Hi, everybody, Welcome to AI t a pod.

I'm Danny Vega joining you know her, you love her carlas you know, not the asshole and returning to the show.

It's dandy a Valise.

I have a question, why do you always say you know her, you love her to Carla?

Do people not know and love me too?

Well?

This is like it's like Carla's four hundredth.

I wonder what episode it really is?

At least at least ten.

Yeah, like.

I think I'm at fifteen.

Maybe, Oh, it's a mystery I have and I'm the asshole story.

Wait where you are?

Yeah, I mean it's not that big of a deal, but it was, well, actually multiple, there's multiple assholes.

So I went to see Eddington, which I recommend for the film fans.

It's ari Astra, he did rend Can you remind me what it's a movie?

Did you mean Paddington paper?

Paddington too is fucking fire?

Anyway, We go to the movie and yeah, it's at it's called The name of the theater is Burbank Town Center, correct six and Burbank, referring it to as Burbank Town Center.

So I tell my friends I bought all the tickets sent me just here or whatever.

So we go and the show starts at six twenty.

It's six eighteen, and my friend's like, I'm here outside.

I'm like, no, you're not.

You're not outside because i'm outside, So how are you outside?

If I'm outside, we're both outside.

You're not outside.

It's also not outside, it's inside, so you're not inside.

And he's like, no, dude, I'm literally outside the Burbank Town Center.

And I'm like, you're not fighting me, like you know, and so I'm just getting riled, like I'm literally thinking like this fucking moron.

And he was at the mall for like an hour before He's like, I've just been browsing up Barnes and Noble.

I'm like, you're a fucking idiot.

I'm having all these thoughts.

I'm like, you're fucking idiot.

You are at Bars and Noble and you what you should have been doing is getting to the gate on time.

Right.

First you get to the gate, right, you guys know, I'm sorry about at the airport.

Then you go to Cinnabon.

You don't go to Cinnabon and then find the gate, right, what are you fucking stupid?

Yeah, So I'm literally like just ripping them apart in my head.

And then he's like, I'm literally at the burbanktown Center eight, and I'm like eight.

And then we realized there's two.

They're a lyric called Burbak Belt Center six and Burbaytal Center eight.

I'm like, that's the most psychotic, confusing system.

And there's also sixteen.

Is it also called town Center?

I don't know if it's sixteen, but it's in that same little thing.

There are three AMC's in one mall in LA and that should be illegal.

And so anyway, he gets there just on time.

And this is the part where I fucked up for whatever reason, whatever insane demon enter my body.

Instead of like a normal person getting four four seats in a row, the picture made it look kind of narrow, so I weirdly got two seats in one row and then two seats in front.

Oh, in a different row, okay, because I thought, well, people want to be in the center, and it's not that important that were next to each other.

But naturally, like any humans who have ever been to a theater before, they sat next to us and they're like, oh whatever, we'll figure it out.

And we did, but it was just like so long of an interaction to be like, well, actually we reserved those seats, but like we're trying to sit together, but those seats are actually better if you want to sit there.

And then just like all my friends be like no, no, no, we'll leave, we'll leave it.

Then the guy's like no, i'll le, I'll go.

It's i'll leave, we'll leave, I leave, I leave, and it's literally going on so long, and it was all my fault.

That's so funny because yesterday at the premiere, we went to go do the Q and A and when I put my stuff down, there was two set seats next to each other that Eric was like, oh, we save these two seats for you and Danny, and I was like, okay, cool.

We did the thing, and when we can came back from the Q and A, people had moved over and separated those two seats, so like one was in the middle of two other people and the other one was down at the end.

And I was like oh.

And then I looked at my friend and I was like I kind of wanted to sit next to Danny and they were like.

Okay, you can.

Well, well, okay, we'll move and then I was like okay.

So I was like standing there.

She's like, well, I meant the other way, but I'll move this way, and I'm like okay.

