Scott you writing Kurty b.

I am just I'm ready to laugh and laugh and laugh.

This one was posted on Instagram, but I mean it's so good an in depth we have to do it here.

It is very good.

Mule riding Kentucky man accused of unleashing raccoon and bar after being turned away.

There we go.

I mean, just we needed more words because who knows where we're going to ride that one off to.

Well, let's get into it on an animalistic brand new Bananas World.

Would you.

Resilient pieces, guys, gals, now binary pals.

Welcome to Bananas.

I'm Kirk Brown, older.

I and Banana boy number two Scotty Landis.

Thank you for listening to the silliest little podcast there ever was.

It's strange news, it's storytelling, it's great guests, and today we just check all three of those boxes off.

We sure do.

Baby, Why don't you bring her on?

I would love to our guest today was actually my first boss in Los Angeles, California.

She is a writer, comedian, an author, a podcaster, an actor, and now she's a cool mom.

She's on stand up tour.

You can go check her out on the Big Baby tour, and she loves animals more than people.

And she has a podcast you're probably already listening to called Good for You, Experts, comics, you name it.

She has them.

Welcome to the show, Our Bud Whitney Comings.

How are you?

Why is cool mom an insult?

But mom is fine?

No, I'd always say cool.

Kurt's a fun dad.

Fun dad, and cool mom.

That's cool for me.

That's so it's like, it's just cool mom.

It's like, don't worry.

She has someone helping her.

Don't worry she doesn't do the important things.

Have you heard of type sea moms?

No, what's that?

I just heard about them.

It's like a thing on TikTok where it's like, I don't really even know the description.

The description is like you used to be type A, but now you can like barely get anything done.

Uh, and so just like you know, vacuuming around toys and stuff.

But it definitely seems like the vibe is like I'm a type sea mom.

So at this point it's too late to learn my my my son's name.

I could have asked him years ago, but now it would just be.

Yeah, there is a little bit of like a brag culture of like, look, how bad a mom I am?

And I'm like, I'm like, careful, guys, your kid's going to turn into a comedian.

Like it's like, we don't need we don't need bragging about being now more than ever, we just need great parents to emerge and rise.

Yeah, or just like even if you are truly bad moms, hide it.

My mom would have been like, I'm an amazing mom, you know, like.

It's true.

Whitney, do you remember the first time you and I met?

Oh wow, Scotty, You're really You're really.

A part of my hippocampus that I have so deeply repressed.

It's interesting because so Bananas grew in a way, it grew and has become this podcast away because of we're on Karen Kilgarriff and Georgia hart Stark's network.

So my first job out here was Karen was the head writer on your show Love You Mean It, And I was the next hire that you and Robbie Anderson brought on.

So I got a calls in New York writing on finishing up a show.

Rob is already out in La work with you putting together that show, and he's like, do this packet.

Whitney's hiring like four writers right now.

So I did the pack I sent it in and he's like, you need to fly out Thursday.

And I was like, okay.

I thought he meant a week from then, but it was Wednesday.

So I flew out the next day.

He's like, you have to meet Whitney.

She's staffing this room right now and if you don't meet her, you will not get on this show.

So I said, okay.

So I fly to LA and I slept Rob's son, Charlie, I think was three or four years old at the time, So Charlie slept with the parents and then I slept in Charlie's boy size twin bed or single bed.

This is my second time in Los Angeles.

And that morning, at nine am, we went to your house and you had, you know, a few dogs running around, and I met you at the end of We're at your kitchen table, dining room table, real long table, and you're like scotti.

Rob says, you're a really great writer to yours favorite writer.

I go, that's true, and you just look at it.

You go, do you think I'm hot?

And I was so delirious from travel, I go you're the best I've ever seen, and you laughed so hard.

You go, he got it, he booked it, he booked the job.

He's hired, and that was my job interview.

Okay, well, it's been a pleasure working in show business.

And so funny.

You were just testing me.

It was a funny situation.

But I so here's the thing that I guess you can't really do that anymore.

But like back then, I was just like everyone was sending in all these packets, Like I was really good at writing jokes, but in a room I would kind of shut down, you know, Like I just think everybody's got different strengths.

And my thing was like I just want whoever's on these shows to like feel comfortable, to have fun, for us to have a good vibe, because no comedy can exist, no comedy can exist if everyone's scared.

Yah.

And I and I had been working on something before that where the showrunner like got off on making everyone scared of her or something, and all these brilliant writers were like not pitching because they were scared.

And I guess I just wanted to set the precedent that it's like I'm a silly goose we're just here to laugh, you know.

So I think, look, was that a date?

Yes, it was, No, I don't I don't remember saying like I think what I said to Rob was like anyone you recommend, I'm going to hire because he hates everyone and loves you and he's and I was like, I know I'm going to hire him.

I just want to make sure he's not scared of me or won't treat me like I'm above like I'm above him, you know, like I don't want to be anyone's boss.

It's the worst.

And so, uh so as soon as it was like, okay, you're comfortable, I want to make sure you know you can make fun of me because that's you know, so that's I'm you know, look that is I feel like that is a hate crime.

Whatever I did.

No, No, it was hilarious.

Also Rob was there and Eliza was there, so we had witness Oh yeah.

