A podcast to honor the gods.

This better come with a sacrifice.

Dave X Media.

Welcome to The Bids, hosted by your favorite Jam buds, Robert.

And Charlie?

Hey, hey, Charlie.

You know what, this episode, it could, it could have been great.

It could have been so great, right?

God, let's hollow out the earth, guys.

Let's hollow out the earth and hell yeah make make earth uninhabitable for the life on it.

Holy shit, who was that it?

Was a little voice.

Oh no, A.

Delightful little laugh a a wild podcaster has appeared.

Hi friends.

Yo, it's Ray.

Ray's back.

Is Ray.

We love them.

You know who Ray is, you know they're pronouns, you know what they do on the Internet, All that jazz, right?

Right.

You know, you know.

We love them.

Gay sex in church.

Let's get out of the way.

Yeah, yeah.

Just just drop that on real quick.

I you know what?

I don't remember the context of the original.

Like when you told us like, oh, sometimes the thing about gay sex in church, I don't remember the initial conversation.

There are context where that makes sense.

What context could possibly no just?

Talking about religious trauma or something I feel like.

So I feel like we were talking about what do you used?

To pull up that O tag episode and be like what the fuck were we talking about?

Was it even on O tag?

It must.

Have it was on tag it.

Was OK.

It was absolutely.

But yeah, right, you're here.

You do podcasts with this one sometime it's it's.

We we, we read some Rick Riordan books.

You all know the drill.

It it's pretty fun.

It's pretty cool, Riordan.

Pretty good author.

Yeah, that guy.

You know that guy, Uncle Rick?

That guy, that guy, Uncle Rick, Hey.

Ray, why'd you pick this episode?

I honestly don't remember, but cool.

I'm I'm happy to be here.

I'm I'm glad to have a Paradot episode, you know I had.

You down for it, so I assumed that you picked it probably.

Well that seems to track.

I think I remember the last episode Ray was on was also like I don't remember why I picked this but I vibe.

Wait the the last episode I know Ray knew why they picked it because it was the IT was the nightmare hospital.

It was Connie sword fighting arc.

So the last two were were connected in some way.

I don't know what this one what, what you were drawn to in this episode.

I have a game theory, it comes from this episode.

So a game theory I do.

In what?

A game theory.

OK, I have.

I miss Matpat.

Rest in peace, Matpat.

Yeah, sometimes I can still hear his voice, so.

OK, you want to know my fun gem theory?

Yeah, gems have perfect pitch, naturally.

OK, I was about to say.

Like.

Literally we go into the episode and Peridot has perfect pitch.

She doesn't know what music is.

And I was just like, what does what does this mean?

What does this mean?

OK, crystals resonate like with pure tones, so this makes sense to me.

Scientifically.

It feels like it tracks and also there's other hints throughout the show.

I feel like in the extended theme song clip Greg mentions that Steven picked up the ukulele like insanely quickly like this is.

True, I remember that.

Yeah, gems.

They they just have perfect pitch.

This is a thing, I swear to you.

I was just like, is this just Peridot immediately like picking up like what Steven is putting down because he he did all of the notes and then I was like, does she just remember them immediately?

That's kind of how I think I'm a great mimic when it comes to that.

That was something we found out very quickly when I was first taking music lessons.

It's like you're very good at matching the the notes.

You're not so good at singing them on your own.

I'm like and that's why I'm here to learn.

But like the fact that she's never heard a chord before and she's able to pick out all four notes in every single chord like.

Yeah, Paradox got the Super the Super nerd emergency.

But I mean, every gem does.

That's what I'm saying.

Hell yeah, brother gems.

Are autistic.

A little bit either autistic or gay or both.

Or both same gay.

Autistic and non binary I love I love this for them.

But because I haven't said it yet, we are looking today at Season 2 Episode 24, It Could Have Been Gray, which premiered on January 6th, 2016.

Oh hey guys, this is this.

This date is not important.

The only importance is that this episode of Steven Universe came out right.

Yeah, yeah, that's the most important thing about this.

This date is that Steven Universe happens.

Oh God to.

Me, that's all this that matters so.

Right, that is all that matters to me too.

Before we see you, Charlie the postman, bring us any post.

No tears if he hasn't.

Guess what?

Guess what?

Oh shit.

Guess what?

Oh shit.

Hey Mr.

Postman, bring me a post.

Bring me the post I love the most.

I feel like this always happens when I'm on specifically like I'm your magic post lucky charm.

We we got this a couple days ago.

Actually, I feel like we got this like right after recorded the last episode, which is hilarious to me.

We got a very long e-mail from somebody who finally caught up.

Robert, if you would like to, we could always like swap paragraph a paragraph or something this is.

Sure, sure.

The fun one.

Oh boy.

Let me pull up the boy, James.

Best, right?

Holy shit, James, you sent a fucking manifesto.

Are you going to shoot us like God damn?

Yes.

I think some of the paragraphs I was skimming in, it's just like if it's an italics, you don't have to read it because I know this is a monster, but I feel like we're going to read it.

I feel like that's going to happen.

I'm so sorry for how long this post is.

I promise that future posts will not be this long.

Hello Jam buds, my name is James Best and I hail from Robert's February guesting of the newest Olympian.

Hell yeah.

As opposed to the one from last year as I somehow did not register them mentioning this podcast the first time.

Otherwise I would have sent posts a lot sooner.

Now that I'm officially caught up, this podcast will be add it to the weekly podcast Friday queue, right right Wait to the week to the weekly podcast Friday queue right after Tino Tino is on Monday, my guy, The other podcasts in the queue are so alright, I'm gonna pretend like I know what ANMA is what happens if I just.

I don't know popular podcasts, I just know my little fandom podcast section podcast.

Anma.

And like all the PGO people, the.

Anarchy me Anything podcast.

Maybe.

I I hope.

Hey, sorry.

James, James, you're going to have to tell us about this.

Tell us about your podcast.

What do you listen to?

Can you give us some 100?

Percent and 100% eat.

The joke here is that they're all podcasts normally from Mr.

Oh, yeah, OK, so no, I can have that cause 'cause that's yeah.

George Ramsey and Gustavo Sor Sorola.

Yeah, that's OK.

I get it.

I get the bit.

Speaking of thoughts on Ruby, Robert, how far did you get in the series?

