need I mean.

Just want Fine, I'm so vulnerable, I got you, go ahead, go ahead.

So do you ever consider yourself now like an OG podcaster?

Yeah, and sometimes I just consider myself.

Oh yes, yes, the way those needs be cracking and stuff.

But yes, I do feel like I'm an OG podcaster.

I am so old with the podcasting.

It's like before all of these platforms popped up, before everybody was rushing to do video and setting it up because we started off with just audio and the industry has changed a lot.

But I love what I do as far as hosting, I love producing.

I want to do more of that.

I am really passionate about creating content and finding different ways to tell stories.

I love it.

But yeah, I'm and I don't plan to go anywhere.

Yeah, and I think I know you have like a breath of fresh air because I know doing your show, like you said, you get to interview, so it's not I don't got to talk about me my business.

That's probably my favorite.

Oh my god, don't get it too, pour minds is my shit.

Yeah.

When I get to be on Love Lexpeen, I get to talk about y'all.

It's different.

I don't got to talk about me and what I got going on, so I know you just have like a breath of fresh air with that.

It is nice.

So kind of piggybacking off of what Drea said too, like how do you feel about the podcasting game when you first got into it versus now?

It was like being out in the wild wild West.

I was cowgirl walker if I will.

Okay, there wasn't a lot of direction.

There weren't a ton of people trying to teach you to show you.

It was just kind of winging it a lot of the ways.

And fortunately for me, I had that background in broadcasting already knew how to do all of it editing, I knew about a lot of stuff from the jump.

I needed to refine those skills.

Don't get me wrong, but I knew about it.

It was different.

I felt like it was less pressure.

Yeah, less pressure is probably the biggest thing.

You don't have people in the comments or leaving reviews telling you how to do what you do when they don't do it.

And sometimes it's like I know that people want to.

Be helpful or whatever they feel, maybe they just do feel like talking shit.

You know, I get it, but you don't know, and so like just shut up.

Sometimes that wasn't a thing.

And then like the pressure to look put.

Together out of bed.

You aren't gonna see me.

You're gonna see the same picture that I took a year ago, and that was just gonna be it.

It's just different.

And then I see a lot of like people regurgitating the same things over and over again and the same things and doing things for clickbait.

That's the part I don't like.

Yeah, yeah, like days and I agree with one hundred percent, because at one point we were like that too, Like we always pretty much had the visual element, but at one point we just didn't give it them, Like.

We just used to roll out of bed yeah and record.

I mean we did.

I know, They're like, we know la, we know well, I will.

Say, but even with me, like I definitely I feel like I never just rolled out of bed to record, but I definitely put way more effort in now.

Like I used to be repeating you, I was gonna wear the same.

I didn't give it them.

Who cares because we're sitting in my apartment record and we just give me all the content.

Now I feel like, you know, we have to pull up, we have to be polished, we have to have a cute outfit on.

Hair gotta be done, makeup gotta be tea, everything has to be together because all of those elements matter when it comes to somebody clicking on the video, which is something we're back in the day, Like you said that shit did not matter if the content was good and it was funny word of mouth.

People hear about the podcast, they're gonna watch it.

Now all of these other things are affected that you know, there needs to be a factor.

Bick.

Yeah, it looks really good on you and your hair, the style.

I'm loving it down, thank you.

But I say that to say because I just made a video on TikTok and it got it kind of got a little traction because I was saying, let's bring brack favorite outfits, let's bring that repeating outfits.

If I buy something, I want to be able to wear it, you know, three four times a month sometimes let me repeat myself.

But no, I said that, and it was so many people in the comments like we never stopped.

Why do you care?

Why do you care?

And I have to explain people because I'm not known in the TikTok world.

I said, hey, I have a platform, not on TikTok, but on YouTube.

If I wear something too much, they're gonna be like, let's you got that on again?

Lex?

What you got on?

And I feel like, do y'all feel that pressure?

Like cause I know me and you.

Sometimes I will call Dre and I'll be like, Dre, did I wear this already?

Like?

Did I have that on already?

So?

How do you feel about repeating outfits?

Oh?

I'm gonna do it each and every time.

I don't give a good content.

Yes on cocky wearing my favorite outfits now not multiple times a month because the week.

But yeah, but I am gonna repeat my eye bought them, and I'm I'm gonna wear it until these fashion novaseems.

But okay, I'm about three times in fashion.

Yeah, but that's that's a good thing about fast fashion, is like when you do want to not wear the same thing, sometimes I will try to mix it up.

Or change my hair up.

But I've been supposed to take these braids out.

Yeah, okay, so we're just gonna see it.

And I'm pretty sure I wore this on cocktails already, so hello again.

But I do try a little bit.

But if I'm repeating something, I'm repeating it usually the more casual fish.

Yeah, that's my little away.

I'm gonna repeat the outfit.

I don't give it in.

Yeah, well, you don't repeat outfits.

I do very the real life.

Yes, I do because I feel like, because I feel like on a normal basis, I wear the same ship.

Y'all are both of my friends.

Y'all know.

If y'all hit me up and y'all like, oh, let's go to lunch, nine times out of ten, I'm gonna.

Have on some ath leisure.

Yeah, yeah, I wear the same clothes.

Now, well, if we talk about you stepping out, that's this.

I'm on my same little dress.

Bitch, you had that on last week?

Shut up girl.

Yeah.

I was mad this weekend because when I was packing, I went to Dallas and I really wanted to wear my favorite dress and it's not from fashion off so I could get I can get more wears that up.

I was like, God, damn, every time I go somewhere I want to put on the same outfit, I've got to be stopped.

Cause it's like good in it?

Why not flattering, and I feel like now that I've started investing in like cause I still love fast fashion, don't get me wrong, but like, I definitely have started investing in my wardrobe more over the past.

I would say two three years.

So certain outfits like yep, this cost me a couple hundred dollars, you're gonna see it again.

Okay, let me say I'm spread or I'm a silly messed up so bad.

So when I recorded the last episode of Cocktails, when I did that with y'all, I was like, Okay, this is way before travel Queen.

I'm safe.

I'm but but then like y'all waited a couple of weeks to drop it, so I had on that same blue dress.

They dropping Travel Queens clips with my orange hair, Cocktails dropping clips with my black cat.

I got that same fuck ass blue dress on.

I remember the dress.

That's what I'm saying.

And you know it's funny.

I almost bought that dress and I was gonna wear it that day.

Got the same day, Yes, but I'm glad my order didn't come in.

I got it in orange too.

I wore it on uh we just did a bank show.

I wore it on bank show when I did it, so y'all gonna see you again.

I'm tired.

I am tired when I tell you I spend so much money just buying something because I'm like, I don't want to repeat this.

I don't want to repeat this.

So I feel like, honestly, I'm about to start going back to the episodes from like twenty twenty three, what I had on, bitch, it's about time I run that dress I had on with Crystal Renee.

It's been about two years.

Yeahs like the girls say we need to be doing that anyway because we're flogging up the oceans or something.

No, we're doing something wrong because these these clothes don't degrade.

It's just messed us up there in the.

Little seal got on my little booty short.

It's just taking up spade what I don't know, you saving my clothes?

SINGERL want to say the singer she said, a little steal, oh on my booty shots not mas seal with some booty.

I used to love me some time, keeople.

That was my mama songs.

And what was I singing about?

Because I had to be in like kindergarten or something.

I was little like y'all all steel, right, So she said, what the fucking still, Oh my gosh, Okay, let me tell y'all.

Something real quick.

Then we're gonna move on to the first topic.

Okay, I went to the park the other day, right, like, we had a little family day at the park, and I'm watching these men hoop.

You know, men love to go to the parking they do.

They love to be like, yeah, you know, hoop.

I could have went to the lead, but she told my achilles and she didn't have it work out for me.

Find you.

These are the same niggas that want to be online talking about angel Rees and how she can't.

Let me tell y'all I saw y'all at the park, y'all cannot hope you fucking stink.

And it would be the same people that get online and really feel like if they did a one on one where angel reaes, they would beat her.

I mean they throwing up brick after a brick after brick.

I said, I'm teaching the laxy shoes up to show your eyes done.

It was so goddamn bad.

I mean, I just think the audacity sometimes and I don't want to make this a man versus woman.

Think but I think it's so crazy that some men really think that y'all could take a one on one with Angel Reese and win after what I saw.

Yeah, you know what I'm saying.

I'm talking about y'all niggas that be playing at the Wreck and at the park.

It wasn't given the Yeah boys and Girls club.

You know what I'm saying.

You know I was not in press, but y'all like, get the eg if y'all seen your boot play at the park and he couldn't.

Hop yes, cause why am I even here?

Ah?

Why am I watching you play basketball?

And you can't do her?

And you can't even play there's no snacks.

You're supposed to take me to a basketball game?

You know what I'm saying, there's a snowball truck or yuess what I say?

I love me an athletic man.

I'm not saying you gotta be you know Lebron James.

But if you're going out there, who don't embarrass me?

Go have boy time, Go have your guys time.

This is a guy's night out.

Or why is you missing a lay up?

Yeah?

I will say, if you're not good, don't invite me.

Don't invite me.

Don't invite me because as soon as we get into it, i'mna be like, yeah, And that's why y'all ass suck at basketball.

You wasn't getting no motherfucking shots.

You was right there.

You couldn't even get the layers.

Was looking like shap we get into it, I'm gonna remind you follow the yellow brick road, Dorothy, get him out of here.

You know what I'm saying.

It's vicious and mean.

I see I probably would have just got distracted and left because it was gonna be boring.

But that's all I'm saying.

When but when he got and we get home, See, I turned it to bring it on.

Yeah, I could be a gr Yes, it's a leader.

Back in the day, I could do that.

You was a cheerleader.

You know what's a good time.

I love a good observation.

So yeah, man, y'all need to kind of hush on the internet when it comes to the woman athletes, the female athletes and things like that.

But y'all not You cannot get on a tennis court with Serena.

It's not happening.

Just hush period when he comes to we mean, that's what y'all need to do shut up.

Yep, Yeah, that's what we're gonna tell him.

Shut up, girl, because you sounded like a girl.

You talking about the girls, and you sounded like one too.

Yah, mind you be mind Yeah a business.

Okay, So y'all already get into the first job.

Yes, so we didn't even started.

Look, we already deep in this thing.

Y'all know, we get the chatty go ahead, Drea.

All right, So for the first topic, I really want us to talk about.

You know, do you feel like your parents taught you how to date?

Because I feel like talking about dating in the black community, which your parents was just so taboo.

They used to make jokes.

