Hello, Hello, what's up, Michelby Toe, what's up?

Jordan Corlos?

Oh my god, I'm so sorry.

We gotta do it again.

Hey everyone, this is adulting.

By the way, Thank you so much for checking it.

Listen, I was talking about you the other day, only good things, of course, because you know me, I'm gonna say it to your face.

And my friend goes, why do you always say Jordan's last name when you talk about him?

I was like, Jordan Carlos.

Because it's a fun name.

You have a fun name too, you know, Michellete, I think it's.

Really fun to say last names.

I think nicknames are really fun.

And I'm just like, but there's other Jordan's.

And she's like, ohh, I'm like sparked, like I couldn't even like there's other Jordans.

And it's such a great name where it's like you could be any gender identity and still have this cool fucking name and that's dope, thank you.

You know, like the one time I went to Aspen, it was just a bunch of little, rich white kids named Taylor.

Oh yeah, Taylor, Bryce, Tate Musket.

You know what, Listen, I know I know my worth, I know my name my name is fun because it's like it's like a Wan Pablo, you know what I'm saying.

It's just like, yes, Jordan Carlos, you know, yes, the emphasis can be on the second name.

You know what I'm saying, Carlos.

Yeah, But like if you had a middle name that you use all the time, I think it would ruin it because it would just be giving ninety sitcom actor, Like it'd be too many things for us to like really try to separate you from the path.

You know what I mean.

Jonathan Taylor Thomas, is that what you're saying?

So many like all of them?

Yeah, like do the work.

I think if I had my brothers, which I do, I could actually take my mother's last name and do that nineties actor thing because that's Jordan Carlos Nelson.

I mean, Jordan Carlos.

Come on, Yeah, that's giving like a day player on Stave by the Bell and giving Erkele's best friend for a three episode arc, like it's giving.

I worked a lot, but no one ever knows who I am.

But I'm still getting those checks even though I still work at Trader Joe's.

I one hundred motherfucker percent am on board with adding your mom's last name when need be to tell people how long.

You've been in the business.

Due Jordan Carlos Salson's been in the business a long time.

Was on a Moosia reboot which went nowhere on HBO Max, And I'm glad to say I did it.

You know, I'm so glad you're celebrating it because I did fall asleep a little bit while you're telling me that.

But I also need more naps.

I do love my name.

It is very hard for people because the last three letters are My last name is Eau, which is water in French, and people are still just like, what the fuck is this?

And I'm like, legit named after my dad.

His name is Michel Buteau, and so like I am a junior.

I tak it's a beautiful name.

But I do think he named me after him because he is bad with names.

And what I try to do was like put my name into shit so people know how to say it.

And so my first comedy special is called Welcome to Butopia.

Yeah, but it only fucks people like people like fuck my last name up even more because it's like literally Buteau and then pa at the end and he put it.

Oh on it.

This is so boring.

I'm actually like judging and falling asleep.

Like if this conversation, if this chat was on Dancing with the Stars, it'd be like a two point two go back, Michelle.

You're fun to talk to.

This isn't like an episode of The Swans.

All right, you can You're not boring me.

We're not talking to Gloria Vanderbilt here.

I love your name.

H the Vanderbilt.

You had this one Chateau Buteau, right, that was that was your first talk show.

Let's go back.

Oh my goodness, that was a pilot that never went through.

Yeah, actually it was.

I think it was like twelve years ago and I'm still waiting to hear for gets picked up.

You work on that.

We were kids speech one.

It was crazy.

I'm so sorry.

I'm not a malcop, but I do have a segway.

Oh god, there is no better segue to our guest for this episode.

When you talk about what's in a name, when you talk about the feeling you get when you hear someone's name.

You know, Vanessa Williams, who is a guess, is a fucking Black History Americana royal tay.

She's so cool.

She came to slummit with us in Barrooklyn, you know, just to see what the peoples are doing on the other side.

And not only does she come, she brought her daughter, Lion Babe.

I say lion Babe aka Julian.

Her name is Julian Herbie, but like you know, I know her as Lion Babe, and I'm just like, this is such a beautiful relationship and thing to witness where you live your dream and you pass that seat on of determination and creativity to your offspring, and it's.

Just like, oh fuck, it's amazing.

This is what not only America should be, but life should be.

And so y'all are gonna enjoy this episode, honey, this episode should be called black Girl megic.

Yeah, get into it.

Please give it a for Vanessa Williams and Jillian her Day.

Good lord, Oh.

Come on, I like that.

I like that like Zoomba warm up.

Can I get it one more time?

Yeah?

Yeah, yeah, there we go, There we.

Go, and one and answered it is happening.

Then five more, everybody?

Why do they always want five more?

Fuck them?

I don't like when trainers lie to me.

They're looking at my face.

Two more, two more, I'm like, stop it.

They lose count, they lose count.

Can I tell you the last male trainer I had, he was like, you're good?

Isn't good enough?

And this was the warm up and so just like tears came to my eyes as if I farted, like by accident, you know.

It was just like I couldn't even control it, and I just go, I have to go, And I ran away and never looked back.

And I have a female trainer and it feels good.

Yes, I've seen.

But if it was such a.

Weird reaction I had because I was like, oh, this is like you're the penut allergy.

I was like, I cannot listen to a man yell at me and tell me what's good enough.

Yeah, yeah, I only do.

I only do female trainers like online.

