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Dem Boiz Are Busy: Best Of Eps 71-75

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1

Welcome to This is important a production of iHeart Radio, the show where we talk about what's obviously most critically crucially important.

Speaker 2

Let's go.

Speaker 3

Yeah, have you, Blake?

Speaker 4

Have you started every every episode with that?

Does every episode have that?

Speaker 3

At the beginning?

Speaker 2

Uh?

Speaker 5

Would say it's every episode, but it's a lot.

There's always a lot a lot of episodes.

Speaker 3

If you were here, you know.

Speaker 2

It, I kick off a lot that way.

Speaker 3

I'm curious.

Speaker 4

I mean, I'm asking even the ones I was a part of, Like, is that a thing that you do?

Speaker 3

Everyone?

Speaker 2

Do you remember?

Speaker 3

No?

Speaker 5

Simon Rex just tweeted that let's Go is to guys what whoo is to girls?

You know, how like you'd go when you go, like out to a restaurant of bars.

So I think there's a lot of like drunk girls there.

Speaker 6

You just you're like.

Speaker 5

Woo like, yes, bitch, who.

Speaker 2

I gotta say, I'm guilty of that too, Wolf howling a little bit of wooing.

Speaker 3

Yeah.

Speaker 5

I feel like your let's gos are more prevalent than your Blake rides them waves.

Speaker 2

Though he Uh yeah, let's go.

Speaker 5

Whatever's on that hot shit is what Blake's gonna be doing.

Speaker 3

Did you guys see the National Championship game the other night after the Georgia one, the QB was just like, let's go, let's go, let's.

Speaker 2

Go, let's go.

I can't escape it, guys.

Speaker 5

I know, well what it is is.

Speaker 3

Uh, I love it.

I love it.

Speaker 6

Yeah, it's it's it's it's dumb people.

Speaker 5

Uh, really really dumb people who idiots, fucking morons.

Speaker 3

Okay, who are you to judge?

It is a placeholder for a real true.

Speaker 5

Thought fucking idiot bitches now.

Uh, I think it's just people that don't have anything else to say.

Speaker 7

Right, It's when you have no words yourself and you just this is the thing people say.

Speaker 3

And I know, and they'll know that I know, and I know that they know.

Speaker 2

It's an exclamation.

Speaker 3

Dude.

Speaker 2

You can't always think of what's gonna come out.

It's a knee jerk.

You not think about what you're gonna say.

Speaker 5

Yes, I'm saying it's a it's a knee jerk, but it's a new age boo yah, Like I'm more of a boot yall guy.

Speaker 3

Yeah, boom, haven't we covered this.

We've covered this whole thing, right ton.

Speaker 5

Yeah, I'm a boo, I'm a boom shark.

Alaka guy.

Speaker 2

We come back to it a lot because Adam truly is infuriated by the let's go a way.

It's every four episodes.

Speaker 6

Let's stop, let's go man.

Speaker 2

It's never gonna stop.

No, it's never gonna stop.

Speaker 4

It's just you just have to ride the wave.

And right now the wave is huge.

It's cresting, bro, So it's not going anywhere.

Once a wave has that much energy, dog, it keeps going.

Speaker 3

Let's go.

Let me, Adam, let me, let me.

Can I saddle you with something?

Speaker 5

Adam, please saddle me.

Speaker 3

Come up with something better, strap me in your leathers.

Yeah, yeah, like, let's let's get going.

Speaker 2

Yeah, no, too many words.

Speaker 3

First of all, it's for Adam to do.

And that was bad.

I know that.

I think if.

Speaker 7

You seriously put your nose to the grindstone, as I know you do.

Speaker 2

That means doing cocaine.

Speaker 3

Come up with something that's better.

Speaker 5

I'm a grindstoner.

Speaker 3

You know.

Uh, what's your what's your version?

Hi?

Speaker 5

Oh yeah.

Speaker 3

That's cool.

Yeah?

Speaker 5

What about Yes mummy?

Speaker 3

Oh that's pretty good.

Yes, Mommy is good.

Speaker 6

Yes, mummy.

Speaker 3

The new Let's go is kids are saying, she sh a lot.

Now deserve she let's go.

Speaker 2

I think young Doug might have started that.

Speaker 5

One, okay, uh, instead of like, so you just win the national championship.

Speaker 6

The reporter comes rushing up to you, Hey, what.

Speaker 5

Do you have to say?

You just won the national championship and you go, yes.

Speaker 2

Mummy, I wish dude.

Speaker 6

That's way better than let's go.

Speaker 3

That's like a bed, like a people were like, wait, what.

Speaker 5

Is going on right now?

Speaker 3

Yes, mummy?

Speaker 7

We got to get about our own right, Like how will shout that at golf outings to be like I'm a Howard Stern fan or whatever.

Speaker 2

We have it.

It's popos out.

Speaker 3

No, Kevin Feterline has popos out.

Speaker 2

Yeah, we are children of kfit guys.

I do want to one time on the pod have a serious competition where we.

Speaker 6

All, sir, I don't like it, try to sing a.

Speaker 2

Song as well as we can, no joke about it.

Speaker 3

Oh dude, I was thinking about that Blake here it is.

Speaker 5

What do you mean?

Speaker 4

I was singing the old Folgers theme because I got this.

Speaker 3

Okay, should we each try it that?

Speaker 2

Okay?

Speaker 6

Yeah, I'm an Oakland coffee man.

Speaker 2

Yeah I'll start and don't be funny about it.

Speaker 4

No, no, I was testing my mic and I was doing it.

Okay, you ready, O wet my whistle?

Speaker 5

So weirdly, why did folgers give us?

They sent me a mug to in like five k cups.

Speaker 3

Cause they're fucking geez, they get it.

Speaker 4

Yeah, big shout out, yeah, and they have the best theme song of all time.

And here it goes.

Here's my rendition.

Speaker 2

All right, let's hear it.

Speaker 4

The best part of wake No, he's folders in your cup.

Speaker 2

Okay, okay, very good.

Speaker 3

Started off rough, rough, rough, yeah, rush.

Speaker 6

I mean it's cool.

It's cool to hear someone try.

And that's I.

Speaker 5

Think it's well.

Speaker 3

I think I should go ahead.

I want to redo.

Speaker 2

Okay, wait there now, really try.

Speaker 8

The best part of waken Up is fool just in yo cup.

Speaker 2

At the end, he did he kind of pulled the ripcord on school, just in you.

Speaker 5

I think what happened is Durst got a little scared at the end.

Speaker 6

Was he was being a little vulnerable.

Speaker 3

I was scared my career was going to take off.

Speaker 5

Yeah, he was being a little vulnerable by singing, and that that scared him.

Speaker 3

I don't want to get pigeon held as a musician.

You have a very who was last raspy voice?

Yeah?

Speaker 2

Who was that guy in like the nineties?

He had kind of a mullet.

Speaker 6

He was like Rick Ashley.

Speaker 3

Are we talking in the nineties?

Speaker 2

Yeah?

Wait, No, what was that guy's name?

He was fucking cool.

Speaker 3

We're talking about Don Henley of the Eagle.

Speaker 2

No, I'm not talking about Don Henley.

Speaker 3

His name it was Summer.

Speaker 2

What was that guy's name?

Fuck, I'm gonna have to Tom Waits.

Speaker 5

What do you mean?

Speaker 3

Yeah, it was Tom Waite.

Speaker 6

There's a ton of people with raspy voices.

Speaker 2

It wasn't Tom Waits.

It was like, he didn't sing Desperado.

Speaker 3

Brian Adams?

Is it Brian Adams?

Speaker 2

Brian Adams's not Brian Adams, but you are Brian Adams adjacent?

Speaker 5

Okay?

Speaker 3

Did he sing on the robin Hood soundtrack or not?

Speaker 2

He must have.

This guy was built for the robin Hood soundtrack.

Speaker 5

Oh all right, Blake, it was Rod Stewart, obviously, Rod Stewart.

Speaker 3

Rod Stewart, Rod Stewart.

Speaker 5

It's freaking hey, well, Blake, if you don't know, then you don't know, and it's your turn to sing.

Speaker 3

Okay, yeah, right like that, thank you.

Speaker 5

You can't set it up and then try to odds the sing right all right here right here we go, all right.

Speaker 2

The best part of Waking Up is Folgers in yoke up.

Speaker 3

Wow, with the flourishes.

Speaker 6

A little flourish.

Speaker 3

It sounded real.

Speaker 6

Yeah, you have a little flourish on it.

Speaker 2

Thank you, thank you.

Speaker 3

Yeah, that was great.

I mean that was a good rendition.

Speaker 5

Bro.

Speaker 3

Here's what's cool is that, Adam you sing?

Speaker 6

I don't sing, though, and I'm wondering.

Speaker 3

How much better yours is actually going to be?

Speaker 5

The Yeah, come on, yeah, probably not much better.

That's the thing is, I don't sing.

Speaker 3

No, don't preface.

Okay, go ahead, let's hear it.

Speaker 5

The best part of Waking up is Forgers in Yoka.

Speaker 3

Wow.

Speaker 2

That was really good.

Speaker 6

I don't know, I don't know the song.

Speaker 3

I like that you made it your own.

Speaker 2

No, that was really really good.

Speaker 3

It was like a much higher register.

Speaker 5

Arguably the best best part of wake yeh, there you go.

Speaker 3

It's full just and yok ye.

Speaker 2

Now that one has a steak on it.

I like that.

Speaker 5

Yeah, see that's what that's more my range.

I thought it was higher.

Speaker 3

That was skinny Luther right there, Hello and welcome turned out.

Speaker 7

Feeling good, baby yo, So to me, this is how I know I'm old when I'm in a grocery store, because to me, that's a grocery store banger.

Speaker 3

Sure we're old enough at least I'm old enough now that when I'm in the grocery store and a song like that comes on, I'm nod in my head.

Speaker 9

Man.

Speaker 3

Yeah, yeah, for real, They've got some real bangers that hit me at my age, you know what I mean.

Speaker 4

Yeah, it's not worth like analyzing that any further than just a head nod and a smile.

Speaker 2

You know what A song I have that like when I hear it, it just puts a smile on my face.

It is I love your smile, dude.

Speaker 6

Obviously, obviously I've.

Speaker 7

Had that song in my head for twenty years.

That's like my go to I'm lonely.

I'm gonna whistle while I'm taking a leak in a weird gas station.

Speaker 2

If that comes on in the grocery store, I'm dropping the milk and I am dancing a little bit, doing a.

Speaker 3

Shimmy dropping it.

Speaker 2

Yeah.

Speaker 3

Drop.

That's a mess.

Speaker 2

It's a mess, but I can't help myself.

Speaker 3

I might slip.

Speaker 5

I've been deep on my eighties ship for a while now, Okay, I feel like that that was the decade.

I feel like I would have really shined in the eighties.

I love all the music from that era.

I uh, I could you know, wear a letterman jacket?

I feel I feel like I pull off the letterman jacket.

Speaker 3

Talk to me about your eighties?

Speaker 6

Yeah, about my well, I was what I was, you know child?

Speaker 3

No?

Speaker 7

No, sorry about like about what I know.

But you're talking about letter jackets as opposed to like pet chop boys, because the eighties was quite diverse.

Speaker 2

So I'm saying, Duran, Duran, sure, yeah, are you talking?

Speaker 7

You're more like hair band eighties and like are Huey Lewis eightiesz?

Speaker 3

Yeah?

Men at work like the Cure, you know.

Speaker 5

No, I'm more of like talking heads the cure.

Speaker 4

I think I went to the cure.

I went to the cure like almost first in my mind.

Speaker 6

But also I talking heads.

I love, Yeah, fuck you, But also I'll fuck up some Eddie money, dude.

I'm not afraid.

Speaker 3

Okay, all right, there's a lot of people out there that are afraid of Eddie money.

Speaker 5

Dude.

They are well, they're afraid to admit that they like Eddie Money.

A lot of people think that that's not cool.

Speaker 3

His voice is super solid.

Speaker 2

He has the coolest name ever in rock music, Eddie.

Speaker 3

Money, Doobie Brothers, the Doobie Brothers.