I only ever got to like, the second, the end of the second season.

I've kept up with the news about Ruby and like the subsequent seasons and like what?

Every big twist or big shock for the fans is like a spoiler for Ruby.

I was there at Ground Zero when Yang lost her arm.

I only ever watched three seasons of it so.

That was the time.

Still, the premise kind.

Of when or the Blake Yankis that was That was huge on Tumblr.

Yeah, I remember that because I'm also on Tumblr.

I know it's cute anime girls and also dead moms.

I highly recommend pre reading this post because even as I am writing it, I didn't I don't know how much bullshit I'm about to put into this.

I'd hate to take up a lot of time and leave a bad impression.

James, you're fine.

You're absolutely fine.

This is going to be the highlight of our week.

So we we got posts that's great.

They're they're saying that things that I tell us can be skipped, but are we going to skip them?

I feel like that's not going to happen so.

I would like to become a frequent poster as a as a precursor to becoming a patron, which is also a precursor to guessing on the pod.

Yes, if you do $20.00 a month, you sign yourself up to be a guest in a future episode of the bitspatreon.com/the Bits SU pod, which would fulfill a bucket list item even.

I also need to read this paragraph.

Even with a full time job as a mechanic, I am broke as hell to the point where I don't even have $20 disposable income.

It's ridiculous.

I love working on cards, but I hate that my trade is easily affected by the state of the economy.

I work 50 hours a week to walk away with only 30 hours pay.

Hell yeah brother, we love.

We love taxes.

We don't love taxes because none of the people can afford to have their cars work done for me to see the minimum.

Also that like I imagine you know, hey, there's like a quote I have to meet which sucks.

I'm sorry my friend.

Well, I hope and and urine to one day appear as a guest.

I am also mortified at the idea of a fucking up on live recording.

Don't worry, I do that every single time.

B not having meaningful input to the episode.

Literally everybody worries about that.

It's it's fine we got you and C should quality audio that also you know it's par for the course it just happens sometimes.

Or you can get a microphone.

Microphones are great.

I barely have a fully functioning laptop mood, let alone a microphone or knowledge to utilize recording software.

I've touched audacity like 3 times with the and Steven tier of the Patreon.

Has there been any thought of the logistics of having a guest on?

Would you do something like a test run?

Does the quality of the guest audio actually matter for you?

I'm very curious about how all that would go down.

I've we've had people on this podcast who have not the best audio and luckily for us, we record with a software called Zencaster, which does allow the cleanup for me.

And then I'm no enough audio editing that I can clean up anything else possible.

For the most part, you'll be fine if you if you pay the end Stevens here and you want to come up with and you want to come on for an episode, we'll figure out your audio.

We also might like, I don't know, ask you to send us like a recording or something.

And if you're guesting on a podcast like this, you don't have to worry about audio software.

Like you're not going to be doing any editing.

That's all in post.

Yeah, that's all me.

That's all, that's all Robert shit you you gotta make Robert sweat and have terrible audio just for them to have to edit I.

Try to make it sound good.

I try and keep the silences out.

I found not finally, because everyone always and like and like James here will will will be like, oh, yeah, I agree.

And it's something that Mike talks about in his pockets a lot that like the secret is like he has a bunch of audio software.

Whatever.

The main secret to what a good podcast is, apparently, is cutting out as many silences as possible.

I use truncate silence on audacity like.

Truncate silence is.

My best friend like if we're if we do like an hour and a half, the truncate silence will take out like 1520 minutes and like.

Yes, it's great.

It's amazing.

It's.

Great.

It's amazing because you know, that saves me so much time because I used to do that shit manually and but also like leaving that silence in straight up feels rude to a listener.

Like I'm not going to waste people's time.

I'm not going to waste 20 minutes of your time with silence.

Yeah.

Fuck no.

Darien is currently my favorite guest on the podcast and I want to see all functions for spelling their name wrong in my comment on Jailbreak.

I will likely go back and listen to that episode over and over again as time goes on.

Drunk Darien spoke directly into my queer soul.

2nd place goes to Kayla.

Kayla.

Damn it, I'm keeping that in.

I fucked up.

Every time.

Every fucking time.

Also I'm doing.

Good for a while, but I'm a little I'm a little tipsy right now, so you're going to have to pardon.

Me, James, I, I, I remember seeing that comment on on the episode and I definitely shared it in our group chat with Dariot, who was like RIP my name, but also like hearted it because they, they loved your, your comment so.

Quote Dariot indirectly.

We sent her the photo and she's like, ah, bitch spelled my name wrong.

We love you, James.

It doesn't matter.

But yeah, if you want a little, a little behind the scenes sneak peek at to the group chats, we name because like we have little group chats to be like, oh, hey, your episode's coming up.

Would you like to set up a recording time?

And we have that for every guest.

So like for example for when Phoebe's on our group chat is called donut bits or when we have Ethan on it's mystery in the bits or.

Anybody who has a podcast I try to do a riff on like that with both of the podcast names this started.

The one with Rey is called of the eldest bits.

You know, you know how this bit started, Robert, is when I got Monster Doughnut on of the Eldest Gods and I was just like, I'm going to call this the eldest doughnut collab, so.

That's a good one.

Speaking of queer, how the fuck do gender?

Me too bro, me too.

Big mood.

Get that tattooed on my forehead.

How the fuck do gender?

I cannot for the life of me figure this shit out.

My gender is envy and my pronouns are I slash wish mood.

I'm gonna pick the audio just for you, Robert.

I can't figure out how I want to be perceived, and it's mostly because I am at ridiculous levels of mass presenting.

I want to straight up shape shift.

I want to straight up shape shift and look like everyone else around me instead of myself.

How to know you're trans TM?

You get asked the question hey what superpower would you have?

Shape shifting.

I always said flight.

I also said flight but like second place would be a shape shift thing.

When I started figuring some shit out, it definitely became more shape shifting because you know, flight is just added on to that, you know?

Right, Right.

Well, you're on the anamorph shit.

Yeah, I have kind of the opposite problem, because I'm AFAB and thick as hell and it's really inconvenient, Right, Right.

Issue, we're in the same boat, right?

We're in the absolute same boat.

You've met me in person.

We're we got, we got the thick booties, we got the thick thighs.

It sucks, man.

How dare I have a figure?

What am I supposed to do with all this?

My gender.

