Bo I needs a break.

I don't know why I sounded like the extors is there.

Yeah, Remember I was a.

Smoker Camsy Media large.

So Rory, what's the best way to embezzle money from the government?

Why do you?

Why do you ask?

It?

Is though you think I'm some sort of hardened criminal on this podcast, and that's what I bring to the show, is knowing how to embezzle money.

Also, I want to backtrack and say thank you for respecting me enough to know what embezzle means.

First thing that came to uh to.

Mind, and this has made way off for some reason, my brain was like the horse races.

Okay, so you're the So you work in a town with the horse track.

Okay, okay, well we all aspire to the greater heights than mine is horse track racing in town?

Okay.

Well, this was a tough one.

I didn't expect you have a embezzlement scheme in mind.

Each of these is a test, right If you answered right away, we might be worried.

That's a good point.

But the answer I was looking for was establish a successful psychic practice and bewitch a city official to lavish.

You with gifts.

Okay, This is going to sound crazy, but psychically that was going to be my second thing.

I was going to say, so believe that or not.

This week we're going deep inside the wild world of psychics slash mediums who pray on innocent mayors in France Dushane, which means I think, don't change the channel if Google can be believed.

Welcome back to Crimeless, the podcast that celebrates the amazing creativity of the.

World's dumbest criminals.

I'm Josh Dean and I am Rory Scovel.

Okay, Rory.

Today's story, as I said, takes place in France.

Have you ever been to France.

I've been to France for my honeymoon.

Was it as romantic as they say?

It was very romantic.

We rented a car after being in Paris a little bit and then drove to the south of France and then over to Italy and it was great.

I got a flat tire immediately in a small town and my wife had to go into a pub and speak a little bit of French to see if anyone could help.

Us with the tire.

Did they they did?

An old man showed up and I thought we would need more than just changing a tire type situation.

But I found all the tools before he got there, and I started to change the tire, and then he showed up and was like, oh, you Americans, don't you need someone else to change your tire for you?

And it's only because I didn't think we had the tools all.

Right, for all of our fans in the South of France, including old menufixed tires.

This actually takes place in the South of France.

I think you went to the South of France and took a left.

This would have been if you'd taken a right.

So yep.

So our story involves a mayor, a psychic, and a disembodied voice from the Great Beyond.

Also a war between nudists and swingers.

Can't believe I haven't heard this already, So first.

Let's meet the mayor who's the star of our story.

His name is uh and pardon, I can't believe I get to say this unironically, but pardon my French.

His name is Gille de Tour.

He's a polished looking middle aged guy with salt and pepper hair, looks snappy in a dress shirt, and until things went sideways, he's just another government suit unclear whether or not he wears a beret.

God, I love that name.

Jill Niciel.

He was born the seaside town of Agde, a little over an hour from the Spanish border, and his father was the deputy mayor in the nineteen seventy so he's a second generation politician.

Of course.

He started his career as a secret service officer and a policeman and then returned home to run for office, and as a hometown boy with deep roots, he was very well liked by the people.

Jiel began his first term in two thousand and one and was basically unstoppable.

He won five elections in a row.

Have you ever run for anything outside of student government?

No?

Were you student body president?

No?

No, I don't even know what imbezzel means.

They don't let you fair, fair, fair.

So Jill was on track to make history as the longest sitting mayor in the city's history.

All around, just the highly respected member of the community.

Yep.

Now this is a tourist town.

It swells from around thirty thousand people, so you know, decent sized town on an average winter day, to almost three hundred thousand during summer.

Why do you think that is.

I mean, people are out and about, they're ready to be and people want to be.

In France, it gets it all times bigger though.

Yeah, well there.

I mean, I couldn't tell you why, but I just assume, like anywhere else, people are ready to party.

Two hundred and eighty thousand people on their honeymoons.

I think a lot of people get married right before summer kicks in.

All right, I'm sorry, that's incorrect.

Oh okay, Now.

Do you know what a naturist resort is is that where they're like, hey, no clothes, just come in, Let's just be Adam and Eve for his lung.

Let's let's be Adam and Eve before Apple's correct.

Okay, that's correct.

So this town has a nickname, Like New York, it's sometimes called the Naked City, only in this case it's because it's home to one of the world's most popular nudist resorts.

Oh my god.

So, but you're saying, just to clarify for our listeners, you're not saying the town is a nudist.

