Ridiculous crime.

It's a production of iHeartRadio.

And there you are here.

I am Elizabeth.

Look at me.

I've been over here waiting for you for three hours?

Have you at a three minutes?

I just walked in.

Felt a little bad.

I just walked in, Atio, So I got a question for you.

You're here, Yes, sir?

Do you know what's ridiculous?

I do?

Thank goodness, you do want to share with me?

Well.

Research indicates seventy nine percent of shoppers are drawn to themed products and sixty nine percent actively seek out limited edition formats.

Nice.

I'm telling you this because I have a mashup.

And before I get into it, you want to blame someone, Blame Simone Rodriguez.

Is that your other name?

No?

She goes by Scorpio Crochet on Instagram.

Very talented.

Oh yeah, okay.

She sent us a DM and said she'd never forwarded something as fast as this.

God and it had a picture on this sort of meme and a picture sure of this what I'm going to tell you about.

Underneath it it said toilet's gonna look like Chernobyl right after.

Oh God, buckle up, buttercup, I'm talking to you.

So have you ever watched that show Stranger.

Things the first season and I got bored.

Okay, I've never seen it, but it's got like a bald lady, bald little girl.

Yeah yeah, yeah, but I think they're all old people now, yeah, they're all.

Grown up totally.

They got to be going on for like eighteen years something like that.

It's been a longer than SVU anyway.

So they teamed up with Doritos.

And toilet company teamed up the.

Toilet Stranger Things.

Oh right, I'm so on the Chernobyl toilet.

Toilet, toilet Duck and Doritos are back together.

No toilet, Doritos and Stranger Things.

You know, I guess there's a new season coming out or they're a rest home.

It's got to be the last one, right, I would pray.

I've never seen it.

I just like making these cracks like I'm an insider.

So they have like old school looking bags of chips, like the old style Doritos, like the or whatever.

Yeah, so they're doing that.

But then they have something and apparently it looks to me like it's only in the UK, which is a bummer because I honestly would try this.

Maybe should travel there.

It's Dorito's black Garlic dip never had black garlic.

I have a friend who ferments garlic to make black garlic.

Of course you do, and yeah, of course you food.

It has a creamy texture, bold flavor profile, and charcoal black color.

It's you know, kind of for Halloween.

Also Rob Possier, he's the marketing director at to Rito's.

You can blame him.

He said, the black garlic dip is designed to elevate the snacking experience, perfectly pairing with our chips for memorable moments.

He sounds like's brother, you just think about your elevating your snacking experience.

You're just like going to town on a bag of Dorito's by yourself, light of television, sitting on the floor in your own filth, and you're like, this is a memorable moment.

This is I'm showing you a picture.

I'll have them put it on Instagram.

It doesn't so much look black.

It looks navy blue.

Qu construction product blue.

It changes hours, it doubles as it it's a new age polymer.

Yes, it would glue.

From amalgamated Dorito's brands.

It looks horrible.

It's so ridiculous.

The end it's two pounds fifty in the UK when it comes out, So all of my UK pals out there try it.

Let me know, I'll be envious because I would kind of like to try a black garlic dip.

Sure, what if it's like Tom, you.

Know I love you do Love Tomb, Yeah, so it could be equivalent, just.

So it's like black tomb.

Yeah, ridiculous.

Yeah, we'll go with that stamp and ridiculous.

You're welcome.

Well, you got a second cause I got some mony ridiculous for you.

I got all day.

Well, okay.

There have been a few escape artists that we've featured on this show, but I gotta say not since PCP Super Spy Guy, have we had such an epic chase, especially not one that devolves as many vehicles as this.

Oh yit.

He's on two wheels, he's on four wheels.

He's coming by land, he's coming by sea.

Because Elizabeth, he is this guy.

He tried like a hell to get away.

He was like, cowgun, take me away.

It's a whole caper of escapes and it's certified ridiculous.

This is Ridiculous Crime a podcast about absurd and outrageous capers.

Hest and cons it's always ninety nine percent murder free and one hundred percent ridiculous.

Oh oh oh, I'm gonna start howling all the time.

That's I'm gonna be.

Like a Howler.

There you go.

That's that would work, like Howler monkey, no tail.

So, Elizabeth, what do you know about New England?

It is a new version of Old England.

It's in the United States.

Yes, it's charming, upper right corner on the map.

Well, the state's there.

They're very different from what we have out west, like as you know, I spent some time there.

Yeah, and for a Californian like you or ostensibly me, it can be weird how small the states are.

Yeah, right, it's wild, Like you can be in Massachusetts and then pop over the border to Connecticut or Vermont just to buy your groceries, like that's just down the street is across the border.

Again, for someone from the West, like driving around it can feel wild, like we drive four hours and you won't even make it to La from San Francisco.

You go four hours east and you might be getting into Nevada.

Oh yeah, totally from here there, Yeah, but like four hours there across from four or five States.

I know all about to say, Elizabeth, please allow me to introduce you to life in small town Vermont, specifically Walcott, Vermont.

That's where our story begins.

That they make Ben and Jerry's Yeah, that's okay, where it is right there?