My gender is actually the opposite of yours, James.

It's I do not want to be perceived.

A a joke sometimes I'll have with Charlie is that like in their bio, they'll be like, you know, ask my pronouns and I'll be like, Charlie, what are your pronouns today?

And they'll be like, I don't know, just don't look at me.

This used to be a thing that I would do in college.

I was just like, yeah, like I go by like she and he pronouns ask me which ones based on the day.

And then you had to pick, oh man, this one's a nice marriage.

Alex Fiero era of of existence just so y'all get the reference but God damn.

Yeah, I do.

I am like kind of gender fluidy I think.

And I do like kind of have preferences depending on the time, but like actually having to like do the introspection to like decide every day never.

Sometimes I would be like, I want to wear this outfit.

So I think these are going to be the pronouns today, like kind.

Of basically.

That.

I just generally vibe with them and I'm like, I'm an egg, I'm a BLOB.

But I will be very quick to be like, Oh yeah man, dude, he, him.

I'm a dude when it is funny or convenient.

Yeah, yeah.

Has no gender.

I'm a man when funnier, convenient.

Bro.

Bro that's just flirting at that point.

You can call your romantic partner dude bro homie.

Hey homie, how's it hanging?

Charles, please, my partner listens to this.

Oh, I know, I know.

Your partner listens to it and you're you're really, really gay, as you've mentioned several times.

I, I I like Hi Mac.

Hey Charles, I'm Mac.

Charlie says hi.

I love Mac.

You have to leave that in the recording.

I I know that that got picked up because I could hear it slightly.

Yeah.

It's required.

And then hey, spoilers for the the guests.

He's going to be the guest for the next episode because that is the first appearance of Yellow Diamond AKA Patti Lupone.

Hey, AKA the the the the giraffe the the space giraffe.

AKA my boyfriend is such a fucking theater nerd.

And the second, I remember when he was first watching the show and he was like Patti Lupone.

And I'm like, yeah, that's I'm here for my important.

I think, I don't know if I've already mentioned this on here, but when I was watching Agatha all along I was like where do I know you from?

And I was like, Oh my God, Stevie universe.

Yellow Diamond I'm hailing for my important business e-mail addressed as opposed to my personal one because I would rather be made of fun of for having a Hotmail account despite being born in 2000, as opposed to being made fun of or what I for what I chose is the name of my Gmail account, both of which were registered when I was like 13.

I'm not going to read out your e-mail account or the full name you left off at the end for obvious fucking reasons.

But you know, I also have a Hotmail somewhere in the void that I yeah, my.

First e-mail was a Hotmail and I have forgotten what it even was so.

You heard it here first folks.

Ray deals with Hotmail all the time.

James I still use like the same username that I used when I was like, I I don't fucking know how old like 8 or 9 or some shit like oh.

God.

God, when whenever the fuck that this game called VMK existed, that is when I created Green Pixie.

Originally it was Green Pixie Gal, and now it's just Green Pixie 12.

But yeah, that's what I created my Internet username thing.

So because Tinkerbell, because I'm obsessed, Tinkerbell, she's life.

So we're all merits here actually.

Why haven't you had a Tinkerbell podcast yet?

OK.

One, there's the content for that is like not as concentrated as some of the other things that I talk about.

I mean, that seems like a quick.

Short little extra podcast to do like hey to bring like.

Unless I go through every single book in the there's.

All the books and there's all the not you can do that really quick.

Hey, to bring it back to Mike Schubert real quick, he recently released a podcast of him watching the Fast and Furious movies for the first time and like, he just Dun Dun Dun quick in like 10 episodes or whatever.

So hey, do the same thing for a Tinkerbell.

I would just be gushing because she's everything.

She's perfect.

She's Mae Whitman.

I'm better than no man, but sometimes I have seen like especially around like Halloween, the slutty Tinkerbell outfits and I'm like, oh, I'm not strong, I'm weak.

You don't even need a slutty Tinkerbell outfit.

Her actual outfit is so slutty.

OK and not OK.

There's a reason I'm gay.

Charlie let me appreciate the human body, damn it.

All right.

No, she's a fairy.

She's a fairy, damn it.

So Connie is my favorite human character, followed by Sadie, with Stevani being my favorite all around character, mostly because of the gender reasons.

Hell yeah.

Seeing them always makes me feel fuzzy and warm inside and I love them so much.

Garnet is my favorite gem.

I used to have a shirt that said True kind of love because that song made me cry so bad in the movie streaming.

Tears like a.

Sit with a straight face.

And then Peridot, because of course.

And then Lapis because she's pretty.

And then Bismuth.

Fucking love Bismuth.

Yeah, just I think, I think you've named all the characters at this point.

I think that's all of them except Steven and Pearl.

So lastly, because I'm the car guy, I would like to ask your guys thoughts on cars.

What's your favorite dream car?

I promise I won't judge unless it's the Kia, Hyundai, or Tesla.

Have you ever had questions about your car?

Do you ever get frustrated with them?

Is driving an experience?

Is driving an experience or a chore for you?

What's the longest you've driven?

OK, I'm going to quickly pull up the error code I looked up earlier in my car because I do have something wrong with my car, right?

Now, Oh my God.

I know I need to take mine in for an oil change.

Also, the tire light has been on for so long, but I think it just like it just kept turning on every time it during the winter weather.

So like I was like it's probably just the colds and then the cold just made it forever beyond.

So it's just broken right now.

I think that's what I'm going with.

But car things I don't.

I don't know a whole lot about cars.

I'm like car blind.

You know how you can be face blind?

Like if I don't know a car intimately I won't recognize it?

Like, I don't, I don't know cars.

That has four wheels.

It has a a windshield and and doors.

That's a car.

Unless I have, you know, I know somebody who has that specific car.

No, not even if my parents have had that specific car.

I know what it is and that's it.

That's the only way that I know what a car is.

So let's see in order what's my favorite slash dream car DeLorean.

It's not because I think it's a good car because I'm a huge back to the future fan.

Have I ever had questions about my car?

I drive a Nissan Versa and currently it is experiencing a a mass air flow sensor that I got a fix somehow and I was supposed to do today but and I just eat Chinese food and got drunk.

Do I ever get frustrated with my car?

Yes I do.

Is driving an experience or a tour?

For me it's just a vibe dude.

