1 00:00:05,123 --> 00:00:05,765 Yes. 2 00:00:05,765 --> 00:00:06,685 Hello. 3 00:00:07,904 --> 00:00:11,999 Well, Jasmine Crackett has announced a run for Senate. 4 00:00:11,999 --> 00:00:13,094 Uh-huh. 5 00:00:14,190 --> 00:00:14,989 Yeah. 6 00:00:14,989 --> 00:00:16,752 white women are starting. 7 00:00:16,752 --> 00:00:27,172 I saw you a video, you know how disconnected I am from like government stuff in general, but maybe you understand why a little bit now. 8 00:00:27,172 --> 00:00:28,084 Imagine. 9 00:00:28,084 --> 00:00:32,413 Yeah, white women and the nerve, they've got it. 10 00:00:33,478 --> 00:00:35,825 They've always got the nerve, I'll tell you that one. 11 00:00:35,825 --> 00:00:42,185 just watching a video from Dear Dean publishing on Instagram, who we've mentioned before on here. 12 00:00:42,185 --> 00:00:46,525 He's a black man with PhD and he just makes amazing videos. 13 00:00:46,525 --> 00:00:57,525 I don't think I know what his PhD is in, but he was saying, you know, do you remember how a few months ago, all of the Democrats were coming out for Jasmine Crockett? 14 00:00:57,525 --> 00:00:58,865 Like, this is what we need. 15 00:00:58,865 --> 00:01:00,185 This is the fight, right? 16 00:01:00,185 --> 00:01:01,305 She's standing up to him. 17 00:01:01,305 --> 00:01:02,524 She's showing up with facts. 18 00:01:02,524 --> 00:01:11,269 And he's like, now that she's announced to run, are we going to start hearing not her, not right now for some reason. 19 00:01:12,791 --> 00:01:19,466 And I had not posted a video for four minutes before, well, she voted for Israel. 20 00:01:19,466 --> 00:01:20,977 Yup, yup, yup. 21 00:01:20,977 --> 00:01:22,265 That's what, yeah, I saw that. 22 00:01:22,265 --> 00:01:22,867 oh 23 00:01:22,867 --> 00:01:24,423 I might lose my mind. 24 00:01:24,477 --> 00:01:24,953 like. 25 00:01:24,953 --> 00:01:31,124 I liked what I saw in your video saying like, government, like there's this. 26 00:01:31,124 --> 00:01:33,522 Her government supports Israel. 27 00:01:33,522 --> 00:01:38,686 And we have done since 1948. 28 00:01:38,925 --> 00:01:44,417 It's like pointing at an executive in a corporation and being like, she's a capitalist or like. 29 00:01:45,838 --> 00:01:48,852 It is coming from white women specifically. 30 00:01:48,946 --> 00:01:54,286 the military, they'll be like, but you served for whatever bad government. 31 00:01:54,287 --> 00:01:55,388 Okay. 32 00:01:55,449 --> 00:01:57,936 But that's why I understand it. 33 00:01:57,936 --> 00:01:59,716 what I'm saying, right? 34 00:01:59,716 --> 00:02:08,996 And I remember, and I liked it, what I did see you say was like, this is why Trump is president because of people like you. 35 00:02:09,276 --> 00:02:24,632 Like, it's not, and this is why it's so hard to speak out loud the things I think when white women are around, because it's not like, 36 00:02:24,632 --> 00:02:29,984 They're technically wrong about the thing, but it's like, why are you talking? 37 00:02:29,984 --> 00:02:31,696 Yeah. 38 00:02:31,696 --> 00:02:41,340 And I remember coming up and talking about the analogy when Kamala was running for president of saying, yeah, there's one kitchen in town and it's been run by this terrible, 39 00:02:41,340 --> 00:02:42,520 terrible industry. 40 00:02:42,520 --> 00:02:45,101 But everyone's going there and they're getting sick. 41 00:02:45,101 --> 00:02:52,016 I would rather a black woman be in charge over there, but that doesn't mean that the restaurant isn't still going to have problems and be 42 00:02:52,016 --> 00:02:52,456 Whatever. 43 00:02:52,456 --> 00:03:01,253 I would just rather a black woman have anything in a place, but I don't think these are good places for black women because I can't even imagine. 44 00:03:01,253 --> 00:03:02,606 can't even. 45 00:03:02,834 --> 00:03:03,447 Yeah. 46 00:03:03,447 --> 00:03:16,700 yeah, like she that's one of the reasons she has my respect is because she's so willing to just say what needs to be said and to kind of like dare him to come for her. 47 00:03:16,700 --> 00:03:18,302 Her ad was so amazing. 48 00:03:18,302 --> 00:03:22,265 Just like Donald Trump just talking about her can't. 49 00:03:22,579 --> 00:03:24,372 well, because she's black out loud too. 50 00:03:24,372 --> 00:03:29,662 She doesn't participate in respectability politics that much. 51 00:03:29,662 --> 00:03:31,425 mean, but you have to know that's the whole thing. 52 00:03:31,425 --> 00:03:35,000 That's what I think our politics is, is respectability politics. 53 00:03:35,373 --> 00:03:35,523 what. 54 00:03:35,523 --> 00:03:40,226 So what's bothering me here is that it's giving purity test. 55 00:03:40,226 --> 00:03:45,289 Like, because how many of our politicians have voted for Israel? 56 00:03:45,289 --> 00:03:45,619 Right? 57 00:03:45,619 --> 00:03:51,631 Like, we are a major, major partner of Israel, the United States government. 58 00:03:51,711 --> 00:03:52,181 Right? 59 00:03:52,181 --> 00:03:55,984 I mean, one of the things I even said in my video was like, we all pay taxes. 60 00:03:55,984 --> 00:03:59,975 And so we all support, right? 61 00:04:00,416 --> 00:04:03,697 But like, the system is bad. 62 00:04:04,077 --> 00:04:05,598 The system is bad. 63 00:04:05,598 --> 00:04:12,461 But unless we are going to all rise up and pull down the current system, who then? 64 00:04:12,461 --> 00:04:14,649 Who do we want in these places? 65 00:04:14,649 --> 00:04:27,718 but until white women specifically can see that who they question and when they choose to speak and make their declarations of who's good and who's bad is really interesting and 66 00:04:27,718 --> 00:04:30,760 why and when does this come about? 67 00:04:30,760 --> 00:04:32,081 When are you talking about this? 68 00:04:32,081 --> 00:04:35,194 And also what are you doing about police brutality? 69 00:04:35,194 --> 00:04:37,490 What are you doing about the things happening right here? 70 00:04:37,490 --> 00:04:39,365 Because I know she cares about that. 71 00:04:39,365 --> 00:04:39,776 Do you? 72 00:04:39,776 --> 00:04:43,327 Because you seem to care about things you can't touch. 73 00:04:43,327 --> 00:04:52,037 I'm still getting crap for saying that Graham Plattner shouldn't have a Senate seat because he had a Nazi tattoo for 18 years. 74 00:04:52,037 --> 00:04:53,419 And I got so much. 75 00:04:53,419 --> 00:04:54,801 Well, can't people change? 76 00:04:54,801 --> 00:04:57,443 It's like you said, it's the when are they talking about it? 77 00:04:57,443 --> 00:04:58,404 The why? 78 00:04:58,404 --> 00:05:00,846 Because I can only remember. 79 00:05:01,272 --> 00:05:06,600 talking about Israel with two politicians right now, Kamala and Jasmine Crockett. 80 00:05:06,600 --> 00:05:11,532 And I think it's interesting is because within the black community, we critique these things, right? 81 00:05:11,532 --> 00:05:13,732 We critique Beyonce for being a capitalist. 82 00:05:13,732 --> 00:05:15,453 We can have nuance in things. 83 00:05:15,453 --> 00:05:16,773 White people do not. 84 00:05:16,773 --> 00:05:20,474 White people say yes or no based on this thing. 85 00:05:20,914 --> 00:05:22,724 You are good or bad based on this thing. 86 00:05:22,724 --> 00:05:27,115 You exist entirely based on how I feel about you. 87 00:05:27,476 --> 00:05:29,048 And that's bad. 88 00:05:29,048 --> 00:05:30,988 That's no good. 89 00:05:31,194 --> 00:05:37,007 And that's a white thing to even have to say to you, it's bad or good, but what are you doing? 90 00:05:37,067 --> 00:05:39,288 This is how you're spending your energy. 91 00:05:39,409 --> 00:05:46,152 How is she spending her energy and you're spending your energy thinking about how you're bet you wouldn't do what you're doing. 92 00:05:46,152 --> 00:05:53,136 And I said this recently is like whiteness takes in information and they look at it with, well, I would do this. 93 00:05:53,136 --> 00:05:54,417 I wouldn't do this. 94 00:05:54,417 --> 00:05:56,228 Not, okay, this is happening. 95 00:05:56,228 --> 00:05:58,399 This is what this person is doing. 96 00:05:58,779 --> 00:05:59,839 That's it. 97 00:06:00,013 --> 00:06:01,553 Zoom out. 98 00:06:01,553 --> 00:06:03,276 Who cares about what you think? 99 00:06:03,276 --> 00:06:04,578 Whether it's valid or not. 100 00:06:04,578 --> 00:06:06,098 What's happening? 101 00:06:06,400 --> 00:06:08,322 What happens if you be quiet? 102 00:06:08,322 --> 00:06:08,812 I don't know. 103 00:06:08,812 --> 00:06:12,186 And it's making you be quiet about it. 104 00:06:12,186 --> 00:06:13,614 That's what they don't want. 105 00:06:13,614 --> 00:06:16,178 talking about Trump supporting Israel? 106 00:06:16,178 --> 00:06:17,559 It was only the black woman. 107 00:06:17,559 --> 00:06:19,431 It was only the black woman. 108 00:06:19,904 --> 00:06:21,445 And who is doing it? 109 00:06:21,846 --> 00:06:24,818 Because if it's a white woman, that matters. 110 00:06:24,818 --> 00:06:26,550 And that's why I say make it about your race. 111 00:06:26,550 --> 00:06:29,524 If it's a black woman, okay. 112 00:06:29,524 --> 00:06:30,756 not even the... 113 00:06:30,768 --> 00:06:31,929 Yeah, you're right. 114 00:06:31,929 --> 00:06:34,400 It's like, there's no ability to hold nuance. 115 00:06:34,400 --> 00:06:37,251 That's why I was like, no, it's giving it's giving purity tests. 116 00:06:37,251 --> 00:06:51,137 Like it's not let's have a larger discussion about how all of the politicians are forced in this crazy system that we have to make deals with each other to trade for votes and to 117 00:06:51,137 --> 00:06:53,159 make the best of bad systems. 118 00:06:53,159 --> 00:06:56,460 Instead, let's just be like, nope, not at all. 119 00:06:56,460 --> 00:06:58,801 um 120 00:06:59,270 --> 00:07:01,431 You be quiet about her, having hope, right? 121 00:07:01,431 --> 00:07:05,332 Cause what you're doing is saying, here's a positive thing that we could maybe do. 122 00:07:05,332 --> 00:07:08,053 And, and white women don't want to hear that right now. 123 00:07:08,073 --> 00:07:12,395 They want to hear, but I need to point someone in bad right now. 124 00:07:12,395 --> 00:07:13,815 Cause I feel bad. 125 00:07:13,975 --> 00:07:15,016 People need to be the reason. 126 00:07:15,016 --> 00:07:18,657 And you giving me a black woman, it makes me feel uncomfortable. 127 00:07:18,657 --> 00:07:21,908 So I need to, it's that know your place thing too. 128 00:07:21,908 --> 00:07:25,770 It's like, they have to be above her in some way. 129 00:07:25,770 --> 00:07:26,671 Why? 130 00:07:26,671 --> 00:07:35,714 You know, I don't like, don't, it matters that you're white and you're talking, you know, and you too, and you're using it positively and they don't like that. 131 00:07:35,714 --> 00:07:37,504 And that's why they're speaking up too. 132 00:07:37,504 --> 00:07:40,355 You know, it's why are they talking to whom and about what? 133 00:07:40,355 --> 00:07:41,725 And it's to you. 134 00:07:41,725 --> 00:07:53,301 And it's when you're talking about this and in this morally superior way and how dare you as a white person ever feel morally superior because you don't like Israel. 135 00:07:53,301 --> 00:07:57,072 That's easy to not like you don't have nothing. 136 00:07:57,172 --> 00:07:58,563 What are you doing about it? 137 00:07:58,563 --> 00:08:01,504 Condemning the people who do got it. 138 00:08:01,504 --> 00:08:02,335 Now what? 139 00:08:02,335 --> 00:08:03,455 Now what? 140 00:08:03,736 --> 00:08:13,898 You know, and I think you did point out that like Zionists just throwing the word out, it gives racist to me, like the way people throw it at people, white people weaponize this 141 00:08:13,898 --> 00:08:17,149 work, white people. 142 00:08:17,149 --> 00:08:20,314 specifically, I've I felt this in the beginning of 143 00:08:20,314 --> 00:08:24,709 white people getting into it, they used to just say Jewish as a replacement for Zionists. 144 00:08:24,709 --> 00:08:27,365 That made me so uncomfortable, obviously. 145 00:08:27,365 --> 00:08:40,605 just found out from Lizzie, who's my talent manager, that the term Zionist comes from after World War II, when Russia wanted to go back to their programs, know, programs 146 00:08:40,605 --> 00:08:48,865 against Jews and like persecuting Jews, but they couldn't, you couldn't say that because it was just after the Holocaust. 147 00:08:48,865 --> 00:08:51,745 So they started calling them Zionists. 148 00:08:51,745 --> 00:08:53,553 And so just like, 149 00:08:53,645 --> 00:08:55,587 Like that's why it's giving racist, right? 150 00:08:55,587 --> 00:09:00,030 Because that's where it comes from, where that term comes from. 151 00:09:00,451 --> 00:09:03,443 And I'm like, to me, it's also very different. 152 00:09:03,443 --> 00:09:19,126 Like, is she a Zionist or was she making a deal for something that, you know, like, I, I barely understand politics and I still know that there can be a huge difference between 153 00:09:19,126 --> 00:09:22,537 being a politician who like actively is supporting 154 00:09:22,537 --> 00:09:27,380 Israel and what they're doing over there and somebody that had to vote for something. 155 00:09:27,380 --> 00:09:33,983 And if it comes, if as far as my understanding, it's a belief system and it can change. 156 00:09:33,983 --> 00:09:37,245 So, so what are you doing yelling at everybody? 157 00:09:37,245 --> 00:09:41,547 You white people, how like, makes me heated. 158 00:09:41,547 --> 00:09:42,184 get mad. 159 00:09:42,184 --> 00:09:49,030 And as a black and Jewish woman talking to white women and for you to get up here and be like, well, they're Zionist. 160 00:09:49,310 --> 00:09:54,846 And, and now I, do you know that you're white? 161 00:09:54,846 --> 00:09:55,926 You're a white person. 