So how do narcissists feel when you finally call it quits?

I know y'all see the hair.

I know y'all see the hair.

New hair, new me.

Seriously, how do they feel inside?

What happens to a narcissist when you finally decide that you're done for good?

There's no going back into the toxicity.

You are not you.

You went no contact.

You disappeared.

You ghosted them.

How do they feel inside?

That's what we're talking about today, y'all.

Of course you're new here.

I'm Lee Hammock.

I'm a diagnosed narcissist myself.

And welcome to another episode of The Narcissist Code.

We're getting closer to that release of the mental illness podcast, y'all.

We are absolutely getting closer to the first drop and then it'll keep dropping and dropping and dropping and dropping.

But yes, make sure you subscribe, like, comment, turn on, turn on your notifications so you do not miss an episode of the the new podcast that's launching my interview series.

But yeah, yeah, let's hop right into it.

Narcissistic people, toxic people hate it.

When you are done for good, let's keep you up.

I'm keeping it hot.

I'm keeping it ready like a Little Caesar's pizza.

Y'all know that's what I do, Yeah.

Little Caesars need to go ahead and send me a sponsorship too.

I'll talk about Little Caesars.

It's way too much for them to just.

I'm just all saying something else.

Domino's keep hydrated like a Domino's beast.

No, but seriously, how do they feel inside when you, your empathetic self, your healing self, are done for good?

First off, a lot of narces don't ever think you'll be done.

Let's get let's, let's go ahead and get this first tidbit out the way.

There are a ton of narcissists and toxic people out there who do not think that you would ever be done with them.

They don't think you can.

They think that they are the best thing that has ever happened to you, even if they've done you horribly, even if they treated you terribly, even if they've done so much, so much wrong to you, even if they've hurt you, harm you, put their hands on you, just treated you like the scum of the damn earth.

They don't think you'll ever be done with them.

But why Lee?

Why Lee?

Why in the hell wouldn't they think that I will be done after they've done so much?

Because maybe you've taken them back before, after they've done something similar, you know, again, this is not victim blaming.

This is just me letting you know how a narcissist or highly toxic person thinks in these situations.

They could absolutely think that you that you'll just come back again.

Hey, I know I beat their ass before black their eye, blooded their nose, broken their bones, whatever.

I've done some horrible ass stuff to them and they still came back.

They called me, they reached out to me, they dropped the charges, they made sure I didn't go to jail.

They gave me money, they kept me out of jail, so I don't think that they're ever be done with me.

I plus also plus I convinced them that we were twin flames or that we were kindred spirits or whatever other stuff like whatever that type of shit is like twin, twin flames, kindred spirits.

I convinced them that we had a soul tie.

We had a very special soul tie.

I soul tie was like a like a like a shoe Strat like a tie shoe.

It wasn't just a normal tie like this.

It was like a like you tie shoot.

It had two bows and everything.

We had a special soul tie.

That's what they saying right now.

This is got the type of stuff that they say to you right now with it.

What goes on in their minds.

They think that they've convinced you if they've done enough work to keep you right where you are mentally, emotionally, physically, all of the above.

They really do believe that y'all, I know y'all are just thinking like, what the hell?

Why Lee?

Why the hell would they believe something so stupid?

Because, and I'm not calling you stupid, please don't take it that way because some of them do think that you're dumb.

You know, I don't know how to keep it straightforward on this channel.

I don't, I try not to try to just just move over too many things.

I have to keep it straight and real with you in order to try to successfully shock your system.

There are a lot of narcissists that think you're stupid and I I'm when I'm doing my one on ones, there are people that say that to me.

They must think I'm stupid and I'll say yes, they are.

They do think you're stupid.

I'm not saying you stupid.

They think you are.

They think that you're going to believe this stupid ass stuff that this stupid ass dumbass story that they told you.

They think that you're going to do that.

They believe that you're going to do that right.

They truly, truly, truly believe that you're going to go above and beyond and do that type of stuff right there.

That's what they're thinking right now in this moment in time.

They truly think that right now, right?

So that's where we that's where we go wrong right there.

You see what I'm saying?

They think you're stupid.

I'm not calling you stupid.

They just think you are.

Got it.

So there again, there's some narcissists that don't think you're done, but others the way the others feel, man, get the hell out of here.