Like sometimes I'll drive my my boyfriend home who lives like an hour away from me by driving and he'd be like I feel so bad and I'm like I get to talk to you for an hour and then like on the way back I like listen to a podcast or something and then an hour flies by.

I don't care.

And then the longest I've ever driven, I have driven, I drove 10 hours in a day once 5/2 and then five back.

We went to when I drove 5 hours down to Delaware and then five hours back just to see a friend of the pod who has not been on the pod, but friend of the pod Emily Garber's like musical that she's making.

I've I've been a delivery driver for Domino's so if you want to know how long I've driven for as long as my shifts have been basically.

Also also, I didn't answer the dream car question but not for any practical reasons.

I want Herbie.

I want a 1960s love bug because I I watched the movies as a small child and by the movies I don't just mean the Lindsay Lohan one because I'm also a giant Herbie nerd.

So fun facts about me.

Hell yeah, brother, all right, and then the e-mail ends with once again, I'm so fucking sorry for how long this e-mail is it just started typing and it just kept going.

We have spent most of this time not even covering the episode.

It's going great.

Can't wait for the next episode.

And then the name you left your says you're the first name is for family work.

The second name is for general use.

The third is for drug dealing, Winky and the secret fourth option of Ruby.

Not influenced by media, I swear.

So thanks James, we we appreciate the long convoluted e-mail.

We, we appreciate when we get mail.

We, we love a post.

We love a good post.

I love that it's called post in all caps.

I finally caught up specifically.

All right, friends, we want to start covering the episode.

We could do that, I guess, if if that's what we're here to do today, I think.

Hey Stevie Universe, we start off the fucking episode.

It feels like the end of an episode because they're just like staring at the all three of the like the the gems are staring at the sunset and there's ukulele music playing, you know, and of end of an episode vibe is and Stephen is just chilling by lion and paradox.

Like, why the fuck did you stop working?

Because we worked for the day.

We did some good stuff.

We're taking a rest.

We're enjoying the view paradox.

Like, excuse me, that view is going to be destroyed if we don't deal with the cluster.

Worry about fucking cluster guys.

But then Stephen's like, listen, it's important to build the drill and stop the cluster, but also it's important to just take a break to feel good.

And then he's like, hey, you know, let's sing a song.

And she's like, fuck is a song?

What's music?

And then we get honestly I completely forgot the song but I love the song so much.

How could you forget about peace and love on the planet Earth?

I remember when this came out, like it was so immediately iconic.

I tried learning how to play this on the ukulele things.

I tried to learn how to play on the ukulele, this song and the theme song.

Wow I think come on Teddy can play this one on ukulele.

I remember them learning it.

My ukulele is like right next to my desk.

This is a good song and it has.

It gives me many good feelings, you know?

Is there anything that's worth more than peace and love on the planet Earth?

Wow, come and sing it with me.

Sing.

The words relate to the key key.

The way she.

Holds up my key.

I've always thought it's so ridiculous.

Like where did she get that from?

The most autistic thing?

If it's a pattern, if it's a pattern, then just repeat after me life and death and love and birth.

Life and death and love and birth and.

Now you sing me for me, with me for me, me for me, Tila and peace and war on the planet Earth.

It's it's a good Harmony line.

It it really is.

But then I like the ending, especially when Paradot sort of just sort of go into like, yeah, no, I guess this is insane that I'm like friends with y'all, but hey, it's working so fuck it, whatever.

Yeah, exactly.

It's, it's so good.

It's it's the character development.

Song actually, it's character development for her and it's also, you know, part of like the main themes of the show, the world.

And also, I don't know, there's Steven universe.

I was thinking about this because we talk a lot about the Earth and how it's like this very special, unique place.

And like how the the sheer beauty of the Earth like has affected like the people who are there, like the the gems who lands there like that.

How there's something special about the Earth, but it's also like Earth is unique and special, but so is everywhere else.

And just because Earth is unique doesn't mean that other places where life exists aren't also unique and worth protecting.

It's just that this is the one that we happen to be at.

And like a colonization is bad besties.

I don't know.

Fascism bad, I don't think.

It's.

I don't think it's, I don't think it's, it hasn't quite happened yet.

It just happened in this last episode that came out where Charlie and I like every episode right now just being like, fashion's bad, Yeah.

It's the new slogan of the podcast Fascism Bad.

We we've gone from Hey guys, Dash Com 2 to hey guys fascism bad.

We we had a a short era of of Rebecca piss.

Always time to bring that back.

There were a lot of there were a lot of bathroom jokes.

Oh my God, in a row.

What are you all doing over?

Here it was not us, it was the episodes itself.

Even peeing outside kept being a joke.

So yeah, it's a good song, guys.

I like this song.

It makes me very happy.

And then we're like, hey, we need to figure out where the fuck we're going to drill because we can't just like, keep going down until we hit cluster.

I feel like we could, Yeah.

Technically no, but you.

Can't.

The cluster is in the mantle.

It's in a specific location.

You can't just drill down from anywhere.

You you might just go right past it.

Like it's not actually.

I mean, it's huge, but it's not that big.

It's not like it's just chilling in the center of the Earth.

Earth they specify it's in the mantle.

Chilling in the sunlight, loving in the moonlight, having a wonderful.

Time I I'm still just picturing it as the same exact thing as the the weird creature that is birthed from Earth in the Eternals movie, which nobody saw but me.

But it's, you know.

I certainly didn't, but I did just watch Jacob Geller's video, a video about digging A digging a hole.

And so now I know just how impressive their drill is.

Did you know that we have never managed to drill even halfway through the the crust of the planet like?

No.

It's it's really fucking hard to get really deep, guys.

That's what she said.

You know, yeah, she did say that.

Wait, OK, well we need to go to guess what the moon is it is it Pearl who says this?

Because OK, this episode I was focusing so hard on Pearl and everything that Pearl does and says because I'm like, if ever there's going to be some foreshadowing, I feel like it it has to be some here because we're getting some more stuff about diamonds and this was such.

An exciting lore drop episode.

Yeah, we're, you know, people like.

Examining the the murals and the moon and stuff.

Yeah, absolutely.

So Pearl, Pearl does say like we have to go to looks up and students like the moon.

What and we get lying to super jump us.

He doesn't want to at first because you know, he taken he could take in a good cat nap.