Yeah, but that's creepy.

Why why is it okay?

What?

No, they're much better.

They're just like they're like, you listen, you can.

Male trainers are like you're more exactly what you're saying.

They're like, come on, fucking sweat, let's go, let's get intense.

And I'm like if not, I'm look maybe not, you know what I'm saying like maybe it's just a medium intensity would be would be nice for.

Me, Like a medium intent, let me push myself, let me do it.

Yeah, I need like a deeply personal trainer.

You know what I'm saying.

Oh, like if I'm gonna have yeah, I want no, just.

Like a personal trainer is like you're stronger than your dad.

You know what I'm saying, like.

Deeply personal.

No one looks at your scars, you know what I'm saying.

Like it's like like they'll be like, oh, oh my god.

You know what I mean.

I don't know if you've got you guys have like seen Jordan on Instagram, but he is out here doing this is a kick, like a fucking.

I have to.

I have to beat the algorithm and like be like, you know, these are things I can do.

You know what I'm saying.

Wife is not complaining, So that's good, that's okay.

I can't complain.

You can complain.

I'm sorry sorry.

That you guys know, I appreciate that you stretch like you stretch and you take care of your body.

There is this video where you like looked at the cameras to be like it's almost like Shanaya twins like what you ready, girl, Let's go, and I'm like they start, this is my final form.

This is who I am now, this is this is it.

I don't know.

I like who likes to work out?

Does anybody like to work out?

In this audience?

Fucking too?

I love it?

Does anybody have a gym crush at all?

Anybody got a gym crush?

Well, there's people that like to work out, and I don't feel like I know people are going to Jim's a nasty That's like I'd rather be on a fucking school.

I do it all in my basement.

I can't.

I can't go like.

Female trainers, only in your basement.

It gets better, it gets better.

They're good.

They're the only ones that do like kettlebell training and not.

Who would you rather have like a kettible trainer that's just like telling you how to do the motions and it's fine, or a guy that looks like you don't know his whereabouts on January sixth?

You know what I'm saying, Like, yes, teaching you how to do it.

I would I have the former than the latter, Thank you so much.

I agree.

So people just got to look and they're good at different things, So I feel you on that.

Yeah.

I don't always post exercise, though I do it once in a while just to let people know.

Hey, big people move their bodies and so can you.

Yes, but it's never like you never looked at you.

You've read as the camera, no listen.

I was always inspired by Shania Twins Feel like a Woman video, and I'm just trying to emulate that, you know what I'm saying, So bring that energy.

Yeah, I like that.

I can tell you this, do you know what I mean?

Because it's a safe space.

It's just us and friends.

All my friends feel like the cousin that have like a fucking job right now, which is very nice, right right.

So I'm glad we can hang out and do this.

Thank you, And.

I'm glad what's happening right now.

I'm glad we can do this too, you know, I'm glad we.

I think my edible just kicked in, all right, and I'm happy.

You know that moment when your edible kicks in and you're like everything's okay, You're like no, no, you took an edible half an hour ago.

You're fine, Yeah, but you took an editle like I just saw you for a minute, I know.

I was like and everything slipped away.

I was like, that's your friend.

Yeah, but that's your friend over there.

You always high and it's wonderful, it's pretty great.

I can hower you not high?

Hi?

Have you lived in twenty twenty four before?

I fucking get up?

And I'm like, bump, like fucking nope, no, skips.

Just don't you like ever do too much?

Though?

Do I ever do too much?

No?

I went through life on coffee and just angst, and I was like, we're gonna change this up.

And after like after COVID, I was just like, I gotta fucking I gotta be more happy.

And I tried meditation, I tried exercise all kind of things, and it wasn't working.

And it was like, hey, buddy, Thg's right here, and like, as a forty five year old guy, I can I know what to do?

You know how to do?

Why is therebody?

It doesn't they're taking They're like they're like, what he's forty five?

All right?

No?

I know how to tight tray and just make sure I get the right amount.

Who's been in therapy?

My fuckers trade who's on their meds?

All right, like like, I know titration, what's up?

What's going on?

Make some noise.

If y'all have edibles, do you have them on you right now?

Make some noise.

Make some noise.

If you take an edible every day, Make some noise.

If you take a edible after five pm every day, make some noise.

If you just take edibles on the weekends, make some noise.

If you do a drug besides weed, make some noise if it's ketamine.

We're learning so much about this.

We are.

Some of you are total squares.

You're like I read, I got that, Christie and then go to bed.

But some of you have fun and I like that.

Some of you just go down okay holes.

Let's go okay.

Well, speaking of fun, Yeah, speaking of fun, we have a lot of fun in store for you.

Our next two guests.

Yes, yes, are a mother and daughter combo all right, Black.

History royalty, y'all, Black collegood royalty, everybody, Yes, Broadway, Oh, films, Yeah, CV music, all that iconique, iconique.

You do it.

You do it.

You're nice and high.

You do it.

No, I can't.

I'm high.

I shouldn't be doing I want you to do it.

I trust you, all right, please give it up for two o two gems, got it?

You got legends two gyms already, yep.

I mean'm on, y'all, please give it up for the one and only Vanessa Williams and you.

Oh my god, oh my god, get that drink, Get that drink?

Black History Month?

Am I seeing double?

Right now?

Am I seeing double?

What is going on?

This is?

This is my middle daughter, This is your middle number two out of four four four.