So then they moved the other way and then I sat down and I was sitting next to you and Violet, and I was like.

Was that an asshole move?

Like?

Should I have just sat where the seat was availing me?

And then I said, I was like, oh, I'm sorry.

Was that weird?

She's like, no, I don't care.

I don't care.

But I was like that felt like unnecessary for me to do.

I should know.

I sat down.

It's fine because like number one, like, you know, it's something we worked on.

Well, that's what I'm saying.

That's why I thought it was weird that there were literally two seats there and then there's apart.

I think they just didn't want to sit next to Alejandro honestly because they didn't know him.

Not a bad person.

But I was like, just that's weird that you like left two empty seats away from each other versus sweet Alejandro.

Yeah.

Anyways, so it's like it can become a thing.

Yeah, It's like, here's the thing, guys will do.

Sometimes they like, say there's three urinals, a guy will take the middle urinal.

I'm like, see you're not thinking.

You're not thinking right, you need to take the wing then then we don't have to piss next to you.

Man.

Yes, yeah, you gotta have foresight that someone might also have to piss.

So what if the foresight is the middle urinal is probably the cleanest because so little people use.

It, because you're assuming that most men have the foresight.

No, that's crazy.

The middle is the most usul what most matter are stupid?

I have a potential.

Uh a, I t a, I haven't done it yet.

Can I say a joke about what we were just saying?

Really quick?

The same amount of people, the same amount of guys who have foresight, are the same amount who have their foreskin?

Oh my god, how do I know?

You weren so not worth it?

You backtracked us for a shitty foreskin.

Like four seconds.

Okay, Actually there was a weird This just brought me to a weird part of my childhood where my dad learned the word prep use, which is just means foreskin.

I've never heard it means the exact same thing as foreskin, which in English really and then he would just be like prep use, like he brought it up.

It was like a three week period when I was like fifteen.

Was he just trying to like relate.

I don't know what he was doing.

He also got really in a kiosk.

There was a kiosk era where my dad thought kiosk was such a funny word.

Interesting.

I wasn't down with, but prepuse, I was like, are we not?

I mean not?

Was he like talking about it because like he like I think he.

Had it or had word was just my dad is like a wordy guy.

Talk about your dad's foreskin.

Well he's not talking about his own foreskin.

No, I mean he would just say prep you.

I don't know how.

It was really hard.

I resurfaced that.

But people are really weird about foreskin.

Like I personally like, don't care.

I'm just like what a you got is what you got?

Like people have really hard opinions on it.

I don't think women should have opinions on it.

I feel like I don't say there.

Yeah, I got I got mad because I was like they did that to me, they took that away.

But you know, I've done research, and the research validates it.

It's most guys, like some guys.

There's there's people, I mean, there's people who say both.

But I'm more able, was more able to find guys who had their foreskin removed and said sex is way better.

Really, you could find the opposite.

You could find it the opposite.

Yeah, I mean, I know, you know, but.

It's good enough.

Can I say that I think sex is good enough?

If it could be like way better, that's fine, but like it's good enough.

I just want to say shout out to you know, whatever dick you have, it's good enough and whatever you know.

Oh for skin er.

No, sorry, I did not mean to trigger all of this.

No, it was weird.

I think it's conversation.

No one talks about it.

So weird.

Detail that I forgot my dad brought up prep use a lot for a minute.

The thing that I was gonna say was is a potential A.

I t A and we talked.

We actually talked about this.

Would I be the asshole?

So we have a mutual friend and it's not the same mutual friend.

I'm two friends.

But I have a very like sensitive sense of smell and like I like, I'm very like I can smell like when like something like I can sometimes smell what you've eaten or like what's going on.

It's like if it's radiating from your skin versus coming from your gut, you know, you know, like when there's bad breath that's from your gut, it's not even your mouth.

It's like if you say so.

Yeah, we have a friend that has now a gut like breath thing.

And I feel like I should tell them.