But when Stevens like there will be no more there will be no more naps if you don't save the world.

So we we get him.

That's enough to get lying back up and running and be like, oh fuck, you're kidding me.

And we do the warpity warp.

And guess what?

The warp is shaped like diamonds, if you didn't already know that.

More, more diamond.

Shit.

So many diamonds all over the place.

And hey, look, we're on the moon and we can only tell that we're on the moon because Steven is a moon boy.

He, he does the gravity thing.

He does the gravity jumping.

He can, he can do that.

Nobody else can because they're made of light.

Yes, they're they are a space faring race that is designed to function perfectly on any given planetoid, which I love.

That's such a good detail.

I gem gem lore gem biology the best.

Yeah, also we get, I think everybody except maybe Amethyst does the gem flashlight thing.

I, I feel like we've only seen Pearl do that before this episode.

So again, more power things I'm I'm noticing because even Garnet does it with their hands.

Paradox doing it with her jam so.

Oh, I also wanted to mention that Lion is such a sweet little guy.

I love him.

He's so sleepy.

It was so hard for him to get them up to the moon and I support him in all of his naps.

You know, that's pretty Dang far for him to go so.

It's interesting.

I'm sorry he had to do like multiple like rings for them to go really fast.

It's interesting because Lion's warping is very clearly different from the Gems warping technology.

You know, he's not going through those same beans of light that they do.

And I'm trying to remember like this distance effects, you know, their warping capabilities because you know, you can have a warp from from Earth to home world and that doesn't appear to like affect how long it takes or anything.

Whereas this.

Might affect how long it takes and that's.

What I was trying to remember if it does we haven't we?

Haven't done that yet.

I think the only time we really see warping between home world and earth happens like in future because we don't have a a working warp until then.

So yeah, but this is where we get the murals, guys.

First we see Blue and guys, this is the first time we've seen Blue without her big her shawl because we just got that in the answer.

And I was like, I wish we saw more of her in the shawl.

It makes me so sad.

We see it like twice and then it's gone forever.

But this is her with her hair.

They don't have the fully realized designs of the diamonds just yet because like this doesn't have Blues little hair, almost beard like the way that it like kind of like goes down and it connects in that weird way.

But she looked pretty.

She's cool.

And then paradise, like, wait, wait, are they all here?

Yes, here is my diamonds, the most perfect of them all, yellow diamonds.

It's the space giraffe.

It's her.

She's here, she's she's got the, the funky not hair as I've heard.

It's a, it's actually a helmet.

So I want to know what her hair looks like.

I really want to know guys.

It looks like something.

It sure does.

I don't know, but hers is the the like the only one that I think is the same exactly compared to the other ones.

But, yeah, this is where we finally get, hey, the diamonds there are overlords.

They're the most perfect beings.

They created everything.

We are made to serve them.

Didn't you know that, Steven, The fact that he's like, oh, yeah, they seem to be a big deal.

Are they a big deal?

Steven.

Steven.

Diamond Universe.

Boy howdy, they sure are a big deal.

Not the full legal name.

Well, no, Charlie, you know it's but we haven't in a while.

You need to say the whole the whole Stevens name.

Oh God, wait, do I have it?

Steven Courts Cutie pie Diamond Demeo universe.

Yes, dude.

Thank you.

I don't, I don't remember like what the order is, but it's like you put every single fucking name that they've ever called him all together.

And also cutie pie.

I I love him.

What a little guy.

Well, that's be, you know that he like he says that once, right?

Like that's why that's in there.

Yeah, I know.

My middle name is Arnett, says it.

Your middle name is Cutie Pie.

Yes, correct.

OK, good.

It's his name.

It it sure is it.

Sure is, I hope he legally changed it to that like I.

Really.

I can tell that is his legal.

I don't know if Steven has a legal name.

Does Steven have papers?

Is he a citizen?

We've this is always been a question I love bringing up whether or not he is actually a citizen or technically still illegal.

He is an alien.

I mean, he's half alien.

He was.

Born here.

So he's a citizen by the fact that he's born here.

Yeah, he is naturalized, that's true.

Amethyst would also be a citizen, so.

Good for.

Her everyone else, not exactly her Pearl has mentioned this.

She doesn't exactly have a driver.

She.

Is not a citizen.

Even though she's lived here for like almost 6000 years, so you know.

Whatever man, don't.

Worry about it, OK.

Where were we?

They find the stairs and they upset Lion by bringing the stairs.

You know, make them floaty and everything.

Truly a crime.

Horrible.

Why would you do this to my boy?

I love how Paradot is just like, Oh my God, we're walking in the steps, the diamonds Stevens.

Like, they sure liked stairs.

Yeah, I love how Steven is consistently just being like, damn, it's really weird that you're like celebrating fascism paradox.

Also, little little white diamond in the background as they're walking up the stairs.

There is a room that we go to that is not important right now.

We'll we'll deal with that another time.

Is that is that the fucking room where they can see like the the stuff on the planets?

It absolutely is.

Yes, it is.

That's what the circle in the center is.

It's the circle that you touching.

You can see whatever.

And this was where I noticed the Pearl foreshadowing because she is like not making eye contact.

Like as she's walking up she is like not looking at anything in here.

It's because she knows.

She knows.

There are there are like so many moments where I was just like, what's Pearl doing in this park?

What is where?

Where is she paradise?

Loving everything about how cool this place is, even though it's it's really old tech, you know, like whatever, it's not, it's not that cool.

Actually.

Steven just straight up sits.

The throne is like, whatever, I wouldn't touch shit.

I mean, that's what they're here to do.

Nobody rules over Earth anymore, so why not there?

Are no rules.

Could anyone have pressed those those buttons and activated it or is it just him?

That is a question that I have, yeah.

Narratively, it makes sense why it's just him, because you know.

Right.

Peridot says that the chair is for elites.

She doesn't specifically say only diamonds.

The chair is smaller than it would be for a diamond specifically, but that's because this is Pink's colony.

Presumably.

You know if it's Pinks chair then that makes sense.

I could see it either way.

Because we definitely see Pink sitting in this exact chair later on.

And that's the exact same hand thing that we've seen in like, you know, Roses Armory and the kindergarten and everything.

So I'm like.

And Steven pretty much always activates those as far as I can remember, you know?

Yeah, well, he has the highest authority, so there you go.

