Welcome to adulting.

I am Jordan Carlos.

This is my co from Go Michelby Toe.

Oh look at you, look at me and all your glorious dreads.

I love it.

It's giving Patra Ooh, it's giving liones Patra.

Oh my god, what Patra?

Romantic call from the eighties?

What's wrong with you?

Okay?

First of all, you call yourself out on all your references, I.

Guess, but that doesn't mean that you should be following suit.

First of all, I have a fauxlox.

I have vacation hair, but there's no vacation.

Okay.

You know I love protective styles for black girl hair, especially when you are working on a big project.

You don't have time to do your hair.

You are just out here doing the most while doing the least, if that makes sense.

But you know, I like to like him myself to a Lisa Bone that let herself go, because that feels.

More accurate than like I'm on our romantic home.

Shout out to Patrick, I really appreciate it.

We will get to the Lisa Bone top ad if that's what you're looking for.

We have to get to our guests because this is a full last show and I'm so excited, Like.

I don't even understand.

I don't even understand why she came it.

What is going on?

How do we even like this?

I don't know.

Our guest is Nora Jones.

You guys say it again, Nora Jones.

No, not the Norad Jones you went to school with, Nora Jones.

Not the substitute teacher you remember from que Out Norah Jones.

Okay, I mean she's sold more than fifty million records world why she just dropped a new album, Vision Visions, which is her.

Ninth studio album.

She's a boss ass, bad ass bitch and she can't to slum it with us at the Bellhouse.

You better enjoy the fuck out of this episode because I'm getting moist just talking about it.

Sorry about it?

Let me go get my wife nor Jones.

Everyone you're Joan?

What's up?

I don't what's right?

Stam the fuck up?

Damn the fuck up?

What didn't we do?

Thank you?

Thank you?

My gosh, Brooklyn, Hey, Brooklyn, what's Brooklyn?

Ass?

This is exciting as fuck.

Look at all these broke ass people to see a good ass show.

Yes, thank you showing an affordable show.

Affordable twenty five dollars.

I believe twenty five dollars.

A, yes, twenty five dollars.

All asses, make some noise if you got more than eight thousand dollars in your bank account?

Shit issue, don't you live in dangerous?

That wasn't everybody that was like, make some noise if you got less than five thousand dollars.

Yeah, that's all gass, no breaks.

I love this.

Welcome to this allthing.

I'm gonna shove you toe.

That's Jordan Carlos giving up for DJ Donald.

WHOA, I'm the ones that choos.

So nice to be in this space tonight.

Look, everybody looks so good.

So wonderful.

White people, yes, we always have like bad black bitches, yes, and the and the people in between in between.

Our demo is.

Like, oh my god, do we have someone from Iran?

Are you from my run?

Some people say Persia, some people see right.

Yeah.

We have a friend named Canadate who's done the podcast.

He's amazing.

He's also from Iran.

We call him the Persian Pony because that's what he calls himself.

And so every time we go to a restaurant and the food is good, he makes that noise.

Thank you so much.

At it's like an airhort.

Thank you for your service.

Amazing.

I know I was gonna say it's given Kildean realness at a diner in Michigan, but I thought that was such a deep cut.

Yes, two and a half people, I'm here for you.

It's pacificity.

It's hot in here.

It is damn.

It's the air on it just smells like Tenny sweet.

It's the talent.

It's the talent in the room.

That's what it is.

Is that what it is?

Yeah, look at you, but you look good.

Thank you.

Yeah.

I had a salad for lunch and uh and.

It shows, thank you so much.

You look great to look at you.

Look at shoe.

Yeah, and I also had a chocolate bar with that salad.

Don looks good as always.

Look at his hair.

I love it.

My god, it's giving interview with a vampire black reboot.

What I'm going for?

Rice, I just heard her Dick jump.

You know you have you have beautiful hair done.

It's beautiful and I'm just I want you to know that beautiful.

Okay, Yeah you been Jordan's I do see it.

It's like an explorer.

You have like a talking about it thing happening.

You look like a Jean Baptist pointsab you know who that was?

I don't, but he sounds French.

Yeah, no, he he gotta ask you a question.

As a brother with some good ass hair, do people want to touch at him?

Put their fingers open a ship?

They used to.

That's why I used to wear hats all the time.

Oh no, it was like a protective covering.

That's why I wear a bra.

They want to touch it, can't handle.

It's a bra for your hair.

It's a fleshy jamboique.

I used to call my Teddy's Napa Valley because all drunk white people with purple lips try to get up in there and tell.

A story that they could and finish.

And I'll say, you know.

What, I'm need the support from our friends and a bra.

Yeah you're like, this ain't Sonoma.

You better get out of here.

Absolutely, Yeah.

I need you to fucking tell everybody that He came in flustered tonight.

He was about to tell me the story.

I said, save it for the stage.

I said, all I want to hear.

And it's such a great excuse to like not listen to you too.

That what about the other people want to hear it.

Well, I had I had vermin in my house, and uh, I know, I know, I tell.

The people from Jersey what that means.

Vermin, rodentia, rodentia, I had so Pennsylvania, Pennsylvania's So I had a mouse in my house.