I don't know who this is.

Their breath is really bad?

Is it me?

No?

Okay, I'm blessed with that.

Yeah, I will.

I would let you know.

There's a couple people at our coories basically I ain't be using deodorant, and I've come really closest to I've come closed not to say something to them, but to say something to their friend, and being like can we say something because there was only a radius I.

Mean, not working out, just regular.

Were they But they work out and then they keep working and so and like here's the thing.

If you smell about at like two feet distance, that's like your personal bubble.

I would not really, but this person, it's like a radius I'm talking about like five feet away.

I'm like, what the fuck is that whoa.

No, I don't like that at all.

But also even in the two feet radius, I would say something.

So it's a gut mouth thing.

Because we talked about this on another thing where we were talking about body odor.

It was like, how come it's more acceptable to say that somebody had What did I say with Redio?

Was like, it's easier to say that someone you should put deodoran, or you should here's a piece of gum, versus you should wear deodorant.

I feel like it should always be acceptable to let someone know when they don't smell it, especially if you're close to them.

I feel like it should be like an obligation, like I would like to know if I smell bad.

Yeah, honestly.

But like this friend, like he's been having like serious like gut stuff for like a while, and I'm like, this is not good, Like you need to tone down the acid.

Like interesting, what is he eating?

Yeah?

I don't acid, I don't know, but like he even mentioned he's like, oh, my stomach carts.

I think it's because I had too much coffee.

And I'm like, yeah, interesting, He's like, you're telling me it's unhealthy to only eat good, to only eat lemons and coffee.

You're telling me that's unhealthy, that's too much acid, that's on health, like that old man breath.

You know.

It's like my husband sometimes and I'm like, eat bananas, like neutralize that acid because it's like I cannot, like I will not let you, like I tell him, and he doesn't love it, but I'm like, I will not let you walk outside with that smell.

Right, So I feel like should we tell like it would I be the asshole to tell?

Like some I like that said, And.

Now I know you have to know what I need to know who it is?

Off?

Yea, off the pod to give you the real answer, because I feel like that will give me some context.

But is it like affecting your conversation?

And it's just like it really is like bothering me, Like, yeah, I was with the I was with the person yesterday.

Okay it was I figured.

I was with the person yesterday, and I was just like this is like so intense and all I want to do is all I want to do is smash my head into a wall And did.

You reposition your body to get away from it?

But then, but then, but then they keep getting closer to me.

They don't know.

Oh wait, actually I don't know who we're talking about.

Oh wait I do, okay, I do it well.

Because there's somebody else that we were around yesterday.

Oh no, no, no.

But anyways, I think that you should tell them.

I think I'm going to.

Are they aware?

I think so this like there you know them, they're.

So you're saying their mouth is clean, but it's coming from yes.

The weird thing.

They mentioned it yesterday when we were at the theater and I was like, dog.

They were like, I think I had too much salt, Like my stomach cards have too much salt and coffee.

And I was like, yeah, like too much salt and coffee.

It's a really weird thing to say.

I don't know.

I just want to tell them because it's.

Like that's making my stomach card.

But I feel like there's like they're like they're but listen, I picture.

Them drinking the salt.

I just want to They are more sensitive than they let.

On, Like I about being told Yeah, because.

There was one time I told him I told him something very benign and then he said, well, yeah, like so and so mentioned that you were a little like in tense with me.

That day, and I was like, I was what did I say?

Like?

I was like, I was like, can you tell me what it is?

I said, so I could not say it again, you know God, and then like and so he was like, no, no, it's fine.

It's like it's nothing.

It's nothing, it's nothing.

But you know, like yeah, like blah blah blah.

I was like, just what is it?

So I don't do it?

I mean, I think it's hard because if it's not like a here's a breath mint versus you have to change your diet for a week in order to fix this thing.