162 00:09:55,926 --> 00:09:58,026 You have no idea how problematic you are. 163 00:09:58,026 --> 00:10:08,677 And to have such a moral high ground and a hard line about something you happen to also not be able to do anything about, because it's not happening in your neighborhood, that's, 164 00:10:08,677 --> 00:10:18,357 it's, I don't know how, I mean, I do know how, but I've also been looking at this angel tree stuff, like as a Jewish person, like looking at angels, I don't know the way white 165 00:10:18,357 --> 00:10:21,777 women speak about things. 166 00:10:21,853 --> 00:10:26,876 that can't speak for themselves, but then they happen to be human? 167 00:10:26,876 --> 00:10:29,808 know, like people who can't speak for themselves. 168 00:10:29,808 --> 00:10:31,589 Do they want you doing this? 169 00:10:31,589 --> 00:10:33,511 Is this how they want you spending your time? 170 00:10:33,511 --> 00:10:36,463 Making sure that you are keeping a list? 171 00:10:36,463 --> 00:10:36,964 You? 172 00:10:36,964 --> 00:10:39,485 Because what are you doing about it then? 173 00:10:39,580 --> 00:10:46,732 You know, I speak to my Jewish family and I was so grateful when I went over there and they were not Zionists. 174 00:10:46,773 --> 00:10:50,424 I was so, you don't know that I already got the battle a lot, right? 175 00:10:50,424 --> 00:10:53,075 Doing what I do and talking how I talk and all that stuff. 176 00:10:53,075 --> 00:10:55,036 And I'm like so grateful that they're not now. 177 00:10:55,036 --> 00:11:00,594 There are still problematic things because it uses the trauma of Jewish people and uses that as a weapon and stuff. 178 00:11:00,594 --> 00:11:07,460 So there's Jewish people who have misunderstanding of things that have been propagandized in a way, but then there's Christian Zionists. 179 00:11:07,460 --> 00:11:11,723 who just say, yeah, all Jewish people should go live over there. 180 00:11:11,723 --> 00:11:13,075 And that's different. 181 00:11:13,075 --> 00:11:17,084 They should all get out of America and go to where I agree with. 182 00:11:17,084 --> 00:11:19,090 Those are different. 183 00:11:19,090 --> 00:11:25,488 because then they believe Jesus will come back and then they can get their space travel. 184 00:11:25,721 --> 00:11:27,232 If you think it's a cult, right? 185 00:11:27,232 --> 00:11:27,843 Exactly. 186 00:11:27,843 --> 00:11:37,520 If you think that, then how dare you talk about them and to them like this, especially if I am talking to you about how you're being racist every day. 187 00:11:37,520 --> 00:11:48,508 And you're like, well, this black woman who's trying to do her best within the system that's actively harming her every day, she has done the things she has to do for that job. 188 00:11:48,508 --> 00:11:51,634 Like maybe, but shut up. 189 00:11:51,634 --> 00:11:54,025 Like, you're not using your time. 190 00:11:54,025 --> 00:11:59,377 The fact that you're speaking so confidently tells me so much. 191 00:11:59,518 --> 00:12:01,398 I don't care now. 192 00:12:01,398 --> 00:12:04,791 And now you got me rooting for the government? 193 00:12:04,791 --> 00:12:06,943 That is not what I'm here for. 194 00:12:06,943 --> 00:12:08,323 How dare you? 195 00:12:08,323 --> 00:12:11,164 Like you always, they always end up turning it back around. 196 00:12:11,164 --> 00:12:15,246 Where now you got me out here like, no, people in politics matter. 197 00:12:15,246 --> 00:12:16,928 I don't care about that stuff. 198 00:12:16,928 --> 00:12:18,771 You know I think it's made up. 199 00:12:18,898 --> 00:12:25,661 They keep doing this to me with the military, you know, or I'll be like, no, the military is not going to come take you over, stop it. 200 00:12:25,661 --> 00:12:27,666 And they'll be like, blah, blah, blah, bad stuff. 201 00:12:27,666 --> 00:12:30,487 super critical books about the military. 202 00:12:30,487 --> 00:12:35,690 Like, I, it is weird that y'all are making me like quote-unquote defend them. 203 00:12:35,690 --> 00:12:40,602 But it's like, I don't know, it's the purity politics of it all. 204 00:12:40,602 --> 00:12:41,667 I just can't. 205 00:12:41,667 --> 00:12:51,467 I'm so like, I think I have to come to terms with the fact that I'm a bit traumatized from white women. 206 00:12:51,467 --> 00:12:57,100 doing this, like, perform it like I'm not accustomed. 207 00:12:57,481 --> 00:13:05,457 This like, for the good of other people, I'm going to dehumanize you in the name of the worst things I can think of. 208 00:13:05,457 --> 00:13:10,380 The most like, it's genocide. 209 00:13:10,380 --> 00:13:15,983 I'm going to use that as my moral high ground. 210 00:13:16,375 --> 00:13:29,848 against you trying to do something about it also they're actually in the system that could do something about it and you're you what do you want for her to do explode it feels like 211 00:13:29,848 --> 00:13:35,542 that's they just want her to not exist and for you as a person to shut up about it 212 00:13:35,740 --> 00:13:39,021 But that's what I kind of responded with. 213 00:13:39,021 --> 00:13:42,243 I only put it on my TikTok because I didn't even want the Instagram drama. 214 00:13:42,243 --> 00:13:46,165 But I was just like, OK, so who who do you want? 215 00:13:46,165 --> 00:13:47,826 Who do you want that is so pure? 216 00:13:47,826 --> 00:13:53,186 That is also going to get in here and do this stuff, because you know what I know, you know what I know? 217 00:13:53,186 --> 00:13:57,317 I know Donald Trump doesn't have blackmail on Jasmine Crockett. 218 00:13:57,327 --> 00:14:02,991 And like, don't you want Jasmine Crockett to be in there to support whoever this perfect person is that you're gonna get? 219 00:14:02,991 --> 00:14:07,544 Or do you want that person to only have to deal with just, it's just this misery. 220 00:14:07,544 --> 00:14:08,879 That's what it is. 221 00:14:08,879 --> 00:14:17,664 that like to be able to critique the system, you have to have been in the system. 222 00:14:18,024 --> 00:14:23,000 And then they try to disqualify the critique because you've been in the system. 223 00:14:23,000 --> 00:14:26,778 And it gives similar to like when you would say like, she's just angry. 224 00:14:26,778 --> 00:14:27,158 Why? 225 00:14:27,158 --> 00:14:28,200 What's happened? 226 00:14:28,200 --> 00:14:28,839 What happened? 227 00:14:28,839 --> 00:14:37,671 know, this disqualifying because you qualify, because you have something to say you shouldn't be listened to. 228 00:14:37,671 --> 00:14:41,126 and end this like, what are you doing? 229 00:14:41,126 --> 00:14:45,923 And you're not helping the people who are actually going through this thing you're talking about. 230 00:14:45,923 --> 00:14:53,973 We could probably have done a lot more with listening to black women a long time ago. 231 00:14:54,174 --> 00:15:03,262 And there's also this like, you know, because, because they do this to me with like, well, why should we listen to you when you joined a fascist government to go fight and go 232 00:15:03,262 --> 00:15:04,693 overseas and blah, blah, blah. 233 00:15:04,693 --> 00:15:15,481 And I'm like, well, number one, you're listening to me as a 38 year old, I signed up for the military when I was 22. 234 00:15:15,481 --> 00:15:17,922 And let me tell you this huge secret. 235 00:15:17,922 --> 00:15:20,784 I did not know everything. 236 00:15:21,126 --> 00:15:24,678 about the military and the government when I was 22. 237 00:15:24,678 --> 00:15:33,923 And where I'm going with this is like, how do you think she knew that when she ran for Congress, she was gonna, she didn't know, right? 238 00:15:33,923 --> 00:15:43,309 So it's giving this very purity of like, you should have known everything, everything bad you were gonna be asked to do in this job beforehand. 239 00:15:43,309 --> 00:15:48,803 And no one can do these jobs with this kind of purity. 240 00:15:48,803 --> 00:15:52,079 idealism that we're getting to. 241 00:15:52,079 --> 00:15:57,960 And in the meantime, the Republicans are just walking in lockstep, doing all their hatred. 242 00:15:57,960 --> 00:16:01,322 This, the purity is for some. 243 00:16:01,562 --> 00:16:05,385 It's, it's, that's why I've always said like, when are you questioning? 244 00:16:05,385 --> 00:16:07,607 Who are you questioning and why? 245 00:16:07,607 --> 00:16:09,548 What is the purpose? 246 00:16:09,709 --> 00:16:10,940 What is your goal? 247 00:16:10,940 --> 00:16:17,044 Because that purity testing only comes around when you don't want to do something. 248 00:16:17,265 --> 00:16:19,187 Just say, don't wanna. 249 00:16:19,187 --> 00:16:20,390 Don't make it her. 250 00:16:20,390 --> 00:16:24,734 You have to find a reason that's in your goodness, which is why you don't want to. 251 00:16:24,734 --> 00:16:27,282 And it's because she supports Israel. 252 00:16:27,282 --> 00:16:31,515 Okay, are you gonna send her materials to watch it? 253 00:16:31,515 --> 00:16:39,919 what what else are you what and What else like and because if you don't then who else is gonna do it? 254 00:16:39,919 --> 00:16:41,059 Are they not supporting? 255 00:16:41,059 --> 00:16:48,562 It's replacing one brick with another I remember the Game of Thrones when they talked about the Iron Bank They were like, we must be able to talk to someone at the Iron Bank 256 00:16:48,562 --> 00:16:50,563 and they're like There's no someone. 257 00:16:50,563 --> 00:16:52,714 I mean, they just replaced that someone with another someone. 258 00:16:52,714 --> 00:16:55,449 It's one brick and you replace it with another brick 259 00:16:55,449 --> 00:16:57,692 And a black woman is not the same as every other brick. 260 00:16:57,692 --> 00:16:59,214 And that's why they didn't want us in there. 261 00:16:59,214 --> 00:17:02,498 But then we come and then they're like, you're not like every other. 262 00:17:02,498 --> 00:17:03,018 I don't know. 263 00:17:03,018 --> 00:17:04,920 They're like, you're not a brick. 264 00:17:05,001 --> 00:17:06,702 No, I'm not a brick. 265 00:17:06,983 --> 00:17:07,413 Sorry. 266 00:17:07,413 --> 00:17:08,677 I don't know what that was. 267 00:17:08,677 --> 00:17:12,829 know, there's so many things here where I think it's like... 268 00:17:12,829 --> 00:17:17,104 this is the closest we've been to America kind of being for everyone. 269 00:17:17,104 --> 00:17:20,005 And it really freaked people out. 270 00:17:20,340 --> 00:17:23,748 And like you said, the black woman brick doesn't fit. 271 00:17:23,748 --> 00:17:34,214 America, I forget who was talking about this, they're like, America's only made to sort of work with this powerful elite class, right? 272 00:17:34,214 --> 00:17:38,856 And kinda like a cult, it only works with an isolated perspective. 273 00:17:39,339 --> 00:17:40,182 Mm-hmm. 274 00:17:40,182 --> 00:17:49,212 you started opening things up and getting a non-isolated perspective, they knew it was trouble, right? 275 00:17:49,212 --> 00:17:56,671 But also, I'm sure you saw yesterday that it came out that white men have actually been the greatest recipient of DEI. 276 00:17:56,671 --> 00:18:02,655 sure like i don't know that i'm you didn't need to i didn't know that here yeah 277 00:18:02,655 --> 00:18:05,017 is down, college enrollment is down for white men. 278 00:18:05,017 --> 00:18:07,059 like JD Vance is the example. 279 00:18:07,059 --> 00:18:11,823 Like JD Vance got into Yale because he was a poor kid from Appalachia. 280 00:18:11,823 --> 00:18:16,166 And they wanted one of those to round out their applicants. 281 00:18:16,727 --> 00:18:17,224 Like 282 00:18:17,224 --> 00:18:23,089 it's always been pick and choose when these things and it always has been, right? 283 00:18:23,189 --> 00:18:25,772 I saw that up close in corporate America. 284 00:18:25,772 --> 00:18:27,183 I watched it happen. 285 00:18:27,183 --> 00:18:38,682 I watched EDI like become interesting for some and even still it was like, whatever, whatever, you know, like white women were always the top recipients before that. 286 00:18:38,682 --> 00:18:39,753 And now it's white men. 287 00:18:39,753 --> 00:18:43,666 Shocking, shocking, you know? 288 00:18:43,927 --> 00:18:44,328 Great. 289 00:18:44,328 --> 00:18:45,792 say we thought it was white women. 290 00:18:45,792 --> 00:18:46,555 Turns out it's... 291 00:18:46,555 --> 00:18:50,135 Well, and even when it is white women, it's still white men. 292 00:18:51,075 --> 00:18:52,435 Yeah, the same. 293 00:18:53,575 --> 00:18:54,515 Yeah. 294 00:18:55,058 --> 00:19:00,584 And so that perspective gets largen, enlargen, what's the word I'm looking for? 295 00:19:00,584 --> 00:19:02,707 And it doesn't work anymore. 296 00:19:02,707 --> 00:19:06,220 Someone starts asking, why Thomas Jefferson enslaved his own children? 297 00:19:06,220 --> 00:19:09,264 And all of a sudden they're like, uh-oh. 298 00:19:09,264 --> 00:19:16,784 You know, and it was funny, because I actually believed this story in the Army. 299 00:19:16,784 --> 00:19:27,344 Like I was told, so I came in through this college program, right, which is basically like, if you have a college degree, you can apply and get accepted to be an officer, 300 00:19:27,344 --> 00:19:27,564 right? 301 00:19:27,564 --> 00:19:31,404 The only requirement, the only hard and fast requirement is to have a college degree. 302 00:19:31,404 --> 00:19:39,202 And I was told that during my interview that like this was because the Army 303 00:19:39,202 --> 00:19:45,965 Otherwise, like you're coming into the culture pretty much as a 17 year old, 17, 18 year old, right? 304 00:19:45,965 --> 00:19:51,817 You're enlisting right out of high school or you're going into ROTC in college or West Point. 305 00:19:51,817 --> 00:19:57,820 So they wanted to get some people who had a little more outside perspective, right? 306 00:19:57,820 --> 00:20:00,592 And I actually believed that. 307 00:20:00,592 --> 00:20:06,988 And then I just got told, shut up and sit down, Lieutenant, forever, you know? 308 00:20:06,988 --> 00:20:07,706 Yeah. 309 00:20:07,706 --> 00:20:12,932 Obviously new people coming into a system ready to critique it are gonna be silly. 