Oh my good.

I'm gonna be a little different because I'm with my mom tonight, just so everyone knows.

Sorry, it'll be like as good as I can.

But your mom is so cool.

No, she's really cool.

But she makes me nervous also, so I only should make all of you nervous as well.

I know.

I was in the green room and then she walked in and I was like, yeah, I was like your shirt.

You know, this is what I love about your mom, right, she looks through your soul in the best way possible, and it's like you can do better?

Do it?

You know what I mean?

Like be your best no judgment, no judgement, no judgment, but it's just wisdom.

Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah, And that's.

What I love and I love that you guys are like excited to work, do you know what I mean?

Like you love what you do.

Yeah, that's the work ethic that's been passed down.

Both my parents are music teachers.

They met in college.

Uh, and they just did it, you know, and they showed up.

And that's the one thing.

I mean, I'm sixty years old and people I always have live.

Right.

Yeah, But you know, every I get the question like how do you have longevity in this business?

And one is showing up on time, knowing your shit, being.

Great at what you are hired to do, and then.

Why are you.

Showing the fuck up when you're going to after multiple emails shortened thank you?

And then and then also being creative like in every possible way when you know as a woman, now that you're in the business and you can partake in every aspect of you know, for instance, we work together and First Wives Club, so now you know, like, yes, it's amazing, but but you know you have the knowledge now, like you know we can get this in a two shot.

How about you know you can speak because you know what you're talking about.

You have to be afraid of your power because it's recognized and the wisdom that you have now you're able to feel good about and free about.

And no one ever tells you to take your space, take up your space.

It's always like, no, your shit and be polite.

But sometimes you can just say something like it could be like we could do this better, or whatever kind of comment it is, and people are just like, oh, here she goes again.

But like, honestly, you know, the minute I stopped apologizing, even just before I said something frivolous, I'm sorry, guys, like I'm walking like a different woman.

You know, taking up your space is so important now as a mothers though we had to earn that.

I mean, you could not speak.

Yeah you know again.

Yeah, I won Miss American in eighty three.

I've been working.

I remember how sorry.

Hit.

I wasn't in Atlantic City, but I was there.

I remember, yeah, yeah, I yeah.

But you know, in the eighties nineties, you weren't allowed to take your space.

You were told what you did.

And yeah, I hear, yeah, and you had to play by the rules and even you know, all the assaults and the microaggressions that we had to eat and swallow because it was you get fired or you know, you know, I.

I guess he's dead now, so I can say I.

One of my first jobs was in a sitcom and it was going to be on the Red Fox show.

He had a series, and I was playing a waitress in Sindbad was also you know, so me and Sinbad were part of the weekly thing and we do our rehearsals and then everybody would disappear, and he would show up and kind of start talking to me, and I was like, where is everybody?

And I remember one time he was like looking at me, It's like, m I sucked the ear wax out of your ear.

And I was like, where is everybody?

And I was like, okay, this is this is obviously something that was allowed to happen.

Yes, you know, he's yeah, I want to suck the air wax that you discussing.

This is after Sandford, This was his own.

This is probably eighty five eighty six.

Yeah.

He also said like, you got hair in your chin like a white girl.

I was like, huh yes.

I was like, it's not funny and you're creeping me out.

And I called my manager and it said.

Sorry, it's really disturbing.

Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah, and I and I said I don't feel comfortable and I want to get off, and I got off after one episode, even though it was like getting a gig on a show, But you know, I didn't like there was no lawsuit.

I wasn't going to go public with it.

And we're talking this is, you know, obviously thirty five years later or more than that.

But you swallowed it.

You know.

So the right that you have now to take your space and to be listened to is something that you know, Diane Carrol helped you and you can't help do.

I don't take it for granted.

You know, Horn helped you.

Just you know, I don't take it for granted.

Yeah, one bit, because when especially people younger than me, complain about all the injustices, I'm like, just remember that the needle is still moving.

Because ask your mom what she had to go through.

I was loved and very secure, but my mother was the wise not the wise one.

My dad was the nicest, warmest, loveliest, most optimistic man on the planet.

My mother was like, watch that person, watch your watch your purse, you know, where's your sweater, where's your you know, make sure you have money because if you get caught, you're gonna need a quarter to get on you get payphoned.

She was always that lord.

But she was always like, met are dogs?

Met are dogs?

And she told me like, never take nude pictures.

Of course that I listened to her, no, but but but she was like she was always kind of like protecting me from what I didn't know, you know, because I was never like you're a princess, Oh you're so beautiful.

I was just, you know, I bowed the lawn.

I had to do chores, I baby said.

I was working, you know, from ten years old on in the neighborhood, like we all did, you know, to make to make our money.

Absolutely yeah, and buy my ten Steed bike by myself.

And is that what your.

Mom does for you?

I did not mow the lawn now.

It's too much bigger lawn.

By the way, you need.

We got a couple of eggs.

Oh do you need the list?

Okay, well we can't get it out truly, Like you.

Grew up in the business, I did, I mean I didn't.

I didn't.

I think growing up in Westchester, New York.

Shout out to Washington, anyone, look Westchester.

It's not upstate.

I know.

We call it that but anyway, well we're called Yonkers upstate.

New York updates.

Anyway, there was was you know, it was a different experience.

But it also I had such great examples of people that led lives as artists.

