Trish: Good morning everyone, and welcome to the birth experience.

Today I have the pleasure of talking to one of my students, Sarah Ebrahimi, which I've been practicing, so I didn't bot your last name.

So Sarah is a calm labor confident birth student, and I am so excited to talk to her.

And you guys, you are gonna be so pleasantly shocked because Sarah is only seven weeks postpartum.

And we started to talk about how she's feeling before we started recording, but I want you guys to jump in on this conversation.

So first, before we go there, Sarah, I would love for you to introduce yourself.

Just tell everyone.

What number, baby?

Just tell us a little bit about you and how you found the labor.

Nurse Mama Birth classes.

Sarah: Sure.

So I am, in my late thirties.

I'm 37.

I'm a first time mom.

I live in the Washington DC region.

I grew up in New England, lived in New York City for a couple years, spent the majority of my twenties living and working abroad, mostly in Latin America.

So had a lot of exposure to different types of healthcare systems through that experience.

Moved to the DC area about 10 years ago for work.

I work in international development and I, I was diagnosed, well, not diagnosed, but when I turned 35, I hadn't met my husband at that point, and I was, I always knew I wanted to become a mom.

So during one of my annual O-B-G-Y-N checkups, I said, you know, just for the heck of it, let's run some baseline numbers regarding fertility, just to get some, some benchmarks.

It turned out that I had really low a MH and high prolactin, and so those were some markers that indicated that I might have some challenges conceiving in the future, and that led me down a path of, looking into my fertility, looking into freezing my eggs, and really trying to understand my health holistically.

So, mm-hmm.

To my surprise, fast forward.

Three years.

I ended up spontaneously getting pregnant while engaged to my now husband.

And that sparked kind of my journey of, okay, I've learned so much about my health and my body and really wanting to, you know, explore the more natural options first.

And Trish, I don't remember exactly when I found you, but I do remember in those.

Very early weeks of pregnancy listening to your weekly, you know, what to expect during this Week of Pregnancy podcast episodes.

Okay, Uhhuh.

So it was definitely very, very early on in the first trimester that I discovered you, and it was towards the end of, 2024.

When my, I knew, I knew I wanted to sign up for Calm Labor Confident, and it was when I knew that my, flexible house spending account dollars were gonna expire on December 31st.

And so I remember at the New Year's Eve, I think it was 10:00 PM and I was like, all right, it's time I pull the trigger because I know I wanna be a member of this course.

I've already consumed.

So much podcast content that I was like, it's time.

Let me become an official student of Trish Ware.

So

Trish: that's the, that's the story.

Happy, happy New Year.

Yes.

I love that so much.

I wanna rewind because your story is so fascinating and I love that you said you went and you got the labs done and some things were off somewhat.

Did you, did you change your diet?

Did you start doing things?

'cause I know you were exploring all of that, but what kind of changes did you make?

Sarah: Yeah, so leading up to freezing my eggs, I actually went down to Argentina to freeze my eggs 'cause that was where I had lived for a while and really, you know, had a good network, had a good, confidence in the healthcare system.

And the doctors down there, they're much more.

Holistic, I would say.

And so in conversations, my doctor, she recommended that I look into, fertility, acupuncture.

So I've been doing acupuncture.

Okay.

On a almost weekly basis now since January of 2023.

And I also started following some different, accounts on Instagram educators in the healthcare field such as yourself, that really looked at kind of, you know, how does your diet, how does your lifestyle, what are those changes that we can make to help, you know, best support our bodies.

Mm-hmm.

And I've, you know, my parents.

My mother is very much, if I'm sick, give me a pill.

I will take any pill that the doctor tells me to.

And very, you know, a very good patient.

Yeah.

In that perspective, my father is the opposite.

He is, why would I take a blood pressure pill when I can change my diet and when I can do exercise?

So I had both of those influences growing up and I see their health outcomes now.

And my father is 13 years older than my mother yet can kind of out lap her in every way related to, and you know.