That's pretty good.

Speaker 2

I mean that's good, but that's the Doobie Brothers.

Speaker 3

Is great, Bro' like to me, like, that's the greatest of all time?

Is who are you guys?

We're the Doobie Brothers.

WHOA.

Speaker 2

I do really like the new series of Adam playing songs off of his phone.

This is yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 3

I mean his voice is good.

Yeah, his voice is money.

Speaker 2

But that's not his hit, right, doesn't he have a bigger one than that?

Speaker 3

Take Me Home Tonight is pretty damn big.

Speaker 5

Yeah, that's the one, take Me Home Tonight and that Yeah, that was that song, the same song.

That's the one that you want to drink beer on a beach or you want to be on a boat.

Speaker 6

I feel I want to be lazed?

Speaker 3

YEA, well?

Yacht rock?

Right?

That's eighties?

Speaker 2

Right?

Speaker 3

Or is it late?

It's it's mostly in the eighties, was yacht rock?

Oh?

Speaker 2

Maybe it's a deeper cut, But Shaken is a fucking banger by Eddie More.

Speaker 3

What's shaking?

Was that was that song?

Speaker 2

Ll on, let me, let me, let me, let me pull it up a little bit.

Speaker 3

What you got there?

A chocolate pay day?

Dude, I'm eating a fucking one of your guys.

I love it.

Yeah, here, hold on, let's no bullshit?

Great, I don't like to eat bullshit.

Speaker 2

There's there's no way.

Speaker 3

Well, that's the first time I've ever heard that song.

Speaker 6

Yeah, hey, dude, Hey Blake, that song ritch, dude, thank.

Speaker 3

You, quintessential Eddie Money song, Shiver or whatever you called it.

Speaker 6

I played his by far his biggest hit.

Speaker 2

Yeah, uh, and.

Speaker 3

Blake's like no, and then Blake doesn't even recognize it.

Speaker 6

There has to be a bigger hit here.

I'm gonna play you this fucking garbage pail music.

Speaker 2

Right, dude?

Know that was first you're an eighties stripper anthem, Dude.

Speaker 3

That song sounded like a kitchen during an.

Speaker 5

Earthquake, and that sounded like you made something on garage band.

Speaker 2

Like, did you like it?

Because there's actually my band?

Yeah, this is.

Speaker 3

Blakey Money, Freddy my band Freddie Monkey.

Speaker 2

Okay, okay, I know another one that's really good.

What about here we go and hear me out?

Arguably better than take me home tonight?

Two tickets to.

Speaker 3

What he plays on the commercials?

Speaker 2

Right ticket?

Speaker 3

And you know what, I would argue, you don't like it?

Speaker 8

What?

Speaker 6

Yeah, take me home tonight is the is the better of the because.

Speaker 3

What two tickets?

That's only two?

I want more than my two tickets?

Yeah, four tickets to Paradise.

Speaker 5

Well, I think I think he's with his girl or whatever.

You know, but yeah, I mean trips are more fun if you go with like a group of friends.

Speaker 2

You know, he just wants a threesome.

Speaker 3

I want one of you guys in a threesome.

I'd preach.

Speaker 5

Whenever I'm I'm at a truck stop, I just want to like see like how much trouble I could get in and how quickly it could happen, you know, like how quick like if how easy it would be to get meth.

I've never done that, but I mean I would, like, I do want to find out, like how easy it is to get meth at a truck stop.

Speaker 3

Wow, it's easy, is it?

Yeah?

Speaker 4

I think to get meth you just have to be diagnosed with a d D, right, and then you get.

Speaker 2

All the truckers have you want to know where it really goes down.

Yeah, Blake, weighing stations, truck Wayne station.

Right, if you want the good shit, go to the Wayne stations.

That's where they're all pulled off.

They're all doing their their business, zipping up for the drive.

Speaker 3

And you know that because.

Speaker 5

Hey, Blake, that's not a real.

Speaker 2

It is a real thing.

Speaker 3

Why do you know this.

Speaker 5

That's not a real thing.

Speaker 2

It absolutely is truck Wayne station.

I know that.

Speaker 5

Okay, you want to come at me, bro, I.

Speaker 2

Would love to.

Speaker 5

Let's just come.

Speaker 3

Please come at me, guy.

Speaker 5

Wayne stations happen on the side of the road.

It's truck by truck.

That's not where you buy your meth or get your your low end hooker.

That's not where that happens.

Speaker 4

Okay, I bet if you were in the little station, that's like weighing the trucks.

If you're in the booth, you're the one who can have the meth, and you're the one who can be like, hey, here's your myth, playboy.

Speaker 3

You know what I mean?

Speaker 5

Well, sure, I'm saying.

I'm saying, as like a generality, any truck stop in America, I think you can I think there's a high probability of getting meth.

Speaker 6

I don't know if it's at the Wayne station.

Speaker 3

Blake, what is your tele Why this is a way station over a truck.

Speaker 2

Stop, Because truck stops are way brighter, they're way more populated, they have families there getting gas.

The truck way station is truckers only.

No families are pulling over for that.

Speaker 3

But the truck way station, correct me if I'm wrong.

The truck way station is run by the state.

Speaker 6

Right, that's correct.

Speaker 2

I've never gone in a waste station.

Speaker 7

As opposed to just like a private business that doesn't give a fuck what's happening there.

Speaker 5

That is correct.

Speaker 7

And Kyle, you're saying it's like a service window, like they pull up and they go yeah, but there's all on camera.

Speaker 3

I mean they're all on cameras.

Speaker 2

Okay, I got it.

I know where it is.

Three one two, three, rest areas.

Speaker 3

Break check spots where they're checking their brakes.

You know where it really is.

It's you know those those runaway truck rams at the top of that.

There's always a leprechn with Hella mat.

Speaker 5

This is where you get your med.

You take a manhole cover off the street.

Yes, you climb into the sewer.

No, Blake, it's it's a truck truck stop truck for sure, and they sleep in their trucks at night.

No, sure, you can at a rest area too.

That's where people get abducted.

Yes, that's a good place to get abducted.

Speaker 3

Look, I will say this, at a truck stop, you are competing with these hats.

If that makes an.

Speaker 2

Absolutely, thank you.

I'm spending my money on those showers.

Speaker 3

You know, depending on how they only cause a couple of time.

But if you're in there for a minute, it's your pocket literally your pocket change.

You could take a shower and get cleaned up.

It's amazing.

Speaker 5

Yeah, I think it goes hand in hand with someone that buys hats like that also might be in the market for meth.

Speaker 3

You might be a math haad.

Speaker 5

It's the same brain that goes after it, and that's why it's stocked with the coolest hats.

Speaker 3

Right, Come for the hats, leave with the meth, Leave.

Speaker 5

For the math.

Speaker 2

To your point, when if you walk into a good truck stop, like the Flying Jay, the first thing they have is that little like showcase with all the like diamonds, crystals and daggers and stuff.

Speaker 3

Oh yeah, you have to be on meth to buy that stuff, like like guilty sky Mall in the middle of the sky mall with the curvy blades and ship.

Speaker 4

Oh yeah, I mean I did get a sick sweatshirt from one of these truck stops that said it was like a guy that was getting married and he had a frownie face and it said he was standing next to his girl and it said sentenced to wife.

Speaker 3

And I wore that for I wore that forever.

Speaker 5

Yeah, I kind of remember.

Speaker 4

It was white, correct, Yeah, it was white and they look like bathroom imagery.

Speaker 5

Yeah, I remember you rocking that, right, yeah, yeah, yeah, so sick, Yes, mommy, yes, mommy.

Speaker 3

A lot of land.

Speaker 2

Top golf is cool, but there are times when little changes to the game can backfire.

I will take a hard stance.

I freaking hate cosmic bowling.

Do you that.

Speaker 3

Sits like the dark?

The worst I met my wife, Visa.

Speaker 5

That's how you met your wife was during a cosmic.

Speaker 3

It's the worst thing to happen to bowling.

Alleys.

Speaker 7

It's it's explain yourself, go ahead, well why it sucks?

Speaker 4

Yeah, go ahead, because it's not like it's like all these lights, all these distractions, all this bullshit.

Speaker 3

All this black light?

Speaker 4

Are you still wait?

I think we figured it out.

You're scared it's too dark.

No, the game is fine how it is.

It doesn't need these elements.

Speaker 3

You think real aliens are gonna show, don't you.

Speaker 4

I'm not scared of nothing.

Speaker 3

I'm not scared, Kyle.

It's not really cosmic.

It's just dark and black lights.

There's no aliens.

I'm not scared.

So you think it you think it takes away like the pureness of bowlding.

Speaker 4

I think it's it's great for like parties and stuff, I guess, but it's that's.

Speaker 3

What it's for.

It's what that's what it's for.

No, if you're under six.

Speaker 5

Well, it's not if you're trying.

Do you notice they're not doing cosmic bowling tournaments?

Is just for like high school lockings and shit.

Speaker 3

Oh I know Adam was all about some lockings.

Speaker 6

Oh dude, I was trying to stay lock.

Speaker 2

These girls are locked in here with me.

Speaker 6

I was trying to stay locked in.

Speaker 3

No one can leave.

Speaker 2

I feel good.

Speaker 5

And then it's just me hacky sacking in the corner hoping that that impresses one of them.

Speaker 2

Look at these giant bowling shoes still over here.

I'm not going anywhere.

Speaker 3

I'm watching one six two, six hundred three.

Speaker 5

I'm into the tiny sweaty one aggressively hacky, sacking in the.

Speaker 3

Corner, slamming pictures of coke.

Speaker 2

Hey, I'll be right here.

Speaker 3

You want a ball unlimited Coca Cola?

I might have a sprite lader.

Speaker 2

Yeah.

Speaker 6

When I call my mom to pick me up in the morning and I go.

Speaker 3

Oh, mommy, so I'm sorry real quick.

So you're.

Speaker 5

That's where my dad hides his week in an old folger's can.

Speaker 3

Yeah, it really is the best part of waking.

Speaker 2

Up, waking bake.

Speaker 5

I don't know why he hides it, because who's he hiding it from you?

Speaker 2

So you don't smoke his weed?

Speaker 3

Okay?

Speaker 4

Well, also, is he hiding it or just keeping it in a place your.

Speaker 3

Mom will take that ship?

Speaker 2

Yeah, man, roll it up.

Speaker 3

And light it.

Speaker 5

No, you have to go in his shed.

It's behind his toolbox.

It's hidden.

Speaker 6

It's fully like he has to explain where it is.

Speaker 3

Let a man live an exciting life.

Yeah, you know that it's important.

Speaker 6

I think it is, Like you know, it's uh.

Speaker 5

The older generation is still thinking that they're going to go to prison with like eleven dollars of wheat on them.

Speaker 3

I have knives hidden all over my house.

Speaker 6

I believe that about you.

Speaker 4

Also, though Folger's cans were they used to come in a can before these curing things popped off and go in go off.

The cans were telling me about to put stuff in there.

If you saved them, you wash them outright, you could put stuff in them tax screws.

They're for workshops, so you know, maybe your maybe your pop's got something baked in there where he's like, hey, baked in for where he puts his weed, you know, just the storage.

Speaker 6

Can where it's like this is where I get my work done.

Speaker 3

Yeah, get a little screwed up and workshop.

By the way, go ahead, Blake Well.

Speaker 2

I was just saying, like, also, half the fun of smoking weed is when it's illegal and you can get in trouble doing it.

Maybe he's just kind of trying to hold onto that mystique.

You hide your weed, you go off and have a puff.

Speaker 3

That's done.

Speaker 5

Though, you know, I love weed, and I love weed like here in California.

It's fun all the other things like having can you know the company that I invested in having like having that be a legal thing that you could go to the store and buy or any of the like little cookies that you can go buy and little little candies.

Speaker 3

Uh.

Speaker 5

But there is something pretty special about when he was illegal and you had to be like on the side, on the side of like your mom's house, quick quick, taking a few rips before you had family dinner.

Good old days.

Speaker 4

So yeah, So my so I smoke a lot, like you know when I do when I'm on that tip right now.