So I think that's why it's been so easy for me to fall into what I do, because I've had hard working artists in my life and set that precedent for me.

But I do think my mom, if anything, if she gave me any of the gaga basically our grandma's called gagah, she's og gaga before.

Yes, But like you know, in eighth grade, I remember my mom.

We had intercom at the time in the house and she intercom me to come into her room and she had articles printed out, staples and everything about blowjobs, gonorrhea, all of.

It, and sat me down and scared.

The living crap out of me.

Ta literally like imagine this was.

Pre will Wilhelmina Slater, but this was Wilhelmina Slater waiting for me to talk to me about blowjobs.

And wells e.

Death.

I'm sorry, blow jobs and death sounds like a real best seller, but.

But you had.

I will never forget that day.

It was a real scary tactic, but you know, I think it was it was necessary because I was so in love with my boyfriend at.

The time and all this stuff, you know.

But no, I think I had a.

Great combination of kind of like the hard ass, be a little scared of her, but then she also was like, be free, trust herself, and I go.

With your gut.

And she took me hard work talking about worth work ethic because they were backstage when I did Kiss of the Spy Woman on Broadway.

The recording they've been the recording studio.

They so they've been on set, so they know the hours, they know the preparation.

So when she got into the business and started recording, she knew that it took.

You know, a lot of time.

What's your what's your first memory of that?

What's your first memory of like, okay, being in the in the realm of entertainment.

I don't know if I have a specific memory, but I do remember like sets, and I remember recording studios, like cold recording studios with a lot of leather and just sitting there like what am I doing?

Always making friends with like the engineers or the pas or you know, whoever, the people are just running around.

But yeah, I mean also sitting in the trailer whatever trailer we were in for a long time until Charles Luther Vandros, which was awesome.

God.

Yes, And at the time it was a whole family affair, like my my uncle was doing the opening comedy stand up bid and my mom's best friend.

Was doing Chris Williams.

Check him out, He's amazing.

I've been in a commercial with Chris Williams.

I've been a commercial, yes, with your brother.

Yeah, And I've been waiting to.

Tell you we're so.

I was here is crazy Eyes killer and uh and oh my god, let me find out.

So the story you just told has is really taken me back because as a working mother, as a multi hyphen it, as you know, as a life's good at tax payer and I have five year old twins, I'm realizing that there is no balance, you know, the I just do what I can when I can.

And so.

Did you ever feel that guilt?

Did you ever say, like I can't make your play, I can't you know, take you to whatever?

And you have a kid now too, Like how did you navigate like getting another job that's really gonna just you have to put your heart and soul into it, right.

Yeah, And how do you give your heart and soul to your kid like you have to make a living too?

Yeah.

Yeah, I think the biggest, the biggest feet I did was your confirmation.

When I had a gig in Japan.

I was at the Blue Note and I had I was in Osaka and I had six shows in Osaka, flew to Tokyo, flew to New York, arrived the morning that Saturday morning of your your confirmation at church through a party, got back on a plane on Sunday, went to direct to Tokyo and then had did ten shows in Tokyo.

That was like the most epic journey I've ever done for.

Any of my kids.

Yeah.

But take that Taylor swipe.

Yeah and it was commercial.

Yeah, just love.

No shade to Taylor.

But we love you, Taylor, We love you.

Please.

We can't talk about politics here, well we all know them.

But I think we we as mothers, we always feel guilt.

It doesn't even if we're in the in town and five minutes late, we will always feel guilt.

So you gotta let that go and know that you did the best that you can or you're doing the best that you can.

And they they they're, oh my gosh, what is happening today?

Being the mom is hard?

Bitch.

I'm on fifteen miligrams.

I am gone.

That guilt?

Will you the fuck alive?

Shit?

That might be a boalding introver by the time.

Fucking this is your end?

Shit, Jillian?

Can I know?

Can I learn about your processed songwriting process?

I want to know what you know, what blows your hair back?

What makes you He's from Texas?

You're like, sorry, do you like to?

This is what he calls biting around the cookie.

It's a lie.

I'll tell you.

That's one dog that won't hunt.

Now, all right, come on, what is my okay?

So?

I started out as a dancer.

I was dancing.

I wanted to be a dancer.

I loved Alvin Allie like I wanted to just be like a legendary black body giving life and experiencing life through dance.

And I still do that, but singing became kind of like an afterthought after I just got my confidence on stage and performing.

So ever since then, I've always tried to write music about this kind of higher self and this feminine power and just empowering women and feeling like own it, do it.

So sometimes the messages are things that I need to hear myself.

Sometimes there's things that I've experienced and I want to share.

And at this point, I am a mom.

I have a two year old, so thank you.

And I feel like.

Because time has just taken a whole like curveball crash into a wall, and I have no time to do anything that when I go in it's really like I have to I have to focus, I have to get the critic out of my head.

I have to not dwell in like the whole process and just go in and have fun.

So with that, weirdly we are in house music right now.

We're just like it's you know, like I think when you're home and you're watching like Almo on repeat, or you're trying to like calm yourself down and light candles and drink tea.

When you do go to record, you just want to turn up.

So I think of like the whole other.

Paradox of my life that happened that I don't experience as much, So I'm trying to find that through dance.

So it's it's really like just fine, like don't care too much it's like make a song and keep them a bit right.

That's why I am.

I love when it gets sloppy sometimes, I mean sloppy in like a constructive way.