It was scary.

You know, my wife has the best hearing.

She's from New York, so she's like, she has the best hearing.

It's like New Yorkers contend with so much noise all day, ambulances, yelling, screaming, bumping, like all this stuff.

And then she's like, I hear a mouse.

What you talking about?

Like, she's like under the stove over behind, Yes, it was under the stuff when it was in the baking pants.

And she's like, did you get yes, it was it was the baking pants and that weird drawer with the baking pants are.

Yes, that's when they go that's their penthouse.

And then she she texts me, she's like, did you wash all the baking pants?

And I was like, that's.

That's you know, that's the setup.

The No one really washes that ship.

You just wipe it all.

You just wipe the crumbs off and put it back in.

Can bacon pant cannot fit in the dishwasher if you have one, and it's like, who's washing it?

Can I say something else?

Here's here's the thing.

No, no, no, no, no no no.

I always say this.

What friends with the middle child with an Audie belly button?

Okay?

No, I had a surgery and it went back in Okay.

Because of stigma, and so anyway, yes, I consciously remembered not washing one baking sheet one time, and then I was like, I internalized and I was like, it's me.

I did it.

So anyway, we had the mouse.

Yes, so she immediately calls the exterminator.

And you didn't see droppings nowhere?

She saw droppings.

She saw you gotta see the drop people think the droppings.

You know, my husband, who's so white in European and trust everything, stop that.

Don't do that.

He'll just drink water in any state.

I said, stop that.

Next, Oh no, stop it.

Look both ways.

When you cross the fu street, people don't give a.

Fuck about you here, No they don't.

And he was like, those aren't droppings.

I said, listen, Okay, I'm no Bill Ny the science guy, but I know fucking mouse shit.

When I see it, Yeah, they look like little chocolate sprinkles and mice be shitting everywhere.

But anyway, yeah, she's thinking a great metabolism.

I'm jellous.

Yeah.

To be honest, if I was dropping it like that, oh baby, I'd have to excuse myself four times from the host chat.

They are they are mooe regular And so even with the tiniest crumb, why don't it right out?

And then so anyway, she's like mousehunter.

She sees signs of passing.

She's like, yeah, I see footprints, you know, And so we call the extreminator comes, He's like, how did you find the exterminator?

We have a very good exterminator.

We just reached just a neighborhood exterminated.

Neighborhood exterminity.

We did a neighborhood exterminator.

He was a lovely dude named Tony.

He was a seventy seven year old black man that only talked about opening up a hairdresser from the money he made from selling cocaine ship in Brooklyn back in the day.

Pinky rings for the gods, you know, like out here, like even a pinky fucking fingernail.

He's still asli, are you still what are we doing?

But then he went close to himself when he worked, and it was so beautiful.

It was the closest I've ever been to the Negro spiritual.

It was beautiful.

Tony, if you're still alive, I hope you figured out your Apple podcasts.

Yeah.

So so the guy comes, He's like, look, the mouse like burrowed through a hole in the back of the wall and like got.

Any germinator used that big word.

Yeah, And so it burrowed in the burrow and so did that and then he's like, I patched the hole all right, and then he laid out glue traps and was like, okay, cool.

So now we waked.

So I come home.

I come home and then I'm like, I'm like doom, scrolling on the couch, not looking at anything.

And that's when I see it.

And it's like it goes cuckoo, cock cuckoo, you know, like it's like, have.

You ever seen a mouse before?

I've seen a mouse before.

You've ever had a mouse in the house before?

Yes, I've seen a mouse.

I have usually separated by glass, but I have seen a mouse on TV.

And I was like on the internet I've seen.

I've seen lots of mice, you know, I like, I like Mickey Mouse, Like it's cool, you know, So I'm I'm.

It's make some noise.

If you ever had a mouse in your apartment, in your house, it sucks.

And I want to say it's everywhere.

I don't really know if it's everywhere, Okay, I really don't know.

I know it's definitely on this coast, especially in New York, especially by the restaurants as such, especially if someone's doing construction.

You can't help it.

It makes me so sad.

It makes me sad because I'm like, what have I done wrong in my life?

Also, don't they have nowhere to go?

Right?

Like, finding a mouse when you're single makes you want to marry the wrong person.

You gotta start making decisions that you don't need to be making that.

No, truly, if you are dating the wrong person that is good with the mouse, you will marry that person because you can't live like this, right, very true, lady, hard It feels emotional.

So anyway, we see the mouse, and so the glue traps, we're gonna let it the glue traps either thing.

And now at some point, you know we're watching something.

We're watching the Feud.

We're watching the Triman Compone.

No, it's the Trimant Capote show.

And it's like about swans.

How are we Yeah, gimme trup CAPONI dang all right, So we're watching the show and then she just bolts upright and she goes check the oven drawer.

New York is just no.

I was right, so yeah, in the house anyway, I opened the drawer and then the mouse is like, yeah, like, oh shit, it's stuck in a glue trap.

Oh no, in a glue trap.

And a glue trap.

I don't know if you know this about glue traps.