And I'm just loving how every time we go over between Peridot and Steven having this conversation, we can see like midway up down from on Pearl, we do not see Pearl's face, but we see Pearl is right behind Peridot.

And I'm just like, what's Pearl thinking right now?

What's her facial expression?

Huh.

Is there a reason we're seeing this?

I'm probably reading too much into it, but I'm also just like.

Pearl, it's totally a thing because that's also her position.

Like she's got to be having like a flashback right now.

Like that's where she stood.

Exactly.

That was her place.

Steven takes the little doohickey out of the chair.

And paranoids like don't touch that.

It's not important right now.

We're not dealing with this.

Let's look through the files.

Hey, yo.

God, we're looking through the diamonds porn.

I want to know what else is on here.

I do.

I use you joke about porn, but I'm just like, do Pink and Pearl have cute little pictures of themselves on here?

Because I feel like that absolutely would have happened.

Charlie No.

It's it's interesting.

I'm not saying sexual, I'm saying like.

I'm saying like selfies, like I'm saying like for them to be cute.

Like, no, they're not.

They're not cutesy besties.

They're just fascist dictators.

Right.

Like also gay.

I'm thinking about like, you know, we, we established earlier in this episode that like gems don't have a concept of leisure.

You know, I'm, I'm pretty sure that everything on here is pretty utilitarian.

And yet my brain is going back to it's a blue Pearl that does like the little drawings during the court proceedings and shit.

Like that's the kind of thing that I'm thinking of like, you know, like, hey, you just do a cute little doodle.

It ends up in like the files for some reason because like, you know, everything ends up in the cloud.

I'm just like, what if they did like a cute little goof off and they were like, we're going to look at all the places on earth.

Hey, I'm doing a lot of peace signs right now.

Is not great for audio, but like that's what my brains going to where they're like, Hey look, I'm over here on Earth.

And they're being silly.

You're right that Pink would have.

Pearl, at the time would not have.

But you know, you know what I mean.

Like she's dragging Pearl into it.

And that's how Pearl is falling in love with her slowly.

So, you know, anyway, this is this is our first real picture of the Earth.

Russia does not exist.

Oh dear.

I can't believe Russia's dead.

Did you not know about this Ray?

Did you?

Did you not know about this from the fandom?

I, I, I knew that something was fucked up.

I knew that at least something was missing, but I, I didn't remember that specifically.

Russia was not.

There, that's my favorite meme from the fandom, where it's just like, oh, Russia, you want to censor us, you're gone.

There's a giant hole in Russia.

It's kind of reminded me a little bit of those memes of like The Hunger Games, and it's like, hey, or like the other countries are like, hey, what do you think America's doing, America?

Yeah, games right there.

That's what's happening.

Apparently the cluster was inserted in California.

Good to know that's the insertion point which they need to stop saying in the show.

But it's very important to locate the insertion point.

Yep.

Guys, insertion is not an inherently sexual word.

It's a perfectly fine normal word for my children's cartoon.

Yeah, let me insert my cluster into your earth.

Through the insertion hole.

I can't not.

I'm so glad children don't listen to this fucking podcast.

They definitely do because I've seen the analytics.

This is supposed to be a fucking explicit rated podcast.

Like if your kids are listening to this, that's on you at this point.

Parents, I can't stop.

I cannot prevent.

It's rated explicit, I'm just saying I've seen the analytics.

Crazy.

Some.

Sometimes people are just little, little.

Weirdos kids could be doing worse shit on the Internet.

And now Peridot shows us how perfect Earth could have been because she's just like, going ham on all of this.

She's like, oh, let's look at all the little places that were originally here made for gems.

We see like every place that we've ever gone to in season 1, like moons.

Lunar Ceasefire is definitely on here.

That RIP Lunar Ceasefire.

RIP RIP Crystal.

Trump's two.

I was gonna say RIP to the crystal jumps.

They're a real 1.

Poor went out for the boys.

And then paradox like this is what the Earth could have been.

See, it's beautiful.

It's a finished Earth colony.

I can't believe you guys wasted this.

So many gems would have been made.

It's useful the way that you know it's projected as being as it currently is.

It is not useful.

Like Paradox Worldview is entirely utilitarian.

She's learning otherwise, but she's not there yet.

I hate the word useful just so often.

It's just one of those things, you know?

It's like you can't just exist.

You can't just be happy where you are.

You have to always be doing something.

It's the capitalist mindset, right?

Y'all fucking hate it.

I hate it here.

Can we move to this earth?

Maybe they don't have those things.

I want to live under Marinana Foie RIP even though she hasn't been elected yet, but don't worry about it.

Yeah, so all of all of the Crystal Gems are like mad about this shit.

Yeah.

So fucking mad.

It is an understandable emotional reaction.

Peridot is parroting exactly the rhetoric that they were fighting against, like and so they have this immediate defensive reaction.

It makes a ton of sense that that happens to them.

They are also seeing something that is very upsetting and shocking to them that Peridot is treating as normal because Peridot doesn't have this immediate emotional reaction to seeing a all but destroyed Earth with no life left on it, whereas all of them do.

I just it's, it's, it's a super interesting scene because Garna even says like she lifts up Paradotte by the front of her little shirt and she's like, you are talking about things that you don't understand.

And the truth is that she doesn't understand what she's talking about.

You know, she, she is starting to get it, but you know, changing your entire like worldview is not an easy thing to do.

And so the way that they react to the situation is understandable, but it's also not helpful in the current moment.

And Steven is the only one who really recognizes that.

Yeah, he's, he's trying to do the Bard thing.

He's like, hey, let's sing the song, guys.

Remember the song we just said?

But also, but also the other important the the important Pearl thing happening in this moment when they're seeing what the Earth like would have looked like the finished colony.

I don't know if this is the first time it's happened, but we get Pearl covering her mouth.

We get the thing, we get the thing.

I noticed it and I was like y'all, y'all, it's happening.

Pearl wants to say a thing but she cannot.

I wonder why?

Pearl wants to say fuck, except she can't.

And she, she oh God, I don't know, fuck.

Maybe that's also one of the things that Rose was like, yeah, hey, you can't say fuck either.

God.

Yeah, maybe.

Who knows?

You know, we Steven at least makes sure Garnett does not punch Paradot's face in.

And Stevens just he's, he's upset with Peridot.

