You're listening to a Mother and Mere podcast.

Sorry, I'm late.

Am I glowing?

Yes you are?

What's happening?

Okay, you're very jewy.

I just had on your recommendation, Stacey.

I booked into Mecca for a makeup lesson.

It's new year, It's a new me looks great.

It was the biggest learning.

I've been doing my contour or wrong.

But I bought a white pencil to put under my eye.

Wait.

Why have you been doing contour wrong?

Oh?

I've been doing it too low.

It's been dragging my face down.

You've got to put it up really high, like almost into your eye socket.

Remember that Erica Taylor, who I told you about on YouTube, who teaches women over forty to do makeup.

She says that your blush needs to go even higher than you think, which.

I already thought it was pretty hard.

It's basically on your under eye.

Yeah.

And then I bought a white pencil to do underneath my eye, which just sounds so gross.

You gotta like pop your eye out and.

Put then Is that it?

Yeah?

And I thought I was like, won't that make my eyeball look yellow?

No?

It does.

And I don't know what magic it is.

It's just like bo, it looks good.

What do you know?

What?

Else?

When I was walking and I was like, I bet I get some eighteen year old with like plump jewish skin.

No, No, I got this woman Mary, who's a retired makeup artist and she was sixty eight.

Mary, I'm sure she also has lovely skin.

Yeah, she had amazing skin.

But I was so relieved to have someone that understands, you know, when your skin starts to age.

Can I ask one more question?

Why did she say about bass because I'm really struggling with that, as most skin gets dryer.

Base.

Yeah, that's a technical term for foundation moms.

She said to me that the foundation doesn't it's not going to fix all your problems.

You need to have a skin care.

Oh so that's more when people say that, Yeah, too much effort.

All right, okay, distracted.

Welcome to Parenting out Loud, the podcast of parents who don't always listen to parenting podcasts.

We bring you the news, the trends, and the culture and what parents.

Are thinking about, including Mecca, you can make up aging.

I'm Monique Bowley, I'm Amelia.

Lester, and I am Stacy here and I'm so glad that Reco worked out for you on Thank.

You Boy, you are the Oracle.

I say this every week, right, what's on today's show?

Well, today I'm going to tell you about a thing called the click test, and I need to warn you that it's first going to horrify you, but then it's going to change how your parent for the better forever.

I guarantee it.

Wow, big claim.

And there's a new group we have to monitor for screen time.

And it's not who you.

Think, guys.

I had a fight with a man in a park and I need to know.

Am I the asshole?

We will tell you.

I can't wait.

We're going to be the jury.

But first, what's been on around online this week?

You know, like when you really like use like a word like a lot and it drives everyone like mad.

Have you figured out which word I'm talking about now?

Well, the youths have a new word that they use instead of like, so their version, because of course they do, they had to rebrand like and have their own it's weight.

It just came to the conclusion that the new lake is week, you know, like weet like week, because it's like it's a you know, I can't even begin as tunance without saying.

Okay, wait, I have real problems with this.

Wait wait, wait, wait?

Why young people always think they're inventing things.

We've been saying weight for decades, since prime Warter all times, weight has been a word we have used, am I wrong ones?

But not in a way that they do, not in this sort of overused way.

It's not special, it's not unique.

They use it as a filler.

It's just their version of saying, or tell me something else you've seen this week because that's annoying.

Okay, let me tell you something else slightly less annoying that I've seen.

This was really interesting.

Obviously, there's a lot of panic around screen time with kids.

We know this.

We've talked about this at no cause that we're all thinking about screen time and whether it's too much, But has anyone checked on our parents?

So there was this report in The Economist where they spoke about how elderly people are now spending half their waking hours on a screen because of course they were like the TV generation, but now they finally caught up and adopted smartphones and iPads and they're obsessed with them, so they've become like the new version of our toddlers where we can't get them off, and they'll send you videos that existed at like the start of the Internet, but they've just seen it for the first time and now they'll send it to you as a link.

Should we be worried about them?

This feels anecdotally correct.

I feel like I see boomers on phones in inappropriate situations, maybe more than any other age group.

Yeah, they love Facebook, they love Marketplace, They've caught up to us.

They love the candy crush.

I don't reckon this is necessarily a bad thing.

I read something in the Guardian about how when you're using screen in an active way, like on a phone, so you're communicating, you're bargaining on Facebook, MicroPlace, you're playing wordle, the rates of cognitive decline completely plummet.