It contains the largest nudist resort.

But I think there's a significant amount of spillover, got it.

Okay, I think the borders.

I don't know, like what kind of walled fences or walls we have around nudist resorts.

It's a it's a place of freedom.

So I'm guessing, like, you know.

Okay, thank you for that, because I wanted to continue to picture something very fun and so I'm going to.

Okay, great, and we're not just talking about nude beaches.

And in Nature's resort, you grocery shop, you go to the bank, you ride your vest bow with a baguette under your arm, all in the nude.

Oh.

One of the local beaches was nicknamed the Bay of Pigs, and not because it had a connection to Cuba.

It was because of the amount of naked people who sun themselves there, which does not paint the sexiest picture of the clientele.

I gotta say, yeah, it's definitely not complimenting your clientele in any way whatsoever.

Get out there, you naked pigs, go soak.

Come some of that son, turn into bacon as fast as you can.

It's a great French accent.

Thank you.

If I didn't pay all that money for voice lessons, I would be upset.

But it's paying off anyway.

All these naked folks running around has created a bit of a problem.

Can you guess what that problem might be?

Um?

No, No, can't.

Agda has become a hot spot for swingers and sex parties.

Okay, well, I mean I guess.

I just thought that was a part of the not part of the problem.

I thought that was part of the solution.

Well, it's created some tension in the community of nudists because more traditional naturists are simply in this for the freedom man.

They think swingers have sullied the whole reputation of this beautiful practice.

Interesting, so things got.

Weird and even dangerous.

According to a two thousand and eight report in the Sunday Times, three separate sex clubs were set on fire, and everyone suspected that radical naturists were behind it.

I said, naturists, naturists.

I like both naturists.

I'm a naturist.

However, that's the story for another episode.

This is just providing some very important, full frontal context for the setting where this takes place.

So wow, that's a real tease right there, Josh.

So, anyway, we're here to talk about the mayor of this naked town.

He's fully clothed for the purposes of this episode.

And in twenty twenty, he's celebrating his fifth win when a colleague, a local cop, introduces him to someone.

He was like, you got to meet this woman.

She's a healer in a medium.

She's Toady magnifique.

And you should also know that the mayor's got some daddy issues.

He's always felt like he lived in the shadows of his father.

He was an important debuty mayor when Jill was a kid, but then his dad passed away, and ever since then, Jill had been struggling to cope with it.

He had even been getting in touch with the spiritual side, thinking about the meaning of everything, the afterlife, even considering some fringe practices to try and stay in touch with his dad.

All very classic mayor activity, you know, total extracurricular activity.

So when this cop says you should speak to my psychic, he takes some it seriously, right, He's like, maybe I should think about this, And three months later he does.

He makes an appointment with a woman named Sophia Martinez.

Have you ever consulted a psychic?

I haven't, and part of me feels like they know I'm probably never going to show up.

How about your wife?

She goes to psychic.

She's never gone to a psychic, but she is on the verge of becoming a mayor, if you know what I mean.

This becomes slang for people who visit psychics.

We got a real mayor over here, or nudists.

We had a real nude French.

Mayor over here.

So this woman, Sophia Martinez, was, in her own words quote, a specialist in the cleansing of energy for people and places.

She's in her forties.

She lives in town with her six kids.

From three marriages.

France Man yep.

Her services include hypnosis, tarot card readings, even seances.

A few former clients have reported objects flying around the room during sessions and that she often reveals details about their lives that she could never have possibly known.

And her clientele includes intellectuals, architects, executives, even cops.

So the mayor's in good company.

He's not like being crazy or extremely woo.

By going to Sophia.

Okay, got it, So let's not judge the mayor yet.

So anyway, Sophia and Jiels have their first communication session.

She tells him things she couldn't possibly have known about his dad, like a nickname his dad had used for his last partner, and Gill walks away from this meeting convinced that the woman is the real deal.

He's like this this I trust this woman.

Yeah.

So they start having regular sessions, often by phone, and according to the mayor, their relationship is amicable, although some witnesses have heard him call her darling.

And also our listeners should know, just because this is all theater of the mind.

These two people are fully clothed during these sessions, but if you want a picture that they're both naked.

It does add a little spice to the story.

It does, And to be honest, we didn't look that up.

They could be.