310 00:20:12,932 --> 00:20:25,907 But at the same time, like it doesn't take but one or two years in a totalizing system for you to lose that outside perspective completely. 311 00:20:26,288 --> 00:20:28,282 And now you're just in an echo chamber. 312 00:20:28,282 --> 00:20:40,850 Well, especially when you've been primed in your family is imagine, I imagine, you know, people whose families, military family, whatever, and like their whole community or they 313 00:20:40,850 --> 00:20:45,373 live in these towns where this is your identity. 314 00:20:45,614 --> 00:20:50,628 Sorry, but even in, don't think black communities that really exist as much, right? 315 00:20:50,628 --> 00:20:55,123 There, I know, sure there are black, like, whatever. 316 00:20:55,123 --> 00:21:02,531 But you know, there's honor and the like, but like it gives Christian, like, I don't know the outsiders. 317 00:21:02,531 --> 00:21:03,852 I don't think fields. 318 00:21:03,852 --> 00:21:13,551 I never, you know, I wasn't like, Ooh, I, know, I feel like there's this sense that inside you think people on the outside are looking at you like, wish I could. 319 00:21:13,551 --> 00:21:15,543 No, no, I don't know. 320 00:21:15,543 --> 00:21:18,215 I just, we're just looking. 321 00:21:18,463 --> 00:21:19,775 We're not admiring. 322 00:21:19,775 --> 00:21:21,386 I don't know. 323 00:21:21,386 --> 00:21:23,949 It just makes my shoulders go to my ears. 324 00:21:23,949 --> 00:21:25,220 It's so uncomfortable. 325 00:21:25,220 --> 00:21:33,794 And I understand where now, it's like, but I wanna know why, how, what's the pattern? 326 00:21:33,794 --> 00:21:35,035 How do we interrupt it? 327 00:21:35,035 --> 00:21:42,023 And I feel like in whiteness and in white women, all you wanna do is commiserate, point to what it is, and then go, aw. 328 00:21:42,023 --> 00:21:44,784 And then, and then anyone who goes, so what are we going to do about it? 329 00:21:44,784 --> 00:21:45,826 You yell at them. 330 00:21:45,826 --> 00:21:54,501 If, if they look like me, especially if we're like, all right, so who's cleaning up and they get real mad because I'm like, you're supposed to, I thought you were here to clean. 331 00:21:54,501 --> 00:21:57,895 I, you know, you want the mammy, there's no human. 332 00:21:57,895 --> 00:22:07,124 There's no context where you're looking at Jasmine Crockett in the in the racial lens with your thing because they'll say, I'm not racist. 333 00:22:07,124 --> 00:22:10,438 I just, you know, hate what's going on in Palestine. 334 00:22:10,438 --> 00:22:13,059 Both of those things can be, you could be both of those. 335 00:22:13,379 --> 00:22:15,780 You can be racist as you do that. 336 00:22:15,780 --> 00:22:26,815 You can weaponize your concern, which is one of my narratives of the nurse of narcissisms, which I've decided to go school at our systems and take the, you know, race is one of 337 00:22:26,815 --> 00:22:27,445 them. 338 00:22:27,445 --> 00:22:35,121 But to just weaponize something so terrible as you do something to someone trying. 339 00:22:35,421 --> 00:22:38,294 and then you see yourself as, and you're so smug. 340 00:22:38,755 --> 00:22:44,492 I think maybe that is also it, is this pat on the back and cheer with your friends because you're not that bad. 341 00:22:44,492 --> 00:22:45,740 I just don't. 342 00:22:45,740 --> 00:22:48,494 You could be doing so much with your voice and it's not that. 343 00:22:48,494 --> 00:22:49,880 just went through this. 344 00:22:49,912 --> 00:22:52,985 But you know, and so this is interesting. 345 00:22:52,985 --> 00:22:53,939 just like, it's... 346 00:22:53,939 --> 00:22:56,239 Yeah, I posted a video recently. 347 00:22:56,759 --> 00:22:58,559 Yeah, I posted a video recently, which was a clip. 348 00:22:58,559 --> 00:23:08,099 It was a clip of a live where I'm, that's why I said, maybe I am a little traumatized by the man versus bear thing or me just trying and just seeing the enormous demonization that 349 00:23:08,099 --> 00:23:09,679 came with it. 350 00:23:09,679 --> 00:23:16,099 But like, so I'm just talking about it as a clip of me saying like, I didn't know how bad you were until I started talking to you guys. 351 00:23:16,099 --> 00:23:19,139 Um, maybe joke like I'm just trying to help you people or whatever. 352 00:23:19,139 --> 00:23:20,059 Cause it's funny. 353 00:23:20,059 --> 00:23:23,659 And, and you know, black people thought Cyrus white women were going. 354 00:23:24,061 --> 00:23:30,817 So I don't know what we did this time, but I'm not surprised or like, I don't, and another person, I don't know what the context is here. 355 00:23:30,817 --> 00:23:40,794 there's, but like, do you think this isn't a continuous all the time state of issue, of being an issue with you? 356 00:23:41,075 --> 00:23:44,649 And I'm just saying like, what do you mean context? 357 00:23:44,649 --> 00:23:47,292 I'm talking about you, period. 358 00:23:47,380 --> 00:23:50,884 This was an instance, but it was like, I don't know. 359 00:23:50,884 --> 00:23:53,653 It's because it's like all the time. 360 00:23:53,653 --> 00:23:54,492 I only eat. 361 00:23:54,492 --> 00:24:00,037 You know, like I know the exhausting perspective, but like I get this from men, right? 362 00:24:00,037 --> 00:24:07,003 Or like one dude will imply that I'm wrong about something and then I'll just, some did to me the other day. 363 00:24:07,003 --> 00:24:08,624 And he's like, why are you so mad at me? 364 00:24:08,624 --> 00:24:11,707 And I was like, it's just, it's the sparkling massage. 365 00:24:11,707 --> 00:24:13,168 It's all the time. 366 00:24:13,168 --> 00:24:14,810 It's every day. 367 00:24:14,810 --> 00:24:20,521 And it's, I live with a male veteran with a beard and he doesn't get it. 368 00:24:20,521 --> 00:24:21,186 And 369 00:24:21,186 --> 00:24:31,251 I know that the individual dude doesn't understand what they're doing, but it's every day all the time. 370 00:24:31,251 --> 00:24:36,580 Yes, just because you asked the question, because you wouldn't have asked that question. 371 00:24:36,580 --> 00:24:40,988 and then they're like, whoa, and now you want me to feel what? 372 00:24:41,209 --> 00:24:42,741 Bad for you. 373 00:24:42,832 --> 00:24:43,833 You know? 374 00:24:43,833 --> 00:24:51,398 And it has been something I think it's like, cause then I got back to this thing where I'm like, what am I doing? 375 00:24:51,398 --> 00:24:53,205 Where am I? 376 00:24:53,205 --> 00:24:54,119 Who? 377 00:24:54,300 --> 00:24:57,061 And I've had to slow down and go, who am I talking to? 378 00:24:57,061 --> 00:24:58,662 Why am I talking? 379 00:24:58,762 --> 00:25:01,585 Because I got turned around. 380 00:25:01,585 --> 00:25:13,224 I got turned about by whatever in the white that goes on with you guys that gets you guys all spun up and worried about how people are perceiving you because that's what you, guess 381 00:25:13,224 --> 00:25:15,175 that's what you're doing to each other all the time. 382 00:25:15,175 --> 00:25:18,918 Policing and the purity testing and the policing and the period testing. 383 00:25:18,918 --> 00:25:23,611 And so now you're doing it, but I don't, I can't believe it. 384 00:25:23,912 --> 00:25:28,795 You, you're saying you acknowledge how terrible things are, how 385 00:25:28,837 --> 00:25:40,834 Disgusting me how and then you're policing how I feel about anything, anything with this, with the weight of children on your back. 386 00:25:40,834 --> 00:25:42,155 I don't know like this. 387 00:25:42,155 --> 00:25:43,067 I'm a mother. 388 00:25:43,067 --> 00:25:43,987 What? 389 00:25:43,987 --> 00:25:45,987 And that's why I start getting weird about the hoods. 390 00:25:45,987 --> 00:25:48,927 And I'm like, you have to know your hood is white. 391 00:25:48,927 --> 00:25:51,367 And I mean that in all the ways, right? 392 00:25:51,367 --> 00:25:59,967 You have to know when your mother hood is white, when you start talking about how you're a mother and you can't buy white, that's a white thing to do to me, at me. 393 00:25:59,967 --> 00:26:04,847 You don't know what black motherhood is like, but you're talking about motherhood. 394 00:26:05,207 --> 00:26:08,127 And you don't know why I would not be one. 395 00:26:08,527 --> 00:26:10,298 My journey is not your journey. 396 00:26:10,298 --> 00:26:13,259 Especially after I read all your purity weird purity books. 397 00:26:13,259 --> 00:26:15,300 It's just a completely different journey. 398 00:26:15,300 --> 00:26:20,554 Valid in both ways, but what messaging you receive, messaging I receive, not the same. 399 00:26:20,554 --> 00:26:21,835 So let's talk about that. 400 00:26:21,835 --> 00:26:24,787 But no, you want to tell me I'm a terrible person. 401 00:26:24,787 --> 00:26:26,148 Have you read the books? 402 00:26:26,148 --> 00:26:33,343 Because if anyone's gonna start with pointing terrible fingers, wash yours and then point them back at yourself. 403 00:26:33,343 --> 00:26:38,657 I just, I, you know, that's, I'm not gonna do the washing. 404 00:26:38,657 --> 00:26:41,650 But the way your time and energy is spent. 405 00:26:41,650 --> 00:26:42,451 matters. 406 00:26:42,451 --> 00:26:44,903 And it seems not to be put to good use. 407 00:26:44,903 --> 00:26:45,964 It just seems to be wasted. 408 00:26:45,964 --> 00:26:56,050 The ROI on how you're focusing on policing other people and polite policing, which is, I think, different from weaponized and weaponizing concern. 409 00:26:56,050 --> 00:27:03,924 I think I have them as different narratives of narcissisms because the polite policing and the, just asking a question. 410 00:27:04,005 --> 00:27:06,426 I know I was there. 411 00:27:06,436 --> 00:27:08,106 I asked nicely. 412 00:27:08,207 --> 00:27:14,179 That's a white lady thing I see in these Karen videos where like, I asked you nicely as if, so it's a demand now? 413 00:27:14,179 --> 00:27:15,880 Cause you asked nicely? 414 00:27:16,200 --> 00:27:17,901 You should have asked not nicely. 415 00:27:17,901 --> 00:27:19,939 I didn't tell you, had to ask me nicely. 416 00:27:19,939 --> 00:27:20,913 I didn't want it. 417 00:27:20,913 --> 00:27:24,374 But it's this thing that white women get to throw at you. 418 00:27:24,374 --> 00:27:28,635 I politely asked as they're giving you this energy. 419 00:27:28,635 --> 00:27:31,147 I politely asked you to move. 420 00:27:31,147 --> 00:27:34,827 Who are declaring niceness at, you know? 421 00:27:34,827 --> 00:27:42,458 I just, I, we're not having the same conversations that I thought we were having. 422 00:27:42,938 --> 00:27:44,998 We're not having conversations. 423 00:27:45,298 --> 00:27:55,849 White people are debating and not well, they're not even good at that because they think debate is fight and colonized conversation and when. 424 00:27:55,849 --> 00:28:00,472 and already come in with your side and win over. 425 00:28:00,472 --> 00:28:02,253 Win over, people. 426 00:28:02,694 --> 00:28:05,656 Win over the whatevers. 427 00:28:05,656 --> 00:28:06,569 Don't forget you're muted. 428 00:28:06,569 --> 00:28:07,158 You're muted. 429 00:28:07,158 --> 00:28:18,378 And this is like, I feel like there's this not understanding of like, we are here right now because of a very concerted effort. 430 00:28:18,378 --> 00:28:32,598 know, like we are in the game, the end game of like a 40 to 50 year strategy on the half of the Republicans and these, you know, extremists that have owned it at this end to take 431 00:28:32,598 --> 00:28:37,038 America away and make it, you know, only good for some elite. 432 00:28:37,073 --> 00:28:37,936 and 433 00:28:38,134 --> 00:28:48,861 I would say it's probably, I would say, take it back, you know, longer than that and return to its, you know, make America great again. 434 00:28:48,861 --> 00:28:51,466 I think they're being honest in their opinions. 435 00:28:51,466 --> 00:28:53,075 Slavery, good. 436 00:28:53,075 --> 00:28:54,506 so, right. 437 00:28:54,506 --> 00:29:01,243 And so this is like, one of my questions too is like, where, what, how are we fixing it? 438 00:29:01,243 --> 00:29:02,164 Right? 439 00:29:02,164 --> 00:29:11,891 Look, what's becoming pretty obvious is that since end game is a chess term, the Republicans don't, they don't know what they're doing right now. 440 00:29:11,891 --> 00:29:14,693 Everyone kind of expected, yeah. 441 00:29:15,174 --> 00:29:15,773 When you're like. 442 00:29:15,773 --> 00:29:18,075 end game is a chess term? 443 00:29:19,277 --> 00:29:22,061 I hate end games and chess. 444 00:29:22,061 --> 00:29:22,582 Sorry. 445 00:29:22,582 --> 00:29:24,454 I just decided I hate it actually. 446 00:29:24,454 --> 00:29:25,735 So go ahead. 447 00:29:25,735 --> 00:29:26,501 Keep saying. 448 00:29:26,501 --> 00:29:32,614 there's this funny thing where like, I'm not great at chess because I lose my head, right? 449 00:29:32,614 --> 00:29:35,385 And I like actually make bad moves. 450 00:29:35,385 --> 00:29:42,227 My husband, no, but, but, I was educated on chess, right? 451 00:29:42,227 --> 00:29:48,069 Like I was kind of like formally educated on chess when I was in college on this chess team. 452 00:29:48,090 --> 00:29:54,470 And so sometimes I'll play with my husband and now my kid is getting into it, but he'll 453 00:29:54,470 --> 00:30:03,226 He'll be winning, he'll have all the power pieces, but he doesn't actually know how to finish the end game, right? 454 00:30:03,226 --> 00:30:09,930 Because that's an important part of the skill to develop is like how to do the checkmates in the end. 455 00:30:10,250 --> 00:30:15,423 So this is kind of what's happening sort of with politics right now. 456 00:30:15,423 --> 00:30:20,446 It's like the Republicans, they don't know how to do all the things that they wanna do. 457 00:30:20,446 --> 00:30:22,995 Everyone expected them to be better at. 458 00:30:22,995 --> 00:30:24,077 wreaking havoc. 459 00:30:24,077 --> 00:30:32,515 But the Democrat, but, but, but, but on the other side, what are we going to do about it? 460 00:30:32,515 --> 00:30:33,035 Right? 