Speaker 5

Nice, he's nice.

Speaker 4

And I got a three year old, right and my three year old is like like if I have like a fucking peanut brittle cup or something like that, He'll be.

Speaker 3

Like, you eat chocolate.

You you have chocolate?

Right now.

Speaker 4

I come in to like read him a story and I'm fucking smelling like weed because I just went and fucking choked up because I want to do my best in the story.

Speaker 6

Daddy smells like giggles sticky.

Speaker 4

You have sticky kind okay, And he was like, he was like, what do you smell like?

Like I came in smelling like weed and he's like, what is that smell?

And I was like, uh uh, And my wife's like, just say plant medicine.

Okay, plant medicine.

And I was like, all right, cool, I smell like plant medicine, and that's what.

Speaker 5

It is, plant medicine.

Speaker 2

That's a really good uh good weed name.

You should open start that.

Speaker 3

Call it God's burp.

Speaker 5

I would remember as a really young kid, smelling like my mom wouldn't let me go downstairs when my dad was with his brothers, and they'd be down there and they were obviously smoking weed, but what they would do is also just chain smoke cigarettes to mask the smell.

So I never really noticed the weed smell that was that strong.

I would be like, oh, this cigarette smell smells different than it normally does.

Speaker 2

That it's important.

Speaker 6

So do you think you should start to smoke to again to sort of mask the weed smell?

Speaker 3

Or you just wait, what what was that?

You gotta start smoking cigarettes again me to mask it for my kid?

Yeah, or get off the podcast or get off the pod.

Okay, well you know that's a eat choice.

Speaker 2

Hallo, here we go again.

Speaker 5

If it's you and your girl and and another guy is going to be involved, it can't be that.

It can't be a homie.

Speaker 3

It has to be your high school.

Speaker 2

It has to be.

Speaker 5

It has to be the head of your rival dojo.

Speaker 2

You gotta bury the hatchet somehow, and better way than to go on a romantic thing.

Speaker 6

To bury the hatchet and your girl bury him something.

Speaker 5

Okay, that's how you fuck take me home tonight.

Speaker 7

But maybe be cool to have your girl like Okay, So you find your nemesis from high school and go, yo, you get a threesome.

He sees your girl, he's like, yeah, babe, let's do it.

And then you've already told your girl and she's down with this because she knows you hate this guy to be like to be like, you can't fuck harder than that.

Yeah, And even if his dick's way bigger than yours, she just is like, why is your dick feels so weird in me?

Speaker 2

And you go, babe, this is a great prank.

Speaker 3

Yeah, yeah, you'd shame him.

Speaker 2

Well yeah, yeah, exactly, I love this prank while you're watching him fuck your girl.

Speaker 3

You're shaming him while you're watching.

Speaker 2

Yeah, you know.

Speaker 3

She's doing it, and you're looking there like, hey, honey, have a good time.

Speaker 7

Yeah, And the best part is that, like behind your back.

Later she runs off with him because the dick actually was good.

Speaker 3

And then they get married.

Okay, and you're on the street one day and they pull up in a ferrari.

Speaker 6

Okay, now you're talking.

Speaker 3

Yeah, and they handle you a million dollar bill and you're like, poned you and you go, oh my god, thank you.

And he goes, that's not real, bitch, and they peel out Unis.

She gives him head right, Okay, that's the prank.

Speaker 6

That's a fun press.

Speaker 2

That is a fucking that's a royal pony, bro.

Speaker 3

And then you just walk into traffic.

Yeah, that's funny, but nothing hits you.

Speaker 2

And then you nothing hits you but a truck.

But it doesn't kill you.

Speaker 6

No, that truck hits you.

You're dead.

And then that's the ultimate prank.

Speaker 2

Dude, right right.

Speaker 7

And then they come to your funeral and you're like, I guess I hope they're here because you're dead.

Speaker 3

You don't know.

Oh man, you know there's a funeral.

You know there's a funeral, but nobody comes to it.

Pissed now because you did because you lost all your teeth a long time ago, and they don't know who you are.

You're just a John Doe.

Speaker 2

That's the branks good because you didn't have any teeth to identify the body because you lost them all because you were just methadic.

Speaker 3

Yeah, so that's the threesome you.

Speaker 2

Want, absolutely absolutely all right.

Speaker 3

That's great, good, good deal, Bud.

Speaker 5

We really missed the boat by not starting our own by employing Blake's stepdad, yes for our company and have the meat jerking beef boys release their own.

Speaker 3

Batch because his stepdad makes.

Speaker 5

There's his Blake's stepdad makes the best fucking beef jerky I've ever had.

And I am a connoisseurer.

I eat beef jerky five times a week.

I'm always jerking.

Speaker 2

Out the jim.

Yeah, you're a jerker.

Speaker 5

I'm a jerky boy.

Speaker 3

You're a five times a week.

Speaker 5

Yeah, dude, that's why I'm That's why I'm so poofy looking for what a meal?

No, it's a little snack this afternoon, delight.

Speaker 3

How much you're eating a bag?

Because I go through a bag.

Speaker 5

No, not a not a whole bag, not a whole bag, just a few, just a few tender strips.

Okay, Okay, I've been fucking with old trappers.

What I've been fucking with?

Speaker 2

Let me ask you, do you ever go into the turkey jerky zone or are you purely a beef?

Speaker 3

Why?

I do.

Speaker 5

When I'm trying to uh to not have to have a bloated head, I go, I get the turkey, uh, and then I just go jacklings, you know, because some of the other turkeys you don't.

You can't trust it right now?

Speaker 3

Do you like it moist?

Man, I'm starving.

Speaker 7

I feel like there's a whole new genre of jerky where it's like actually moist, it's still kind of juicy.

Speaker 3

I love that.

That's the ba.

Do you like it dry?

Speaker 7

Where you got to fucking like tear a couple of teeth out to get into it.

Speaker 2

It's a delicate balanced dude.

Speaker 3

No moist.

Speaker 6

I don't like it too wet.

Speaker 2

Yeah.

Speaker 5

I don't like when my hands look like I just ate some ribs or something.

I'm like, I'm just trying to be a jerky boy.

Usually it's like while I'm driving or something, you know.

Speaker 3

Put a pin in that we're gonna go back to Jersey boys.

Speaker 2

But you put the little pack of jerky between your legs and you kind of just get down in there.

Speaker 6

Yeah, just some crotch nibbles.

Speaker 2

M my boy.

Speaker 6

Remember when I bowled a three hundred and we bowling.

Speaker 3

That is so much different.

Speaker 2

Boy and I and I freaking slayed a Slayer song on guitar Hero, but that doesn't count.

I still can't play a list.

Speaker 3

Don't tell yourself short, that's cool.

Speaker 5

I bet you could do something good.

Speaker 2

I just had a memory about all of us.

Kyle, were you there when we bowled Chris Hardwick Hardwick?

All four of us bowled against one Chris Hardwick, and we got murdered.

Speaker 3

Yeah, he beat us.

He was sick, that guy.

Speaker 6

Uh he scored some points.

Speaker 3

Yeah he did, Yeah he did.

Speaker 4

Yes, Wow, there it is, Adam.

Have you ever owned your own bowling ball shoes or show.

Speaker 6

There was a summer.

Speaker 5

Yes, I stole several pairs that then were my shoes, but uh.

Speaker 3

Icky frowned upon in the community.

Speaker 5

No, it was.

It was in in I think seventh grade or eighth grade.

Me and my buddy Danny Hendrix.

We went bowling every day.

It was a dollar a game at Cougar Lands in Omaha, Nebraska, and we went at e three day and I got I got good.

I did get good.

I haven't been in a long time, so I don't know how often you're bowling.

Maybe your skills are a little sharper than mine.

Speaker 3

He's starting to back.

Speaker 6

But I think I remember Kyle being good.

Speaker 3

Yeah, I'm very good.

Speaker 5

I don't remember you having any discernible talent when it comes to bowling.

Speaker 3

Wow, that's wild, bro, this is big.

Speaker 6

I don't I don't remember that.

Speaker 5

I remember Kyle being good.

I don't remember Blake being good at Wow.

Speaker 4

Blake would plug in, Blake, Blake, Blake can plug in.

I've seen him plug in better than you.

Speaker 2

Thank you, Kyle.

Speaker 7

I remember Kyle doing the where you cradle it with your hand and you spin it thing.

Speaker 4

Yeah, yes, I have a wicked spin.

I do use the thumb.

Speaker 2

Kyle has a crazy style.

Speaker 4

I just used the two middle fingers in the ball.

I don't even have a thumb drilled in the hole because I'm just palming it.

Speaker 2

Oh my god, I thought.

Speaker 3

You didn't even use your fingers at all.

Speaker 4

I thought you just had no because you want to rip up like a fucking buzz saw.

Speaker 3

You know what I mean.

You want to rip it up.

Get that hook on it.

Speaker 2

Oh yes, mommy, big check hands.

Speaker 3

I got a horrible throw.

I throw it backwards.

Are you lefty?

Yeah?

Speaker 2

How heavy.

Was your ball?

Speaker 4

I bowled with a twelve pounder, I think it was.

It was not that heavy, yeah, which is it's very light.

Yeah, but it's because of the effort that I had to get that spin.

Speaker 3

You have to exert a lot of effort and energy.

Speaker 5

See, I haven't.

I don't think I've gone for years.

I used to go.

Speaker 3

I haven't gone for years, donkey.

Speaker 5

For years.

I haven't gone for years.

I bet now I would roll with like a thirty pound ball.

Speaker 3

Dude, you can't, you can't.

It's like, sixteen is the top.

Speaker 2

I think sixteen is the match, bro.

Speaker 3

Yeah, do you live?

Speaker 2

I don't know.

Speaker 3

I would go with like a six pounder.

Probably I do that.

What's the lightest, the lightest you can go?

Yeah, you can go six pounds.

Speaker 5

I feel like nowadays I roll with like a thirty five pound I pounder.

Speaker 2

Okay, I don't wait, wait wait, So we were just talking about how you pivot the sport to like cooler things.

But honestly, like super heavy bowling, I'm kind of in on dude, where oh.

Speaker 3

My god, Oh that is a good idea, Like strong man, that's a good idea, dude.

Speaker 5

I would love to dislocate his shoulder by trying to roll a fifty pound bowling BALLT Yes, what would.

Speaker 2

That do to the pins?

And the pins are heavier too.

Speaker 5

It just disintegrates them if if you hit them with enough forest and blake.

Speaker 3

How do you feel about smaller and smaller golf balls?

Is that cool?

Is that fun?

Speaker 2

That's kind of cool?

Speaker 3

I don't know.

Speaker 7

Well, Hey, how about when you go to a fancy like resort and when you get there, they're like they had the tray with the juices for you and your special person and you drink it and it's so fucking good.

Speaker 2

What is what is this specific place you're talking about here?

Speaker 5

Well, when you go to like a nice hotel or resorts or something.

Speaker 3

Like usually Hawaii like tropical places.

Speaker 2

Yeah, okay, gotcha.

Speaker 3

Yeah.

Speaker 5

I never go with the water though.

I go with the alcohol drink to kind of kick that weekend off.

Speaker 2

Sure, yeah, right when they ask you at the front desk.

Speaker 5

But the issue is they always give you like the like the one that just hits you over the head, the flavor of sensation and they give you to you in like a tiny cup.

Speaker 3

Do you go for the alcohol one?

Speaker 7

Like when you give your luggage to the bellman and they're like, hey, welcome, and there's an alcohol one us like that.

Speaker 3

That's probably where Mexico.

Speaker 5

Yeah, Mexico, Yeah yeah, Mexico.

Speaker 2

Just off to the races in Hawaii.

Speaker 3

I don't remember ever having like an option as far as like.

Speaker 5

Oh that's sad they're blowing it.

Well.

Speaker 7

I want to get like refreshed before I get am I gonna finish that.

Speaker 2

I like to black out as soon as I land.

Yeah, yeah, no, I like to forget my vacation before it starts.

Uh huha, blackout on the plane.

Speaker 5

I know.

Speaker 6

I remember, I remember seeing you at my wedding.