Okay, good.

I think it was just like like I was just the point where I'm like, I'm a comic because you know, there's this uh you know, brilliant I don't I won't say his name, but worked on Frasier.

Uh, this writer I love so much and he was with me on a TV show that I did, and he was talking about how comedians, you know, stand up comedians, improvisers, you know, we're like these like you know, silly, you know, goofballs, and then we get a TV show and then you have to be like a business person all of a sudden, he's like Eric Sicklin.

I'll say, he's like, you know, a comedian of.

The sitcom is like saying to a comedian, hey, le're hilarious on stage, now run a seven eleven, and like that's true.

That's so true.

And I just kind of was like, can we just for this talk show just like be in a room, because I came from the roast rooms where we would just make fun of each other and that's what the best work came from.

So I just was so sick of when I would walk by someone would like look scared, and I was like, dude, like I have six hundred thousand dollars of like debt right now, like I like, you know, I need, you know, And it just was like so odd that there's this thing where people are afraid of their boss, Like I just think that's such an insanely talk, especially as like our like it made no sense.

No, oh, I'm not accusing you of any level of workplace harassment.

It was so funny.

You were definitely doing it.

Just be like can this guy hang or not?

Ye?

Yeah, you caught me like on two hours of sleep in the child's bed, just being like, well, I'm gonna fire right back, because but it was like yeah.

It was also like you're like just looking in someone's eyes and going like, I mean Lauren Greenberg, I literally remember so Lauren Greenberg who went on to you know, Cordon.

You know, I think she still works with Cordon maybe in England.

She's hilarious.

She came in and she interviewed same job.

She her packet was like hilarious, Fine, she had brilliant tweets and I loved her tweets.

My friend Kevin Christy recommended her and she came in and like, funny's fine, But if you come into a room and you're scared or you know, you don't play well with others, like comedy can't happen and you know, And she came in and totally froze, and I identified with her because that's me.

I get nervous in front of authority.

Figures, especially at that time.

She was like sweating and I was like, so tell me about yourself, and she was just like in such a panic, and I was like, you know, I was like, I was like, I can't really tell if you want this job.

She starts sobbing.

She was like, she starts she starts sobbing, and she's like, my mom put me on match dot com.

Uh in is and is dming with men pretending to be me and I work at a work at a company that measures food to tell you how many calories something hasn't it And she just started like sobbing and it was and I was like, you're.

Hiring, like absolutely one of the great interview stories.

And Kurt, the company that she was working for, it was cups shaped like food, and then you would force that food into the ship plastic form shape.

So if you're like dairy, it was shaped like a wedge of cheese, so you'd be like, this is what's dairy you can have for the day.

And then the kid was like a camp set of like dishware basically, and you're like, here's my grains and it was just like shape in a circle, and it was like, here's my meat, and it was shaped like an old timey steak, like if you had to draw.

Like a like a like a Renaissance fair drumstick, like with like a cartoon.

But she she I was like, she's funny when she's crying, like she's hilarious, you know, And yeah.

She's really really funny.

Great, right, yeah, because it's just like looking at a bunch of written jokes like yeah, like you know, I don't really know what to do with that.

So well, yeah, and then Kurt, I wonder how we first met, probably like on at Midnight or something like that, or like in like Nerd.

I was gonna be like a nerd melt.

I've always been very intimidated by you, so I probably came off aloof no, no, yes, yes yet oh hey hey hey yes.

And over there I think, well, I remember meeting you.

The first time I had ever gone to your house was during that show that we did.

I think it was on Hulu.

It was like a stand up showcase in your backyard.

Yeah, that was remember that delight.

That was a delight because I hadn't done stand up in a while because it was like just coming out of like COVID and you were just so warm and welcoming.

I was just like, I like this person as.

I was giving you COVID.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I did get COVID.

You're like you kept hugging me.

Ygg was nose to mouth breathing.

Fine, that's fine, Kurt.

Do you want to tell us about this mule and raccoon man in Kentucky or whatever?

Sure?

Due, this is awesome.

This was It was sent in by a lot of people.

I recently saw it by Stephanie Zayats.

I think it was her first story sentence, Stephanie, good job mule writing.

Kentucky man accused of unleashing raccoon and bar after being turned away.

This was on Local twelve.

If it's local in about twelve, it's on Local twelve.

That's what.

That's right.

This was written by that swing in w KRC staff.

A Kentucky man.

Really wants to claim it.

We love when that happens.

A Kentucky man known by locals as Cowboy Cody, was taken into custody after he allegedly released a raccoon into a crowded bar on Friday.

Office responded at nine to eighteen pm after receiving a report of a disturbance.

Officers found Mason driving and initiated a traffic stop at the suspect allegedly refused to roll his window down or exit the vehicle, which promptly prompted officers to forcibly remove him.

Blah blah blah blah blah.

Here it is.

Mary Hafner, a bartender at the business involved in the incident, spoke to The New York Post, telling the publication that Mason had apparently quote trapped a raccoon earlier in the day on his farm, and he'd been carrying it around with him.

Quote.

I'm a bartender, so you know, I've seen some crazy stuff in my time, but nothing like this.

Hafner explained to the Post that Mason lives alone on a farm in the area and has caused trouble at local bars in the past.

