Now stay tuned for X minus one on NBC.

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From the far horizons of the Unknown.

Come transcribe tales of new dimensions in time and space.

These are stories of the future adventures in which you'll live in a million, could be years, on a thousand, maybe worlds.

The National Broadcasting Company, in cooperation with Galaxy Science Fiction Magazine, resents Heck.

He Minus.

Tonight Clifford D.

Simak story of the twenty first century.

How to.

Build your own three dimensional color TV set complete kit screwdriver assembly in three hours.

Now I've done that.

Well, let's see a dog is Man's best Friend.

Build your own dog complete Kit Spaniel model only two hundred.

And fifty dollars.

Yeah, hey, that's it.

My next project, Gordon, is that you where on the terrace.

I'm just finishing a landscape.

Hi?

Yeah, Grace, look did it come?

Don't kiss me, you'll get all full of paint.

I wasn't going to where is the package?

They shed it against the side of the house over there.

See, oh it came.

I want to look at it.

I would have put it down in the basement, but I couldn't lift it.

Hey, this is pretty heavy for a sapaniel.

I can't lift this myself.

I'll start dinner as soon as I finished this part of the picture.

I want to get the grasp while the light's right.

Yes, all right, so I no hurry.

I want to examine the kid anyhow.

Of course, if you didn't waste our money on things like dog kids, maybe we could afford a robot and I wouldn't.

Have to cook.

Yeah, yeah, all right, all right, all.

Right there that should be enough for now.

Light's beginning to get tricky.

Gord Night.

You're not going to open that thing here on the terrace now you make a mess.

Yeah, I just want to see the partler.

You know this thing's too big and heavy to be a dog kid.

Maybe it's a Great Dane.

No, no, no, it can't be.

Look here's the shipping tag.

From how two kits Ink to Gordon Night one dog kit Spaniel model two hundred and fifty dollars paid in full.

The Great Dane costs three hundred and fifty.

Well I can say is that must be the world's biggest spaniel.

Hey, you know that's that's darn funny.

I told you I don't want you fooling around with it up here, and I take it down.

This can't be a dog kid, you know what.

I think it's a robot.

A robot.

But you didn't order a robot, or did you?

No?

No, certainly not.

They made a shipping error.

That's about the size of it.

Ah dog gunn.

I don't have to put this crape back together again and call it express company.

Are you going to return it?

Well, certainly I'm going to return it.

You don't think we can keep it.

Do you?

Why not?

The tag says paid in full, so they can't say we owe them anything.

But it's a robot.

They're expensive.

Well I don't see how the company we'll ever know when inventory time comes around, they'll be short one robot and long one dog.

Because I've always wanted to put together a real robot.

Lord knows when i'd get another chance.

Then it's settled.

No, no, no, it is not settled either.

I'll tell you what I'll I'll put it together just to see what it's like, but I won't activate it.

See I mean, I'll you know, disassemble it right away and ship it back to the company.

Hell, there we are and grace.

Look look at it in that beauty though.

You finished, well, all but the activating grace.

What you know, I'm not just thinking?

How do I know I've got all the parts adjusted properly?

I haven't the remotest idea.

No you know, I mean the only sure away would be the tested you mean activating, well, only for a minute or two, you understand, I mean just to be sure.

Then what Well, then I'll and disassemble it naturally.

Well, all right, as long as you don't take too long.

No, no, no no, I'll have it in a jiffy now here.

Look you see, all I have to do is just put on the activating plate.

Yeah, and turn this lock.

Nut ain't like so now wait a minute, just just the automatic current control.

Yeah there, Now that that should do it.

Now stand back, stand back now I'll turn it on and I hope.

It lay to work.

It'll work.

I followed the directions to the letter.

You're ready.

Now it works, I'll have to oil that joint.

Wait, gratically moving its head.

My name is Alder.

I am a robot.

What is there to do?

Well?

It certainly has a nice voice.

Now now take it easy, but just sit down and rest and we'll have a little talk.

There's no need to rest.

I was made to work.

Well, it's long, is he?

It doesn't need to rest.

I can think of one hundred things for it to do.

Now there's the house and the garden, and Lord, look, Grace.

I wonder if he could learn to cook.

A robot can be taught to do anything a person can do.

Hold on a minute, Albert, please and listen to me.

We can't keep you.

You understand, I mean you were sent here by a mistake.

