Ashley (00:00) Welcome everyone to the leading lane podcast. We're here what the week before Thanksgiving. It snowed here on like five inches two days ago, which is gross. But I think that there has been a lot going on in the world a lot going on in our personal lives with clients and friends and agents. And I think it was just a good opportunity to maybe talk about when you are feeling overwhelmed, you know, Basically things you can do just as agents. A lot of times we have to unexpectedly step away. I had to for a surgery a couple of weeks ago. You've had to for personal appointments and it is really hard for all of us that are control freaks, I think. And like things done a certain way, but I do think it's important to take a step back and just realize that maybe we're not actually providing the best service when we're under those situations and really the importance of systems and asking for help. ⁓ So I think as we're heading into the holiday season, it might be a good opportunity to talk about those things. Steven L. Burch (01:04) Yeah, you know, I think the first thing that I've learned over the years is that the only thing that I can control truly is me. And that's it. Right. And so as much as I want to say that I'm a control freak, I can't control everything or everyone by any means. That's not that's not what this is about. This is about what you can control for yourself. And I think that that's something that's not talked about enough in business and really in society. And then that goes into boundaries. What is, what is going to be good for you and what is not good for you and don't allow others to cross over into those boundaries, stay unfirm to what your boundaries are. So yeah. And I think it's, we have multiple situations that we were talking about before we even started recording. ⁓ but it's just crazy to really think that, you know, the, feel I've always said that the Give them an inch they're gonna take a mile and I think that when you start working with more and more people you're growing your business more clients more agents more sales more whatever you're doing if You give an inch to every single person how much of yourself? How many how much of your boundaries are you giving up? And now it's just all over the place and there are no boundaries because you're giving exceptions Left and right without making the exception to the rule be all about yourself Ashley (02:05) Yep. Yeah. And I think that having ⁓ my recent surgery was kind of, ⁓ I seeing about it last night. Like those are boundaries that I literally could do nothing about, ⁓ along with the follow-up appointments, know, they're going to half hours away. but it was also kind of amazing to me that nothing fell apart when I, you know, I mean, like people, sure. There were a people that were like, what do mean you're not available that day? you know, but. So was basically three Wednesdays in a row that I couldn't be available. And the world didn't fall apart. The transactions didn't fall apart. You know, I was very upfront with everyone. Like I'm just not going to be available tomorrow. If anything, you know, you need a media assistance, is to contact. And I mean, everyone was fine and we're all doing good. But I think what that made me just think about a little bit more was why can't I do that outside of needing to go to the doctor? Steven L. Burch (03:27) It's tough because we're wired and we naturally want to be the helper or the fixer or you know just take control let me do it type of thing but when we have no other option like Ashley (03:29) Right? Steven L. Burch (03:43) That's when we, I mean, obviously are forced to be able to do it. But I think the more times that we have those no other options, it opens our eyes a little bit more and more and more to seeing what really is happening. Because sometimes we have blinders on, have a little, what is it, nose blind. You can't really smell the odor and the air anymore. And you have to be able to step away for a bit to be able to see what really is. could be improved upon or really needs your focus first. And a lot of times what you're discovering, in my opinion, what you're discovering are things that you would not see if you're down in the weeds on the day to day. You look at it from a different perspective and see different opportunities that you can focus on. And I think that the big thing I'm not speaking for you by any means, but the big thing is knowing that you and I both have not been like this all the time, right? We have, we're always the, we used to be the go, go, go, put our head down. does not matter every single time. And, but we realized that's not what we want for our future. And it's that realization of I can't continue to do this forever. My health, my mental health, right? Like all of these things. So it's important even when you're in the weeds to still find those opportunities to be able to say, if I improve this system, just a little bit more, the next time that something happens in life. then it's gonna go a little bit better. And it's like a compound effect. It's building Legos and it's putting one on top of the other versus trying to go and build the whole freaking house all at the same, know, one time. It's just one step at a time. And it's the small little actions that are truly have huge impact in your business. When people are trying to look for the easy button, they're missing out on the things that can really be the baseline and functionality of your whole operations. Ashley (05:35) Well, I think you've used the term like hit by a bus plan a lot recently, which I used the other day with someone. And I think that, you know, we all think we're invincible. We're not right. And I think that when you start to maybe think about that a little bit more, like, if I got hit by a bus yesterday, like, could people pick up the pieces? Like, like, do I have Steven L. Burch (05:39) Yeah. Ashley (05:59) Are the files up to date? Does all the contact information, right? Because a lot of times we're just working off our brain, off of our sticky notes everywhere. So I think it really is, ⁓ you know, just something