Like it's quite good for their brains as opposed to watching Antiques road show for five hours.

Like screen time is not all equal, and if you're doing active things on screen time, like a lot of boomers do, that's not necessarily a bad things.

Yeah, And I guess their brain is fully developed as well, so they're not as susceptible to kind of the brain rock content like little kids can be.

But then the downside of that is if they're sitting there for half, they're waking hours on a screen, like movement is probably at risk as well.

You know, like we try to say to kids, get off your screen and get outside.

They're not moving.

Are you trying to parent your parents?

Cloth for me?

Let them have their wordle and their candy crush.

Have you called your parents, Amelia and told them not to fall for scams?

No?

Should?

I?

Oh, probably need to.

Yeah, you know, we talk about digital literacy for kids, but it is so important for.

Our parents as well.

I had to ring my parents and give them the heads up on a few scams that were going around where I was just like, oh, my parents are sitting ducks.

They will fall for this in a half a second.

And the stats are crazy, like two hundred and sixty million dollars just this year have been scammed out of people in this country.

So and it's always investment scams, fishing scams, romance scams, and they're sophisticated and they just go after these older people who don't have the digital literacy skills that we do.

Okay, well, what's boring?

Is this so boring?

That's on the to do list.

I wrote about something recently in an article in the Free Press called The Secrets to Parenting is to do less.

So obviously I clicked on this headline being a type B and it has a very practical way to do less as a parent, because, as we've talked about on the show, doing too much as a parent can be bad for you and bad for your kids.

Here's how you do less.

Okay, please tell me, I'm taking notes.

Get a clicker.

Do you know what a clicker is like?

When you to go in and out of clubs and they'd be like clickick once aain moms.

They thought you might be familiar with them from sport because I know you're very sporty.

Yeah, I've seen them.

Yep.

You can get them from office works.

Yeah, they're like ten bucks.

Get a clicker and click it every time over the course of thirty minutes that you issue a command to your children, every single time, So whether it's put your shoes back on the shoe rack, put your clothes in the laundry basket, go and have a bath, come to the dinner table, just click it every time.

That's TV TENN the TV off, turn the TV off ten, the TV off ten, the TV off?

Yes, every time, even if it's a repeated command.

Researchers have done this.

They have given parents the clickers and watched them, and what they've discovered is that millennial parents are issuing too many commands.

How many commands you might ask?

They had parents issuing up to one hundred commands in thirty minutes.

Oh my god, but Amelia, that's because they don't listen.

We're saying the same thing over and over again.

Do you get double clicks for how long?

How do you say it?

Because I would get like when I start to scream, do you get five clicks?

That counterpart, I've got some bad news.

They also counted how many of these commands the kids actually listen, and the average was about one third.

So if you o show one hundred commands, I don't know.

I'm not very good at mass I think that means about thirty.

A listen to.

So if you're lucky, maybe the clothes get put in the laundry basket and the TV gets turned off if you're lucky.

So the click test, I'm going to tell you why that's revolutionary in a second.

But first of all, I want to know whether you'd actually do that.

Yeah, I want to go to office works and get a click guest straight away because I think I'm going to be in the hundreds.

But when you sent me this article, I loved it.

I drank it up like I was a camel in the desert who had not had a drink of water in four hundred days.

I drank it like I was a child that went to school without their own drink bottle and doesn't know how to work a bubbler.

Like I was so into it.

And what this article says it sets the scene with like forty one percent of parents are so stressed that they can't function right.

Why this is so revolutionary is because the way that we parent as millennials has been labeled as intensive.

And it's not our fault.

There's like all these things shifting in society and culture that make us parent in an intensive way.

But what this article says is that there are three modern fallacies when it comes to parenting.

The first one is more is more like the more the parent does, the better the outcome, and that is not true.

All the research says that is not true at all.

The second fallacy is like protect your kids.

You've got to shield them from discomfort and shield them from distress.

That is not necessarily good outcomes either.

And the third part of this intensive parenting is that every misbehavior you see in your kids has a deep meaning.

So we say, oh, I can see that you're feeling angry right now, how can we help solve this problem?

Like it is so intense to parent in this way?

And yeah, the whole premise of this thing is like stop, just stop.

Less commands, less supervision, just natural consequences.

And I felt like I had been slapped across the face.