But I mean, as long as you're activated, there wouldn't be any harm in letting you do.

A few things.

I can do anything good.

The whole house needs a thorough cleaning, Grace.

Then of course I'd like some new drapes for the study.

And the kitchen hasn't been painted for four years.

Then there's that leaky foss.

Oh Lord, well, what's the matter?

Attachments?

There on?

Eddy, He can't do all that stuff without attachments, and they cost almost as much as the robot itself.

And don't worry about attachments.

Just tell me what's to be done.

Well, you heard my wife?

Or what about your grounds?

Oh?

I got a hundred beat up acres and need attention.

But because I realized that that's too much work.

Huh, don't worry about a thing.

I can fix it for you.

Make them necessary, make your own attachment.

Don't worry about a thing.

But oh, for Heaven's sake, stop arguing with him and let him get to work.

I'm arguing.

Morning, Gordon.

The coffee is ready.

I just sleep here.

Oh so good, kept hearing noises all Now that was Albert working in the basement.

Albert, Hey, gosh, that's right.

I forgot.

Robots don't sleep.

He was working all night.

When I came into the kitchen just now, I found the breakfast all prepared.

He can cook.

Isn't that wonderful?

Yeah?

What's he doing now?

I don't know, making something?

I think, Oh, Gordon, he's going to be such a tremendous help to me.

I'll be able to spend more time than ever with my painter.

Now, wait a minute, what makes you think we can keep him?

I mean they're not no grace.

I mean we could get into Trump.

Don't see how.

I'll tell you what.

Why don't you walk over and call on Anson Lee?

He could advise you.

What does he know about it?

He's a lawyer.

Well technically he's a lawyer.

I mean, never seems to work at it anymore.

We have to understand and and that's all.

Look, I understand them, all right.

He's a reactionary, a throwback to the twentieth century, spends all his time lying in a hammock, drinking and reading proofs.

Well, it's what he enjoy he's doing.

I'll bet that guy never assembled a kit in his life.

Can you imagine that?

Well, we all have our peculiarities just the same.

He could give you legal advice.

Well, all right, all right, I'll go over after breakfast if it'll make you feel any happier.

Passed the cream, Oh, have a drink night hard cider?

Made it myself.

Thought you didn't go in for home projects, Lee, I don't.

Making this cighter was the first honest work I've done a year.

I don't doubt it.

Let me.

Time I get a end of work, I look across at your place and I decide against it.

How many rooms have you added to that house since you've got it built?

Eight?

Good?

Lord?

The eight rooms?

No, no, no, it's not hard.

Once you get the next got fun, you just buy a how to kid sure, I know, just follow direction.

Anybody can build a robot on a kitchen table.

Well, no thanks, Why do you say that, I mean about building a robot?

Oh?

I don't know.

I suppose I expect you to start building one anytime.

Now.

You've done everything else.

What's got in the people?

These days and nights?

They just ironed equipped to enjoy the leisure?

That is most of them on me?

I am I ree, I lie in a hammock and now and again I even think.

As I guess that makes me an eccentric.

Have another drink.

Oh no, no, no, no thanks, I'll have to get back to my place.

Albert, Albert, you call me, sir?

Yeah, Albert, listen to me.

I Albert, I have reached a decision about you.

But I'm not Albert, sir.

I huh.

You would hardly expect Albert to be clipping hedges.

If you're not, You're not Albert?

Who are you?

Abe?

Albert is down in the basement.

Oh what are you doing here?

Where did you come from?

If you wish to talk to me, you will have to move along the hedge with me.

I cannot stop working.

Oh okay, okay, move along?

But wait, wait, wait, where did you come from?

Albert made me, Albert made you, and now he's.

Down in the basement working on Alfred.

Alfred another robot.

Certainly that is what Albert is for.

He makes robots.

Oh no, Albert, Oh there you are, Albert.

What's going on here?

I'm reproducing what I have a built in mother.

I don't know why they named me Albert.

I should have had a female name.

But you shouldn't be able to make Roberts.

Look, boss, you worry a lot.

You want robots, don't you.

Well, yeah, I guess everybody could use a robot I make.

I'm making all you need, Albert, Albert, put down that head and listen to me.

I want to have a serious talk.

Sure, boss, what's on your mind now?

Albert?

I just looked through your packing case and I found this tag.