You probably do, but glue traps rip a mouse apart, yes, and so and so I was like, I like, you know, then my kids are like, don't kill it, you know, And I'm like, are they paying the mortgage?

Yeah?

And by the way, it's the cutest mouse I've ever seen in my life.

No, it's cute.

It's got little like beady eyes, but you can see the whites of the eyes.

And I'm like, what in the cartoon rat is happening?

Oh my?

It was really cute.

And uh, I was like, you a minute.

Well, it presented.

It presented an argument, which is, why do we kill mice that come into the house, but then people go to a pet store and buy mice?

What the fuck?

I didn't understand that.

I don't get it.

I don't get it.

If they come from a pet store, you feed them.

If they come to your house, you kill them.

So it's like, you're fucked if you're a mouse.

So what I what do I do?

I pick up I pick up the glue trap.

I walk it to the park and uh but.

I was like, okay, I'm like the BFG to this mouse.

You know what I'm saying.

So the big friendly, the big friendly giant.

You gotta you gotta read your rowl dom on the fuck is stay up?

All right?

So anyway, my neighbor, my neighbor comes by.

My neighbor's like, you don't And I was like, just get in the mouse in the park.

He's like, can you do that ten blocks from here?

Please?

So I was like, all right, So I walked the mouse ten block So.

What what in the green miles for a mouse is going on?

So I get it.

I get it most of the way off and then its tail is still stuck to this thing.

Yes, so I say, does the tail grow back?

A mouse's tail does not grow back.

I know a fox's tail doesn't grow back, audience, does a mouse's tail grow back?

Exactly?

Thank you so much.

Uh so it doesn't grow back.

So I was like, I was like literally talking to the mouse at this point.

I was like, mouse, you might have to lose your tail, but I hope you learned a lesson, you know, like, you guys want to know how this ends.

Or what the fuck?

I don't know.

I'm compelled.

This is compelling, felt all right, all right, are you guys thoroughly grossed out.

At this point?

Yes, but also we need to know how it's all right?

So anyway, I scrape it off.

The tail comes loose.

The mouse is like, comes loose, it comes off.

I get it all the way off.

I get it all the way off, all the way off.

The mouse looks back at me and was like, thank you.

You know what I'm saying, and then he scurried off into the fucking.

That was more compelling than a Tyler Perry movie.

Yeah, and I don't again.

In turn, I don't again.

I'm not a killer.

I'm not a killer.

Because I've killed the mouse before and it's not cool.

Man, Okay, you are so disturbing.

I've never had a cat, but I did put this in season one of Survival of the Thickest available on Netflix, thinking so.

Much wow writing season two.

Now, Oh, I had a roommate.

She did love the olive oil.

That was so fucking real.

She had an all white cat named Cocaine that was also real.

He had one blue eye, one red eye.

I was like, this is the devil.

And I've never lived with a cat before, because you know, I just know happy people and just kidding.

I know, I'm not gonna talk politics, Okay.

Controver this album.

And so the cat was like cuckoo for coca puffs, like didn't want you to hold it, but like would just jump on you when it wanted.

I would wake up.

It would like be on top of my foe and I'm like what, Yeah, would take my bonnet off in the middle of the night.

I'm just like, how fucking dare Cocaine get too sassy?

Figured out how to like open the bathroom door like was wild, and I was like, that cat's gonna steal my soul.

And we lived on fifty six between ninth and tenths, so it's the theater district as restaurants.

The rats are bigger than most of the chihuahuas, that's right.

A Hefty said, I don't want to like, you know, we're yeah, I don't want to like shame size this rat.

But this rat could have been eaten less.

A rat came into our second floor apartment.

I don't know fucking how Okay, there's a stranger in my house.

Thank you to Maya.

And my roommate, who was pretty useless, just don't know.

I was like, I want this pitch around when the apocalypse goes down, because she was always so fucking useless, like couldn't even.

Like cut bread truly.

She was like, uh, but aren't all knives for bread if it's a bread?

And I was like, okay, stop.

So anyways, it was just the rat came in.

Cocaine was like the fuck and she just grabbed a broom.

Didn't even know we had a broom.

She had a broom.

She like a fucking hockey player.

Just hit the rat into the bathroom.

She goes, cocaine go, cokain was like say less, what and then she closed the bathroom door with the broom and I was like the funck And all you heard was oh And I just held my ears and rocked myself, like, oh my god, bye bye Miss America.

Oh that's where I go.

That's why I don't It could have been three minutes or thirty minutes, I don't know, but we heard then.

Oh, she knew when to open the door.

They had been living this life together.

This was not the first.

Time, this was not the last.

This is what happens when nobody asked for a fucking security deposit.

You that part, that part.

Molly, you went danger girl is though.

She opens the door.

Yes, cocaine tail up, happy as fuck, used to be white now with shades of pink boo, the head in its mouth, plipped it on my pillow.

That's been our show.

She goes, I'm jealous.

That means he loves you, and I was like, I.

Have to move.

Oh my god, Oh my god.

We should we should just start?

Yeah, yeah, you guys write for more show?

Are you ready?

Oh my god, I'm so excited about this show.

What this fucking lineup?