She said Mason had already been drinking when he turned up at the bar that day, and was banned due to a previous incident involving a mule.

For the publication, I don't know what that means.

I love that.

Halfner told the Post that Mason had always liked her, so she attempted to convince him to leave he said to me, Oh, I see how it is this and a pretty face out here to distract me, adding that he initially appeared to comply with her request to leave.

According to the publication, Mason allegedly returned to the bar moments later with the raccoon and released it into the establishment.

Halfner told the publication another employee attempted to apprehend that raccoon by grabbing its tail and was constantly quit and bitten by the animal, which requires a raby shot.

Oh Hafner said she was able to corner the raccoon with a towel and safely return it outside where it fled.

Look, she said, I'm no city slicker, I'm a Kentucky girl.

I had no problem catching that thing.

W DKYTV reported in December.

This is a different incident.

This is the incident involving the mule that Mason had been arrested after turning up at Tap two one six already drinking and riding a mule.

The station's report states that Mason entered the bar and allegedly began whipping a bull whip and other patrons this guy has at acant troll.

Mason was asked to leave he refused, but was later arrested by responding officers.

Oh, in all the years she has known Mason, she has witnessed poor treatment and abused looks of his horses.

Oh, this is just that's not nice.

And Mason is now in jail.

Lock them up.

Okay, there we go.

Hold on, I haven't heard one thing you said since Cowboy Coyote.

So hold on.

Cowboy Cody, Cowboy Code?

Who is?

Like I have so many questions because it's like the the you know, the townspeople have come to known him as Cowboy Cody, Like I know he's been trying to make this nickname catch on for years.

Yeah, and no one's.

That you know, that one person who's always like, hey, Billy and everyone's like, it's Bill.

We're not You're not Billy.

We're not You're not You're not Spike.

Just you stop trying to make it.

You're not.

You can't make a nickname catch on as an adult.

Also, what a crazy nickname?

His name is Jonathan Mason and his nickname that he throws around his cowboy Cody.

Like yeah, and you know what this is.

This is totally like when no one thought it was weird that he did.

He changed his name every two years.

Yeah, and I was I was like, wait, now he's Sean COM's wait, he's puff Daddy.

Now no one finds us odd, like this guy changed his name for a reason.

Exactly Cowboy Cody's doing.

Cowboy.

Yeah, sure, Mason drove a mule into a bar, Cowboy Cody didn't.

I mean when I went to a bar, And I know I've mentioned this on the podcast before, but I was in Omaha, Nebraska with some friends and I was like the only one that wanted to go out and explore the underbelly of Omaha.

And I found a bar online that said Alpine in Home of the Wildlife.

So I was like, that is where I'm going, and I went, and I went with my buddy Blake, and we were watching a Huskers game and they're famous for the wings.

There was a woman with a beard frying wings and I'm not just exactly what I just said is one hundred percent accurate.

And when you're done with the wings, there their gimmick is you feed the leftover bones to a big group of raccoons that just wait.

Right outside the side door, there's a baby pool full of water and there are raccoons and you hand them the bones.

And there's also like feral cats in the area.

And so the home of the wildlife means at the Alpine Inn in Omaha, Nebraska, when you're done with your chicken wings, you hand them to raccoons.

It still exists.

It was incredible.

Blake was terrified the woman with the beard frying chicken wings.

Our bartender had never bartended before.

It was her first day, so if it was a draft beer, she nailed it.

But I need a little pick me up, so I ordered a Jack and coke and she did not know how to make that.

So the bearded woman came behind the bar and with flour from breading chicken wings, dipping wings in hot oil, she made my.

Jacket and touching, touching, Rabel.

Handed it to me with a finger in the Jack and coke and put it in front of me.

And I just looked at Blake and was like, Okay, is Jack Daniel strong enough to kill whatever just happened?

Yeah?

And am I brave enough to ask for another one?

So I just drank it.

I just drank a finger full of chicken spice At two pm, watching the huskerers at the Alpine in so shout out to the Alpine inn.

Oh, man, I want to go there so badly.

In quotes, it said home of the wildlife, and I'm like, well, I gotta go there.

Yeah.

Of course.

Is now a good time to let you guys know that I did have to get the montecrobl Antibodi's Raby's vaccine because I was attacked by a raccoon.

Huh oh is that true?

Oh my god?

He perfect time.

Well, well, so I was.

I live.

You know, Scotty's been to my new place.

I live kind of like in the woods.

And here's what I will say.

Now, raccoons.

We underestimate these little bastards.

They I believe they are the Orca whales of the alleyways.

They are.

They're colluding.

They're way smarter than we give them credit.

They have full on hands.

They have opposable thumbs.

The reason humans advanced is because we had a posable thumb.

So do raccoons.

They can turn hoses on and off.

They're unstoppable, frankly, and their body type does limit them greatly too.

But trust me too, But so I have like I'm fostering a dog at This isn't a couple of years ago, and I let them out in the middle night.

Puppies you have to let out in the middle of night, you know, Scotty, you just had.

A puppy, of course, and I feel like a scratch on the side of my leg.

I look at no, I'm not And I think at the time, I'm trying to think I definitely was maybe a Lunesta gal around this time.

See, you were on a vision quest sort.

