ABC123 Mickey B Matthew D on Tea with Me with she and ET Don't.

Will it be a good episode?

Let's see.

Yes, that's the pot.

Turn into a bit of a CBBC sort of thing there.

See on CBBC.

It wouldn't be Oh.

My.

God, oh, I didn't see that one.

Can we?

You didn't even see.

I do see.

Fuck.

Me, I do see beforehand.

Well, actually I'd use the.

What will you have for tea?

Tea with me, I said.

Tea with me?

Yeah.

Denzi and Mickey Bartlett are my guest.

2 cargo hoodie boys.

Just wrapping it like like 2 cholos.

Did you see how you touched my leg and even flinch I.

Actually.

Feel like I fucking relaxed in a little.

Bit yeah, do it.

Again, homes, we were talking out there.

Do.

You.

Want that was.

Christmas do.

What that was, that was the set that what he calls.

You.

That slap you did was like you wanted the effect of a slap, but you weren't sure this one hurt.

Yeah, it was.

So how old are you?

It was sexy but respected.

At the sign of age.

Seen about three years.

You'll do that again.

But you're homecoming, I guess.

Yes.

You get the hope.

I'm sorry.

Yeah, Yeah, yeah.

Fucked by you're fart.

She loves it.

Best granddaughter ever.

Hope you go.

Yeah.

I like them up until that point.

I know that's how I get to like Jimmy Savile.

We should have.

We should have.

Signs with our.

Definitely, yeah, he including the one he used to hold 10.

I am a non time I getting away with this.

We're talking about the movie.

Is it the babysitter?

Is that what it's?

Called That's what Mickey was watching all month.

Because she can't.

He can't differentiate between his staff.

You're the babysitter.

You're the houseman and the gardener, Sir.

Where she from?

Turf Lodge go up man actually 6.

Come on now, come on now, the Holy Lands, the what's called the Butler and.

Here's the thing.

Better before we start talking.

None of us have seen it.

None of us have seen it, but we're we're active, you know, we're seeing the reaction, the folk, the lore of it and the general consensus is to be seems to be Sidney Sweeney has them out, but no nipple.

We're not seeing nipple.

Can I then ask, is that truly having them out kind of a philosophical here?

If a tree falls in the forest, but no one if it's.

You know, if I have, if I was topless here and I was.

Calling my hair.

Don't be afraid.

This cootie's too nice.

I couldn't.

Couldn't possibly.

But if I had my tits out but with my nipples covered, you wouldn't necessarily call them out, would you?

See the pet if you're if you're completely sands top and you've got plasters over them, that is topless.

Yeah.

Are they?

Are they out?

They're not out for the lads, but they're out.

Yeah, out for the general public, not necessarily the lads.

Yes, yes.

And they're the, but they're the main parts.

Oh, I don't like.

That I see you're familiar with that technique.

You utilised a few, yeah.

We've all got an FM radio.

Come in, come in.

I would come on.

But is she?

She's like the number 1B of no issue she.

Has a babe like.

I don't know #1.

Then you get to you having a babes folder in your PC with his head.

Yeah, no, it says cars, but you go into it BI.

Don't know, I think.

I have one that says cars and you go into it is actually just cars though, yeah.

Alphabetical.

But there's women on them.

But then I go where I can't drive and I close.

What's good in to you today?

Not much too soft drills so far.

Have you eaten anything?

Should have, said Greg's.

Like see Greg's just because of my dietary stuff.

I, I, I'm not a Greg's guy, but I imagine once you get into Greg's, you're in it looks like.

Do you know the way there's, there used to be loads of big supermarket chains or still is, but it's basically like Tesco's would be the big one and there was loads of sport shops.

It was JJB, there was loads, I can think of one, but now it's Sports Direct, that's a the sport shop.

So you would say.

Would you say Sports Direct is this sport?

Show it.

Would not be lifestyle sports.

I'm AJ.

I'm AJ D man myself.

Yeah, I'm talking about like general equipment.

If I'm talking about fashionable lifestyle sports clothing, I would say lifestyle sports.

But what I'm saying is Sports Direct is you're like meat and veg sports shop.

Like tennis rackets?

Golf.

So you would say.

I'm going to turn up a stick in a bubble red.

I'm going to turn up at your funeral tomorrow when you're because you're deaf another.

Funeral tomorrow will be a couple days after.

No, we rushed it through because I can't tell the.

Family there do Wicks.

I'm away, can't buy something on Sunday and it's a Friday.

That will be Monday before anything really happens.

I'll be turning black.

Why can't you buy them on a Sunday?

Chapel is closed.

I don't know it's.

Is that not the main day?

Actually, I think that's why I think because they're basically nowhere doing mass.

Oh, you can't bury them.

Oh, you can't take away the attention from the mouse.

Yeah, fuck, that's why equipment not at all the paedophilia.

They wouldn't let you.

The tag went over to walk through the door.

The holy water was.

Starting to permit the tag.

That's a good nice one.

Sippers, This episode of the Team With Me podcast is sponsored by none other than That Prize Guy, Ireland's largest prize competition page.

It's man as prizes coming out of his his ears, his arse, he loves it.

We're talking prizes up to £1,000,000 cash.

Is it cash down or you reckon it's probably a transfer?

It'd be a transfer, not cash.

I'd be mental.

It would be absurd.

But if anyone's going to do it, it would be that price Guy, you won that price guy.co.uk.

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Like give me an example of those things going on there, Dan.

Rolls Royce Cullen, then, have you seen this car?

He's been.

He's been in some of the videos.

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What a nightmare.

Archers been a Rolls Royce and a quarter of a mil.

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I wouldn't.

I'd be scared about driving a Rolls Royce.

Yeah, but it'd be nice for a couple of weeks.

Just how good?

It'd be cool for a while.

I take the quarter of the mill and then rent the Rolls Royce for a day.

OK.

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To be in with a chance to win.

If you're not any, you can't win it.

When a winner checking dinner.

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Right now, 20 pence.

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Good maths.

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Well, I'll tell you some odds that prize guy plus your chance to win equals happy days, maybe.

Thank you to that prize guy.

We're also telling you about our patreonpatreon.com/tea With Me podcast.

It's all going on over there.

We've got the chase episode is on there.

There was a blank screen with Neil Delamere at the top.

A big, a big board type thing.

Fausty and his team of magicians have some high put graphics on that that weren't there on the day.

So if you're watching, you're going, Oh my God, these graphics must have been distracting people.

There wasn't even anything there.

Me, Tim McGarry, William Thompson, Leon Mccurry playing against the chaser that is Neil Dellamir, hosted by Dave Elliot.

Unbelievable.

My one of my answers.

I've rewatched the clip 10 times and I'm still mortified.

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What I'm saying is what we were saying.

You buy your you buy your vegetables.

Great.

Great.

Right, You would say instead of saying go to the supermarket, you'd say I'll get that in Tesco.

Instead of saying go to the sports shop.