It's so hard, though, to think of that in theory, because you're like, well, if I don't tell them to not have their feet on the wall, or I don't tell them to say thank you ten times until they do it, then am I raising a rubbish kid, like a kid that's going to be a bad member of society?

I think that's the thing we're all stressed about, right, So how do you actually pull back and do less?

So the article suggests that in situations like that scenario where you said you got to say thank you to the nice person.

The article says that you need to let the world do your parenting for.

You, okay, And this is a scary concept.

It is a scary concept.

What do you mean?

What does it mean by that?

It means let the physical world teach your children how to behave So a very simple example from my own life is I will always remember that shortly after having my first child, you know, a toddler was running around.

I didn't know what to do with them.

And we went over to a friend's place.

And this friend had had her first child at twenty and then had three subsequent children.

Suffice to say, she was a much more experienced parent than I was or my partner was.

And the kids were playing with a candle on the coffee table as the adults were sitting around drinking wine and crying about their lives.

And my kid was putting his finger like on top of the flame sort of, and my partner and I kept saying stop doing that, and he would keep doing it, and then clicked.

My kids didn't tell her child to stop doing it, And we said, shouldn't you tell your child to stop doing that?

She's like, no, he'll learn.

If he burns his finger, he will learn.

That is what this article means.

You have to let the world do your parenting for you.

But that's why it's scary because it means consequences and it's.

Relinquish of control, isn't it.

Like I have a theory that I feel like gentle parenting or what we were sold as gentle parenting, has a lot to answer for because I think a big part of that was that we were told, you know, it's all about connection, like you've got to you've got to be in their world and down on their level and create that connection with them.

But we've mistaken the connection for like correction because we're so up in their grill.

I feel like then once we're there, we feel like we have to be constantly steering them and correcting them and doing all the right things.

And as you say, it's just it's not going in any way.

So what is the point.

We just do need to step back.

There was a podcast episode a while back with Dak Shepherd and he was talking about how with their two daughters, they're raising them almost to be intentionally disrespectful.

This is his daughters with Kristen Bell.

With Kristen Bell.

Yeah, so they've got two daughters, they're twelve and ten, and they allow them to talk back, They allow them to have opinions with them and with other people.

And I guess this is what we're saying of well, let society do it.

Like, if they're going to talk back, then you know they'll see the consequence of that if people don't like what they're saying, or they'll advocate for themselves, and then that's a good thing.

That feels very radical to me.

But then who are we teaching our kids to be polite?

For?

Yes, to show that we are good parents.

Yeah, that's the thing.

A lot of that I really do think is driven by the reflection on us, isn't it.

Like when you think about it, it's because you want them to be out in publican people go, oh, you've done such a good job, Like they are so well mattered, they are so well behavior.

Right, it's totally about us, not them.

Like when my kids open get given a birthday present, I'm always like card first, card first, card first, click, click click click.

That is because I want people to think, oh, they've been raised right, you know they know that it's card first.

And she's such a good point.

Completely, it's centering us.

Have you taught them to pretend they don't see the cash fall out when they open it as well.

From like their grandparents.

We're not there yet.

Can I tell you about my friend Connie, because I think there's a middle ground here.

We don't necessarily have to have your kids burning themselves on candles.

But she does this with her kids.

And she was like us.

Intense parenting, snowplow parenting, doing all the things for everyone.

But one day she.

Just snapped, right, kids weren't listening.

She was stressed, and she snapped, and she thought, I'm going to parent like my mum did.

So she calls it the Rosy Blafary method, and she sat them down and informed them of their responsibilities and said, all right, now it's over to you now.

I didn't know any of this until she came to my house one day for a catch up and she didn't bring any drink bottles for her kids.

I'm thirsty.

They said, too bad.

She said too bad, that's all she said.

She didn't say, oh honey, I'll get your drink.

She said too bad.

And do you know what the kids did.

They went and got a cap out of the carpet and got themselves a drink, and then they get in the car to go home and it's late at night, and I say, oh, do you want to take some yogurts with you or some snacks?

She's like, no, too bad, they can just eat when they get home.

My jaw was on the floor.

I was like, I want to be this.

I think this is the way.

And her kids, Yeah, if they don't take a jacket when it's cold outside, she lets them get cold.

I love that.

I feel like my children are so much better hydrated than I was.

I spend a lot of time washing water bottle.

We didn't I don't think I owned a water bottle until yeah, twenty years old.