Good health.

And so I've always related a little bit more to, kind of going the more, you know, see what we can do to change our lifestyle first.

Okay.

And so going into pregnancy.

I continued with the acupuncture, brought in, other wellness practices such as meditation, lots of yoga, self care, therapy.

That's also been a big piece of piece of this puzzle just to keep stress and anxiety at ease during so many, uh, you know.

Overlapping life, life moments, you know, planning a wedding and planning for your first child.

Those are two major life events that both do fall.

Yeah.

Have a lot of the tasks fall on the woman.

And so being able to juggle and manage both of those, really important events was definitely stressful, but well worth it.

Trish: I, I, there's just so many ways that we could go, like so many different things, but I love that you brought up that.

You were healing your inside, you were working on your mindset because mm-hmm.

I say this all the time, which, you know, birth is 90% mental and it's so true.

Yes, it's so true.

Absolutely.

So I love that you had all those tools to use.

And of course we teach a lot of that in the birth class as well.

But I can 100% say 100% say that the women who came into the bedside that I would admit.

That wanted to have an unmedicated birth.

Mm-hmm.

The ones who had education and had like a, a plan of action, especially when it comes to that mental aspect.

Mm-hmm.

And also the way in which they told me they were going unmedicated.

Really indicated to me where they were in their mindset.

So if they said something like, yeah, I'm go, I'm, I'm gonna go, they would, you know, most often said, natural, I'm gonna go natural and here's my plan.

Or on the flip side, if they said, well, I'm gonna try to go unmedicated, I knew for sure we were in trouble.

So I could tell by the way they told me.

So if they said, I'm gonna try, I was like, oh, shoot, this is this, this might not go because you, I, I tell, I tell people all the time, you kind of have to marry that decision.

And it's like, it's like saying, I'm gonna try this marriage out.

Sarah: No, Trish, you know, one thing I put in my birth plan thanks to you was do not offer me pain medication.

It was like written in bold letters on the, the whiteboard in the in labor and delivery, just do not offer pain medication.

I had a doula to support me and I think the, you know.

In addition to calm labor, confident, one of the, you know, the resources that I really relied on was a very, very old school book, IA MA's Guide to Childbirth.

Oh, I love it.

I love that book.

Yeah.

It's just knowing that I was trying to go, you know.

To the, to your point of I'm gonna try it, versus I'm committed to this.

Mm-hmm.

Being a life experience, I wanna have.

Mm-hmm.

I viewed it.

Mm-hmm.

As a, you know, I don't wanna be on my desk bed not knowing what childbirth.

Felt like.

Yeah.

And I think that's part of the, the motivation you have to be really intrinsically motivated mm-hmm.

And know that it's gonna be challenging, but that you really, really want that experience.

And so for me it was a life experience, not just a, a thing to do or something to try.

Trish: And I, I love that you said that because I, I, I did a workshop inside the membership about what is your why, and if you can map that out, why you want to go unmedicated and not just like, well, my mom did dah, dah, dah.

Like really deep down like, what is your motivation for going unmedicated and find that why, and that can help you.

And for any of you guys listening, I highly recommend that you tell the nurses not to ask you.

Because when you're in the throws of labor and then someone's like, here, take this.

Like, come on.

It'll be so much easier.

Here's the candy.

Easier.

Yeah.

Here.

Yeah.

Here you go.

Little one.

You know, like it's so tempting because you're in a much different mental space during labor, and I personally.

And I say this too all the time, there's some things I just say all the time, but when you're in labor, your only job is to labor.

It's not to defend your birth plan.

It's not to advocate for yourself.

It's not to ask all the questions.

That's where your partner can step in.

But if you can get into your labor bubble and stay in that bubble, you golden.

You really are, you know?

Yeah.

So I would love to hear, I, I was looking through your, what you filled out for the podcast, and I love that you're planning this wedding.

And you're planning this baby?