If you need a bobmenton racket, you go just go to Sports Direct.

Greg's to me is becoming like just.

The.

#1 High Street food, fast food place.

That's not a McDonald's.

Does that make sense?

I get where you're coming from, but it's so much more than that.

Right.

Sell it to me.

It's I've we've tried to us, yeah.

If you want to be like me, hey you, you want to look like these two fucking 2 fucking guys over here?

Oh, that's the extent that's.

What?

He says we ask for a donut.

Oh, you know the things with the OS?

Forget about it.

No, you.

Can't call them out anymore, Jesus Christ.

So.

But what I'm saying they're now big set in ones.

To I would say used.

To be we convenience.

But I would say Greg's is like the fast food version of like a Gap or a Primark.

They're everywhere.

You can't work more than 10 feet.

Let's see the Greg's.

Yes.

But if you want my sausage roll recommendations with Bob and birds all the way.

But before we get on that, are we seeing less Greg's the the person, more Greg's the bakery?

Is there less, Greg?

I'm seeing more Greg's the franchise.

It doesn't feel like it has the same family effect that used to.

Are we not typically more Craig's here?

Should that not be the?

Rebound.

I'm talking first.

That's a.

Good.

No, I know.

So my you don't really get Greg's here, you get Craig's.

And I think Greg's missed the trick not calling it Craig's when they came over.

Yeah, have we where we should?

Call it tigs.

Do you think we've had a Craig this year born?

Do you think we've had a Craig born Northern?

Ireland, I think 26.

I don't know, I think I maybe.

It's like there'd be a.

Gregory.

There'd be a Gregory.

The Dial of the Grand, his name, he was Craig.

So he's Craig Junior.

That's maybe the only way a Craig's getting in 2026.

No, Craigory, why is that not?

Why not catch on?

I like the way you work.

No, Craig.

What else do you think we're not?

Get what?

What names do you think?

We haven't had Northern Ireland 2026 yet?

Do you have had a Darren?

We've had a Darren.

I would say there's still a lot of a lot more Danes, a lot more Danes than you would expect.

Why?

Are you so confirmed?

Like, why are you so sure that we've had a?

Just no, man.

We baby does.

I just, I know there's there's Deathly, but Darren's one of those fucking.

It's It's in the.

It's in the.

Bread and butter names.

Yes, yes, definitely.

Do you think we've had a Clive 2026?

No.

Ah, Clive's gone.

Do you know any?

Clives, We had a Clive last year at Clive.

Anderson.

Anderson, you don't know.

Yeah, I do.

Oh so.

Can I miss you in Glasgow?

Yeah, I met him in Edinburgh.

They not.

I didn't seem to because after he came to the show, because I've did radio show the next day and I was like, thanks for coming.

He was like, yeah, good night.

And he was like, got to get this over.

And genuinely me and while they were there, I was like, I don't think he liked that.

Well, he's like, no, he did.

He didn't.

He didn't like it was radio shows from the next day.

You know, you don't know.

No, I know the football commentator Clive.

Tells me tells me but Clive Anderson we short comedian yeah he had a chat shows.

Anyway.

Mine, he had a chat show, but he had a real operate.

Who were the Bee Gees worth looking up?

Very old, really.

Yeah, Bee Gees walked off like.

Because he didn't like the gig.

He.

Didn't like the gig?

You went to the night before.

Have you any meat that you like the gig?

And he was like, why didn't you like the gig?

He was like, you're grown man.

They're like, wait, no.

Is it Dave used to do a bit about Bee Gees or like an unbelievable group with so many hits, but if we went and X Factor nowadays he'd be like.

No.

Do you have anyone in your group of friends with an old man name?

Yeah, who see him?

Don't make any.

Old man names.

Yeah.

No couple of columns.

Yeah.

Fergus is a Fergus, an older man named that would be it's.

Fergal.

An older man named Fergal.

Yeah, I know.

3 Fergals.

3 Fergals.

2.

Still a lot.

It's a lot of Fergals, like trying to think actually when the same class is going to spell their name different so we could tell the difference between two of them.

But we were like, we can do that with your face.

Few boys will drop.

Don't look like you drop an A in 2A's in.

I know one that's FERGIL and another one that's FEA or GHI.

G7 off squiggly line fuck.

Away off a relax you.

Know if you don't.

Like go home more over to draw then.

Do you want your Greg's order?

Do you know what?

Weirdly enough, I actually ordered one to the house the other week.

Yeah, I know.

That's.

The height of that.

Yeah, and, and do you know what?

It was shit too.

2 sausage rolls, a slice of pizza and some cheese bites.

Now what The the hear me out.

What happened was I ordered it and then they were taking the fucking piss.

To be quite honest.

Uber eat.

Yeah, no, just eat.

But it kept saying it'll be here in an hour.

And I was like, how could it possibly taken all the foods there?

Do you pay for priority and do you do we tip?

On deliver, I don't tip because.

If you don't tip I think.

I'd have to get there quicker.

That's for you.

No, I you can pay for priority on delivery now, so you can't right?

Do actually 250 no problem, but I didn't know.

Do they know that you tipped them before you've tipped them?

Have to the brander.

Do the Oh yeah, maybe I've missed a trick there, but they anyway, I cancelled the order and then I did it without the cheese bites reordered it and they set the cheese bites anyway as and I think that was like in a way of an apology right from them to me.

Yes, and I accepted from Craig.

Yes, well, Craig was the driver.

No, Mohammed.

Right.

Definitely like it was almost slim if.

You can't bring the cheese bites to him, he'd bring them to you.

Now do you?

First, you're a man who loves food delivery.

Delivery to whatever delivery do you have you had the same guy multiple times?

There's one guy I don't want to say though, because it's.

Just.

There's one guy so I opened, I was attacking an edible and I'd order myself more wee snacks and I it was kicking in as I was open the door.

So I was like, don't laugh when you open this door, you're already giggly.

Don't laugh.

And then I opened the door and this guy I the only way I can describe this man was it was like join at the clown pretends to be a human, but his eyes give it away.

So he had like a lazy eye but it was also white and I bossed out laughing his face like.

Mr Dade's at the door, yeah.

Yeah, it was.

It was fucking the Hawaiian guy and 51st dates.

You got a cat or something?

Someone's looking at me.

That was Christopher Walker, that there.

Do you know you some last night, the way to get the gig?

The boys were telling me I'd love Peep Show.

I've never seen Peep Show.

Never seen Peep Show?

Never seen.

I've never.

Seen bits and pies themselves.

It's great, they said.

I love it.

It sort of.

I have a bit of sense of dread watching it though, in case I think like, what if that happens to me and I end up like one of these guys?

What do you mean rich and famous?

No, not in, no.

Like one of the guys in the show, like Mark Corrigan, very boring guy, has a bit of a sad life, lives with this man.

He's a bit reckless, right?

I just think, you know, what if.

What if?

Yeah.