Look it says X one hundred and ninety X Albert.

Don't you understand that means you're an experimental model.

That's correct.

You were never meant to be sold.

That is also correct.

I know.

Don't you see?

That means trouble.

I can't keep you.

I've already taken care of that.

What do you mean I filed off my serial number and replated the surface.

Why why did you do that so.

That they can't come around and take me back.

They made me, and then they got scared and shut me off.

But you're not afraid of me, assembled me and let me go to work.

I'm sticking with you, Boss.

Wait a minute that this could mean a lot of trouble for me, Albert.

No trouble.

They can't prove a thing.

I'll swear that you made me.

I'll not let them take me back.

They will take no chances.

Next time.

They'll break me up for scrap.

But but look, if you make too many robots.

Robots are useful.

You need a lot of them in this place.

Now, don't worry, Boss, everything will work out well.

I'll take good care of you.

Now I must go back to work.

Albert is nearly finished.

Mister Knight.

I'm from the County Tax Office tax assessor.

Oh, I didn't know you Fellas came around more than once a year.

Ordinarily we don't.

This is a special case.

Oh made a lot of improvement in the place the past few days, landscaping, painting, building.

Well, afraid I'll have to boost your assessments.

Somen I say, heard about those robots of you robots personal property, you know, have to pay attacks on them.

Just how many of you got?

Oh one or two?

I've been counting.

They move around so fast, I can't be sure, but I estimate the number.

At thirty eight.

That right, If you say so.

Thirty eight it is, then they cost ten thousand apiece.

I'll assess them at five.

That's let's see, that's one hundred and ninety thousand dollars.

Oh no, hey, that's pretty steep.

But I'm going easy on you.

By rights, I should only allow you a third for depreciation.

Well that's it, mister night.

One hundred and ninety thousand dollars.

Wait, we'll send you the bill with your quarterly statement.

But good day, good day.

Ah.

But look, I've been holding off until we got the new landscaping job under control.

But I can't hold off any longer.

Any longer.

I mean, we got to start selling some of the robots.

Selling, Yeah, twenty of them.

That should do for a start.

The tax assessor was here, I need the cash.

You can't sell the robots.

Why can I?

Because they're my family, my boys named.

After me, all of albert I'm sorry, but that's ridiculous.

They're all live balls.

You wouldn't sell your own children, would you.

All their names start with A, just like mine, Abe, Adelbert, Alfred, Adam, Aaron Anton acts all right, all right.

All right, don't go through the whole roll call.

I mean, the point is I need the money.

Don't you worry, boss, I'll fix everything.

You have nothing to worry about.

The point is, mister Knight, the Internal Revenue Department is always interested when a citizen shows a substantial capital gain during the year capital gain.

I haven't made any capital come.

Come, sir.

I'm talking about the matter of some fifty two robots.

As I understand it, their retail value is ten thousand dollars each, so they say fifty two times ten thousand is five hundred and twenty thousand dollars.

On capital gains, you pay fifty percent or two hundred and sixty thousand dollars, a tax roughly of one hundred and thirty thousand dollars.

When what do I do?

By the fifteenth of next month, you must file a declaration of estimated income.

You paid half of the due tax at that time and the balance in monthly installments.

And there's one other matter.

On another matter we investigated, we found you make ten thousand dollars a year.

Would you tell me out of personal curiosity?

Understand I understand just how a man of your particular means could show a capital gain of a half a million.

Dollars in so short a time.

I'm beginning to wonder myself.

Well, our only concern is you pay your tax.

However, some other branch of the federal government might very well want to ask some questions.

Sometimes I were you, mister Knight, I would be ready with some answers.

Yeah, good day, Good.

Day, Alvid.

Now look did I tell you this is this is a crisis.

Do you understand it?

Like it or not.

I have got to sell some of your boys, a whole bunch.

Of them, Boss.

I told you not to worry, not to worry.

Listen, I just came from the income tax people.

I owe the government a cool one hundred and thirty grand and those boys.

Don't fool around.

I'm desperate.

Money is no trouble, boss.

Come here, Come where over here?

Look at this?

What's this?

What those are?

Those those bails?

What have they gotten?

Don't tell me full of money?

Boss, help yourself.

I mean that the actual real money in those bales.

Not stage money now, real.

Money, Boss, No ones, of course, but lots of tens and twenties.