Wait, Elbean, that's main.

That's main.

Yeah, with the duck boots.

I'm just trying to orient myself.

I appreciate that Massachusetts.

That's the Bay Colony.

I love a good fisherman sweater.

I've been to Boston.

There you go.

Is that New England, Massachusetts?

Yes, it is so.

Walcott, Vermont was named for a signer of the Declaration of Independence, because I think almost everything back there is General Oliver Walcott, Okay, Oliver, Yeah, Oliver Walcott, not just some of Walcott now, despite the fact it's been around for damn near the whole history of the United States.

In twenty twenty, the population of the town, according to the census, was a mere sixteen hundred and seventy people.

Sixteen hundred, yes, small all right.

Now, just to be New England.

Confusing an insular in the town of Walcott, there's also the village of Walcott, oh, which is an unincorporated village with the exact same name.

It's like a Russian nesting dolls of Walcott pack.

And I know that it's a virtue to be parsimonious, like in New England they're like, oh, yes, be like frugal and smart with your money and with your time and energy.

But I think they could have spared the effort to come up with a different name for the village, like come on, live a little New England.

Yeah, it's the new Gidea Center Walcott.

How many licks does it take to get to the village of Walcott.

Anyway, back to the town of Walcott, Yeah, the small town is not exactly a prosperous place to live.

The median income I look this up is this is not per adult, this is per household.

That's how you figure media income.

It's thirty four thousand, seven hundred and sixty dollars.

Okay, that makes sense for a rural area.

Now add in the average income for a man in Walcott, Vermont is twenty seven and ninety eight dollars.

The average income for a woman in Walcott is twenty one nine and five dollars.

Yeah, right, which means roughly fifteen percent of the town population is just below the poverty line right off the bat, Elizabeth, do you know about the poverty line in the US, and like how it's calculated.

It's not calculated by household income, which is what I thought is calculated by individual income.

Yeah, and individuals residing in a household correct.

Yeah, So you want to take a guess at what the current poverty line is for a single individual in the United States?

What the amount of money.

That is a year?

You know, I want to say it's something absolutely insanely low where you think there's no way you could survive on that.

You're close yours, You're spot on.

Isn't it like seventeen thousand or some really good?

According to the Department of Health and Human Services website for twenty twenty five, for one person, the poverty line is fifteen thousand, six hundred and fifty dollars.

It's in real life federal.

It's across the IRL.

It's above way above.

That, well one hundred percent.

But that's for all of that's federal, so it doesn't matter if you're in California or in Walcott.

Now, for a household with two people living in the poverty line is twenty one thousand for a household with three people living in it's twenty six thousand and six fifty, whereas if you have four people in your household, the poverty line is thirty two thousand, one hundred and fifty dollars.

I bring all this up to point out one the nature of statistics in the United States and how they're disconnected from reality, but also be because none of those are reasonable amounts to live on.

No, like, no, twenty six thousand dollars twenty six, six hundred and fifty for three people, that works out to be twenty dollars per month.

That's before taxes are taken out.

And then have you seen the price of meat lately?

I mean, no, wonder Hamburger Helper is flying off the showw you know I just did.

Anyway, that's the backdrop for this story.

Hard times in rural America and the poverty that grips the people in those regions, which is very real.

And there are rural areas in every state in the Union.

One hundred percent, maybe one thousand percent.

How big a percent can I get out the President's way up there.

I don't want to go that far, but thirteen thousand percent, So.

This is the backdrop that basically this was what motivates today's anti hero the hard times in a rural America.

Sure, by the way, this story is something of a two parter, so let's start with part A or part one.

Now.

On December first, twenty twenty, our anti hero Eric Edson saw an opportunity.

There was this trailer parked behind a workshop.

Sitting on top of the trailer was a mini excavator or as your nephew would say, excavator excavator.

Now, along with the excavator was also a DR Power wheelbarrow, Elizabeth, in case you don't know what a DR Power wheelbarrow is, I'm here to help.

According to the dr website quote, the pro Power wagon can haul up to seven hundred pounds with ease, features a powerful electric starting engine, and a modular cargo bed with removable end panel.

So you think of it kind of like my e bike, right, But it's a wheelbarrow powered wheels.

That's pretty cool, right sure.

I mean, if you're moving like loads of bricks completely.

Any assisted labor like that, yeah, it's definitely cool.

But along with just carrying my lazy butt to the to the kitchen, to get to the water.

Well.

It's like sometimes I used to wish that I had a motorized bed with wheel and that's how I'd go to work.

You not get out of it all.

In Davis, there's a guy he'd made a motorized couch.

You remember, right around on the couch.

It's like such an early burning man thing, same theory.

Now, along with this power equipment, there were also a few bags of cement on the trailer.

So all told, there's an excavator worth twelve thousand dollars, the power wheelbarrow worth about two grand.

The bags of cement, they were like the icing on the this felonious cake worth Yeah.

So when Eric Etson sees all this value just sitting there, what does he do?

Well, of course he thinks to himself, how can I steal that?

That's gotta be worth something on the black market.