If me and you live together.

Who would do you think?

I'm the I'm the mad one.

You think I'm I'm not.

I'm fucking mental, mint.

But I'm crazy, Dindy, I'm insane.

You don't understand.

I'm on hinge, bro.

I.

Voices in my head, man.

Yeah, but.

That's just me whispering.

This just keeps.

I'm just sadder.

I genuinely am unhappy.

Yeah, I'm going to kill myself.

I need help right now.

Sometimes I go.

Googling gun parts.

Sometimes you order a bridge just for a chat.

Just for a chat, yeah.

Chat, no food.

I order an overdose sort of bridge.

I actually stopped an old man today walking past my street just for a conversation.

And you know what?

I haven't stopped thinking about how good I am.

Do you know?

No, he just walked.

Past my Did he look sad?

No, he was walking his big dog.

He always walked past my house with his big tiny dog, he says.

Here, Mitt, how old's your dog?

He said 50.

But that sounded like how old's she?

You know, just like you're Megan.

Trying to ride it.

Sounds like you're.

But then he said 15.

You're like.

Maybe, but human years?

Because he he always walks past the dog.

And I thought, I'll just strike up a conversation here.

So how old is the dog?

And he couldn't wait to tell me all about his dog.

And then I went the way thinking he probably loved that conversation.

But then in reality, he probably went home and thought, the fucks that guy's crack.

Although he probably did enjoy it.

Yeah, he would enjoy.

I could see you talking to old Manly.

Yeah, it seemed like a wee guy being the road, working for the Salvation Army, just chatting.

Oh no.

I don't want that and old man, I want old man who's got a bit about them.

Give me a bit of.

Advice.

Get a bit of dough.

Never mind.

Oh, you want like a wee sugar Grande?

Oh, why we sugar Grande.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Would you like?

Fibre after.

Conversation.

How much time would you be willing to commit to him?

You give him an hour a week.

An hour a week for a score 100% yes.

Your money, now would you in that bath?

Would you take the money off from cash in hand?

He's not a bank transfer.

I don't assume he's.

Not going to pull out his household.

Him it would be like when you're taking money off a grandparent or something, you know I can't I can't go off with if my.

Grandparents are dead, but I still do it.

We.

Fight their patch.

Making the house brick by brick maybe?

Weekend at Bernie's, his granny and grandma still down to the post office every other.

It was a big doll.

You'd be more than fucking wheelchair.

She big lady.

What was her name?

Bertha.

Sally.

Sally, Sally.

Big Sally.

Sally.

Don't think there's been many Sally's born now.

I I Curtis.

I Curtis.

Sally one time.

Your granny?

No, technically I did.

You ever get a granny kiss?

There's no teeth in you're all Ah, would you get Emma?

I remember my granny gave me a kiss one time, like in the eye because I was trying to move and her fucking big Sally.

Big Sally hit me with a big.

Like a big.

Stranger things are.

Barb but it's sucks it's.

Fucking rottenness.

Yeah, No, I no Sally's this year for sure.

No Sally's.

There's part.

Of me, I would say Sally's.

No, I would say Sally's come back.

I think it was Sarah.

I think her name was Sarah.

But.

Did you finally?

Come back because old lady names became a thing for.

Her interests and all.

Fucking Nora's and demplers and all come.

Back.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Did you not find that weird going with a girl who had the same like name as your granny?

I couldn't go with a Saundre.

Like it's it was weird.

You actually had the same tits.

That was that was the weird.

But I was, I guess I'm Kenny, yes.

I don't know where Sally's upturned at the end like a wee elf shoe.

Did.

You call her nipples or Sally's.

Or we Sally.

'S Sydney Sweeney didn't get her fucking Sally's out in that Boston film.

Just that's a name you haven't heard while in Sydney.

Do all right?

Do all old lady names work as boobs?

You know what I mean, Berthas.

Couple of margarets for.

The boys.

Yeah, I think you're on something.

She was your readers.

Oh, shake your readers.

What are the one of their old lady names?

Deirdre.

Falsely.

What's your what was your granny called pots?

The pots.

Shows your pots.

That's if she's lying her back.

Down if you want to.

If you don't want to, you feel disrespectful, don't.

Olive.

Olive, Olive.

There's no push on them.

What's your granny called?

No.

Come on.

I don't want to do.

It don't.

Come on.

Peggy, that's a different thing.

That's a different thing, you know.

What the name came?

Her name was actually Tina, which is a reputation.

And she was simply the best.

I know.

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Cherry on the cake bonus cake dot com the link is in the description calf yeah granny kisses were so my granny wasn't wouldn't give you like a you know granny's you like aggressively kiss you yeah you just gotta be kissing the cheek from from.

My granny would.

That'll be kissing the cheek.

There's times my granny would hatching the cheek and you'd look at my ground.

Legal.

You're lucky, man.

I I used to get my granddad kissing the cheek and then I realised none of the other boys in family were doing it and I didn't do.

It did, you see, after Look Letter won the World Championships there, he kissed us down on the lips on stage.

I I'm all for like.

That punched me in the face.

Do you remember?

Snog me, Close your eyes.

Mean it through the bum.

So.

Biting your lip.

On the back of the head.

So do you remember David Beckham?

Like when his daughter was like fucking a toddler kissed her on the lips and people were like Oh my God.

And I was like that's fucking ridiculous to call.

Weird to even have an opinion on him doing that his daughter but we look like they're kissed us down on the lips.

I.

Cannot kiss one of his sons my lips though.

Probably, but like.

Well, there's a video of Tom Brady, you know, the NFL star, he he's getting massaged on and there's a video of him kissing his son on the lips.

Now, it sounds like an appropriate age to be doing it.

The inappropriate part is how long the kiss goes on for because they hold it.

It's not a quick pack, it has.

To be a pack David Packham.

Yeah.

It has to be a tickle me.

Can I be honest?

Tickle me.

I'm not not much safe from you.

Enjoy yourself, that's good.

But yeah, you can't.

Think it was there was.

You don't think it's?

A kiss like.

Eyes open.

He actually calls him back for more as well in the video.

I think watch the video someone who's he's getting a massage that he brings the sun and the sun's.

Not kissing on the lips while getting a massage.

Crucially, what?

Crucially, what's he getting massaged?

Like is is thighs and shit.

Ah, it's too much money.

Or is like what do you call them?

Your hamstrings.

Yeah, starving, I said.

Ham, we're all excited.

Yeah, too long.

I look like they're kissing down the lips down somewhere.

Because also with dad looks kind of young because he looks so old.

Yeah, his dad looks young.

You should kiss you're down the lips of the SSE.

So like, bring him on stage with kessing the lips.

Really.

With Dennis you, if you said the Dennis, I dare you not to kiss me.

The lips he did.

You say that old real man next time walking the dog inside your house, go ahead and.

Just kiss him on the lips.

Plant one on him.

Yeah.

Now I'm a cheek kisser.