I mean, were assuming he was fully clothed because the mayor generally wore clothes.

But yeah, let's go there.

Gill's a clothing guy.

Run wild people, and so you know, he starts to call her darling, and then a few sessions in things take a turn.

Uh oh, that's after the break.

So one day, Shiel's talking with Sophia as he normally would.

I imagine him giggling while twirling the cord of his landline, a very timely reference.

People are like, what the fuck are you talking about?

When he hears another voice.

On the line, you didn't see this coming, okay, it was it was his dad.

It was his dad.

Damn it, Rory, you're too good at the show.

There you go.

You're too good.

You're too good.

You see, you are a master criminal.

This is what embezzling means.

It is gonna it's all gonna come around.

So, yes, this voice is deep masculine, definitely not Sofia and introduces himself to Gille as Papa.

Oh, here we go.

The mayor believes that Papa is none other than I was going to ask you to guest, but you already guest.

Yeah, solved it his dad.

Yeah, why wouldn't you believe that?

Of course he's on a phone, living in the afterlife.

That's still a primary form of a communication.

And you definitely would not suspect that someone else was doing the voice, right, And.

Of course it's dad, right.

Of course, his dad was like, look, I could just come visit you as a ghostly you know, being, and we could cut out the middleman over here that you're paying for.

However, why would we do that.

I mean, that's what mediums are for, I think, right, yeah, exactly right, Okay.

So Jille is convinced by Sophia's power, of her ability to summon voices from the afterlife, she was a conduit for spirits.

And these conversations pick up in frequency, often ten times a day.

Okay, I don't talk to my wife in the same house ten times a day.

Fair point, nor do I.

Jill's maybe a little vulnerable.

I don't want to judge yet.

Yeah.

So they're having these discussions of incredible depth.

The kindie says he could never have had with the regular old Sophia given her quote intellectual capabilities.

Man man, so he thinks Sophia is too dumb to be making this up.

But I wonder who's the dumb one.

Yeah, So the mayor starts to see Papa as a spiritual mentor, asking questions about life, death, the meaning of it all.

I can't even imagine what advice he could be giving.

Back to the mayor.

I'm I don't know.

I'm just fascinated by the idea of someone just falling from them.

It feels like hypnosis, you know what I mean.

I've never been hypnotized, but I live in a world of skepticism about it.

However, if someone's like, all hypnotize you right now.

I don't believe that it won't happen, So who knows.

Maybe Jill is, like you said, wildly vulnerable.

And at no point is he like are you sure that you sure this ain't some other person?

Like how does this How does this papa sound like his papa?

This is the guy running the town.

This is also the guy in charge.

Of five consecutive elections.

He's he's an unbeatable incumbent mayor who just keeps winning.

Yeah, you know the French, they're romantics.

Well, now he has a connection to the afterlife and he can tell all those ghosts, Hey, will you go scare voters that we're going to vote for the other person not to show up tomorrow.

It's true.

One of their favorite topics, One of Papa's favorite topics on the call is Sophia.

Yeah, he says, Sophia special.

She's a saint.

Jill was chosen to protect her and her family.

And there's one real blockbuster of a revelation.

In a previous life, Jill was an Egyptian priestess who had a child with Tutan common okay, and that child was reincarnated in.

Who my god, Sophia.

Yeah, obviously, I mean you can tell there's a familial connection.

I mean, yeah, she always there's in common.

Love that someone says that to you and you don't go what instead you go huh oh oh neat.

I haven't got to that part of our scrap book yet.

I mean, really swinging for the fences with this reincarnated like could have used like, you know, an old French guy.

Nope, you know that these two con artists were just talking like do.

We throw the tutin common at him?

Let's I think he'd go for it.

Let's just see.

So like basically, at this point, he's convinced that he's cosmically entwined with this one.

Yeah, she's the reincarnated form of his former daughter that he'd had as a woman with tudin common yright.

So yeah, naturally he's all in, can you see where this is going?

Yeah?

I can see where it's going, and I know that the word mbezzlement is involved.

So Gill starts paying for things her birthday parties and vacations.

He hires a personal driver to take her kids to school.

He gave a relative's cushy jobs at town hall he funded her passion project, which was naturally a comic book yeah, titled Sophia From Darkness.

To Light Yep.

The mayor even helped plan and paid for her her lavish third wedding in a castle part of Chateau, and then walked her down the aisle.