Has there ever been a show, a live show where you're just like, Okay, that went wrong, that went wrong.

Still going wrong, still a show still here?

Like what is the craziest live show moment?

If you probably Broadway?

When I was doing Kiss the Spider Woman and uh, top of act two and I played this Russian woman and it's very dramatic, gonna have good times and I'm doing this whole piece and I'm supposed to get shot and it didn't go off, and the phone rang and it was kind of like suspended it air and like what do I do?

And it was just like everything.

When someone coughed some one time, it was so loud that we broke because it was like.

We looked to how do like you know?

So those one time?

And Kiss the Spiderman again.

It was it was a hot show and the two a couple in the back in the standing room were actually doing it and what kicked it?

Yeah?

Yeah, the ushers were ushers told us like literally guy was behind she looked out of her skirt.

They were like, it was crazy.

This is ninety four ninety five.

It was you know, I said I was sorry, So some wild.

Stuff happened in amazing.

That's amazing, Peter.

Our kids are notoriously naughty, right, like is it?

Yes?

I'm not a theater kid.

I don't know.

I not a dancing in the bathroom mirrorm.

On babes and what's it called babes and arms.

I may have worked the lights, you know, so to speak.

No, so I know that life.

I was a techie.

I were all black, and I made out with the young lady once.

Uh and.

During during dress rehearsal.

During dress rehearsal, it was a pretty.

Pretty naughty.

What about you, Jillian?

What about you?

Have you ever had a crazy moment moment on stage?

I think it was my first south By Southwest I at the time this was pre working with him, but Childish Gambino at the time was like, come open for us, like I'm into you.

Oh, And I was so new.

We hadn't done many.

Performances at all, but we're gonna say yes like this too.

It We were just signed, so I didn't even have in ears like I didn't know what to do when you're on stage any of this.

So I go on and perform, but.

I realized that the sound basically they could hear me, but like they couldn't.

Hear the whole sound.

So I was like doing all my moves and like being really weird, and they just were like, oh, some girl like who did a bunch of like weird yoga open.

No, like in my ears, they sound great.

I didn't know.

It's never went into the house.

So I was like, you know, they figured it out by like the last song, but yeah, it was.

There was one of those moments.

That I was like, what, like, yeah, so I don't know it and it didn't hurt me in the end, but it was.

It was definitely memorable.

Now when I was I'm doing New York Comedy Festival in town Hall.

It's so funny, this lady's here.

I danced to Janet Jackson's for the Nation at one point because I don't know who I am.

I'm the only child.

I just love hugging people.

You're all my family, and I guess there was something about the lights or something.

I thought this person was having a seizure and so I just stopped, the show, cut the house lights on.

I was like, can someone please come get this person make sure they're okay.

I don't want to touch them, soone should touch them and give her a book and yeah, And this lady in the front was like that was my friend.

And I'm like, oh shit, she okay.

This was like two or three years ago.

And she was like, yeah, she was too high.

And I'm like, okay, figure out the dosage.

If you're sitting in the front, that is the moral of the story.

That is the moral of the story.

We have to get to questions, but the amount of life lived and memories made and knowledge and also path set.

The question really is like how do you feel about the state of the world right now?

But mainly like why do you like why?

I was trying to tell people that the arts are so important, but why do you guys believe the arts are important?

Especially with I don't know who's going to win this election.

I don't know what people are doing in the South and other areas.

The fuck did I do?

I'm one of the good ones, I know, because you're pay New York taxes, But like, yeah, like just why do you think it's so important?

To do what you guys do.

Well not I'll let you talk about the arts.

But you know, going back in our family history, I did a show called who Do You Think You Are?

And they got a chance to uncover two of my great great grandfathers and one was born in Cole Spring Harbor near Oyster Bay in eighteen forty two.

Married a white woman in eighteen sixty five.

This is one hundred years before the Civil rights movement in the nineteen sixties.

Of course her parents she was from Wales.

Her parents disowned her because she married a free man of color.

They ended up having a bunch of kids.

He went and fought for Troop twenty six here in Queens and with down to Buford, South Carolina, which is close to Trust.

Yes, yeah, and good grit.

But he was there as a Union soldier to make sure that you know, our freedom was you know.

So it was there for a while.

And then one hundred years later, my parents have me at nineteen sixty three when Kennedy is shot and MLK is shot.

Years later, you know, a few years later, those hundred years of my family, you look back and think, oh my god, the racism, how do we get through it?

Everybody got through it.

Everybody got through their.

Time, through what they chose to do and had the braver encourage to get through it and made life work.

So I think we'll be able to get through whatever happens.

And I'm not guarantee, you have no idea what's going to happen, but we'll get through it and we have we have to.

I believe you because staring into your eyes is like looking into the sea, and.

And I really believe it.

I buy it.

I'm gonna rest easy tonight.

Vanessa Williams who has.

The Mediterranean in her eyes, and it's like, you're gonna make a kid like fine, I'm fine.

Yeah, you have to.

Yeah, we have right.

You have to have faith, good encourage to get through it, to speak up and to move on.

Well, I think I think you know you're right.

Some rights are you're born with and some you fight for.

And it's like, and we cannot, we can.

We have to keep fighting for what we what we deserve, what we want, what we're owed, you know what I mean.

And that's those human rights.

Obama, I know that was I was quoting doctor King there.