I think it's also you could be like, hey, have you you know, instead of being like your breath smells, it could be like, hey, I'm worried that your health is not because you're a personal chef, you're like kind of a nutritional nutritional you're not.

But I feel like, you know and literate.

Well, as I tell my brother because he doesn't really exercise and he eats like trash.

Yeah, And I was like, you know, I'm not going to tell you what to do.

You're a grown adult, but like your body's going to tell you and you don't.

You don't really want to get the notification from your body.

Crazy what people can't tell their own smells, Like I always know when I smell.

Well, It's interesting because literally, like last week I said this at the co working space.

I was like, it was really hot last week, obviously, but I was like, I need to do like a juice cleanse or like a bone broth diet only or something, because I too.

I was like, I feel like I've been smelling faster because I will have like a light sweat bio smell when I swell, but then once I'm done sweating, it goes away.

You did say this to me, and my thought was I think you'd probably smell.

You just didn't realize it.

No, I did.

Yeah, No, that's what I'm saying.

I think I knew I was.

You could be stinky.

I knew I was stinking, but I was like, I don't stink a lot usually this quick, like usually it has to take a workout, Like it's not like me just being out, like it's just like a little off or something.

Yeah, Like I was like, I can I could feel it.

Oh, I'm out in the world for an hour and I'm like smelling and I haven't.

Done any the thirties are the time to optimize.

But yeah, you don't really want to get into it.

Our second story folks Ai ta boyfriend peede the bed and is mad at me for my response.

Oh no, but first, it's a listener's submission.

We just got those hot off the presses.

A it ta for having a new friend group.

Me eighteen f and my best friend Amy now former best friend also eighteen f have been friends for about three years.

We go to the same school.

We started to get super close in spring junior year slash summer going into senior year.

She has some qualities people would consider unlikable, self centered tendencies.

I never really cared because as long as I like my friends, it doesn't matter what people think.

September into my senior year, me and a group of girls who I meant, who I had never been close to I started spending a lot of time together due to mutual friends interests.

We all got along really well.

Me and one of the other girls were very close with Amy at the time, and Amy started to get jealous when we would go out with the other group of girls.

I could tell it made her upset, so I tried to invite her multiple times and had a few successful attempts, but most times the girl said they quote didn't want Amy around because all she talks about is guys.

I started to hang out with Amy alone because I figured everyone has their separate friendships and just because I have a new friend group doesn't mean I can't still spend time with Amy.

I proceeded to put as much time into Amy as into the friend group and try to run smooth sailing from there.

A few weeks into my new friend group, Amy randomly blocks me on Snapchat.

Oh.

I text her on I Message and she claims that I've been quote forcefully excluding her and that quote the girls wouldn't care if she came to anything.

I tried to explain to her that I've tried to invite her to activities with my new friend group and how I was sorry, but it's best that we just hang out by ourselves, and that they just don't like her.

I hated saying this because I never wanted to tell her, but obviously I had to explain why she wasn't included.

She refuses to believe me and proceeds to tell people around the school how I'm a horrible friend, untrustworthy, I ruined her life, ai ta.

I thought I was doing the best I could considering my friend group's views and amy situation.

We haven't been friends since Wait how old are they in?

Eighteen?

Okay, so they're probably still in high school.

Yeah, it sounds like they were finishing.

Oh yeah, Oh.

I was gonna say this is like every coming of each Yeah, it's like we should make up the opposite where she's leaving the conceited girl and going to a better friend group instead of the opposite.

But yeah, that's hard.

I mean, like, what do you say though, because.

It's like.

You can just keep like do you keep lying?

Oh no, it's where I'm not inviny for those reasons or those like you have.

Her say it?

But does she still like your friend?

She still likes her friend?

Right, it sounds like she.

Does, yeah, because she's just hanging out with her one on one now.

So me and my best friend since I was nine had a similar thing where one of like like the other group of friends that she hung out with they didn't like me m and like quite frankly, I didn't really like them either, but I didn't want to feel excluded, you know what I mean?