Of, remember Lunesta.

I'm pretty sure they pulled it off the market real quick.

Exact.

I think it's whatever it is.

Roseanne has it in her pocket right now, and so so I kind of was like a little I don't take anything now, but I was like a little bit groggy, and I look down and there's a full on baby raccoon like hanging from my like pajama pants.

And then yeah, so it was so cute.

I know that was my reaction too.

And then the mom kind of like jumps on the.

Baby on your leg.

Yeah, And it didn't cut my skin or anything at the time.

Look, every now and then, I do make a good decision.

And as soon as the pandemic started, uh, I did start dating a veterinarian and.

Moved him into my home.

Too sweet.

You know, this wasn't a time where you like could not even go into a you cv like yeah, you know, yeah and so and I always have like a bleeding dog, you know, around me at some uh in some capacity.

So he comes downstairs and I'm like, uh, no big deal, we got to you know, just a raccoon ran up myle Like.

He's like, excuse me, And I was like, oh, yeah, it's no big deal, it's fine.

They ran up the tree.

He's like, no, we're.

Going to the hospital right this minute.

When he's like, we need to get the reccoon and cut its head off and figure, I know, I was like, uh raby, I don't think it has rabies.

It's fine.

And it seemed kind of scared of me actually, and it probably thought I had rabies.

And he's like, no, rabies, No one survives rabies.

That's like, isn't that he' razy?

And I was like, dude, there's no way I don't already have rabies.

This is probably just my why my personality is like this.

I'm I've been surviving rabies for the past twenty years.

Is like, is my like brand.

So he's like, you gotta go.

Not all hospitals have montacroble antibodies for rabies, Like, it's actually pretty hard to get.

We'd go to a couple of.

Them and as soon as you go in the first thing they say, it's like you got attacked by a bat like raccoon.

It's normally bats.

So I get the Monte grbl antibiotics.

You have to get it every other week for four weeks, and then like twenty three days later, there's there's no way this is true.

I'm sure they're just like making it up.

And I'm like a you know, test subject and so and then the.

Next day, this is what we're dealing with.

Okay, this is the.

Next real uh issue we all need to focus on.

Is the raccoons.

Because the raccoons the next day we.

Say raccoons so much.

My daughter calls them raccoons and I love it racon so much.

So the raccoon the next day is sleeping in my tree, the big mama.

And here's the deal.

They don't you don't see him.

During the day.

Okay, no one tells you this.

Here's here's the irony of raccoons.

Raccoons are squirrely.

Squirrels are not that squirrely, you can see them all day, but raccoons are.

So I'm like poking at it, and that's very odd like behavior for a room.

It's a sick raccoon.

That is like, something is wrong with this raccoon.

We got to get cut its hat off right now.

And I'm like, by the way, red flag didn't end up marrying this guy because he kept kept.

Saying we need to cut its hat off.

He could have just said we need to take it to animal control and let them handle it.

He just kept saying, this is.

By the way, a relationship previously ended because I was dating a doctor who a friend of mine dog was attacked by a coyote and the skin.

Was pulled off.

The dog did live, but I told him I was like, oh, my friend's dog just got attacked by a coyote and the skin came off, and he just said dead seriously went that's called a degloving.

Oh oh, yeah, that's a red flag.

I was like, goodbye.

So I call animal control in Los Angeles and say, hey, I've got a raccoon in the tree who's napping.

Weird behavior, and the girl goes yeah, well, if it's up in the tree, that's where they live.

I was like, okay, no, this is.

Is where I live first of all, and she goes, well, a lot of the wild animals right now, especially the raccoons, are acting weird because people test their cocaine for fentanyl, and when it tests positive, they flush it down the drain, So some of them have fentanyl in their system.

Are you are you kidding me?

This was said to me, and then the oh, I'm so sorry the raccoon is on I know this by a person talking to me on the phone.

Your raccoon that you're talking about is on fentanyl from toilet.

Now, this is like a common problem in California.

Was like she just said a very matter of fact, like people are flushing their cocaine and.

So there's only a few ways to just prolf that approove.

This feels the story you're telling me on the Great Bananas Podcast is actually one of the most.

Sort of tame raccoon stories I've heard in a while.

Oh, I love well.

And of course the Kentucky Bartender also, that's a kind of a good name for a TV show too, just called Kentucky Bartender.

Oh my God, it's a good idea.

A woman that just sees you just never know what's coming through the door.

It's it's the new Cheers, It's the new I got one for y'all.

This was sent in by Sarah Fainter.

You can send your stories into the Bananas Podcast.

So did you say Sarah Painter with a P.

It's p F, so it's like Fainter, PF Fainter.

So I went to school with the girl I think about her once a week named Jenny Painter, and she her I think it was her mom remarried and a guy whose last name was Wall.

And it's so stupid and Jenny Painter Wall.

I know, it's so it's so dumb, but it was like one of the you know when you're in high school, like anything that can get you bullied is like brutal.

And it was just like, oh, she's like I was so close to.

And then her mom got anyway, Jenny.

Painter wall Is, I mean that's my last name.

My last name is Cummings.

I have sympathy for nobody.

Mine's brown Owler but with an H, so it looks like brown Holer.

Okay, that's okay, Yours might be worse.