Well, I know my daddy, he used to make jokes when I was like ten, like, oh, you're not gonna date until you twenty one, You're not gonna date till you twenty five, you never gonna have a boyfriend, Like it was always just such a taboo thing to talk about, especially six two.

Like, I feel like a lot of our parents didn't prepare us for having sex and getting out into the world and dealing with me.

And so do y'all feel like y'all parents prepare y'all for that?

Or was it even something that y'all talked about in y'all households.

Absolutely not.

They did not prepare me for nothing.

So my mama got pregnant with me when she was in college.

So a lot of my conversations with her about dating, sex, relationships and all that was just don't get pregnant, right.

But she was always reading.

Them freak nasty books in her book club, so I would read some of them too, saying she even like the historical romance Beverly Jenkins.

Yes, so I was reading all that I wanted, the slavery sex and the presentation it was going down.

I'm trying to see how they used to do, get creative, you know.

And then when I got okay, if your man.

Said pale loon is what he's giving, it was funky in there, that slavery.

Dick watching science.

I was watching Centers again last night because you can rent it at home to watch, and that scene where old girl had watched and she was about to get her cootie cat.

I said, I know it's funky, and they're talking about you.

He wanted to taste, He just wanted to take.

You're gonna get more than that, and you gonna be tasting, an't he's gonna stain his nose, He's uplip and everything else a cent to remember.

But yeah, so anyway I'm getting away from things.

It's a cent to remember.

But I was reading this stuff and I was learning about sex from there.

My dad, I think he still looks at me as a child, my actual dad.

I can't go to him for advice about anything, and I wouldn't because I think that he doesn't make good choices, is very much like the young guys, and he's not young.

And then my grandfather he would try to instill in me to find a man of God and all that, but I wasn't trying to hear that back then when I was younger, and it just sounded too grown, too mature, and nobody was really having real conversations, just how to flirt or how to realize somebody likes you like before it gets too serious.

Even the introductory things are there were certain expectations that I had either been taught from movies or TV or just social things, and I'm forming my expectations from all these different things, but nobody is telling me how to really interact it.

Certain things like money conversations, the ability do they have kids or not?

You in high school, you in college, you don't want somebody, you know, little things like that, But nobody is talking about how to handle things together.

Yeah, and fast forward to now.

My mom is divorced, but I think her and my stepdaddy go together.

So I don't know what's going on there.

And I'm like, yeah, I do be doing a lot of things that I see you do, like just weird stuff and I didn't learn.

And you know what, also, I think is weird too with our generator, like we always thought like this is a scene on Bad Boys, if y'all remember, like when the boy comes and picks up the girl for prom and the dad is like at the door with a gun.

You know what I'm saying, Like, I just think that that's corny and it is cause to me, it's like, yes, you want to protect your daughter, but this is a moment to say, you know what, let me pull them to the side and have a real conversation.

And you know what I'm saying, like, let me can speak well, you know, see see the things that are important rather than be like, oh, I'm gonna scare you, and it like but I know, we it's supposed to be a joke, but people start taking that stuff literal because on social media that was going viral a few years ago with like men in the background would a gun and their daughter in front of them with like their prom dress on, Like that is wild.

That's not the proper thing to do to Like, we're not having conversations.

We're just like, oh, be afraid of my daughter.

Then on the other end, we're teaching the young boys like, oh, yeah, you pull a woman, you're supposed to be fucking.

You supposed to be it's okay to be fucking.

Like, no, it's not okay.

Like we never have healthy conversations about sex and.

Things right, which is so crazy to be because you know, you have that on one end, But then with the little girls, if you wear short shorts or if you're wearing like a two piece swimsuit, people are over sexualizing you.

If you're a little carbag, she's are your hervey year than you should be for your age.

And now you fast.

Yeah, we get the stigma of being fast.

But then they're out here telling the young boys to go fuck to go.

So it's like what it doesn't make sense at all or.

That, Like, Okay, boys are supposed to get experienced and you're supposed to do this.

Why the girls are supposed to maintain their virtue.

So who y'all supposed to be?

I would like to know.

It's a complete unbalanced.

But I think that unbalanced shows in our generation with our dating now, Like it's so apparent that we do not know how to date anymore because our parents.

I'm not gonna lie, Like when it comes to my mom, like my mom was married.

My dad passed away when I was very young, So growing up, my mom was just always like, you don't need a man, be independent, do this on your own.

But if you do have a man, make sure he sets you up, which nothing is wrong with that, but basically our independence was so forefront.

It was just like my mom didn't have no tolerance for bullshit, which is not a bad thing, but I do believe I wish that my mom would have dated more and been more out there and given herself and you know what I'm saying, and had that experience of finding love again, but she was so closed off to it because she's like, no, no, this is this is it.

You know.

I had my husband that was me, and I'm just like, so I never really saw my mom really truly being in love, you know what I mean.

So I think with that, I don't want to say, don't teach women how to be independent, but I think as much as we need to, hey, nobody's coming to save you, but also we need to teach about partnership, be open to love.

We don't teach that in the black community at all.

You know.

I was talking to my mom about that because I have a brother who's twenty three, and just looking at how I'm the oldest, looking at how I was brought up as a girl versus him, I would think it would be flip flopped.

All of the talk about being in dependent, being on your stuff.

It's like being the oldest daughter.

That's pressure because you have to do everything first.

Your parents are figuring it out first.

And I'm not mad at them.

They're not gentle parents, but it's a gentler form of parenting.

They're giving him more room to figure out what he wants to do.

And he still ain't got to figure it out, but we're just gonna keep him on the prayer list.

It's just so much software.

But I was like when I was twenty three.

I was living here in Atlanta trying to figure it out.

I had already gone to college.

I did everything the right way and thinking that that was right.

And I guess they learned that you don't always need to do it that way.

It's just like it's very different.

I also think that.

Instead of teaching the women to be so independent, we just need more balance, like you said, and something I had asked a lot of the men on XO Man.

I asked them, the ones with children, and I asked them about what they're teaching their sons about love and relationships and dating and all.

Of that, and what were you taught.

A lot of them weren't taught at all, like what we're saying.

They're like our age and older.

And then some of them are teaching their kids certain things, and then others don't have them yet, so they're trying.

To figure it out.

But yeah, it's like y'all got to talk to them about that.

Some of them are still avoidant and yeah.

I asked my brother, like, where are you getting your advice from?

Because you're making bad decisions and he was like, well, I don't know.

It's a bunch of I don't know why everybody don't know, and yeah, please call me more.

But that was such a good example that you said, because they're teaching us to be independent and provide for ourselves and do that, but they don't teach the little boys that it's always all give him grace, girl trying to He's gonna figure it out.

You can figure it out.

Make sure no girl is using you.

But then you're telling me y'all yet, ma'am, And I'm like you, ma'am.

Or the problem.

I think it's the internet too, though, because I think even if you want to be somebody that wants to really fall in love and you want to be a liver boy or a liver girl, you have all of these podcasts and all of this information on the Internet that's making you be like, Okay, well, like I don't know because I don't want to give played.

Maybe y'all need to protect myself.

Maybe I do need to be a player.

Maybe I do need today multiple women instead of just settling down with one person.

Cause I am young, so I feel like a lot of the time it's all of these propaganda that's being put out as well that's affecting the youth.

And I feel like we didn't have this.

I'm dull, I was dumb, dumb, But I also I won't worry about out they playing me.

Yeah, I don't.

I was just saying we was all playing.

I do agree because I think that sometimes, like I'm gonna just use y'all for example, like I'm a consumer and I'm listening to a Dre or I'm listening to a Kiki.

I need to listen to what y'all are saying from y'all's experience, but I also need to understand that my life is my experience.

Yeah, so I can't say what Dre is saying.

Hey, you know what I'm gonna be outside he played me.

But maybe I do have a good man.

I do have this situation that it could work out for me, you know what I'm saying.

So I think a lot of times when we see people on social media, take what I always say, lex people went through that.

You ain't got to go through that, but also take my experiences lightly though you your situation could be completely different.

Because at the end of the day, I always say I do want to be married, I do want to have kids, Like that's what I want for myself.

So I think you do need to look at your goals and what you want in life and not only surround yourself with people with the same likeness, but also do things that are conducive to getting there.

If you really want to be somebody's husband and you really want to be somebody's wife, I don't think you need to be watching red pill content or content of people being like leave, don't do this.

That's not conducive to what you're trying to get at.

You know what I'm saying.

But how do you escape it?

Because you open up a book, you get off.

They all read something else I've discovered, or do simple masks?

Simple mask you know what I'm saying, tune into It's okay, you know what I'm saying.

They don't know phonics, so they can't sound it out if it wasn't on they site word flash cars, y'all.

We are doomed.

We're gonna be working forever, you know what I'm saying.

Yeah, So I think sometimes you do have to I enjoy a lot of people's content, but I enjoy the content and I log off.

And I also think that people need to remember, no matter how a show presents itself, everybody's here for entertainment.

This is not PBS.

Okay, this is not you can it's infotainment.

So when anybody speaks from their dating experience, nobody is giving you a full documentary of their lives.

You're only gonna get bits and pieces.

So remember the things that we can laugh about now we're talking about them, and we can make a joke or whatever.

But you you gotta stop taking everybody's things that you see on the internet, especially when you don't even watch the whole show as like fact or like this is how it always is.

Sometimes people are just playing.

If you read one books, you start catching on to jokes.

Go ahead, No, I was just gonna say, And I think it's just very interesting because when you look at other cultures, they teach their daughters how today who today, like where to find the men, and what you should be looking for in a partner, what you should be looking for in the man.

We're just not taught those things.

Yeah, we don't talk about it because and it's okay for them to look to me in as a form of financial security, right like, whereas with us we're looked at as gold digger's because we want to be and it's financially stable, and then they raise their their boys to be providers, Like, this is what you're supposed to do.

You're supposed to be a leader, You're supposed to take care of the household.

And I'm not a person who really believes in gender norms like that necessarily, but I do believe in partnership.

So whatever works for their culture, they're teaching partnership, and that's something I do believe in, Like, cause.

Honestly, I'm not gonna lie.

As I've gotten older, I'm like, Okay, I don't want to be a woman.

I don't want to be a stay at home mom.

I want to be a boss.

I want to be a provider as well for my household.

Like there are certain goals I'm reaching on my own.

But imagine if I had somebody who was equally yoked.

Imagine the shit that we could do together, you know what I'm saying.

So I say because I think so, Like this is an extreme example, but like, look at jay Z and Beyonce.

Do you think they're talking about fifty fifty.

No, they're not, because it's beyond that.

And I think a lot of times we have to think beyond that, but we're sitting here talking about it.

If you're gonna send a man a drink or not, or who paying a rent?

What are we talking about?