Yes, unclear if Papa was in attendance.

It's also not one hundred percent clear at first where the mayor was getting all this money.

He's just a humble civil sermon.

Yeah, you're starting to see it's you know, we look at you look at someone like Sophia like this as being a criminal, and yet at the same time you're like, what's what's the criminal activity?

Right?

So far crime so far, wildly innocent and wildly respect I like what I'm hearing, all right, good.

Good, But people start to suspect that Jill may be raiding.

The town's coffers.

Yeah.

For example, Papa told the mayor that Sophia needed a new veranda to better serve her clients.

So Gille hires a contractor to redo the veranda.

But the contractor is a little bit nervous because he finds out that the city is actually paying for it.

So according to that contractor.

Gille says they would fudge an invoice and borrow the money from the city's sports club budget solved.

I mean, look, this is why he's a five time champion.

Really, I mean I got to imagine on some level, embezzlement is happening at every you know, like I mean, maybe you're not paying off the medium who's the reincarnated form of.

Your daughter with toot in common.

Yeah, but like you know, you're giving someone a job or moving somebody's resume at the top.

That's not embezzlement.

Okay, that's corruption.

I guess corruption is what I'm saying.

For me to believe that.

Not every government official corrupt on some level, this is how skeptical I've become.

Yeah.

So anyway, this kind of creative accounting goes on for three years, oh Gial not making the French cops seem super sharp.

Yeah, but you know we're not here to judge them.

Yeah, but not everyone was as entranced as Gille.

And in October of twenty twenty three, the mayor ex wife, you know, we haven't talked about her at all, but there's Geraldine, his ex wife.

She's had enough.

She called the cops.

She alleged that Sophia has bewitched her ex husband Shocker.

She also suspected he was stealing money from the city to fund the relationship.

Yeah, police, I think they call them gen Darmes there Lane John Darmes.

It just let police.

Yeah, let police sounds better than John's arms.

Is that how easy French is?

Just love love love, okay, lo police.

Somebody called the police.

The police.

I love that his ex wife's name is Geraldine.

That means at some point when they were together, people called them Jair.

Jeel and jer jeelan jer Jill and jer eh Jilla Jerier.

The boss of le police is in the house.

You sound like you were doing a like a morning radio show hosted by two French people.

Oh you're listening to low radio.

Jee.

I'm Jill, I'm Jill, and this is jer in the morning.

I was about to say that in French, but I don't know how to say in the morning either, do I I could, honestly, I could have riffed for ten more minutes on that if I knew an ounce of French.

Well, I'm gonna go back to French.

Police wire tapped Jill's phone and pull the phone records in.

The past year.

Wow, they counted a jaw dropping three thousand, three and seventy five telephone conversations between Gildatur and Sophia.

Mark in one year.

Yeplank, he's the math on that.

How many calls per day?

It's ten per day at least.

I don't think I've I don't think I've done that many phone calls in ten years.

I'm sure I haven't.

I haven't.

I'd also want to just point out that this is all at the town hall.

This is like during working hours.

Oh my yeah, yeah yeah, yes, So like is the town just falling apart?

Like who's picking up the trash?

Like the bills getting paid?

Like?

Well, The good thing is no one can tell because the nudity distracts that anyone from any issues.

And also they've got their own battles to fight.

You know, who's allowed to have sex and who isn't.

You got people burning down swinger clubs exactly.

Geal is hidden by the atrocities of this no one notices.

H So the cops also when they got these calls, they heard what Jeal couldn't that the voice of Papa wasn't a spirit from the Gray Beyond, or even an accomplice who was doing the voice.

Rory, was it her?

It was?

It was She's that good apparently.

Ugh, that's amazing.

She was so good at throwing her voice that he thought, not only is this a man, but this is my father?

Right.

I mean a lot of questions about Giel, but maybe she's just like truly that talented.

Yeah, she's got a she's got a talent, and I'm not gonna lie.

She knows how to she knows what she's doing, she knows how to use it.

She applied it well.

So both she and Jille are brought into the police station for questioning, and she immediately comes clean to cops.

She had invented the silly voice.

But when she was just a kid, a petite enfant as they say, she had a rough childhood and Papa was an imaginary friend who was always there for her.

Did you ever have an imaginary friend as a kid.

I think I did, but like it lived inside me, like the kid from the Shining.