Yeah.

For like, if you, if, if you were, if you got the worst news of your life and you're really upset about it and I was giving you comfort and words, I give you a hug and go, mate, you're OK.

Be all right, We can check.

I don't know about that.

I would like that I I I would kiss it doing the cheek if he's done well something yes, well done mate, but bad news that's a handshake and I'm sorry for.

Your trouble?

Sorry mate, I wouldn't even go out for a hug.

I I squeeze your bum about.

It.

Well, that might make me feel even better.

Yeah, you know what?

Something really bad that happened to me just there now just realised Sally's dead.

25 years like but still.

What is you and Sally dead?

11 24 we but I think it was I didn't really know my granny was wee, but Junior 11 you're like, it's just my granny not gonna.

He is this.

Grounded I was crying my granddad because it was there at the time my not holding the pillow.

Not there I've told this at a Paul before, but my grandma, my dad's dad wasn't wasn't well.

I've been in hospital for a while known probably like not looking good and my dad I've cleared asking can I tell the story before but he was like son.

Now I'm Burrow mine 10 or 11 at this point optional to say this to me.

My dad goes.

I think when I when we go and see your granddad tonight, I think I'm going to have to I'm going to have to put him out of his misery.

Had the one I'm going on like that's something he was like I'm going to do it.

I've said that my brother, he goes, I've cleared it with them and it wouldn't take much and I'm going to go up and do it.

My grandda was fine like 2 days later, live for like another year and a half.

My dad was so my dad was so ready.

Pull the trigger.

What do you say?

Like was your grandda OK with it or did your dad just go to his brothers?

My granddad didn't know, like he was sort of like in the consciousness and stuff on medication and then the doctors were like, looks like he's recovering.

My dad went all right.

Just took the silencer off.

One last one last question unscrewed one that looks like balls I.

Don't know what's wrong with your balls with minority long and cylindrical.

Obviously you don't have some imagination.

I have.

That's a fucking big long sentence, I mean.

All right, OK.

Use all the sort of guys that would argue over imaginary guns.

If we were to hit man, yeah, we'd have an I.

Could see that.

I could see a hilarious Northern Irish comedy movie with you do playing Hitman.

Yeah, I can see that.

You better watch yourself.

Yeah, yeah.

I'm a bit slow to it, yes.

I don't know who we're killing.

And then I.

I see you 2 in a movie playing security guards in castle court who get hired for a contract kill.

No, even better fucking we're the night shift Watchmen and then the German bad guys come in and we have to do die hard.

Yeah, I feel like.

We end up just going to the Greggs.

Die Lord, fuck you.

No, because you said that's.

But I hard maybe.

I'd watch that like.

I feel like me and you would have the dynamic of like you're the manager in a call centre and I'm a new start and you've taken a real shine to me.

Yeah, yeah, I live in Guard Down.

Yeah, I said things like I used to party, you know?

Yes, yes, yes.

And you go, you go.

You're approaching one year off it.

Yeah.

So then the Friday this is Monday and work he.

Starts half day on Friday.

Yeah, you go.

That'll be me.

That'll be me one year off it and you're like.

I got it back on and then we're up the load of high jinks.

Yeah.

And then and it's called Dial Hard.

It's a case.

Dial hard.

It's a case to be careful what you wish for because you've got him back on it and.

You and then but Joe what I don't smoke the whole way through it.

Then we get to the third movie is Die Die hard with the Benson because I'm back in the bangs now too Yeah phone the wife.

Any headache?

What's fucking?

Your name's Colin Columbine.

No, I mean, it's a school shoot.

What's?

The 4th movie.

We.

Adopt the kid.

I like it.

You ever want the call centre?

Didn't.

Yeah.

I like, do not like, look, take one look at me.

I am quite clearly a call centre guy.

Inbound or outbound?

Indiana.

Inbound.

Oh, I was going to do the accent.

What were you?

What have we talked about this foreign?

Pod.

No.

Don't think so, no.

What was the company?

Vodafone upgrades, right?

It was.

Inbound though.

Inbound, yeah, yeah, so people would ring in, look in the upgrade No, it's because you're everyone wants a deal.

Everyone's a Hagler these days, but it was good.

Like there used to be a spot out the front of the building and it was like a big part like electric box and there would just be plastic bottles withholds in them everywhere.

And everyone is just the head fuck.

It's in it on their lunch break.

More than one person.

I you want, I swear to God the stack of bottles would go up to your knees.

Where was this?

West Belfast.

Right, sure.

How many calls did you have?

Did you a certain amount of calls you had to take a day?

I think like 30.

I want to say no, it wouldn't be 30.

I actually can't remember.

What sort of shifts are you doing?

Because I would put 9 to 9 sometimes.

No, I I was still intact whenever I was doing it.

So I was doing like 9 to twos on the weekends.

Did you get berated at any point?

Oh yeah there was 1 fella I kept saying I think I said like no worries two or something and the guy was like stop saying no worries because I am worrying.

I was like, sorry mate, no worries.

Yeah, Sarah.

Kuna Matata.

I was got I worked at a call centre once and a guy I was outbound and stuff we were trying to sell like was it PPI the fucking?

Insurance stuff.

If you had a loan, they sold you an insurance on that you didn't.

Need it was a weird thing where like.

Because all the ads weren't.

Yeah, it was all we went through the whole training and they were like any question, I'm like, no, but I had no fucking clue what I was doing.

And we were from these people in England.

And I got the whole way that like, I was about to make my first sale and the guy was just string me along and he was a former soldier and served here.

And he went, now I'm only joking.

Go fuck yourself, you feeling bastard, right?

And then I got told off by the manager for laughing because I was like, that's a fucking cracker.

Like, you got a laugh.

I was like, that was good though.

So you were selling people the idea that they could get PP.

We'll investigate yours.

Yeah, I was just home calling.

Yeah, but it was a complete scam because it was like they would only get in the end up like 30% of the money, the road, right?

Do you mean no when no fee?

Yeah, one of fucking things.

And it was like you got a fiver if they agreed to it.

Were you on like an early rate or were you like solely Commission based?

Early rate.

That's not too bad then.

But it was still the worst.

We worked for a month and it was like fucking never again because everybody, the place I worked in, everybody thought they were both Wall Street.

Yes.

So Monday morning they're all nosebleeds and fucking like because they're geared all weekend.

We actually we had to go work from home.

It was just whenever COVID first came in and I thought happy days furlough.

But they sent us home with the computers and everything.

And we had a student house at the time.

So I had to put my computer in just in the kitchen.

And they went like, my mates would have parties that I live with and I would just have to go and work and they would still be partying the next day and I'd have to like mute the quality or if there was like a line getting taken for something and they're like, go ahead.

And some, you know, I'm not proud of it, but sometimes I just kept drinking myself.

Just poleaxed selling fucking upgrades.

And better at it too, probably.

There was one time, one time I gave myself.

What the fuck?

