Hello you guys, Welcome back to another episode of the Hawkgirl Energy Podcast.

I'm your host, Kayleie, and this is your weekly reminder that it's a new day, a new week, a new mindset, and another day if you'd become the hawk Girl energy you want to attract.

Hello you guys, welcome back to another episode.

I have a bit of a different episode for today.

Typically I don't usually have Zuck up on the podcast, but Zach and I are celebrating our first wedding anniversary this week, and I thought it would be a fun episode to just kind of talk about some questions that you guys have asked on my Instagram story for things just in terms of like some wedding regrets that we may have had, things about just the wedding in general, along with a couple q and as, so we have a lot of questions year that I thought we could just kind of go through and just answer anything you guys have submitted in.

But we were just talking about Zach being on the podcast, and I just don't remember the last time he was on an episode.

I think it's been close to a year.

I think it was around the wedding last year.

Yeah, I think you're right.

I think the last time we recorded an episode together was the recap of the wedding of just like everything that happened after the honeymoon.

Did I even do that?

I don't even remember if I did that or not.

Yeah, either that or talking.

I don't think we talked before.

I think you're too stressed to talk before.

I think it was an after thing.

Yeah, I think you're right.

Yeah, I feel like we didn't have time to record an episode before the wedding.

I know.

Actually that's a lie, That is a lie.

Remember we did a wedding everything about the wedding, and I posted it on the wedding week.

I did it two parts.

Yeah, that we recorded beforehand.

Yes, so never mind, we did do that.

So on shocks, we actually did that.

I think we must have done that a week in advanced or something like that.

And there was no way we did while we were in Italy.

No, oh no, no, no.

I wouldn't have brought my MIC with me, that's for sure.

I never bring my MIC with me when I travel, just because I find it always somehow gets damaged.

When the last time I brought it, Oh, I left it plugged in in the sense of what you left.

The bottom plugged in and that's why it broke.

Oh, I see, Okay, Well, anyways, this is why I don't travel with a mic.

We're gonna just jump right into the questions because we have a lot of questions here, and I know we're gonna probably explain in depth of like each question that comes in, we'll probably just yap away.

Well I'm the yapper, I'm the yappers.

So anyways, we're gonna get down to the questions here.

It's insane how many questions or followers have.

I know, submitted.

I know, it's it's insane.

The community is so supportive, Like like I had to do a screen recording on the story and I'm just like scrolling through all the questions.

We're gonna try and answer as many as we can because like there is a lot here, but there is some that might be repetitive as well, so we're gonna try our best just to yeah, try and be yeah on top of this.

All right, we had a few questions about how we found certain things for our wedding.

So if you're new here, Zach and I got married in Italy this time last year.

We're from Canada, so it was a destination wedding.

We did hire a wedding planner that was based in Italy that basically organized everything for us, which I highly recommend doing if you do plan to do a destination wedding, because it's very difficult to find vendors and all that, especially in a destination that you're not familiar with or be in anywhere close proximity to time zone everything, or you don't speak the language or you don't speak the language.

Yeah, Like having the planner I think helped us with a lot of like just like getting the best possible rates for like the florals and like just renting like chairs.

Welle, the incredible contacts.

They knew which companies you go for, which came to stay away from, who provided service in that area, who didn't.

It was they were very knowledgeable but the area.

Yeah, so it kind of builds off one question, which was logistics of planning.

She's a girl that's considering to do an Italy venue but just doesn't know how to go about it.

So I think, honestly the best thing to do is to do some research on honestly Instagram and TikTok and just seeing what other people have used for planners.

We used Rosini Weddings.

You can actually find a lot of the vendors that we worked with on our wedding picture, which is actually pinned on my Instagram and you'll see, like the photographer, we use the venue that we got married at, along with planners and all that.

But that's kind of how I found Rosini was I kind of was just like creeping through Instagram and I came across their Instagram account and I reached out to them and yeah, we just kind of like set up a meeting and it turned out really good.

But there we had several meetings.

Yes, oh I met with multiple No, I didn't just meet with that.

No, don't like, So, don't be don't jump to the first planner because the first Italy planning you find.

Don't be afraid to interview multiple planners because you have to ca with them, yes, and you have to feel like they're going to execute what you.

Want one hundred percent.

That's a good point.