So, like her whole thing was like she would like maybe try to force it sometimes because she enjoyed being with me, sure, you know what I mean.

And I enjoyed being with her, and sometimes if it was an activity there, it's like we all want to go see movies.

She doesn't want to see the movie.

Twice, you know, like and bye Danny.

Like.

But the thing is that I knew what the deal was.

So I feel like if they're like close friends, like I mean, I guess, I don't know, did she say that she told her friend that, or she doesn't have the heart to tell her friend that they don't like her, I forget.

Well, she ended up saying it, right, Yeah, Okay.

So I feel like if she ended up saying it, and like, I mean, do we have like the friends reaction on it, well, I think it's hard to Like, I mean, she blocked her on Snapchat.

Yeah, eighteen is a.

Hard age for this because their frontal lobes not really dependent.

But they haven't had a whole life.

Happened when we were sixteen, So yeah, I mean, you're but we had a more secure, taluously.

More emotionally intelligent than a lot of people that I know.

I don't feel like OP did anything wrong.

I feel like it just they don't want you there.

It's like, and that's the thing too.

She kind of wasn't really thinking like, well, if I'm being not that's the thing too.

It always kind of bothers me.

It's like, well, did you ever think maybe you're not being invited because you did something?

Like if I if I was excluded, if I felt excluded, that would be my first question, like what happened?

Usually I'm like, they're exluding me?

Well, and then i think what did I do wrong?

And then I'm like, oh, it's probably that.

Yeah, Usually figure it out.

I had a different situation with a friend who became a new friend, and then I became friends with her.

We realized we had a mutual friend, and that case of us having a mutual friend made her hang out with our friend group more.

And then at some point it felt like the person I was friends with for ten years who was not the mutual friend, but was like the mutual friend's boyfriend.

Basically, they I would see them hanging out all the time, and I'm like, well, why am I not getting invited to this thing by my friend of ten years?

But this new friend is getting invited, okay.

And yeah, of course I brought it up and I was like, I brought it up, and I was like, I'm not gonna lie.

I'm like a little jealous, and I.

Don't know exactly why I'm feeling this way, but it did take a moment for me to be like, realistically, this new person is much better at hey, do you want to do this thing?

Hey, do you want to do this thing?

Creating invites and being present, whereas I'm really busy and a lot of the times my friend of ten years would be like you want to do this thing, and I'd be like, I can't today, I can't today.

So when I brought it up, I was like, hey, I want you to know I realize that I'm often very busy when you invite me to things, but I feel like you've been inviting me less and it hurts my feelings a little bit because I do still want to show up and I'll be better about also initiating hangouts, but like, I do feel some kind of way because now I'm seeing you hang out with this other person like all the time and they're new, and I don't feel like you even make that much effort with me anymore, you know.

What I mean.

So it was perfectly fine, and he was like, no, yeah, I just thought you were really busy and like she's always hitting me up to do that.

That's the same if you don't respond to someone's energy like I have.

I have people I'm like, i'll send you one invite, I'll send you two, but it's like you're not sending me any invites.

Yeah.

Sometimes people aren't even thoughtfully responding to my invites.

And I'm kind of like, so you think you're who you think you are.

Yeah, Like I gotta go knocking on your door again.

But I feel that way about people I'm not close with.

But this person is one of my best sure.

I was going to yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I just think with this though, like whatever you feel excluded.

First of all, let me say that I don't actually think this is an exclusion.

I've been chewing on this because we went through an exclusion based well, in other words, what what is excluding someone?

Excluding is mean?

Excluding is mean.

I don't think this quite qualifies because not inviting isn't the same as excluding.

Yeah, you know, it's like it gets blurry, It does get blurry, but I'm like, yeah, Like, for instance, I'm inviting my whole class except one person.

That's excluding.

That's cruel, that's really not fair.

You invite the whole class except one person.

That feels very personal.