I was a big dope smoker at the time and like, I gave myself a mission.

Any sale I get, I'll hit a bong and I've never sold so much in my life.

I got eight in a row or something and I was fucking rubber.

They're getting sick for the rest of the day.

That's fucking class.

I love you.

These are the kind of things we could be getting up to in our in our film Die Hard.

That's kind of place together.

Just do it one.

Just move that.

Just hear when have some caution.

I mean, you just.

Have a lot of shack up fucking right.

Would you like to go on like we trip together or anything?

Do you want a wee trip?

Yeah, we're that's cool down.

Where you going next week, Lanzarote?

Yeah, a couple.

Of weeks, yeah, we're at the same time.

Do you know why he's going away?

Why he's going?

Away.

Yeah, because his birthday.

It just happened to fall.

Do what birthday it is.

My birthday.

Is your 40th.

So 40th.

Is your is going to be your 40th Mac and.

He's nothing planned.

I'm going to Lancer on.

It so I'm floating the idea next Thursday after lazy boys we're going to drinking.

What do you think boys?

No.

Yeah, me and him is going.

You come.

Yeah, good Lancer on Yeah.

By the way, that laughing down would fucking I hate it if you will show up.

Lanzarote.

Because he has a surf boys like unusual kept.

About a hotel shut down you.

Wouldn't be allowed in my hotel.

Though I'd find a way in.

It's all the surf boys.

Did you hear Billabong?

And he's like, I'm in, give me a headset all down.

Would hate it if you showed up the Lanzarote.

He wouldn't mind for an afternoon.

I think he'd love it.

No, I think after with the third.

Would you love it?

After with the after with the 3rd or 4th Decker, he down he goes.

You know what?

You're fucking right.

Mike Fox surfing is gay.

Is that what you're going to Lanza Rally to do?

To surf.

It's just more to get some sun, but yeah, there might be some surf there as well.

I mean, he's bringing a board, so yeah, you.

Bring your board with.

That's not going to the same.

He puts in the overhead.

He's a selfish bastard like.

So funny watching someone trying to put a surfboard in those sweet things.

You can be two minutes, we have to put it down the back of your shorts, 20 foot above your head.

I don't know how big you are where all your surfboards.

20 foot above your.

Head You're a turn of 40 this year every.

Next year I've turned 40.

Next year, yeah, 39 in March are.

You going to do any big for your 40?

I might do something back from a 39th and then when I'm 40 wise up.

That's actually not a bad idea, to be honest.

I'd like I'd rather celebrate the end of my 30s than commemorate the beginning of my 40s.

What are you thinking you would do?

Is it a particular place you would go just?

Get back on the game it.

Right.

Just one final hurrah.

You mean get back on?

Get back on the horse head of your horses on this.

Head of PB, No, don't know, probably just, I do just like the idea of just a drinking.

Yes, we just go right, But there's nothing to do today or tomorrow.

We'll go there drinking and then the next day we all wake up and down.

It has to be.

It has to be a flight.

It has to be a flight or a Carling Ferguson has to be a flight.

No, I can.

I can do it.

Was this big thing to commemorate your 39th?

No, I mean and Largan like like go to the Woodville Arms and just fucking dead drink for two.

Days I get you the function room in the Dun Duns for a really good we.

Function we function room.

I've not a function room doing a long time.

Would you like GOT?

Could we get in the blades?

You wouldn't want it in the blades.

That's how you know that's different wishes.

We can.

That's the.

Difference in your late 20s and late 30s?

He was like, we couldn't get the strippers.

I'm like roller blades.

Well, my hips.

Yeah, I would let.

We'll do something nice for your 39th, then we'll have a 39th birthday party on Lazy Boys.

Class for you need to have a 40 for him, no, because 40s yeah.

Big 40.

I bring.

All that's why that's actually a real compliment that I'm so surprised you're going to be 40 soon.

I know, thought I was 40 already.

So that's how good your skin looks you're.

Going to be people will be like that's a 40 year old man.

People will be able to say that about you.

That's a 40 year old man.

Yeah, where?

People say people say he's only 40.

Yeah, yeah, sorry, 40.

Like, are you scared about being 40?

We bet.

I'm not scared, but it's it's a big one, like it's a bigger one than 30.

Is it?

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, it is.

People talk about being on certain floors of a building.

You're you're, you're up the 4th floor.

How big is the building?

Probably 10 realistically.

Oh yeah, you.

You're starting nine floors for me, 4 1/2 for you.

It's a bungalow with a conversion.

Yeah, I'll buy an elevator shaft like.

You're on the oh, you're on the shaft.

I'll be in a basement.

How do you get there now?

Why is 40 so significant?

Because it's.

As we're talking, we're going down the back 9.

Yeah, it's you're in the second-half.

I don't know, I think 30 and then that's your like 30 and then 50.

Fuck 40.

Fuck 40.

No I know 30s is grand like.

30 you want to get on with testosterone, do you think is that something you would do approaching 40?

You tell me I should.

Have you been fingertips?

That's not an offer is mean by the doctor.

I'm going to go happy bird.

This is how you think you should celebrate his 40th?

Well, because my daughter keeps telling me you need to get fingered before when you're 40.

Is he sound like?

That they use some sort of.

You know, examination.

Yeah, digitally penetrated, I think.

He said.

Yeah, I thought he was going to stay in my fucking VPN, but yeah, my daughter was like, man, get the letter sent out the NHS at 50 to get your prostate checked, but my doctor was like at 40 you should really be.

Really.

Checking just for you.

Yeah, said Doctor.

He was wearing a white collar and a black shirt.

Doctor Love.

He said his name was Doctor Love.

Doctor.

Yeah, it is.

What are your 38 this year?

Yeah.

How you think that 30 it's fine?

30 it's fine.

3039 I'm like.

I'm still running the boat like a weapon, like right, I'm still fucking loose.

I'm still, you know what I mean?

I'm on the boat.

I could, I could, I can run like AI can just start running.

Do you know what I mean?

Running no.

What was that I've?

Had so much caffeine I was forced Gump.

Oh, I am.

So you know, I've got a race with Glenn, you know Glenn was on the pod, challenge me to 100 metre race.

Do you see this?

I saw the clip last night, he put.

Up last night, Glenn put up a picture of him, 55.

He's in some shape.

You put up a video of him a ball me and I did training, sprinting and basically I hope you're training.

Do you think he's messing me about or do you think that's him sprinting?

I think he was.

It wasn't a long Sprint, it's maybe like 30 metres.

Yeah, if if he's messing me, which he could well be, I'm fucked.

If that really was him running, I'm going to take a lot of pleasure and like sprinting a 55 year old man.

I have Monica, I'm on toast.

OK, I'll do it with UCM Bolt near the finish line as well and just turn around slower.

I got him because he's in my head.

He is in my head.

What kind of training are you?

Doing for.

Just just straight up sprinting.

Yeah, I don't know what fucking training.