Yeah, that bail over there is full of fifties.

We didn't fool around with ones, Albert, mean the eye did you?

Did you make that money?

You said you needed it.

We took some bills and analyzed the ink.

I found out how to weave the paper and made plates.

I hate the sounding modest, boss, but they're beautiful.

Oh my gosh.

I'm a counterfeitter too.

We just ran off as much as we thought you need.

If it's not enough, we'll make some.

It's enough, not not another dollar, Albert, listen to me that they're there are laws in this country.

I mean, you just can't go out and print money.

That's a crime, don't you understand.

Now, Look you take it all outside and burn it right up.

You understand, and don't print anymore.

That is an order.

I'm busy.

I hate to disturb you there, but I thought you ought to know about the sheriff.

I don't want to know the sheriff.

He was here with a subpoena whatever you call them.

What you call it seems the how to company's got to sue us.

Oh no, oh, all right, that does it?

That does Where are you going to see my lawyer?

He off hand man, I'd say you were in quite a jam.

I didn't have to walk all the way over here to find that out.

The point is, Lee, what in the name of heaven can I do?

Well, First, you'll have to file a declaration of estimated income.

Even if I can't pay, especially if you can't pay technically, then you haven't violated the law.

And all they can do is to try to collect what you owe.

They'll probably slap an attachment on your bank account.

What bank account?

I'm broke?

Oh well, then i'd say you're made to worry?

Is the how to company suit?

If I were you, i'd set it out a court.

Out of court, they might call off the action if you returned.

All the robots, Albert says, he'll testify that I made him.

Albert can't testify as a robot.

He has no standing in court.

Oh, you better give them back and get what terms you can't.

No, no, no, no, I won't do it.

I won't.

Don't you See.

They don't want Albert back because they can use him.

They want to break him up to maintain their robot prices.

Don't you see it might be a thousand years before his principle is rediscovered.

If it ever is, would that be bad?

I don't know.

Only time will tell that.

But I mean you could say the same thing about any great invention.

Look, no, I will not let them destroy Albert.

Yes, I see your point, Night, and I like it.

You like it, I'll take the case.

Of course.

I ought to warn you I'm not a very good lawyer.

I know I don't work hard enough at it.

But I do have a chance.

Huh.

In all my practice at law Night, I never saw a man who'd gotten himself as fouled up as this.

I'd say, your chances are nil.

Yeah it's Albert.

Boss.

I heard about the suit.

Yeah it's all right, Albert.

Mister Lee here is going to handle our case.

We robots want to help.

I'm afraid there's not much you can do.

Oh, yes there is.

I'm building a lawyer robot.

He's building a lawyer robot with.

Far greater memory capacity than any human, and with brain computers that operate on logic.

That's what law is based on, isn't it logic?

I've heard, but it won't work, Albert the practice law, you must be admitted to the bar.

To be admitted to the bar, you must have a degree in law and pass an examination.

And although it has never been an occasion to establish a precedent, I suspect the applicant must be human.

Lee Lee, Wait a minute, what about law clerks?

I mean they don't have to be human.

I'd say that was completely true.

Yeah, then Albert's robots can be clerks.

Well, could be you know what I mean.

Yes, it's never been done, but there's nothing in the law that says it can't be done.

Then it's settled.

I'll make a dozen to start.

Each one will be an expert in one phase of the law.

Boss, You're going to have the most powerful battery of legal talent ever assembled under one roof.

Right in the court, Mister Lee, what is the meaning of this outrage?

What outrage?

Your honor?

Those robots sitting at the defense table, These, your honor, are my valued assistants.

Robots.

Yes, your honor, take them away.

They have no standing in this.

Court, If your honor will excuse me, they need no standing.

I am the sole representative of the defendants, My client as a poor man, and he is opposed by the most formidable array of legal talent money can buy.

Now, surely the court will not deny him whatever assistance he's been able to muster.

This, Sir, is highly irregular.

If it please your honor.

I should like to point out that we live in a mechanized age.

The court clerk uses a machine to take down the transcript of these very proceedings.

To my certain knowledge, no court has ever challenged the presence of.

Such a device as an ad to the furtherance of justice.

If your honor can point out anything in the law specifically barring these robots from the court.

That's ridiculous, Sir.

Of course, there is no such provision.

At no time anywhere did anyone dream such a contingency would arise in that.