that you need to focus on going into the new year. think it's just, is there that hit by bus plan, not just regarding your files, but again, we always talk about too, like your wills and your plans and all of that, cause none of us do have a crystal ball, but you know, then it is, it gives some, someone the ability to help you, right? So if your files are kind of ready and you do have to step away unexpectedly, someone can just hop in, take over, get it done for you, right? Hand it right back when you come over. But I think that that's where we all again, like that control freak of we want our files a certain way, et cetera, but maybe it's not the best way. So think it's also just being open to hearing from other people, being open to letting people, you know, help you and learning new things and learning new systems that in all reality, you know, should buy some time back, I think. You know, there's a lot of AI things going on, which I still believe that AI will never replace a realtor in the transaction. But I mean, AI could really help, you know, streamline some processes so that you can not feel so overwhelmed if you have to step away or assign duties. Steven L. Burch (07:17) And you know, before when people were talking about systems and processes and things, like, I only automatically went to like, what app is that? What system, what tool? And really the simplistic way to say it is you are the system. And so what we're trying to do is duplicate and replicate yourself, right? And. Just think how the impact that you're gonna have like if you are this successful you do this well at selling real estate whatever you're doing in your industry and You are able to pass down and teach people other people your tricks your trade your model of how you became so successful Like how many people you're now able to bring up with you and be able to have a larger impact in the world and your business and sales, right? So I think it's making sure that I think at the beginning, I was trying to hold on to everything. I don't want to share my secrets. don't want, I don't want somebody to, you know, come in and steal my, how I do stuff. The reality is nobody can steal you, right? Like they are still going to be different. You're just showing them the paths, the processes that you have to be able to help you be who you are to be in front of other people. So I think it's just a matter of the outreach. and the handoff and the documentation. And I think that's really the hardest part is how do we take it out of our brain? Like we know how to do it. It's just it's like clockwork for us. So I slow myself down enough to say step one, this is what I do. And I used to get so irritated when I worked in corporate America, when you call IT and you're having an issue, the number one thing that they would say Ashley (08:49) I do it in my sleep. Steven L. Burch (09:05) Did you turn it off and then turn it back on? Is it plugged in? Right? Like they are starting from the baseline and it pissed me off so much, you know, when that was happening. But the reality is you have to start that simplistic of what is step one, because your step one of where you think it should be can be somebody else's step seven. And they miss all this first part, which now messes up the whole process. And I think the other thing here too, that I really want to hone in on and I know you're going there was Like asking for help. And the other part of this is providing help, you know, in making sure that if you see somebody struggling, say something, and it doesn't mean that you have to do something for them. You know, it's a simple, simple thing. Hey, is there any, what can I do to help you? How can I help you? What can I take off of your plate or where can I help support you? ⁓ there's a of different ways that you can ask that question. And again, I don't think in this world we, we hear that. Ashley (09:53) Thank Steven L. Burch (10:05) quite enough because everybody's all in this go mode and not slowing down to help one another when truly, that's what we're all here for in my opinion, is to help one another, to lift each other up. Ashley (10:16) know a lot of people feel, well speaking for myself, a lot of people ⁓ feel guilty when they ask for help, ⁓ you know, because you feel like you're imposing on someone. I'm super thankful for the office culture that we've had that I mean, people are like, literally like, let me help you, what can I do, you know? ⁓ I know you like to reference the Devil Wears Prada, which Devil Wears Prada number two is coming out soon. ⁓ You know, but the whole point, and I've gone over this with my admins is, Like I want them to be one step ahead of me, right? So that, like I was going to do this or I need to do this. And then it was already done because they know the expectations, right? But if you don't set the clear expectations, somebody can't necessarily help you get to that next step. So again, another opportunity for AI to help, you know, SOPs, et cetera. Steven L. Burch (11:08) And you know, I think you sent me a prompt for ChatGPT. ⁓ And it basically was a series of questions. So having ChatGPT interview you with a series of questions, one question at a time, ⁓ and only asking 10 questions, I think the total was. But my outcome that I was looking for is tell me things in the operational business side of things. that I'm not seeing my blindsiders or things that I am holding the company back on. And it like interviewed me and the answers were a little bit. You can't lie. Like a little, ⁓ reality check for sure. Yeah. ⁓ but right there that shows you, you know, there's a tool to be able to help you lean into figuring out what do I need to focus on first? so I think AI is. Ashley (11:53) close for comfort. Steven L. Burch (12:06) I'm here for it. I love it. Any way that I can use it and I'm all about it. Ashley (12:10) Yeah, I just signed up for this AI summit that I am really interested in seeing what comes out of it. um, you know, I think, this will probably be everyone goes the extremes on this, but I'll see like these real estate groups and a lot of people will say like, um, do