Some of the some of the mental stuff too like.

Metal sprints, yeah.

But I'm trying to like I'm trying to be.

I'm doing a lot of explosive work.

That's what I work out.

Uh huh.

The noise is just.

Yeah, that's not important.

But yeah, I was to say whenever I used to karate.

You ever done martial arts?

No.

You look like guy hears a real opinion on Martial.

Arts You look like you've got a good decent yellow belt.

Yes.

No or something.

I really don't like getting hit.

I'm very I have very sensitive skin.

That's what you do.

That's what you do in martial arts.

You don't.

Yes.

You'd be like water.

True, I've nothing water about me.

I no, not a martial.

Art No.

No.

When your kid didn't go to like a youth centre do we better fucking?

I played Xbox in my room, all this.

It was, and that's what I wanted to do.

It wasn't a sad, sad childhood like Crawley Gay, really, isn't it?

No, I mean.

Tell it to John Claude Van Damme.

OK, I'll give you a second one, Steven Seagal.

That's aikido, Stephen.

That is gay.

That's origami for people.

I doesn't have a dog, isn't it?

Yeah, I would love to do.

But you don't actually.

You don't actually hit people in karate.

Not Karai judo you.

Judo's flippin.

I have a friend who's a Commonwealth judo flipper.

Yeah, sorry to flex, but that's flipping people.

Moy ties kickboxing I like.

I know about it, I just never went to it.

Yes, I would want one with like a bit of striking involved and then a wee bit of flipping.

Jujitsu.

I think that's your one then.

That's what.

You want you do even a flipping karate and all, right?

I don't think I thought it was a non contact sort of thing.

I thought it was all about the is that Kung Fu?

Maybe it's all about Maybe.

That's what the Asian pensioners do in Botanic Gardens.

Look.

Partly great for you, for your lymphatic system.

Oh, why?

Well, they do have to be in a good old age.

Yeah, so they do.

Is it racist to say that?

No, I think it's no.

If it's complimentary.

Yeah, well, there's some complimentary ones.

That are fair enough, yeah.

We decks though be a nightmare would have been 102 a week cock for the nightmare being 39 a week it.

Was a great game and say you were going to have.

By the way, I just like to say they have their birds aren't very strong.

They have weak Hawks.

You can't tell Asian women like that either.

Say you're going to have one day, say work gets cancelled, you're going to have one day at home playing games in your room.

Yep, talk me through.

Work doesn't need to be cancelled throughout, by the way.

The games you're going to play, Yeah, we're not going to the games you're going to play and the snacks you're going to accompany it with.

Well, you can get a delivery.

You do whatever.

You want ARC Raiders?

I'll tell you what though.

I don't know whether.

That's yeah, I've just got it.

I.

Was playing with Willie, so it was.

Willie got me a headset.

Willie got it too.

I'm Sunday.

I'll give you a shout.

Yeah, 100.

Percent plus buck.

I'm pump.

Snack wise.

Put me through arc Raiders.

It's a.

3rd Lara Croft, Tomb Raider.

No, it's a third person extraction shooter.

So it's yeah, it's third person.

So it means over the shoulder you load in.

What do you mean over the short?

Genuinely.

The camera is over the show, you see, like, yeah, you know, way like Call of Duty's first person.

Yeah, this is third person.

What's What's second person?

That's a good question.

What?

Is there isn't such a thing that would be that would be like side on probably I imagine.

Right.

I don't know, I've never heard of a second person.

Second person be technically the old Grand Theft Auto's were bird.

'S eye view maybe?

Probably.

Second person is third person.

Not really difficult to control.

Well, no, it's it's you get used to it.

But I suppose if you're talking about like your first person perspective, like if you're writing in the third person, there's no you can't write in the second person.

Right.

Callum schizophrenic.

Yeah.

We've done it loads of times.

But our graders is the big thing.

What time is it set in?

The future.

It's a dystopian.

Future dystopian Future.

Ever.

It sounds it sounds really old.

Everyone lives on their ground.

On the top side is what it's called.

The Earth's controlled by robots and you need to fight between the robots and other players and you just want to go in.

The extraction shooter comes from you want to extract all the the stuff, basically all the loot.

What kind of stuff are we getting?

Just like metal, rubber, and then there's like different.

You're trying to get minerals out of a.

You're more.

Mad.

Max, you're trying to get leftover stuff, so we had a dog food for you, Sheila.

Snack wise though, I'm happy to say I've started my Manjaro journey.

Right, because you were talking about this at the end of the year, I think that you were going to be doing.

It I got it as a Christmas present, which is pretty.

Pretty Santa brought Santa brought you the job.

Yeah, which, and I didn't even ask for it.

So no, my mum got me and she got love her, she's on a tune.

She got us wee matching cases, wee wee blue case for my pen and wee pink case for her pen.

It's not matching, that's pink and.

Blue, his and hers.

All right, fair enough.

Which weird thing to say about something, yeah?

Tom Brady in her time for your.

Sucking her needle.

Fucking hell it's not.

Good.

When did you start it?

Two weeks ago, on the first week, I didn't really notice much difference.

I felt really good about myself, like just felt like great, wasn't tired or anything.

And then it was quite concerned.

It was like, what if I'm just diabetic and I'm just getting the medicine that I need?

Because is the thing, not that you feel like a wee bit.

Just.

What do you call?

It no, just not even.

I don't know.

I haven't felt that.

Nauseous you.

Know no not at all.

I've been getting a bit of a sore head but I honestly just haven't felt hungry ever.

And you have to like force yourself deep, which is bad.

I think the nauseous stuff comes in as you go up the dose of this if.

You go up the dose and then if you do end up eating and you eat too much then you would feel nauseous.

Nauseous but like I haven't eaten to the enem felt like I normally would be starving.

You would hear my stomach.

Are you exercising with it?

Paddle, paddle.

Yeah, got a paddle racket for Christmas too.

Nice.

So I've been have you in the paddle?

You want to see them Christmas Day, All right, It's good to see you kids out in the street with the.

Reneedle with the.

Needle in the re paddle.

It takes you back to get through some clock in the house for the next.

What did you get for Christmas?

I got a PlayStation steering wheel.

That's right, you have the foot pedals and all the.

Frost Master.

I don't even know what it's called.

The gear.

Second, you can drive manual or automatically.

It's got wheat flappy panels on.

It's actually the steering wheel.

It's better than my actual car, so I'll come back after four hours driving after a game, kind of relax.

What game do you have for?

I've been playing Forza right, but at I haven't played it enough because at the minute I'm just driving around looking for races, right?

Whites.

Blacks.

Yeah.

But yeah, arc Raiders.

You're just playing the Derek Bird game at the minute.

Yeah, it's a nice reference.

He was like actually drove around shooting people out of his car.

Here.

No, England, Oh.

I don't know who was on America.

Robert De Niro.

Remember, there's no in America that there was two of them.