Speaker 5

Uh so Red the.

Speaker 2

Reddest guy that was a major sunburn hell boy over there, Yeah, shows a boy Ron Pearlman brod can we Blake got.

Speaker 6

In the pool and didn't leave for three days straight.

Speaker 2

It's true, man, buckanhell.

I had to fight through your old family.

It was a wrestling match.

We almost got freaking Oh that's the uncles.

Speaker 5

Yeah, my my uncle Matt was fighting everybody and uh he's like a wrestler, and my cousins are wrestlers, and so Blake is drunk and he's thinking like I'm also gonna throw these guys around here.

He comes from wrestling stuff, so he's like, I'm from Iowa, uh, and I thought, and also you're not.

And he fights these guys and the staff was like, comes running down and they're going Pela pelicia, like they're gonna call the cops.

Really, and then yes, and then we had to explain that we're all family and friends.

And then they're based were like, this is a nice place.

Don't fight each other, right, That's how.

Speaker 2

Hard they were dunking me under the water.

I was joke slammed repeatedly by Adam's like sixteen year old nephews.

Speaker 5

I was very surprised about weed because my dad obviously just was dealing with cancer all of last year, and he was like, I just want to see if I could smoke weed.

And then we're like, Dad, you're not gonna be able to smoke weed.

You have fucking lung cancer.

And then the doctor we're all facetiming because of COVID with the doctor.

Speaker 6

My dad's in.

Speaker 5

There holding up the phone doing a piss poor job of it, by the way, and the doctor we were like asking all these questions and then my dad doesn't have one question about his own health, and then at the very end was like I got a question and we're like oh, He's like okay, this should be good.

All right, good, he's invested.

And then he's like, can I smoke weed?

And the doctor was like, yeah, I think that that would be okay because the carcinogyd levels are so low and what we're about to put you through it'll knock that out right away.

Speaker 3

And so uh, it's plant medicine.

Bro.

Speaker 4

There is like there is some studies I believe of it killing cancer and a petri.

Speaker 3

Dish also some studies of killing children science.

Speaker 5

My dad and I would always go fishing at this lake in Omaha when I was growing up, and every once in a while you would hear like but like it's light, and you're like, what the fuck is going on?

Speaker 3

Is your dad ripping bonds?

Don't look at me?

Speaker 5

Fuldiers's canto in here No, And it would be the stealth bomber, just like covering above the lake, like just sort of creep and.

Speaker 3

They can hover.

Wait, these things can hover.

They go, but they can go very slow, like they went very slow over.

Speaker 6

Yeah, they can just.

Speaker 3

So that you can or they can break the sound barrier.

Speaker 5

Yeah, they was like going like mad slow right over us and.

Speaker 6

There's a ton of cool.

Speaker 5

But playing some bombers in Omaha because that's where the president goes, uh when there's a giant emergency, because it's the biggest city, most centrally located in the US.

Speaker 2

Oh that's cool.

Speaker 5

Living America, that's yeah, that's where he went.

Speaker 6

That's where he went during nine to eleven.

Speaker 5

Huh really yeah, ship yeah, madam, Yeah, I'm mad.

Speaker 3

I didn't go anywhere.

I stood my ground on nine eleven.

Speaker 2

But go ahead, damn, yeah you didn't.

Speaker 3

I didn't run from anything.

No, Yeah, you're right, me too.

I still did the paper out.

Speaker 2

I stayed in social studies class.

Speaker 3

I went right to Norwegian class and told everybody in Norwegian the plane had Yeah.

Us history was crazy that day.

Speaker 6

I remember going to school and then they were like, you know, we fucking canceled school today, and I was.

And then I went and smoked weed in my buddy's garage.

For America, it's the whole world gone.

Speaker 3

You lit up your own two towers of weed.

That was necessary.

Speaker 2

Yeah.

That was a wild time, man, And I'll never forget dudes.

Speaker 4

Hey, dudes, can I talk about something absolutely?

Speaker 3

Is it related?

Because no, no, it's not taking.

Speaker 2

We were kind of having a moment of silence, but go ahead.

Speaker 5

In high school, I uh, I did notes and then my girlfriend found them and like flushed them down my toilet and was being so dramatic about the notes I was taking.

Speaker 3

It was so excited.

Speaker 6

That's exactly what it was.

Speaker 5

She say, no, no, on my watch, you're not dyet here.

And meanwhile I had like a notos to get me through like finals week, and I was like, Birch, don't you do that?

Speaker 2

Damn?

Speaker 5

I snapped, dude.

I used to uh do a quite a bit of I wouldn't do a lot of adderall, but I would do it fairly often when I was doing stand up on the road and you just get burnt out, and like right before the show would start, about ten minutes before I would take like I would break it up and do like a fourth and then take that and then that would that would get things, uh turned in.

I don't I haven't done it in years.

Speaker 3

Poor cocaine co cocaine was just expensive.

It had comedians backs for years.

Speaker 6

I know, Yeah, we betrayed.

Speaker 3

It, fancy.

Speaker 5

I'm still gonna send it and murdered it and murdered a handful of people, and then we turned our backs on it.

Hey, let's I'd like to give our flowers to cocaine real quick.

Speaker 2

Sure figure out.

I feel like had a.

Speaker 5

Hell of a run.

Then these new fangled drugs come in and kind of take over.

Speaker 3

They're so new and so fangled, they're so fangled they're illegal.

Speaker 2

Did they prescribe adderall to kids with ADHD yes?

Did it?

It does the opposite for someone with ady D correct me.

Yeah, a smart guy, resident smart guy who can't read well.

Speaker 3

No, it's not that I know this from reading about it.

That they gave me that ship.

In college, my coach was like, your grades are garbage.

Speaker 7

Maybe try some adderall.

And I was like, yeah, all right, And I went to like the team doctor.

Speaker 2

That's awesome.

Speaker 5

You I want to go to that team.

Speaker 7

Doctor licked my ass and then, oh my god, clicked your ass?

Speaker 3

Did you say licked your ass?

He's just checking it out to make sure it worked.

Speaker 4

Wait, okay, okay, continue and.

Speaker 3

Gave me adderall.

I took some and went to class and sat next to this girl on my swim team, and I was just jumping out the gym.

She was like, what is wrong with you?

And I go, I don't know.

I was like doing drawings and be.

Speaker 2

Like was this funny?

And she was like, this is crazy.

I imagine you would have turned into that dude from White Lotus, like the guy who's running the hotel who just starts banging allies.

Speaker 3

Killed it man.

Yeah, yeah, it was crazy.

She was like, what's wrong with you?

Speaker 2

Yeah?

Speaker 5

Is that what you're saying?

You could just see drs turning like super duper gay right away.

Speaker 2

Turning no control on adderall.

Speaker 3

It's just it's the adderall right.

Speaker 5

I don't know if it has anything to do with the adderall.

I can't stop these guys specifically.

Speaker 3

It must be the adderall.

Speaker 5

That's why you can't.

You can't do too much of it because it will like tweak you out, like you have to really start off super duper small.

Speaker 2

No.

Speaker 7

But I but I did one and Blake is right the guy I went to the doctor.

I was like, I went crazy, and he goes, yeah.

Some people have the adverse effect where you like it doesn't even you out.

Speaker 5

Well, if you don't need it, they perscribe that to you, and you didn't need it.

So if you need it, then it calms you down and helps you focus, but if you don't need it, it goes.

Speaker 3

I gave it to homies instantly.

Speaker 7

I was like, this is I'm gonna jump out of a window on this stuff, and they were like, could.

Speaker 3

We have it?

Speaker 8

Oh?

Speaker 4

I used to take that ship all the time when when I was cutting, like cutting sketches and stuff.

I would wake up and just take adderall and then go, you're a cutter.

Yeah, cutting like editing.

Speaker 3

Ain't like that.

No, no, no, no, ain't like that.

But uh yeah, every morning it just fucking cut comedy.

Speaker 5

I'm very glad that it's not, uh that none of us were are like real drug addicts, because like talking just specifically for myself, I'm like, I could have really if this were the eighties, and I've said this before, and like cocaine was everywhere in the comedy clubs, I would have been a full.

Speaker 6

Blown cocaine without a down.

Speaker 5

Yeah, and uh, I'm glad that I didn't come up in the in the early mid eighties.

It's where people would get paid in cocaine.

Speaker 3

But at the same time, way more fun.

Speaker 5

Yeah, that probably would have been way over.

Speaker 4

Is that what it was like, it was just floating around.

People actually got paid in coke.

Speaker 6

Yeah, that's like the stories.

Speaker 3

Yeah, that was the whole.

Like you go to a party and there'd be like a giant coke.

Speaker 7

Tray going around like a butler carrying it, and shit, can you imagine?

Speaker 3

Wow?

Incredible?

Wow wow wow.

So on the last.

Speaker 5

Podcast, we're talking about how easy it would be to get meth at a truck stop.

Speaker 3

We did care.

Speaker 5

How easy would it be to get mushrooms at all?

Speaker 2

Oh so easy?

Very absolutely.

I would even say it might be easier to get meth at a bowling alley than at a.

Speaker 8

Truth Do you know, actually, do you know where the place is to get mushrooms?

Where it's at the where they tell you how heavy the ball is?

The way station at the bowling alley?

Speaker 3

The pro Shop?

Are you talking about the pro Shop?

Speaker 2

Are you talking about the pro Shop?

Bro?

Speaker 3

What do you want to know about the pro Shop?

Speaker 6

Having a laugh, he's pulling a yes, mommy, because.

Speaker 2

They do weigh your ball at the pro Shop.

Speaker 3

Okay, waiting something.

Speaker 7

They're weighing something they gotta wait for.

They got to scale for something.

Speaker 4

That's where they drill your ball if you could also get your name engraved in the ball, and you can get them to say whatever you want.

Speaker 3

That's the fun part about on a ball.

Speaker 2

Twizzlers are the fucking worst folk Twizzler.

I hate Twizzler.

All my homies Twizzler, do you hate?

Speaker 6

I always gotta grab one, though, I don't hate Twizzler.

Speaker 3

Yeah, but are they still on the shelves.

Speaker 2

They are on the shoves.

You don't hate Twizzlers.

Speaker 3

No, okay, they're on the shelves.

There's a fucking market.

There's a market.

Speaker 5

You said, all my homies hate Twizzler.

I do believe that we're friends, and I like Twizzler.

I'm aw I've come from a Twizzler family.

Speaker 6

Red Vines whoop They don't.

Speaker 2

But you do agree red Vines whooped the ship out of Twizzlers.

Speaker 3

They're not as slime.

Speaker 5

Absolutely don't.

Speaker 2

Oh my god, Wait, Adam said, absolutely, don't.

Speaker 5

Correct don't.

Speaker 3

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I just wanted to make sure we got that across.

Speaker 6

So you're a Twizzler man, Yeah, I like Twizzlers better than Redvine.

Speaker 3

So you might like my drink.

Speaker 2

You might like I don't like.

Speaker 5

Black liquors, though, Twizzlers aren't black liquorice.

They had the classic twizz.

Speaker 7

Dude, you know what red vines have like a weird cult following where people are like, you're either on the inside or you're not, And I'm like, funk off.

Speaker 3

They're gross.

They're all gross.

Speaker 6

They're like a little waxy.

Speaker 2

When they're soft and fresh, Oh my god, they're.

Speaker 3

Right straight themselves and fresh straight out the tub.

Speaker 4

You get the plastic tub and you put that in the first couple out of there, they're warm and nice and wonderful.

Speaker 6

The last warm they didn't come from the oven.

Speaker 2

Well, he's been sitting on them.

Speaker 3

Pliable.

Speaker 2

Yeah, we're sitting on him in the car, brush.

Speaker 7

Off the truck driving cross country from the laboratory.

Speaker 3

They're made in pliable because by the end, their heart is a rock.

This is the way.

Speaker 2

Well, you want to know the real game changer, No, you want to know the real licorice game changer?

Speaker 7

I guess what Australian black licorice, mate, That's what I'm saying, May what is.

Speaker 2

That Australian liqoric it's.