Why do you think that we seem to do that?

Do you think it's like fear based and it's like you teach your daughter to be independent and not to look to anybody, but if you are gonna have somebody, they need to come with this because you don't want them to be taking care of somebody else, because maybe you've seen.

Your friends or your mother do that for somebody.

Or do you feel like people get caught up and looking at numbers and like, okay, there's so many women and not enough men and having this fear that the black men don't want us anymore, or that there's just simply not enough, or you're gonna have to do something else.

Why do y'all think that that continues to be how it is?

Ya?

I know what it is.

For me.

It's just a sense of I'm not leaving here with nothing.

I might get played, but at least I'm leaving here with something.

I mean, with teaching your child something, What do you mean, like like like how we were talking about parents teaching their children.

How today, Why don't you think that we teach the women one way and the boys another and give us different Yeah, giving people different expectations.

But I do get leaving here with something.

Yeah, I want to leave here with something.

But also I just think America in general is rooted in misogyny.

So that's why I feel like for the generations and generations literally since the beginning of time, women were taught that like, oh, you have to present a certain way to get chosen.

But the problem is, back in the day, men used to work hard for women.

Men used to work.

Hard for women.

I've seen something the other day.

I think it was from Level.

We had him on the show recently.

He was doing a stand up comedy tour or whatever, and he was basically saying, like, back in the day used to.

Be very chivalries.

They need to work hard for the women, Like Okay, it's a puddle of water right here, let me throw my coat down, let me throw my trench coat down, so it's gonna walk over it.

Men have lost that these days.

Like I feel like, back in the day, women worthy prize.

Now men feel like they're supposed to be the prize too.

But again, I think America is just rooted in misogyny and it's just been passed on from generation to generation.

So I do agree with that because in the same breath, because you know, like men used to do all that, but now we're in a generation to where they have taught us so much to be independent.

If a man do try to throw his trench go down, I got my own trench coat hole ad because I'm a provider and I can do it for myself.

I'm saying, teachers, don't let that man put his trench coat down, because then he gonna feel like you owe him some pussy and this and that, so do it yourself.

They teach us to do it ourselves and don't.

But I'm saying that's where society is now, So that's where the conflict is from.

You know what I'm saying, Men feel like, well, I don't want to do that cause one a lot of you niggas can't afford a trench coquess another topic.

But if he can, we want to throw the trash at thrift store, you know what I'm saying.

But thrifting ain't mix me.

But I'm just saying I want like the women we were taught specifically, that's how my mom taught me.

Don't do it yourself.

Yeah, you know what I'm saying, like carry yourself and do it yourself.

But that's important to say to do it myself except for like work, and she was like, make sure you have your own.

She was always teaching me about an exit plan.

In her insight, I know why she did that, I know what was going on in her life.

But at the time she's like, you just never want to be so dependent that you find yourself stuck.

But she is very much she's she's like, that's man's work.

She don't want to take out no trash, she don't want to fix something.

She don't want to read instructions.

When she orders some on Amazon to put it together, she will literally wait for somebody to come do it.

It's just different.

One thing I think the men have done successfully and I wish we as women could do it.

They're able to switch things, these things up, like how you were talking about how they used to be so chivalous.

They are able to come together and yes, and they just they stick to it.

And we are not women.

We are not I'm cooking, I'm cleaning, well.

I'm not and I'm not, and then we want to fight with each other.

So be like, okay, girl, you can be on the cooking squad and I'll be on this squad, you know, cooking squad.

But yeah, I mean, and I feel like a lot of the time us as women, as a generation, as a whole, we be feeling to realize, like we the reason why the niggas is like that now the standards, the standards are not the same as they used to be because, like Keiki said, we can never stick on to one side.

So it's like some of us is over here tired to tell and we like, fuck y'all need because y'all ain't doing enough.

I'm not fucking with you.

I'm not giving you no pussy, I'm not going on no dates with y'all.

I'm not responding to no dms.

I'm not entertaining nothing, any of you.

Got the women over there that's still like, well shit, I need my coochie squad.

And then that's gonna be me.

So they're gonna leave and come over here, and it's just like, well, maybe somebody's gotta rupt this, you know, yea, or we're not.

It has to be that.

But It's like if I do that and you do that, we don't have to talk about each other.

Well, you just do it.

I'm gonna stay.

If we're holding it down over here, hold it down over there, what you're gonna do?

Yeah, I don't know what that is, but yeah, I've noticed, like even a couple of times, I've asked us, so, what do you think about guys who do this?

And David all of them.

Well, I think that's a little sassy to be gossiping about what another man is doing.

I don't like to speak on another man, but we those bitches be over there, and I will say that.

So, yeah, back to how we are raised, because you know, you grew up in a two parent household.

Parents were married, like your dad, you know, showed you like what a man is supposed to do.

I yeah, like I said, my dad passed away.

My mom didn't bring men around.

I knew one man that my mom dated my entire life.

When my mom passed away and we was at her memorial, man show up.

He said, yeah, you s to date your mom?

Is yeah, come from It was shocking to me.

So growing up it was very much giving.

Like I said, your experience is your dad teaching you know, a man is supposed to do that a man, but and it was no, do it yourself, pick up yourself and get yourself, you know what I'm saying.

So that's where a lot of the disagreement in our community comes from.

And I hear that from a lot of women, you know that I have conversations with that didn't grow up with a male prison in a household.

Sometimes I think that that's the difference, because, for example, with me, I don't never I have never really just felt pressured by men to do anything.

Yeah, because I'd be feeling like, if you make me feel pressured, I'm gonna walk away.

The fuck You're weird because certain things to me are just the bare minimum, like a man being nice to you, a man taking you on a date, a man courting you properly, a man treating you with respect.

That's the bare minimum.

That's what you're supposed to do.

Like my dad raised me with the standard to like, if a man can't do more for you than what you're doing for yourself, why are you dealing with him?

I did get that lesson.

Yeah, my dad.

Didn't really teach me anything, but my mom was married to my stepdad forever and they got back.

Well he didn't, that was just he gonna be mad.

He did because he don't look like professor we call him.

But I didn't really learn anything from data ferent men.

But my stepdad did teach me, and my grandfather that's who I started.

That's who I always think of, like my default dad, that as my grandfather, and he did teach me a lot of things about how a man is supposed to treat a woman just by being that example, not a ton of conversation about it, but truly leading by example and making sure that he was always thinking about his family and that he was a man of his word and things like that, and those are things that I would look for and they don't be doing that.

That's why I like being single.

And I think that's where that's been the hardest thing for me, Like I say, just kind of letting my guard down and letting the men be me, because I'd be like, you know, I'll just do it myself, get out my way, get out my way, and then I get the egg, I get turned off, and then you're gone.

So I like that.

I feel like, just go out just yeah, But I was just gonna say, like, based off of the three of but it's being friends.

I feel like you're the nicest one.

No, I'm extreme.

You're so nice, and I feel like you're you're very.

Soft and like womanly, Like I wouldn't look at you and be like, oh, like she be stiff on niggas.

No, it's not that I'm stiff on niggas, but I will say that's something that I learned like this, Like my last situation I've been in, if you told my ex what I do for the man i'm with them, He'll be like, you're lying.

No, she doesn't.

She's very much like, Okay, forget it, I'm gonna handle it, and I'm gonna do it.

This is something that I've just now learned, just learning how to step back and let a man be a man.

And my past situations it was very much like, oh, I'm not asking him for nothing, I'm not doing I'm a handle it because let me show him that I that I that is true.

I was very Now I'm a lot softer now in this situation because I'm just like, Okay, this is what I want to do with my life, and this is more conducive to what I want, you know what I'm saying.

But this is something that's still hard for me, very hard, because I'm just like, let me put my truch code.

Can I ask y'all this though?

Because I think that was a really good point that you made, Because now that you said that, I do.

When we were younger, you were that way.

Why do you feel like women are like that, Like they're so afraid to ask a man for certain things or ask a man for what they want or what they deem valuable in the relationship.

But men are straight up gonna ask us for what they want.

They gonna ask you for some place, They gonna ask you if they want you to cook.

They gonna ask you if they want you to go pick something up for them, whatever it is, you know what I mean.

They're going to ask you for what they want.

Why us as women are we so.

Afraid to let a man know what it is that we want if we're not happy in a relationship.

Is it fear of being lonely or the man walking away.

Or like, you know what, it's all for me, it's a fear of disappointment, and like either not getting what I want is one option, but the other, which is worse to me because I'd rather you just tell me know or whatever the response is gonna be if it's not gonna happen, I don't want you to tell me that you will and then you won't.

Then it's gonna send me down.

Mariah Carey Walslawt in shower experience.

Yes, where I'm just like, Okay, what are all the signs that I miss?

Now I gotta let him go.

I'm sad I wi't let him go, but I'm sad about this.

I'm wondering, like why did I waste my time all these things?

Questioning myself about what is it about me?

And I didn't like it.

I have become more comfortable in my older, wiser years to share what it is that I want and if it's not that like, okay, but you won't get what you want right?

Yeah?

And I too think that it's from societal pressures.

We get online and a girl will be like, oh if you can't get this out your nigga, you not that girl.

You're just not that girl.

And sometimes when you ask a man for something he doesn't give you what you want.

It's not that you're not that girl.

That's just not your person or he she no.

But let me say that it ain't even about in the person.

Some niggas just can't.

But what I'm saying is if a man doesn't want to do something for you, that that too.

But what I'm saying is that has no testament to who you are as a woman.

You know what I'm saying.

A lot of times a woman be like, Okay, well I asked him this and he didn't do it.

Maybe I'm not good enough, maybe I'm not pretty enough, and we blame it on ourselves.

So a lot of times women don't ask men for they want out of that fear of rejection because I will say, well, you're already giving him some plicy.

I mean, that's what I'm saying.

But that's why I say it's the fear of rejection because we don't because we all when you get on line, what they say, oh no, it's not in my love language.

If a man tells me no, if a nigga tell you know, he don't like you, and I am.

So tired about love languages.

Yeah, some of that stuff y'all be saying.

It's not there are fine a book with y'all need to read the book, y'all talk about all these random.

Things my love.

Yeah, and it's not just about what you get, it is how you show up.

But anyway, and people bring out different versions of their selves depending on who they're dating, Like one person could get a whole completely different version of you than another person depending on how y'all Bobby being as your person orn.

I just think it's childish though, when women try to put their selves against other women based off of like things.

I think that's where they made up love language has come because I feel like it makes some girls feel like superior, Yeah, because.

They be thinking, Oh, this man paid my rent.

Your man don't pay your rent.

Oh my gosh, I could never.