Yeah.

So how far along were you at the wedding?

Six and a half months.

Sarah: Okay, so wedding was, so you were past being sick?

Yeah.

Oh, well I didn't have, you know, I have to say my little baby, we didn't find out the gender until birth, so that was another like element of surprise, which I love.

But yeah, we didn't, you know, God bless our baby, but we were so lucky.

I had very minimal mourning, sickness.

I was able to continue doing yoga Pilates four to five days a week throughout pregnancy.

So like really physically fits.

Mentally well due to kind of the, the self care resources that I described earlier.

And then also just really trying to equip myself.

And I've heard, I listened to your podcast so many times.

I know that you, you love to kind of hear kind of what was the before and after.

And I think my before calm wave confident was I knew what I wanted, but I didn't know the language, the tools, the menu of options.

To get me there.

I am someone that I love to ask questions.

I love to be really well informed in all aspects of my life.

And so for me to know, you know, I'm going to these doctor's appointments, they're not really talking about anything that's gonna happen.

They're very in the moment of, how are you today?

Mm-hmm.

Do you have fetal movement?

Let's get your vitals.

But there's no discussion about here's what to expect.

And knowing how much I like to have information as a source of comfort into a certain degree control.

I felt that your course, it just really, really equipped me with.

You know, as you like to say, the full menu of options and to be able to pick and choose what best suits me, my body, my, my birth goals, and my family, and then go in so that there were no surprises.

I remember being at one point in my labor and realizing, you know, I'm not having those crazy.

I can't do this.

Get the baby outta me, just gimme a cesarean.

Like, you know, intrusive thoughts that are common to, to transition, but I was feeling really different and so I was like, okay, this much.

This must be transition.

This is why I am feeling this way.

And so just to have, you know, there were so many different moments during labor where I could connect back to either something I read or something I heard, or something that you taught in the course that really grounded me to this is familiar, this is expected.

There's nothing to be afraid of.

And I may be getting a little bit ahead in the birth story, but at the end of my, you know, once baby's in my arms and everything is calm, my midwife, she came up to me and she's like, you know, there was just so much tenderness and love in this room.

There was no fear.

There was no room for fear.

It was, she's like, I, I don't often tear up during a birth that I've been doing this a long time, but I was.

I was getting, you know, my tears welling up in my eyes during your birth because of how beautiful it was.

And it was an honor to be here and just such a space of, of love and no fear.

And so I credit so much of that to you, Trish.

Trish: Thank you.

I'm kind of choked up myself because.

That is what birth is supposed to be like.

And unfortunately we've been programmed to see it as this really scary, horrible, you have to endure it and just get through the pain to get to your baby.

And I personally feel like the whole journey is so.

Beautiful and valuable.

And if you approach it with, like, I, I actually was just talking to my daughter today about mindset.

We get to decide, we get to choose how we define things.

And so you can go into your birth really scared, even if you have knowledge.

And this is why I say I have the calm labor, framework where we work on the knowledge, we work on the mindset, and then we work on being able to speak up because there's a lot of women.

Who know what they know.

They feel really confident, but they're too scared to speak up, so they, they end up agreeing to things they don't want.

Yeah.

And so you have to have all three parts, but I love that we get to choose how we view birth going into it and.

You know, does that mean you're gonna have an absolutely perfect birth?

No.

But if you go into it calm and you go into confident, hence the name of the course, you are able to navigate those twists and turns in a much different way than someone who's winging their birth period.

Yes.

Sarah: Yes.

I love that.

Completely agree with that.

Yeah.

And, and to kind of your philosophy around birth, I think that there's, there's something to be said for having all the information, but if you're not able to advocate for yourself, I was just having, you know, brunch with a girlfriend yesterday who's giving birth in October, and she's saying, you know, I have so much anxiety.

I don't know, I don't know how to say no to someone in authority figure.

And I was like, practice your no.

Practicing to come my way.