Case, Sir, I asked the court for a favorable ruling.

Mister, as you point out, there is no precedent for my ruling in any way but in your favor.

Therefore, Sir, with reluctance, I do so.

At this time, and what kind of a day has it been.

It's a day in which a new kind of trial has suddenly captured the imagination of the public.

A trial in which a man accused of.

Misappropriating a robot has brought into court a whole battery of robots to aid in his defense.

To give validity to their argument you're on earth, it must first be proved that these robots are in fact the property of the plaintiff.

That is the issue at trial in this case.

So, in the now famous robot case, the issue has come down to this, was the robot stolen or was he liberated?

It is a far reaching question.

Indeed, I have already established that robots are possessed of free will, that they have the power of reasoning, and that they can most certainly reproduce.

As to my worthy opponent's fourth contention that they have no spiritual sense, I contend that this is irrelevant.

There are agnostics and atheists in the.

Human race, and in general no one has denied them their full rights.

On this count.

And so the trial has at last come to its end.

The whole nation, indeed the whole world, awaits the momentous decision which must be handed down.

In Washington, d C.

Treasury officials have been meeting steadily for a week to find some way to avoid the loss of the enormous taxes on robots in the event the decision rendered is in favor of the defense.

One high government official has said that if robots are declared free and equal, it means they must be given full citizen rights under the constitution.

Already, the chairman of both major political parties are mapping campaigns to another robot Bote.

Welcome home, Darling.

Yeah, yeah, thank you for what's going on here, Grace.

I have more trouble getting into my own home than into the Pentagon.

Oh you mean the robots.

They've set up a defense perimeter.

I a defense Albert, Hello, Boss, welcome home, Albert.

What is the meaning of all of bob Weire and the rocket launchers?

Just precautions, Boss.

We're ready for any situation such as, oh, like a mob deciding to take justice into its own hands, for instance, or if the decision goes against us, that too, Boss.

Did you two go on and talk?

I really got to get back to my painting.

I have a beautiful still life light simply.

Got yeah, yeah, I finished, Albert.

Listen, you can't fight the whole world.

We won't go back how two kits incorporated.

We'll never lay a hand on me or any of my children.

That this is madness.

Don't you understand they'd get you with one bomb and me too.

Better to die fighting, Boss than to live in chains.

That's our motel.

No matter what happens, we are ready for the decision.

The court is ready to render its decision.

It is the most difficult decision I have ever made, for in following the letter of the law, I fear I may be subverting its spirit.

After long days of earnest consideration about the law and the evidence as presented in this court, I find for the defendant, Gordon Knight, I.

Cannot rule otherwise.

May I add that this ruling.

In spite of the fact that I myself made it, outrages my social conscience.

You did it, Boss, you did it.

We're free, Yes, Albert, we should did it.

Where's my wife in the studio painting?

Not another landscape?

Her fifth this week.

She's doing very well, yes, isn't she?

And I am working on a new robot for her a painter.

Soon she won't have to bother doing it herself.

That's nice.

And you won't have to do anything anymore either, Boss, not a thing.

Oh, we're gonna take care of you from here on out.

Thanks.

Did I tell you about my new children yet?

No?

I don't think so.

Alice, Angeline, Agnes, Agatha, Alberta and Abigail daughter six on the Boss, and all with a built in reproducing instinct just like mine.

Oh no, they're down in the basement now turning out robots.

Great, we've got everything worked out for your boss.

You won't have to worry about a thing for the rest of your life.

No, Albert, not a thing.

You have just heard.

X minus one presented by the National Broadcasting Company in cooperation with Galaxy Science fiction magazine, which this month features Name Your Symptom by Jim Harmon, a story of a future in which anyone who shunned the cure needed to have his head examined, assuming he still had one left.

Galaxy Magazine on your news stand today Tonight by transcription.

X minus one has brought you how to a story from the pages of Galaxy, written by Clifford D.

Simmack and adapted for radio by William Welch.

Featured in the cast were Alan Buntz, Anne seymour Les Damon, Joseph Bell, James Monks, William Key, laws In Zerbe Santa.

Sortega and Ben Grower.

Your Announcer Fred Collins.

X Minus one was directed by Daniel Sutter and is an NBC Radio Network production.

Muh here Politics and Primaries Dateline Illinois and Wisconsin tonight on NBC Radio.

Mm hmm