But maybe her man loves her, and that man paying your rent is like opinion a bucket to him.

I look at it like maybe he can't pay.

Like everybody is, everybody's.

Situation is not the same, right right, So sometimes like, yeah, one girl, her man might be paying her rent because he can afford to.

This girl's man may not be able to afford to do that.

That doesn't mean that he doesn't love her, it's just that he can't afford to do it.

And if it's your ren why you can't pay it?

That's what I would like to know since what's going on?

Because we need to talk.

About that at some point?

Who got nobody?

We gotta have some accountability.

What's going on?

What's talking about on?

Because it's like we can demand things from everybody else, right, and a tough lesson that I had to learn from myself.

Right, It's like, Okay, you want somebody to treat you a certain way, but do you even treat yourself that way?

And if you things that you do, how do you do that?

You say that you care about yourself with the way you eat, the way that you act your habits, you're not taking care of yourself, not doing a lot of the things that.

You want to do.

You don't have to spell that out for somebody.

They can see it, they can smell it.

They know what it is.

So it's like when you not really tuned in and doing what's best for you, other people notice that.

Why would you ever expect anybody to treat you treat you better than you treat you.

That's crazy, And so to your rent every now and again, you know things happen, totally understand So if you fall on hard times, But like the expectation is somebody that's a.

Bit entire, that a lot.

It is expecting that, like expecting that.

We've had conversations when we were younger, and it was people that I used to like work in the clubs with girls I used to be cool with when I was younger.

They used to have the expectation up on meeting someone on the first day, Oh, you need to pay my rent.

Like, I think it's different if you get in a relationship and that's what your man wants to do for you, if he wants to help alleviate some of your stress.

Sometimes when y'all have a real connection and y'all have a real, real or that's completely different.

But meeting somebody on the first date and having that be an expectation, it is just like where are many you.

Didn't meet him?

Was he gonna get paid?

I don't know.

That's a mess.

However, I work love her rent getting paid regardless because she's she's a hustler.

She got that bag, she got that check on it.

I mean, and me and my men are in love.

That's another thing too, Like I mean, it's you know what I mean, I think that that stuff matters, like if you're in a relationship.

And you see a future with this person or already just trying to get and if you're just gonna be trying to get things, stop doing it to men who are working.

Y'all need to go find those scammers.

A lot of them have already been deported.

Now.

Back in my day, when I was fresh and hot in these Atlanta streets, a lot of girls had those expectations because they was running them tax scams.

The Africans was running the tax skians.

I had me one and a few other people had some too, okay, you know, and so they are no longer in the country.

Obvious seeing them posting the uh in Kenya with.

Texting no, I said, they're posting the Zebras and giraffes because they done got sent back to Kenya's.

Well made.

Maybe said people are I.

Think also, like dealing with somebody who is scamming for money, they are stealing, dealing with them, it's a lot different from dealing with somebody who is earning their money.

No matter how they go about well, it does matter if they are truly earning their money and not stealing it in some shape form or fashion that's different, like they work for that, they earn that.

You just want to blow through it.

I think they had a really cleared house on all of them.

A few times I was.

Hoping they was gonna be able to get back get hitting them.

Ain't nothing.

They don't want to accept cars.

Nowhere in America do I go, except for Atlanta, where you walk into somewhere and they got signs up about no cash, app cards, no gift cards.

Know this, no that.

I'm like, y'all have dry some places because you know, the clubs don't want to take X I learned that one time back.

What was that club?

A love Aroma?

Our?

I p yes, our pizza Wings had a time up in there.

Okay, but anyway, yeah, the club's don't take it because it's very easy to dispute.

Y'all gotta stop scamming.

The scamming all right.

Top was drinking to day, Okay that Top.

Girls, and even the cocktail is a little bit tropical too.

So this one we're gonna call the XO man.

All right.

We have some repicidal tequila, we have some caparis, some lemon juice, and then we have some moan and stone fruit syrup.

And then we garnished it with a beautiful orchid, so everyone has like a different flower.

I think I tried to match the outfits a little bit better.

And so this is the XO Man in tribute to Kiki's new show that is dropping.

And I want to just take the time to personally thank you Key, because with our key, I wouldn't even be here.

I was just gonna say it.

Shout out to you.

H you she had I mean she.

I actually just learned it a month or so ago when we did the Travel Queen's premiere.

So I can't remember if it was you, Lex or Andrea, but we me and Ty have a friend Domino.

Yeah, shout out to Domino.

He's a chef.

He has some sauce sauce spas.

Anyway, we were talking one day and we ran into each other at homecoming talking, talking, talking, and at the time, we had a girl who was making drinks on our show, and he was like, if you ever need somebody else, I know a girl.

This is my homegirl Tie.

She's really really good.

So I was like, okay, Well, we were still using that other girl and we didn't know she was gonna quit, but we were still using that other girl, and then one we were talking it was it was you and I was like, oh, I know somebody, my friend dom No had actually told me I'll connect y'all, and so yeah, it was from that and I was like I was telling her.

I was like, you know, it's better that it worked out that way, because I love this setup for you.

It's it's it's been great watch.

I love hot Down.

Yes, the part of the Poor Minds crew.

I mean they were like, she right down the tie life story.

She's like, I'm just knocking over and a half years.

Yeah.

I think it was a December twenty Yes.

That is.

It was like because it was when we first moved to this studio.

Yeah, and it wasn't like, oh we tried you out.

Then the three months when I was like, okay, let's try somebody was like yeah.

And then crazy too because full circle moment, Keikey and Medina were the first guests that we had when we moved to this study.

It was it was yeah, but you know what, It's come a long way, still looks very cute, and I love recommending other people.

I don't like trying to keep everybody for me in my back pocket if I see an opportunity or even a better opportunity.

Sometimes, you know, when people recommend you for stuff, you just never know what could happen.

So anytime somebody's like, oh I know somebody can do this, I try my best to put them in the best place, even if I would rather use them and say I know something is better, it's going to be better for you.

I like to do that.

I think it's important.

Okay, let you right, you would not be a toie on four Minds if it was not for Kiki.

Only forgot about that, Okay, I got you right here.

It does, and it also pays to speak up about different things that you want to do because you never know who's listening, who's watching, and it's like, oh, I didn't know you wanted to do that.

I got you.

Did you ever think that you would kind of be in this kind of situation though, like doing bartending on TV or not TV?

You know, I wanted my own show, Okay, literally on my past vision boards like the podcast set up and all of this stuff.

I had a title on everything, but I just it takes so much commitment to have different topics all of that.

So that is where I just it didn't click for me.

So that's why I say everything aligns perfectly because for that opportunity to even come up a year after I did that vision board, it just shows that you just walking your purpose and everything's gonna.

Come to you as necessary.

So the.

Club house, all right, you are second topic.

We want to talk about content creator experiences.

Okay, because a lot of time, you know, before content creators were you know, well known or some content creators now are considered celebrities.

You know, we were regular people online.

We used to say crazy things, have crazy moments, have a breakdown, calling people names.

I used to love to get drunking it on the internet, used to love to talk about people on Twitter a popular moment.

And I don't mean to bring it up because I love you, girl, but I gotta use you for an example.

When Sizza had her big, big break was when she came out on Rihanna's album Anti.

She got a home on there.

People started digging up her old tweets and she was like dis and Rihanna and Sissa replied in response to that, was like, hey, do y'all realize During that time, I was jealous of her because I wanted to be her.

I felt like she had all the things that I wanted, and instead of just giving her her flowers, it came out and hate and she was like, so I'll take that.

But you know, I was just talking shit.

Who knew that I was gonna end up in a studio with Rihanna?

So I do y'all think that we should be held at like a higher standard for our old tweets or should people just be understanding like, hey, they used to be human, no, or it's not used to be We're still humans.

I think it depends on what the tweet is.

Okay, talking shit about Rihanna is one thing, but other things that can be like deeply and real hate, like racist things and stuff, some stuff, uh uh, you're not coming back, or at least from me.

Yeah, there are certain things I think that we can grow.

We can be immature, We can do all kinds of things.

Sometimes you just talking shit because you feel like it.

Sometimes it's fun to get those words off your chest.

Yeah, you know, And I don't think that we should be held to a higher standard.

But I also don't think we really get to choose really up to everyone else.

People do.

But I think that it's not very productive, and what's the point what you mean?

And why are y'all digging.

Up old tweets?

That's what I feel.

I wouldn't know who was on the digging committment.

People we havn't too much time on their hands.

Times where like I've had tweets that have went viral.

I remember, Okay, one time I had tweeted something about loving black men and like allly wanting to be with a black man.

And this is what's wrong with that?

But this was like maybe like a year ago, I guess when I was like younger, maybe like six years ago, I had tweeted, this is my last Negro relationship.

We look at but it's so funny because mind you, I'm tweeting about like black love and like loving black men, and then somebody goes and they finds this tweet and they like this you and I'm like, yeah, I mean cause, to be honest, this is my last Negro relationship.

I still feel that way.

However, black love is beautiful, but but for me, this is my last Negro relationship.

So I just feel like sometimes people have to look at other people as humans.

Like you used to tweet a lot of crazy shit too when you were probably twenty three and twenty four.

But the spotlight is not on you.

Nobody is digging up your old tweets.

I agree with you when you said, if it's something racist, or if it's certain things political views, all of that, nine times out of ten, Yeah, I probably can't turn a blind eye to that, because you probably still feel that way.

You're just more quiet about it now.

But when it comes to like talking shit about celebrities or saying shit about how people dress, or I don't know, just young.

Dumb shit, we were all it's trivial.

We were all doing it.

I used to be tweeting about how Drake couldn't dress back in the day.

I need now now why am I in?

I need?

I used to be like Drake so fine, but like why he be wearing big T shirts all the time?

Like story he was.

Wearing in big T shirts like nightgown he was?

He was, And I've seen deleted all the sweets, but.

To do that, but I feel like we're in a position now you have to, and I feel like you're being oblivious if you don't go back and delete a lot of y'all old stuff.

If you have a Twitter that's more than like five, six, ten years old, you need to I did a whole sweep, girl.

I searched every celebrity name I could think of and deleted everything because I just don't have time for We've seen it happen too many times.

Well, there was it, uh recently where a man he was murdered by his girlfriend and everybody was like, oh my gosh, because he was black and she was white.

This happened in Georgia, and everybody was like, oh my gosh, she needs to be arrested.

Jailer rop until they started digging up his old tweets, right, And this is what I have to ask y'all.

This is like that one in Miami.

It's the same one with the only thing.

So they digging up old tweets to this man, He's like, oh, I wouldn't piss on a black woman.

I wouldn't.

I would rather burn in hell than hold a black woman's hand.