Some of them absolutely lose their minds when they think you're done for good.

Will you go no contact?

Will you, if you change your number, if you finally block them, if they, if y'all have iPhones and that message turns Green Man, that message turns Green Man.

They lose they damn minds.

They lose it.

They lose their minds, I promise you.

And once they lose their minds, there is nothing you can do.

I promise you.

Of course, you got to stay no contact.

But there's nothing they can do to stop the minds from shifting and thinking about.

Because once they think you're done, once they think you're done for good and you go to them, the mind automatically shifts to you being with someone else.

You don't have to have someone else, right?

You might you.

Maybe you do.

Because sometimes you disconnect before they do, right?

You disconnect before the narcissist does, and that's OK.

You know, you disconnect before they do, and then you break up with them and you leave them and you've had you find somebody else quickly.

That doesn't make you a narcissist.

I actually talked to a woman about probably about a year ago that we had a conversation about that.

She's like Lee.

I disconnected from my narcissistic ex a year before I left.

And about about a month after I left for good, I found somebody else and I'm happy.

Oh, yeah.

I can see how my videos might point you in direction, might make you think you're an artist because you moved on quickly.

But you didn't move on quickly.

You moved on a year before, just emotionally.

But you're still physically with them, trying to disconnect for good.

But yeah, they automatically think that you're with someone else.

That's where the mind goes.

Because it's like, it can't, yeah, it can't be me.

It just can't be me.

It can't be me.

It can't be my fault how this stuff is going, right?

It absolutely cannot be who I am and what's been going on in this situation, right?

It really cannot be that.

You know what I mean?

It truly, they can't not take accountability for what they've done, which is why when they try to come back, it doesn't work out.

They'll make these promises to change.

They'll say this and they'll say that, but will they actually change?

No, right, because they can't.

They haven't taken accountability because they're putting it on to you.

They're putting all the blame squirrely on your empathetic shoulders.

That's what be happening right there.

They're putting the blame all on you.

They're telling you that you did this, you did that, blah blah blah, Boo Boo Boo Boo BBB.

They're putting it all on you.

And you know damn well it's not on you.

You know damn well that is not your fault.

You didn't do anything to this person.

This is on them.

Like they treated you horribly and you decided to leave.

But they automatically do think you with somebody else.

Hey, I don't make the rules.

That's just where the mind goes.

Because it's like in order to make myself, in order to make myself feel better, when somebody leaves me, I have to pacify myself.

And the quickest way for me to pacify myself and make myself feel better is to just blame you and put it on you and say, hey, you're the cheater.

Hey, you left me for somebody else.

Hey, you found somebody else.

It's not me like you.

I did.

I did everything I could do.

I treated you as good as I could treat you.

It still wasn't enough.

It's on you.

They'll put it on to you.

They'll directly put it on to you.

So again, this is where the mind goes right here.

They put it on to you.

They blame you and they automatically assume that you have someone else.

And that's why somehow they'll they'll straight up tell you.

They'll tell you you must have someone else.

It must be someone else.

Why don't you just tell me who it is?

Tell me who it is so I can, I can go fight him.

Tell me who it is.

I can go beat the ass.

Tell me who it is.

Yeah.

They'll automatically lose their minds and think you were with somebody else.

You know what I mean, right?

Another thing that a lot of narcissists will do when you finally call the quiz is if they haven't already, they'll move on quickly.

You know that that's this typical I go, if they haven't done it already, they will be the ones to absolutely move on quickly.

They will be the ones that do this type of stuff move on very quickly and disappear on you like or not disappear on you.

They'll move on very quickly to try to pacify themselves, just like I stated in the previous kind of the previous section, how to pacify themselves by saying you found somebody else.

They will also pacify themselves by saying, hey, look, you're the cheater, you're the liar, you're the manipulator.

You did this, you did that.

All of this is on you.

They'll just move on quickly.

They'll love bomb the hell out of somebody else.

They'll find somebody else to absolutely love bomb and lose their minds on, lose their minds with.

This is where they'll go with everything.

I promise you.

This is how the mind goes.

This is how they operate.

This is the internal, this is the internal functioning system of narcissistic people.

They absolutely put it directly onto you.

They do.

They put it onto you.

They'll say, hey, you did this.

Hey, look, you did that.