I, I tried, I tell everyone, I tell everyone, and I, I said, you know, practice your nose.

Practicing no.

To that work commitment that maybe doesn't align with what's on your plate.

Practicing no to that, you know, invitation to a social event that might be more draining than rejuvenating.

You know, practicing no to the easy, easy stakes things in life.

So that when it comes to something really important and.

You know, to tend to switch gears slightly.

One thing that I was really prepared for, but I didn't confront and birth was the, the cascade of interventions and feeling that pressure.

And I credit so much of that to, to you helping educate about how to select providers because my, you know, my gynecologist of 10 years.

So ever since I moved to DC I love her, love her, love her, love the practice, love the hospital that they deliver at.

But the hospital is about 45 minutes from my house where she delivers.

And so I knew, I don't really wanna, when I have options, you know, 5, 10, 15 minutes away, I wanna find a provider that's closer.

So I did all my homework, interviewing different providers, doing those meet and greets, and eventually landed on what I felt was the best practice and the best hospital to support.

Low intervention on medicated births, and after about.

At like 26, 28 weeks, I ended up, getting really sick with the flu.

It was like the peak flu season.

Mm-hmm.

Had some miscommunications regarding what's over the counter.

Medications were okay to take, had some miscommunications around, okay, if your fever stays this high for this long, go into the hospital versus not.

And so I ended up having my confidence quite shaken.

During, during that experience, along with some admin issues regarding scheduling, I found myself questioning, oh my gosh, I'm almost 30 weeks.

Is this still the right practice for me?

And I remember something you said on a podcast, it was My Mamas that have changed.

Practices.

They never regret it.

It's those that stay, that do end up regretting it.

And so, mm-hmm.

I kind of gathered my, gather, my bots, put them in an email to the medical director of the OB department at the hospital.

And she ended up calling me personally and we had like an hour long conversation to really talk through all of the concerns that I laid out and she was able to alleviate those anxieties and I was able to come to a place of, you know, this is the right practice for me.

And they made sure that they really did focus on how to rebuilding my trust as a patient and just to have, you know, that extra push that I got through your course to, to speak up.

To ask those questions.

If something doesn't feel right, don't sit there.

Keep showing up at appointments, not knowing if this.

This really is the right provider and right practice and right delivery, hospital for you.

And so it, it took a bit of, there were some bumps and pain points along the way, but really, you know, your education around self-advocacy is, you know, it carries through all of pregnancy and, and delivery and and parent a life skill.

It's a life skill.

Trish: Yeah.

That's what I was thinking about with your friend.

Being afraid to speak up in your birth can leave with you with lifelong trauma because you'll always wonder.

Speaking up might lead to an uncomfortable situation, but chances of it leading to a lifelong trauma for you is really slim.

Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

And so what I recommend to, to everyone is you start having these hard conversations early and often so you can practice that and you start talking to them and like, you know, things at your appointments, like you said, start saying no to some of the little things.

What that also does is it shows your provider, you're not gonna be the one who's just like, yes, yes, yes.

They, they're like, okay, I might have to go a little deeper with this one.

You know?

And so, and, and the thing is, and unfortunately, especially for us as women, we've been taught to like, be quiet, be meek.

Don't speak up, and like there's, you know, her if she's speaking up, that's that type of person and we have to change that narrative because it is our birth period.

Yeah.

And I say this all the time, your labor nurse, your provider, they're gonna go home.

This is a shift, this is a job for them.

You will never forget those things ever.

So if you guys are listening, like start practicing this muscle now because you'll need it for your children.

You, you will face situations with your children and you wanna be that parent who is confident to speak up.

I, I think the main thing is just getting rid of this feeling that you're doing something wrong because it's not wrong, you know?

Yeah.

Okay.

So I, I don't wanna go on forever 'cause I know my listeners they don't like really long podcasts.

Yeah.

But I want to hear, tell us, leading up to going into labor, tell us about your birth.

Tell us how you're feeling.