I was like, I was like, I'm gonna just I'm gonna just pretend like I made that up.

But yeah, he would say that some rights, uh are inherent, they're inalienable.

Rights that that you are.

I tell my daughters all the time, sociable, Some rights you're born with and some you fight for.

Fired up, Ready to go?

All right?

Yeah, we have questions from the audience.

Would you guys like to help us answer them?

Sure?

All right, this is from Elsa.

Thank you so much for your name.

Elsay's right here.

What's the best advice for dating in your twenties and prioritizing yourself?

Wow?

I heard don't do it right here to Well, I got married at twenty three, so but again I know that was in nineteen eighty seven.

I had my first kid in nineteen eighty seven eighty nine, so I was twenty four, twenty six, thirty and thirty seven when I had all my kids.

Wow.

But yeah, but I did it because I could control that.

I couldn't control my career, I couldn't control what people would or would not give me opportunities, but I could control my life in terms.

Of my family.

So I said, I'm going to make my family.

And my husband at the time was thirteen years older than me, so he had already established himself.

He was actually the one who was my publicist to helped me through all of my resignation and all that stuff when I was twenty one years old.

Of course, my parents didn't want me to get married or date anybody who was thirteen years older when I was twenty one.

But whatever my mom said do, I said, I will not or you know, so you know I was.

I was that check that was very rebellious and got married to twenty three.

But I don't regret a single day.

Yeah, that's my twenty year old stories.

I didn't date and I didn't date you what's yours?

That was not my.

Mom, No, mine is like so much more boring.

Like I am, I meet someone and I'm like they're amazing, and I just stay with them forever until it falls apart, and then I find the next person.

I'm like, oh, we're just I'm not looking for that, and then it's that.

So it's been three people, Like it's it's very minimal.

It's very boring.

Don't do what I did.

Live your life, because then there'll be a moment where you're like, wait, I need to do that thing.

So but I have to say, no matter what, the men in my life have been really supportive of me, and I think that's what you always want to strive for as someone that's not trying to diminish your light or change you.

They want to really just be part of the growth.

But they also need to grow themselves and they need to know that that has nothing to do with you.

So that okay, okay, this is what this one is addressed Legendary Vanessa.

Full name.

What is your favorite memory of hanging with Trixy Mattel Tricksey.

Separately, is there a song?

And this is very this is a penetrating question.

Separately, is there a song in your career that got away?

Xo XO seth Okay, I guess so.

Tricksie and I did a show called Queen of the Universe.

It was a drag queen singing competition on Paramount Plus for two seasons.

We did not get renewed like you did, but we had a lovely time and I've got new music coming out and she's featured on my song called Bob you know, because kids need a big old bop, so it's coming.

And the song that got Away, there was no song that, well, I think you're probably to prince moment.

Okay, prince moment.

So there was a prince moment.

Okay, thank you for reminding me.

Okay.

So the first song that got away was one called girlfriend that Pebbles did.

Oh shit, Oh yeah, yeah, girl, you want to hear this ad?

Wow.

So I was working with Babyface in La Read when they were sharing a two bedroom apartment on Highland Boulevard you know where that is, back in nineteen eighty seven.

I was pregnant with Mellie at the time.

But me and Babyface are working on the electric piano on the song and coming up with the demo and Pebbles walks in, I guess, invited by someone I don't know, and we're singing the song Pebbles and she's like, oh, that's a jam.

I go, yeah, yeah, that's a jam.

I was like yeah.

The next day I went to continue working on the song and they had given it to Pebbles, goddamn it.

So that was seth.

That was number one that got away.

Number two is that the first time I actually recorded and heard myself on the radio was with George Clinton from Parliament Buffet, Yes, and I ended up doing George's album because I was doing an off Broadway show here called One Man Band.

Back in nineteen eighty five.

Deborah barshe was a musical director.

We both moved to LA at the same time, and Deborah called and said, I'm working with this guy named George Clinton on his album.

I go what, And She's like, what, you want to sing with me?

He said absolutely, She had no idea, And of course we grow flashlight what really light?

Yeah, so we knew, Yeah, I like fat lie.

Stopped.

So I sang on these two songs, go do fries, go with that shake and hey, good lugging.

Wow.

So it was wonderful working with him and in the studio, and he said, you know what, I want to produce an album on you.

And he said, let's Princess coming into town at the Universal Amphitheater.

That's what it was called back in the day.

So George Clinton and I went to see Prince.

And I was dating my husband at the time, or he was my He wasn't my soon to be husband.

Yeah no, but we weren't.

Nobody was there yet, uh and be yeah, soon to be.

And so after we saw Prince's show, he came out and he gave me a cassette which I cannot find.

Two demos kills me.

Uh and like Williams, I want you to have this castelle.

And and he he met George.

He said I had a George.

He said hi to me, and then they said, and this is Ramona said, oh, I forgot.

So it's like I guess he was trying to make a move and realized that I was dating my Yeah, I don't.

Bring sand to the beach, so he used to say.

It didn't work out.

But just on a side note, the song that got away from two other people, which was a song that I did call say the best for last, but it.

Was passed on.

But Barbara streisand passed on it or her people pass it, and Bette Midler's people passed on it.

So I got sloppy third what he calls what's third last?

Exactly?

I'll take it and take it over and over again.

Oh my, there you go, Seth said, thank you for the two part of Wow.

The it all okay?