We definitely met with a lot of other planners before we went with Rosini.

A lot of the planners that we met with were either a one person team or you know, two people in a team.

But Rosini had about like four to five people on their planning team, and we just kind of felt more secure with that knowing that there was multiple people that would be taking on different responsibilities for the planning of the wedding days.

So highly recommend doing your research and don't just stick to one, you know, talk to multiple and then you can kind of get a feel of their vibe and what kind of suits your preference and like what you think, I don't know, just kind of suits you the best.

Someone asks how I found my hair and makeup?

Again, literally through Instagram, just scrolling through you know, other photographers that were based in Italy or you know planners.

A lot of them actually have the vendors tagged in it, and they had a few hair and makeup options based in on Mafi Coast and that's kind of the one that we decided to go with.

And I did a hair and makeup trial when I went to go visit the venue back in May, which was a few months before the wedding.

Did you tour your wedding venue before you booked it?

So no, no, Well we did go look at wedding venues, which was helpful.

We looked at like fifteen.

We looked at a lot.

So we did technically go down and book the trip and go see the wedding venues, which I highly recommend doing because I think it helped us like narrow it down to what we wanted, because I think we would have just booked some of the ones that we went to and then we saw it in person and we're like, oh, I'm happy we didn't book this.

And there was stuff that the venues didn't disclose.

Yes, which huge.

That's a huge thing when you're booking your venue.

There's going to be so many things that you don't even think about, like noise with regulations.

I guess they stop music at a certain point outside how many people you can actually fit in the space.

Like there were some venues that were actually like smaller, like they couldn't accommodate that many people, and just like random things that you don't really think about.

Yeah, Like there was one it was said we could have one hundred people at the wedding, which is crazy to go over there one hundred people, but I said, you could have one hundred people at the wedding, but for the ceremony it was only twenty.

And it was like well, that's kind of a weird thing.

It was just because the lawn real they wanted the ceremony to be held can only fit so many people.

So yeah, I just know that there's a lot of things to look out for and make sure to communicate all the points that you can with your wedding planner along with the venue and just make sure that it aligns with you.

Because there was a lot of Lake Como for an example.

Yeah, when you're at La Como U the smaller towns around the lake, they had more regulations at place because it's not such a touristy spot as it is the locals that live there.

So I didn't want huge noise, like they didn't want really a loud noise late at night.

Everything had to be more tamed and indoors.

Yeah, it was very interesting.

I think there was only two or three wedding venues in Lake Como that we went to that actually had like the noise maps at like eleven pm or midnight, like all the more eight pm or nine pm, which is crazy to me that you have to keep it quiet.

By that point said, some of these.

Rules were new, but I'm not really too sure.

Anyways, the point is, just make sure to ask all the questions, because it's important when you're putting your money down on a wedding venue that it meets all your requirements.

Someone said, I'm having my wedding in October in Italy.

Anything last minute advice or tips that you recommend.

I think, pack as far in advance as you can.

I personally feel like for us, we packed really far in advance in terms of just like little the things that we needed, like our robes that we got customized that we brought down.

You know, all the brides made outfits, All the brides made like little details that I did, like their imass and all that.

Like, there's so much that we had to pack to bring down, So I'm really happy that I really organized everything, including my honeymoon outfits.

Everything, Like, think about how much we packed.

Do not be afraid to bring or buy your bag?

Yes, oh my gosh, yes we brought.

Did we bring an extra suitcase?

But yeah, yeah, yeah we did.

We brought extra suitcase with stuff just for the wedding week for rehearsal, dinner, the events before the wedding close for that outfits, and then we brought that all in a smaller bag, and then when we were over there after the wedding, we transferred all my stuff out of the larger bag into the smaller bag because I still had a suit and other stuff in that big bag, And we actually ended up taking a bunch of the signage.

What else do we take?

We took a bunch of stuff from the menus on the plates, our vow books.

Yeah, there's a lot of stuff.

There's a lot of stuff that we took back from the wedding, and we set that bag back with my parents.

Including zach suit and my wedding dress.

That way, we didn't have it for the honeymoon.

So honestly, pay to have the extra bag if you're over there, or buy one when down there.

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, one hundred percent.

I do think that's yeah, really needed, especially since you are doing your wedding in Italy.