We can never get married.

Yeah in companies brown holeer.

Yeah, that's a different that's that's a TV series too.

Just on a later.

Robot babies brought to schools actually increased teenage pregnancies, according to a new study.

Crazy wait what so this is written by the best in the biz Regina titleus or T T Tellius.

Let's go to Tellius all right with to Tellius?

This is interesting.

This was on study fines.

A school education program or high school girls cared for robot babies in a bid to reduce teenage pregnancies has failed, according to new w a research.

I think this is in Australia.

I'll figure it out.

The study, conducted by a Telethon Kids Institute, which sounds so fair.

Telethon Kids Institute, that's who've conducted Australia.

You never love.

In Lancet on Friday, found that rather than reduced pregnancy rates among teenagers, it actually increased the occurrence of teenage pregnancies.

Of the nearly three thousand WA schoolgirls aged thirteen to fifteen from fifty seven public and independent schools.

They took part in the trial to assess VIP virtual infant excuse me virtual infant parenting, which is very popular among schools throughout Australia at the time and is still widely used overseas.

About half of the students who were in the intervention group were given lifelike babies for a weekend, while other girls who were in the control group were given the standard health education curriculum.

So one got robot babies.

Why I have about this.

The robot babies or infant simulators reflected the behavior of six week old babies.

So that's pretty young.

That's a little baby, sustained crying.

Researchers who tracked the girls until they turned twenty years old found that the girls who did the VIP program, which is just so ironic, who did the VIP program with the robot babies, had a seventeen percent rate of pregnancy compared to eleven percent for the girls who took standard health education.

The studies also found there were fewer abortions by teenagers who took part in the VIP program fifty three percent compared to sixty percent in the other group.

The studies lead investigator, these.

Are such small numbers though, like six percent difference.

It's a six percent difference, it's not really.

Yeah, you know, yeah, it's not it's not absolute groundbreaking.

Doctor Sally Brinkman said the program was stopped as soon as the initial results indicated the program was failing, which is so funny, but also right, pull the plug.

If it's not work, it's not working.

But doctor Brinkman said it had taken until now to finalize all the search results.

This is the largest study of its kind and highlights that even the most well intentioned programs can have unexpected consequences.

I bet you they were too lifelike.

That's what that's my guess is they were too life like.

Their causing oxytocin hormones to be released in the girls, and then they were like then they ended up being more fertile.

So I bet it's interesting.

It was.

Oh, that's an interesting point of view.

She said.

Some schools in Australia are still doing the program, and doctor Brinkman said some students with who had the robot babies came so attached to their babies that they even experienced emotional trauma when they had to hand them back.

She said, many it's a crazy thing to This is a crazy plan.

Yeah, can I just I'm sorry.

I don't know.

I can we stop studying kids?

Please?

Does anyone that can?

No one needs to study kids?

Can we stop?

Who are these weirdos?

By the way, they never have their own kids that are like, by the way, study your kids.

If you have kids at home, just watch do this to them.

Then I got you a robot.

First of all, you.

There's no way to ascertain any kind of results from a study of kids that were in a study because they're already in some kind of abusive home that their.

Parents brought them to a study for fifty dollars cash.

So there's no there's.

No way of knowing these kids were already momstionally traumatized.

This is and also as someone I used to do studies for money when I first moved to Los Angeles, I study right for cash, and like there's really no way of ascertaining any of this, Like, I mean, what is this?

What was that?

The Kids Study Council of America?

Can we find out kids telethon telethon?

What kids Kids Institute?

The TKI program?

Can we keep scientists?

How do we make these young girls fertile with real babies, like are with robot babies?

Like this is just when someone's like king, they have to go so far as to become a become a scientist and then put on all these fake studies just to watch kids.

You know.

It's just like their program do the reverse.

So I'm gonna look that up before people try drugs more.

Yes, I mean, I definitely remember seeing it was like a it was a video that was like puppets, and I remember them saying all sorts of things about different drugs, and I was like, whoa, look at all the different drugs we could try.

Pretty well.

That's, by the way, that's a big thing in rehab.

When people go to rehab for the first time.

When they get out, they end up relapsing so much harder because they hear about all these other drugs and rehab that they didn't even.

They're like, wait, zandi bars.

Yeah, So I mean studies, it's like I feel like, you know, I have no faith in any of them anymore.

And the thing that broke me was the food Pyramid.

When I found out it.

Was yes, it was made by this.

It was like what was the grain industry?

Yeah, but it was like the cereal company.

It was like General Mills.

That's why it was like you gotta eat.

You gotta be eating so much cereal.

Whenever I see it was like it was like a ton of bread and like a fish with an eyeball, and then it's like cereal.

So like now what I see any study, I'm like, who benefits from this study?

Like who is this?

Like, no, no one does know.

The selling robot babies benefit.

This was created by robot babies to be held.

Somebody didn't know what to do with all their robot babies.

By the way, can we have no kids hold babies at all?

Like for a million reasons, Like whenever I see a kid with like like a four year old with a stroller and a baby doll, I'm just like, guys.

Like it is weird, is odd, and it's one of those things that's so common that we're used to it, but it is sort of a strange little thing.

Yeah, bizarre.

Did you have it in your high school?