Remember just the trailer itself was worth four grand, and you steal the trailer and all that comes with it.

So Edson's he backs up his Toyota pickup truck attaches the trailer.

Then smooth is like melting ice cream rolling down a child's hand.

Off he goes.

Now for reasons only, Edson can explain he didn't go directly to like a garage and like high or like a crime layer or anything.

No, he takes his new stolen booty on like a tour of the town.

This why not, Yeah, it's in our land, pirate.

He just drives around town for at least an hour.

I assume he's driving around, like hitting up different people he knew who might be in the market for a hot dr power wheelbarrow excavator.

Listening to Madonnas this used to be my playground most likely.

I also think he may have been in no judgment, but I'm guessing he had trouble finding maybe a drug dealer who wanted to trade for a mini excavator.

I mean, let's be real, like, where are you going to move something like that?

Yeah, I mean there's only so many construction people in the town of sixteen.

The local consignment shop.

What do we take for the trailer?

The whole thing fully loaded?

Either way.

After an hour him driving around town with a stolen trailer, he's spotted by a sheriff's deputy.

This is a town of sixteen.

Yes, it's very small town.

There's not much town's over exactly there's not much town to drive around anyway.

The deputy had heard about the stolen trailer, so he turns on his lights and sirens.

He loves exactly pulls over Edson.

So this thief he complies.

He pulls over on the side of the road, and then when the deputy steps out of his patrol car, Edson floors it.

He takes off his little Toyota pickup trailers off with the attached to olen trail with a full paload trip totally.

So the deputy just runs back to his cruiser, hops in he gives chase.

So now we got the Sheriff's deputy in high speed pursuit of the Toyota pickup with the trailer loaded down with the mini excavator and the dr power wheelbarrow.

Meanwhile, Edson, he's driving like an amateur NASCAR driver, right, he's this high speed car chase reaches top speeds of seventy five miles per hour.

I'm talking over hill and Dale Elizabeth through snowy woods like he's Robert Frost.

He's trying to get away, right.

Edson's taking side roads, He's taking dirt roads.

He's like in the dukes of Hazzard.

But he like he thinks he can ditch this small town deputy, the small down deputys like, this is not Hazard County, and I am not Roscoe Pea coletrane Son, and you damn she ain't one of the duke boys.

Now, at one point, the trailer becomes unhitched like not like it gets divorced and it's on mayor yeah, unhitched like it's now he is no longer connected to the truck, except for Edson had done the due diligence before he drove off with the stolen trailer.

You see, he'd attached the emergency chains for this exact possibility.

God, yeah, in case the trailer got undone from the pickup truck.

For the blight.

Exactly probably most likely, I mean about it.

So now the trailer is swimming around behind his little Toyota pick up as Edson tries like held us straight in the curves and flatten the hills, and he loses the sheriff's deputy on those country back roads.

So I guess at this point when he's like, okay, I ditched the deputy, where should I go?

He goes back into town.

According to local news reports, Edson eventually drives into the North Hyde Park Fire Department parking lot, like like really sun anyway, next thing you know, he drives across the lawns of two different homes, and his whole dukes of hazard escape plan finally ends when he crashes his Toyota truck into a stone wall.

Boom.

Yeah.

At this point, he hops out makes a break for it.

He's like, well, forget all that stuff, wasn't my truck.

Anyway, he runs through the woods, he makes the tree line Elizabeth.

He manages to ditch the deputy again.

So the deputy then calls in the canine units.

Because even this town, as small as they were, I guess maybe a neighboring town or maybe this town I don't know, had canine units.

Dogs are turned loose in the woods.

They go off barking off after him, slippery as he is.

The police dogs were successful.

They catch up to Edson at this like babbling brook, which the news stories were always keen to point out, They're we got a babbling brook.

I'm like, is there another kind of brook, isn't there?

Like yeah, like a gossipy brook.

So, once he's cornered and caught, the deputies arrived, they handcuff them, arrest him, and know when he's arrested, the cops find meth and suboxone in his pockets.

A suboxone, if you're not familiar, is typically used as an opioid treatment for medication.

However, folks can get addicted to it since it's essentially a low grade opioid.

So at this point in the Lamielle County Superior Court, fifty one year old Eric Edson of Burlington, Vermont now pleads guilty on charges of grand larceny and running from the police.

He's initially given seven years behind bars.

Yeah, that's reduced to seventeen months in prison.

Wow.

Now that was my man, Eric Edson's first time running from the law, or at least the first time he got caught.

And that's just to introduce you to his modus operandi aka the dukes of hazard of meth.

Now, next up we'll get into his much wilder chase.

It was so epic even the Coastguard got involved.

What.

Yeah, but first these messages and will be back in a bit.

We're back, Elizabeth.

Hey, So now and he asked you another question, Yeah, what do you know about Burlington Vermont aka home of the Burlington Kochek.

I was gonna say, is there a factory there?

Wait, that's about all I know.

Placing my finger to my ear, I'm being told that is not correct.

Burlington Cote Factory is not from Burlington, Vermont, which I always assumed is said.