Yes, this I felt like was such a like it made me feel less stressed knowing that we had the air tag in it, and it just like we were able to track it wherever it was.

Keeping constant communication with your planner I think was good.

Like we had text chats, we were able to constantly text them.

They were kind of good at like reminding us what we had to bring or what they had or what we're still waiting for.

So I feel like that was super helpful instead of communicating through email, was just being able to text each other just about you know, last minute things.

So if you don't have a text setup with your planners, you can use an app called WhatsApp, so you don't have to worry about you know, destination texting or anything.

Oh, do not your if your wedding is October, you're probably okay to still try and get some stuff wrapped up.

Don't wait until a week before to finalize your signage.

Your men used your Yeah, we did have that issue.

Well, we didn't wait a week before.

The issue was is that it got shipped to the wrong.

Or no, it got shipped to the planners.

It got shipped to the plan they got held.

X yes, and then FedEx decided to keep it and not like attempt to deliver it again.

So then the planners had to well we had to pay for a new train for them to come basically and they had to go pick it up.

If you're getting anything shipped to your venue, your planner get it done well before two days before or.

Pay for express, like do something, because yeah, we were pretty stressed.

I don't know what happened there though it is still to this date.

We ordered late, I think really for in advance.

The girl was in England and I guess there was just an issue.

I don't really remember.

I didn't order it that list, I can remember.

I just remember being on the phone driving to Rebella.

Oh, it was so stressful.

That was probably the most stressful thing we had throughout the wedding.

Everything else was fine.

That was the only thing.

It somehow made it.

So that's all I care about because it did actually make a huge difference in the visual aspect.

So I'm really happy that it ended up all coming in.

But I think that's probably the best advice.

I mean, October, Yeah, October is going to be the perfect month because it's not going to be too hot.

We unfortunately had a very hot wedding day.

I was sweating my freaking ass off, like literally.

Oh anyways, I don't regret it at all.

In terms of like wearing my hair down.

I'm really happy that I did that because I personally feel the most confident with my hair down, especially for pictures and such, so I felt like if I put my hair up in a slick back, butun I think I would have regretted it just because it's not my favorite hairstyle on myself.

I love a high ponytail, but you can't rock a pony with the veil, Like, it just wasn't happening.

So I'm happy that I went with that decision because I'm really happy with how the photos turned out, especially with my dress.

But pack an Amazon fan, Like, if you are doing a wedding in the summer, either in Italy or wherever, or somewhere that's going to be really hot, you can literally get those cheap mini fans from Amazon.

And my two mative honors had a fan on me.

I think you had a fan on me at one point, Like we were constantly just fanning me, just because I had obviously a really heavy dress on.

But yeah, those are some tips that we would recommend for your wedding.

What was the most memorable thing of the entire experience?

What would you say your favorite part was.

I guess maybe from the start of the wedding planning to the actual wedding day.

Is it bad?

My favorite?

Is it actually the wedding day oh what is it ABNB.

Oh okay, well that's TECTI for the wedding, but.

It was something we planned afterwards, like com clearly afterwards on our own.

Yeah, that's true.

So we did a whole wedding event where it was multiple days instead of just like the wedding day.

We did a welcome party, a rehearsal dinner, and then the wedding day.

So Zach's referring to the welcome party.

We got this beautiful airbnb in Ravello that literally overlooked the mountains.

It was the most insane ARABNBA I think I've ever heard.

Yeah, a big rooftop patio, big courtyard patio.

Yeah, slept I think twenty three.

Twenty maybe, Yeah, it was big except a lot of people.

Yeah, so wedding parties and friends.

And then like everyone else in the wedding, they had to find their own accommodation.

Yeah, which was fine because Revella was a really small town, which is why we kind of went that direction.

I know some of you guys actually asked how we dealt with accommodations and such, and we ended up booking the airbnb for the bridesmaids and the parents.

But everyone else.

We got them to find their own accommodation.

So yeah, because it was a small town, it was very easy for people to find things in like walking distance, no issues in terms of getting to the wedding venue and anything, which we obviously were really grateful for.

I think we probably gave some guidance in terms of like, hey, try and book near this vicinity.

That way, people knew that they weren't like having to take a taxi over to Ravello just because Ravelo is a really small town up in the mountains.