Yeah, so I love that.

Mind.

What's the parenting method again?

What's it called?

The Rosie Bla Faring method?

The method?

Yeah, the Italian Mama method.

So this article, it posits an independence activity that you can try with your kids, and it says what you should do is pull out a calendar and say to your kids, sit them down and say to them what would you like to do on your own that you don't already do?

And then when they tell you, you write those things in every day right in the square what they want to do on their own that they don't already do, and it's called independent activities.

All the research says that they reduce anxiety and they build resilience.

So it might be something like I want to go to the shops and buy a milk.

I want to ride my bike to school by myself.

I want to cook some muffins.

But the rules of these activities are there can be no parent helping and there can be no parent even present while they do it.

This sounds like that show you recommended ages ago mons of the children in Japan where they send them off to yeah to do like the mini tasks on their own, and just how capable they actually are when you're not there interfering.

The flaw in this argument is if I sat my children down, legit and said what would you like to do on your own?

They'd say watch TV?

Watch TV.

That would be their answer for every day winecraft.

Yeah.

Does the article address the fact that kids just want to watch screens like I.

I wish that they said bake muffins, But it's not going to be that.

It's nice going to I think that's part of why we do have to cut ourselves some slack, because look, every generation has this kind of stereotype that people use to put them down and in terms of how their parents.

So for baby boomers, it was the latch key generation that's sort of benign neglect.

For Gen X, it was the idea of helicopter parenting, and for millennials it's intensive parenting.

And maybe we practice intensive parenting because there's a lot to be intense about these days.

Yeah, can I tell you something.

I'm trying this summer to try and be relaxed.

After reading this article, I'm calling it the summer shrug.

Okay, how do we do a summer shrug?

The whole vibe of it is you go, eh, it's summer.

So if my kids are in water during the day, like if they run under a sprinkler or they go for a swim, I'm like, no bath tonight because it's like it's summer.

That's gene.

They want like zooper dupers all day.

I'm like, that's hydration summer.

It feels like in summer, like suddenly it's okay to be a relaxed parent.

I love you.

Yeah, mine's going to be no hot food then, like it would just be picky platters of stuff I don't want to Yes, So if we just eat cold it's off a platter, then that's going to be my summer.

Shrugs.

It's fine kids, exactly.

This immediately puts to mind for me.

I have a friend who is a friend of the pod.

He listens every week.

His name is Joe, Hi Joe, Hi Joe, and I met him during the pandemic when our kids would go to the same playground together and that was the only place where you could socialize with anyone was outside of the playground, and we became friends there.

And every day an ice cream truck would come by the playground, and I noticed that every day Joe would shrug and his kids would go and buy an ice cream with some money he gave them.

And one day I was like, because.

I would be always wrestling with whether or not my kids deserved and ice cream that day, Well, you had one yesterday, You've had four this week and so on.

I said to him, but your kids have an ice cream every day?

Why is that?

And then he turns to me he goes, it's a pandemic, Amelia, they get an ice cream every day.

And I was like, that's brilliant.

Yeah, we just need to care a little less don't we shrugs all around this summer?

All right?

I've got an am I the ausehole for you, and I want you too to be the judge and jury on this one, okay.

Please, Well I love judging.

Bring it on.

I did one semester of law at Uni.

I shall channel it now for you.

Mon's I did a semester of law too, So between the two of us we're basically lawyers.

Kim Kardashi and move over.

And I've seen legally blonde so many times, so excellent, We've got it.

I object Exhibit eight.

This is the scene.

It's a sunny afternoon.

My seven year old's birthday treat was yochi okay, with a few of his friends.

So the kids are sugared up to the eyeballs.

Ye, So we decide me and a few other parents to run it off at the nearby public square.

Let the record show this particular public square.

This public space is described by the urban landscapers who built it as playful, okay.

And at the center of this public square is something they call a ripple lounge, and it is the scene of the alleged crime.

I have provided a photograph for you both to see the ripple lounge.

She's entered it into evidence.

Yes, we see, thank you.

Mon's Please note on this official photograph from the website, there are children playing and climbing.

On the ripple lounge.

There is okay, yes, enter the man.

Now.

He's sitting there on the ripple lounge having a peaceful afternoon moment in the sun.

Let the record show he was there first.

Can I ask raffly how old?

Oh?

Yeah, he would have been late fifties, early sixties.

Do you want more descriptors?