The company of the full name Burlington Coat Factory Warehouse Corporation was founded in Burlington Township, New Jersey.

So they try and play it off, right yeaheah.

They don't act like we're from New Jersey.

It's much more like we're from Vermont.

Yeah, they're trying to you know.

The fun fact Burlington Cote Factory was founded by a librarian.

Interesting she saved up her money and decided to get into the coke game.

Hey, I don't know.

I guess a lot of coats were left in the library.

She's like, I could move these way.

Back in nineteen seventy two, Henrietta Milstein talked to her husband Monroe, into taking the seventy five grand she'd saved up working as a librarian and invested in a former factory outlet store in where Burlington Township, New Jersey.

Seventy five grand that was The down payment for the full price for the former factory outlet store was six hundred and seventy five thousand back in nineteen seventy two.

Whoa, Now, the first store was the success, which led to a second store, and then the third store and a fourth store, and you get the idea of the rest is history.

That's a beautiful story.

Not founded in Burlington, Vermont, as I've always assumed.

So what is Burlington, Vermont actually known for?

Great question?

Well, turns out the answer is nothing.

No, I can't, I can't.

Burlington, Vermont is a charmingtown.

I've been through there numerous times.

For one, is the largest most populous city in the state of Vermont, population forty seven and forty three.

Wow right wow.

By hometown a small town Davis, California when I grew up, and it was like fifty two thousand, and that was like a small We're considered a college town.

Yeah, yeah, this is the most populous city in Vermont.

That's according last census data.

Now, the city of Burlington, which is its official name City of Burlington, is primarily a college town, also home to Champlain College and the University of Vermont.

Also, it's a popping hub for renewable energy.

I learned.

Notably, it's the first city in the US to be powered solely by renewable energy.

Go on Burlington, and at one time it was the third largest lumber market in the world.

That was in the nineteenth century.

So that's the longer the case world.

So why am I telling you this.

All about Burlington Vermont?

Sure?

Well, another great question, Elizabeth.

I'm just you're coming with your a game.

Love that love your curiosity.

The reason I'm telling you about Burlington, Vermont is because that's called setting the stage.

Oh is that what this is is?

Yeah?

Burlington is where Eric Edson, our Crimer the Day, is from and where he would make his name as an escape artist.

The story goes on August twenty fourth, twenty twenty three, Edson walks into a store.

What store, the Sierra Trading Post on five five five Shelbourne Road, come down and visit in Burlington, Vermont.

Once inside, he gets to shopping.

Trouble is, he doesn't have the funds to pay for his fines.

So what does he do?

He tries to walk out with the stuff.

We'll just put it back.

Yeah, He's like, no, no, I got it in my hands, already really attached these just his shirt would be dope on me.

So he tries to make it out the door.

I think he got out the door because, as the police bulletin states, quote when I see the era, a trading post employee asked Edson to return the merchandise to the store.

Edson told the employee, dude, I'll blow your head off.

Whoa, and partially pulled an item that appeared to be a firearm from his hooded sweatshirt pocket.

So apparently this employee thought to himself, I don't get paid enough to stop this.

Well, he's pulling a gun out of the kangaroo pocket in his hoodie.

Exactly, No, were some outdoor gear.

Well, if you want to know the stolen goods, his haul of merch it consisted of one a backpack, eleven shirts, a pair of sneakers, a pair of socks, and a water jug o.

Yeah, definitely not worth getting your head below.

No, not at all.

Altogether, the stolen booty was valued at a grand total of three hundred and seventy four dollars.

Yeah.

So once the employee backs off at this point, Edson runs over to his waiting vehicle tosses in his ill gotten gains, and then the land pirate drives off.

Yeah, this is how our story begins.

Flash forward to a week later, August thirtieth, twenty twenty three.

Yeah, two officers from the Burlington PD are called out to do a welfare check.

It seems someone has spotted this dude quote passed out in a running vehicle.

So now these two officers respond to the call and they quickly locate the vehicle and the still passed out man.

Officers step out of their patrol car.

They walk over to the vehicle and I assend like I'm imagining the tapping night stick on the window.

Sure anyway, Oh, I forgot to mention the vehicle matched the description of the car using the robbery at Sierra Trading Post a week prior.

Oh detail.

Yeah, so their officers have a reason to believe this might be the same guy the robber who, as I remind you, flashed what looked to be a gun.

So the Kausea cops approach.

They're a little bit wary about confronting the passed out man because he could wake up, get scared, start blasting.

However, since it is their job to wake come up.

They carefully rouse the man and they check to see if he's still alive.

Elizabeth, he is still alive, very much alive, indeed.

And when he wakes up and there are two police officers staring down at him through the window, he gets heated.

No, and I quote from the police, he became belligerent and uncoopered.

So, but that's not all.

Apparently the man was no fan of cops, so or perhaps he was worried that they were there about the whole Sierra Trading Post incident.

I don't know what his motivation was, but what I do know is this, since his car was already running and he's now wide awake and in the driver's seat, there's only one other thing he needs to do, which is pressed down on that gas battle which is empty, right, it's right there, So he puts it in gear and he floors it.