Sarah: Yeah, so I ended up, I guess maybe ironically going into labor on the exact kind of average first time mom delivers at 40 plus five 40.

And so I had ended up going into my 40 week appointment, I was being seen by a midwife, and so their practice would allow me to go to 42 weeks.

And I went to my 40 week appointment and I started to have that low, low grade anxiety of, okay, I don't wanna, I know I don't wanna be induced, so what do I need to do?

Yeah.

I had remained active.

I remember I did the mile circuit on a Sunday afternoon going into the evening, and then the next day was a Monday, Sunday into Monday.

I started to have, I woke up at 3 45 in the morning having, very light contractions and I was someone that I've never had difficult.

Period.

So I, I'm not like a, yeah.

Oh, I know cramps.

I can handle, you know, handle pain in that area.

But the, the, the contractions were very light and I remember your advice.

And then the advice of my doula as well was, you know, just try to have a normal day because early labor can last Just ignore it.

Yeah.

Twice and time.

Yep.

So I, I was having, you know, work meetings and calls and made lunch, tried to take a nap in the afternoon, evening time, rolled around.

I did a quick check-in with my doula and she's like, okay, let me hear you.

Go through a contraction.

She's like, yeah, you're, it's still very light.

Let's, let's just have a good night's sleep.

Take a bubble bath, get to bed early.

You need to rest, and then tomorrow we'll start doing all this stuff.

Yeah.

And I took that bubble bath, climbed into bed.

My lower back started having, I don't trust you.

Trish: I don't trust you already.

Sarah: I already don't trust you.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So my my lower back was having a lot of pain.

So I asked my husband, he is, you know, watching a basketball game in the living room.

I say, can you come to bed and just massage my back?

As soon as he climbs into bed, my water breaks.

And I was GVS positive and my hospital had told me, you know, if your water breaks during labor, we wanna get you in so we can get you started on the penicillin.

my contractions increased in intensity, called my doula.

We said, alright, let's all meet at the hospital.

Got to the hospital around 11:00 PM.

At that point, my first thought was, oh shoot, I haven't slept since 3 45 this morning.

How am I gonna do this?

How am I gonna sleep?

Yeah.

Ended up, laboring throughout the.

Throughout the night, throughout the following day, I was very limited with the number of cervical checks that I, that I got because I knew that that was gonna affect my mindset of, oh, I'm only X number of centimeters.

Yeah.

So definitely follow your advice there.

Yeah.

Had my doula that was supporting with changing positions.

And the baby was born at 3:07 PM the following day.

So I had about 36 hours roughly when you combine.

Okay.

The early labor.

Yeah.

And then active labor.

But really in the moment I felt that I had gone in with so many tools in my toolbox.

I had the tens unit and all the balls and the, the comb to squeeze, and I asked for the tub and the shower, and I had everything laid out.

But in the end.

All I could focus on was my breath.

So I think breath work got me through it.

Oh, it's so important.

It really was.

It was just, I just told myself, you know, with each contraction, breathe in for four out for eight.

Yeah.

And then make whatever low guttural noise that felt most instinctive and just to try to keep my jaw as relaxed as possible.

And yes, that was, that was what got me through.

Trish: I, I was gonna ask you what your favorite tool, did you use the tub or the shower?

Sarah: I did, I thought I was gonna love the tub.

I, but the tub is massive, so they don't, they told me, they're like, okay, the tub takes a long time to fill up.

Let's get you in the shower and have this, you be in the shower while we fill the tub.

So I get in the shower and they have this really high powered shower head.

Super.

I love super hot water.

I'm like, one of those scalding hot shower ladies.

Yeah, me too.

So I, I was leaning against the shower wall sitting down.

And during each contraction would put the shower head on my lower back where I had the majority of the pain.

And then they said, oh, the tub's ready.

And I was like, Ooh, can't wait for the tub.

Get in the tub.

Hated it.

I hated the sensation Okay.