One was driving, 1 wasn't like lying on the boot and they've cut a hole.

We're not.

Large for quite a while.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I picture Robert De Niro ties the tax for value cabs in my head 2.

50 minutes.

You stick in the back, you gotta pay for it.

No fucking no fucking vaping in here.

£50 if you're sick in there there's.

Too many fucking immigrants over here.

I don't recognise this place anymore.

Maybe a big David.

Value caps for your customers.

I do you very well.

I I've been working on a really keen impression for last people.

I just like to hear it.

Yeah.

What's his job?

What's he doing?

You're supposed to.

I don't get it.

Or camp.

You're camps, you're also leave it off.

My, yours.

What's he doing?

Is he qualified?

Obviously it's.

Actually getting better, right?

You're a bit late because the Cypon films already out.

Yes, I just like I could have been a lot to.

I auditioned.

Court.

I was asked with one of the coaches.

Like, really?

Yeah.

Fuck you, you didn't even get asked to audition, you got asked to be.

In it I just didn't do.

It Why are you being serious?

You're a nightmare.

They go do you want me in this Steve Coogan major motion picture?

No audition and you go no.

Why?

Why they?

Don't know about football.

They couldn't get in the character.

They didn't want you to fucking coach the Ireland national team.

I was going to have to try.

Next.

So Methodist like you're working on that game all week.

No, I probably, I probably was just an audition to offer or an extra.

But there was I remember being like, oh, that sounds good.

And then I just didn't choose it up.

I auditioned for it and Holiday really went for it.

Didn't get it.

Oh yeah.

What part was just any sort of role in?

It was playing like an FAI official right now when I saw the trailer and that there was scenes from that in it.

The guy's like a good bit older so I probably wouldn't have been.

Right for, you know, the like, you could say who the guy.

Is yeah, yeah, yeah.

That's happened a lot of times where like I've auditioned.

I'm not saying that's not the reason I didn't get it, but I've seen stuff on when oh I don't look like I'd be right for that at all.

You know who you would have been right for in that film?

Wanker Watson.

Was he in it?

His voice is in it because you know he did the interview.

Can't read Keen afterwards.

Oh, I didn't even Steve Watson.

Oh, Steve Watson.

Oh, you should have done.

Stephen Watson, you've.

Got the voice like.

We're here live at Windsor Park.

Let's say 3.

Yeah, I think it's voices in it rather than him.

Love that.

It's the finest impression.

Can I hear that again one more time?

We are live here at River Health for this All Star game.

All Star looking absolutely brilliant against LAD * that's good.

Live, live.

Lilo and Stitch like live.

Speaking of accents of films, have you seen that Nuremberg film about the Nuremberg film, obviously.

And Russell Cruz playing Herman Goering and he's doing the worst German accent ever.

So I am Herman Maximus, really.

90s Fitchenstein might.

Good movie though.

It is good, but you're also kind of watching it being like, I kind of like the guy.

That's the fucking weird bit about it and.

Then you watch the movie.

Yeah, but you're watching.

He's like, he's just, he's just a determined individual.

There's low, but like Marty Supreme.

I really want to see, I'm going to watch.

No, I'm.

Going to watch Marty Supreme, like someday maybe I'm going to watch out.

I think I really like the look of it.

Do you know what I've never seen a movies in?

I think I like Timothy Chalamy.

I think he's worthy, loud.

Like, yeah, I'd happily help him on the pot.

There's been a few times I forget who he is, and then I go, oh, that's Timothy Sholliver.

I keep getting mixed up with the guy that played Stephen Hawking.

Oh, Eddie.

Redman.

Yeah, I don't know why they don't have anything like no, but it's just.

Not even remotely I know.

What happens?

You get to my age, Matthew.

But have a wee similar head like.

Both swallow.

It was a blowjob joke wasn't very good over the tone.

Need to see there.

I'm sorry with that gentleman.

Sorry with that, sorry.

Right.

And Kylie Jenner, isn't he?

Like they're a loving relationship.

Matthew yes.

They're.

Right.

Yeah, that maybe comes as part of it.

Yeah, I saw the was it the Golden Globes just had.

Yeah.

And paper on me is the Leonardo Caprio had a conversation with somebody, but they caught him on.

But it's the way he's doing it everyone, there's hardly there's allegations that he's like gay and the way he's like sort of talking like the way that sort of one clip he does look comp.

It's like, it's like whatever we all pretend to be your maz.

I mean, you take her skin out of the grave, you walk.

With get her pants.

Making your mom's not dead.

Fuck.

Who's daddy's?

I have more.

Oh, they're mine.

Sorry, I thought it was just me naked.

I just learned like a corpse.

No, you don't.

Thank you, It's probably the nicest thing you've ever said.

You don't look like a corpse.

Jesus, thanks for helping try it, started my majority.

Great things, awful business like in that like Robin so I create Robin I.

Don't know.

We've taken.

It's not particularly nice either, like.

I know, but it's a trade like it's one of the oldest trades in the.

World, I would say they're gonna agree that already has somebody and it must fucking take some idea.

Well, you have to.

Be very careful that digger.

Yeah.

Well, in case you like, take an arm off or something.

Well, you know how.

It is you left the wee bit of the coffin or scraped.

What if you scraping the implant?

Off you go.

I don't even know if it's the right grave.

They don't.

Have a name plate on the coffin on the ground.

Do they?

Do I?

What's that?

For God.

I think you can see anyway.

No, that there wouldn't be a name plate on it.

I.

Think there's a name plate on top of the coffin?

Yeah, but the coffin dropped did.

They no, I guess the whole like the whole like, that's why they're too expensive.

It depends what modern ones you get.

Ones that are disposable.

My auntie's one definitely wasn't going to last too long.

That wasn't the Air 1.

I did the second lift and I won't when I was.

I guess it should.

Be MDF one it.

Was like a week flat pack we'd we'd have build it ourselves.

We got it from MF.

Eyes closed down with the proper up in the armchair.

I know the fees and structures and fucking German.

Why don't they make a matter like metal?

Why don't they?

Yeah.

Because you can't lift them.

Then oh fuck, well you can get something to.

I'd love to see know the big American ones with the big yeah, yeah, that led the ghosts like at the door indoor.

Oh nice, used to have bells, some coffins.

In case someone did, they woke up again.

Well, that happened to a woman in Oregon, famously, Margie McCall died once by twice, right?

Swear to fuck, you can Google this right now, right?

I think we've already Googled it.

There was a woman that it was I think the 1800 or something.

And she was back in the day.

They didn't have wax.

It was just fucking.

You were just buried out there and she dropped dead and she had a bit of money about her and gravediggers or robbers went in, fucking dug her body up and took this expensive ring off her finger.

And it turned that the ring was so tight and cut the blood flow off there and she just basically fainted.

But when they took the fucking ring off, it started her circulation again, Woke her up and she woke up and went back to the house and her husband was like, fuck, he's on the night and he's found the Xbox.