I feel like that's going to stereotype him, and I want you, as the judge and jury, to remain neutral.

So my mum radar on as it always is, And like the kids start to play and they're climbing on the ripple lounges and no one's crashing into him or touching him.

They're just playing around him.

There's a lot of noise and movement and play around him, and I can feel sort of the air change and I can see him getting huffy.

And he stands up and he marches over to me and says, and I quote, are you the parent?

And I was like yes, and he said, get some fucking control.

Of your kids.

You are what's wrong with parenting today.

Now, I anticipated this because I could see him.

I profiled him.

I was like, I could see him getting huffy.

I could see the kid.

I was watching the kids, thinking, oh, if anyone touches him, he might throw a leg out or something.

So I was anticipating it.

I would say, maybe I was spoiling for it.

And so instead of saying, oh, I'm so sorry, I channeled the power of this podcast and you two.

I said, sir, you're in a public space and that means there's going to be children around and you have to share this space with other people.

And to that, he said, get fucked fuck off.

You're what's wrong with society.

And then I doubled down.

I said, what's wrong with society is that there's an obesity epidemic and we need our kids to move their bodies and guess where they do that in a public space.

He said fuck off and he walked off, and I said, sayah, I was like, so make later not my finest moment, Okay, I admit I saw red.

I matched his energy.

All the other school parents who were there said nothing, Stacy, he was there first.

Am I guilty of public NUS's parenting.

He was there first, but I know what a people pleaser you are, so I want to say massive points for standing up for yourself and for your children and doing that be Goes.

I don't know if I would of I feel like I would have gone, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, and like ushered them off to the side.

But you're right, it is a public space.

You have to expect the public to be there.

But unfortunately for you, Mons assholes are also part of the public and he was there, Like he can be bothered if he wants.

It's his space to be in as well.

But I completely think your kids are justified.

Like we have no tolerance for anyone anymore being slightly annoying in a space that we are.

Do you agree, Look, I think Mon's is the problem with society today.

Was that the phrase you're what's wrong the problem.

It's not Steve Bannon, it's Mons.

Such a monster, such a monster.

I'm so impressed that you had the composure to bring up the term public space.

I think that's such a profound point you made to him, because you essentially gentle parented him.

He met you with aggression and then you met him with respectful parenting, yeah, and mean until the end you got to leave.

With I had tone in my voice.

I had tone.

I had the tone of like a mum in a Bunnings car park where you're like, stay close to me, get in the car.

There's cars everywhere.

You're in a car park.

It was that sort of a lot of click action.

I feel like the thing is that when someone does criticize your parenting in public, it brings up the adrenal gland.

Something really physiological happens, I think, because it must tap into a kind of primal You mentioned the mum raider and how he was on your radar, Like, that's so true.

Mom's how you described that when you're out in public with your kids, this constant scanning for situations that might occur exactly like the one you described there.

But I'm wondering whether us being in vigorous agreement sort of conflicts with what we talked about in the last segment.

A little bit, I'll explain what I mean.

We talked about letting the world do your parenting for you.

Now, so true, this man, I don't like his language, but he was doing some parenting for you.

Essentially, saying one, there are grumpy, unreasonable people in the world.

Two, when they are around, you have to give them wide berth, fairly or not.

And three you got to figure out how to de escalate with said grumpy people.

So you know, I put that to the jury.

Was he not doing your parenting for you in exactly the way we talked about in the last segment.

If he was, and I like this point, but shouldn't he have gone after the kids instead of me and said to the kids, I'm trying to have a relax here, have some respects.

Let me ask you how you would have responded to that, assumeing he didn't use the F word and he said to them exactly what you said, I'm trying to have some space here, What would you have done?

Good question.

I probably would have said, fair ball, like fair gang, I agree, like go and run around somewhere else.

Kids.

Is it possible for you do you think in that situation to set aside that sort of physiological response we talked about and not interrationally.

I don't think so.

No, it's not right.

Like my heart was pounding when I was doing this, and I was all like around horned up when he was like screaming in my face.

And you're so right, Like if you saw someone say that, like as much as you go, he shouldn't have approached me.

If you'd seen him speak to your kids, you would have felt the same thing and gone, don't speak to my kids that way.

Would you have done?

Like if he was fully polite about it and was just like kids, I'm just trying to have a moment here.

Have had a really busy, stressful day.

Can you please go and.

Play over there?