But anyways, this airbnb insane and we actually decided pretty last minute to hire a DJ for this airbnb terrorist, which then we started to get stressed because we found out that the town I guess had strict music policies for like where we were.

Yeah, kind of we read something about oh, no noise up to this time, blah blah blah.

And this was while after we booked.

The djone someone was like, oh, the neighbors are pretty strict.

Yeah, the hosts of the neighbors are pretty strict.

And then DJ showed up and he happened to be from the town, so we were like, hey, well, thankfully your mom also speaks Italian, so it's super easy.

Your mom went over, explained the situation.

The neighbor walked over and goes, I know everybody, I know everybody Rebella, We're fine, don't worry about it.

And he just played all night.

Yeah, so my mom's for the Italian, So for her, she was able to kind of like communicate and just make sure that you know, we weren't disrespecting anyone in terms of like the music being too loud or anything.

The DJ was better than our wedding dj.

Like, he was incredible.

We were so shocked how good he was.

Like, I don't know, I think we just requests.

I think we just literally asked our planner, It's like, oh, what do you recommend for a DJ?

And Ravello and they recommended this guy and he was so fun.

He played all the music that we would love.

Yeah, he was really good.

I don't know.

I think that was just like the best way to kick off the start to the wedding weekend for sure.

I think for me, obviously the wedding day I think was my favorite.

But I loved doing our first look and our vows.

That truly was the most memorable part for me.

That I think being with everybody that was probably the best part, Like being with all the guests and the bridesmaids and all that.

I would say that night was the best by far.

I agree with that, But I think like between, like the moment between you and I think that was like my favorite part of the entire experience, was just being able to have that moment of seeing you in your suit for the first time and you seeing me in my dress and having just like pouring out our feelings and I don't know, obviously we have a lot of history, so being able to have that moment of just like spilling everything was just truly the most amazing moment and that was probably my fart of my favorite moment.

How did you handle the stress of spending money?

I think what's important is to save before you decided to start planning wedding, because I don't think I would have executed the wedding had I not had any Like if I had no savings in my account, I definitely wouldn't have done the wedding, you know what I mean, Like you need to create the start of something for the wedding.

That way you can go into it feeling a little bit stressed.

I mean, obviously, regardless, it's stressful, like you're spending a lot of money.

It is what it is.

But I think if, like you know that you saved all this money for this moment, that it feels a little less stressful knowing that.

Leng Yeah, but it didn't matter how much money we had saved, it just kept getting more and more.

Yeah for you, Yeah, because you see the money coming out of the account and you're like, oh god, that's a lot.

Well, and our budget might have changed a couple of times.

Yeah, the budget did change a few times.

To be fully transparent, we're not going to disclose what we spent just because I think that's a very personal question.

I know some of you guys actually asked that.

I think if you are currently planning a wedding, I'm sure you get an understanding of what venues typically cost along with some blates, and it's just it's not cheap.

It's it's very very expensive.

And as Zach said, of course our budget changed a few times, but I still think we've still kept it in a pretty appropriate amount from what it's actually gonna be.

Like, it was not appropriate.

He's not happy with it, but do you regret anything exactly?

I don't exactly, So you say that, but yeah, no, it definitely was.

Yeah, I don't regret anything.

Don't go.

Don't go above your means.

Yeah, don't go.

It's like buying a house.

You don't want to end up house poor.

You don't end up mortgage poor.

You don't want to end up wedding for you don't want to save all this money for you know, for us it was three days plus a plus a three week trip after all this stuff, right, but you don't want to spend money on realistic one day.

Yeah, and it affect the next three years of your life because you went above and beyond what you could afford.

Yeah.

So, actually there was one thing that we had to cut out of our wedding budget that I really wanted, but financially it just didn't make sense to do so.

But essentially, Zach and I did this white runway on the grass that you know, what would you call it the wedding aisle there with the floral arrangements and all that, And our wedding venue was on grass.

So in order to have that like flat white surface for the wedding aisle, we were gonna have to pay.

I think it was like twenty thousand dollars euro?

Was it euro?

It was a euro?

Okay, it was twenty thousand euro, which.

Is what's wild for a platform.

For a platform, because they would have had to customize it and they would have had to bring it up in Revello with with trucks and everything.

That just would have cost so much money.

So I'm like, there's no freaking way I'm paying that kind of money for a wedding aisle essentially, So then we decided to just do the white rug, and I think it it still turned out great in the photos.