Planet's so woke, it's so nice.

I love it.

God, I can't say well, what do we say about She's amazing.

She is an amazing musician.

Yes, amazing, more than that, you know, amazing songwriter, fifty million albums soul.

Excuse me, excuse me.

She's about to go on tour and you better see her.

But you guys see her here first.

Please put your hands together for no a joke.

Norah Chones, Norah Jones in the building.

Hi, I'm sure you've heard many stories about people having sex to your music.

It's true.

I have, Yeah, I have one.

Are you gonna tell me what I'm gonna tell you?

I've been waiting for this moment.

For so long staring her eyes.

Do you ever date like a very short person?

And I am a very short person, But.

You ever date someone that you know is like not necessarily your type, but you just love being treated like a queen.

And it wasn't that he was short, like I literally had to pick him up sometimes, and I was like, and he had a very hairy back even though he was bald.

It was weird and shame.

We loved your music.

I still love We loved your music, okay, and we were doing it to your music and I was on top and I was really feeling myself because I didn't need to do much because he was so tiny, and I was really feeling myself.

And then he goes, stop, you're hurting me, and I was like, that's not nice, and so I tried to just go to sleep, and I fell asleep in my ear and got caught in his back hair.

So anyways, North Jones, so nice to see you.

I've never had it's a space.

I've never had sex to your music, but I have made love to your music, just so you know, just so you know, wife's in the audience right now.

Oh my goodness.

I just I've never had sex to my music.

Not even by accident in rotation.

No, that would be a deal breaker.

Oh, I got it.

Some women play their music when they get birth.

Anyways, when did you learn to trust your intuition?

Sorry, I'm taking a pivot.

That's it.

I think my mom is really strong, so I think she's always kind of had that influence on me.

But yeah, probably when I was making my first record, I think, because there were a few turns and dips and yeah, hits and misses before we finally put it all together.

Did you have to fight or like learn how to fight?

For something that you believe should be in it.

Did you have to learn how to advocate for yourself and why you think something's important or was it more like a collaboration.

I mean it all, it's always a collaboration playing music with people.

But I definitely did have to trust my gut.

There were a few things that happened that I wasn't sure I loved as much, and that I just didn't know what to do about it, and then somebody else said that.

I was like, yes, that's right.

Yeah.

Then I was like, oh, yeah, okay, I know this is my thing.

Yeah, so I should do what I think is appropriate.

Are you a shy person?

Yes?

And no?

Not with my friends.

No, not with friends?

Like how are you among your friends?

Are you?

Depends on how many drinks I've had?

Okay, okay, what's what's your favorite drink?

If you were a drink, what would you be like?

I would be confused.

I don't know that sounds like a good drink.

I like wine, I like alcohol whatever.

All right, it's changed.

Over the years.

Yeah, what was it?

And what does it become?

Used to be?

Vodka?

Martiniz?

I can't do that, Oh my god.

Not if I want to remember what happened.

No, no, I can't.

I can't.

My tires don't way down.

Yeah, what was your college drink?

I didn't drink a lot in college.

I drink a little.

I drink a little.

I drank a little.

Someone says, what I was underage?

Oh I'm just kidding.

Wow, Well that doesn't stop people.

I had beer.

I had some beer and I barfed, and then I had some white Russians and I barfed, and I think so I didn't really drink till I moved to New York.

Yeah, I get that.

Yeah, yeah, I definitely got blackout at Club Cameos, Miami.

We used to call it Camo Hose because it was free before midnight.

On Peach Snaps with Hennessy's Gross.

I used to do a Goldschlager and feel like a millionaire.

Is it real?

Goal?

Yeah?

It is twelve carrot will fuck you up.

It's yeah, pretty, it's still pretty.

Yes, Uh that's interesting.

So you now now you're a wine drinker, of course, like you're.

I'm a grown up woman, grown up?

Yeah?

Absolutely, yeah, Red White Rose, who are you?

Are you?

Her?

Samalia?

I want to know what are you Somalia.

I defense okay, fair, fair, fair, fair friends on the meal.

What's it like on the road.

It's fun.

Yeah, I like being on the road.

You do, I do, but use.

My toilet.

And my husband and kids.

But yes, because you're most of all your toilet.

Have you been to Japan because the toilets there are really great?

No, but I have a Japanese toilet.

Oh well, then there you go.

You should have missed your toilet.

Yeah.

Yeah, it's my best friend.

Are you okay?

Someone just fell?

Someone fell?

People always followed our show.

Yeah, it's a thing.

Are you okay?

You'll get up, It'll be great.

We're gonna move on.

I have to ask though, like, okay, so you said you were talking about your first album and you developed intuition there.

What about this album do you feel as though it's like the maximum expression of that confidence that you have in yourself, like in this album or was it collaborative?

What was it like?

Yeah, it was very collaborative with my producer, Leon Michaels.

But yeah, I feel very free linking music.

There's not a lot of sun nice.

Well, there's no pressure anymore because I'm like, all right, I'm good.

I you know, you're proving yourself.

I did a thing you did and that's over and now I'm doing littler things.

Yeah, and that's fine.