Speaker 4

Really good, Australian black liquorice?

Speaker 3

What is this?

Speaker 2

Both all the liquorishes if it's Australian.

That ship is so straight up fire thundercat it is delicioso.

Remember when we had that, like cool?

Was it just a lunch meeting with with Cheech and he gave us like a trust Chong.

No, it was definitely cheap.

No, it was chea definitely cheap.

Speaker 3

It was cheat blakes right.

Speaker 5

I never met with Cheech Mari and I met with Tommy Chong.

That's the only person I've ever met with.

Speaker 2

Oh, we went to lunch with Cheach and he got malibu, right mm hmm yeah, and he said.

Speaker 3

That was how you get rich.

Guys.

Speaker 6

I was not there.

Speaker 2

Oh dude, you missed out.

He was a really freaking cool dude.

Speaker 3

It was awesome.

Speaker 2

What a legend.

But he was saying the most fucked up he ever got on an edible was off of some weed back Leva, because I think it was like weed infused honey and just like layers upon layers of it, and it just sounded like a quite the quite the magical trip.

Speaker 5

Quite the event.

Speaker 4

Honey in your tea is great for the winter.

That actually reminds me, it makes me want to get some THHC.

Speaker 3

Honey.

Let's not talk about Cheach or chong because everyone we talk about dies.

Speaker 5

Yeah, that's true, So moving don't don't talk about people that we like.

Speaker 2

Boy, good call erase that scratch that.

Speaker 3

Can we please fucking play some pickleball?

Okay?

Speaker 2

Oh yeah, bitch, Okay, he's back everybody.

Speaker 6

He's into the pickleball.

Speaker 4

The last time I talked about it, I said I was thinking about getting into it, and now I have.

Speaker 6

You thought about it?

Speaker 2

It's official, and now I.

Speaker 3

Thought about it.

I'm in it.

Now I'm playing it.

Speaker 4

Now I'm playing pickleball, and I'm playing it as much as I can.

And I fucking love the game.

Okay, and I want to play with you guys.

Speaker 6

Are you dropping LB's playing pickleball?

Speaker 3

Um?

Yeah?

Yeah?

Speaker 6

Is it an exercise thing or is just a fun thing?

Speaker 3

It's both.

It's both.

I like to have both, you know, and one and it's it's.

Speaker 6

Great as you should.

Speaker 4

It's great cardio, great back and forth, good hand eye coordination, and just a lot of fun with friends.

Speaker 3

And that's why I think we should do it together.

Okay, are you down?

Speaker 2

I love?

Speaker 3

Yeah, you find a cord, I'll be there.

Speaker 2

How competitive does it get?

Kyle like?

Are you like challenge?

Are you playing against some young gohrd some vets.

Are you like learning with people?

Speaker 3

Like?

Speaker 2

What can we expect here?

Speaker 4

I've been learning with people for the past like four months and just playing with friends, but the games get pretty heeded.

Speaker 3

What does that mean you've been learning with people?

Speaker 4

Well, we've been playing, like learning the rules.

Like you know, there's certain ways you have to serve in certain I guess I'm wondering.

Speaker 3

I'm asking, like, who are you playing with?

Speaker 4

No, I was playing with the producers on Shadows.

We would sneak away and that's how we got it out of our system, is we would go and just play fucking pickleball and watch the Q take.

Speaker 3

So let me get this straight.

Don't walk it back.

You were you were, so don't walk it back.

I said it was scheduled.

Speaker 4

You were so busy schedule podcasts, and well this was Monday through Friday.

Speaker 3

Who was instead you were playing pickleball?

And now and now you want to come back and play us in pickleball?

Speaker 5

Yeah, okay, correct, after you decided not to do the podcast for a few weeks, obviously spent sell yes, so then you could come and lowered your pickleball supremacy over us.

Speaker 6

We obviously aren't.

Speaker 5

Going to be as good, even though the three of us were all physically and athletically more gifted than you.

Speaker 3

Yes, I gotta jump on it.

Speaker 2

Yeah, so you're saying.

Speaker 5

You put a pause on the podcast so you could get a leg up on us.

Speaker 3

Honestly, if you had just told me, guys, I'm I'm gonna play pickleball instead of the podcast, I would have said, salute respect, go do your thing.

Oh but the fact that I'm finding out about it now, yeah, yeah, that's right.

Speaker 4

But god damn, you guys really put me in a corner on that one.

Speaker 2

Oh, you yourself in the corner.

Speaker 3

I can't wait to play you now.

I'm gonna be hitting you with a drop.

Speaker 5

I remember, I remember when we were talking about nine to eleven, trying to have a moment.

Speaker 3

On this podcast that we've had to recreate with.

Speaker 5

You trying to have a moment about nine to eleven, You said, hey, can I say something real quick?

Speaker 6

And then you outed yourself.

Speaker 3

Yeah yeah, and.

Speaker 6

Playing pickleball.

And that's why you left the podcast just to get better at pickleball.

Speaker 2

You got a point in time, we're allowed to drop off the pod to get better at a skill, at a skill.

Speaker 3

At a reindeer game.

It can't be anything real.

It's gotta be a reindeer game.

Speaker 2

I want to get good at drone racing.

Speaker 3

I love that.

That's the thing about pickleball.

It's a budding fucking sport.

There's a pro circuit.

You know what else is a budding sport?

Ultimate frisbee and it just never will be.

And what's the other one where you slam the ball off the little net?

Speaker 2

Oh?

Yeah, that's the beach game.

That game looks cool as fu.

By the way, there's a college scene.

Speaker 6

It's smash ball.

It's it is it smash It is smash ball.

Speaker 2

Yeah, yes, smash ball.

Speaker 6

I live on the beach.

It's smash ball.

Speaker 2

I see it.

Speaker 3

That's the thing, bro.

Speaker 4

They have pickleball tournaments down in Newport, and I'm like, okay, I'm gonna start signing up for fucking tournaments soon and traveling and trying to win because I'm trying to get fucking prone.

Speaker 2

Know how much do you need to prepare for the tournament?

Speaker 3

Because I can't even believe you're here?

Yeah?

Speaker 5

Wait, do you got to take six months off the podcast so you could go train for this tournament.

Speaker 3

Or gonna I mean maybe, but hopefully not perfect.

Speaker 7

Earlier we touched on something and I'm kind of I'm kind of scared to do this because it's a flower situation.

Speaker 3

People keep dying that we talk about.

Speaker 5

Yes, well specifically that you talk about.

I feel like you are the one that brings it up and then they die right away, So it might be, Yeah, do you want me to bring up the jerky boys?

Speaker 3

Go for oh, the jerky Boys?

Speaker 7

Okay, yeah, how funny were the jerky boys take?

Speaker 2

They're very good?

Do you want to give them their flowers?

Are you gonna give them a kiss of death or what?

Speaker 3

I don't know what I'm gonna give them, but don't give them COVID fucking shit.

Speaker 7

When I think I was at summer camp and somebody had the tape and they played it and we would just be in the bunks like before night or whatever.

Speaker 2

Oh dude, and just losing our.

Speaker 3

Minds listening to these prank calls.

Speaker 2

Oh yeah, dude, have you got speaking of prink calls?

Because that is a lost art.

Speaker 3

Nobody else, nobody else, No jerky.

Speaker 2

Boys rule now, super funny.

Speaker 6

I never really listened to Jerky.

Speaker 2

Boys to it.

Speaker 3

It is fucking unbelievable.

If you're eleven or ten, it's twice as good.

Speaker 2

I want to put you on another one.

Longmont potion Castle.

Have you ever listened to his print calls?

They are my boys, skinner, Put me on him.

He's it's so funny, dude, just like hilarious.

Speaker 3

Say those words again, long.

Speaker 2

Mont potion Castle.

It's like kind of an underground.

Speaker 5

And it rolls off the tongue.

Speaker 2

Long or long long like big dick Daddy long long month.

Speaker 6

Like not short, but long l O N G m O n T.

Speaker 7

Potion Castle, long Mont Like that's probably a street name or of place or something.

Potion Castle.

Speaker 2

The dude's super like mysterious.

Nobody knows who he is.

He's been doing it forever.

There it's so funny, and it's prank phone call, prank phone calls.

Speaker 5

Hell walk Well, you're not you're not explaining it that well, just saying it's so funny.

Speaker 2

Like what is it?

Just you gotta go in?

Speaker 5

So why is it so funny?

Speaker 2

Blake?

He just fucks with people so hard.

It's a lost art.

It is like prank calling was so fun Kyle, you were really good at it.

Speaker 4

Yeah, I mean I I would jump in.

Of course, Bro, I'm game for just about fucking anything.

Speaker 3

Dog.

You know what, Well, we're specifically talking about prank phone.

Speaker 4

Calling, but I'm trying to remember, like what were my good ones?

What would I remember calling on the radio?

Speaker 3

Like radio?

And I would be like, what about a bungee jumping?

Speaker 2

The best one?

Speaker 8

That?

Speaker 3

It's a hole in my memory?

What are you talking about?

Speaker 2

The best one that Kyle ever did that I remember very well is you called a Chinese food restaurant and you said that he found a contact in your soup.

No, you said you found a cunt hare in your soup, and they thought you were saying contact, And it was just a who's on first of you and this poor person working at the Chinese restaurant going contact in your suit and You're like, no, conta hare contair in my like nobody wears contacts, nobody wears contacts.

And it just really got nowhere, and I think you eventually are like, I gotta go, dude.

But I remember we were just young kids, like on at John Paul's house and I'm just crying, laughing because we have him on speakerphone.

I'm just crying.

I'm like, Kyle right here.

Speaker 3

It was after that that I said, I will follow this man anywhere.

Speaker 5

Here's a dark secret.

It's not the same.

I guess it's not the same.

I went to I feel, to me, roller rinks are similar vibes as bowling out.

Speaker 6

Yes, yes, I agree, but it's just it just skews younger.

Speaker 3

As cosmic bowllying.

Speaker 6

Yeah, no, that's bowling Alley's in general.

Speaker 4

Well, they have dance like roller rinks have like dancing disco balls and stuff.

Speaker 2

They have the same carpets, they play the same This sort of smells the same, and you're.

Speaker 3

Oh, you know what it is.

They play the hockey pokes.

Speaker 2

Snack shacks, serves the same stuff.

Speaker 3

You know what it is.

It's because you're renting shoes.

Speaker 5

Yeah, maybe that's because in both.

Speaker 3

Places shoes are being rented.

Speaker 4

So there's tons of fucking shoes off smell and there's wood floors.

Speaker 5

So at ours in Omaha, Nebraska, there was we had skate land and then they had like this crazy huge pladaisium right.

Speaker 3

With like now what is that step up?

Speaker 5

Like uh, you know like at McDonald's where they have the ballpit like a discovery zone exactly like a discovery ez shout and that was the first time I ever finger banged a human woman.

Speaker 3

Oh what dude, Yeah, that was the spot.

Speaker 6

Yeah, in the pladisium.

Damn son, where'd you find that?

Speaker 5

It was her idea.

Speaker 6

She was like, let's climb up in the pladisium.

Speaker 5

And I'm like, oh, this is crazy.

Speaker 3

A human woman, a human woman?

Speaker 4

Do you want to step out the adjective human is just why did you?

Was there a?

Speaker 2

Okay?

Speaker 3

They not Sometimes they smell of that bat gets you reved up to.

Speaker 5

The jungle and concre Yeah, and then and then I remember not even I don't even know if like there was an insertion.

I think it was just like I just kind of patted the outside.

Speaker 6

Yeah, it was.

Speaker 5

Just I just didn't know what I was doing.

I was just flipping and flapping.

Speaker 2

The grim details of like your first time finger bangings a woman is it's hard.

It's hard to find the right.

Speaker 5

Dude, no idea.

I didn't even know that there was an inside.

Speaker 3

I mean, neither of you know.

Speaker 2

No, it was so hard even.

Speaker 5

Actually I must have known that, but in the moment, my heart was racing way too hard.

Yeah, just so nervous.

Speaker 6

But where mine was in a in a tube of a plataisium?

Where was yours?

Speaker 2

Blaky back of a car?