Calling us monkeys and everything under the sun.

Everybody's like, oh, you on your own rested.

They said literally pressed in preference.

You know that was clever.

I like, now, I didn't say it, and i'dn't stand on it.

Because that was.

But I will say so, so in the same breath, we're saying, don't judge us by our old tweet.

Well, I already said racism the door, you know, but we feel strong about that.

Now wait a minute, so I do I do think that it's a line like you said, I agree with you if it's something about like you talking about Drake shoes or you know, like if somebody tweeted something old about me, like oh, Lex wigs was crunchy, they was, you didn't tell a lie?

What about if somebody had like but but if you're talking about, oh my gosh, Lex looks like a monkey with big lips.

Hold on, now that's a different area.

That is.

Yeah, you know what I'm saying.

I would just be very afraid if the dms were unleashed, all the group chats, all of the things that I send in private, the.

Other I don't know what I do now right, This is what y'all need to do.

Every month, I delete my DMS with my friends just in case I get hacked.

But I like, yeah, whatever we get hacked, we're fucking cooked me too, bit Barbara, real bitch, we out of there, well, because me and you I feel like all of us though, to be honest, the three of us me.

Wait a minute, people ever, me and my mama's group chat because she gets unleashed in public.

Our U grew chat that I'm in with y'all.

Well, you know she goes in, she does, she goes in, So yes, I well maybe not.

I'm not gonna lie.

I don't do it every month, but like every like I probably do it.

Like you're me, and how you exaggerate that I.

Lie?

Can you add like every six months?

Probably twice a year.

I do every now and again and again because I had a while where I kept getting locked out of my accounts.

Oh and I was like, somebody is trying to hack my ship.

Me and Dred we already get canceled every other day as it is, I be.

Seeing something like, dang, what they do now, ain't taking Joe.

That's just me existing.

No, But I feel like, maybe because you know us, you be knowing this to Joe.

Other people be taking the things we say at face value and they be so offended.

That's what they got.

What I said the other day, I literally tweeted, oh, CARDI did your big one always let him post you before you post him over there.

You're forty.

Chimp chatter you They said, chimp chatter, What the hell that's racy?

Yeah, chi chatter.

It's crazy.

They said, you are a dirty slut, just like Cardi.

I said, well, I'm in good company because he was having a ball on that boat.

I mean, and am I almost forty?

Yes I am, But I was just We're just having a conversation.

I'm commenting on something because at the end of the day, I'm a woman first, and we have all witnessed what this woman has been going through four years.

So yes, do I know anything about her man that she's with now?

No, they'd be like, oh, but he Oh, he got kids, he got newborns.

All I want is women to have a good time and get out of a rut that they in.

That's clapping for she's having a good time.

It's hard and he's looking good.

Now he fun as well.

Let the girl have fun.

Who cares she's gonna go off and get married tomorrow.

That's not what we're saying.

Nobody said that rooting for that either, you know.

But it's like when we try to show girl power.

I got caught said that was so nasty.

And so very mean shill.

But that's why we were talking about earlier.

I had to take like, I deactivated my Twitter because I just feel like I did.

Too after you told me that, and I caught literally you told me, and you went on your ass because is usually the villain.

So I was like, well, I'm good.

Funny thing is I don't even be being a villain.

I just be eating like thoughts, and people get offended, and a lot of the time it's.

Not even directed personally towards other people.

It's just my opinion.

But I feel like, because I'm the messenger, people just be like, Oh, this stupid ass beach.

She thinks she's a bull of us.

All I saw with you where they was done with your ass was the watch thing.

Sure, I took my Apple watch off and put it into my bag and put my put.

My my mother, but it was on with that dreas what I'm saying, yeah, y'all, y'all for jewelry.

I just did it because I saw a wedding photo a bridesmaid, a bridemaid as Nannie would say, and she had she didn't even put the decorative band on.

She just had that black band on and I said, well, this looks very thick and jim asque at a wedding and you have on a gown with this rubber band on your wrist, like I don't know what.

Yeah, you weren't wrong the girls and they.

Don't even know they need saving and they be getting mad at me, and it's like, fine, don't.

Take my advice and keep playing it white, I mean, with your ball down.

I started Poor Minds the other day too, and I always retweet the positive comments, but it was some girl who was like, I can't believe poor Minds has gotten so popular.

Y'all love listening to dumb bitches, And.

I was like, damn.

But then it also be like, well who else should have got popular?

You?

Probably not?

But again, poor Minds, we have fun.

What's wrong with black women having fun?

And this is not meant to be like anything deep intellectual.

Can we have a good time?

It's in the comedy category.

God damn it, loud, right, that's Adam Sam.

We really are though no, I wasn't being I noticed.

I know.

I mean, right, we are the theos we are and that's what I'm saying, and that's why we was top sixty.

Oh every week exactly Top sixty comedy podcasts, Apple Podcasts.

But I'm just saying, like I think, if anything, that's why people.

Get so upset, because you've had such a good time and we've been ourselves the whole time, and they're like, I can't believe these bitches made it this far.

And I laughed, how dare you laugh?

What Nigga said?

Broke?

People should never laugh?

Damn, black women should never laughing.

Broke no more, and we still laughing.

I thought y'all was with me when I got rid of my three dollars became visible this year.

Wait a minute, ain't I said?

God?

Damn, I thought we was upgrading to gether.

But why y'all think that black people?

I'm not even gonna say black people.

Let's just say minorities because I don't want to pinpoint black people.

No, it's definitely not like, but like, why do y'all think minorities are like that as a whole?

Like we're rooting for people until they make it or until they start doing something significant.

It's like, yeah, they're my girls, I'm fucking they so fucking funny, and then as soon as you make it to that point, they're.

Like you because you said it earlier, because a lot of times people feel like it should have been.

Them's almost like they tricked themselves into thinking that they're good people because oh, well, i'll let you do this, I'll bring you along for this because I'm in a better position.

But when those tables turn, which they usually do, they don't like it.

Energy shifts down, They're jealous and now they're questioning, why are you and not them nitpicking every little thing you do.

I think it's something that is really and truly internalized and it has nothing to do with whoever they're talking about.

It's really them.

They ain't even that funny, and I don't my personal experience.

I don't think it's like a minority thing.

I think that's more of like a character flaw because I agree ninety percent of our audience is black, right, so of course my critique ninety percent of the time is going to come from black people, yeah, and black women, So it's not fam Because I realized that when we did the Australian thing with them, that it was some people in the comments like why she's so loud, because bench I'm loud, that's just who I am.

I can't help, but that's who I am, So I think it's more of a character thing, like if you don't like somebody, don't tune in, don't comment because I will say, I don't like when people try to pinpoint, oh, black people, we only do this to each other.

It's really not that because if your audience is ninety ninety five percent black, that's where your critique is gonna come from.

Now, I don't really interact with a whole lot of others across the board, like in any aspect of my life.

I'll just be honest.

I do like a lot of British comedies, yeah, things like that when I'm watching it on the Telly, But outside of that, I don't know.

So I only see stuff really online and they be doing it a lot.

I don't know if I could say one is more than the other.

I don't know why we are so hard on each other, though, I do think is basically rooted and jealousy though, even if they don't really feel like it, or just trying to like validate themselves by putting somebody else down.

I hate when people feel like they have to do that or even once is like paying you a compliment but instead of just paying you the compliment, they give someone else a dig yeah, or they make a dig it's something you had done before.

Oh, this is so much better than that, instead of just saying you look nice today.

I don't know what that's about.

It's just like it's a weird, mean, girlish kind of thing.

But the boys do it too, Drev.

Let me ask you this.

So, when you hit your global status with your US and everything you want to do, who do you think is gonna hate on you more black people are white people?

To be honest black people, I disagree wholeheartedly.

I think so I know, So what do you think I was gonna say black people too?

I say no, because I think a lot of like white women, they cannot stand to see something, especially a black woman, be ahead of them.

I think when all the think pieces start and this and that around things that you do, it's gonna come from white women.

That that happens a lot in the United States.

So I think when you travel more and you go places outside of here, it's not really like that.

I think that black women we be our own biggest enemies.

A lot of the time.

We always against each other instead of trying to come together because I think we look at a lot of things like it's a competition, which, if we really gonna get deep about it, I think it steems way back from slavery to gym crow laws.

All of these things are reasons why as black women, we look at each other as competition and we just can't be happy for one another because it's like your success means my downfall, when in reality that's not what it means.

We can all come together and do things collectively.

But it's like even with us, like and I'm sure Kekey, because I was gonna ask Kekey too, I'm sure she deals with the well, I know you deal with the same things.

I've seen all comments too.

People are always putting us against each other as black women.

Me and you are doing something together, Keiki and Adina are doing something together, but people can't help but try to put us against each other.

And it's like you said, fire for cent of our audience are black women.

So guess who it is in the comments that's doing it?

Black women.

I can't speak to what white women are gonna do when that's not our audience.

Yet I get there, but I guess because I'll chat with y'all when I get right, I guess because I see it.

Like just like for an example, like we can talk about like the things that are going on with like big, big celebrities.

But like I said, a lot of times when I'm scrolling, I be ending up on the side of TikTok.

I'm know I'm not supposed to be on, but it be a lot of times I'll be seeing white white people be so bold on there.

Yeah, so bold on there.

And like I said, I feel like when it comes to Beyonce showed it with Cowboy Carter, the white women showed they ass Beyonce's biggest hater is white women period.

Like it's I mean, I don't know that's why, because I know a lot of black people personally that have no reason to think that Beyonce doesn't deserve all of the like praise that she is with They're still like, I think she overrated.

And that's somebody you cannot trust, and that's.

Somebody you can't trust other than the fact that everybody else loves her.

So it's like, well, let me just say I feel like she overrated.

I don't really feel like she did great.

I was having a conversation with one of my elders.

I won't say who, somebody in my family, and they were just like, you know, Beyonce is cool, but I just she don't give me that feeling that Aretha Franklin and Patty LaBelle and Anita Baker, those were singers, Like I'm not saying that she can't sing, but I'm just saying like she she's not on their level, and she don't make me feel like that deep down in my soul, the way that they used to make me feel when they came out with albums What Sorrow.

Well, I don't think that's hey.

I think that's just versus somebody saying this is not country.

She does not deserve this, she sucks.

They didn't say she sucks.

They just said I don't get that same feeling.

So it's a difference between critiquing somebody and have an opinion and just flat out being a hater and being mean.

Just because I would like or black women to be our allies because we all black, I would love that, however, not the allies.

I would love for us to be allies because we're all black.

But at the end of the day, like I just feel like hate be coming from everybody.