I just I think in terms of a regret, I didn't like how like it kind of looked a little like wonky when people stepped a little bit, you know what I mean.

That was the only thing that I didn't love about that.

But I don't regret doing it because I personally didn't love the grass because I remember when we saw the grass, the grass was also kind of semi dead, so it kind of would have looked like you know what I mean, yeah, the other day once they have.

So anyways, I'm still happy we did the white runner.

I just think like, obviously, if I had the budget to pay that much.

I would have, but I didn't, so I don't regret it.

If you guys hear Freddy breathing or licking or whatever, I'm sorry.

We're trying so hard to record this episode right now, and I'm sure if you're a dog owner you probably get it.

Yeah, that's definitely people can hear him doing that.

I love this question.

How did you stay present during the big day?

I think one thing that Zach and I talked about the entire like, well not the the first few days leading up to the wedding.

I think the first thing that we said to each other was let's try and make this day about us, not about our guests.

Like we kept telling each other that, like we really wanted to be like obviously present in the moment, but like remember what we kept saying, We're like, of course, like our guests were a huge priority.

But I think because we had the two events leading up to the wedding, and.

Because it was a smaller wedding people it's easier to talk to everybody before the wedding.

Yes, with the two events, but it was people who are directly people who we see all the time, immediate family, there was no, oh, you're my mom's third cousin, twice removed like yeah, this is what I'm doing for work now, and then not knowing who you are on your wedding day.

Everyone that was invited to our wedding was people that we would talk to within like a few weeks, a few months.

Like it was people that we had you know, continuous communication with.

But having the two events, like with the welcome dinner and the rehearsal dinner, like we were spending time with everybody.

I wouldn't really say we were like spending too much time you I like we were trying, but the wedding day specifically, because we dedicated the two other days of trying to like you know, socialized everybody connect.

I feel like the wedding day we were fully just like make sure this is about us.

And so I think we kind of like made that clear to people too that we wanted to be you know, we want to be alone.

But like that we were very much like there for each other in a sense, you know what I mean.

Were you both involved in the decision making or was it mainly you?

We were very both involved.

I would say I definitely didn't make the decisions without Zach's approval.

I think I kind of just said, hey, this is what I'm thinking.

Are you okay with that?

Are you not okay with that?

I think this is how we do everything though, because you have a vision and then I'm the realistic one and I got to kind of crush your vision sometimes and bring it backyard.

Yeah.

I guess a situation that's very relevant right now is our backyard.

I have a vision.

Zach was basically able to execute it in the sense of, like you know, kind of building it, bringing it to life.

So when you think about the wedding, I have a vision, but Zach kind of talks about the logistics and the money and the costs associated to doing those things, and he's like, okay, realistically, like we could do this floral arrangement, but I don't think we should be doing this floral arrangement that you really want.

Like, let's think of you know what I mean, the legit.

Yeah, because you would say all these are the flowers I want completely, and then you would you would isolate, right.

I think it's important that both parties involved in, you know, making decisions on the wedding, because it's not just I guess it's it's your wedding day, but we're both involved.

It's money that we are both spending on this.

Yeah, and you know the floral arrangement.

Like you, you you get your mind fixed on which is great.

You have a specific detail for one thing, but you're like, okay, here's option one through five for the flowers.

I like option to the best.

This is the best one.

This one looks most beautiful.

And then you flip your mind over to the next day.

You get something for the drapery and you're like, okay, well I like drapery option number one, and it's also the most expensive.

And then you look at the table setting like this.

He goes, okay, well, we can't keep picking the most expensive thing.

Yes, obviously we're going with the most expensive thing, but now we need to pick.

Would you rather the flowers be a wow, the drapery to be okay, that's nice, and the table setting and the average or do you want all three of them to be like wow, that's nice?

Or do you want to blow your budget and go way over and then be wedding poor and have everything back?

Oh my god, yeah, I think yeah.

To build off Sack's point, I think no matter what, it's a team effort, and I think I had the vision.

Zach had the brains behind how can we execute the vision but within the budget?

Right, So he was kind of like the finance guy along with Okay, let's rank this stuff that we're getting right, like as you said, like, okay, is the floral arrangement the most important?

Is the drapery the most important?