Yeah?

Parked classic?

Speaker 3

What kind of car?

Speaker 2

Yeah?

Speaker 5

The way you guys climbed in the back, there was not a lot of climbing in the back for me, it was it was a lot of front seats.

Speaker 2

Yeah, I think there was.

Like I was at a house party and then like the place where we could go to be alone was the car?

Speaker 3

Sure, hey, you want to go see my car?

The way?

Speaker 6

Was that your move?

Speaker 2

Kick all the taco bell out of the way right fourth mile?

Speaker 5

Did you go?

Speaker 8

Like?

Speaker 5

Hey, uh, I got the sweet backseat of my car?

Speaker 6

Or it was just sort of imploid.

Speaker 2

It wasn't my car.

I couldn't drive.

Kyle probably drove me to the party?

Speaker 3

Was my car?

Speaker 6

So it was the backseat of Kyle's car?

Speaker 3

Which car?

Bro Kyle's car?

Speaker 2

Either?

No?

Speaker 3

What car?

What car did you do this?

Then?

Speaker 5

Huh?

Speaker 2

I think it was her car?

Speaker 3

Which one of my cars?

Did you do this in?

Speaker 5

Okay, you dirty dog?

Speaker 2

It might have been your car?

Speaker 4

Was it the eighty nine Honda a Cord the eighty six Pulsar?

Speaker 6

All right, we got a car.

We gotta Playdasium.

Speaker 4

Kyle, I plead the fifth on this one.

I think I know, well, you know where it is.

No, because mine's in the car too, is the saint?

I said that it was in the back of the van.

It was in the back of the fucking van.

Speaker 5

We don't plead the fifth, just we don't need to know the girl's name.

Speaker 3

By the way, I plead the fifth.

It was a van.

Speaker 5

Okay, I know, Workaholics main characters ranked by intelligence?

Speaker 2

Yes, yes, a hot take, good luck.

Speaker 5

So it says it does say that Carl is the dumbest, which I kind of I don't know if I would agree with it.

Speaker 3

So, but let's Seeah, he's the human genius and they didn't mention that once.

Speaker 2

Does it say that?

Is that the rank or did they just start listing characters?

Wait, it says that Carl's the No, no, no, it starts with the dumbest.

Speaker 4

First mission accomplished, baby fucking mission accomplished, Dougie, Right, how could.

Speaker 2

They say the human genius, this is the dumbest character.

Speaker 5

It's iron Hey, I don't know, he says.

However, he proves to be one of the show's least intelligent characters.

When these schemes don't work out, okay.

From his burrito restaurant to the various functionalities of his van, Carl's foolish ideas often underscore his lack of wits.

You know what, screen rant, Alex Genteel, fuck you.

Speaker 3

Okay, send him a case of blueberry.

Speaker 2

Carl is a future thinker.

He might not seem smart in today, but he's thinking so many steps ahead that you don't even know what he's saying is intelligent.

He says ice currency of the future.

He actually has a freaking point, all right, doesn't That.

Speaker 3

Was the start of cryptocurrency.

I know.

Speaker 4

I was like, where are you gonna h No, Ice currency of the future is just the start.

Speaker 2

We won't have ice anymore, and we're gonna be paying for ice.

It's the start that will be our point.

Speaker 4

We can't make it in refrigerators because electricity will also go right.

Speaker 3

It's just me Australian.

Speaker 4

Have you guys noticed this when you go to the airports and stuff, The international currency exchange acronym is ice and a global currency is where we're headed.

So ice actually is the currency of the future.

Speaker 6

Oh my god, wow, Alex, you got that wrong.

Speaker 5

Yeah, it's been a long time since I've gotten like a blue literated on weed like I've been.

I've been so like now I know the amount that I like to smoke, uh and just feel good.

Yes, But it's been a long time since I've been like around a group and instead of like going like, hey, we're gonna have some drinks, we'll smoke a little bit of weed.

We'll do this.

It's been a long time since I've been like, all right, we're gonna hot box this tent or whatever stone.

Yeah, we're gonna wear this gas mask and get fucked up.

Speaker 4

I do remember Blake a little bit, like when we would go down the phone line and or the phone book and.

Speaker 3

Call actual people.

Speaker 4

That was not as satisfying as calling establishments like established.

Speaker 2

I've gotten a lot of trouble from that.

Speaker 3

Do you remember what happened?

Speaker 2

We were like hammered.

I should have got one.

We were like hammered in like the driveway, just drinking little cornitas or whatever those little coronas are were Mickey grenades, and we were like just doing random ass phone numbers.

And I got this lady to pick up and it was late, it was like one o'clock or whatever, and she picks up, and I was just kind of like, Mom, I'm I'm in jail.

The worst thing you can do, like real jail, I'm in jail.

And then like she's just kind of like.

Speaker 3

What a young child in jail?

Speaker 2

The best She's just like Jason, Jason is that you?

Speaker 3

And I'm like I have to go.

Speaker 2

And then I hung up, and of course she calls that.

Speaker 5

You do a little girl's voice, and then the mom is like, Jason.

Speaker 2

Is that you?

Speaker 3

He was young?

He was young, Blake was late to puberty.

Speaker 2

Well, whatever it was, I must have nailed it because she kept calling, waiting for it.

I must have nailed it because she kept calling back, back back back.

I feel so bad until the next morning, I kind of had forgotten about it, and I was like just about to get in the shower and the phone rings and I pick it up and it's her and she's like who is this.

I'm like I I'm like, oh shit, oh shit.

I couldn't think fast enough.

And I was like I was like Blaine and she's like Blaine what And I'm like Andy, So.

Speaker 3

Yeah, this is what comes from?

Speaker 2

Why does she say?

She said?

Speaker 5

Blaine?

Speaker 2

Andy?

So I want you to know that I've I've alerted the authorities.

They have your phone number, and I was like, oh god, I can't believe the fucking name.

I came up with Blaine Andy, so but I was so scared.

Speaker 5

And then they go, well, Blake Anderson lives there.

Do we think that has any correlation.

Speaker 3

With somebody at just watched tackers like they can change these things.

Now, it could be calling from anywhere.

Speaker 6

And then the cops are like, now let's go get some snacks.

Speaker 2

Dude.

I was so terrified.

I felt so bad.

It's like, looking back, that was really a mean thing to do.

The sun must not have been home.

Speaker 3

Right, it must he was in jail.

You might have hit it right on the head.

Speaker 2

Bro, yeahs.

Speaker 5

Run away.

Speaker 2

This might not have been your first, but you didn't.

You have a really legendary one on a ski lift.

Speaker 10

Bro, you're here, that's legendary.

I'm still gonna send Blake is like my fucking historian, due my hero.

Speaker 5

A legendary fingerbang is the funniest thing.

Speaker 3

Also like the worst, Like then you're going back in a glove.

Speaker 6

Yeah, so cold.

Speaker 4

No, I feel like I know you're totally right, absolutely, because it was like you're alone and you can fucking like you're alone the whole way up there and you can get some ship done.

Speaker 5

Yeah, but also like it's a weird spot for like your wrist, it's uncomfortable for her.

Speaker 6

It's cold for sure.

Speaker 3

Can you imagine if I would have just fell like reaching around?

Speaker 5

Amazing, the funniest way to be paralyzed.

Speaker 6

Yes, yes, money, let's.

Speaker 3

Go, or you're just dangling by it?

Speaker 6

Kyle, Oh my god, how how did this happen?

Speaker 2

You can't walk any locker?

Speaker 5

How did this happen?

Speaker 2

Well, well, still gonna send it.

Man, dude the ski lift jersey, what you.

Speaker 3

Got, I'll tell you real quick.

But if you did fall and then you just had to kind of clinch to dangle from yeah, not good.

Oh man?

Speaker 7

Yea, this was an inn a basement.

This girl who didn't go to our school's basement.

She had a sauna in her basement.

Speaker 5

Oh wait, so this was that's that's even cooler.

Wait a minute, a girl that did not go to your school.

Yeah, that's fucking so gangster dude.

Speaker 3

Had like a big house.

Speaker 7

So we're like, let's roll over to this rich girl's house.

Damn, she had a sauna in the basement.

Speaker 2

Hot, hot, hot hot.

Speaker 6

I didn't even know such well.

Speaker 3

Things it was off, the sauna was off.

Speaker 2

That's got dangerous as well.

It feels like all of our finger banging situations were kind of a final destination.

Speaker 3

Somebody.

Speaker 7

Yeah, so that's it all right, cool, let's awkwardly go back to the group of people.

Speaker 5

Well we got we got interrupted multiple times in the Plada Asia.

It'd be like, sure, literal children are coming in, or.

Speaker 2

Like the dad's in the knee path.

We're not kids.

Speaker 5

We were like, I don't know, must have been fourteen or fifteen.

Uh so we weren't like true children.

I mean we were children, but we weren't like little nine year olds like kids were just like swinging in being like can I more like tubes closed?

Speaker 2

Get out of here?

Some kids shot in the ball pitch.

Speaker 7

Have I told you I've had the exact same experience at him what?

Speaker 5

Yeah, I feel like we have talked about this week.

Speaker 7

Mine was like a high school like ironic lock in.

Everybody was on certain teams that involved water.

Speaker 2

Uh oh, okay, okay, swimming next edition.

Speaker 5

Okay, So.

Speaker 3

Well wait, what are we hiding here?

Speaker 7

It was wild, wild times, So what is it?

What is it about the discovery zone kind of thing.

Speaker 2

That's it.

Never let your kids go to the ballpit in McDonald Fuck.

Speaker 3

Well, it's like your first it's your first freedom.

You're like out of the site, you're hidden.

Speaker 5

Yes, it's the first time that you could be like remember when you your mom would let you like go in the McDonald's play Daisium and you climb up there and you're like, I'm all alone right now.

Just sit in the tube like I'm just in the tube.

Speaker 4

Like they're like, chuck e cheese behind the fucking don't suck anyone's What are you saying.

Speaker 6

Like I'll suck anything in here?

Speaker 9

I don't know, Yes, mummy, Wait so the d Z or the McDonald's McDonald's play Daisy, but I guess we're calling it is like the og truck stop.

Speaker 7

You just go in there and you kind of like wait and someone comes in and you're like, okay, let's do this.

Speaker 5

Yeah, it's the child's glory hole.

Yeah, it's it's a child hood's truck stop.

A childhood Uh, that's that's our version of the truck stop.

Speaker 2

Let go.

Speaker 5

Durs are you ever since you've been a swimmer for so for so long.

Are you ever like you're meeting a group of people and you're in your speedo.

Are you ever like a little embarrassed by the size of your cock in your speedo?

Speaker 6

Or Adam, are you ever like Adam, Adam, I should juice it up?

Speaker 3

Or adam?

Ye know, stop what this is making me uncomfortable.

Speaker 7

I feel like, as long as you have it in the right position, you're okay.

Speaker 5

You know it's the positioning.

Speaker 7

Yeah, if you have it like, it'll never get too small.

There's some positions where like the speedo kind of will press it down and back into your body.

Speaker 5

It's going inside and then it's just like one little yea, one little nub.

Speaker 3

Cut to commercials, cut to commercials.

In high school, I was a true psychopath and I just remember this the other day.

Speaker 5

You used to juice yourself up.

Oh god, what now crank down in the pool?

Speaker 3

No, no, But so so there's a speedo that's like

Speaker 2

No?

Speaker 3

tight on you right, called a drag suit.

Do you guys know what a dragsuit is?

Speaker 4

Of course, I know what a dragsuit is.

So loosers beto that goes on top of the speed.

Speaker 7

It's like a looser speedo it's all like a box cut.

It's more like a box cut.

Speaker 5

I didn't did not know this.

Speaker 2

And it's like board shorts.

Speaker 3

No no, no, no no.

It's like a speedo on top of a speedo, but it's looser.

I'm sorry why, yeah, but it's like it's like a baggy speed Oh.

Speaker 7

Just so like when you are racing and you lose the drag suit, you feel much faster, right, because it's not like it's holding your bag.

Speaker 3

Yeah, exactly so, because at some point in high school I just started only wearing the drag suit without the speedo underneath.