It goes back to what y'all were saying earlier, which I think y'all both made a really good point.

It's more of a character flaw, yeah, than a race thing.

It's definitely something internal.

I hate that we feel like there can only be one, even like whether people are pitting y'all against each other or like it's like, oh, well, Kik, how do you feel about poor mind's doing this?

I feel great.

Those are my friends.

I am so proud of them.

What else would I feel?

Do you think I'm supposed to feel like I should be doing what they do?

We're different people.

It is in people, and whether they think it or they want you to think it, I don't know what it is.

But we've got to collectively get out of this mindset that there can only be one or two or three.

There's not room for more people.

The Internet is big, it's not going anywhere, I hope, and there's room for everybody to do so many things.

Do you only buy one lip gloss?

Do you only watch one show?

Do you only wear one ounce?

Because I don't only buy one?

I like a variety.

What you like?

You know?

Sometimes you buying cans already.

Let me know you ain't real bean connoisseur.

That's that's all for the baked beans that take all day finish.

I said, it depends on if I'm doing like a red beans and rice bag beans.

If I'm doing a baked beans can of beans, you need a variety.

Baked beans with bag beans, you're nuts.

You gotta be eighty seven a variety of things, you know what I'm saying.

Certain though, for certain situations.

Well, I do have a question, though, how.

Do y'all feel about being in this space that we're in and everybody with the cancel culture?

Do you ever feel pressure to make sure like versus back in the day when you first started doing cocktails, you could speak more freely.

Now, do you ever feel the pressure to where you feel like you can't be yourself because you can't really say what's on your mind all the time out of fear of being.

Canceled sometimes or having like some sort of backlash for sharing my opinion.

Because when I shared on something that I consider light, people be real mass.

So it's like if I.

Really let something out or like you know, you might have a slip of the tongue and say something not exactly how you mean it, and it get misconstrued.

I've been working at communicating better, but you know, one day at a time, y'all still don't know.

What words mean, so that can be difficult.

But it's hard, and it's like, Okay, you want to make sure that you get your point across, make sure that you deliver in your talking.

But then it's like, eh, I probably shouldn't say that because they're gonna be too mad.

But I think people also don't consider people's experiences, like I feel this way because I've been through something, So how can you cancel me or take that away from me?

This is what my experience is.

Forget even always one that exists on a platform and says I hate men.

All men are bad and they're like, oh my gosh, this stupid girls gonna leave.

Y'all don't know what she's been through in her experience with me, and y'all don't know what her dad, her uncle, her brothers are, any experience with men that she's had.

So you have to understand where people are coming from.

So I think we're coming from in the society now a closed minded point of view.

I don't agree with her cancel it.

I think people want you to lie though, because I think I've said this before on the show, Like people have said like they'll be like, oh, I feel like Drea acts like she's perfect and she hasn't been through anything versus Les.

I feel feel like, you know, she tries to understand different people's perspective, which is fair.

I do feel like you try to understand different people's perspective with me.

It's not that I haven't tried to understand the perspective.

I just ain't been through that.

So what do you want me to speak to Do you want me to lie and be like, oh, yeah, I've been through that to make you feel better when I haven't.

So I don't think they expect you a lot.

I guess what they mean so more is like hypothetically, I guess what I try to do is like, let me try to put myself in their shoes and see why and understand why they did that.

Sometimes I feel like you don't have their shoes though, huh, I said sometimes.

Sometimes I haven't.

So and this might be a little bit extreme, but like if like somebody says, oh, I lived under a bridge, Have I lived under a bridge?

Absolutely?

Not, but maybe I can understand their circumstances that got them there because I try to take myself out of lexp shoes and look, Okay, what went on?

What is there?

So I don't think necessarily is oh I've been through that, because I haven't been through a lot of shit.

But I guess I just try to be understanding just because I have been through some things that people are like, how the fuck did you get there?

You know?

So I don't think it's necessarily, but some that's the beauty of life.

Everybody's brain works different.

I don't want people to think like me.

I don't want I think that's what brings interest to the show too.

Why would y'all want two people who sit here talking about exactly the whole time.

That's boring.

I agree.

I try to look in all aspects of my life, put myself in somebody else's shoes, try to understand how they get there.

Sometimes I really just be confused, because, bitch, how did you get here?

Kyl?

There are so many things you could have done.

Like if you said, have I slept under a bridge?

Yes, I would be like, now, lex you know, it's a few things you could have did before we got to this.

Point, but I do try to understand that's where I be.

Mill Bridge.

I would have because sometimes that's how I'd be, like, well, playing devils.

Yeah, it's difficult, but it's also like I think we all across the board, the listeners and the host, we gotta be okay with people just not liking it.

I wish that some people who don't like it would just go away, you know, and shut up.

But it's like, hey, this is.

My opinion, this is my take, and if you don't like it, if you feel a way about it, that's okay.

This isn't for you.

The sooner we all realize that everything ain't for everybody, the better, but it is.

It is hard.

And then like even when it comes to thinking about people wanting to cancel you based on your opinion or how you treat stuff, I just really feel like people be slow because sometimes I think that they read too deep into things.

I think that they don't understand.

They're not paying I don't know what's happening, but something upstairs is not clicking.

I think that's the beauty of conversation, that's the beauty of humans that we don't think like, yeah, I'm not going to cancel somebody because they don't think the same way as me.

How ignorant is that?

Sure, that's how you learn people, that's how you understand people, and that's how you have the skill of conversation.

A lot of times people get mad because when people come sit on this couch, they're like, oh, well, Dre and Lex should have fought back.

It's I am not here to change your way of thinking.

I am here to just listen to you talk and be like, oh you think this way.

I think this way.

This is not I'm not here to like educate somebody.

Poor mind is not here for that.

And the whole time I don't even be hearing how nobody thinks.

That's just y'all exactly.

I was gonna ask y'all, have y'all ever said something and as soon as it came out of your mouth you kind of had a little regret, whether it was you misspoke and you knew that it didn't come out like you meant it and you thought you might offend somebody that you didn't intend to.

Yeah, or absolutely yeah, absolutely.

If people say something about it or we cut it out, well, at this point, yeah, we just be cutting shit out.

Yeah.

Like that's because right after I say it, if I know I said something, I'm like, oh shit, let me take shaye right now, time simp.

I'll be saying something so it pops up in the trance.

Yeah yeah, let this out.

Make sure I do.

Oh yeah.

But when we were younger, for sure, because you know, back then, we didn't have the luxury of having people editing our videos and stuff like that, so we would just upload stuff.

And I don't think even back then I knew that you could cut YouTube videos once they were up.

So I remember we had a specific video and we had said something about like the LGBTQ community or whatever.

We ended up having to get it cause y'all was talking spicy.

Well, it wasn't that we were talking spicy.

We said h improper term, improper term, and there was I'll go ahead, I'm sorry.

No, yeah, And I was just gonna say.

We had somebody on the show who was part of the LGBTQ community and they were just like, yeah, y'all need to take that out if y'all can, because we sent him the episode and he was like, yeah, y'all need to take that.

It was a story i'all told too, shout out to Jerome.

I know it, but Jerome, but because the one thing I love about him is like he's not here to cancel us.

He's here to educate us.

And I think that's how everybody should be.

Instead of calling somebody ignorant and saying you want to cancel them, educate them on why how did they are ignorant?

Yeah?

Educate them because making people are ignorant when it comes to things like that, Yeah, the terms and stuff and using the words.

For me, it's important to use the right word.

That is how I feel.

So when I learned something, I want to use the words because to me, it's like it's nothing to give somebody respect by calling them the name that they are asking to be called.

It is very I don't like when people mispronounce my name Kiara.

They'll say other things and it's just like yeah, and it's like, I told you, what does it cost you to do that?

I don't care how you feel about it.

People call me dri Dria off and you know what's crazy.

I know y'all gonna talk about me in the comments.

I get people's name wrong and I'm not kidding.

I funk people's you said it earlier.

I can't help it.

I'll be country, I'm stupid, I'm slow, I'm a little.

When I see your name, I say it how I see it.

You know what I'm saying.

But when they correct you, yeah, no, I'll be wanting people to correct me, correct me.

I'll be like I'll be trying, y'all, I really be trying.

Honest mistake.

I'm okay if somebody says something to me to let me know.

But when y'all just don't like it because we got a difference of opinion, Well, girl, I don't like what you have to say what you did either, because there are some things I feel very strongly about, and I will block you and I won't talk to you.

I don't care who you are, but you not what it'd be like, I don't even know what you did because I didn't know that she was here.

Actually, what may be so irritated because if you have such a strong opinion, go start your own platform.

You can.

I just think maybe they did, and maybe they did, and we don't know about it exactly.

So that's what I'm saying.

Like, sometimes I just be feeling like when it comes to people you just don't have to be here versus spewing negativt.

And I'm not gonna lie.

That's why I always say I think poor minds.

We have reached a space where like sometimes people are tuned in like some it's gonna be people that tune in today that are here for Kiki.

Yeah, Like I hate poor minds, but I love Kiki.

I'm heading for it.

Yeah, but I think that's why I'll be having a ball over.

I love lex P because they know what lex P is.

They know I'm loud, they know I'm missy.

I don't have to hear that because I saw a TikTok today of this girl and she was making fun of Keiki Palmer because she was like the god, yes, the guy, Yes, Kiki is so loud.

She saw this, She's so that.

It's like, why are people girls with a lot of personality?

People?

If you get on, if we get on your nerves so bad, just don't watch.

Stop trying to make girls with big personalities dim their lights or tell them to shut up.

It's very rude.

It's not nice.

I think we need to think of a name for that.

You know, they got fat, phobic, homophobic, personality.

Let me be loud and peace's justus sensitive ears.

Yeah, maybe maybe they just be.

But listen, if you were listening to Key Key Palmer and you don't like loud people, why the fuck are you tuned in or turn the volume down?

That's I like Key.

I agree she's loud, but I like her.

That's what I'm and I think it's just she has so I was to her on a lower volume on some of the other ones, and it's great.

My ears be hurting, y'all.

You are loud, you know, but I would just turn it down down.

Y'all know, y'all know what the fuck going on.

Bitch, I'm loud.

I got the scream.

I got to get the same thing with Wendy Wendy Wow.

Love people for who they are, and if you're not a fan of them, please just stop stop talking about because I hate when people say I love you Lex, but I love you Drea.

But house can keep they butts when it comes to me.

That's what I'm saying.

Leave me alone, Spange.

You don't even gotta say nothing.

You got to say nothing.

I love the black people, though they'd be mine.

I love blacking people like and I don't care if it's.

From you food.

Welcome to the block.