Problem was, the cops were apparently on either side or somehow close enough to the car that, as the police report states, quote, he fled at a high rate of speed, assaulting both officers with the vehicle and the process.

So they go off their feet.

And I don't want you to worry about them.

They were uninjured.

They just got knocked down, knocked back, eyes with how I imagine it.

Anyway, the cops raced back to their cruiser and began to chase them in, but try as they might, my old land pirate Eric Edson gets away His getaway vehicles next spotted where he abandons it in a place called the North Avenue Cooperative.

Now I was thinking, oh, this is Ramont North, I have a new cooperative.

I bet it's some like commune, like a bunch of like aging hippies that are wrong.

It was described in local news as quote a manufactured home park in Burlington's New North End.

Okay, so I'm pretty sure that means like in newspeak, a trailer park.

Trailer park.

Yeah.

Yeah, So anyway, the officers from Burlington PD attempt to seize the abandoned vehicle, but while they're waiting for the tow truck the cops they spot a man watching them who's not too far away.

He seems to me watching them with intent.

So, as you guessed it, it's the purp Edson are police have Eric blocked his access to what I assume is his stolen vehicle, so he does the next best thing.

He hooks it.

He runs off, but he doesn't run for very long because next thing you know, he steals a bicycle and he attempts to get away on his new hot bike.

Also, it seems he may have still had the same firearm, because multiple eyewitnesses later claimed to have seen him brandishing the handgun.

So he's on this hot bike waving a handgun around, like get away from me or whatever.

So he's riding around a small town on a stolen bike waving a gun.

Doesn't take Edson long to do the math.

He realizes he's going to get caught, so he's like, how far can I go fling on two wheels?

I'm going to need a new getaway vehicle.

Yeah, Elizabeth, you want to guess what he steals next?

I have no idea what he could be stealing.

For your first hint, Edson rides his stolen bike down to a place called Apple Tree Bay.

Once there, he ditches the bike.

He spots a much better getaway vehicle, a sailboat.

Oh my god, And he's like a sailboat, not even like a craft.

No, No, that would be like makes too much sense.

He's like, I almost something I could live on.

So he's like time for this lampirate to take to the seas.

So that's exactly what he does.

He steals the sailboat and like Enya and the Orinoco Flow, he tries to sail away, sail away Christopher Cross.

Right.

So the police they can't just commandeer sailboats and they're like tarn it.

So then they do the next best thing.

They contact the coast guard.

We're going to need you to bring in somebody.

And they're like, just name the boat, right, Yeah, he's on a lady's pleasure.

It's just come up.

So they asked the coast guard to catch this purp.

Right.

It doesn't take the coast guard long to spot Edson in his stolen sailboat.

I don't know if he's like just like like, you know, tacking incorrectly.

When you run one.

Motor to get out, you know of like, uh, you know a harbor, harbor, you.

Don't you don't go very fast, No you're not supposed to.

But it also just can't.

Then once you get out in the open seas, you still don't go very fast.

Whole tail in a sailboat with the motor.

Now, but when the winds up and you get yeah, sure, get some speed, but still you could be all America's cups slicing through the water.

It's like a coast guard cutter.

Oh no, forget about that.

You know, game over.

So they intercept him on the open seas pretty quickly and using their coast guard boat.

I don't know if it was a coast guard cutter, but it'll say a coast guard boat.

They forced Edson to turn back for land.

They're like, go back to where you belong.

They just like circled around in like the donuts.

So at this point Edson is fully committed to getting away.

He's like, I've come too far.

So he doesn't give up.

He damned does not the coastguard to tell him what to do or board his stolen sailboat.

So he does head for the like what they're what they're telling him to do.

He heads for land, but he doesn't stop there.

He just runs right into land.

He runs a sailboat aground.

Yeah I'm taking like I'm talking like.

He smashes the boat into like the base of a cliff, a place called rock Point, which I have to assume these are rocky cliffs, sure, because I do know that all I know is this, I'll tell you what I do know Edson.

He can't just like run aground on sandy shores.

One there's the keel of the sailboat.

I think something deep because eventually he's forced to leap from the boat onto wet rocks.

And what we do know for sure is, as the police report states he abandoned the craft.

It's like he's going out of his way at every step to make it worse.

The next Edson continues on foot, he now does his patented Edson move.

He runs off into the woods, and the one the woods that surround the cliffs at Rock Point.

So at this point, you know, it's like when in doubt, head for the woods.

That's what my daddy taught me exactly.

So at this point, officers the local Colchester Police Department arrive on the scene to help catch this slippery purf.

But those officers, they're up at the top of the cliffs, and thus they couldn't locate Edson down where he is because he's below them and he's run into the woods.

But they can see him kind of like darting between the trees.

So they call out to him, like, hey, buddy, where have you surrounded, come out with your hands up.

The cops trive this multiple times to quote, make contact and start negotiations.

So now we have a multi jurisdictional task force of officers working the same scene.

You have the Coast guardsmen from the Coast Guard working the shore.

You have the original Burlington cops working alongside with cops from the Colchester PD.