you take a day off? Like, uh, do you tell your clients and a lot of agents will write, you're not a realtor unless you're available 365, seven days a week. And I see that a ton. And I am always just. Steven L. Burch (12:36) Bye. Ashley (12:40) amazed like that that is some people's train of thought. I mean, to each their own, but I do feel like, you know, that's an expectation that you set up with your clients from beginning to like, I'm not normally available, you know, after I mean, mine's getting closer and closer to like after 8pm, you know, weekend, Sunday, whatever that might be. But I think, you know, putting out this persona that realtors need to be available 24 seven, I think is unhealthy. I tell people like, What other career is that normal? You know, we're not, we're not dealing with life and death type situations, you nine times out of 10. Um, you know, so think it's just that notation. know a lot of people feel very strongly about that, but I don't think that it needs to be that way by any means. I remember when I first started, like, you know, it's different when you're, you're hungry and I'm not hungry, but right. Like you needed checks to pay your bills, et cetera. And I think. like someone was adamant about looking at houses on Christmas. And I mean, I said that I would, but thankfully it worked out cause the seller was like, I'm not letting someone in my home on Christmas and nor should you be not me spent, know, right? So that was a good refresher or a good reminder for me that like, it's not just me and me, it's the seller that has to redo their schedules, et cetera. And I mean, really if someone is, is that adamant. You know, not to be able to be available the day after, like I just then have concerns about how the rest of the transaction is going to be. But that's also when I tell people like, maybe those aren't the right people for you. I've had people like that and I'll just say, you know what? think another agent might be a better fit and more power to you if you want to work around the clock. Steven L. Burch (14:17) And again, it goes back to the boundaries. And I think what happens is again, as you tighten those boundaries up, you're yes, you're protecting yourself, which means that those people that are not a right fit for you are not allowing them in your circle, right? You know, refer them to somebody else, whatever the case may be. But now you're generally working with people that respect your respect, you respect your boundaries now and how much of a healthier environment that truly is when you can get rid of that. toxic or the negativity or unrealistic expectations that we cannot commit to. There's no way. Ashley (14:53) I that's where like those, you know, I talk about, I mean, a good chunk of my friends I would have never met had it not been for, you know, real estate. I mean, a good, good portion of people in my life, including you. And I just think, you know, like if you do make the time for the right people, like those are the people that you then do get to keep, you know, as part of your life that you go to their family events and go to their Thanksgiving and go to their kids' things, right? And then it's making more time for those people, which Not that you're doing that for business purposes, but they will serve their purpose, right? Like they will tell people to work with you, those types of things, versus spending all this time and effort to someone that doesn't respect your boundaries. They're never gonna change, and they're not gonna be your referral person either. Steven L. Burch (15:38) Not at all. Not at all. I mean, it's all about like you, whatever you put in, you know, get, get it back in return. And so I really focused on that as far as if I'm working with good people, I know that return eventually is going to come back. Not necessarily monetarily, but like the vibes, the energy, all the goodness that I want to be. ⁓ so it starts with you first, always, no matter what we're talking about. ⁓ but the more that you're able to help others first and then they'll come back to you when you need help. when you need to look at yourself, you start with yourself, of seeing those flaws or those opportunities, if you will. And once you start correcting yourself, you now can then see and make more space for the people that you need in your life. So, absolutely. Ashley (16:23) I think one good thing going into the holidays to think about too is so that you can give yourself a little bit of a buffer is just, you know, look at the next 45 days. There's basically three holidays. ⁓ and like, look to see what's due in those timeframes, right? So like, is there anything that might fall on Thanksgiving or the day after that you can take care of beforehand? Same with Christmas and New Year's like, you know, reach out to any sellers or buyers that you need to before. Thanksgiving, Christmas, etc. So that then really all questions are answered, all buyers are set, everybody's set so that basically everyone can enjoy the holidays. They likely don't want to be contacted if they're with family and friends either. So maybe just being a little bit more proactive with your database ahead of the holiday. Steven L. Burch (17:06) My theme lately has been with my team, be proactive, not reactive. And what you were talking about earlier about with your team, you know, with as far as what you want them to be a step ahead of you. Like really what we're trying to do is get them to anticipate your next move. And we all... Ashley (17:13) Mm-hmm. Steven L. Burch (17:27) as much as we don't want to admit it, we are all creatures of habit. And so when we say that, you know, I'm too busy, I'm stuck, you know, whatever the story, the bullshit story that we're telling ourselves, if you slow down and see what your habits are, what you're repeating, you can find all of this pretty darn quickly, in my opinion, to be able to focus on bettering yourself and bettering those around you as well. Ashley (17:54) 100%. Steven L. Burch (17:56) I love it. Well, good chat. Happy Thanksgiving and yeah, tune in next time. Ashley (18:01) everything's doing.