He is, yeah.

You know he's.

Just like that again.

Understandably so, right?

I thought what we had was special.

It's it's the parent saying I'm I'm not mad, I'm just disappointed.

The thing is that Peridot is making a lot of progress, but progress is not linear.

Steven wants progress to be linear.

He wants it to make sense, and it's just not going to.

Peridot is going to have backslides because like, she is starting to see that the earth is valuable, but she hasn't actually challenged her like internal assumptions about what actually does have value.

Yeah, you know what has value?

Their friendship.

So she should make sure that stays.

So we we love that friendship.

But as the episode is ending, Paradox grabs that little, little doohickey that was in the chair that she told Steven not to touch, and Steven sees it and it's very dramatic moments.

I kind of forgot that this episode in the next episode were two different episodes.

Like this is such a cliffhanger and then you've got to wait and then and then the next episode you're going to be thinking about it the whole time.

Very exciting.

We're all have.

Forgotten at this point, like that point when we when we get to record that, who knows?

It will be like all right.

It was kind of funny to just see how abruptly the episode ended because I'm like, oh, I know what happens next.

Like the the whole like they talk to Yellow Diamond.

She calls him, she calls her a Claude.

Wait a minute.

Why'd the episode end?

No, right.

That's supposed to happen next.

Why'd the episode end?

That's that's how I felt.

Separate certain episodes really work best as a Steven Baum OK.

Hell yeah, brother.

True.

Speaking of Steven Bombs, should we talk about some some trivia?

Maybe go to the Crystal Temple, Robert.

And the Crystal Temple trivia section.

Let's go.

The global map of Earth observed in the Moon base doesn't quite match our real life, including a conspicuously large crater slash indentation in the coastline in Siberia, the African continent being smaller, Australia being nearly split in two, and the Horn of South America being larger.

Sugar has previously mentioned that the Earth scene in the cartoon has a slightly alternate timeline from real life to greater and lesser degrees due to the presence of the gems affecting history.

Parallel flips through the diagrams of completed structures.

The following structures are seen in order.

The Lunar Ceasefire, the Ancient Sky Arena, the Sea Shrine, the Sky Spire, the Communication Hub, A tower surrounded by mountains.

Possibly the moon base seen in this episode.

A structure resembling and Mesopotamian iggurat or Mesoamerican step pyramid.

Possibly the pyramid in the desert seen in Stevens line and the Galaxy warp.

You know that that that pyramid that just went kaboom.

Yes, that's that's definitely the one that we're talking about.

The design for the completed Earth colony, a sphere with craters and spikes, resembles the structure of some viral capsids and viral envelopes.

That's interesting, yeah.

The facial hair Steven grew in the previous episode seems to have disappeared in this episode.

This may indicate that he started shaving before this episode occurred.

Is also possible that the hair is just too small to be visible or was omitted as a result of an animation error.

I can't believe our boy is old enough to shave.

He is 14, so.

Yeah, that is about when I started to grow facial hair enough to a point that I need to shave, and that's for cultural references, Steven sings the Doremi Faso Latino.

So flage method used in teaching music and pitch.

Steven sings a song on the moon to the tune of the Fountain in the park, similar to how Eugene Cernan and Harrison Schmidt did so during an Eva on Apollo 17 in 1972.

That's cute.

Now for my favorite segments continuity, the drill that is being built since back to the barn is finished.

The Great Diamond Authority, first mentioned by Ronaldo and Cape Beit Shitty weird is confirmed to be the ruling group of the Gem race.

Tharis is also to be hollowed out.

Another piece of information that Ronaldo is correct about.

I I hated this when this part of the episode came out.

I verbatim out loud say I fucking hate that Ronaldo was right.

They want to hollow about the earth.

It's my favorite shit, it's so funny.

I hate, I hate that he was right.

Oh man, just say Ronaldo Boilers on the Steven Universe wiki.

Gasp, gas.

Talk about all the time, man.

Rose Quartz identity as Pink Diamond was hinted in the episode when Steven was able to activate the chair situated in the moon base.

We were just talking about this, which as Peridot stated, was the chair where only the Diamonds can sit on.

I didn't like the way that that was phrased, further hinting Stevens heritage as a Diamond.

This was also indirectly hinted during the scene where the Diamonds climb up the stairs of the moon base, where Peridot states that they were literally walking in the footsteps of the Diamonds with Steven leading the way.

Cute.

Yeah, that's hilarious.

It's so, it's so good.

It's so important.

It's interesting I this show does place Steven as like a very natural leadership figure and like acknowledges that he is special because he is a diamond, which kind of bothers me because it's like a little eugenics Y like, but the show is like interesting about that.

Like I'm thinking about the episode in future where Steven is trying to give everyone like different jobs that don't have to do with the things that they were made for.

But they're like, I'm actually happier doing the thing that I was made for because it's easier for me and is more pleasant.

And he's like, what?

No, then we're just like the diamonds.

And yeah, it's the gem society.

Fucking weird.

It's hard to actually map onto our human society because they actually are made for specific purposes.

All right my friends, so I guess it is time to start awarding Pearl points.

Who are giving our Pearl points to this episode?

We didn't have a whole lot of little guys in this episode besides Paradon and Steven.

Mine goes to Lion.

He did so good.

Did.

Lions the real one this episode.

I'm gonna give it to.

I'm struggling.

I'm also struggling.

I'm gonna give it to.

You know, I'm just gonna give, I'm gonna give it to Steven for just trying to keep the peace.

Be a Bard, you know?

And we've said multiple times that like, oh, hey, this is going to be the section of Paradot gets a bill of jillion points.

So you know what?

I'm just going to give it to Paradot.

You know, you know who's going to get it next episode and I think.

Oh.

I think we know it's going to be Paradot.

Paradot deserves all the points.

I can almost guarantee that Max Vote is not going to go to Yellow Diamond.

It's going to go to Patti Lupone.

That's amazing.

Yeah.

All right.

And then the question, what the Hell's the question?

Fuck.

Why are you green?

What what do what do we do with this episode that that has a question I was trying to write down the probably it's not like I can ask have you ever been to the moon?

So.

We were talking about driving earlier, maybe like what's the furthest distance you've ever travelled?

The furthest distance I've ever travelled.

Does any form of transportation count?

Because the furthest form by driving was probably to Delaware, but then the farthest form on plane.

