Jennifer Aniston posted on Instagram happy Birthday, my love or something to that effect about her new boyfriend Jim Curtis, who I did date years ago and was on this podcast saying that I'm rooting for them.

It was in the very beginning, and I said, I have a feeling this is going the distance because his essence and his vibe match with hers.

And I really believe in alignment and timing, and this dating concept that I have been exploring is about alignment.

It's not about what's his net worth and is he an actor?

And is he five nine and does he have.

You know, a big washboard abs and a.

Big chest or whatever anyone looks for.

It's about alignment and having spent some time with him and getting to know him briefly, not you know, it wasn't a serious relationship by any means.

It was dating.

I heard that they were together, and I was like, that tracks based on my sense about her.

How she dresses, how she always has the same hairstyle.

She doesn't have something to prove.

She's not out there trying to be something that Hollywood or America wants.

She doesn't feel the need to over explain why she has her has and have kids or marriages, and I just immediately thought, oh my god, this thing is going to go the distance, which I still believe.

So I saw that post and it reinforced that and I was like, yes, I think they're going to go the distance.

And it also made me realize that society and the media is constantly saying about women, not men.

She can't hold a man, or get under a man, to get over another, or all her relationships or failed relationships, all these things, right, they don't really say that about men.

They'll talk about Leo going out with someone who's thirty years younger than him at all times.

But that's more of like a pattern, and it speaks to a greater a greater like a greater dynamic and pattern about men and dating younger women.

And why or Bill Belichick, it's not about it's not a blanket statement that they're always saying about men, and women always get that, like she can't hold the man, what if she didn't want to hold the man?

What if she was the wrong man?

What if this is the right man?

Like it's what if it's just alignment?

Now?

You know?

What if she had to kiss a lot of frogs, including Brad Pitt to get to her prints.

Like what if one person's dream justin thrower Brad Pitt is is somebody else's nightmare, Like what if this is just her forever guy?

I just think it is.

I just I can feel it like a witch, like I'm a like.

I literally have like a tent and I'm reading fortunes.

I just feel it.

I think this is her forever guy.

I I don't think in six months it's gonna be like they broke up.

I just don't.

He's very chill, but yet has a good sense of humor, is good looking, is smart and spiritual.

But I remember he's very Che's got a chill vibe about him.

I don't know.

He seems like he could take a back seat.

I like it.

I love it.

I don't love it.

I don't like it.

I love it anyway.

It has nothing to do with me, and it has nothing to do with clickbait.

What it does have to do with is if you want to find someone and your discouraged, and you're wondering why it keeps failing, why you keep going out the wrong guy, why your picker is off, why you can't keep a man either it only has to happen once.

So it's not I'm.

Not talking about this for clickbait fodder.

I'm talking about this for what it means.

It means she has been criticized and scrutinized, and she what I believe, and she has what I believe to be found her match life match.

And there are people in my comment saying they don't even like her and they're happy for her.

I don't like her.

I don't not like her, I don't know her.

I just am happy for her.

I am we're close in age.

I haven't gotten it right.

I've had many serious relationships.

I have no problem meeting men, I have no problem landing men.

I have no problem getting meant to want to marry me.

That has nothing to do with finding the right person and choosing the right person for the right reasons.

And I strongly believe in the pendulum theory.

So it's not a theory that anyone's ever said before me, but what I call the pendulum theory in dating is you go through an experience in a relationship and you then go choose the opposite of it, or you react to it in some way.

So I was in a relationship where I was the moneyed spouse and I was taken advantage of and I was stolen from, and I was abused, and I was tortured, and I was stalked, and I was harassed, and I was followed, and I was defrauded and I was plagiarized.

And after that experience, I went for someone who said they were going to save me, like they were going to be my prince charming, they were going to treat me so incredibly well, and I went for it.

And this person had another set of problems that were very deep and very serious, and I wanted to believe they were going to save me.

Quickly, thereafter I realized that they were never going to save me.

They couldn't even save themselves.

I just wanted to believe that.

And then that was so chaotic that after that I went for a warm blanket, someone that was going to take care of me, make me feel taken care of, like they would never steal from me, like they would just.

Take care of me.

And there were many, many circumstances that led to that relationship being wrong.

But after that relationship, I did the work.

I took the time, and I took almost a year to be celibate and not date, to get the pendulum back in the middle and not have it be a seesaw where like you're with one person.

Let's say it was someone who cheated on you.

Then you was someone who may not even have a pulse, but you know they're not going to cheat on you.

That doesn't mean you're supposed to be with them just because they won't cheat on you.

Say you're with someone who stole from you, or it was broke and it was a very bad experience.

Because they were broke, it doesn't mean the next person has to be rich.

It means you have to fucking level out.

And I get the sense that Jennifer Aniston leveled the fuck out.

She wasn't like reacting to Brad Pitt or Justin Throw or this, or making the same mistakes over and over.

Her best friend Ellen is.

The one that said to me, you will keep making a bit, You will keep making the same mistake until you learn the lesson.

And so I presume, not knowing her at all, that at a certain age and after so many mistakes, you're going to sit tight and just be like I, I can't make a good fucking.

Decision as it pertains to relationship.

So let me take a seat and then let me not move out of this chair until there's something to move for.

And it's a reaction to something else.

It's just the baseline of who I am and what I want and what I need.

I am trying to navigate that myself now.

I am dating.

I met a lot of different types of people, and some are certain about me.