Yeah, I guess that's fine, but it's really hard for us to like override.

That stress there is that, isn't it that I think this used to happen more.

Don't you feel like that was more of a thing where the community parented.

Kids would not be unusual to be out and someone say keep it down or get down off there.

That would happen to me at the Supermarke.

I'd be running my.

Mum's trolley around the place, and I remember people used to tell me off.

My mom didn't say anything to them.

I was suitably chided, like, maybe it's just something we've got to deal with a bit more.

We actually don't like I think now that you're playing it out like that.

If someone said something.

To my kids, I think I'd be feel really defensive.

Yeah, and like get out of it.

Have you ever told a child not to do something?

You just don't you leave it up to the parent now?

No, And I think people are afraid in so many situations, like my mum had my daughter and she ran off in a public space down a road towards where cars were coming and multiple people were coming the other way, and no one even stuck their arm out.

I think it's like people are really scared to parent other people's kids for them now, whereas you used to kind of be able to do that and keep them in line.

But maybe we should, like maybe it should be a bit more of a community effort.

Again, as long as they're addressing the children in a sort.

Of respectful yeah, polite.

Wait.

I don't think this man was in the headspace to parent appropriately, let alone gently.

But I wonder if we do need to let people parent are children a bit more.

Yeah.

In conclusion, Mons, you have been found not guilty.

You are free to go.

No parole asshole not the asshole, definitely will.

I do want to make this a semi regular thing.

Maybe listeners have some mivsholes that they want to share with us, and we will act as dury for them.

As you can see where it hugely qualified and very fair.

Yes, yes, DM the instagram which is at Parenting out Loud.

Let's hit up the things getting us through the week and bring you our recommendations.

These are kind of like products we would marry if we could, or the wholesome random craft things that Amelia finds.

Will it be painted rocks this week?

Will it be the reject shop?

Who knows?

What have you got, Amelia?

So I've actually got something a bit related to what you were talking about before.

Remember when you said that part of this sort of parenting less strategy is to hand your kids a calendar.

Yeah, an independence activity calendar here.

Yeah.

My wreck for the week, completely independent of that, was to keep the free calendar that the chemist gives you at the start of the year.

And I'm going to explain why.

But you know that calendar, Yeah, yeah, it's usually got a picture of a bird, yes, you know, like a bird or maybe like a cold and flu medication.

They give them out at the pharmacy and you generally put it in the recycling.

Well, I'm here to tell you you got to keep it, and you've got to collect a couple.

If you've got a couple of kids, give one to each child.

And what I want you to do with it is during school holidays or at ahead of any school holidays, sit down with the kids much as months was describing before, and have them illustrate or write each day what the plan is.

And the reason I do this with my kids is because apparently boys in particular really need a plan.

I mean, I think we all love a plan, but apparently boys really need to know what's happening next.

And anecdotally I do notice that boys are more likely to be like, well, what are we doing after this?

What are we doing after that?

So it gives them a sense of like I can see their shoulders like sort of fall down a little bit from their ears unshrugged.

Because the peace of knowing in that disruptive, hurly burly world of school holidays, what's happening every day, it can be really powerful for them in knowing what to expect.

So basically, use the free calendar every school holidays.

That's me clever?

How tiny are your kids writing in these calendar squares?

Because my kid's handwriting is like font size nine hundred.

I do think it works best with a biro, Like don't go in with the crayons or the texters.

And we're not doing like our by hour activity.

It's more overarching.

Five more day tananas.

Yeah yeah, yeah, love it.

Run your what's your stacey?

Mine this week is a piece of jewelry, So treat yourself.

This is what I'm telling you to do for the start of the year.

I have never had as many compliments as when I wear this necklace which I'm wearing today.

I love that necklace.

It's a charm necklace.

So my recommendation is to get a chunky charm necklace.

It doesn't matter where you choose to get this from.

Mine.

One's from a place called Gimme Store, so she's like an Aussie lady startup and stuff is really cool.

It's like between eighty two, one hundred and twenty dollars.

I think we're talking so nice quality jewelry, like you'll have it for a long time, but we're not talking crazy heirlooms.

And can we run through the charms.

There is a chili pepper.

Chili pepper.

There's a cowboy boot, there's a little stone and a.

Star is the stone in your birthstone?

No, nothing to do with me.

It's just for vibes.

Is it like the Pandora bracelet for millennials?