Of floating.

This

Trish: is so, okay.

That's weird because need sensation.

I didn't like that.

What was out was so cold.

So like I felt cold.

Yeah.

And so I ended up, I was, for my third, no, for my fourth, I was gonna have a tub birth.

They let us deliver in the tub.

Yeah.

And.

I got so aggravated with my, like the part because I couldn't quite stay out, like down low enough or Ev Yeah.

And so I kept getting so chilled and I was like, forget it.

Get me out of here.

So

Sarah: yeah, I ended up turning my body so that I was in the short side of the tub and I had my feet against in my back against, and I loved the pressure.

Okay, my back and then I would use the shower head on my lower back during the contractions.

But the, the sensation of just like floating felt.

Terrible.

And I was like, I also had That's so interesting.

Really bad shakes and chills throughout, which I knew to expect thanks to your right.

Thanks to your course.

Yeah.

I knew to expect, yeah.

And I just remember thinking, I was like, I'm wasting so my body's wasting so much energy, shivering.

It should be using this energy towards labor and delivery time.

I'm like, this is a waste of being cold, but

Trish: So tell us about the delivery.

Were you in bed?

Did you not get in the bed?

How were you laying?

What?

Yeah.

You know what?

So tell us about that.

Sarah: Right.

So baby was born around 3:00 PM and I think best estimate was around noon.

I started to get into what felt like near constant contractions.

I, the pain of the contraction didn't go away, but what did go away was, just the feeling of the urge to push.

Mm-hmm.

And I remember my midwife, she would just come in and just sit very calmly and be looking at me a couple feet away and just talking to me.

And I remember opening my eyes.

And asking her kind of, okay, so I, I know that I'm not ready to push yet, but what are we waiting for?

What's the, what's the switch?

And I remember her saying, yeah, you'll notice a cha, we'll notice a change in the character of your contractions.

And I remember kind of rolling my eyes and go, great.

I don't know what that means.

Like, gimme something more than that.

Yeah.

Gimme something more concrete.

Because as I said, I like to have, you know, information.

Yeah.

And I just wanna be okay.

Just trust the process.

They, they're gonna, they're gonna tell me a little bit later.

She asked me, she's like, would you like a cervical check?

'cause she could tell I was getting a little bit like, alright, where, yeah, where are we going?

And I said, contemplated it.

And I said, all right, yes, yes, I would.

And she checks and she says, oh, great.

Well you don't, there's, there's no more cervix.

And I can see the baby's head.

And I remember thinking.

Well, what does that mean?

Wait a minute.

She's like, oh.

She's like, oh, it means that we could start pushing.

And I remember thinking, oh, but I'm, but I'm so tired.

You know, I've been awake since 3 45 the day before.

And yeah, I ended up, using a squat bar to start.

So like, on the bed they put some pillows on top of squat bar to make it a little more cozy on my, on my forearms and elbows.

Eventually though my legs just got really tired from holding the weight in my body.

So then I began, you know, squatting

Trish: gets very exhausting.

Sarah: Really, really tired.

Yeah.

And yeah, I, they ended up bringing up the back of the bed so that I could like, rest in between contractions.

And then eventually I stopped being able to, you know, have them bring me back up onto the squat bar.

And I was basically just laying, very much upright.

In, in the bed and pushed baby out about 35 minutes.

But that feeling, that's amazing feeling of, you know, being able to have a big mirror there.

I had just very relaxing meditation, music playing the entire time at the hospital.

My husband, he was able to, you know, catch the baby.

I had warm.

What helped me was the warm compress against my, oh yeah.

Against her vagina during.

Yeah.

And for me, that actually helped in a sense, stimulate the contractions and that, that urge to push.

So I found it very soothing and I had a mild hemorrhage due to my placenta, kind of grabbing on a little bit, but didn't require any intervention.

Very, very small tears.

But didn't require any stitches.

And I remember That's amazing in particularly.