Hey, look, this is what's going on, blah, blah, blah, BBB, you know what I mean?

But that's the mindset.

They'll find somebody else.

They'll move on quickly.

But guess what?

Just because they move on quickly doesn't mean that they forgot about you.

That's what This is why This is why I get right here.

I get this a lot in one on ones too.

Well, people would just say, hey, Lee, I know I'm the one that left.

I know I'm the one that ended the relationship, but the fact that they moved on quickly, it still hurts.

It's not about you.

It's about them trying to feel better.

They're trying to find a way to feel better and the the quickest way to validate themselves and to feel better in a lot of these situations after blaming you or before blaming you or including blaming you is to find somebody else.

Hey, if somebody else wants me, I can't be the problem.

If there's somebody else out there that wants me, it can't be me.

I cannot be the problem because somebody else wants me.

So sometimes the narcissist finds a new supply, not because they are in love or because they want a new because they're, you know what I'm saying, They find somebody else's just validate their existence.

I can't self validate.

It's very difficult for a narcissist to self validate.

So they have to find an external source.

And a lot of times the external source is a a new person.

So if somebody else wants me, it can't be me, right?

If somebody else wants me, it can't be my fault that you got away.

You see what I'm saying?

That's where it goes.

If there's somebody else out there that wants to be with me, then it must be your fault.

It can't be me.

I'm good because someone else wants me.

So a lot of times when you call the quiz for good, they'll do this type of stuff.

And another thing that they'll do when they when you call the quiz for good is y'all better be y'all.

Some of y'all probably already experienced this, but if you haven't experienced this and you are experiencing it right now, watch.

I'll put that damn smear campaign because it's coming.

If you haven't already gotten that smear campaign, you know damn well it's coming.

That smear campaign is deep.

This smear campaign is fierce.

That smear campaign is terrible.

It's coming.

It might be already here, you know, but it might already be here.

They're going to lie.

They're going to spread rumors.

They're going to say you did what they did.

They're going to just try to, they, they're going to do a lot of different things.

Of course they're going to do a lot of different things in order to try to make themselves feel better or in order to try to get ahead of you.

They think that you're going to do what they do what they are doing.

So they're trying to get ahead of you.

They think you're going to expose them.

So they try to expose you first, right?

They try to put the lies and stuff out there before you get an opportunity to.

So you're battling their lies.

You see what I'm saying?

That's what ends up happening, y'all.

So if you call the quiz for good, of course they're going to try to find somebody else.

They're going to start a smear campaign.

But again, y'all know some of them will lose their minds and start stalking the hell out of you.

The stalker, scary ass narcissist, they out there too.

They'll stalk the hell out of you to put fear into your heart in order to scare the hell out of you and make you, you know what I'm saying?

They'll keep stalking you so you don't move on.

If you call it quits, you turn, You disconnect your phone number, You file a retraining order.

It doesn't.

Retraining order is just a piece of paper, y'all.

It's just a legal precedent.

It's just legal stuff legally doesn't stop them physically.

You still need to protect yourself.

Even if you get a restraining order, protective order, whatever, no contact order, you still have to protect yourself because again, that's just somebody else telling them what to do.

And you know, narcis, that doesn't work on most narcis.

Most narcis, I'm not going to be told what to do.

They're not going to listen to somebody else and whatnot.

So some of them will stalk you, harass you, and do all kinds of other stuff in order to try again to make themselves feel better because you hurt their feelings.

You broke their little narcissistic hearts, you done a number on their asses and they can't stand it.

You know what I mean?

So be very careful.

Y'all, when you call the quits for good.

I'll say this in in closing y'all, when you call the quits for good, you need to be done for good.

Because if you break no contact and you go back to them again after you've ghosted them, after you've changed your phone number, after you've moved, what's the point?

You'd have moved, change your phone number, all to just give them the phone number and give them your address again.

You wasted this to waste the opportunity.

You don't move again or change your phone number again, you know what I'm saying?

You put your kids in danger again.

Come on now baby, we gotta wake up, we gotta wake up, we gotta wake up, we gotta stay up, y'all.

Anyways, y'all hit the subscribe button, turn on those notifications if you haven't already again because the podcast is launching and y'all not going to want to miss any episode of the podcast.

Y'all hit the subscribe button and I'm out.

Peace.