They're soon joined by officers from the University of Vermont PD, along with canine cops from the Essex Police Department.

Total task force.

Meanwhile, the Burlington PD turns to yet another agency for help, the Vermont Department of Fish and Wildlife.

Everybody, he's in the woods Elizabeth.

They're like, well, that's your jurisdiction.

So, according to BPD, as the police the latter report and their bulletin on the ongoing manhunt, quote, it was thanks to their efforts that BPD personnel was able to get on to shore to search the Rock Point area.

Now, altogether, with all this assistance, this task force of multiple law enforcement agencies, they still cannot find or locate Edson or apprehend him.

Even with the canine unit on the case.

This time, he's able to evade the dogs so he escapes fully into the woods.

So the police, the cops, they turned to the public for help.

They put out bulletins with photos of Edson and they basically tell the public, if you see this man, call us for now.

Up to August thirty first.

One week later, the Burlington PD put out yet another police bulletin.

It's an update on their manhunt and the update is Edson is spotted in a neighboring town in nearby Fairfax, Vermont.

Their officers informed the public quote, police are seeking the public's help and locating a man who was involved in an armed robbery and pursued in Burlington last week.

Police release surveillance photos of Eric Edson today.

The fifty two year old has wanted for the robbery of a man on Goose Pond Road.

Edson has also wondered for the theft of multiple vehicles in Cambridge and Fairfax.

So you want to take a guess at what new to him vehicle Edson at this point has stolen for his prolonged flight from the law.

I have no idea.

Stop guessing, Elizabeth, you never guess.

I'll never guess it.

As the Fairfax PD explained in their bulletin.

Edson has quote been most recently seen operating a full sized John Deere tractor in the Fairfax area.

No, but his means of transportation at this point are unknown.

He's just going for slower and slower vehicles.

He's like, it's slow, let's wrong, I'll do it.

So he's now got this big hass green and yellow John Deere tractor as his getaway vehicle in small town from hot I also, I have to assume he is not sober for most of his Did he stole a John Dear tractor?

Tractor jack?

Somebody like out there in the field just shoved him off.

No.

I think he came upon like a basically a house and he saw the tractor was just sitting at jack up on a guy get off the track, shoves him off, his hand in his pouch pocket for his exactly stealing a full sized tractor.

That just smacks of being high as hell.

In my book, that's methad logic, right.

And it's not like he's gonna steal a tractor and be like I'm going to make a run for the Canadian border.

Now, there's no logic to any of them.

None whatsoever.

You cannot find a path to loge.

I want to stop and say, now, honestly, how do you think this is going to play out?

I shouldn't be laughing, But apparently the police chief of Burlington, John Murrad, knew that people would be laughing because he came forward to warn the public that quote.

Because of the unusualness of mister Edson's various modes of flight, from cars to bikes, to paddle boards, to sailboats to tractors, it's easy to lose sight of the fact that mister Edson is a dangerous person.

Don't you laugh?

Guys, He's silly, but he's dangerous.

Yeah, he's still likely ar yeah, his packet.

He also, by the way, the gun could be a water gun.

Nobody has seen him fire it or even really get ready.

You know, it could just be like, hey, I got a gun.

It could could be a toy gun.

Who knows.

Anyway, So we have this dude probably flying high on math, possibly armed with the fire arm, possibly arm with the water gun, whatever, stealing whatever he can go that goes slowly.

Yeah, So and to go where where is he trying to get?

To question?

Well, because you know I joked earlier about making a run for the border.

Yeah, but it's not like he was actually close to the Canadian border where they are in Vermont.

It's like sixty miles, like fifty to seventy miles, So i'll say sixty miles away.

That's a bit of a drive on a John Deere tractor.

That is.

Now, that's like a plot of like a movie, you know, trying to make the run for the border.

You have to stop and fill up that tank right now.

The next update the please share with the public is that Edson's still at large, is driving around the area, but he'd stolen a new vehicle.

Oh no, don't worry.

I won't make you guess this time.

I'll just tell you what it is.

Or rather I'll let the Burlington and Fairfax pd tell you.

According to the latest bulletin on the ongoing man hunt, Edson had stolen yet another slow moving get away vehicle, as a Burlington DPD put it quote.

Surveillance footage showed Edson on Goose Pond Road in Fairfax on Wednesday.

One image shows him approaching the door of her residence.

The second shows him operating a stolen dump truck.

A dump truck Elizabeth, he's now harmed in dangerous hi giraffe eyebrows driving a stolen dump truck around the backwards of Vermont.

You gotta give him credit, though they haven't caught him yet.

Right, it's apparently working.

So how far can he possibly get in a stolen dump truck?

And what is he going to steal next?

Well, rather than tell you that, I'd like you to close your eyes and I'd like you to picture it.

It's a calm Thursday in September, September seventh, twenty twenty three, to be exact.

And you, Elizabeth, are working as a game warden for the Vermont Department of Fish and Wildlife.

It's early afternoon, just after lunchtime for lunch, you enjoyed one of those bowls of ruffage you like rabbit food your coworkers like to call it.