Yeah.

Listening to your, your podcast about tearing.

Yeah.

And I remember feeling, you know, I have no fear about the tearing anymore.

Yeah.

After, after that podcast episode.

So definitely link that, link that episode.

Yeah.

Because it completely removed my fear of tearing.

And I also remember, as I was pushing your conversation around how the ring of fire, but you know, don't.

Don't retreat.

When you feel that.

Yeah.

When you feel that intensity.

Because as a kid, don't,

Trish: don't slam it and don't retreat.

Yeah.

Yes.

It's going to just baby pushes.

Yeah.

Sarah: Yes, yes.

Exactly.

Yeah.

And so you were so present with me all of your advice.

I love it.

Not not only advice, but education, you know, evidence-based, yeah.

Birth education that you provided that made everything feel predictable.

And, oh, this is the, the landmark that I'm at.

Oh, this is what's gonna happen next.

Yeah.

Oh, I remember this being mentioned.

It just makes it all feel, and there's so

Trish: much, there's so much peace in that, and, and I, for those of you guys who haven't listened to me before, one of the things, I know I say it a lot, but I feel like it's.

So true is if you were to, and this happened to me when we went to Italy.

I am normally, so OCD, like I'm type A, like I have everything mapped out.

I print like, this is where we have to go in the train station to get the, to get the train to the city.

And this is the stop.

These are the landmarks.

This is how you get to the Airbnb.

This is what you're gonna see.

Like I have it all mapped out.

And when we went to Italy, I was in the middle of a launch.

We had a ton of things going on.

I was like, you know, whatever.

I had it in some of the stuff in an app in my phone.

I purchased the plan to use my phone in Italy, and we get there and my phone will not work at all.

So I had nothing like, I couldn't even, I didn't even print out the Airbnb information and it was so disconcerting.

And here we are on this amazing trip and I don't wanna sound like I, I like don't appreciate 'cause I do.

But it took a.

It.

It really changed my feelings and my perception of that beginning of that trip because I didn't know what was happening.

I didn't know where to go.

Yeah.

I didn't know how to ask anyone.

I didn't speak the language.

Right, and I thought a lot about that.

That is what it feels like when you go into labor and delivery.

Without the jewels, without the knowledge.

Mm-hmm.

Without understanding the language, you are gonna have this amazing experience that is dampered by all of that.

And so I love that you're like, I knew what was happening.

I knew what to expect.

I knew the landmarks.

Like I always say, your birth is like a map.

You're on a road trip and you've hit, you've hit the welcome to whatever sign, you know?

Yes.

Yes.

And that does make all the difference in the world.

It really does, and it's so beautiful.

It does.

I'm so glad that you shared that.

And for those of you guys listening, I really, I, I say this all the time, take away the fear of tearing because if you're so concentrating on not tearing, you're not gonna push right.

And you're not gonna listen to your body.

And tearing is just a part of how our bodies are made to accommodate the baby that your body made.

And so I again.

We're not flat on our back with our legs up on stirrups, that is going to increase the chances of tearing.

But so does squatting, but yet you were in a semi squatting position and you still knew what to do to keep the tearing from happening.

Sarah: Yes.

You so that felt, that's

Trish: huge.

Sarah: I felt completely comfortable and ready, and I think the only thing I would change is trying harder to get some sleep while I was at home during early labor.

I know it's very hard when you're feeling those contractions, your adrenaline's going, we wanna wake up.

Your husband immediately took Ella everything in my power to not wake him up at 3 45 in the morning.

Like, Hey, it's happening.

It's happening.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Try to get as much rest as you can because once it's game on, you really are, there's no rest.

Yeah.

Getting these like miraculous, like micro naps if and can't, if and when you can.

So when you can, as they say,

Trish: yes, I always say ignore it until you can't and if you can ignore it, try to rest.

Like please don't try to do all the things.

Okay.

So tell us how far into postpartum you are now.