Do you ever play for your kids at all?

For them for their amusement?

Yeah?

I don't know.

Well, you have to tell everyone what kind of kids you have.

They're seven and ten and they're funny.

They play for me.

Oh shit, that's yeah, play for me for me?

Like for me?

What did they play?

What?

What instruments?

Are they any good?

Do they have it?

Or they have the confidence down?

Oh?

Okay, they are.

They are.

They're just really little, you know, they just they haven't really worked very hard at it, but they got the confidence.

So they are American children.

Yeah, understood.

Yes, you're from a musical family.

Now what like, what if you want to do something else besides music?

Would you be like the odd one out?

Or to be okay, what if you got into music and it like didn't work out?

Would they'd be like, girl, what are you doing with this music?

Should?

I don't know?

I don't know what I would do?

Really?

No, have you ever pondered anything other than music?

And if if so, not even astronaut or like you know, I mean I.

Wanted to be a princess when I was six or what happened, but.

Like a Megan Markle type probably.

Yeah, I wasn't thinking.

I wasn't thinking which country.

But just.

Know I'm gonna be honest.

I don't know what the fuck I would do if I couldn't tell jokes.

Do you have another backup back?

I can actually I can paint porn hop porn.

No, just like like a sad, sexy woman telling jokes, which is like every comment like on Netflix ig page.

Anyways, can you tell us about your partner?

He's a musician and yeah, yeah, and how'd you know?

It was l v E.

I think you just know?

Yeah, don't do like, how did you how did you all meet?

Can you tell us that.

We met on a gig?

On a gig?

Yeah, it was a tribute show for Bob Dylan and I was singing one song We're playing just like a woman, and he played the organ part and I turned around and I winked at him and.

He's like, I know you better get it.

Yeah.

He was like, wow, I have a chance.

But turns out I have like a nervous tick where it blink a lot, and I was really just like turning away from the audience to get a little blanket.

So but because well, no, he knows this, and so because of that, he yeah, he talked to me more.

And then I was like, oh, you're so cute.

Oh, I mean, that's a great song to meet, you know, have me cute?

Like ye, she breaks just makes a little girl.

Yes, Oh god, I wish I met my wifeter that song.

That's fucking awesome.

What song did you mean it was?

I think it was.

It was the song song I think it was, which is no less romantic, you know what I'm saying.

No less romantic, no less romantic.

Same energy.

Yeah, same energy.

Oh my gosh.

I love that.

And can I ask what was your dating history before you met him?

I was kind of a serial monogamous, okay honestly, yeah, yeah, I had some fun.

You had some fun, but mostly long term.

Okay, did you have to break up with anyone in general?

Yeah?

When you were dating them?

Oh yeah, that's the worst.

How'd you do it?

Was it like firing someone from a job.

I don't know.

I just I'm sorry, I don't know, I don't know.

I love you, I know, I don't know.

It's like the worst way you could possibly break up with somebody, confuse the hell out of them.

Wait, I heard that you went to Arts Magnet in Dallas.

Yeah, okay, I'm from Dallas.

Oh, no one ever reps our city at all.

So thank you very much, thank you for being from Are you from Dallas proper?

Or are you from I grew up in grape Vine and then I went to Hey wait wait, I went to high school though in Dallas.

I'm not.

That's very judging.

No cut out, No, I was not.

I would never cut you off.

You're from Dallas, this is great?

No, wow, Okay, so rape Vine everybody has Grapevine Mills, which is a very big outlet mall, and that's that's a big fucking deal.

Now in Dallas, it's different than that, much different.

Mine is north of the city and different from Dallas.

However, she went to Arts Magnet, which is the same school that like Eric Abadou went to.

So they just produced icons, that's all they do.

That's so cool.

Did you like Arts Magnet you loved it?

Yeah?

Yeah.

Arts schools are so fun.

It's all the weirdos come together and make art.

Oh I love that, did you I try to pierce my nose.

When I was sixteen, same energy, same saying.

I went to Catholic high school.

It's all like, you know what I mean?

And I would get fingered a lot because Jesus, you know, I.

Couldn't have sex.

I dated a girl that went to Arts Magnet and uh, did you graduate ninety seven?

Yes?

Do you know?

Do I know her?

Uh?

Tell me about stix?

What's it?

Went on for about a week, week and a half and that was basically it.

But all that to say, Arts Magnet is a great school, and it's so cool that you went there.

And by the way, did you go to you and t too?

You went to the university?

Okay, the University of North Texas.

Were you in the one o'clock band or what?

No?

I was in the four o'clock band?

What has happened there?

Did you?

Guys?

People can be from the same town.

Guys.

Everybody's like getting quiet, buttholes are tightening, all right, listen.

I just love that you got up on it.

You really meant it.

I meant it.

He was like Joe Clark and what's that movie?

Thank You?

When people talk about Texas New York, it's to like fucking talk about New York against Texas.

No, I like to learn about different countries.

You're for church fucking Texas.

You're about it for countries.

Okay, I love no country for all men.

You ever go back to Texas, I have to know if you ever go back to Texas.

I don't have family there, so they got out.

It's it was.