And then we kind of allocated, Okay, well, let's put more money towards the flowers and less money towards the drapes.

It's good to work as a team, one person of the vision, one person know how to execute that vision or try to get the best vision for the best price, and try and negotiate things and go back to the a new Kala specific vision.

So it was very important for me to hammer home to the planners that hey, look, this is what we want, but this is our price.

This is where we have to get everything under here, and it's very important to work with your planners at the same time.

Yeah, and then the planners will most likely like offer two different options or three different options, and then you and I kind of like work with It.

Would be also very easy for a planner to take advantage of one person if it was just one person making a decision.

But we were making all the spreadsheets like you were doing out all that.

So that was really helpful because I do not like doing that kind of stuff, So that was really helpful.

What was something that you did to help ease any stress?

Anything?

Very simple?

Okay, here's one example.

I had one thing that I thought I was going to be stressed about.

But I don't know if this is a good thing or not.

But in order for me to like eliminate that stress, I personally just like didn't even think about it.

So the weather Oh yeah, I literally didn't look at the weather appitt all.

I made it.

I literally made it a priority to not look at the weather app because I knew it was going to stress me out, and I wanted with the intention of that whether it rains or it's the most you know, beautiful day ever, it's going to be the best day ever, regardless.

So I kind of like went with that mindset that it didn't you know, it didn't matter at the end of the day.

I personally felt like if I was constantly checking the weather app, that was going to create more stress for me, and I just didn't want to have to think about that one component that was going to bother me, you know what I mean.

So I kind of avoided it.

And I don't know if that's something like to recommend or all, but like it.

It did end up being a beautiful day, and I think I had three people come up to me saying that it technically was supposed to rain that day and it didn't, so.

I kind of forgot about that.

Yeah, yeah, stressed without the weather.

I really I was thinking more about like the day of stuff and leading up, like, right, you didn't you didn't know about the signage all that stuff not being in the mail until it got down to the tenth hour.

I'm like, Hi, by the way, I'm paying for a train ticket for them to go this stuff.

Yeah, because so AKA the husband kind of deal with there.

And then I'm thankful.

I had some really good groomsmen and my best man.

They were great.

The bridesmaids as well, but like the groomsmen and best man, they were very much like anything you need delegate to us, and I think it's I.

Think at one point the planners like we also, like the my maid of honors stepped up in terms of like they said to the planners, like if there's anything that seems stressful, tell us, not the bride, like are my maid of honors?

Kind of stepped up in that sense where you know, they would go handle a situation without me even knowing.

If I'm getting my makeup done and something was happening, you know with the way things were going on the venue, they would get out of the room and they would deal with it that way.

I didn't have to think twice about it, right.

So I think delegation, Yeah, delegation was huge, and I think it pays off the way it's some really good people on our wedding party who knew enough to you know, come to me and say what can I do?

Even the bridesmaids were comany, hey what can I do?

Take you off Kayley's place?

What can I do to help ease her stress?

And it made a very yeah that our wedding party really wanted to help out.

It wasn't even like us asking like some of them like as you said, like they would straight up just ask us saying like hey, what can I do?

Like I want to do something.

I don't want to just sit here like I want to be able to help any way that I can, which was, yeah, made it less stressful, obviously knowing that they were willing to do that.

Okay, this next question was, I'm a month post wedding.

Any tips for not falling into the post wedding depression?

That's a questioned because I feel like you fell right in.

I fell right into it.

I'm not gonna lie.

I was so sad after the honeymoon for like a month.

I think the best thing that kept me, you know, I guess happy moving on to the next like trying to think of like the next thing, right, and not feeling that depression.

Of course, I definitely was really sad for a month, as I said, was really emotional, just because it literally was the best month of my entire life.

That and because you put so much effort into much.

Effort, so much energy for yeah, as you said, like for fourteen months, like it literally that's all I would think about, right, And then right after the wedding Day's over and the honeymoon's over, It's like, now, what, like all my energy has just disappeared, right in terms of like what I'm putting the effort towards.

I personally think just kind of honestly keeping yourself busy, like doing things like just to kind of get your mind off of it a little bit, and then over time, I do think it just kind of eventually goes away.

Like of course I look back at our photos and I'm like, oh, that was the best day ever.

But I don't think of like, oh my god, like I have nothing to do now, like I have nothing to prepare for.