That's dark.

I had three I had three of them.

You had three, yeah, Ronnie Princess and OJ System OJ System.

Yeah, it was a more innocent time so we did not know things that we knew about OJ later.

But yeah, apparently, according to my mom, I called him OJ system, and I would like make the family stop.

The car and pick them up.

Often like okay, they would just be I guess we just drive by and see him on the road and be like, we gotta we got to pick them up.

You know, these, uh, these interviews before two people decide to work together got to get more specific, Like we got to know this going in.

I can't.

I meant to bring them.

I love your parents rolling their eyes like, well, I guess we have to go out of our way to go pick up a non existent piece of air.

Anyway, So Sophia is great at this.

You know, she's she's bringing this imaginary friend who she claims she had named Papa as a child, and then she just incorporated it into her practice and people reacted, they responded well to it, so it just became part of her thing.

Yeah, I think that's it great.

I honestly think it's great.

She's just passing the ball around.

She's helping friends get jobs, is all she's doing.

I'm bringing Ronnie and Princess to the next tapic.

That does feel like nepotism.

So for the record, she stands by her psychic abilities and powers, though she does own up to tricking Leameyer.

She admitted that she quote couldn't stand seeing all that money around.

She also grew addicted to the attention.

The more I had, the more I asked for.

She claimed that she even knew she was being wired tapped at the end, but she couldn't stop talking in that voice.

The power of Papa was too much.

I love that she knew she was getting wired tapped, and she was just like, we nothing stops this train.

We keep going.

It is what she said direct quote.

I've entered a role playing game and I can't get out, like someone who drinks and can't stop.

I still I want it noted.

I still don't think she's done anything wrong.

Yeah, I mean right, because it's not like, well, I guess we don't know.

Even if she were to order him to embezzle money like she's is that committee.

Like if I ask if I today right now, say Rory, I demand that you go and rob a bank, Like if you go and rob a bank, I don't think I can be arrested for that.

I agree, that's what I mean, I think that her power of persuasion, that's on him to be so gullible to fall for it.

Yeah, I mean, and he's like so dumbstruck that he doesn't even believe the cops until they played him a tape of her demonstrating the voice, which is like a really sad scene in.

A movie in front of other adults, having to like sit there and be like, oh, okay, yeah, no, I see, I see what you mean by she's the one.

Doing both of them.

Okay, got it, got it?

You know?

Do you think at any point he tried to play the card?

Guys, I've been investigating this for three years.

It was obviously I know that it's fake.

I set her up.

Yeah, this is a setup.

I'm the genius here.

Yeah, obviously, pop, Come on, what a lot.

Of people can't believe he's still won a sixth year.

That good?

Oh well, he's like you can imagine, he's devastrated, betrayed, even embarrassed.

He's charged with Oh gosh, I have these in French, so bear with mere illegal.

Didn't tell you no idea what that is?

De tournment defon public.

I'm guessing that's embezzlement.

And corruption, corruption, corruption, the corruption.

He spends three months in pre trialed attention, resigned from his position as mayor so No sixth term, and in a public statement, apologized for any wrongdoing, but he made sure to qualify that he was quote first and foremost, a victim.

I think we take some issue with that.

I mean, I look, I just see the good in people.

I believe him too.

I think they should have this, should this of all should have been just allowed to happen.

Well, Sophia gets charged with embezzlement and tax fraud, and she also served three months in prison before her trial.

I don't know, this doesn't seem right, France.

We got to talk about your I feel like you're are we not innocent until proven guilty?

Over there?

No, I don't know if you noticed, But nobody's really doing that anymore.

No, Nope, guilty, no matter what.

Even if you just think they're guilty, they're guilty.

Just get you, just say guilty, and so everyone goes, you got it, look guilty, look guilty, and some of it.

She spends in solitary confinement because the other inmates think she's a witch.

Yeah I get it, Yeah I might she might be yeah.

I mean, I don't know that the others get to decide that, but you know I like that.

France is like, look, we're going to vote on everything.

Put the witch in solitary.

Okay, clap if you think she's a witch and it freaks you out.

She's ultimately released under judicial supervision, but was banned from practicing as a psychic, which I'm not totally sure how you enforce, right, like tinfoil hat, Like, what do you do?

How do you stop someone from being a psychic?

I don't know.

How do you even get that business license?