It was always just my mom anyway, and she's up in New York now, so oh nice, I need to get back there.

Oh yeah, Oh I love that.

Yeah, you're in New Yorker now, though you pay New York taxes exactly.

It's given cool Brooklyn.

I didn't say I was going to live there, but but to often.

Yeah, in the outskirts.

That's cute.

Yeah.

Man, I've got a lot of friends from high school and college that i'd like to go spend time with.

Oh you still like you still like your college friends?

A couple?

It's nice.

No, there's a lot.

I mean, you don't have any you know.

It's it's a it's a circle.

It's the peripheral circle of crazy.

You know.

I feel like some people.

I don't understand being the cool person in high school or college.

I barely could finish Friday Night Lights.

I heard it's great, so.

I don't and they still like relive those moments and there's still like that person to still want to hold on to that, and I'm I want to get out, I want to see things, I want to meet people, I want to taste different things, and so, yeah, we kind of grew apart and I do miss them, But I think maybe I just missed like nineteen ninety five to two thousand and five more because that's when hip hop was really doing it.

Saying I get it, it's true.

You know what I mean.

But did you ever I'm the stage mishaps, like, have you ever had.

To really use the bathroom in the middle of a show?

Yes?

Number one right now?

But okay, number two.

No, I mean not a number two, thank god, let's hope that doesn't happen.

But number one.

Well, I did have pretty bad food poisoning once and if I was going to barf on everybody, oh.

My god, but I didn't, thank thank God.

A true soldier, true.

Singing your bar feet.

Have you ever had a missap where you've like forgotten a lyric in the middle performance and you just.

End up kind of making one up.

Oh nice.

This person could not believe that.

Yeah, yeah, you have to just sing gibberish otherwise, yeah it's jazz man, it's not good.

Yeahs, yeah it's an original.

Or if they do know, then they're like, that's so funny.

I don't know, it's not that many.

I love that though.

What is your routine before you have to do a big ass show?

I warm up and I have like a tiny little shot of whiskey, not too much because you get bad.

It's bad.

Yeah.

I feel like, not just America, but the world is such a shit show right now.

War, poverty, imperialism, colonialism, misogyny, transphobia, homophobia, and forgot gentrification.

Thank you so much.

Yeah.

The more I talk to people of all different just all different generations, They're like, we're always gonna have to go through something.

Just get through it.

How do you?

I mean, not only stay positive, but like, why is music and the arts important?

Sometimes I wonder if it is, because you know, I feel so small, like I'm not doing anything important sometimes, But then I listen to music and it makes me feel better other people's music, So I'm like, all right, well, if it feels good to me, then maybe and also making it feels really good.

Yeah, but sometimes I you know, I feel tiny.

But it is important.

I do think it's important.

It's important.

But I feel small, you know what, a.

Humble little nugget, because you are so You're just so amazing.

You're such a force, and so for you to say I feel small.

Well, you know.

I mean, you know, don't you Sometimes when you're reading the news and you're like, oh shit, I don't know what I'm gonna do.

What I am about it?

Well, that's the thing too, right, Yeah, Like I don't know why there's money for game shows but there's no clean water in Flint, Michigan.

I'm like, what the fuck are we doing?

You've got to change that, You've got to show what are you going to do?

I know I could barely find a clean au pair underwear, turned it inside out and everything.

So we get questions from the audience.

We get questions from the audience, and we answer them yes as best we can.

Then and we clean our underwear.

We're going to need your advice on these questions, that's right, honey.

Okay, So is it not adult or weird not to tell your husband when you look at porn Hub.

Oh wait, what.

Is it not?

Adults?

Is it not grown up or mature to keep it a secret from your spouse that you're looking at porn hub.

I don't think it's not mature.

I think it's just it's probably nicer if you tell them.

He'd probably be kind of into it, don't.

You think, Yeah, sure.

Maybe do it with you.

I'm not sure, but I've heard that there's rumors that are on the website pornhub.

Porn hub isn't porn hub a hub of porn that there is a share choice, like you can share a share option, so you know I want to share that.

I mean, king, just like I don't even know who you are.

I'm just a guy who knows this about porn hubb you from experience, just from anecdotal evidence.

I mean, you know, there's two parts to it, right, So it sounds like there's a bit of maybe shame involved, And there shouldn't be any shame with pleasing yourself in a safe way, So like you can just have your me time and do whatever the fuck you want to do.

But if you want to do something with your booboo, you could just say, you know what, I like The first.

Ten seconds of this in the last twenty seconds of that.

So here, so why I've heard don How you feel about that?

How you feel?

I agree?

I think I think that you.

I mean, I'm going to get out everybody.

Could they go home and get a porn of account and share a.

Share shared No, a shared porn account is like, like, how cheap are you?

Okay?

Next question, this is a two parter.

How do ideas come to you?

How do you channel the energy to turn an idea into work?

Nora?

Yeah, please, I don't know.

You just hope that you're conscious when they come to you?

How did they come to you this time around?

They come to me when I have silence, which is in the bathtub, yes, cool, in the car by myself, or meditating, or like falling asleep, and that is it.

There's no other silent times.