Speaker 5

Because because your cock looked better just in the dragscial.

Speaker 3

I don't even I don't think it looked better.

It's just it was like kind of fun to swim because then it would just kind of like be loose and wagging.

Speaker 5

Right, Oh, so your dick would wag and like the commercial.

Speaker 3

Well yeah, it was just kind of like fun.

You felt you were swimming naked, but then when you get out of the pool, you just had your dick.

Speaker 7

Like fully kind of saran wrapped, like Harrison Ford and the Cryo whatever the fuck it was, the carbon Nite carbon My dick was just like hands up, like, and I didn't realize it until just the other day.

I was like, that was probably not okay or like just weird for everybody around.

Speaker 3

Yeah, no, we're all getting a little weirded out about this one.

You guys are just it's okay.

Speaker 4

You can get fucking stoned, and especially work in this business.

You can get stoned all day, every day and still be okay.

You mean medicated, yeah, stone, plant medicine whatever, you know.

Speaker 5

Yeah, I can't though, because I can't act when I'm really high, because I get two in my head.

Speaker 2

Yeah.

Speaker 4

Acting is definitely different than sitting at the monitors watching future television or watching future movies.

Sure, absolutely, that's easy.

It's good for me to do that because I don't.

Speaker 7

Get your sentence have never been said, you got you like smoking weed on set sometimes because acting is different than watching future television, Well it is.

Speaker 3

I mean a man is back.

I don't know.

Speaker 4

I don't act enough to know if I would be okay while super stone, but I would definitely try.

Speaker 2

That's true.

Speaker 5

Well, my I you know, I've tried it a few times, and I when I watched the performance back, I'm like, oh, I'm too.

I could tell that I'm high, and it's it's it makes the performance a little wonky at least for me.

But I mean I've did it, like when I was first starting out doing stand up, and then I've never done it again just because I was like, I know a lot of comics that do get high before shows and they love it.

Speaker 4

Right, I think that would flip me the fuck out, bro, I think I would tweak.

Speaker 5

I was like, Okay, maybe I'll try that.

And so it's like when I was like open my key.

It was like six months into doing stand up when I'm like, you know, twenty years older, nineteen, and uh, I was like my whole shit changed, Like I'm pretty high energy, especially when I'm on stage, and uh really and suddenly I was just.

Speaker 7

Even when I'm on stage, yeah, even especially when you're onstage right right, but no, even I gotta go on stage to relax.

Speaker 4

You're the fastest, You're the fastest mouth in the West on stage, Bro.

Speaker 5

I'm shooting baby, and uh yeah, I was just like slow mo up there, and I didn't I didn't like it.

Speaker 6

The thoughts weren't coming fast.

Speaker 3

Were you slow mo?

Do you think you seem slow mo?

Or do you think you just felt slow mo.

Speaker 6

My friends in the back of the club were.

Speaker 3

Like, hey, you seem really slow mo.

You were vibra.

Speaker 6

Yeah.

Speaker 5

Well they knew that I had smoked with them and so they knew that I was trying this for the first time, and they were like, yeah, maybe that's not your thing.

Yeah, maybe you shouldn't get high right before, Doug Benson, you're not because I think if your delivery is really slow and you and the way you tell stories is really slow and deliberate, when when my shit is is coming at you pretty rapid fly.

Speaker 3

Ya, Yeah it's quick.

Speaker 2

Yeah, you're not really getting dug with high man and we not everybody can.

Speaker 6

That is true.

Speaker 5

I remember specifically one time, me and my buddy Zach, we were in high school and my sister was in middle school and our middle school.

You guys have been in my house.

It's like right in my backyard.

The middle school's right there, like you could throw and so we had some like rockets and we like shot them off and they're like at recess, and we shot them off and they exploded.

Speaker 6

Over the kid's head.

Uh, and we thought it was hilarious.

Speaker 5

We were stoned, and then we bailed and went back to school, and uh, my sister calls me.

We go back in the house and I just hear the phones ringing and ringing and ringing, and it's a she's leaving a message on the voice recorder and she goes, had them.

Oh my god, Oh my god, had him.

Speaker 3

I can't believe who's that?

That was you?

Right, you gotta get out of there.

Speaker 5

The police are gonna come and hit some kid in the chest on the face in their chest is O burt.

Speaker 3

Oh my god, why are you admitting this?

Speaker 5

And I'm like, oh, I'm like, oh, Zach, I think we mutilated a child.

And and then we bail, and uh.

I spend the rest of the day at school thinking that I mutilated a child.

And then I come home and my dad was like, Adam, can I talk to you?

Speaker 6

And I'm like, what's that?

Speaker 5

And then he's like, uh, I was handcuffed in our backyard this afternoon, and I go, wait what He came home and then like winter to go pick up dog shit in the backyard and two cops like flopped out of a bush and handcuffed him.

Speaker 3

Wait, this wasn't a Brittany and Dennis Prank phone call to you.

No, no, no, no, that's what I thought.

I thought this was a fucking twist.

Speaker 5

And he goes, I was handcuffed, and I'm like, shit, I'm I'm so sorry.

I can't believe that it happened.

We didn't think anyone was going to get hit.

And then Brittany and Dad go, we got you, motherfucker.

Speaker 4

Okay, well they got the cops in on it too, pulled the rug out or no, he just he just made up that.

Speaker 3

He just made it up.

There's no cops, No, there was, there was cops.

Speaker 2

Wait what cops came?

They did.

Speaker 5

They didn't handcuff him, arrest him, but cops came because we did shoot rockets off at their So they called the police and were like, some kids are shooting rockets at these children, which, in hindsight, you know, bad call.

Speaker 3

Yeah right, not a good look.

That's a good take back for later.

Anyway, go ahead.

Speaker 2

True, I'm sorry, mama.

Speaker 3

Real quick.

Watching Hitchcock the other night and you brought up bread obviously, I just want to bring this up.

This movie I was watching from was from like nineteen thirty five.

Speaker 2

Okay, yeah, he wasn't watching that the other night.

Speaker 7

And they go to the back to the dude's apartment afterwards, and she's like, you got any food?

And he throws He's like, how's herring?

And she goes, yeah, okay, great.

So he throws a full herring onto like the skillet for like after bar food, and I'm just.

Speaker 2

Like, that's a fish?

Speaker 1

What?

Speaker 3

Yeah?

Speaker 7

Like times have changed?

And then he pulls out He's like, you want some bread?

Wait, hang on, he goes want some bread?

Speaker 3

She goes, yeah, sure.

He pulls out a loaf.

Speaker 7

Of bread that's not sliced like a full like it looks like wonderbread, and then starts slicing slices and I'm like, well, when did slice I'd come out because the saying like best things and slice.

Speaker 3

Bread, wasn't that?

Speaker 4

The whole thing about Betty White is that she was Yes, she was older, was.

Speaker 3

Born before Yeah, then sliced rice spread yep.

So yes, so it's after her birthday.

Speaker 5

Crazy to me that it took that long to just have someone be like, what if we cut it and then put it in the I mean.

Speaker 3

But that's there's so many things all the time that are like that.

Speaker 5

I know.

It makes you go like how what what sweet?

Ass investment do we or invention?

Do we get on heavy bowling?

Wait wait wait old power bowling?

What crypto bowling bowling in the metaverse?

But cosmically what did you just.

Speaker 3

Walk that back?

Yes, but if you don't go forward, you just walk that back, and let's walk it back, okay, far back in because.

Speaker 4

I feel like I might buy unsliced bread so that I can choose how thick my slice is gonna be.

Speaker 3

You know what I mean?

I feel like that.

Speaker 5

I don't know if you can find see now you have that privilege, goodbye, that might be refreshing.

Now you have that privilege, that might be refresher.

Speaker 2

Just tak your own bread texas thin cut after you're buying bread, just to cut it.

Speaker 5

I could see Kyle being the type of guy that went through his baking his own bread.

Speaker 2

Face Yeah, no, which is dope.

Speaker 5

Did you ever go through a baking of your own bread?

Speaker 2

Face?

Speaker 3

Oh yeah, we baked it the coolest, Yeah we did it.

Speaker 2

Yeah, that's dope.

But buying wonder bread, that's unslice.

I don't know.

I don't know what you're getting at there.

You just want to cut the bread.

Speaker 5

I thought it was clear I had to wear a onesie for Mike and Dave need wedding dates.

And I remember, like, what.

Speaker 3

Do you mean onesie like a wrestling singlet?

Speaker 6

Like a wrestling singlet?

Speaker 2

Sure?

Speaker 5

And I remember just like when I talk to the side, because I was like, I don't want to cut, and so I'm like pulling it to the side and it looked obscene like Zach Zach wore another pair to like press everything down.

It's like you should just wear another so you don't really notice it.

And I'm like, I'm like, well, then I don't look like I don't have a cock.

Sure, So then so then I'm pulling it.

Speaker 3

You can't say that.

I think everyone assumes you do have one.

Speaker 5

Yeah, no, I don't know.

Speaker 7

The thing is, as long as you don't have twin spell and definition, you're okay.

Speaker 2

Yes, I covered this in the Ridgecrest on a ridge line.

On the Ridge Line, I told you guys when I was Halloween shopping to be Spider Man.

It was a real big because I have a very pronounced ridge.

Speaker 3

That's right, yes, the Ridge Crest.

Speaker 2

And it's not easy having a you know, a protruding helmet like that can't really cause a lot.

Speaker 3

Do you think you if you fell off a building naked, do you think you could catch the edge with your dick and save your life?

Speaker 2

Here's the deal.

If I could somehow detach my dick and throw it, it could be used as a grappling hook.

Speaker 3

Is a grappling cock?

Speaker 2

Yeah?

I have a harpoon cock.

Yeah, it's a real hook at the end.

Speaker 3

Oh it's pointy, hey, point listeners.

Just when you thought we weren't going to talk about our dicks.

Speaker 4

Today, A commercial cuts a commercial cuts a commercial.

Speaker 3

This is too much.

This is making me sicked out.

Speaker 4

I'm getting sicked out, so like I'm getting super sicked out.

Speaker 2

All right, all right, all right?

Is this siconading?

Speaker 3

This is sickonading me.

Speaker 2

I was hoping it would be tantalizing, but it'sating.

Speaker 5

We don't want to be sick of ading?

Speaker 3

So what what's the verdict?

Speaker 7

When you watched Mike and Dave back, do you see the Honda ridgeline?

Speaker 5

You should.

I'm trying to show you guys, here there we go, okay.

Speaker 7

Because I was like, I was like Adams, we just hit because it's very quiet.

Speaker 5

Now I'm trying to show you guys, what now?

Speaker 3

What now?

Speaker 2

Cuts a commercial.

Speaker 5

That's That's what I'm talking about.

Speaker 3

Why is it off to the side.

Why is it off to the side.

The dude, is your finger touching the very end of it?

Speaker 4

Yeah, you're touching your own dick in that moment.

Speaker 5

I'm probably trying to tick a lit a little bit.

Speaker 3

I bet you, there's no doubt in my mind.

Speaker 2

Why is there of picture Zach has a picture of himself grabbing his dick too.

Speaker 3

Oh yeah, that's him.

Speaker 2

I thought that was you, Adam, But we're adjusting.

Speaker 5

I think people cared more about Zach stick and you know, there's more photos of this TMZ.

It ended up not making the movie, I think because it was obscene.

Speaker 3

You know, it was a little too risque.

Yeah, it's sicking me off.

Speaker 6

It was too like my cock is just like out and about.

Speaker 3

That's that.

Yeah, you made up for it with Game Over man though.

Yeah.

Speaker 5

Yeah, I really let him.

I really let him know it for that movie.

Speaker 3

Yeah that was brought to you by Honda Ridgeline.

Yeah we did that one, dude.

Speaker 7

So you have these like chunks to memorize.

And it broke my brain because at Workaholics it was a little bit more like passing the mic yeah, and if we did go on a rant, it was most likely not scripted, so.

Speaker 4

You're still passing it back and forth because it's improv yes, and we would.