Kind of yes, it is like a cooler version of that.

Yeah, you choose the charms that go on there.

No, you don't choose them.

They're already pre made.

You don't even have to think about story.

They're just there selected the sets.

Well, there you can go and get one of those.

I don't have time for that.

I want someone to just tell me my personality.

So that's what this necklace is.

But why I think they're great.

And I've got another one for my birthday as well that I love.

That's all just mixed like summery little shells.

It looks kind of greasihan.

I think it's good because you don't you just don't know what to wear, and you just wear the same thing every or at least I do.

I feel like I just wear the same three things.

If I put this on for some reason, it just.

Pulls everything and you're doing that thing that I've always envied where people pull off the la necklace, stacking them stacking necklaces that's what I'm going to do in twenty twenty six.

I'm gonna stack next.

Yes, so just get a chunky necklace, I promise.

I don't know why You'll get so many compliments and you look like you made effort when you did not make effort.

I thought you really liked spicy food.

But that's.

I was like, is it a Taylor Swift cowboy reference?

I don't know, or Beyonce.

No.

I do love a bit of country music, though kind of against my will.

My husband's convinced me to like country music now, so maybe that's for him.

Get a chunky necklace.

Gimme store have great ones?

G I mm so good.

I'm just looking at them.

Can I say something mean?

I just feel like this is gonna date really badly, Like it's gonna look good for this summer, and then in five years time, you're going to be doing an Instagram story about look at the.

Dumb necklace I wore in twenty and twenty six.

Like you did, Like you know, this is how you end up play sports.

Sorry, you are actually ruthless.

Yeah, you are so ruthless.

Love it.

Tell them to all the people that have complimented me.

You stick with your boring necklaces.

Okay, mine's fun.

Okay, my recommendation.

Sorry, I'm stuck on this fucking ugly neckplace.

Sorry, Stacey, it's so.

Ugly that Mons did tell me at the beginning of this I really need to go on and make up.

So I think we've both been treated to her attack today.

I don't.

I've never had as many compliments on it, that's true.

Are you changing your mind?

Am I?

In fact of the asshole?

I am?

I am?

Okay.

My recommendation is also something you can buy.

Who has time to wash their hair?

Not me.

That's one of my shrugs as well.

Mons, when not washing hair.

Every time I.

Use dry shampoo, and I've tried them all, they always just my hair just looks dirty with dry shampoo in it.

Yeah, it just makes feel powdery and chalky.

Enter Ka teen air wash dry shampoo.

I don't know what black magic fuckery this company is doing.

This is the same company that makes.

This sort of hair mask that has like a cult following that repairs your hair.

The great thing about the hair mask is that you don't need to wash it out, yes, which is great for masters because I hate standing in the shower naked.

Yeah.

This kaighteen air wash dry shampoo not sponsored content.

I bought this off my own back.

It's just a spray.

It's not a powder.

It's just like a spray and you only need one spray.

It says on the bottle like less is more like do not use too much and your hair just completely resets and it looks like it's.

Just been washed.

It's amazing.

Now great.

The bad news is it's expensive.

So it was forty four dollars for this little bottle.

But guys, time is money and you're saving time by not washing your hair.

Love it.

I've got to say, I didn't want it to be a good wreck, but it is not.

It is.

Yeah, love it.

I don't deserve your compliments.

I'm awful.

That's all we have time for.

But thanks for listening this far.

And if you followed this show in the last week, like if you have actually pushed follow on your podcast.

App, thank you, thank you so so much for doing that.

Now, if you know someone who also believes that kids should be in.

Public places, who loves.

A big, chunky necklace, and who likes to have fights with boomers in parks, send them this show.

And tell them come and join and be part of our tribe.

Okay, that's how we grow this little podcast pocket.

But don't send it to a boomer because they need to get off their phone.

Yeah, they're on there too much.

Send it to them so true.

Good luck this week with parenting less.

Okay, that's the big challenge.

Just do less click shrug, clickles, quick less, careless, quick.

Less shrug shrug it are click less, shrug more.

That's it.

A big thanks to our team, Junior content producer Tessa Kotovich, Senior producer Lee Porgus, and Executive producer Sashtanic, the group ep Is, Ruth Devine, have a great week.

Stacy and Amelia and all of you out there.

Will be back next Saturday morning.

Bye bye.

MoMA MEA acknowledges the traditional owners of the land on which we have recorded this podcast.