Do you meditate your I try, I don't.

I don't always succeed.

Okay, Yeah, I meditate before Ben meditate ye with like two and a half to three and a half glasses of rose on ice and a little bit of it edible, not too much, just a little bit, just to keep the dreams nice.

When do ideas come to you?

The Michelle, when do your like joke ideas?

Yeah, I mean.

It feels like I never sleep like I will wake up with an idea.

I have an idea, like while you guys are saying something like yeah, I just it doesn't Yeah, I mean, and also I think with ideas every dinner party I've been to everyone's God, yeah, and I'm so happy for you.

But do something with it, you know, I.

Always say, don't tell yourself no before someone else tells you no.

Your idea could be ship, but at least it's finished, and that's better than any fucking thing else.

You know what I mean, Just fucking do it.

Just get it done.

Yeah, but don't send it to me.

Okay, I won't.

I won't do Did you want to answer the question or can I go?

I love it?

Please go ahead?

Okay, great?

Thanks?

My second, my second that emotion, favorite guilty pleasure.

Oh pleasure shouldn't be guilty that part, that part, baby, so go on pouring up all you want.

No, no, we're not saying that, we're not sponsored.

Now there's an idea, all right, Nora?

What is your favorite guilty pleasure?

What do you what do you like to I always have a hard time with this one.

Yeah, because then I feel like bad saying it's guilty.

Yeah, like I'm insulting it.

Yeah.

I think it's going to target and buying shit I don't want.

I don't know if it's a guilty pleasure or toxic trait.

I do plenty of that online, just like karting stuff and then not buying it.

Yes, but I hate when I go back and it's not there anymore.

Just leave it there.

I want to see it again.

You have to make an account, don't, but don't email me.

I forgot something.

I didn't forget I left it there.

I want to go back when I'm ready.

The fuck.

I don't have to see that I forgot it.

I know where it is.

I have the weirdest I have.

I guess I have one.

I have one guilty pleasure, and I'll share it with I've never done.

This is about Is this a safe space?

I feel like can I share?

Okay?

Well, the conductors on trains in New York have to, like they go to that certain spot where it's like this ebra stripe thing, and I will sometimes high five them.

They put their fingers out nice.

That's a that's like what that's really.

Nice, and they're like, what the fuck, Like, I'm going to do it, skip away.

It's fun.

You should do it.

Oh my god.

I I'm just let you know when you know someone.

But you keep learning things.

This one is for you.

It's got your name on it.

Norah, how have you learned to let go of regret?

What the fuck.

Have any regrets?

Really?

I don't have that many.

God, you don't even get drunk to say something that you shouldn't have said.

Oh that's different, that's just like being drunk.

Yeah, I was just drunk.

I'm like groundhog Day.

I wake up every day a new day.

Yeah.

I like that.

Yeah, yeah, sorry when I was drunk.

Yeah, okay, sorry.

What do you do when you promised yourself that you were going to enjoy the single life after a breakup but end up finding someone you're very into?

Oh and there sounds like you're a serial monog Also, finding someone you like shouldn't be your guilty pleasure.

We just talked about that, right, So, like, if you're into it, enjoy yourself.

But are you into it because you're really into it or you into it because you don't want to be alone?

Learn how to date?

Yourself close that I married a serial monogamous and I was like, why, wow, wait, wait a minute, now, what are we doing?

That's hard?

That is really hard.

I mean, enjoy the person because I'm sure they don't know that much like they don't know that you're feeling.

Some probably serial monogamists tend to share a lot, you know, yeah, yeah.

Who wrote this question?

Just kidding.

I'm sure they feel like you're the best thing that ever happened to them.

So it's like, you know, you never know when things are going to happen.

There's no good good time for anything, you know, and so you just gotta kind of like not put your head around it so much and maybe just more put your arms around it, you know.

Ooh, well, I also think I've been there, by the way, But I think if you just be honest with them and say, really, I need a little space to you know, find myself for a minute, and can we keep in touch and talk soon and if it's meant to be, I mean, go off to wherever you want to go for like a month and come back and maybe he'll stop be into you.

I assume you're a woman, you have.

A obviously you have a great voice, and I feel like someone with your voice said that to someone, they'd be like, okay, but you.

Know you strongly disagree.

Yeah, I'm like, wow, Nora Jones said that to me, I'd be like, all right, I'm out.

Of here, you know, I get on my Harley and go, yeah I would.

I mean, I give you the worst advice, yes.

But well told, it's so good.

That's all that matter.

That's what politicians do.

Yeah, okay, advice for someone who wants to become a parent soon but is an artist who is not struggling but is still trying to find a landing place in their career slash entertainment industry.

Same stitch for my partner.

So basically, they're doing okay as an artist or entertainer.

All right, we get it.

You're fucking doing well, and they're wondering whether or not a bambino would ruin all of it.

And oh yeah, thank you for I was like, subtitles, I have to translate what you.

Have to translate for like Brooklyn, liberal arts, educated people, they like sniff eat around the cookie, like just fucking get to it, you know what I'm saying.

They're like, baby or not should have get off the pot.