Speaker 3

Be improvising, and if we had like a long thing, you could kind of wing it and change a word here, we're there.

But so like my brain just broke doing that.

Speaker 7

And then ever since I've done that show, I can memorize things so much easier than.

Speaker 3

Ever before, really just because I had to, because I was like, well, fuck, I don't want to be the guy who doesn't know it.

Yeah.

Yeah, and now to read something memorizing it, it's unless there's like a weird fucking Every once.

Speaker 7

In a while, there'll be something that I just can't click with.

Yeah, it'll be like this line will not transfer in my brain for some reason.

Speaker 3

Right, do you think those like when you have the skill?

Speaker 4

I mean, I've never done it, but do you think like those actors like your friend on the soap is he like taking a fucking picture of the page with his mind?

Speaker 3

Like how is that happened?

That's Meryl Streep apparently, like she can read a script once or twice and has it memorized.

Has it has like images of it and she knows where No, not.

Speaker 7

Even well, I don't know if it's it's she sees the page or she internalizes what she's read, but she just can read it a few page And I'm like, well, no.

Speaker 3

Wonder you're good then.

Speaker 5

Yeah, exactly.

Speaker 3

If I could memorize like that and how baked into my soul that quick, I'd be so good.

Yeah, she's not that good as what I'm saying.

Speaker 2

She sucks.

Speaker 3

She just has this incredible skill.

Speaker 5

There was a time that I called myself like rocketman, no jokes.

I called myself the rocket man and cut hundreds of dollars of rockets in my truck and a trunk of my car and then you know, behind the subwofers, No big deal, and.

Speaker 3

That's so country.

I love when you talk about them.

Speaker 5

And then just had so many rockets, and whenever I was at a party or gas station or parking lot or anywhere, it would just throw a rocket.

Speaker 3

Rocket Man, this is the way, rocket man, You got a rocket?

Yeah, let me get into my trunk behind the sub.

Speaker 5

Yeah.

Meanwhile, no one called me rocketman.

It was a thing that I'm I definitely was trying to get going for myself.

Speaker 4

You've never made French toast out of a regular loaf of bread in your entire what you always have French toast, boche?

You always have brioche bread.

Speaker 3

I never make French toast out of nowhere you plan to do it.

Speaker 5

I didn't even know French toast was a thing?

What that fuck that you can just make at home?

Speaker 3

Until he golfed with Michelle.

Speaker 4

We you're you're planning.

You're always planning your French toast.

Onders always enough where you can go get your bread?

Speaker 3

Yeah?

What?

Yeah?

Speaker 5

How often, Kyle?

How often are you making French toasting?

I didn't even know you could make that at home.

I thought that was like a restaurant specific This is a thing French.

Speaker 3

Are you like a Denny's thing?

Speaker 5

I thought that was a Denny's type thing.

Speaker 3

It is a Denny's type thing.

But French toast is also the type of thing that's.

Speaker 4

Supposed to You're supposed to it's supposed to sweep you up in the moment you're supposed to get an idea for French.

Speaker 2

Toast, ablutely not.

No instant pancakes are bisquick.

Speaker 3

Oh love me some biscuick.

But it's the same concept.

Speaker 2

No, French toast is like forced bis quick.

Pancakes are to shake it poor.

Speaker 4

You guys don't enjoy cooking at all, right, you don't.

You don't enjoy cooking.

You don't like that part of the kitchen.

Speaker 3

Me, no, do you cook?

I'm seriously on the pancakes.

Speaker 2

I grill pancakes.

Speaker 4

You're not cooking, and you're making the easiest pancakes on planet Earth.

And durs is planning as French toast missions.

So you guys are not just going into the kitchen and looking at what you have and saying, like, if you make bit.

Speaker 7

I love Kyle's like the guys like, I'm just gonna see what ingredients I have when I can make with them.

Speaker 4

My house, we make dinner every night.

Bro, Like my wife is the cook.

But like I we're talking about us, We're.

Speaker 2

Talking about We're talking about Daddy's home.

Speaker 5

That's why I'm surprised about French toast.

Speaker 7

I don't say your wife is the cook.

Your wife cooks mostly most.

She kick cooks the most.

Speaker 3

She does.

She is the cook out of the two of us.

She is.

She teaches me, she teaches me.

But you're talking about a dad meal.

Speaker 4

French toast is a motherfucking dad meal, absolutely, so what the fuck?

Speaker 3

Lucky Charms is a day meal.

Speaker 5

Brok to Wieners Mitchell Domino's mother is a dad littles.

Speaker 4

I mean, yes, I'm not going to discount these.

These are good dad meals.

But French toast, French toast.

Speaker 2

I can make French toast, but can you?

Speaker 5

I don't even I didn't even know that's something that's real, dude.

Speaker 2

Yes, it's very easy.

Speaker 3

What's the process?

Speaker 2

You scrambled the egg, you add the cinnamon, you get bread in it.

Speaker 3

Yes, that's what you don't You soak the egg and the bread and the egg.

Speaker 2

On the griddle.

Speaker 3

Yes, it's so easy, and it's the bomb.

Speaker 2

Not as easy.

Speaker 6

You got to own a griddle.

Speaker 5

So this is like rich people ship.

No wonder why my family never had.

Speaker 3

You can do it and it bro that's beautiful.

Speaker 5

God damn.

Speaker 7

I think I posted a picture.

I was working out one day and just afterwards stretching.

Speaker 3

On a man and oh, I get it from the mall where I was laying uh belly down and like sweat stain mark of my dick, and I brought I brought everybody in the gym over to check.

Speaker 2

Everybody, come look at this.

That's kind of funny if you're like, hey, what what is this?

What is this?

Speaker 3

This?

Speaker 5

Like what That's how you got to do it.

That's how you got to do it.

You can't just say come look at my dick here to be like, wait, what is this?

Speaker 3

Guys?

Speaker 2

What is this on my on my sweat stain?

Speaker 3

I got a picture all posts, come here.

I was just laying down.

I was just laying down.

Speaker 2

Dude.

Speaker 6

This is actually weirding me out.

Speaker 2

Dude.

Yeah, I'm kind of freaked out.

Speaker 6

I'm freaked out right now.

What is this?

Speaker 3

I wasn't even on this mat?

Speaker 2

What is it?

Speaker 3

Is it moving?

I was laying down here?

Do you think a ghost was laying down next to me?

Speaker 2

Did somebody drop a banana over here?

This is weird?

Speaker 3

Yeah, that was soaked in like weird.

Speaker 5

This is so weird, Like what is this?

It's like you could see those are my thighs.

That is my abdomen.

Speaker 3

But what is it?

Speaker 2

What is that?

But what is that?

Speaker 3

Drop a banana and two kiwis down here?

That's it my lunch.

It's my lunch.

It was banana and Kiwi's.

Speaker 2

That was my Oh yeah, that's right.

I had a whole heart salami right.

Speaker 7

Where my like belly button stops like a little below that.

And then I started I started like showing my shorts to everybody.

Speaker 3

I mean, is it my shorts?

I mean the tennis balls, my fucking I forgot.

Speaker 5

Huh those I will say, those are some of my favorite jokes.

Right there, I was.

Speaker 2

Look at your penis.

Speaker 3

Forcing people to acknowledge the disgusting thing.

Speaker 2

Yeh uh, huh wait what is that?

Speaker 3

That's obnoxious?

Speaker 5

It's obnoxious, obnoxious comedies, my favorite.

Speaker 3

Commercials.

If you had to say what it is, what is it?

Speaker 5

I would say, it's your cat, my cock.

Speaker 2

That's like when that dude is getting searched by the police.

Speaker 3

But yeah, then you can't believe it.

Then you can't believe it.

Is that your dad?

Speaker 8

What?

Speaker 5

No way, that's you Wait a second, that's like a really nice looking cock, though.

Speaker 4

That would belio you think that's my dick.

That's incredible.

But no, no, no, no.

Speaker 2

Sir, no, there's no way.

That beautiful thing is my car.

Speaker 6

Wait that can't you know what?

Speaker 2

You might be right that?

Speaker 3

Wait, hold on, let me just take a peek real quick.

Speaker 5

I'm not just because I was the one laying here and this is where my cock would be.

Speaker 2

You might be right.

Holy hang on a minute, I'm seeing now.

Speaker 3

It's like a magic eye.

Speaker 2

I'm saying, I get it.

That is my cock.

Speaker 3

I am so sorry.

I'm so sorry.

Speaker 2

I am sorry for that.

Speaker 3

I apologize.

Well, that deserus.

Speaker 2

That's an interesting You need a measurement.

Speaker 3

I'm gonna go get lunch.

Speaker 5

I'm hungry for a subway sandwich.

Speaker 7

Speaking of six inches, I'm gonna go get that half a sandwich at something and.

Speaker 6

Oh boy, half of a foot long.

Speaker 3

Let's go, Kyle.

Speaker 7

While you were gone, I cried watching the New Ghostbusters, the Paul Red one.

Speaker 2

The Paul Red One.

Speaker 3

Is that what we're Yeah, that's what I'm that's what.

Well, I don't know.

I'm coming out of a hole.

Did you see it?

No, I'm coming out of a hole.

I just saw the first image.

Speaker 6

Where can we watch it?

Can we watch?

Can we rent it?

Speaker 2

Yet?

Speaker 3

I don't?

Speaker 6

It's viable on h.

Speaker 3

I think so yeah, No, you can get on iTunes.

Speaker 4

I saw okay, I think I saw a little banner for it the other day.

Speaker 3

I think that's how I know it's one that was well done.

My kid loved it, that's all I know.

So you cried, you cried.

Speaker 6

Yeah, it's uh, that was weird how that feels.

Speaker 3

But you know what, I'm actually pissed about it.

Yeah, so of mine.

Speaker 5

I feel like I was being manipulally kind of lost my tough friends.

Speaker 2

Yeah, it's like they're the fucking as.

Speaker 3

Yeah, and you know what, as your tough friend as I'm sure for everyone.

Absolutely, Yeah, it's tough not to be that anymore.

Speaker 6

Right, Well, sorry, my emotionally unavailable friend.

Speaker 2

Thank you.

Speaker 3

I'm proud of you.

I'm proud of you.

Speaker 5

My soulless friend guarded, my soulless friend, my robotic friend.

Speaker 3

Took a good job.

Yes, I just need to reach out.

Speaker 2

I just need my brother, our boy Teddy friend of the show.

We mentioned him on the pot a few times.

Speaker 3

Speaking of balls to the chest.

Speaker 2

He said that there was a time when he was playing Little League and he was up to bat and he like swung, swung, swung, and he let it go a little too much.

It came back around and he ended up just clocking the catcher like right in the dome and like knocking the kid out.

Speaker 3

I think that was a pretty brutal like.

Speaker 4

I think that ended very brutal, like it knocked him out, and I think there was even like wasn't there like they were.

I'm like, yeah, I think he got because he was swinging the bat like a crazy person.

Speaker 5

Well, that happened to me at a family reunion, and it was my my uncle, did it to you?

That's to me was I wasn't the catcher.

I was standing in the batter's box.

Speaker 2

I was eating cake, and he just came up.

Speaker 5

Hits the ball and then throws the bat behind him and it clocked me right in the face.

I knocked out my two front teeth, and I luckily they were baby teeth, so I was I was like, you know, I guess I don't need these teeth anymore.

Speaker 3

But how long were you without your teeth?

A while?

Speaker 5

Like a long while.

Speaker 4

My son busted his shit out like recently.

They're not coming back until he's like seventy's three years old.

He's gonna have no.

Speaker 6

I think I was like seven or eight, so they were already like on the way in.

Speaker 7

Oh, we had a young tooth knockout here too.

It took like two and a half years to come for the big dog to drop.

Speaker 3

Yeah.

Speaker 5

Also, kids are like way doper than adults.

They're always doing crazy shits and knock teeth out of their face.

Speaker 2

Also, why don't we lose teeth one more time in our life?

We should lose them around age thirty.

Speaker 4

That would be nice if we had like our grandpa teeth coming in.

Speaker 6

I'd love another set.

Speaker 2

I feel like you.

I feel like humans should lose their teeth one more time.

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