They are absolutely certain that I'm their person.

Absolutely certain.

That doesn't mean I'm certain.

It means I'm exploring it.

The old me went to the person.

I have never really been the chooser.

I'm always the chosen.

I get chosen.

I get intoxicated by it.

I lean into it.

I go hard for it, because it's so intoxicating to be loved, particularly if you grew up not being loved in the right way, being traumatized, being left, being abandoned, Like you're gonna lean into that.

But that's not the sole reason to be If someone is how much they love you, it's a great reason.

It's a factor you don't want someone who doesn't love you.

It's not the reason.

When it comes to dating and relationships.

It's go time or no time.

You're not sitting around and waiting for someone to step up to the plate.

If they're not at the plate when you see them, that's it.

Someone has to be primed, moved up, and ready to fucking go.

That's it.

It's go time or no time.

It's not the idea of something or eventually they'll get there or subconsciously you're going to convince them, or you're gonna make them know how great you are, and then they're going to change what they say, particularly with men, but really with men, men know what the fuck they want and where they stand.

They're not waffling and they're not changing.

You're not going to look hot, smell good and convince them of something that they don't want to do.

That's not going to happen.

That's not how they operate.

If they do operate that way, it's not based in truth, and they will fall back to where they were.

It's go time or no time.

They're ready, or discard them, that's it.

If you're looking for a real relationship, the person that the man that you want is a man who's also looking for a real relationship.

He is primed and ready.

He is a blobed up, based up glossy turkey ready to be put in the fucking oven.

That's it.

Do not try to make a dog a cat.

Do not try to get someone ready to be with you.

Do not try to convince someone.

Do not try to sexualize someone into it to.

Look hot enough.

They will lean into it, and then they will run away and.

Come back to center.

They will not.

If your dating have updated photos, that is it.

What do you think you're gonna do?

Post a picture that it does not look like you, and you're gonna show up and what are you gonna do?

Jedi mind fuck someone into thinking you look like that picture.

Get your life together.

Ask your friends if your picture looks like you have.

I once went out with a former assistance young girl and her friends.

I looked at all three of their dating profiles and their pictures, and I was like, this doesn't look like your fucking neighbor.

What are you trying to convey?

Also, like, why are you in a.

Picture with your mother?

Why are you in a picture with your best friend is hotter than you?

Why are there four girls in your photo?

No one knows who they're even looking at, Like what are you doing?

Like?

Why are you in every single picture?

In a hot dress, Like, do you do anything else besides wear hot dresses?

Do you do you do sports?

Like people are clueless.

But the worst defense is the picture doesn't look like you.

We have this dating concept and one woman the two pictures don't look like the same person.

Will the real person please stand up?

They did not look like the same person.

I had no idea who I was looking at.

I I got scalped.

How's that?

Let me tell you something.

This is a PPA.

It is a public ponytail announcement, and I'm putting up dues in with ponytails.

Okay, I've been on a hair journey.

I've been using serums.

I've been taking supplements.

I went to a place where they like, do something in zap your skull.

I'm in the fucking game now, Okay, I'm doing it.

And I was getting my hair done the other day and my hairdresser said, you know, you have a big bald spot in the back of your head.

What do you think that that's a sentence that anybody wants to hear, not to mention right before turning fifty five years old?

Like I was like what?

And I got scared, like it was real?

And he was like, no, something pulled and I looked at it, like you could see the follicle.

Something had been ripped from my skull, and what was it.

It was a ponytail.

It was a ponytail, a tight, high ponytail.

And everyone said to me, Courtney Kardashian went through that.

I don't remember when it was and I didn't see her episode, and I don't watch that show, but people just said it happened to her and it must have been traumatizing.

She put it on her show.

I'm not traumatized, but like, I don't really want a hole in the back of my head, Like I've been scalped, and if you touch my head, it feels like there's a hole in there, Like it feels like there's like a divot.

You could you could like golf off the top of my head.

You could put a golf ball in this hole.

Like a whole patch of my skull was ripped off.

It's insane.

So now I'm not only on an overall haircare journey, but I'm trying to like rejuvenate a specific part of my scalp.

What a fucking disaster.

What a disaster?

Uh, one more thing, you cannot go backwards.

If you are thinking about your ex, fantasizing about your ex, comparing the person you're with about your ex, stop right now.

It's a discipline, it's a slap on your hand, it's a shut the fuck up.

It's a cleanse, it's a touching story.

You are not going back.

You're not fantasizing about going back.

If the person you were with before wanted you, they would be at your doorstep.

You're not selling yourself.

You're not convincing yourself.

You're not negotiating.

You're not going backwards.

You're you're remembering only the good.

You are cherry picking, you are glossing over.

You are they call it like a cloud or something.

There's something that you do.

You're like, you are gaslighting yourself.

You're not going backwards, no matter what, no matter how no matter how handsome he was, no matter how good he was in bed, no matter how good looking he was, You're not going backwards.

Another thing I want to ask you, guys.

I really want to ask you guys.

Now I talk to my shrink about this.

It cannot be in a vacuum.

I want to know how important sex is.

I want to know how important good sex is great sexes and excellent sexes because I I don't think it can be taught.

I think it can be improved, I think it can be communicated.

I don't think it can be taught.

And I want to know if amazing sex is happening, what percentage of the equation is that.

If someone can open your body up to have the best sex of your life, what does that mean?

Message us, let me know.