But like I'm inviting four people to see a movie because I've bout four tickets, Well, what have you got a friend?

Group of five?

You know it was excluding?

Yeah, no, not necessarily though, that's just not inviting.

It's like you weren't invited because usually we don't fill all five.

Did you notify them?

Maybe they miss Like I don't know.

It kind of just depends.

It just gets a little hairy where I'm like to frame it as like why am I being excluded?

But like I do feel like it's a it's a thing like I've been thinking about this, Like there's this thing called fall.

I'll give you guys heard of that.

It's fear obligation guilt.

Oh interesting, And I'm like, anytime you're really approaching people with fog, it just like I'm like, maybe just take a second and don't just don't because if you're going to guilt someone.

But I do feel it's a fair thing to say, Like I feel excluded.

That's that's fair, that's how you feel, yes, but not I feel that you're excluding me.

It's like, well, I'm not excluding you, bro.

I recently say that with like some of our friends, like given the last conversation we had.

The friend where I'm talking about is hanging out with people that I introduced her to her and I introduced her to and they all like do things together constantly, and like I just feel like, oh, like I'm not like welcome in that space a lot of times.

And so I told our mutual friend.

I was like, hey, I've been feeling kind of like sad, and I made it about me.

I was like, I've been feeling kind of sad because I feel like you guys like do lots of activities that I know that I would like to be a part of, and I feel like there's like no intent to like invite me to these things, like whether it's karaoke or like you know, yeah, doing a hike or something like.

It's like you've invited everyone else, but like you didn't invite me.

And then she said, no, we don't mean to like she meant that.

She's like, yeah, you don't mean too.

We just all live so close together and you live all the way in Century City.

That's so there is a proximity.

That's it's not necessarily but she said, but she was.

Kind enough to be like, but I can understand why you feel that way, and like I will still like reach out, and she ever since then she had reached out more.

She's like, because we always want you.

There, like I do love you.

We invite sometimes that you just but I think it's good to check.

In, like because it was good for me to check it because I was like, am I are we good?

Especially given the circumstances.

I was like, am I?

Yeah?

I mean you know, yeah, So the way I think about socializing now so much is like always always try to bring positivity because that still does get a little guilty, Yeah, you know where You're like, I feel anytime I feel like you're kind of having a conflict, like you're kind of doing something wrong.

Whereas I'm like, you know, if I'm just like if I'm always inviting people to stuff, it's like it's going to come up.

And so I really find myself in a position I rarely feel like I'm not invited or included or even if it happens.

I would just text them and be like, yo, can I come, because it's like, well, obviously I can come.

They just probably forgot or whatever.

Yeah.

I feel like that's the same vibe with like these friends.

They're just like no, You're like always welcome.

It's just like we all like live down the street from each other, so it's right, yeah.

Yeah, but it's like, you know, a little like try to create momentum instead of fear, obligation and guilty whatever possible.

I think it's all too like whoever, it's out of sight, out.

Of mind for me sometimes, you know, absolutely, But like then again.

Like me and you, we live far away, but we still like you know, to a degree, Yeah, we haven't seen each other in a long time, but also I was out of town and then we were all both busy and we're far away.

But if I lived in your house obviously, but also even if you lived in your neighborhood, I think we would have seen each other a lot more than Yeah.

But going into the situation, I think so Amy Amy's described this self centered tendencies right, and it seems like OP tolerates it or is fine with it.

But like these girls have a pretty legit criticism.

I think we all know this person didn't want Amy around because all she talks about is guys, and it's kind of a thing.

It's like you're taking up all the energy with like this thing that's like it's just like not interesting, like it's draining.

Yeah, and I just feel like it's kind of like I feel like it's killing the messenger.

And I feel like people people now going to do this a lot.

Yeah.

Right, It's like he didn't really do anything, or she didn't really do anything.

She's just like, yeah, this is kind of what it is.

And I think that's fair.