I love yes because at the end of the day, yeah you are a viewer, but you're one person.

Good luck fight of the ship next week.

Well yes we did, Yes we did.

Actually, bitch, dra just blocked your assy'll be weird.

Sometimes I think the worst thing like talking about people's looks, because you know you can't help that.

Now, some things you can't help, you know, with the look of doctors and things like that.

But personality is people's personality.

Stop telling people that are wrong for who they are, Like, that's just so nat Like she was just going in on the video and it was just a lie about you being loud, know about she said, I thought that.

But no, I mean I do feel like you can change things about your personality.

I think people can change whatever they want to change.

You can change things about your personality.

But I think when people are complaining about things that aren't necessarily harming them, you just don't like this about this person, you should just stop listening.

It's not like, oh, they have misogynistic views, or it's not like they're putting out bullshit ass propaganda and making women feel like, oh you don't need to be a wife anymore.

Being a wife is so.

Nineteen sixty three, or whatever the case may be.

Like, if a person just doesn't like you for who you are, don't listen.

But some people do need to change their personalities.

Actually, well they say some people do need to do some character development.

Yeah.

Now, I also think that there are people out there who want so badly to be liked.

That's a different type of character flaw to me, because those people, it's like they're constantly changing their personality.

So what I see critiques about that, I understand that.

Or I'm watching something like different shows, reality shows, for example, and I feel like a housewife walks in and she flip flops.

Depending on who she's sitting at dinner or lunch with.

That is something where I can understand somebody saying something about the personality.

But again, just don't watch because exactly like, if I see somebody on a podcast and on this podcast you this way and on that podcast you that way, Well who are you?

Yes, across the board, if people don't like you because you just consistently who you are, well.

You don't like me.

You just don't like me.

Last week, I'm gonna be mean this week.

I'm gonna go out.

I'm out on cocktails.

I was loud in Australia and I'm a lie when I see you.

Yeah yeah, anyways, Yeah.

I just think people gotta calm down with being so critical of everyone else about things that don't really matter.

Just have a good chance.

I don't want to have.

No, they don't.

They really don't, which is sometimes I feel like while we got into these space because we were all just having fun and it was.

Out of it, I'd be like, it's so nice.

I used to feel that way with friends, and that was how I landed on the topics for the show, because when I would talk about my dating experiences or my sex life, I was feeling a lot of judgment.

And I wasn't even doing nothing too wild cats before Cocktails, just in my life, okay, because when I started Cocktails, I had all of this, all of this history to share stories about, so it wasn't even in real time, but it was like talking to my friends from college or friends from high school.

Some people would be entertained and other people.

Are like, oh, we need to do this because you'll never get married, you never get this, or you never get that.

Well, girl, everybody's not trying to collect four husbands by thirty.

You know, like all of us are in a different path and I'm just having fun.

I'm trying to figure things out.

What's wrong with that?

So it was nice to start a show.

And at the time, it's like, Okay.

I'm in this.

Period of like feeling liberated and trying to figure myself out, but being okay with where I'm at as far as like my sexuality was concerned, and being single and just really enjoying that so that I'm not waking up one day and regretting it and turning into god knows what in the middle of a marriage.

You know, it was nice when people started listening and then I realized, oh, there's lots of other people out there like me, and it was easy to look at the good stuff and tune out the bad stuff.

Sometimes it's just like those negative comments.

I hate that.

It does that.

It's like a cancer.

You can have two thousand positive comments and you see those three that stick out that.

Are just nasty.

Yeah, it does.

I be crying.

You be crying, well, not in the comments.

But just like when but yeah, in real life, like I've definitely cried over like the comments I'm cuting friendship, Yeah, friendship, But like when it comes to the comments, it don't even make me cry.

It just be like, fuck you weak ass house because y'all stupid as fucking y'all can't do what the fuck I'm doing.

Fuck And I would probably if I said that, I would read it in that voice.

Yeah, facts, facts, facts, But then I'd be like, but at the end of the day, like, for real, do fuck y'all block pab not for my feelings to be hurt, for real, Like, let me just block her because if I call me next week, it's gonna hurt my feeling.

Like I think people felt bothering yahyah.

With whatever they choose to say and how they I remember this girl she had DM me.

This wasn't initially, it wasn't to be me.

She wanted some help or something, right, So she sends me a GoFundMe and I can't remember what was going on.

I think this was one of the This happened to be a time when my grandfather got really sick before he passed, and I.

Forgot about the message.

I'm sorry, but I wasn't in a position to really help her write that second, I'm trying to help my family.

She sent me an old, nasty message, and then she was like, don't even bother responding.

I wonder if she watches y'all show.

Probably I won.

But she was like, after all I've done for you, I was like, wait, what by watching the show?

Like that's a trade off.

You were asking for help and you don't know what I'm going through.

I say all that to say, like, she sent me this long message, told me I gave her my ask to kiss and all this other stuff, and it was just like, well, hey, actually, if you would have caught me at a different time or just sent the link again, I probably would have sent you some money.

She blocked me, but I was like, you never know what somebody's going through.

So when people are on there writing these mean comments, is saying all this stuff and asking for stuff, and then you cussed me out because I didn't donate.

I didn't cause you to go through what she was going through.

You're not sick.

You made a bad decision.

I won't tell all your business, but you made a bad decision.

And who you talking about?

She gonna be in the comments, I'm sure I'm not why.

I never know.

And so when I see people, because I've seen people leaving comments and stuff, y'all do were just talking about anyone really like.

Y'all don't realize these real people.

Like you're watching a character on a show, but the character is attached to a person.

Given don't care.

But we're supposed to care about everything that they think matters and don't because they want because we're.

The only ones that don't.

Yeah, it is very unfair.

All right, So now it's time to get into the bed.

The bed about happy.

Okay, does sex count if you didn't finish?

Because personally, I don't think it does.

I think it's circumstantial.

I hope it is.

It better be turnal means little.

All the reason I say it's circumstantial.

But because if it's penis shaming.

Now, oh, they said that, I'm always height shaming, y'all.

Niggas be short, and that's just what it is.

They're not saying all I'm not saying some of y'all.

Yeah, I don't want a short king necessarily though, No medium height.

About to say, you have to say, what boy is not medium height?

He's like five nine, No, he's not I'm five not She said that, like he's great.

Really nine cow?

Oh, he's being serious cow like five eight in his shoes he find but that's one.

No, he five eight for real?

No, when you said five nine that part, I was like, that's in his shoes.

Oh but anyways, anyway, I'm gonna lie.

I think it's tall to me.

She's not even going to me.

Do y'all remember that?

Mean?

No?

Okay, So I think it's circumstantial.

So I think if it's the first time y'all had sex and he didn't make you nothing, unfortunately, though it is a body, it is a body.

But like if like I'm having sex with my man and he came before me, they didn't count get me some more, you see what I'm saying.

So like if he said, oh, man, we just had sex this morning, No we did not, did not.

I didn't finish.

But if it's like the first time, you can't say, oh, me and him never had sex?

Why not?

I mean you who was there to see it?

Were you there?

You can unless it was a time where I had a third party witness.

Maybe I don't care what y'all said.

There's no proof.

I need receipts, timeline screenshots because.

No it's deleted.

I don't know.

I don't remember you unless it was just like it was still very very enjoyable and I wanted to count it will county.

But if I say no, no, it never happened.

Yeah, I'm real good.

I can get real delulu, my body, my choice exactly.

H If I say it, don't count me, you don't count because who won't tell?

Who don't know besides me and you?

It's your word against mine.

But hate unless you got footage.

But like when men none, it's like it's done, like the sex is finished.

It's like that's so upsetting.

That is so rude, because you need to get down there and do something else.

You need to be like a preacher boy.

I just want to taste it.

That's what you need to go down there and do something.

I'm leaving here with something.

Work on that pale moon.

You feel me musty pussy and all.

Yeah, I don't care.

You should have got it when it was fresh.

Your bad, your bad.

I came here freshidding actually, guys, because I just.

Want you to have it.

Whether it's musty or it's fresh, you just need to get it you know, different mustard fear.

Sometimes I don't wanted it for you.

You have been walking around the house a little bit sometimes I've been.

You know, I'm thick.

Them thighs don't roll together a little bit.

It's not it's muzzing.

It's a musk.

There's a diff's a cave musk.

It the little pussy musk.

Don't ever hurt nobody.

Musk.

It sounds like a great fragrance.

Somebody need We used to trademark thing when I want, when I.

Believe it.

Okay, could you imagine come out with pussy musk?

I wonder what it would smell like?

Yeah, like, okay, if you get your pussy musk bottled up, but then you sprayed up somebody else, because you know how everybody the body chemistry.

I think did that though it was like a candle that's like smelled like her or something.

Eric, I do.

Pussy on my neck is crazy?

There was my neck has a title on my nail from innovative.

Yes, yeah, so yeah, I do think I'm not gonna like if I caught a body.

I caught a body, even if I know it or not.

But like when it comes to like somebody I'm seriously dating.

If you didn't make me nut, no, you need to give it up again because that didn't count.

That session didn't count.

Period.

M Well, I don't like.

If I didn't finish, it does not count.

And I mean he could say the same thing.

I don't know why you would.

I would think your dick is broken.

Okay, yeah, because like what, I'm not very good a lot of things when it comes to dating, but when it comes to that, I am very confident.

All right, let us know how y'all feel them.

I'm curious sects count if you didn't finish, Yeah, I don't.

So now it's time to get into allow a bow bow bell.

You know, I never do throwbacks.

I never do throwback.

So I wanted to do a throwback this week of one of my favorite artists and I never really talk about him anymore, just because he hasn't dropped a project in a long time.

I was listening to the Love Hate album by the dream y'all health.

Everybody in the room was like, do y'all realize?

Like he had his songs meshed into each other.

You need a doctor wrong standby, like they blended whether he was telling a story, they not doing it like that no more.

She Needs My Love is one of the best songs ever.

The Dreams pen is just I don't think we've seen anything like that since The Pin the Ear.

I think that is the beauty when people who really produce and write and sing or perform whichever they do.

I love it.

I love It's just it's different when you know how to do it all versus you putting out somebody else's stuff, because then you can always put that extra.

Yes, she Needs My Love.

It's one of my favorite songs on that album Purple Kisses was Abot Fast Car.

I remember the first time hearing Fast Car.

It gave me Prince Bob's Oh my gosh, this is such an album to listen to that it's so good.

And people always talk about I Love your Girl because they said that was about Libia and it was his diss to Lil Wayne.

Imagine a nigga singing about you and everybody in the club.

This is Lil Wayne during his suck that nigga.

Everybody was saying that, you know what I'm saying, Like the Dream was giving us hit after hit.