Anyway, Just after you finish your rabbit food lunch, your radio squawks to light A tip has been called in.

The notorious land pirate Eric Edson has been spotted all no longer driving the stolen dump truck.

You hear the report that he's been seeing on the Lambiel River paddling what's presumed to be a stolen kayak.

You know you're not that far from the river, so you run to your truck, fired up and head over to the location where Edson was last spotted.

When you arrived there, there's a makeshift task force of multiple law enforcement agencies in their vehicles.

There's all kinds of cop cars from neighboring towns parked alongside trucks from your co workers at the Vermont Department of Fish and Wildlife.

You hop out and use your radio to find out the latest.

Your radio squawks again with a report back.

Edson is still on the river.

You head down to the water's edge, not far from Vermont Route one oh four A, and you stomp your way through the underbrush of twigs and summer dried leaves.

You hear someone a splashing in the river.

When you break through the woods, you spot it there.

He is paddling like hell, headed up river.

You call out to him, Eric, Edson, we have you surrounded.

Edson spins around on a kayak and spots you on the northern bank of the river.

Then he cranes his neck around the other way.

It sees all kinds of cops pushing through the woods on the southern bank of the river.

He decides to chance it on your side.

He paddles towards you on the northern bank.

You snake through the trees and try to catch up to him before he can disappear again into the woods.

You call out again, Edson, freeze, you're under arrest.

That's about as useless as bring an all beef franks to a vegan pot.

Look Edson sets foot on dry land and immediately starts running.

You give chase.

The twigs and leaves sound beneath your hiking boots.

You're far faster than he expects you are.

You draw within about twenty feet of him to get away.

He decides to double back for the river.

He stops running when he reaches a wide flat rock at the river shore.

He turns back and yells, oh innocent.

You look at him like Tommy Lee Jones, and you coolly tell him I don't care.

In response, he turns towards the river and he jumps off the wide flat rock with a mighty splash.

He drops back into the river.

Then he attempts to slim across.

You watch from the shore as he tries to make it across that wide, slow moving river.

He does make it on the southern bank.

He crawls out, sopping wet.

He waves back at you and then disappears into the woods.

You can hear the cops on the other side as they spot them, and they release the dogs.

Moments later, you're radio squawks to life again.

Eric Heedsen has been caught near the Georgia Mountain Road.

You may not have caught him, but you're damn sure glad you did your part to bring in the most wanted man, the ever slippery Eric Edson.

Nice work, game Ward and Elizabeth, thank you.

As soon as he's busted, Eric Edson requests a medical evaluation.

That means fire and rescue.

You have to come out.

And now we got a larger task force.

Members of the Milton Police Department and the Franklin County Sheriff's Office I just keep naming.

They're also on the scene to provide support when Edson's taken into custody.

Not to mention the Colchester and the Essex Police departments who also dispatched resources to assist.

What a chase.

It was like the fugitive, except in your case.

Eventually, you and all these cops and game Wards and Coast guardsmen, you all finally get your man.

So let's take a little break and now he's been caught.

Catch a breather, and when we get back, we'll find out what justice looks like for a land pirate in Vermont.

That look like we're back, Elizabethaber.

You ready to hear how this mad methkaper comes to a tiger close?

Yes, well, now that Eric Edson is caught, what does justice look like?

Well?

Edson goes to court the very next day, on Friday, just one day after all you apprehended him, and just like he said to you, he denies it was him.

I'm innocent, as the local headlines proclaimed, armed robbery suspect who evaded police for a week denies charges in court, which makes perfect sense.

I mean he's facing multiple charges.

Of course, you know he's going to do his best impression of the singer Shaggy and say it wasn't me.

He's got to have a public defender, and they're always pushing for just kind of deals.

Oh pretty much.

So when he's standing there in the Crittenden County Superior County Criminal Court, Edson enters a not guilty plea at his arraignment.

The charges he's facing, by the way, are assault for how he tossed the two cops from the wellness check sure when he first fled.

And then also he's got the original robbery charges from the Sierra Trading Post and forget that which involved a weapon allegedly, right, and then you have to add in all of the stolen vehicles.

For instance, Elizabeth.

For just the stolen sailboat, Edson faced quote two counts of unauthorized use of a boat and three counts of careless and negligent operation of a vessel as the result of the alleged theft of a sailboat.

Yeah, so he's facing multiple charges just from the seilboat.

And then you add in the stolen bike, the stolen John Dear tractor, don't forget the dump truck.

Each of those separate charges with the related driving charges anytime he got he was He's not like he was speeding, but you know, reckless endangerment.

Of course, there's also the charges for running from the law.

Naturally, the judge recognizes that Edson is what we call a clear flight risk.

Yeah, that's his whole mo.

So the judge orders have held without bail.

Edson gets locked up the north West State Correctional Facility in Saint Albans, Vermont.

Perhaps his time behind bars allows him to like sober up.

I don't know, but he eventually realizes what sort of time he's going to be facing.

So because he recants, he's not guilty, plead Instead, Edson takes a plea deal.