461 00:30:33,035 --> 00:30:35,057 Like they're failing. 462 00:30:35,057 --> 00:30:37,260 So what is the America we imagine? 463 00:30:37,260 --> 00:30:42,475 And as I've been saying for two years now, who are the leaders? 464 00:30:42,475 --> 00:30:55,315 Because as far as I can tell, Jasmine Crockett is one of the only leaders I can identify on the other side who has been consistently standing up to the tyrant and stating facts 465 00:30:55,315 --> 00:31:01,166 and speaking out for the people and like didn't change her tune at all when he got elected. 466 00:31:01,166 --> 00:31:04,449 Yeah, but white women, it's white women. 467 00:31:04,449 --> 00:31:07,850 You know, it's why it's very clear. 468 00:31:08,050 --> 00:31:09,481 Like that was a clear thing, right? 469 00:31:09,481 --> 00:31:11,852 You know, that is a stir. 470 00:31:11,852 --> 00:31:22,204 Jasmine Crockett is a sturdy choice in terms of remember, we talked about friend groups versus a group of friends and who who is accountable to what Jasmine Crockett is clearly 471 00:31:22,204 --> 00:31:23,815 accountable to the black community. 472 00:31:23,815 --> 00:31:24,555 She must be. 473 00:31:24,555 --> 00:31:25,856 We are the we are. 474 00:31:25,856 --> 00:31:27,167 She is, you know. 475 00:31:27,167 --> 00:31:32,712 So there's only so much meddling around in the BS that she can, I see her doing. 476 00:31:32,712 --> 00:31:34,053 Now I could be wrong. 477 00:31:34,053 --> 00:31:36,224 I just know that's an easy choice for me. 478 00:31:36,224 --> 00:31:38,415 She stick to her loud blackness. 479 00:31:38,415 --> 00:31:41,637 don't, that's a choice that tells me a lot, right? 480 00:31:41,637 --> 00:31:42,338 Done. 481 00:31:42,338 --> 00:31:45,070 Now, if someone doesn't see that as a strength. 482 00:31:45,070 --> 00:31:47,450 That's what white women need to talk about. 483 00:31:47,451 --> 00:31:49,691 That, cause that is one plus one equals two. 484 00:31:49,691 --> 00:32:02,438 And you coming in going, I don't know that whatever makes men mansplain white women, whitesplain that whatever that is that makes it's delusion. 485 00:32:02,758 --> 00:32:07,370 And when you talk about end games and stuff, it's like, no, they're, they need the persecution. 486 00:32:07,370 --> 00:32:10,741 They need to feel, they don't care about winning. 487 00:32:10,741 --> 00:32:12,561 Win what they like. 488 00:32:12,561 --> 00:32:14,665 playing Monopoly and watching you suffer. 489 00:32:14,665 --> 00:32:16,849 They don't want the game to end. 490 00:32:16,849 --> 00:32:18,521 They like watching you suffer. 491 00:32:18,521 --> 00:32:19,774 like winning. 492 00:32:19,774 --> 00:32:20,986 It's an action winning. 493 00:32:20,986 --> 00:32:22,358 They like seeking it. 494 00:32:22,358 --> 00:32:23,979 They don't want to finish. 495 00:32:23,979 --> 00:32:28,643 also a bad analogy, because there's not going to be one move here. 496 00:32:28,744 --> 00:32:31,227 And then it's over. 497 00:32:31,227 --> 00:32:33,288 And that's how people act. 498 00:32:34,035 --> 00:32:37,173 Like, some people are gonna like, are we going to survive this? 499 00:32:37,173 --> 00:32:42,198 No, I think 360 million people are going to spontaneously combust like, 500 00:32:42,449 --> 00:32:43,410 What do they mean? 501 00:32:43,410 --> 00:32:47,193 I think that's cult identification with America to me. 502 00:32:47,193 --> 00:32:54,239 Like you have to be okay with the idea that America is a concept and an organization and a business that could dissolve. 503 00:32:54,940 --> 00:32:56,901 And nothing would actually change. 504 00:32:58,083 --> 00:33:00,794 Like we would just agree different things. 505 00:33:00,794 --> 00:33:08,839 that's why it's giving rapture psychology, because it is very just one thing's going to happen and it's all going to be over. 506 00:33:08,839 --> 00:33:19,328 And to me, it's just been very privileged from the beginning of like, so many white Americans have never imagined having a president in the office that just didn't 507 00:33:19,328 --> 00:33:27,464 care, didn't care and was just going to be outwardly greedy and, you know, kleptocratic. 508 00:33:27,464 --> 00:33:27,844 Right. 509 00:33:27,844 --> 00:33:30,205 They didn't see what was going on clearly. 510 00:33:30,205 --> 00:33:37,198 They're following, believing in a system more than what you are seeing and the fact that people are people. 511 00:33:37,198 --> 00:33:41,460 They don't embody positions once they take office. 512 00:33:41,560 --> 00:33:42,761 They are still people. 513 00:33:42,761 --> 00:33:51,176 That man named whatever is still that man named whatever just because he's officer, senator, whatever now. 514 00:33:51,176 --> 00:33:54,921 But see, that's because you don't see the accountability because they're just doing their job. 515 00:33:54,921 --> 00:33:56,702 Black people don't act like that. 516 00:33:56,702 --> 00:34:03,903 But also when we get fired from a job, it's not as devastating or identity, you know, being fired. 517 00:34:03,903 --> 00:34:05,934 Yeah, because I acted like the job was a job. 518 00:34:05,934 --> 00:34:07,464 You know, there's just less. 519 00:34:07,464 --> 00:34:16,358 That's that anti identification, which is another narrative and also romanticizing the ends is another narrative because looking for the end, are we going to survive? 520 00:34:16,358 --> 00:34:18,258 Now you're doing the same thing. 521 00:34:18,679 --> 00:34:21,800 You're in the game going, I'm just maybe I can get out. 522 00:34:21,800 --> 00:34:23,681 You're gambling on the monopoly. 523 00:34:23,681 --> 00:34:26,152 Get up from the table. 524 00:34:26,233 --> 00:34:28,354 Walk out the house. 525 00:34:28,354 --> 00:34:29,455 Look around. 526 00:34:29,455 --> 00:34:31,056 Has anything changed? 527 00:34:31,056 --> 00:34:33,508 You just lost that monopoly by walking away. 528 00:34:33,508 --> 00:34:34,698 What happened? 529 00:34:35,139 --> 00:34:35,609 It's fine. 530 00:34:35,609 --> 00:34:36,830 You were going to lose anyway. 531 00:34:36,830 --> 00:34:38,421 It's a terrible game. 532 00:34:38,421 --> 00:34:40,563 The game was meant as a cautionary tale. 533 00:34:40,563 --> 00:34:44,025 You took like, we're not, okay, I'm not going to do it again. 534 00:34:44,105 --> 00:34:49,028 But someone had even said that the fairy tales, like fairy tales were created as cautionary tales. 535 00:34:49,449 --> 00:34:50,330 That's another tale. 536 00:34:50,330 --> 00:34:53,001 There's tattletales, cautionary tales. 537 00:34:53,144 --> 00:34:55,406 uh fairy tales, dragon tales. 538 00:34:55,406 --> 00:35:01,087 But like, we just, my, oh, then there's those tales. 539 00:35:01,087 --> 00:35:03,328 I say, bail on the tail, chasing your tail. 540 00:35:03,328 --> 00:35:07,228 There's a whole bunch of tales going on that we could stop. 541 00:35:07,369 --> 00:35:11,411 We could just open, walk outside, live our lives. 542 00:35:11,411 --> 00:35:17,052 But it also said like, it's this whole dream thing, this American dream. 543 00:35:17,052 --> 00:35:21,434 If you are, if your dreams are coming true, you're probably asleep. 544 00:35:21,434 --> 00:35:23,814 And that's something you're gonna wake up. 545 00:35:23,814 --> 00:35:25,374 That's what I think happens at the end. 546 00:35:25,374 --> 00:35:27,574 think that America survives. 547 00:35:27,574 --> 00:35:30,194 I mean, doesn't survive when the dream is over. 548 00:35:30,194 --> 00:35:31,674 Dude, woke up from the American dream. 549 00:35:31,674 --> 00:35:33,014 Wake up. 550 00:35:33,014 --> 00:35:33,954 Slavery. 551 00:35:33,954 --> 00:35:34,394 Ha ha. 552 00:35:34,394 --> 00:35:35,074 Remember? 553 00:35:35,074 --> 00:35:36,214 That just happened. 554 00:35:36,214 --> 00:35:38,254 It literally just happened. 555 00:35:38,494 --> 00:35:40,294 You can't, like it was so long ago. 556 00:35:40,294 --> 00:35:46,654 That's like when a guy cheats on you and it's like, well, I, it was three months ago. 557 00:35:46,714 --> 00:35:51,512 I used to do it every week and it's been three months. 558 00:35:51,512 --> 00:35:52,324 since I've cheated. 559 00:35:52,324 --> 00:35:55,290 like you wouldn't, that ends it all with the progress and the. 560 00:35:55,290 --> 00:36:00,156 It's so frustrating because it's like, it's, it's the belief system. 561 00:36:00,156 --> 00:36:01,589 It's that you believed. 562 00:36:01,589 --> 00:36:07,094 the system was built for you because it was quote unquote, but it was built for itself. 563 00:36:07,410 --> 00:36:08,656 You're still muted. 564 00:36:08,656 --> 00:36:15,320 But yeah, it was built for you, only like for you as in for you to do the work for us. 565 00:36:15,761 --> 00:36:20,686 You said with the elite group at the top, it was always built by the people who built it, who founded it. 566 00:36:20,686 --> 00:36:21,787 founded it. 567 00:36:21,787 --> 00:36:25,419 It's not even, like I said, it's not even a sentence that makes sense. 568 00:36:25,653 --> 00:36:28,395 They said, we found this land. 569 00:36:28,596 --> 00:36:30,309 We founded this company. 570 00:36:30,309 --> 00:36:32,291 They didn't even come up with a good word. 571 00:36:34,876 --> 00:36:37,126 We founded it, the founders. 572 00:36:37,126 --> 00:36:39,947 Yeah, the exceptionalism is something else. 573 00:36:39,947 --> 00:36:50,630 it, you know, in cults, I will never forget reading and it was in the one cult book that I know of written by a black cult expert, Ted Patrick. 574 00:36:50,630 --> 00:37:02,252 And he says, you know, in the 70s, he says, it occurs to me that of all the cults I have seen, women and children are always a slave class or servant class. 575 00:37:03,213 --> 00:37:04,424 And like, 576 00:37:04,424 --> 00:37:07,986 As soon as I read that, I was like, yeah, of course. 577 00:37:07,986 --> 00:37:14,249 But the women that think that it benefits them, right? 578 00:37:14,249 --> 00:37:24,465 And always, you know, when I explain this to people, it's like, well, part of it is because women are so overworked in patriarchal society and are already a servant class in 579 00:37:24,465 --> 00:37:27,967 patriarchal society and are isolated from each other. 580 00:37:27,967 --> 00:37:33,900 So it feels great to stand around in the kitchen and all be working together. 581 00:37:34,000 --> 00:37:43,826 and you're working together and you're focusing on how great it feels to be working together and you don't realize how much work you're doing and that you know all of the men 582 00:37:43,826 --> 00:37:47,448 are sitting down there waiting for you to serve them. 583 00:37:47,852 --> 00:37:55,679 if you're doing that part, if you are communing and sit in the kitchen working together, then maybe you will though. 584 00:37:55,679 --> 00:37:57,401 I don't think that that's what's happening though. 585 00:37:57,401 --> 00:38:02,806 I don't think white women, like you said, they're isolated from each other and when they talk, they're not really talking. 586 00:38:02,806 --> 00:38:12,996 I realized that all of that small talk and all the agreeing and having, like I said, friend group and maintaining the friend group and feeling like stuck in a. 587 00:38:12,996 --> 00:38:21,233 even toxic system there where you're surveilling each other a little bit or like you don't want to be isolated from the kitchen thing because that's the only time you guys get 588 00:38:21,233 --> 00:38:21,793 together. 589 00:38:21,793 --> 00:38:32,082 And if one of the people who host it isn't you got to you know if it's so restricted that way where that's the only time you get to be in community. 590 00:38:32,082 --> 00:38:39,222 and that's a big part of it is they let the women get together once in a while so that they have that thing to look forward to. 591 00:38:39,222 --> 00:38:39,663 Right. 592 00:38:39,663 --> 00:38:41,204 Yeah, exactly. 593 00:38:41,204 --> 00:38:47,727 And I feel like, but it's like forced fun or, and it's similar with the angel tree thing. 594 00:38:47,727 --> 00:38:54,932 I'm like, I keep going back to it just because, so if people don't know, I don't know if everyone just knows what an angel tree is, but it's like, you go to the store. 595 00:38:54,932 --> 00:39:01,956 I guess Walmart does them and it's a tree with people who can't afford their own Christmas. 596 00:39:01,956 --> 00:39:04,125 So you can pick a child. 597 00:39:04,125 --> 00:39:07,468 off the tree and then get the things on the list. 598 00:39:07,468 --> 00:39:10,831 And it seems like every year it gets online, you know, there's debacle. 599 00:39:10,831 --> 00:39:18,961 There's like people aren't grateful they didn't get what was or people pick it off and make a content creators make a performance out of going and buying the stuff. 600 00:39:18,961 --> 00:39:21,859 I'm going to give these kids Christmas this get. 601 00:39:22,020 --> 00:39:28,705 And I've been I just watched the kind of like compilation of the TikTok conversation around it as a non Christian. 602 00:39:28,705 --> 00:39:31,848 I'm just like, wait, this was Christmas the whole time for you guys. 603 00:39:31,848 --> 00:39:33,965 It was just it was just the gifts. 604 00:39:33,965 --> 00:39:39,185 I know you, I knew you came back with gifts, but it seems like that's the whole thing. 605 00:39:39,185 --> 00:39:42,084 And it's like, we're going to build this memory for them. 606 00:39:42,084 --> 00:39:45,005 like, how, how dare you? 607 00:39:45,005 --> 00:39:49,025 Someone threw out one of the kids angel tree things. 608 00:39:49,025 --> 00:39:58,625 And so someone found it in the garbage and said, someone picked it up and now this kid is going to, and then, and they're getting emotional about someone not getting a Christmas or 609 00:39:58,625 --> 00:40:00,045 I want to get two kids. 610 00:40:00,045 --> 00:40:00,945 I don't know. 611 00:40:00,945 --> 00:40:03,909 It just, the box. 612 00:40:04,149 --> 00:40:06,771 Is it Christmas if no gifts exist? 