Like is that are you going to licensed?

And people are like, all right, look, go ahead and tell people you can talk to the beyond.

But it's seven percent.

As for the city of Agda, they've got a new mayor, an uncertain future, and some promising developments on the new test front.

Who was going to leave you hanging here?

Thank you to speak?

Yeah, you know what I'm saying.

I know what you did right there, I got it.

I'm thrilled to report that there's been progress a truce between the swingers and naturists and what led to this de talent any theories?

Well, I here's what this is not going to be correct.

But I'd like to believe that the naturists finally realized that sexual deviance is consu entered somewhat natural, and I hope that they came to terms with that.

Also, and maybe this is a controversial opinion, that they realized that, like one of the fun things about being naked is having sex with other people, right, yeah, yes, yes, And so you're wrong, of course, Okay, although you're right.

I mean, I feel like that was a good answer, But the real answer is COVID nineteen.

Oh, It's always COVID.

Perhaps not surprisingly, Agda was hit very hard by the coronavirus.

At one point early in the pandemic, officials found that thirty percent of nature Is tested positive, which was four times higher than any other city in the surrounding area, which would seem to indicate they weren't getting a little close, if you know what I'm saying.

Right, But also when they say four times higher than the other towns, it's like, because it's summertime and all the other towns are in this town.

I hadn't thought about that.

They're going from thirty thousand people to three hundred thousand people, Like, yeah, that's every town that's in a certain rate.

So I guess the lesson is the naked people learn to wear masks, if not pants.

Yeah, and thus concludes the story of Jill Nagda.

Do you think you're better th embezzlement?

Now?

Could you come up with a scheme this good?

I mean, this is an incredible scheme.

I gotta say, here's where my hat.

My hat is tipped.

Because the confidence to even try to pull off this scheme is incredible.

It's truly like remarkable to I mean, imagine the time that he gets on the phone to hear his papa, and you gotta be thinking the whole time there's no way this will work, and then boom, he goes for it.

Like that just takes sheer confidence.

I'm wildly impressed.

I don't know that I could think of something on this level because I would cave instantly and I'd have to tell them the truth.

You don't think you can make it through three, three and seventy five calls?

I also also, yes, great point.

I wouldn't be able to pull this off because I'd be like, dude, look, I'm stealing from you, Okay, I can't talk to you all the time.

I'm getting this ver to build and it's loud out here.

After the break, our final segment.

All right, this is gonna be fun because I have no idea what's going to happen.

Okay, and isn't that life Say lovey?

You know exactly, Love Say Lovey.

Welcome back to Crime List.

It's everybody's favorite part of the show.

The final segment, Lane, what is our final segment this week?

Today?

We are going to do a tarot card reading.

I have the fun thing about this is I've never done it before, and I would guess that maybe you and Rory also have it.

Never I have done it.

I have done a tarot card reading.

I won't I won't have any sort of like ability to judge your version of it because I'm not that invested in a tarot card reading.

But my wife is a practicing self titled witch.

My wife has done many a tarot card readings, and so she's also offered to do them to me, and they're fascinating.

I love it.

I feel like when we talked about the witch earlier, you didn't mention this your your wife is a witch.

Also, I didn't want to say anything, you know, not in this political climate, you have no idea.

You don't know what it's like right now.

It could be a real, real witch hunt.

And it's because we're getting there and we're.

Getting a little on the nose.

Well, so you might be better at this than we assume.

So what I was thinking was, we'll pull some cards via this website I found.

Okay and Rory, feel free to jump in.

But people turn to tarot cards for like guidance advice.

They're they're looking to get some answers about questions in their lives.

Could be big, could be small.

Rory, what kind of questions does your wife normally answer or look look look for guidance on?

I don't know.

I don't I don't fully know.

I know that when I've done it, and a granted, look I've done it maybe twice and it was a while ago.

But you know, I've realized you can't just out loud before the tarot card reading, just go will I ever have a threesome and see if that's gonna you just you know what I mean, And especially if your wife is pulling the cards.

She's like, no, the car's definitely not.

Oh, I just got an X it's just so that was your card.

We should ask it deeper questions, I think.

Right, yeah, or like I don't know.

Oh, I'm sorry, Josh, is the am I going to have a threesome?

Not a deep question for you?

Yeah, so we'll pull three cards.

So, Rory, what's what's your question?