I got the next question.

This is an interesting question.

Do what you will with it?

Should I give up and date a white man?

Oh my god, you'll find the exits here and here legitimately came in this show on the train and wrote.

That down in a car.

Are we the court of last resort?

Like?

What are we that the oracle of Delphi?

Like, what's the I've come to ask?

I'm on my last black nerve and don't like.

Look, I don't.

I don't think you'd be giving up.

I think you'd be opening your options to love, to be honest, because in this day and age, it's like you need to just hunk.

Her down with a good person.

There's a white guy that's not a It's like, you're.

Goddamn right, he's not my husband, and he's not.

That's another white dude.

That's another one.

Can I tell you?

I'm married, so, ma'am.

But he could cook, and he's got a booty, and yeah, he's got good taste of music.

And when I'm home late from a show, he lays my bonnet on a pillow.

Again another bestseller title, he lays my bonnet on my pillow.

You're not giving up, You're just looking within.

That's right, agreed.

I can't advise you there.

I don't know, ladies, love is love his love.

I mean, I think that's what I've learned from you.

But you can't really look at a person.

You need to be attracted to them in some way.

But I think more of their spirit.

That has to be the thing that carries through you know, and that and yes, you'll deal with things.

But I do think if someone loves you the right way, it doesn't really matter what their background is.

Ever give up, I mean giving give up what I mean, you're giving up humanity?

I mean you know, yeah, and no one's no one's keeping score like you should?

You should go and try.

They probably single that I have time to keep score?

You have someone to have dinner with.

Bitch, what's the next quart?

We got time for more?

Question?

The older I get, the more I hate people, parentheses, annoyed?

How do I continue.

Wait?

Wait, wait, it's just growing?

How do I continue growing into my genuine self without becoming a missing thrope?

I love that word impossible?

Didn't Moliere write then miss throat?

And yeah?

I think so?

Indeed, it's hard leve that's the hard thing to answer.

I don't know, what do you?

What do you all think?

What do you?

How?

How does one do that?

How do you grow and get into yourself more?

Without like shutting out the world.

I understand and patience.

You know, the older you get, the more you like, I'll just do it.

And and that's just kind of you know how to do stuff.

Your your patients, I think definitely dwindles windles unless you're with your grandchild, which I let him do anything.

And I have patients.

I can understand being annoyed and and not having not wanting to deal with people just because of age.

And you know, but again, you just gotta if you cut yourself off, you're losing days.

And you know what I mean, And oh man, there's a finite amount.

Of days like why, yeah, why don't you do that?

I mean, I mean, okay, New York is always inviting you to hate other people.

True, that's what it.

That's what we do here.

You know what you're saying is our love.

Maybe there's someone from Texas not all the time.

What I do love about New York is this.

Yes we're aggressive, Yes we get to the point.

Yes we always have somewhere to go, even though we have nowhere to go.

But New Yorkers like we're still a community.

We pride ourselves on knowing the direction.

When you don't, we'll help you know, it might not be met with like a smile and like a ism, but you got to where you need to go.

Also, if someone like something happens to somebody, we all step in, like I don't know someone.

That's just like not stepping in when someone's hurt in public.

Sometimes I step over.

Now, let me say.

In my head, all right, there are two things that New Yorkers will still do to this day, and I appreciated one.

They will tell you when your bag is open, won't they?

They'd be like, yes, South, all right, jesus.

Two, your shoes untied, you shoot, you gonna fall?

You welcome.

New Yorkers have substitute teacher energy.

And I'm here for it, okay, And I'm here for it.

Okay.

Last question from the question, and I like this question.

What is your earliest memory?

Oh my god, Yeah, I was born in California, so somewhere in California.

Backyard.

But yeah, like grass, sun, happiness, I don't know what that is.

That's beautiful.

That's a beautiful life.

That's what that is.

Peaceful?

Yeah, and your mom gave you that, that's fucking amazing.

I spent my first year in the Bronx.

Each two twenty third Street, b X and Grandma Bacon was my caretaker while my parents were working as music teachers in Westchester.

So I remember vaguely the apartment, brick apartment, and I remember like visiting there after we moved out to Westchester when I was you know, one or so, but yeah, just warmth and loving hugs and stuff, I guess, and dogs.

I always had dogs.

I love that I have dogs and I have kids.

I feel like that's how I'm going to teach him about death.

That was my first trauma.

Yeah, my dog Mouse died and was hit by I went to way to girl Scout camp and it was raining the whole weekend.

It came back and they said Mouse is gone.

I go, what do you mean?

Mouse has gone?

We can't find him and he had wandered out and I guess somebody found him on the road down the street.

And I just remember like it was yeah, rack, So I had to be like nine or so, eight nine.

It was awful, but the other memory was good.

I got.

What about you?

What's your friend?

I want to hear don't like okay, but I love you.

No, we got to ask them the question that we Yeah, we gotta ask.

Hours one having sex.

What is We asked all our guests what is the most adult thing you would like to do for yourself this year that you haven't done?

It?

Truly?

Could be anything big or small.

Some people say, organize your garage.

Boy would was like, I want to go to Japan and go to a baseball game and take Srisota and small the air.

Remember what?

Oh my goshaul A.

Shakeoul Ai said, I want to go to Capri in capri pants and drink a Capri Sidney Washington said, I want to cut.

More people off, like in traffic.