I think it's more so like think about the next exciting part of your life, Like there's so many other things to look forward to, like starting a family with your husband, or buying another house, or you know, there's always another step that's going to be happening.

Maybe it's getting a new job or a new career, like promotion at work at work, or you know, for me, I was really excited about coming back and like, you know, really putting my energy towards work again and like getting back into the podcast, and you know, looking at starting my brand.

Like there were so many other things that I could put my mind and energy towards, which kind of helped.

So having that distraction of knowing that there's more things to come that are going to be really exciting in the next chapter and in your life, I think made it easier to kind of get through it.

And obviously now we're a year out and I don't have the depression anymore.

But I think, honestly, everybody goes through wedding blues, and some people it might take them a week or two, some people might deal with it for a month, like it really just depends on the person.

But I truly do think that everybody goes through a little bit of a depression, especially when you plan it for so long.

One thing that I feel like I always did was I always tried to make our relationship a priority, but also like being able to still have fun with my friends and have the college experience along with, you know, obviously furthering my career of you know, going through schooling and being able to get a job after college and all that.

But I did get a scholarship in high school to go play in West Virginia Tech.

So it is a call in West Virginia, and I decided to turn it down because there was multiple factors.

I personally didn't want to play soccer at that high of a level anymore.

I kind of wanted to die down my sports once I got to college, I had friends that were also staying in Ottawa.

Like one of my best friends, she was going to Ottawa you and I don't know.

I kind of was like, you know, I would rather say, like where my friends are, which a lot of them were staying in Ottawa.

Another one of my good friends went to Carlton University and then I knew Zach was also staying.

So I don't know.

I kind of like made my decision on that.

And I will be fully transparent.

I am a homebody, Like I didn't ever want to like move to another city and I still don't to this day.

Like I really do love being near my family and friends.

So I feel like that kind of helped our relationship a lot is knowing that neither of us were moving away.

But as I said, like we both are very driven individuals, so it was nice because like, of course, like we made our relationship our priority, but we both like respected that we wanted to focus on our careers and our school.

And I don't know, I just feel like nothing really, I would say, obviously things change, but in a good way.

I agree.

I think get the nail on the head.

There was a little bit of a not even a growing curve.

But it was just you know me and you met new friends through college.

I met new friends through work.

It was just a different adaptation to our lives and it was more about us being open with what you know, new people, your experiences, that kind of stuff.

I felt like I was hanging a lot with like your new friends.

You were hanging a lot with my new friends.

I think we both were always like willing to try different things for each other, which again is very important.

You need to be able to allow each other to like adapt into your lifestyle or into your lives with you know, the people you care about, the people that you want to introduce each other to.

All that.

So I think that answers the question in terms of like that.

So yeah, another couple question is how did you know your partner was the one?

I go back and forth all the time with my BF of three years.

I knew answer.

We're just staring at you.

Was gonna say, I I'll go first.

You always go first, Okay, so then you yeah, because I'm worried I'm not gonna match your better than mine?

Sorry, what is it?

How did you know they were the one?

How did you know I was the one that.

How did I know you were the one?

Kelly?

You just one day I just looked at you from across the kitchen and it just hit me and I just I just knew it was gonna be you.

No our our you know.

Open communication was very important for us about wants and you know, goals in our life and making sure your what you what you want the lines of your partner.

Kelly and I were both we've touched on it.

Both very work driven.

You know, we both wanted big things far as for our careers and for ourselves, and it aligned with each other.

You know.

We wanted to you know, same sized family, We wanted to live in the same area, didn't want to move by the city.

Yeah, it just seemed like everything just lined up for us.

And you know, I got along well with I get along well with her family, She gets along well with my family.

All these things just kind of worked and it, I don't know, it was accumulation of a lot of things, and then you know, just spending time with you, it felt felt natural, It felt right.

It felt like, Okay, this is you know, this is what I want for the rest of my life.

That's kind of how I was able to figure it out.

Yeah, I was.

My answer would be very similar to that.

I really like how we were very open and honest since the beginning of our relationship of what we wanted for our future, Like we both agreed that you know, oh, we both want two kids.

You know, as you said, we both see each other like growing up here in Ottawa.