613 00:40:06,771 --> 00:40:16,040 if there literally is just the boxes of the stuff and also by the way Jesus's birthday, but not technically his birthday, but like it was his birthday. 614 00:40:16,040 --> 00:40:18,261 So Santa. 615 00:40:18,802 --> 00:40:20,934 Lifts good and bad. 616 00:40:20,934 --> 00:40:21,655 Gifts. 617 00:40:21,655 --> 00:40:24,798 deserves a Christmas every year. 618 00:40:24,798 --> 00:40:26,258 The stress. 619 00:40:26,439 --> 00:40:30,382 I remember participating in Christmas in like high school and I felt very stressed. 620 00:40:30,382 --> 00:40:34,465 All the group of girls that like allowed me to be friends with them and they were like, who's getting what? 621 00:40:34,465 --> 00:40:35,626 They were like, are you getting me stuff? 622 00:40:35,626 --> 00:40:37,507 I was like, yes. 623 00:40:37,608 --> 00:40:39,529 And then they, it was very intense. 624 00:40:39,529 --> 00:40:40,100 I don't know. 625 00:40:40,100 --> 00:40:43,904 It just was all buying things that the bath and body works mostly. 626 00:40:43,904 --> 00:40:44,355 But. 627 00:40:44,355 --> 00:40:49,520 Yeah, I have such issues with American gift giving culture. 628 00:40:49,520 --> 00:40:57,768 mean, it like the first time I was at an American Christmas, I was just like, because I thought it was like a gift. 629 00:40:57,768 --> 00:41:01,049 I thought they would get like, I you get all gift. 630 00:41:01,491 --> 00:41:03,653 And it was just boxes. 631 00:41:03,653 --> 00:41:05,845 And no, I mean, I was at 632 00:41:06,243 --> 00:41:08,346 You know, it was like the bad guy I married, right? 633 00:41:08,346 --> 00:41:14,545 But it was like, so it was like a 20 year old kid and his two parents and there was like 70 things. 634 00:41:14,545 --> 00:41:21,113 You know, and I just didn't even know how to like, comprehend. 635 00:41:21,113 --> 00:41:22,856 um 636 00:41:22,856 --> 00:41:36,726 and the performance, because I remember my brother, he was dating into a family that was like, now sit down and everyone opens and we watch everyone open the gift. 637 00:41:36,726 --> 00:41:39,397 that sounds terrible. 638 00:41:39,397 --> 00:41:40,769 That sounds terrible. 639 00:41:40,769 --> 00:41:46,993 And like the gratitude performance, and you know, like I complain about gift horse stuff and don't look a gift horse in the mouth. 640 00:41:46,993 --> 00:41:49,986 Don't tell me what to do, you know, because. 641 00:41:49,986 --> 00:41:53,297 Now we all have to pretend that this gift isn't really inconsiderate. 642 00:41:53,297 --> 00:41:54,917 You all know I don't like chocolate. 643 00:41:54,917 --> 00:41:59,999 Now this is a big box of fancy European chocolates and I'm supposed to go, thank you. 644 00:41:59,999 --> 00:42:03,020 That was a corporate trauma thing. 645 00:42:03,020 --> 00:42:07,001 It's like right at the end, why are you sending me pictures of you and your kids either? 646 00:42:07,001 --> 00:42:08,581 Like that's weird. 647 00:42:08,581 --> 00:42:10,444 Christmas, why do I? 648 00:42:10,444 --> 00:42:12,745 I think that you guys should stop it. 649 00:42:12,745 --> 00:42:16,286 But like the energy spent on that is crazy. 650 00:42:16,891 --> 00:42:18,711 I saw a thread last year. 651 00:42:18,711 --> 00:42:27,131 It was like, now it's January, the time I have to throw a bunch of pictures of people's children into the trash can. 652 00:42:27,315 --> 00:42:28,936 I'm a bad person, right? 653 00:42:28,936 --> 00:42:32,859 No, I'm a bad person because I'm looking at these little kids I'll never meet, don't want to. 654 00:42:32,859 --> 00:42:36,642 And now I feel bad because I don't want to, I don't care about, I actually hate your dad a little bit. 655 00:42:36,642 --> 00:42:42,346 Your dad's been a piece of, I don't, sorry, garbage. 656 00:42:42,407 --> 00:42:43,968 He gave me chocolates. 657 00:42:43,968 --> 00:42:45,149 Why did give me chocolates? 658 00:42:45,149 --> 00:42:47,440 Everyone knows I want to like chocolate. 659 00:42:48,072 --> 00:42:52,547 And here's the thing, like, I actually think it ruins gift giving. 660 00:42:52,547 --> 00:43:00,034 You know, like, I think one of the greatest thing is getting presents. 661 00:43:00,034 --> 00:43:03,918 The only thing I like better than getting presents is giving presents. 662 00:43:03,918 --> 00:43:08,222 Okay, so like, both of these things are amazing for me. 663 00:43:08,222 --> 00:43:10,616 But I don't like the trading. 664 00:43:10,616 --> 00:43:12,968 Why are we just trading presents of eagles? 665 00:43:12,968 --> 00:43:14,980 There's all these rules, right? 666 00:43:14,980 --> 00:43:23,407 Like if I get you a present and then you get me a present that's three times as expensive, somehow you are supposed to feel bad. 667 00:43:23,407 --> 00:43:25,849 But then I'm also supposed to feel bad. 668 00:43:25,849 --> 00:43:37,059 And so we're actually, I literally in college, I asked my girlfriends, I was like, can we just stop trading around the same Victoria's Secret gift card for birthdays? 669 00:43:37,059 --> 00:43:38,980 Like I don't. 670 00:43:39,500 --> 00:43:45,968 I am the type of person that if I see something and it makes me think of you, I want to buy it and send it to you. 671 00:43:46,227 --> 00:43:54,627 We did talk about this, because I remember you telling me about the stone, the stone penis or something that we talked about. 672 00:43:54,627 --> 00:44:03,106 Because I, but I also remember like the there's the, so someone recently I had, I went online to ask the white people, because I said, this is a very white people thing. 673 00:44:03,507 --> 00:44:09,807 One of my neighbors down the hall gifted Fran an advent calendar from her dog. 674 00:44:09,807 --> 00:44:11,587 And I was like, well, that's it. 675 00:44:11,587 --> 00:44:15,147 Cause you know, we walk, we have to walk past her thing to see, to go to the elevator. 676 00:44:15,147 --> 00:44:16,398 So I was like, 677 00:44:16,398 --> 00:44:17,608 this is great. 678 00:44:17,608 --> 00:44:23,311 And then maybe like two minutes later, I'm freaking out because I'm like, what do I do now? 679 00:44:23,311 --> 00:44:27,692 I don't know what to do now because now I'm a terrible person because I'm not going to respond appropriately. 680 00:44:27,692 --> 00:44:39,026 don't have to, I'm not, I have a lot of thank you card, like demand avoidance stuff where it's like, I'm supposed to batch out gratitude in this weird word format and like pretend 681 00:44:39,026 --> 00:44:41,246 this is a natural thing for me to do. 682 00:44:41,246 --> 00:44:42,607 Not good at it. 683 00:44:42,607 --> 00:44:44,167 And so I went live and 684 00:44:44,329 --> 00:44:51,345 And this was like, I think around my birthday time, because my birthday sleep has, and it was just nice to realize like, this is not just me. 685 00:44:51,566 --> 00:45:02,214 A lot of us have this presence that the and I have it up here, like this demand for gratitude, because it's rule bound, it's obligatory. 686 00:45:02,395 --> 00:45:11,603 It was very cute until I started getting all the like trauma from back when in my ear of like, well, they're going to hate you now because you're not going to. 687 00:45:11,935 --> 00:45:13,866 Yeah, you're not going to respond appropriately. 688 00:45:13,866 --> 00:45:19,351 And they're going to be like, that's that bitch didn't send anything back from my dog to do that. 689 00:45:19,351 --> 00:45:20,421 don't even know. 690 00:45:20,421 --> 00:45:22,203 And they're not thinking that right. 691 00:45:22,203 --> 00:45:25,295 That's a me thing, but that's whiteness. 692 00:45:25,295 --> 00:45:32,802 That's like that performance and narcissistic stuff of like, there are grand gestures are good. 693 00:45:32,802 --> 00:45:33,562 Period. 694 00:45:33,562 --> 00:45:35,183 Someone does a lot for you. 695 00:45:35,183 --> 00:45:36,404 That is good. 696 00:45:36,536 --> 00:45:41,896 Um, despite the fact, like, especially with men, I just found this, like, it wasn't even an analogy. 697 00:45:41,896 --> 00:45:42,496 It was real. 698 00:45:42,496 --> 00:45:45,656 If they would build stuff wrong. 699 00:45:45,716 --> 00:45:48,276 And now I am an asshole. 700 00:45:48,276 --> 00:45:53,416 If I want it, I don't even want you to do it because you won't follow the instructions. 701 00:45:53,416 --> 00:45:57,999 And I got a wonky chair that doesn't go up and down because you were just like, it's fine. 702 00:45:57,999 --> 00:45:58,477 No. 703 00:45:58,477 --> 00:46:07,602 this when I was trying to build my brand and like the entrepreneurship world and like, you know, someone offers to make you a website, but then it's like, but then you can't be 704 00:46:07,602 --> 00:46:09,373 like, I don't like this. 705 00:46:09,373 --> 00:46:10,323 I don't want this. 706 00:46:10,323 --> 00:46:11,645 When are you going to be done? 707 00:46:11,645 --> 00:46:14,937 And as soon as I could, I got to the point over. 708 00:46:14,937 --> 00:46:18,478 was like, no, I'll just pay some, you know, I will just pay you to do it. 709 00:46:18,478 --> 00:46:20,800 And that doesn't 710 00:46:21,070 --> 00:46:22,104 Take away from it. 711 00:46:22,104 --> 00:46:26,594 I think it just makes it easier for us to get what we want, you know, and have like... 712 00:46:26,594 --> 00:46:33,671 I like clear, you're not expecting these unspoken things from me, like gratitude that I don't feel. 713 00:46:33,671 --> 00:46:34,951 I'm sorry. 714 00:46:34,951 --> 00:46:37,425 I hate that. 715 00:46:37,425 --> 00:46:39,987 But it's imposed on women all the time. 716 00:46:39,987 --> 00:46:44,631 always saying, I mean, out in the world, I say thank you for things I'm not thankful for. 717 00:46:44,631 --> 00:46:46,933 You're so beautiful, my thank you. 718 00:46:48,335 --> 00:46:49,265 You know? 719 00:46:49,327 --> 00:46:56,535 your hair is just whatever, you know, but inside I just like sharing online anyway that like this is how that makes me feel. 720 00:46:56,535 --> 00:46:59,998 And then for women to come and be like, how dare you feel that way? 721 00:46:59,998 --> 00:47:01,699 I'm always shocked. 722 00:47:01,700 --> 00:47:06,065 And that's why I think I get so mad at white women because I'm just like, what? 723 00:47:06,065 --> 00:47:09,037 You know exactly what I'm talking about. 724 00:47:09,245 --> 00:47:09,625 my God. 725 00:47:09,625 --> 00:47:23,688 So now we're going to get to the Swiftianity of it all because people think like white women think they get to decide whether it's valid for me to have the conversation. 726 00:47:23,688 --> 00:47:24,553 Mm. 727 00:47:24,811 --> 00:47:26,323 I'm like, what? 728 00:47:26,323 --> 00:47:33,466 And they'll usually say in the same phrase where they're telling me to shut up, they'll be like, I was never a blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. 729 00:47:33,466 --> 00:47:35,816 So then this conversation's not for you. 730 00:47:35,816 --> 00:47:37,247 That's it. 731 00:47:37,247 --> 00:47:38,498 Scroll on. 732 00:47:38,498 --> 00:47:49,694 You know, I just, don't, and obviously part of this is cause I just didn't grow up here and get these rules, but I just don't understand why. 733 00:47:49,694 --> 00:47:58,053 you think that you get like a say or to like weigh in on like, cause again, it's the purity. 734 00:47:58,134 --> 00:48:01,696 It's like, you know, it's like, you're just supposed to be over it. 735 00:48:01,696 --> 00:48:05,739 You're just, my God, like how could you still be talking about this? 736 00:48:07,682 --> 00:48:10,696 Sorry, that's the voice my kid does. 737 00:48:10,696 --> 00:48:12,218 That's what it sounds like. 738 00:48:12,218 --> 00:48:14,341 Because you know it don't sound like me. 739 00:48:14,341 --> 00:48:15,720 It sounds a lot like that. 740 00:48:15,720 --> 00:48:22,975 And it's that, it's that good or bad, you know, binary thing, right? 741 00:48:22,975 --> 00:48:28,069 Where it's like, I, I listened to this person's music for 20 years. 742 00:48:28,069 --> 00:48:30,820 I've been on several journeys since then. 743 00:48:30,820 --> 00:48:33,383 There's so much that I need to go through. 744 00:48:33,383 --> 00:48:35,118 Why can't you just get over it already? 745 00:48:35,118 --> 00:48:35,679 Like. 746 00:48:35,679 --> 00:48:39,850 Why do they want you to be like, it's the weird, but that's what I'm saying. 747 00:48:39,850 --> 00:48:42,081 They're like, colonizers. 748 00:48:42,081 --> 00:48:47,703 They just come into and go, you should, who are you talking to? 749 00:48:47,843 --> 00:48:50,914 Cause it can't be, I don't know you internet stranger. 750 00:48:50,914 --> 00:48:53,375 And I used to say that all the time in the comments section. 751 00:48:53,375 --> 00:48:58,446 I would refer to them as internet stranger because I think white women forget that they are. 752 00:48:58,547 --> 00:49:00,087 They really do. 753 00:49:00,291 --> 00:49:04,383 I forgot how much that used to end then rarely, but sometimes they would go, you know what? 754 00:49:04,383 --> 00:49:05,236 Fair enough. 755 00:49:05,236 --> 00:49:05,876 They did. 756 00:49:05,876 --> 00:49:06,487 They forgot. 757 00:49:06,487 --> 00:49:07,617 don't know me. 758 00:49:07,918 --> 00:49:12,626 I said this to somebody, said, okay, you random civilian on the internet. 759 00:49:12,626 --> 00:49:13,557 They forget. 760 00:49:13,557 --> 00:49:15,938 and how could you and that's white. 761 00:49:15,938 --> 00:49:20,340 And that's why I say, like, I've been realizing, like, I do think in black and white. 762 00:49:20,340 --> 00:49:29,163 And that's why I think it's weird that you guys, because I'm thinking in actual black and white because I'm looking because y'all are white and you're real and done clearly black. 763 00:49:29,163 --> 00:49:32,945 And so I'm thinking about those things when you come in with your whiteness. 764 00:49:33,105 --> 00:49:36,977 And and so when everyone's like, don't think so black and white, I just think that's funny. 