Sarah: Yes, I'm seven weeks and already have begun, you know, mommy and baby yoga classes and going for daily walks, and I feel a lot better than I expected.

I don't know what to credit it to, but I think part of it was going in with very low expectations of.

What life would look like and I think yeah.

You know, going in, knowing So didn't put pressure on yourself.

Nothing.

I was like this.

Yeah.

At least for the first two weeks, my life is gonna revolve.

I wanted to exclusively breastfeed.

It's like my life will revolve around breastfeeding and that is going to be it.

So I love it.

Nothing else on my plate.

I think my husband, he struggled a bit more than me because I think he expected baby to be one more thing on his plate, but it was really, you know, he needed to have baby as the whole plate in terms of Yeah.

Of mindset.

Yeah.

And so I've.

Gotten through the initial hump of figuring out breastfeeding.

That's been the biggest challenge so far.

But I think really just have a great care team set up.

So definitely connect with a lactation consultant.

If you're planning on breastfeeding, do that prenatal appointment.

Yes.

See a pelvic floor therapist.

I think that was also something I got from, from your podcast was to see them Yes.

While still pregnant, so that you can To get a baseline.

Baseline.

Get the baseline.

Yeah.

Alert them as soon as you give birth because those appointments, at least where I'm from, can be very hard to schedule.

So I think that's

Trish: everywhere.

Mm-hmm.

Sarah: Like they're just so few of them and we need to get more, get more practicing.

But the getting that care team established, I also chose to, to encapsulate my placenta.

So that might have had some sort of positive impact.

Anecdotally for me, it did help in terms of, I didn't feel any crazy mood swings.

I was able to just.

Not cruise.

There was very challenging, but I was able to get to a place of where I feel like leaving the house was really nourishing instead of draining and just being able to, I love that.

Create those like one, once a day, get out of the house, get that burst of Oh, I feel like myself.

'cause I walk to the coffee shop 10 minutes away.

Yeah.

And then retreat, retreat back home.

But it's, it's been a really positive, positive experience and I'm very, very grateful for it.

Trish: I am so happy to hear your story.

It's so beautiful and I love that even with your postpartum, I feel like your real superpower is your mindset.

Thank you.

And I think you, you have so prepared yourself to accept the journey.

To not control the journey and to be on the journey instead of, I think a lot of us are so afraid from the things we've heard and it's, it's gonna be this way because, and shame on women who scare women.

Like I hate when I hear someone who's like, oh, I told my friends I was pregnant, and they're like, oh, just wait.

Like, instead of being like, yes.

You know, like, yeah, come on, let's not do that.

Like, let's stop that.

Yeah.

So before we get off, I would love for you to tell everyone, like, what is one word that you feel about your birth?

Like, how would you describe it?

One word?

Sarah: Say fulfilling.

Trish: I love that

Sarah: it was, I love that, you know, the birth of my dreams, birth of my dreams.

Part, it's amazing.

Part of it was to do to the nature side of it, of baby being healthy, mama being healthy, all the stars aligning in terms of me being able to have, so, you know, execute the birth clan that I, that I wanted.

Yeah.

But also fulfilling in the sense of, you know, this might be my only baby.

And you know, you have only one time at bat to get it right.

What it is.

You're what it is your Well, even with each baby.

Trish: Yeah, but even with each baby.

Yeah.

I say this all the time.

You only get one chance to birth with this baby.

But I don't know, Sarah, I don't know.

I'm not sure it's your only baby.

Ask my husband.

Yeah, we'll see.

I dunno.

We'll see.

We'll see.

Well, thank you so much for coming today and I'm so happy that I got to be a part of your journey and you tr I'm so proud of you.

Sarah: You did amazing.

Thank you.

Thank you.

You're so welcome.

Thank you for being the leader and the woman that you are and just really so giving with your love and your knowledge, it you're making a difference in the world.

Trish: Now she's gonna me up.

Well, thank you so much.

Okay.