I think it's important to communicate at an early stage in your relationship what your goals and aspirations are in life, because I think if they don't line, that makes it really difficult to be with someone that just doesn't have the same future as you.

And I think obviously that motivates you guys to continue the relationship.

But I think for Zach, for me personally, I don't know, there's something about his personality that just like really clicks well with me.

I think he's like my perfect He's my perfect partner in crime.

For sure.

Zach is always there for me in the sense where I just feel like he's always been like the best supportive partner and I just don't think anyone would would be able to tolerate me.

No, I just think like we just had the perfect pair.

I really don't know how to explain it, Like I don't know what I would do without him.

I truly don't.

Like he literally just always corrects me in the best way, or you know, whenever I'm trying to build up a point, like he's he knows exactly what I'm trying to say, so he's able to build me off.

Like You're just always like that person that I just know you're gonna be able to like be there for me and anything, like literally in anything, like not even like when I communicate, but just like sure, but even just like when we're playing sports, like you're always there to kind of just like okay, yeah, like do this, tweak this, You'll be good.

Like you're always trying to make me a better person, I guess in a way.

And I think that's like really good to have that in a partner, because if they're trying to make you better, I think that's so special.

I think they would based some of your answer.

So that concludes our episode for today.

We kind of just threw in a lot more wedding questions than a couple questions, just because I feel like a lot of the questions were more so wedding related, which I hope that kind of got the point across for people who might be planning a wedding, or are thinking about planning a wedding in Italy, or just who had questions about wedding planning in general.

But I still can't believe.

We're celebrating crazy.

That's literally crazy.

What are we doing for our one year?

We can tell them that act like, what are we doing for our one year?

We're going over dinner.

I haven't booked the restaurant.

Yet, but I'm going to wet.

It's Wednesday, and we don't have a reservation for Friday.

It's actually Tuesday, first off, but podcast comes out Wednesday.

Yeah, that's true, but I'll book it tomorrow when night, when.

The when the podcast is out, we should have a dinner reservation.

But it's also Ottawa's.

You don't need to have a reservation bunked two.

Weeks the day before.

Yeah, so I actually have a few places that I wanted to show you before, Ben, because we're gonna fall asleep here Zach's yawning.

So but anyways, Yeah, we definitely need to book a restaurant, and then what's the big thing we're doing.

I can't believe you didn't think about that we are watching our wedding video.

Finally, Yes, and we are we watching it.

We're gonna watch it in our brand new backyard with the projector.

Yes, Zach set up a projector outside in our backyard on the fence.

We have like this big actor screen and it's foldable so you can, you know, put it in a storage you know, or in the house.

Sorry.

And then we got a smart projector where it actually projects Netflix YouTube, I.

Thing, yeah, Prime Video, Yeah, I can.

You can download other apps so we can watch actual TV out there.

Yeah.

It connects to Wi Fi and anyways.

I'll link everything if people are interested in it.

But we're gonna watch our wedding video one night as well this weekend, which I think is gonna be so special because we have not seen it.

Everyone wants me to film the reaction of us seeing it for the Yeah, we're gonna ballze.

We're literally both just gonna sit there and ball perfect.

It's gonna be awesome.

It's not gonna be awesome.

I hate crying, but it will be.

It'll be nice.

So that's kind of how we're spending our weekend, super low key.

But a few days after that we'll be heading somewhere.

We booked something.

We're getting on a plane in how many days, like eighteen days we're gonna be on a plane.

Yeah, eighteen days.

We're gonna be somewhere.

So stay tuned on our instagram if you want to see us travel again to a very special place that we will not say.

But anyways, I love you guys.

Also much, thank you guys for listening to another episode.

If you guys are new, definitely make sure to follow at the hawkgirl Energy Instagram page.

You can also follow the host Kaylei, which is me.

I'm on Instagram, TikTok, and YouTube.

But I love you guys.

Also much, thank you guys for listening to this very special episode.

Zach, thank you for being here.

Thanks for having me and spending your Tuesday night recording this episode even though you're very tired from work.

But yeah, we're celebrating anniversary and yeah, excited to celebrate another hopefully sixty years with you.

Sixty years is that enough?

Yeah?

Eighty years.

It will be eight nine, Yeah, it will.

Be eighty nine, so maybe more.

But I pray that we have a long, healthy marriage.

So I love you, Love you guys, Thanks for listening,