We had no We had flower babies, like a pound bag of white flower that you couldn't let break or whatever, and you'd coupled Mine was Jen brown, and you would like pass this baby for two weeks in the hallway and hope it didn't start spilling.

Out flower.

Yeah, this is I'm called.

I will call child services, I will pass, I will actually dedicate my life.

There's a couple of things that I need im.

Like, but also not only that, like the prom, Like that's the other thing I can't get over.

I did it.

It's like for a year, you guys decide who you're gonna dry hump in six months and all the teachers are gonna come watch.

Like there's some of these things, some things we do in school.

Why were you and why were you and Jen Brown raising a fake baby together?

Why even you know have that we did one?

I don't know if it was the same exercise, but I do remember, like carrying an egg around like in a spoon.

I love to hear about this because I went to an all boys school and they didn't teach just shit about being a parent, none of it.

What we didn't even learn about what sex was.

Yeah, that's right.

But I mean it's like, yeah, I mean a lot of my friends I went to school in Virginia, like friends had kids, as you know, juniors and seniors, and then they're holding their carrying.

Around the flower, Like can I take this home to cook for my family?

Like I have a.

Kid, they're going to make a pancakes tomorrow.

Uh, there was a in our in Baltimore County there one of our high school's had a daycare in the high school.

Yeah.

Yeah, so I guess maybe I guess if you're in an area where it's like, look, we know these kids like that there's no birth control or like you know, it's like Christian school or something like yeah, like we know you're going to have a kid early, we might as well start teaching you.

But I don't I love that people like like schools like have all these like weird like who decides this some male principle is like we're going to have these like you know, thirteen year olds pretend their parents Like I don't know, I don't know who decides all this stuff.

But also I had a revelation recently.

Who becomes a principal?

What kind of loser?

What kind of dorm is like pick on someone your own size?

Like the that's right, I imagine kingdom of children.

Yeah, it's just like how much of a loser me?

That's how you're you feel powerful?

Do you feel powerful?

Now?

Said before about like comics having to run a seven eleven it's like teachers suddenly have to run a bank.

Yeah, and so principals are like it's all just administrative stuff and it's like you're an HR person, You're you're an accountant.

It just seems like it's funny, like schools are so wild, Like especially when you become a parent, you're kind of like, wait, these are just like flawed humans that are running a school because you're sort of like, oh, wait, the soccer coach teaches history now, like since when, like you're like, they're all none of them are qualified for anything, Like, wait, my friend's dad is just the gymnastics coach now because she's on the team.

When I was a freshman, aren't my soccer coach put in a dip every single practice?

He was just sitting in a dip bottle the entire soccer practice.

And you know, you look back and I was fourteen, probably fourteen, and so he was probably twenty four, so he was ten years older.

Oh yeah, he would show up and we were pretty good, but yeah, he would pack a dip.

But during practice it.

Was like hot days, hot days.

Yeah, it's August and Maryland.

A hot day, dip.

We were losing a game.

That we should have been winning to Towson High School, and I at halftime said, I was like, you know, get your fucking heads in the game to like my own teammates, and that coach goes Landis, I think your ball's just dropped.

Just a twenty four year old with a dip so salty coach Landis, I think your ball's finally dropped.

And I'm like, you know what.

There's always like the moment where you realize one of your coaches like isn't a parent at the school, or like they don't have kids at the school, and You're like.

How did you even get in this job?

Yeah, like why are you?

Why are you a twenty five year old like a hot guy who's like my volleyball coach, Like I'm fourteen, Like who are you?

It's just like so weird.

I had a lacrosse coach who would always end every thought with like a racehorse, and so it would be like that guy's running like a racehorse and you're like okay, and he's like, hey's shooting like a race horse.

And he's like he's got to peel like a piss like a race horse.

And I'm like, you can't just put like a racehorse on the end of anything one of the players is doing.

Man, he hit that guy like a race horse.

But I'm still thinking about him twenty five years later.

Isn't it weird when you grow up in all these things, like like where was I the other day?

And I was like it was I was in San Diego and my son was going in the pool and we had just eat and I was like, hold on you guys, like by the way, like literally forty two years old, I was like, we just ate.

We can't go in the pool yet?

Is that true?

Is that no?

That's oh no, yeah.

Well I think it was like our parents needed a break and they just made up a lie, you know, Like so there's so it's like when you realize, like my mom told me that when the ice cream truck played music, that manut was out of ice cream, like a diabolical Yeah.

Like the things you look back and you're like, oh, like when those certain things get shattered.

Yes, my friend's dad and Ocean City Maryland said, whenever you see a seagull floating on the water, there is a shark directly beneath it, and that seagulls float over sharks and then they eat whatever the sharks don't finish.

And so we would look out and there'd be seagulls floating on the waves, and we wouldn't get in the water.

And one time I dove the waving came up and there was a seagull sitting there and I was like, well, it's been a great run.

I've had a wonderful eight years on planet Earth.

Oh but total why And it's just like, yeah, why not?

We need a break.

Every parent needs to exhale sometimes.

Brilliant Mary McCormick actress, she was walking in down the ocean with her three kids in they're like one of the ocean.

She's like, honey, the ocean's broken.

We kids, you know.

Like just the things you say, Yeah, the things you.