Like you said, he gets offered a pleae deal.

Yeah, but that was just the local charges.

Edson was still facing federal charges Coastcard.

Yeah.

So you see, the day after he was first caught, a federal grand jury had been convened, and the federal grand jury returned to simple one count indictment based on the Hobbes Act.

What's well, on November eighth, he settles those federal charges because he accepted an offer from the US Attorney's office that was to settle the charges that he violated the Hobbs Act.

And as you are wondering, Zaren, what the heck is the Hobbs Act, I asked the bust question the absolute best.

I'm really glad you asked, because according to the Department of Justice, the Hobbs Act quote is prohibits actual or attempted robbery or extortion affecting interstate or foreign commerce.

Maybe maybe wondering how does that apply in this instance?

Well, luckily the DOJ helpfully explains on its website.

Although the Hobs Act was enacted as a statute to combat racketeering and labor management disputes, the statute is frequently used in connection with cases involving public corruption, commercial disputes, violent criminals and street gangs, and corruption directed at members of labor unions.

And I still am not seeing how that.

I'm guessing Edson qualifies as a violent criminal because at the Sierra Trading Post having been gone, it starts us all off.

Or perhaps he's a one man street gang.

Who knows, or perhaps the maybe the Sierra Trading Post was a member for labor union this was I don't know.

But in response to his plea deal in December of twenty twenty three, Edson was convicted and sentenced to four years in federal prison with a subsequent three years of supervised release, which means he got less time for this one than the first one I told you about.

Oh yeah, it is justice.

And so ends the mad Methkaper of the Land Pirate.

The Burlington bandit.

So what's a ridiculous takeaway here, Elizabeth.

Let's see, I think stay off drugs.

That's a good one.

And always you always have to think through like what am I seeking here?

What relief do I seek?

Or what outcome am I seeking?

And I'm just.

Really curious, like if you were to sit him down and try and get him clear headed and say, how do you see this completely playing out?

Yeah?

No, totally.

I don't think he's the endgame.

I don't think he ever had one.

I mean based on his like, oh, I'm going to steal the dump truck, I'm a steal a tractor.

I think he was very much as you know some of like the life coaches that some of the Buddhists might say is live in the moment.

He was very much living in the moment.

Well, and as I harp on impulse control, yes, he has zero.

Slow and low.

It is the tempo.

Well, it's like the thought crosses his mind and he just does it.

There's zero impulse control.

So his impulse is I have to run.

I have to get away.

They can't catch me.

Yeah, can't get caught again?

Are you going back?

So there's a boat, so.

Yeah, exactly.

And also sailboats that seems fun.

You know who doesn't like them?

The other ones run out again, this doesn't run out of wind.

That's right, I can just go forever, Zaren, what's your ridiculous Oh thank you for asking?

What day is it?

My birthday is?

Wow.

Well, since you're interested, I will say this, how many Keystone cops in Vermont did it take to catch him?

How many agencies did I list off?

I mean I lost track personally, I don't even know.

Human hours dedicated to this one right goofball?

Like, I'm just I was blown away, like how many?

Like I'm like, you guys like there's like thirty five cops involved, maybe seventy five.

I have no idea.

This is a ridiculous number.

And then you guys are still like it took them weeks to catch up.

That's what I can.

And these are small towns.

It's like, can you just like cordon off the parts of the streets and be like, Okay, I know he's in the woods and stuff, but I mean, like.

Honestly, if he were down in the South.

It would have shot him.

No, they had when I lived.

Down there, on the news, when people would do these sort of things.

They drag their mama out and the mom wol you got to come in.

You got to come in.

You cannot do this.

You are hurting me, you are hurting our family.

And then like you know, the next day he turns himself in.

I like that.

We both went into junior immediately.

You just know exactly that is so true though, this is exactly what would happened in this out.

They would they pull out mama and she a big, big mob either one whoever's living, and he's the oldest woman in the family, right, and she's gonna like shame him for what he's done and.

Tell him like this, this ain't right.

You have got to come home.

You've got to turn yourself in.

And nine times nine times it's amazing.

So you in the mood for a talkback and watch this all down talkbacks pretucerd can you favor us with one?

Oh my god, because I love ge.

Hell over, dude.

Just someone goes out to a visit.

But check out the Note Gallery.

It has everything from art forgeries and how do you say cucumber.

Alec Baldwin did a podcast on.

It, and the art director of the gallery who only bought the forged painting because it had a signature that misspelled Jackson Pollock's name.

Check it out, love you guys.

Bye, Oh my god, that's incredible typo.

But is that legal protection?

You know?

It's like, oh, this is Jackson.

Pollack Colick Pollick.

Yeah, that actually could that's good cover?

Right?

Is it a crime off by one letter?

Go?

I love it well as always.

You can find us online Ridiculous Crime on social media that's mostly Instagram and blues Guide.

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We will catch you next crime.

Ridiculous Crime.

It is hosted by Elizabeth Dutton and Zaron Burnette, produced and edited by the light Fingered Fellow of Providence, Rhode Island, Dave Kustin, and starring Annalis Rucker as who.

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