True story.

How long does she live for after?

Oh, years like.

There's ones who like get woke up and then they just die again straight away.

Her husband's got Pornhub going.

Oh, that's how I love the.

Old Pornhub.

It's a fellow drawn, and then here you are.

That's insane.

Yeah, do.

You know, like there's things that like dead bodies are escapes.

They they had to pretend to not be robbing her.

No love, we're just.

Making sure you're clear, I'm just giving you mouth to mouth.

I swear I'm not doing anything weird.

But the dead bodies like the fart and sometimes the air goes past the vocal cords and a dead body will go because I know a guy I swear to fuck.

I swear to God right now, I know a guy who's a forensic police officer and he he, I sort of, I swear to God, he's told me that we're like, he'll go into fucking like people dropped heads and you're sitting there that you know, the draw, the way you fucking outline in the body.

Take all these photos and he says like you'll just hear like a oh, I'll be going get back ahead and he's on his own.

That's fucking.

That's what a fart sounds like when it comes out of your mind.

Yeah, pretty much.

Like a haunting ghost.

So they'll fart and then, yeah, that the vocal cord just go.

And by the way, I was freedom, policemen have guns.

So I'd be like, fuck yeah.

It's like our policemen also have guns, by the way.

I don't just said he's.

Yeah.

I thought it was just straight and policeman.

I yeah, I wouldn't like digging graves like.

Digging them or robbing them?

Robbing them probably doesn't happen as much anymore, does it?

No, who's getting buried with like actual stuff on them?

My grandma got buried with our dog like well not the dog, like the live dog.

The dog was also dead in a wee box and we buried him with the dog.

That's nice.

And the late?

As he gets to heaven, Peter's like there's no dogs in Airman.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

No blacks, no dogs, no Irish.

Look on this like for fuck.

'S sake go rotten.

Dog just tied up outside heaven.

All these fucking bottles were holes in them.

I'm not looking up, I'm not looking up.

And he shake.

You come down.

Jesus go right, come pick it up.

Fuck sake.

Rude.

Too much, too much.

Sorry with that.

Eh, Denzi, what are you up to at the start of this year?

Are you still run?

Are you running, eh, wafflers and all that?

Kind of.

Stuff.

Yeah, we've we've rescheduled wafflers to the What date did I tell?

You have you done it?

The 10th Have you done it?

No, he's on the next one.

You'll love.

It I'm not important Mickey Andy ever on it should be hasn't done it next time.

But we're we're in the works for another big name.

So we are.

It's a chaos.

What's a big name?

Chaos is OK, really long.

Pontanzolomokiyuku used to play for Derby.

So get the name twice.

Yep, it might be do.

You think any other big names?

That guy plays with Burnley at the minute.

Leslie Akuchukui, a ghost just.

Started.

I swear to God, I got actually.

Is it?

Yeah.

Slothani, Bravich.

Somebody said it could chew to me at Kremlin one night.

I didn't.

Know where that was cool.

She went up.

The 10th of April I want to say or the.

15th.

That's ages away, one of them.

I know it was meant to be.

13th an accidentally.

Yeah, it was meant to be 13th February but was postponed it.

Valentine's Day.

Yeah, and the theme is still going to be love, but we're just going to play that in the April because we love April.

Yeah.

Who's she?

Anything.

Anything.

Kitchen Dog Podcast.

Yeah, Kitchen Talk podcast on Spotify and YouTube.

That's it.

Bartlett's on tour.

Always on tour, never author.

Open a cow shade.

Where will you have at this point still?

It's quite.

Last week of January.

Probably nearly finished, no.

So I'll be in Dublin on the 1st of February and then I'm in Glasgow and Liverpool, Edinburgh and Liverpool, then in Belfast.

I'm in Glasgow, then I'm in Derry, then I'm in London, then I'm in Newcastle.

Are you taking the car to all them bar London?

I'd fucking love to.

I can.

See that he loves getting the boat and.

Drive.

I would, I would.

My idea is that you should be, yeah.

Take the the car the boat to Liverpool and then drive from Liverpool to London.

And with the car long?

I know you don't.

I know you don't.

Want to use something the brunette?

I drive to the outskirts.

Movie London, you know, somewhere to Cardiff.

Get the Holyhead boat back.

I've never done the Liverpool boat, you know it's.

Class.

No, it's rough.

It's no, no, but here's here's a fucking we call saving tip for you, right?

Don't book a cabin overnight.

You do it on the day.

There's no there's a soft play area.

Bring a sleeping bag.

I just kept on the soft play.

With the kids.

No, they're away to bed.

If you're doing the overnight, they've gone to bed.

Man, we went to glass.

We eighteen of us slept in a soft player.

It was the best night to sleep over in my life.

I've.

Got all your mates.

Fucking unbelievable.

The cabin's like £50 by the way, you got a bed on the shore.

I put this in a soft play like.

You can go down to the soft play from the cabin.

Did you ever sleep on a slide?

Fucking luxurious.

Yeah, I've never.

It just faded like too long of a journey.

We, I, whenever I went to uni and Liverpool, my, I was driving over and all my driving the boat, no driving, driving the car onto the boat and all the, all my shit was just in the car.

So it was packed.

That was heavy.

And going up the ramp to get to the top deck.

My man just couldn't get the clutch to go.

She had to ask the wee one of the wee Polish guys working just come in and driving up the top of the boat.

What can you do?

What can you do?

I.

Didn't have a licence.

Fair, all right.

You would you would love it.

It's like being on a cruise.

You would hit it.

It's horrendous.

I love it it.

Doesn't look good.

I I but then I'm I.

Do I'll tell you what else is your on board.

A pub cinema.

A cinema can't.

Hear anything in the cinema?

Because right above the engine.

That's true.

You can't hear anything.

That's a good point.

Like.

Just all French island films, yeah.

What else is wrong in crisis?

There's week quizzes, there's like we've got touch screens in them now and it's like a week tablet and you can do all these quizzes like whatever we.

Come.

I remember though, there used to be the on the boat to Scotland, there was a Burger King on the fucking Stanley.

Oh, because it was the first time I ever had a Burger King.

There was and it was so popular it was class.

So why don't stop?

Don't know what Brexit probably.

Guys, I am the king now.

Thank you for Joel.

Thank you for joining me.

You're.

Talking.

I kept talking to me.

Would you like come for lunch?

I can't go to the gym.

Would you like come for?

Lunch.

I'd love to come for lunch.

You've changed.

Back in the old 7, back out.

It's beautiful to see.

I.

Don't want to leave you anymore if that's the way you're getting all.

I think we're to the geminal here.

You've lost them Injections.

Yeah.

You haven't looked at me the same sense.

Oh, you're old.

You're a tan again.

The laundry and the money I've spent is all you'd get me is neglect.

From negligees to neglah.

Are talking to other men their dogs?

What does that have?

A dog?

Boys, thank you.

Thank you.