765 00:49:36,977 --> 00:49:38,958 Like, that's going to be a special or something I'm going to do. 766 00:49:38,958 --> 00:49:39,686 Just. 767 00:49:39,686 --> 00:49:41,381 I'm a black and white thinker. 768 00:49:41,859 --> 00:49:46,463 did it on my live today where they were like, can we just leave the race card behind? 769 00:49:46,463 --> 00:49:50,908 And I was like, so did I stop being white for any part of this conversation? 770 00:49:50,908 --> 00:49:56,005 I don't think I did, which means no, can't leave the race, sorry. 771 00:49:56,005 --> 00:49:58,907 No, I can't, I can't. 772 00:49:58,907 --> 00:50:05,452 And I had to, I, you know, I posted and took it down because like I said, I had to separate myself from the space because even in it, right? 773 00:50:05,452 --> 00:50:15,171 So there's a creator had posted saying, you know, you can't argue with like empirical evidence with your anecdotal evidence to be like, you know, this happens and you go, well, 774 00:50:15,171 --> 00:50:16,402 let's never happen to me. 775 00:50:16,402 --> 00:50:18,524 And now I'm supposed to negate it. 776 00:50:18,524 --> 00:50:18,694 Right. 777 00:50:18,694 --> 00:50:23,048 And I had said, it reminds me of when talking about anything to do with race. 778 00:50:23,048 --> 00:50:27,515 And I realized white people, I'd be like, white people touch my hair a lot, blah, blah, blah. 779 00:50:27,515 --> 00:50:29,375 And this is about race, obviously. 780 00:50:29,375 --> 00:50:33,955 And they'd like, I don't think it's about race because people touch my hair and my hair is curly. 781 00:50:34,195 --> 00:50:36,395 One, white people touch your hair. 782 00:50:36,395 --> 00:50:36,955 And guess what? 783 00:50:36,955 --> 00:50:37,835 It's about their race. 784 00:50:37,835 --> 00:50:39,635 I didn't say this is about black people. 785 00:50:39,635 --> 00:50:41,935 I said, this is about white people, but they don't hear that. 786 00:50:41,935 --> 00:50:42,775 They hear race. 787 00:50:42,775 --> 00:50:44,394 They think black. 788 00:50:44,515 --> 00:50:46,735 And because they're raceless, they're default. 789 00:50:46,735 --> 00:50:48,295 And then race is black. 790 00:50:48,395 --> 00:50:50,855 And I'm saying it's a white people thing. 791 00:50:50,855 --> 00:50:56,537 And they're saying, no, we do it to every, it's like, I, or they do it to. 792 00:50:56,537 --> 00:50:58,708 I don't know who you think I'm talking to. 793 00:50:58,708 --> 00:51:06,894 I'm talking, you know, and so for you to say, well, it's happened to me and I'm white does not change anything that I said, by the way. 794 00:51:07,095 --> 00:51:18,893 But also even if I'm never saying this only happens to black people, that's a weird if it, I mean, only now I'm starting to realize certain things that only black people do, which 795 00:51:18,893 --> 00:51:20,275 is have real conversations. 796 00:51:20,275 --> 00:51:22,389 And, know, that's a start. 797 00:51:22,389 --> 00:51:31,309 They all just like talk at each other and say the things you're supposed to say and birthdays and horoscopes. 798 00:51:31,309 --> 00:51:31,889 don't know. 799 00:51:31,889 --> 00:51:35,489 Like things that are just out here. 800 00:51:35,489 --> 00:51:36,309 Nothing. 801 00:51:36,629 --> 00:51:42,949 I remember asking people like, when's the last time you changed your mind about something and you have a big one? 802 00:51:42,949 --> 00:51:44,129 Taylor Swift. 803 00:51:44,609 --> 00:51:45,889 That's huge. 804 00:51:46,049 --> 00:51:47,489 That's important. 805 00:51:47,649 --> 00:51:49,109 That's an important part of growth. 806 00:51:49,109 --> 00:51:51,632 And I don't think in whiteness ever is that 807 00:51:51,632 --> 00:51:58,823 Something that people talk about when the last time you changed your mind about something and It's like literally the opposite, know the whole debate thing. 808 00:51:58,823 --> 00:52:02,209 It's the same thing where they're just like, all right, stop talking about it now 809 00:52:02,209 --> 00:52:04,535 But did they tell you to stop talking about it when you liked her? 810 00:52:04,535 --> 00:52:05,615 No. 811 00:52:05,615 --> 00:52:06,135 Right. 812 00:52:06,135 --> 00:52:09,475 And there's also this, that's the thing, right? 813 00:52:09,475 --> 00:52:12,755 It's like the purity of it all, or the like, why? 814 00:52:12,755 --> 00:52:14,375 Why do have to do it out loud? 815 00:52:14,375 --> 00:52:23,795 Like, first of all, first of all, I'm doing it out loud, because I'm going to sell 1000 fucking deconstruction workbooks. 816 00:52:23,895 --> 00:52:27,315 That's the main reason I'm doing it out loud. 817 00:52:27,315 --> 00:52:33,255 But also, like, because it's actually much deeper than I thought. 818 00:52:33,655 --> 00:52:37,135 And then I share stuff and then people reflect stuff back to me. 819 00:52:37,135 --> 00:52:42,620 And it's like, actually, I actually built this. 820 00:52:42,620 --> 00:52:43,440 What? 821 00:52:43,780 --> 00:52:45,160 It's the goal. 822 00:52:45,160 --> 00:52:48,280 And people, I think, don't understand that. 823 00:52:48,280 --> 00:52:55,220 It's like, I didn't figure it all out as soon as I said, ew, and walked away. 824 00:52:55,260 --> 00:52:58,100 And that's what people think about cults too, right? 825 00:52:58,100 --> 00:53:00,871 They're like, oh no, I was, but I'm not anymore. 826 00:53:00,871 --> 00:53:11,799 you know, brings us to the conversation, I think about like rehabilitated people going into like black spaces and hurting people when it's like, well, you've left the ideology, 827 00:53:11,799 --> 00:53:13,499 but have you done the work? 828 00:53:13,740 --> 00:53:18,404 And I just don't, I'm embarrassed that it took me so long to get here. 829 00:53:18,404 --> 00:53:21,511 I'm embarrassed that I didn't listen earlier. 830 00:53:21,511 --> 00:53:28,022 You know, there was one, I was like, there was this huge red flag in 2015. 831 00:53:28,022 --> 00:53:37,404 A red flag that I should not have missed, which was her saying, nobody's gonna love you like me, which I already knew was an abusive narcissistic thing to say. 832 00:53:37,404 --> 00:53:41,045 And my husband literally said to me, how are you gonna defend this one now? 833 00:53:41,045 --> 00:53:41,865 Right? 834 00:53:41,865 --> 00:53:49,827 And the only thing I said was, well, I'm not, this one is bad, but everyone gets a bad song, you know? 835 00:53:49,827 --> 00:53:52,048 And I just, because I didn't want to. 836 00:53:52,048 --> 00:53:55,018 Like, I'm embarrassed of a lot of stuff. 837 00:53:55,018 --> 00:53:58,049 I'm not embarrassed that I'm pulling it apart right now. 838 00:53:58,491 --> 00:54:01,945 And it's weird to me that people think that. 839 00:54:02,727 --> 00:54:09,537 it's like, it's this sort of purity that is demanded, you know, like. 840 00:54:09,803 --> 00:54:21,234 Right, and they also, yeah, and like I said, with corporate America for me, was like leaving corporate America wasn't just about I no longer work at this job. 841 00:54:21,234 --> 00:54:34,627 It was leaving the mindset that those are good jobs, that jobs matter a lot to who you are and your success is dependent on these, or that there's a bigger. 842 00:54:34,861 --> 00:54:44,334 whatever, I'm still deconstructing some of that, you know, the capital thing or like what does success mean and getting higher than others and an MBA. 843 00:54:44,334 --> 00:54:45,514 What was that? 844 00:54:45,514 --> 00:54:49,066 You know, it's something I learned stuff. 845 00:54:49,066 --> 00:54:50,927 But why did I do that? 846 00:54:50,927 --> 00:54:52,497 You know, what was I looking for? 847 00:54:52,497 --> 00:54:54,208 And obviously just answers and easy. 848 00:54:54,208 --> 00:54:55,688 I like a rule book too. 849 00:54:55,688 --> 00:55:00,750 I like a guideline, but I also am always okay with changing my mind. 850 00:55:00,750 --> 00:55:02,820 And that doesn't 851 00:55:03,282 --> 00:55:05,422 That's a huge difference in whiteness. 852 00:55:05,422 --> 00:55:08,933 And like, I'm okay with going back and going, you know, I don't know. 853 00:55:08,933 --> 00:55:13,733 I thought this was a good idea based on the information I had at that time. 854 00:55:15,333 --> 00:55:18,833 I wouldn't do it now, but up to now it's not. 855 00:55:19,201 --> 00:55:22,172 there's a reason that a black woman is the one that said that, right? 856 00:55:22,172 --> 00:55:25,726 And Angela Davis say, we know better. 857 00:55:25,746 --> 00:55:28,738 And then once like once we know better, we do better. 858 00:55:28,738 --> 00:55:30,279 You know, we do the best we can. 859 00:55:30,279 --> 00:55:32,561 And then once we know better, we do better. 860 00:55:32,561 --> 00:55:33,365 And it's like, 861 00:55:33,365 --> 00:55:37,134 black women say, you live and you learn and white women say, live, laugh, love. 862 00:55:37,134 --> 00:55:51,207 And also, and also this right, like, if you just walk away from an ideology or from a thing that you used to believe without actually thinking about it, like, you don't 863 00:55:51,207 --> 00:55:54,187 actually walk away from it. 864 00:55:54,187 --> 00:55:58,627 You know, like that doesn't actually start being there. 865 00:55:58,627 --> 00:56:04,127 And it also it occurs to me that like, it is becomes 866 00:56:04,559 --> 00:56:10,724 impossible to look at something as black and white when you start digging into it. 867 00:56:10,805 --> 00:56:14,419 You know, like, because that's even it. 868 00:56:14,419 --> 00:56:16,159 I didn't know how to explain it before. 869 00:56:16,159 --> 00:56:20,454 But when the white women that do comment and they're like, I was never into her. 870 00:56:20,454 --> 00:56:23,576 It has a very like, oh, you know, I was right. 871 00:56:23,576 --> 00:56:24,037 Right? 872 00:56:24,037 --> 00:56:25,538 Like I was right. 873 00:56:25,538 --> 00:56:27,530 She was a bad she was bad guy. 874 00:56:27,530 --> 00:56:29,681 And now her colors are coming out. 875 00:56:30,062 --> 00:56:31,494 And that's true. 876 00:56:31,494 --> 00:56:33,795 all those things were true. 877 00:56:33,815 --> 00:56:38,166 But what is the reason that I was into her, right? 878 00:56:38,166 --> 00:56:41,957 Or even when people are like, yeah, she just appeals to white mediocrity. 879 00:56:42,017 --> 00:56:43,078 Okay. 880 00:56:43,078 --> 00:56:45,818 But why was I chasing that so hard? 881 00:56:45,818 --> 00:56:51,460 You know, like, there, to me, it gets, it got super, super deep. 882 00:56:51,600 --> 00:56:56,161 The first time it was like, why did you idealize this person? 883 00:56:56,282 --> 00:56:58,342 And it immediately was like, 884 00:56:58,534 --> 00:57:03,380 I think I thought this was an alternate version of me, like a me that I could have been without the trauma. 885 00:57:03,380 --> 00:57:09,977 And the more I find out about her real background, the more I, you know, like it makes sense to me. 886 00:57:09,977 --> 00:57:17,193 But it's like another person wasn't gonna have that situation because they didn't come from the same thing, you know? 887 00:57:18,175 --> 00:57:18,734 And it... 888 00:57:18,734 --> 00:57:20,977 And even that situation's made up. 889 00:57:20,977 --> 00:57:22,199 Like, it's not real. 890 00:57:22,199 --> 00:57:24,281 You know, it's not real. 891 00:57:24,422 --> 00:57:27,907 It was designed to make you feel the way you felt. 892 00:57:27,907 --> 00:57:29,668 That's why it... 893 00:57:30,289 --> 00:57:34,993 And it even goes further into this like, oh, so you're a racist. 894 00:57:34,993 --> 00:57:40,182 And it's like, well, I mean, I supported this for 20 years. 895 00:57:40,182 --> 00:57:41,108 I didn't listen. 896 00:57:41,108 --> 00:57:42,759 I looked past a lot of red flags. 897 00:57:42,759 --> 00:57:46,513 Like, yeah, I probably did a bunch of things that were racist. 898 00:57:46,513 --> 00:57:53,297 While at the same time, I've been trying to have this other, like it's not a yes or no question. 899 00:57:53,353 --> 00:57:55,653 black people don't go around asking that. 900 00:57:55,933 --> 00:57:57,004 So we are racist? 901 00:57:57,004 --> 00:58:00,144 Why we're not waiting for you to tell us one, you know? 902 00:58:00,144 --> 00:58:03,064 And like, it's not a gotcha. 903 00:58:03,064 --> 00:58:12,861 We don't want you to continue being, if you are, our goal isn't that you announce, what in the, like white people, stop, you know? 904 00:58:12,861 --> 00:58:20,947 And that's why I really think, I don't know what I want to do with it, but I have a do's and don'ts, and I was like of the waiting room for white people before you enter these 905 00:58:20,947 --> 00:58:21,298 spaces. 906 00:58:21,298 --> 00:58:32,898 Between leaving your cult experience and joining a community, you need to sit in the waiting room, the why am I talking room, because you need to know you're white. 907 00:58:32,918 --> 00:58:34,770 It will happen to deal with whiteness in there. 908 00:58:34,770 --> 00:58:40,092 There will be mostly white women in there who have sat there before and are on their way out, but you know, have 909 00:58:40,092 --> 00:58:49,752 I remember I used to use this analogy of like, it's got glass walls and you can kind of see through and hear the black people laughing and stuff and you run and you're like, I 910 00:58:49,752 --> 00:58:51,212 wanna go where the fun is. 911 00:58:51,212 --> 00:58:53,272 But you run right into the glass wall. 912 00:58:53,272 --> 00:58:56,811 Now it's up to the other people in the waiting room to stop you. 913 00:58:56,892 --> 00:58:57,952 To what are you gonna do? 914 00:58:57,952 --> 00:58:59,712 Just let people keep running into that wall? 915 00:58:59,712 --> 00:59:01,732 Cause they're gonna keep doing it. 916 00:59:01,912 --> 00:59:03,952 I'm telling you. 917 00:59:04,432 --> 00:59:06,812 So wait, you sit with your pamphlets. 