They're like, in this hour of my life, in this season, who am I as I write this with Quill and Ink in the Berkshires, fucking get to it?

Time is ticky talk short, I'm just channeling you at this point, but.

No, you're not.

Come on.

You know what, this actually makes me really sad because I've had this conversation with people before.

When you're an artist and you live your life, it only adds to your creativity, you know, to say that you're on a timeline or should I do something?

I mean to me, it's just still giving an unrealistic, patriarchal standard of bullshit.

We don't have to look a certain way, we don't have to be a certain age to have made it.

Our partner doesn't have to look like X, Y and Z.

And anytime you feel like you want to have a kid or a dog or a pet, turtle, whatever the fuck it is, we've gotten that question before you fucking do it, and you know it'll work out, like it'll always work out, And so if you want to go ahead and do it.

It's easy for us to say, but do make a mess of your life, because you'll probably have more to talk about as an artist.

Oh my god, I'm just.

Saying, but don't have a kid because you want something to talk about.

I've had that conversation.

A friend asked me, should I have a kid, because it feels like all the popular female comedians have kids, and that's why I don't have no friends.

Nora, But what says?

What say you say?

I liked your answer.

I agree, Yeah, yeah, just do it.

I mean it's hard, it's not easy.

It's not did anyone say no, you have like a tour coming up, you have an album coming up, like maybe you should like postpone, like whatever birth plan you have.

No, You're like good, She's.

Like, I'm in a lucky position.

I mean you're doing well.

I did really well before I had kids, so I felt like, okay, yeah, and it was still hard and it still is hard.

Hard.

It's still hard balancing everything.

It's impossible.

Like what what do you do to try to balance it all?

I just try to make a schedule that makes sense.

Yeah, it never does.

Definitely never knows.

The balance is that there is no balance.

Yeah, you like, you'll never find it up, You'll never find you take what you need.

Yeah, it's like like I have legit said I need to go away for four hours and watch this whole season of Love is Blind.

I'll be back.

I'm gonna order food on Uber Eats.

It'll come up, y'all eat it.

You do this, I'm gonna do that.

I just want to look at the screen and see what everyone's.

Fucking talking about.

There, you have it.

That's balance, bitch.

Okay.

Last question, would you fly to Paris to meet up with the person you've dated for two months?

Yes?

Yeah, yeah, I mean what you guys?

Life is short.

We're not promised tomorrow.

We're never gonna have all the money we fucking want.

Make a fucking memory, live life.

That's romantic, you know.

What a flex?

Yeah, god do it.

But definitely get a hotel that's like eight stars or more.

Because I.

Went to Paris thought it was fancy.

I was shitting in a hole.

I said, what the fuck is this?

I said, what the fuck is this?

This is a hole in the ground.

What in the slum dog millionaire are we doing?

Sammy Schelle, my ass?

What the fuck?

Anybody else want to ass on stage or no?

I like, I liked your answer.

I would only say, like, you know, be a little cautious, like eight weeks is not that long, and they're like, come to Paris, like it's the eighteen hundred's, you know, like relax, find.

Out more, maybe a couple of questions.

No, that's when you find it out on that trip.

Let me tell you something.

If I would have seen my husband open up a cereal box, I probably wouldn't have married him.

Does he do it from the bottom fucking ill?

He doesn't, like he's.

Trying to find an answer.

He's like, and I can never put it back.

It's gone forever.

No, I understand that.

I get that now.

I get that now.

So we ask all our all our guests, Yes, what is the most adult thing you want to do for yourself that you haven't had time to do yet.

It could be big or small.

Like someone said, see a baseball game in Japan, I said, makes seladdressing.

It's very hard just for yourself.

Yeah, for yourself, for yourself.

I think I want to go watch five Hours of Love is Blind by myself.

Now I think I owe it to myself.

You do, honey, Yes, tell everybody about your tour.

Oh me, yeah, I'm gonna go on tour.

Thank you?

Oh wow?

I know, I know, I know, come on, I know.

That was so cool.

That was so cool.

This is really fun.

That's the cool ship about this show.

That's the cool thing about creating something like this and like kicking with you doing that, connecting with people and then Naa fucking Jones shows up.

Okay, here's a moral of the story, because I gotta go, because I gotta peek everyone if you can work with your friend, your talented friend and do something you love, because that is the dinner party that never stops giving.

So thank you, Jordan, thank you for being a friend, traveling down the road and back again.

Your heart is true and I gotta go.

I gotta pee no do that.

Bye everyone, Bye, don't forget to No, no, no, no no.

This has been an exactly right production.

Our senior producer is g Howley.

Art Associate producer is Christina Chamberlain.

This episode was mixed by John Bradley.

Our guest booker is Patrick Cotner.

Additional production support from Hannah Kyle Crichton.

Theme song and live show DJing is by DJ Don Will.

Our live producer is Makala Konozovich.

Artwork by Jamie Bechtel.

Photography by heis vander Most.

Executive produced by Karen Kilgera, Georgia Hartstar and Daniel Kramer.

Follow the show on Instagram at Adulting the Pod.

Email your questions to Adulting Questions at gmail dot com.

Mmmmm