Say, kurty b you want to tease me into some thumbs ups.

A photographer in Canada found a toad with its eyes inside its mouth and scientists are baffled.

It's very crazy looking.

My eyes are down here.

Kyle Richard wants to thumb up.

Oh, he says, remember Meghan, who got the big promotion and we probably do well.

She quit that job to save for sanity.

She took a year long sabbatical, did a ton of volunteer work, and she is now the newest restoration project manager for a coast Salas tribe in Washington State where they're saving salmon and sea life in the Puget Sound.

So thumbs up to Megan, you did it.

That seems like a great job.

Chelsea says, I want to thumbs up the bananamal who created these Tampa Bay Burbs coloring book.

I ended up needing emergency spinal surgery and found myself with two weeks of inpatient rehab after over a week in the hospital, so she ordered these Tampa Bay Burbs.

Thank you, Kurt Scottie for the wonderful Bernaner's community.

And so, Kurt, if you do recall that we have a bananimal name Angelique Cologne, who beat cancer and while she was getting an immunotherapy treatment, I think she was just staring out the window at birds because there was nothing else she could do.

Nobody could visit her.

Her immune system was vulnerable, so she came up with a coloring book of all the birds she was seeing in the Tampa Bay area.

It's on Amazon.

I have a copy and go get these Tampa Bay Burbs.

If you want a kid's color and a color book, it's beautiful.

I love the name as well.

Delight.

Yeah.

So good job Angelique, and good job Chelsea.

I'll give one more.

Oh, this is a fun this is a fun one.

Jennifer Schmidt, who's a great bananimals come to Bananas Fest and live shows, is thumbing up her best friend, Betsy.

Betsy had a nine year running streak where she ran three miles every single day for nine years.

But Betsy had to have surgery, so that streak was coming to an end.

She was very sad about it ending, so she and her friends came up with a plan.

Betsy and four women ran naked through a neighborhood at nine pm to celebrate the end of Betsy's impressive streak.

Thumbs up to Betsy.

Just start a new streak, start over.

That's awesome.

Run four miles every day?

Who knows?

And of course we are here with the fantastic, the legendary Whitney Cummings.

Whitney, thanks for being here, Thanks for having me.

Do you love doing your podcast?

What you seem to really love?

Good for you.

That's so nice.

I think it took me a second to like figure out, you know, how to not like finish it and be consumed with shame for truly.

Days because I just mean, like.

As comics, as writers, like you know, like you know, I like writing something, making it good and then putting it out.

Yeah.

Yeah, And sometimes on a podcast, I'm like, am I just like bombing for two hours?

Like it's just you know, and there's no audience obviously, and we're kind of conditioned.

We're kind of conditioned, you know, for that.

And I'm sort of like everyone does something so different and we're all these sort of like you know, Lois and Clark in it out here, like not clear what what the blueprint is, you know, because it's like everyone has a short attention span you're supposed to.

And then it's like, but some podcasts that are really bigger three and a half hours, you know, so it's hard to tell.

And yeah, and you're kind of just like yelling into a.

Void and you're like, I don't even know if people are are they are they driving listening to this?

Are they watching it?

Are they at work?

Like I just for a long time, I just got overwhelmed with just thinking I suck at this and then I look at some of the biggest podcasts and it's just a bunch of comedians, like like millionaire comedians complaining about how depressed they.

Are and what the hell about it whatsoever?

I don't I don't know what you guys want.

I don't get it.

This is mad, you know.

So I also then I guests is so all consuming, and it's just like having a well because then you have a guest on and then I always want to talk about like in Sunday stuff that's going to let you know, and then you know, we'll have this a great moments and then they'll leave and their publicist or whatever like can you cut that out?

Can you cut that?

And I'm like, you want to They want to cut out all the funny stuff.

So it's just me being like, so how did you get into acting?

Who cares?

And so I was.

Just like and then someone comes and does your podcast for free, and then you don't want to be like you know, you kind of just like throw them softballs.

But then they have they have their own podcast too, So it became this like jury duty where I have to do yours and you have to do mine, and we're all just like like avoiding each other in the hallway at the comedy so like please don't ask it, Like.

So now I just do it myself.

It's kind of just me, just like rambling and ranting about stuff.

And that's been way sort of more less like stressful because if it doesn't go well or I know what happened, you.

Know, I wanted Kurt and I and we still might do this.

We have a Patreon now so we can kind of expand and do different things outside of this normal bananas format.

I wanted to do like time specific banana like I did want to do like a four hour marathon of bananas where we've cycled in several guests, just so somebody was like, I'm we should a huge road trip.

We should do that as a live stream.

Oh that would be interesting, basically absolute marathon EPP where people could be like, you know what, I have a I'm going for a dental procedure that's going to take three hours and I want to just listen to one thing the whole time.

But also I bet you tho of the pop before I do want to do a one off colonoscopy prep cleanse where it's like and so begins what we're about.

We're drinking the prep now and there we have twenty minutes until hell breaks loose and then just walk our listeners who are going to get colonies through it with bananas as their shaman as their guide.

I love that we should do it all right here it is final Final Story, Baby.

Final Story brings it home.

Curdie b.

Sent in by Megan all oliverson Ellervison.