Yes, what is the most adult thing that you guys For me?

It was making salad dressing from scrash?

Yes, who does that?

Yeah?

But a good one?

You do that?

What do you make?

You make salad dressing?

Now?

Look at me?

What about second season renewal?

Doesn't say I make my own style dressing?

Okay, it's really cringey because I just I'm so embarrassed as a person to admit this, But I have to get my fucking driver's license again.

Yes, airhorn, what happened?

Yes, she let it lapse.

No, it's so easy, you can do it loud in my pre pandemic ways, just living life in New York.

You never need to drive ever in New York ever, So I, you know, whatever, twenty nineteen hits and it's like you got to renew, like go get an eye test, and I'm like, whatever, I'll do this one.

Ever, twenty twenty hits, I like, forget about it.

You forget about it because the world is falling apart, so you're not focused on that.

And then by the time I came to and realized I have to get this thing, it was expired late.

That's okay, Sorry, I didn't.

I couldn't find my license for like a year.

And then I was like, whatever, it's active.

Couldn't find it for like a year, just traveling with the passport for no reason.

You have a passport on me.

And then I just like put on a jean.

Jacket I haven't seen in a while.

I was like, you never know, that's a very adult thing.

Yes, I want to do some yachting.

That's very adults.

She speaks.

You want to do and I don't want to pay for it, but I want to be a guest on a fabulous Yeah.

I watched the deck all the time, do you Yeah, it's the best I've I've watched every season, every bed.

I want to getty white girl in shorts or scored to like he's giving me champagne.

And a small hot Yes, do you want to?

Do you want to bounce out of cannab Ran or something like that?

Do you want?

I mean, I love that.

Do you want to?

Normally they're like at least one hundred one fifty.

There are some big mega yachts with a whole crew, and they do like themed dinners, like there's the White Parties.

Yeah, so I want to do all that.

It's it's it seems hilarious and fun.

I want that for you.

Let's we've gotta find somebody to pay for it, but then I will be again.

Gotcha give us for Vanessa?

Thank you so much, Michelle.

Talking to people of this ilk Lis quality is just like so amazing and fun because when you come to think about it's actually three generations of very musically talented people.

It's Vanessa Wlliams's parents who taught music in Westchester and then influenced her.

She influenced her daughter and now here.

We are, and they have both influenced different generations.

Yes, do you know what I mean.

And so that's why I always tell people, don't tell your self know before someone else does, you know, and even then figure out what to do with that rejection and live in it and only let that shit fuel you.

Because if you're gonna sit here and be like, but everyone's doing it and it's too hard, then why are you even living?

You know?

And and I put this in my show too, Season one and Survival of the Thickest all episodes available on Netflix right now, nominated for seven and DOLEACP Image Awards.

Hey Hey.

In the last episode, dream big because it makes life worth living, and that could mean anything.

It doesn't necessarily have to be your name in lights.

It could be real estate, it could be writing something like no matter how big or small.

And so that's why I love the question that we always ask our guests at the end of each episode, what's the most adult thing you want to do for yourself?

Because it really, like is very telling on what we think adulting is.

But you know, the more we do this show, the more I'm just like, Oh, it is trusting your gut and taking your shoes off when you go to someone's house, your nasty little bitch.

So sorry.

Hey you guys, if you like the show, tell your friends to listen to it.

Okay, yes, if you want to rate and rate and rescribe, awesome.

Please try to get command see all right, guys, if you like the show, please subscribe, RTE and review.

Okay, we can take it.

We can take whatever sism Okay, no.

Jordan could take it and then filter it down to me because I can't.

I can't.

It's too much.

You know how hard it is to find a black double X tank top that has like one of those straps that you can like make tighter.

That's enough for me, and I don't need to read what people think about me, because you know, I've been trying to find my belly.

But when I sit down since like nineteen eighty six.

Well, while you're adoring us online.

You can also check out some of our merchency just exactly right store dot com.

That was such like my husband, my husband does that move?

He's like, Okay, she's done.

I'll move on.

Thank you.

Jordan Carlos, what was the last name?

Carlos?

Is my last day?

What's mama?

Oh?

Jordan Carlos Nelson, Jordan Carlos Nelson.

That's thank you so much.

Jordan Carlos Nelson.

M Okay, listen, I love this episode.

This is amazing.

Please subscribe right and review.

Oh my god, this has been adulton.

Guys.

Jordan Carlos Nelson has been replaced by Ai And who wanted to do all the things.

He has been shopping at her merch.

He's drinking out of all the wine glasses too much, and he don't know how to behave.

All right, y'all, take care of yourself and don't forget.

Don't flush those wipes down the toilet now unless they're biodegradable.

All right, bye bye, And and don't forget to go to exactly right store.

Oh my god, Okay, now now I'm going.

This has been an exactly right production.

Our senior producer is g Holley.

Our associate producer is Christina Chamberlain.

This episode was mixed by John Bradley.

Our guest booker is Patrick Cotner.

Additional production support from Hannah Kyle Crichton.

Theme song and live show DJing is by DJ Don Will.

Our live producer is Makala Konazovich.

Artwork by Jamie Bechtel.

Photography by Reis vander Most.

Executive produced by Karen Kilgera, Georgia Hartstar and Daniel Kramer.

Follow the show on Instagram at Adulting the Pod.

Email your questions to Adulting Questions at gmail dot com.

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