Will I find uh?

Umm?

Will I find great fortune in my future?

I don't know?

Is that something?

Is that a question?

Yeah, that's a good one.

I'll take bottom right uh, and then uh, I'll take the sixth row left side, and then I'll take the sixth row far right side.

Whoa, I got the four of Pinnacles, the nine of Wands, and the five of Swords.

I hope to god someone is listening at home and just spit their coffee out because they know what these things mean.

I didn't know how much Tara was like Dungeons and Dragons.

Yeah, does that make it cooler?

I'm not gonna lie.

That could be a successful bumper sticker.

That's our merch our merch.

I didn't know how much Taro was gonna be like dungeons and Dragons.

And then it just says, Josh to quote you to give a credit of the quote Josh.

Put a lot of t shirt.

Sorry, I didn't mean to.

I don't mean to make light of this.

Very serious.

So what does this mean, Lane?

What does four of pinnacles mean for me?

So pinnacles are more focused on earthly desires and matter of the earth here and now, representing what's around you.

So I guess maybe if you're looking for like riches.

Or the threesome thing.

Yeah, look, look to your left, look to your right, who's there?

You know there's a painting my dog.

So this is not working out well at all.

We can consider that in the past, so like, that's what you tried before.

So the present, all right, the present?

Nine of one kind of wands.

Wands are symbolic of proactivity and action and attributed to fire.

It's very passionate suit okay, okay, a lot of determination happening, a lot of drives.

So you're motivated for this fortune.

I'm not gonna lie.

I feel that.

I feel that career wise, I feel that personal personal growth wise.

So this is what happens.

You're able to relate to these things and you can decide if it's all less just convincing ourselves or not.

But that is relevant to my current state.

So looking forward to the future, swords, we gotta five five of swords.

I die, Don't I end up dying?

Just Lane, just tell me in the future, do I end up dying?

I don't want to answer that.

For you.

That's that's your own personal churn.

That's your that's your interpretation of reality, that's your thing.

We all have our own.

Yeah.

So the five of swords often signifies conflict betrayal in a situation where someone wins at any cost.

Oh God, it started out, man, my present is so good, and then it's like, but.

But then you're gonna fight everybody and be betrayed.

I think it could also be like you're in your head about it.

So maybe you're thinking, like you're projecting these these feelings of competition, and you know your enemy is actually not your enemy.

Perhaps it's your friend.

Oh okay, okay, Lane, you're like really good at this.

Wow, Google or not, You've got great delivery.

Thanks.

Broy.

Do you feel like you got the answers?

I feel like I am walking away with what I got.

The other times is that if you're willing to connect dots, they will connect, and if you're unwilling and you don't want them to connect.

Then it's it can feel ridiculous, but I will.

Say enough people subscribe to Tarot readings in this form of thing that I just look at and I go, who knows?

Who even?

Why can't this be.

A valid form of getting through life and trying to figure out the puzzle that is our reality?

So I believe it only because the middle part was really good for me.

Yeah, the future, the sword thing, I don't adhere to that.

I believe that Trost, the friends we made along the way.

Here you go.

Josh Crimeless is a production of SmartLess Media, Campside Media, and Big Money Players in partnership with iHeart Podcasts.

It's hosted by Rory Scovel and me Josh Dean.

Our senior producer is Lane Rose.

Emma Stimenov is our associate producer.

This episode was written by Laine Rose and me Josh Dean.

We're sound designed and engineered by Blake Brook with support from Ewan Letram Ewen.

Mark McAdam composed our theme song.

The executive producers at Campside Media are Vanessa Gregoriatis, Matt Cher, and me Josh Dean.

The executive producers for iHeart Podcast and Big Money Players are Jack O'Brien, Lindsay Hoffman, and Matt Abbadoca.

For s Martlow's Media, the executive producers are Will Arnette, Jason Bateman, Sean Hayes, and Richard Corson.

Bernie Kaminski is head of production.

The Associate producer is Mattie McCann.

A special thanks to our operations team, Ashley Warren and Sabina Marra.

Do you have a question, comment, or confession for the Crimeless team, Email us at Crimeless at campsidmedia dot com and if you enjoyed Crimeless, please rate and review the show wherever you get your podcasts.

It helps people find the show and also makes us feel validated, unless you're mean, in which case keep it to yourself.

We'll see you next week.

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