918 00:59:07,409 --> 00:59:08,615 yeah. 919 00:59:08,615 --> 00:59:16,129 And so this brings me to the MAGA of it all and to like, what do we do with the ex MAGA's? 920 00:59:16,129 --> 00:59:27,852 So there, there's been this conversation that I kind of have been drug into, which is, you know, liberal white women are harming people. 921 00:59:28,394 --> 00:59:31,965 harming the black community by saying, like, let's forgive and forget. 922 00:59:31,965 --> 00:59:37,808 um And I think I have not been doing that at all. 923 00:59:37,808 --> 00:59:41,450 But I, you know, there's a couple of things here. 924 00:59:41,450 --> 00:59:46,151 It's like, first of all, I'm very consciously not trying to set myself up as a leader. 925 00:59:46,151 --> 00:59:49,912 And I don't think I'm the one to be leading right now, right? 926 00:59:49,912 --> 00:59:52,913 I just kind of wanted to be a popular academic. 927 00:59:53,153 --> 00:59:56,174 And I'm trying to figure out now the response. 928 00:59:56,174 --> 00:59:59,170 the responsibilities of having a big platform. 929 00:59:59,376 --> 00:59:59,828 Sorry. 930 00:59:59,828 --> 01:00:06,852 leaders, leaders, what a leader really is and what a white leader is, you know, leaders are circumstantial. 931 01:00:06,852 --> 01:00:12,086 You lead by example, all the time, you know, it's not leading. 932 01:00:12,086 --> 01:00:18,709 I understand what you're saying in terms of like leading a movement, being the face of a revolution. 933 01:00:18,709 --> 01:00:25,342 We don't, you know, I don't think you should be speaking for all anything, but you can speak for angry white women. 934 01:00:25,684 --> 01:00:31,821 I think we would love to hear a specific conversation about white women getting us here. 935 01:00:31,821 --> 01:00:36,806 Because unless you address it, it's not going to change. 936 01:00:36,806 --> 01:00:40,801 I, look what happens when a black woman dies. 937 01:00:40,801 --> 01:00:43,133 I've been talking with us about the gun situation. 938 01:00:43,133 --> 01:00:48,398 Like, I want us to get very, very clear on the fact that we're never getting all the guns out of America. 939 01:00:48,398 --> 01:00:50,400 Like that is physically impossible. 940 01:00:50,400 --> 01:00:51,711 It's not going to happen. 941 01:00:51,711 --> 01:00:56,915 So can we please have the conversation about why white men and white women keep raising school shooters? 942 01:00:56,996 --> 01:00:59,949 Like that, that's the conversation we need to have. 943 01:00:59,949 --> 01:01:01,635 Like that's the culture. 944 01:01:01,635 --> 01:01:03,266 we need to change, right? 945 01:01:03,266 --> 01:01:12,955 Because it's a, it is one demographic of America, young white men, that when bad stuff happens to them, takes guns and shoots up schools, right? 946 01:01:12,955 --> 01:01:17,498 Like we need to get like super micro on this conversation. 947 01:01:17,498 --> 01:01:19,491 But with MAGA, okay? 948 01:01:19,491 --> 01:01:27,791 So with like, because some people even say like, I am making it less serious by calling it a cult or by somehow implying, 949 01:01:27,791 --> 01:01:37,938 that because this is a cult, means we don't hold people accountable for believing truly harmful things and like letting the fascists come to power. 950 01:01:38,078 --> 01:01:42,173 But my question is like, what's the process? 951 01:01:42,173 --> 01:01:48,317 And I think this waiting room thing that you're talking like, these are the conversations that we need to have. 952 01:01:48,317 --> 01:01:50,914 Like, what are we gonna do? 953 01:01:50,914 --> 01:01:53,836 Are we gonna execute 77 million people? 954 01:01:53,836 --> 01:01:55,521 No, right? 955 01:01:55,521 --> 01:01:59,242 Are we gonna be able to kick them out or separate them out anyway? 956 01:01:59,242 --> 01:02:00,102 No. 957 01:02:00,102 --> 01:02:03,323 So like, what are we going to do? 958 01:02:03,323 --> 01:02:19,734 Like, how do we, and I think it's like, how do we, the non-MAGO white people, like hang out in the waiting room and debrief all those people and make sure they're ready? 959 01:02:19,734 --> 01:02:23,796 to go into the next one without hurting people. 960 01:02:24,280 --> 01:02:24,890 Right. 961 01:02:24,890 --> 01:02:27,472 And I think it's by seeing them as people. 962 01:02:27,472 --> 01:02:30,253 And I don't think white people are doing that. 963 01:02:30,253 --> 01:02:32,556 I think they like having a bad guy. 964 01:02:32,556 --> 01:02:38,860 And a lot of them, not everybody, because you are seeing them as humans and they like not seeing them as humans. 965 01:02:38,860 --> 01:02:44,323 And that's similar to if someone comes in, a black woman comes in and goes, all right, I can try to get this together. 966 01:02:44,323 --> 01:02:49,867 You go, yeah, well, she's not, you know, this desire to hold on to things the way they are. 967 01:02:49,867 --> 01:02:50,848 And, 968 01:02:51,266 --> 01:02:57,629 But if people are serious and I think there's a difference between referring to MAGA, right? 969 01:02:57,629 --> 01:03:00,470 Cause even when people say MAGA, it's like, what are you even saying? 970 01:03:00,470 --> 01:03:10,392 I think people need to be more specific, but there's this tendency to refer to people as concepts, not cousins, just like with black people, they would do, I like black people in 971 01:03:10,392 --> 01:03:11,052 general. 972 01:03:11,052 --> 01:03:15,153 I treat black, the way people talk about people's concepts is so white, right? 973 01:03:15,153 --> 01:03:17,425 Not like when they say we and they, 974 01:03:17,425 --> 01:03:20,638 They don't really mean the same we and they that I've referred to with black people. 975 01:03:20,638 --> 01:03:23,140 We're talking about black people and white people. 976 01:03:23,140 --> 01:03:26,962 When white people talk about we and they, they're saying good people and bad people. 977 01:03:27,163 --> 01:03:30,326 Now that may mean black and white sometimes. 978 01:03:30,326 --> 01:03:33,768 And that's what people have to understand is that you're not being specific. 979 01:03:33,768 --> 01:03:39,133 When you say MAGA, you're saying people who you're saying make America great again, people. 980 01:03:39,133 --> 01:03:40,754 What does that mean? 981 01:03:40,754 --> 01:03:41,535 Are they in the cult? 982 01:03:41,535 --> 01:03:42,336 Are they not in cult? 983 01:03:42,336 --> 01:03:45,038 Is it your uncle that you love and still care about? 984 01:03:45,038 --> 01:03:46,489 Then you have the 985 01:03:46,489 --> 01:03:49,581 invested reason to care enough to talk to him. 986 01:03:49,581 --> 01:03:53,633 Maybe bring, show him a video you like and see him as a person. 987 01:03:53,633 --> 01:04:04,849 But as long as we're talking hypothetical harm and these hypothetical harmful people that we need to punish because they're bad. 988 01:04:04,849 --> 01:04:05,810 What did they do? 989 01:04:05,810 --> 01:04:15,715 Who was harmed and how is it a person, you know, who did a bad thing that we need to acknowledge or is it just this idea of a millions of people? 990 01:04:16,633 --> 01:04:19,615 that's why I can't give a satisfactory answer to them. 991 01:04:19,615 --> 01:04:23,818 And that's why yours and my idea of how to break brainwashing is different. 992 01:04:24,119 --> 01:04:28,802 Because when people are like, they're like, OK, so how do we get people out of cults? 993 01:04:29,303 --> 01:04:33,467 It's like, there are people who are concepts, right? 994 01:04:33,467 --> 01:04:34,898 You can't kill a concept. 995 01:04:34,898 --> 01:04:41,172 You can't get someone to stop believing in something until they want to. 996 01:04:41,733 --> 01:04:43,605 And the answer. 997 01:04:43,605 --> 01:04:45,086 work for all people. 998 01:04:45,086 --> 01:04:45,798 exactly. 999 01:04:45,798 --> 01:04:49,017 And like the answer is you have to know them as a person. 1000 01:04:49,241 --> 01:04:49,754 Yep. 1001 01:04:49,754 --> 01:04:52,124 and it's going to be different for every person. 1002 01:04:52,124 --> 01:04:52,925 That's exactly. 1003 01:04:52,925 --> 01:05:02,453 And that's why when people ask me general questions about like what shit, it's like, I don't know you and what your traumeliges are for how you can help us. 1004 01:05:02,453 --> 01:05:03,874 That's literally the point. 1005 01:05:03,874 --> 01:05:06,116 No one could have told me that I could do this work. 1006 01:05:06,116 --> 01:05:18,666 Only I knew I could do it because of my experiences, but my traumeliges, my traumas, my privileges, my unique set of skills, not special, unique set, but none of my individual 1007 01:05:18,666 --> 01:05:20,317 experiences are. 1008 01:05:20,473 --> 01:05:27,786 unique and on their own, you know, but it's seeing humans and seeing each person as a person. 1009 01:05:27,786 --> 01:05:31,167 And you're not just dealing with y'all aren't even talking to these people. 1010 01:05:31,167 --> 01:05:36,450 And I think, like I said, people seek solutions instead of accept answers. 1011 01:05:36,450 --> 01:05:39,881 And why that's kind of why it's been hard for me to figure out like, am I doing? 1012 01:05:39,881 --> 01:05:44,993 But I do think the dos and don'ts will be good because it's like, got some of that stuff, like accept the answers. 1013 01:05:44,993 --> 01:05:49,195 Don't seek solutions because we're not problems to solve. 1014 01:05:49,195 --> 01:05:50,215 not math. 1015 01:05:51,045 --> 01:05:54,360 And I think the appearance control comes into this so heavy. 1016 01:05:54,360 --> 01:05:58,121 Because if you think about, right, if I think about white women, it's just. 1017 01:05:58,121 --> 01:06:00,042 uh a blur of people. 1018 01:06:00,042 --> 01:06:06,326 If I think about like, abstract white women that I don't know, it's just everyone looks the same. 1019 01:06:07,448 --> 01:06:12,651 If I think about a group of black women that I don't know, I don't feel like everybody looks the same. 1020 01:06:13,492 --> 01:06:16,674 Like everybody looks very, very different. 1021 01:06:16,674 --> 01:06:19,196 And that's like, part of it. 1022 01:06:19,196 --> 01:06:21,737 That's like the fear of standing out. 1023 01:06:21,737 --> 01:06:26,942 And it just always comes back to like, the fear of being an individual. 1024 01:06:26,942 --> 01:06:34,857 being individual, the fear of having even, you know, this Jasmine Crockett thing. 1025 01:06:34,857 --> 01:06:37,400 I'm like, I was like, okay. 1026 01:06:37,400 --> 01:06:43,345 Now I have to have these real conversations with people about like, what are we really doing? 1027 01:06:43,345 --> 01:06:45,206 Who are we really voting for? 1028 01:06:45,206 --> 01:06:48,439 Like, people don't want to have real conversations. 1029 01:06:48,439 --> 01:06:50,781 They want to not stand out. 1030 01:06:50,781 --> 01:06:52,533 They want to not have a hot take. 1031 01:06:52,533 --> 01:06:53,033 Right? 1032 01:06:53,033 --> 01:06:54,994 Well, they also think they're going to be the only one. 1033 01:06:54,994 --> 01:06:58,927 So that's what's interesting is because like, I would, so like I'm colorful right now. 1034 01:06:58,927 --> 01:07:01,458 I would stand out, but like, I'm not alone. 1035 01:07:01,458 --> 01:07:03,439 You forget other people exist too. 1036 01:07:03,439 --> 01:07:11,092 So Christina and I don't look similarly at all, but she would stand out on her and I would stand out on my own, but together, maybe we both stand out together. 1037 01:07:11,092 --> 01:07:11,922 That's not really the point. 1038 01:07:11,922 --> 01:07:14,243 I don't, it's not a center of attention. 1039 01:07:14,243 --> 01:07:19,805 That's not a thing that exists, but I think in whiteness, there is a center of attention because it's like you're. 1040 01:07:19,969 --> 01:07:21,911 You're like, who can be the shiniest ball? 1041 01:07:21,911 --> 01:07:24,852 And we're over here like being a tree, you know? 1042 01:07:24,852 --> 01:07:26,903 that's we're very, we're doing different stuff. 1043 01:07:26,903 --> 01:07:29,195 And you guys are all like, but who's the shiniest? 1044 01:07:29,195 --> 01:07:33,698 Who gets chosen as the, you know, the most round, spherical, I don't know. 1045 01:07:33,698 --> 01:07:40,303 My analogies are all over this today, but that's, it's being also aware that other people exist. 1046 01:07:40,303 --> 01:07:46,898 One of my mutuals, white women who's like been following me a long time, Mel Hamlet, who I love, made posts about, you know, 1047 01:07:46,898 --> 01:07:56,512 women in Hollywood and men and you sometimes these men really hate these women and they display it in these weird ways and she critiques it and a big Disney princess type white 1048 01:07:56,512 --> 01:08:06,396 woman came for her and in her comments going back at her celebrity like big you know celebrity and she had messaged me saying like how proud she was that she didn't defend 1049 01:08:06,396 --> 01:08:15,858 herself or whatever and really the community understood her point and you know the way you expect people to react is not the way they always react. 1050 01:08:15,858 --> 01:08:17,689 especially if you have community. 1051 01:08:17,689 --> 01:08:23,912 And so, she got a little nervous, but she just kind of stuck, I don't like the phrase stuck to your guns, but that's like all I can think. 1052 01:08:23,912 --> 01:08:30,024 But it's like the only one that really, Her principles, yeah, but it's like forming them. 1053 01:08:30,024 --> 01:08:33,377 You don't know your principles until you have to stick to them. 1054 01:08:33,377 --> 01:08:43,551 And yeah, it was nice that, know, she mentioned like, I was so proud of myself, but people do come in and know, especially when black women can say their stuff, you'll be fine. 1055 01:08:43,948 --> 01:08:48,020 you know, but it is unfortunate how 1056 01:08:48,170 --> 01:08:52,183 Well, I mean, that's what I'm having in the conversation right now. 1057 01:08:52,183 --> 01:09:05,812 Like I did not know that Jasmine Crockett voted on this Israel thing, but I do know that I think I share her values and I think I want her to be a leader in my country because she's 1058 01:09:05,812 --> 01:09:07,843 one of the ones that I've seen. 1059 01:09:07,843 --> 01:09:16,400 And then in just a little bit of feedback, it was white women saying, oh, she voted for Israel and black women saying thank you for. 1060 01:09:16,400 --> 01:09:17,206 for standing up 1061 01:09:17,206 --> 01:09:20,038 Like that, that's a lot. 1062 01:09:20,479 --> 01:09:21,680 Those are different things. 