This is the album with no skips, so for the youngis listening.

Y'all need to go listen to the Love Hate album by the Dream.

It came out in two thousand and seven.

History was made.

It was.

Yeah, Nibby on the show, I won't not so bad, Yeah, because Nivva have some stories on I need, I need.

I just thought about that life and she seems like such.

A she does she does all right, what y'all jam?

So I've been in my afrobeats bag.

We go in to Dinty December this year.

We have to y'all, we have to be in Legos.

So my Bob is with you featuring on my leg by the Beato.

What you know about all my lave?

I know a little song some but y'all, I love this song.

It's just such a good vibe like I feel like it's given me summer vibes.

It's given me I need to be in Legos.

Laid out what I'm telling you.

They got a little dance to it.

I'm probably doing it wrong.

That that's that's the old day.

That child.

It wasn't even that song another hit it was, Oh I know, it wasn't that song.

It was no, it was that though everybody it was, but they was doing it today was, but I.

Can't remember a song right now.

Do y'all be watching those DJs that's on YouTube at the parties like live streaming, it's not even well maybe originally it's live, okay, but some of the I think something's called like one Bedroom or something like that.

Yes, I do.

I watched the ones when they be at home just mixing.

Yeah, so over the weekend, my friend was showing me some because they were getting into an argument about my piano versus afrobeats, and so they were playing the different playlist.

I wish I could remember, but I heard that artist.

Oh my lad, he's there.

I never know anybody's name.

I just vibe and moved my head.

Y'all need to listen to a fireboys dm L.

He's he's good to the afrobeats.

Okay, he's got something.

That's why I love because we is really each other herself as hooks weren't safe with Okay.

Good baby?

What because who else you don't think it's weird?

This is a bad bitch picture right here?

I was.

This one.

I wish I still had this so I could wear it to the concert.

But yeah, I got a few pictures of me who else would I have.

It's mine that way, If it's lost, you know who it is I'm looking at.

Maybe I got weekly, but she ain't gonna be on there.

She don't even post for pictures.

Saying two Hands to Heaven, Cowboy Carter, that has been my jam other than I've been listening to that songs.

But two Hands to Heaven, I love that one.

It feels good when the weather is nice and you'll roll the windows down and just driving down the road.

I love it.

And yeah, yeah, I weren't talking album, so I'm starting to like.

You know, when you listen to the album when it first comes out, you running in the ground, then you move on.

Now I'm back to Cowboy Card because of course the concert is coming up.

Oh my gosh, Jesus so goodran wait, I got somebody, y'all.

I can't wait for the Tyrant.

Did y'all see her riding that bull?

I said?

I did?

Has been cracking me up on this.

She so funny, She's a hoop hilarious, said, she gives me a licks.

Beginning the tour versus the end of she was like at first, she was, that's how we first day, last time, Like all right, all right, but everybody, the last person I want to say, calm it down.

It's a dude.

Did y'all see the video.

His name is belly Gang Cushington.

He reminds me of if my little cousin grew up and leaned into being black versus the other side.

Right because he had redhead.

He stopped traffic on the highway.

It was a viral video.

The music is good, So if y'all want some rap music, a little hip hop, a little hip hop, I think so.

But he just at the beginning is if I actually he got y'all thought some beats.

Yes, he is good.

I don't know the names of the songs, but I think I listen to everything that's underpopular.

But it's belly Gang Cushington.

He looks a little white, but he is not white, y'all.

He's mixed because he do be saying in words, so just fair warning.

But he's white.

He's like a black white.

But when his thought I was thinking that, I was like that ski.

But that's why I said, my little cousin, because you're little walker.

All right, we're gonna give him a pair.

Don't give him a pair?

And another bout Drew oh, okay, now, before y'all get crazy, because I know y'all comments be This was just something fun Me and my sister were doing.

Her husband he actually does rap, and.

I'm gonna listening to some of his new Music's all right, his name is heavy, but he was making music.

So she just wanted to do this for her birthday.

So he was annoyed, but he helped her write us a song and we went to the studio and recorded.

We had our cameras, it was out.

We were sunglasses in our sweatpants.

We double cupped.

Uh, we had to double cup syrophone things, but we had a lean or nothing.

We just had to keep it regular girls.

And we got chicken wings because we just felt like that would just add to like.

And it was a good time.

I wish we would have made a music video.

Maybe we'll do it.

We do because ain't nobody really heard it, but it's available everywhere and you can even add it on Instagram.

I didn't know he was gonna do all that drill.

So we're going to get into our favorite segment of the week.

Make sure you email us at ask poor Minds at gmail dot com if you want your question answered.

On the show.

And if you are a Patreon, remember you know you can put that in the subject line and you get to skip the lines.

Absolutely.

Patreon is the VIP line.

Okay, want me to read you yep.

You, Hey, ladies.

I have a best friend that I've known since college.

Once we graduated, We've been living in separate states, but would still maintain a close friendship.

The easiest long distance relationship I've ever had, tbh.

But a few years ago, she and another guy friend of mine got into a relationship.

From the beginning, I said to leave me out of it.

I would be a listening ear to her concerns, but would try to give her advice from the perspective of him being just another nigga.

You deserve better, child, move on, but in the nicest ways, because that's still my nigga, but also nigga's gonnanig.

He was her first and only serious relationship, and he ended up breaking her heart a year later.

She missed coming to my city one year to help wait what she missed coming to my city one year to help celebrate my birthday okay because.

The hearter known a birthday was in mom.

Because the heartbreak was fresh and my city reminded her too much of him, which I understood and forgave.

However, even years later, she always reaches out on his birthday just to talk and would say subtle things that hints at insecurity or validation seeking of the women in their city compared to the women in mind take jabs as the type of people out here, etc.

We're grown.

So it's not like I could have stepped out of their connection.

In the very beginning.

That girl was me, what would y'all recommend being the best way to handle these.

Sins?

Must live here and her friend lives somewhere else where, it is very different.

Yes, that's kind of fucked up.

I would feel away if my friend was acting like that.

And I'm just like, did he put a root on her?

Like?

Why is she so messed up about this one year relation?

If you can't come and celebrate my birthday and you can't come to this city because it reminds you too much of him to go outside and touch grass man, and.

I oh that you just need to communicate that with her.

Hey, you know what, I don't like this.

This makes me feel uncomfortable.

We underestimate the power of communication.

So open your mouth and tell her I've had situations I've had I've been in a similar situation like that, and it was just like, hey, leave me out of it.

You know what I'm saying, Like I value your friendship, and I value your friendship.

This didn't work out, but I have to take a step back, and you know, but you're years later.

Yeah, So I think you need to have a conversation with her because it sounds like you don't want to end the friendship.

It sounds like you care about her.

Why you just need to be vocal and tell her how you feel.

Yeah, hopefully when you tell her how you feel and that you know these things bother, you make it.

I would even say, make it more about your friendship and less about this guy.

It's like you are holding on to this idea of your former relationship and I'm still your friend.

I'm the one who's still listening to you, but you won't even spend time with me, Like are we really friends?

Or am I your therapist?

Again?

Betterhelp dot com slash poor minds, because that's where you can go for that, not this.

That's not fair and it doesn't feel good when you're always the one who has to listen to somebody else's drama or their issues, and you're all and you will give whatever to your friend.

You help them through stuff.

You are supportive, if you show up, you do all of that and it's not reciprocated.

And you should just let her know.

You don't feel like she cares about your friendship enough for you.

And I think it's okay to tell people, Hey, I think you can be a better friend to me.

That's okay.

And a true friend is going to receive that information and change because they love you.

You know what I'm saying.

She might honestly not realize it.

She might really have been through the ringer with him, yes, and just two in her stuff and nobody's saying anything.

I agree, all right, Keith, Hey, look can they find you girl and tell them about your new show, tell them to irritate again and everything.

Okay, So you guys can follow me all the social media platforms at Kiki said, So K I K I S A I D S O.

My new show, Xoman Podcast is dropping on Tuesday January Tuesday, June seventeenth, that's gonna be the audio and then Wednesdays will be video.

So the eighteenth and then every Thursday is a new episode of Cocktail Story Discussions.

I also have a book club and other little things.

So if you don't mind listening to my voice and you want to connect more, there's so many different ways to listen to me, see me, and connect with me.

I really do enjoy talking to nice people online, you know.

And so if you just go to my Instagram Peeky said so or Kiki said so dot com, you can find all of that stuff there.

And I really hope that when you guys check out the new show.

That you really enjoy it and leave lots of comments, nice ones and tell them how much you love.

Me on there.

Because this was not an original idea.

I've been hired to do this job, and I would like, do you love it?

Yes, you love it.

It's different, it's fun, and I'm excited about it.

This one again.

I'm just talking to beautiful black men.

Love it.

I can't wait and I'm excited.

Yeah, me too.

I'm excited to see you like in the interview me.

Yes, you do so well at that you do.

And I feel like as your friends who like, we've been knowing about it for a while now this is last Yeah, y'all can't wait to watch, and I can't wait to.

Tuny any y'all.

Make sure y'all support my girl and tune in next week.

Are y'all else?

Little Chris?

Yeah?

Man, oh, I'm early in this song.

Okay, here I go.

You know we had to do it again, right?

I want you to sing all these niggas men.

I guess I'm up a first.

Let me, am, how can you hope that you're fine?

I want to know what you got in mind?

And now I got my feeling like Joey's c girl.

I can't leave you alone.

Take a shot to hit the patron and it's gonna be your breathing out.

You crowdy.

How my mother end up calling her fornight she should let your girl say, shake in sea, pull up, beeps O gun to the GT with me.

She there already ARide.

I was like, because what you get inside, you can't change your mind?

On mean the side of fatip.

But you got a problems, baby there.

Tell me you again.

I'm be the east side boys.

Tell me again my babies, lovers and face.

Oh I got an old baby, yeah, tell me hugain Ma.

Sure you're right, hold before your lovers and faced.

Oh it's a good little bad Sometimes want to be your love, Sometimes want to be your friend.

Sometimes want to hug your whole hand.

Slow deans, want to ric a find, open up your heart because you said I made you feel so comfortable, used to play bad thing like you all grown up like Rudy, hugstable.

I could be your budd.

You could beat me up, play fight in the darks and we both make up.

I do anything just to feel your bud while you got me so messed up.

I don't know, but you gotta stop trip man.

Be a good girl.

Now, turn around and get these weirdies.

You like it?

Like that, you don't have to fight back.

Here's a pillow.

Bite that and I'd be setting separate plays so on holly separate days.

Your legs could go they separate ways.

Ugging.

Baby friends.

Oh it's a good little bab tell me es.