Okay, a photographer in Canada found a toad with eyes in its mouth and side be baffled.

This was in the Travel It's just called the Travel Scotti.

How often are you reading the Travel.

Man, I would say on a daily basis twenty four hours in a day.

I'm probably reading the Travel between twelve and fifteen times a day, a front to back the whole website.

M This was written by Savannah Stanfield, who a lot of people say is the best in the biz.

Best in the biz.

The planet is full of strange and unusual animals that you wouldn't believe has existed.

From the bizarre lipstick wearing fish that can't swim what and the world's most unusual bright pink dolphin.

I've seen those, yeah, I seen those all of.

These animals are naturally quirky, but some animals look weird accidentally.

This was the case of a certain toad.

Photographer and Canada found a toad with eyes in its mouth, a discovery which baffled scientists at the time.

But what's even more astounding is the fact that this is a lot more common in amphibians like toads than you might think.

Why did this toad have my eyes inside its mouth?

The story fascinating one.

In nineteen ninety two, a photographer named Scott Gardner was in Burlington County, Ontario, Canada, working for the Hamilton Spectator.

Gardner received a call about a toad with eyes in its mouth.

He was curious to check it out, even a small part of him thought it might be a prank.

Nevertheless, Gardner went to the family's backyard where the toad was found, and sure enough, there was a toad that lacked eye sockets, and instead the toad's eyes were just inside its mouth.

Okay.

Gardener captured a photo of the toad and it was published in the Hamilton Spectator.

It quickly circulated throughout Canada in the United States, and was featured in notable works including climbing Mount Improbable by Richard Dawkins.

The photograph was also featured in several showcases blah blah blah.

Even today, the image still circulates on social media, leaving people wondering if it's real.

It is actually these days it's so hard to say what's real and what.

Isn't it really is this is so?

I looked on Snopes, this is real.

Well, I looked on Alex I looked on Alex Jones.

Well there's something too things okay, so isn't there And I again, I don't know if this is a legitimate study or done by leg creeps that just wanted to look at frogs carry around baby frogs and robot baby frogs.

But that that round up, which is the chemical that we use, Like, doesn't that cause like they were finding that it was affecting frogs like in a lot of different ways.

So it seems like frogs are getting the brunt of a lot of our chemicals.

It's also in our breast milt too, which is the reason I say I didn't breastfeed, not because I have fake boobs and couldn't and put.

That above my child's health.

Also, we don't know we haven't looked in every frog's mouth, I like, do you know what I mean?

There's certain things like this.

This is the only frog we have.

I personally haven't even looked at one.

And why did you even look in this one?

What is this guy doing?

He's cute though, I think he's cute.

That photo is kind of charming.

He looks like an animated character that you know when he yawns, he can finally see what's going on, and then he just goes about his day.

And he looks like he's always saying, hey, that's bigger than me.

That's how he can see is if.

What he's like?

Wait, what is it?

Oh god?

Is it rocky horror?

I can't remember.

Oh no, maybe beetlejuice where they took the eyeballs and put him in.

Yeah, this is his party trig.

Yes, this is okay.

So here's the reason.

Do you guys want to hear?

It's a maculum macro mutation of frogs and toads.

They think it's likely result of a parasitic infection from a trematode, which has been known to cause limb mutations in amphibians.

Interesting, Yeah, so there it is.

It's not it doesn't sound like it's round up.

It sounds like trematode, whatever that is.

I know.

Whitney has told me on several occasions that she actually really loves our Instagram.

It is her favorite news.

Yes, it's my it's the.

Only way, it's the only news.

I all the news that fit to print.

Yes, And I feel like there was a story that Lisa are our real uh part time employee, part time full human, not spot intern.

She posted when I think that was a tadpole that just never turned into a frog.

So it just got fucking huge.

This tadpole was like as big as a football and it just never the legs never came.

So I was like, that seems like the Pixar movie that everybody is clamoring for the tadpole that never became.

Like that, like like boss Baby, Yes, it's.

Boss Baby, tadpole in a bond.

That is so good, Whitney.

Anything you want to plug away your tour?

Anything?

Where can people find you?

No?

Just you guys.

I love you, guys.

Thanks for having me.

I'm like such a fan.

I hope I was okay?

And did you get in the way?

Are you kidding me?

You were wonderful.

But I always feel like at a show like this that's so successful, I don't think anyone's listening for the guests.

They're just listening for like if the guest brings out something else and other in their favorite their best friends, you know.

So I don't want to get in the way.

I think that truth to that.

And also, your fans are always the best people.

They're very nice people, they're very kind, they're very wholesome, and they're very optimistic, which is so rare these days.

We love the bananamalsh Wit.

Thanks for coming on.

I'll see you soon.

Thanks for not making me talk about politics.

Love you, bye, never Bye.

Bana.

Bananas is an exactly right media production.

Our producer and engineer is Katie Levine.

The catchy Bananas theme song was composed and performed by Kahan.

Artwork for Bananas was designed by Travis Millard.

And our benevolent overlords are the great Karen Kilgareff and Georgia Hartstart.

And Lisa Maggott is our full human, not a robot, part time employee.

You can listen to Bananas on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts, and please feel free to rate and review as many times as you can.

We love those five stars.

Mm hmm