1063 01:09:21,680 --> 01:09:24,681 like, that's what people choose to say. 1064 01:09:24,681 --> 01:09:27,463 So it's not just that this is sentiments, right? 1065 01:09:27,463 --> 01:09:34,657 Black women are actively commenting and that's such a, we don't just talk for no reason to say, thank you for saying something. 1066 01:09:34,657 --> 01:09:37,029 What I'm saying is white women's voice, it matters. 1067 01:09:37,029 --> 01:09:41,904 And when you use it matters and look at how they're using it in your, you know. 1068 01:09:41,904 --> 01:09:48,822 you, when you say something and black women are supportive, here they come going, the nerve of these men of women. 1069 01:09:48,822 --> 01:09:51,254 And that's why it goes that way. 1070 01:09:51,254 --> 01:09:52,225 And it's frustrating. 1071 01:09:52,225 --> 01:09:58,370 And, know, obviously not all, whatever, but only white women. 1072 01:09:58,370 --> 01:10:02,744 So while it's not all, it's only, so who's going to do something about it? 1073 01:10:02,744 --> 01:10:04,697 Cause clearly look what happens when we try. 1074 01:10:04,697 --> 01:10:12,342 And I think that's what's so disheartening for me is cause I'm just like, Ooh, I hate the walls that makes you build up before you just say anything. 1075 01:10:12,427 --> 01:10:22,625 And, and, and, you know, not for nothing, like I had a conversation with a black woman veteran, and who's higher ranking than me. 1076 01:10:22,625 --> 01:10:26,827 And I said, you know, my gosh, you should write the book, I would help you. 1077 01:10:26,988 --> 01:10:34,095 And, you know, she's, she's not interested because being that public face. 1078 01:10:34,095 --> 01:10:34,655 Yeah. 1079 01:10:34,655 --> 01:10:36,486 know, we see what they do to you. 1080 01:10:36,486 --> 01:10:39,567 Imagine what they would do to... 1081 01:10:39,567 --> 01:10:40,531 By you, I meant me. 1082 01:10:40,531 --> 01:10:43,003 know, imagine what they would do to her. 1083 01:10:43,063 --> 01:10:45,464 Yeah, I get it completely. 1084 01:10:45,464 --> 01:10:56,253 And a lot of that was my tromelages and my privileges of not interacting with this type of patriarchal feminism, which I found I liked that phrase I read in all about love for my 1085 01:10:56,253 --> 01:10:58,585 book club this last month. 1086 01:10:58,585 --> 01:11:04,481 Patriarchal feminism, where, you know, like, for the good. 1087 01:11:04,481 --> 01:11:12,967 right, for the good of, be more like men is respectability politics for women, you know, it's all that where I'm not used to that. 1088 01:11:13,328 --> 01:11:20,995 And so now I want to tell white women about it, but it's like, then you argue with me and go, well, so I had posted saying, you know, white women do this. 1089 01:11:20,995 --> 01:11:29,803 they said, someone commented white women correct other white women too, you know, cause I was like, all you guys do is correct black women or commiserate with white women, blah, 1090 01:11:29,803 --> 01:11:30,353 blah, blah, blah. 1091 01:11:30,353 --> 01:11:32,825 And I'm like, and they're like, well, they also correct. 1092 01:11:33,277 --> 01:11:34,348 White women. 1093 01:11:34,490 --> 01:11:38,036 So you're correcting me about... 1094 01:11:39,480 --> 01:11:41,010 Why are you talking? 1095 01:11:41,010 --> 01:11:43,767 I call this mansplaining the mansplaining. 1096 01:11:44,103 --> 01:11:44,618 Right. 1097 01:11:44,618 --> 01:11:45,118 Right. 1098 01:11:45,118 --> 01:11:47,931 But then they, they were following me and they were like on my side. 1099 01:11:47,931 --> 01:11:48,872 Right. 1100 01:11:48,872 --> 01:12:00,571 And I'm just like, I don't, I'm, I've got to do, so I feel like I, if I, I'll feel more sane if I do the waiting room dos and don'ts and it's like a little pamphlet. 1101 01:12:00,571 --> 01:12:11,337 This is what we are going to do if we're not to before you're allowed to come into the next phase and into the room because you can't come in thinking you, or even that you're 1102 01:12:11,337 --> 01:12:12,454 going to learn about. 1103 01:12:12,454 --> 01:12:14,616 blackness or about black women. 1104 01:12:14,616 --> 01:12:19,308 No, you're going to learn from black women, but they're not in that place. 1105 01:12:19,308 --> 01:12:24,103 They're like, we're going to decide about, yeah. 1106 01:12:24,103 --> 01:12:29,897 And like talk about whiteness, talk about your race, talk about how in your comments, this is what right? 1107 01:12:29,897 --> 01:12:31,448 Only white women do this. 1108 01:12:31,448 --> 01:12:32,419 I didn't know. 1109 01:12:32,419 --> 01:12:33,459 You know? 1110 01:12:33,600 --> 01:12:37,322 And then I tell them about it they're like, well, we do this to each other too. 1111 01:12:37,322 --> 01:12:38,183 Great. 1112 01:12:38,183 --> 01:12:39,663 So stop. 1113 01:12:40,436 --> 01:12:41,437 Stop it! 1114 01:12:41,437 --> 01:12:42,738 Stop! 1115 01:12:42,738 --> 01:12:45,000 Why are you arguing with me about this? 1116 01:12:45,000 --> 01:12:50,104 You it's like... 1117 01:12:50,104 --> 01:12:51,145 You have so much energy. 1118 01:12:51,145 --> 01:13:02,595 And so when I talk about the Angel Tree thing, it's like all this morality and energy into gifting and performing goodness around this time of year and giving the way you're giving 1119 01:13:02,595 --> 01:13:02,756 it. 1120 01:13:02,756 --> 01:13:03,657 What? 1121 01:13:03,657 --> 01:13:04,798 What if you didn't? 1122 01:13:04,798 --> 01:13:07,236 What if this all made no sense? 1123 01:13:07,236 --> 01:13:10,136 and you didn't have to and the kids are actually fine. 1124 01:13:10,136 --> 01:13:11,416 It's like speaking for the kids. 1125 01:13:11,416 --> 01:13:15,267 Another thing is like the thing I was saying about Angel Chase is like you're speaking for these children. 1126 01:13:15,267 --> 01:13:15,927 They didn't. 1127 01:13:15,927 --> 01:13:18,847 How did they decide on this list of things that their parents are the list? 1128 01:13:18,847 --> 01:13:20,887 The parent has to fill out the form. 1129 01:13:21,127 --> 01:13:24,287 Are they going to now guilt this kid because they went to Angel? 1130 01:13:24,287 --> 01:13:26,527 Like I'm thinking about the children. 1131 01:13:26,627 --> 01:13:27,867 Y'all are performing. 1132 01:13:27,867 --> 01:13:29,827 I don't know what this is. 1133 01:13:30,007 --> 01:13:32,878 I think Christmas might be bad for you guys. 1134 01:13:32,878 --> 01:13:36,713 but it feels like this is the good time of year and this is when we're all really nice to each other. 1135 01:13:36,713 --> 01:13:39,626 Geez, this is it? 1136 01:13:39,626 --> 01:13:45,158 But no, gifts don't have to be this way and I've understood gifts differently, like, I don't know. 1137 01:13:45,158 --> 01:13:45,614 Sorry. 1138 01:13:45,614 --> 01:13:55,133 But the when and who and this attitude control, I feel like it goes down to that stuff, you know, like who you're speaking for. 1139 01:13:55,133 --> 01:13:56,235 It's the... 1140 01:13:56,289 --> 01:14:00,644 You know, there's even drama about whether you say Merry Christmas or Happy Holidays. 1141 01:14:00,644 --> 01:14:02,545 Like, it's just... 1142 01:14:02,726 --> 01:14:05,108 And like, you know, it's... 1143 01:14:05,191 --> 01:14:06,972 The oppression! 1144 01:14:07,393 --> 01:14:09,875 People wanna say something else? 1145 01:14:09,930 --> 01:14:11,471 It's like, and look, I get it. 1146 01:14:11,471 --> 01:14:20,707 There are white people that refuse to say happy holidays and will only say Merry Christmas because they're Christian nationalist racists, right? 1147 01:14:20,707 --> 01:14:22,208 Like, yes. 1148 01:14:22,269 --> 01:14:31,576 But then we get, like in my family, are atheist liberals and we say Merry Christmas because we are cultural Christians. 1149 01:14:31,576 --> 01:14:33,157 That's just where we come from. 1150 01:14:33,157 --> 01:14:34,728 That's what we do. 1151 01:14:34,728 --> 01:14:38,186 We both try to say happy holidays more and more, but it's like, 1152 01:14:38,186 --> 01:14:47,206 there's a policing of what another person is saying that is just very interesting to observe at this time. 1153 01:14:47,206 --> 01:14:54,386 that's all white coat like that's only why people have the time and energy to care about what other people say. 1154 01:14:54,386 --> 01:14:56,206 I say nothing. 1155 01:14:56,226 --> 01:15:01,146 No part of me has ever been like because I don't associate times of year with things. 1156 01:15:01,146 --> 01:15:05,826 I still don't understand that if you like pumpkin spice you can only have it certain times a year. 1157 01:15:05,826 --> 01:15:06,866 It doesn't even make any sense. 1158 01:15:06,866 --> 01:15:08,306 White people what is wrong? 1159 01:15:08,306 --> 01:15:10,626 Sorry I'm not whispering. 1160 01:15:11,086 --> 01:15:13,746 I was just like but I get so it's like 1161 01:15:13,792 --> 01:15:16,623 Because it's not like it only exists during that time of year. 1162 01:15:16,623 --> 01:15:18,090 If you like it, you like it. 1163 01:15:18,090 --> 01:15:20,352 What is with the scheduling of fun? 1164 01:15:20,352 --> 01:15:22,214 Access at Starbucks. 1165 01:15:22,682 --> 01:15:26,362 It was the red cups and the cups and the happy holiday. 1166 01:15:26,362 --> 01:15:27,802 I literally don't care. 1167 01:15:27,802 --> 01:15:31,882 People say Merry Christmas and I go, oh, I don't know. 1168 01:15:31,882 --> 01:15:33,962 I don't think about it for more than a second. 1169 01:15:33,962 --> 01:15:34,862 I'm like, oh, that's weird. 1170 01:15:34,862 --> 01:15:35,922 It's cultural coercion. 1171 01:15:35,922 --> 01:15:37,742 I've lived here my whole life. 1172 01:15:37,742 --> 01:15:39,042 It's fine. 1173 01:15:39,362 --> 01:15:42,854 There's other things I'm more concerned about, to be honest, like police brutality. 1174 01:15:42,854 --> 01:15:44,475 it goes much deeper than that. 1175 01:15:44,475 --> 01:15:58,332 Like, I'm sure you would like the anti-Semitism in the United States to be removed, not just for people to say, happy Hanukkah, you know, like it is, it is by doing that tiniest 1176 01:15:58,332 --> 01:16:01,802 little bit, put a bandaid on it instead of like, 1177 01:16:01,802 --> 01:16:06,204 I would rather people also just keep your honestly, they could just keep their stuff to themselves. 1178 01:16:06,204 --> 01:16:07,104 We don't care. 1179 01:16:07,104 --> 01:16:09,686 Like Jewish people keep our stuff to ourselves. 1180 01:16:09,686 --> 01:16:11,217 We do with our things on our time. 1181 01:16:11,217 --> 01:16:19,861 Like it's the that's why Christianity is like has to be discussed itself because nobody rebrands from doing bad stuff and becomes Jewish. 1182 01:16:19,861 --> 01:16:26,293 You know, like we said, like they usually rebrand and become Christian because one is easy in, you know, and they just 1183 01:16:26,295 --> 01:16:26,915 I'm it now. 1184 01:16:26,915 --> 01:16:28,086 I'm reading the Bible. 1185 01:16:28,086 --> 01:16:31,347 They don't even have to, because now people are like, they might be good. 1186 01:16:32,328 --> 01:16:32,849 Right. 1187 01:16:32,849 --> 01:16:38,682 So that whole, the whole Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays thing, that's very culty. 1188 01:16:38,682 --> 01:16:43,466 It's very colonizing because just talk like a normal person. 1189 01:16:43,466 --> 01:16:43,926 Hello. 1190 01:16:43,926 --> 01:16:44,488 Goodbye. 1191 01:16:44,488 --> 01:16:49,551 Why do we have to be like, happy this day, happy Mother's Day, happy Father's Day. 1192 01:16:49,551 --> 01:16:51,092 Why don't we just shut up? 1193 01:16:51,092 --> 01:16:53,653 Just live your own day. 1194 01:16:54,099 --> 01:16:57,117 Sorry, but that's what I've got. 1195 01:16:57,117 --> 01:17:02,360 You bring up so many things that I've never thought about, which is, of course, why we do this. 1196 01:17:02,360 --> 01:17:07,396 um Super, super interesting. 1197 01:17:07,396 --> 01:17:08,777 Thanks for... 1198 01:17:09,050 --> 01:17:18,063 I need the waiting room list of do's and don'ts because I think it's going to be super important as we go forward from here. 1199 01:17:18,063 --> 01:17:19,193 Yeah, I think you're right. 1200 01:17:19,193 --> 01:17:21,034 I've been sitting, I've been working on it. 1201 01:17:21,034 --> 01:17:24,935 So that'll be also coming up between the book club and the do's and don'ts. 1202 01:17:24,935 --> 01:17:28,266 was like, we're going to work on some slowing down things. 1203 01:17:28,266 --> 01:17:30,497 So I'm like, okay, we need it. 1204 01:17:30,497 --> 01:17:39,489 But that was, you brought up really good points too, especially with the like the mag of it all and the white people and like, yeah, we've to be specific. 1205 01:17:39,489 --> 01:17:40,951 Make it about your race. 1206 01:17:40,951 --> 01:17:44,050 When I say make it about race, they think it's like make it about black trauma. 1207 01:17:44,050 --> 01:17:46,544 No, no, you've got your own. 1208 01:17:46,665 --> 01:17:48,449 Like this is the time to make it about you. 1209 01:17:48,449 --> 01:17:49,139 to talk about. 1210 01:17:49,139 --> 01:17:51,660 Yeah, I'm learning how to do it all the time. 1211 01:17:51,660 --> 01:17:53,952 So I appreciate your help. 1212 01:17:53,952 --> 01:17:56,213 Thank you all so much for listening. 1213 01:17:56,213 --> 01:18:05,959 Please follow Rebecca on her Patreon and you can gift a subscription to a friend that you would like to have real conversations with about whiteness and all of this. 1214 01:18:06,219 --> 01:18:07,471 Thanks so much.