I've been to South America a few times.

Cool.

Hell yeah, brother.

I've been to Greece.

You can blame Uncle Rick for that one.

I would love to go.

Which is a wild thing.

On a on a Percy Jackson inspired like Quest to Greece.

I I think that needs to be a thing at some point, right?

The damn meme page in front of the Parthenon True look.

The way things are going, I don't know what I'm going to do in the future, but like I'm currently, I currently right now at the time of recording this, have like 3 flights line up right, Two flights technically in the flight back to Denver, Co and to Santa Monica Pier so that I can record for my video essay.

Now, if you're going to ask me where the fuck is Los Angeles, I'll, I'll tell you.

You won't catch me dead in Los Angeles.

I'm sorry.

In Las Vegas in.

Los Angeles.

Yeah, you won't catch me fucking dead in Vegas, La Mao.

What?

Want to go gambling, right?

Let's go.

Gambling.

Ah man, I can't stop winning.

Don't you want to go find Lin Manuel Miranda in a casino?

I have a better chance to find Lin Lin Manuel Miranda if I'm walking down the streets of Manhattan.

That's very true.

It's absolutely valid, right?

Did you say where do you traveled?

Oh no I didn't.

The furthest I've ever driven myself was from Ohio to South Dakota with my little sister Co Co driving.

Good times.

The furthest I've ever been was the time that I spent a month in Armenia.

OH.

Damn the Raylor.

Yeah, my little sister was studying languages and I just, I just tagged along.

We were in Yerevan.

Why not?

I went to.

Some museums kind of slapped ye.

Ye, ye, sometimes you just go.

Places.

Go places and do things.

All right, folks, that's in of another one of an episode of the bits if you want to find Ray.

I mean, we already made the jokes, but like Ray, where, where can they find you on the Internet?

Yeah, you please come listen to of the eldest gods.

We we love to talk about mythology and it's being translated into middle grade books.

Good, good times.

Like, that's mostly Egyptian shit, but you know, you know.

I can't wait, can't wait till y'all get to North mythology stuff.

That's going to be great.

That's going to be in like 10 years.

You got to get.

Your whole years get through all heroes, you got to get through all canes.

For some reason you guys are covering canes 1 chapter at a time even though there's two there's 2 chapter Povs We.

Will do 2 chapter Povs in Heroes.

Okay, okay, I made that executive decision.

Don't you worry about that.

Also, if you ever if if y'all are a bits listener and you ever want to come chat with Ray, we're in the same Discord because we're on the same network.

Hey yo, even $1.00 all you got to do is like pay us $1.00 on Patreon and you can join the Deus Ex Media Discord server.

So you should pay us $50,000.

Yeah, that way we can go to the moon.

Well, yeah, Charlie, it costs way more.

Charlie, it costs way more than that to go to the moon.

I appreciate your enthusiasm, but we need we need more money if we want to go to the moon.

No $50,000 And then we can get a lion and then we can go to the moon, right?

That's all it takes.

You get a lion, you tie it pink, you go to the moon.

Well, you know what?

Before the podcast gets even more deranged and crazy.

And every podcasts were perfect.

We wouldn't have the bits.

Bye.

The bits, the bits.

OK, bye.

You can follow this podcast socials at the Bits SU Pod on Instagram and Tumblr.

You can send a message to our diamondlinethroughthebitssupod@gmail.com.

If you'd like to support us financially, join us at our patreonpatreon.com/the Bits SU.

By becoming a Patron, you can join the Deus Ex Media Discord server, where you'll be able to chat with us and other listeners about Steven Universe or whatever else.

Our $5 Patrons here also gets you access to Stevens Room, our monthly bonus show.

There we'll be talking about a wide variety of topics, which usually has something to do with Steven in some way.

No promises.

You can check out our merch store, The Bits SU on Red Bubble to find custom designs made by yours truly.

Or if you cannot or do not want to support us financially, we'd really appreciate a rating, a review, or even letting your friends and followers know how much you love the podcast.

It really helps.

Our music was written and produced by Jason Hilton.

You can find him at Negative Selections on Instagram.

You can follow me, Charlie at Green Pixie 12 on most platforms.

I also have an art Instagram at Green Pixie Draws.

You can find me Robert at the Damn Mean page on Instagram, Twitter, TikTok and Blue Sky.

If you want to have more from me, check out my YouTube channel also called The Damn Mean Page, where I make videos mainly about Percy Jackson but also sometimes other fun stuff.

The Bits is proud to be a part of Deus Ex Media, which features great podcasts like Of The Eldest Gods, a chapter by chapter Rick Riot and Pod with mythological context and no spoilers.

Well, we finished the Percy Jackson series.

Wait, what are we still doing here?

And what is that music?

Oh, you, you thought it was over bro, we're just getting started.

We, we are Charlie.

What's next for the oldest gods?

Well, Ray, it's time for us to go into our Egyptian era.

We're going to start the Kane Chronicles.

Oh hell yeah.

Wait, why do you have a glowing boomerang?

Don't worry about it, it's just my Egyptian magic wand.

And then the Egyptian stuff isn't going to be like the Greek stuff, is it?

Not at all, but we'll still cover mythology as it comes up in each chapter.

Are we going to have cabins this season?

Nah, the Kings don't have cabins.

So instead I'm Charlie following the path of Bast.

And I'm Ray following the path of GEB.

Join us as we read The Red Pyramid, the first book of The Kane Chronicles, chapter by chapter.

Welcome back to Of the Eldest Gods.

The.

Basically goth.

That's me.

What the hell?

How are you bait?

How is 1 basically goth?

Well the only makeup that I sometimes wear is eyeliner, black eyeliner, and the only nail Polish I ever use is black nail Polish, so I think I feel like that qualifies me as goth.

We bought we bought makeup like 3 weeks ago.

So I'm like, hey Mac, I want you to do my makeup.

I feel confident and then I instantly checking out the second like the makeup was in our hands, like the makeup's here.

And I think if I have some more of this wine, I might get comfortable to be like, ah, do my makeup, fuck it, who cares.

Getting drunk and recording cosplay tik toks is one of my favorite activities and I mean I've done that like twice, but the the lack of inhibitions really does help in that sort of thing.

God forbid you feel the rain on your skin and release your inhibitions.

Dave X Media.