I think it goes back to them just being eighteen.

But I don't think that the friend responded very well by going around and saying, Oh, this so and so who's supposedly my friend is actually a bitch and doesn't want me around anymore.

Because right, that's what OPI's friend that got excluded quote unquote started to do after she told her that her new friends didn't like her.

Yes, that I'm a horrible friend, untrustworthy are ruined her life.

I mean the other thing is too though, if like I don't know, like I was kind of just saying this that it's like if one of my friends has an issue with an other friend, but it's not like a substantial issue, right, Like it's just like, yeah, they're kind of annoying.

I'm like, Okay, I'm not gonna not invite them because you find them annoying.

Hey, I like it.

They're annoying, and then we make fun of them behind their back.

That's the whole fun of it.

So what's the issue.

I like that they're annoying.

It gives us something to talk about seriously, Like it's like it's not that big of a deal.

Really, yeah, you know, it's not harmful.

It's not harmful.

No, And I feel like that's the other thing too.

It's kind of like when who talks for a sandwich?

Yeah, yeah, exactly.

But I think there is something to be said about the energy sucking, which is like I'm sorry, but like, yeah, if I'm going to be hanging out, I'm trying to have a good time.

And I know so and so is inviting so and so who all she does is talk about her issues with her boyfriend all day, no matter what she circles it back to that, I'm going to be like I don't want that person to come because we've already had her come seventeen times and everybody, I think.

But to see her side a little bit not in sorry op, And I appreciate the submission, but it does kind of sound like, oh, pe doesn't have a problem, and I think, no, p doesn't.

That is where I am getting a little bit Well, that's like, that's a little bit dicey, because like it seems like, okay, because like if if one of my friends is like another friend because they find them annoying, but I don't I'm not gonna not invite them by proxy.

I'm like, yeah, sorry, so would they be excluding Annabelle is not gonna yeah exactly.

I kind of feel like her charges were kind of legit.

Yeah.

I feel like it's like I think it's like somewhere down the middle.

To be honest, I feel like there's just like there's this is like a communication issue at the end of the day.

Yeah, it feels like I can see because she did, I mean, she did tell her you know.

See.

Those are my big questions were like Okay, does she know and like do they.

Still have like you know, but also instead of being like, actually, my friends don't my new friends don't like you.

She could have been like, hey, sometimes they like said why like sometimes if they feel exhausted by Yeah, but you guys all the time like give her a chance to adjust her behavior.

So that's literally someone that they like.

Yes, you know you could report.

Yeah, but they might be sensitive and defensive.

I mean you never really know.

It's tough unless you guys are all eighteen.

I feel I feel caught.

I mean there's there's politics here.

It's a vibe killer.

I think we all have a vibe killer friend.

Not necessarily harmful, they're just kind of a vibe killer.

They're just kind of like they could really shift the energy of an otherwise like kind of immaculate vibes.

It's not that they're bad, it's just they just kind of kill it.

Yeah, and that's tough.

Yeah, I can't really ding at for having a new friend group.

I feel like you could have been more forthcoming early on.

Maybe there's like a little bit of like right, they weren't honest.

They could have just said like, look, Amy, I'm not inviting you to stuff with my group because this is what they said.

But it is like a soft I don't think you have.

I don't think you're an asshole for having a new friend group, but I think you might be a soft white TA yes merging.

No, I'm not there.

After she tried to cancel my sweet Op submitted to my podcast, I can't, I'm saying NTA and she is after horrible friend, untrustworthy, ruined her life.

No, all Op did was was he wasn't or she wasn't very forthcoming.

And I feel like she wasn't forthcoming.

Why why?

Because we all know Amy has self centered tendencies.

All she talks about is boys.

She's turned off all these new people.

And I have a feeling that if Op was like, hey, like they mentioned that, like what you said, they mentioned that all you talk about is boys?

Oh well they're fucking bitches.

Yeah, it would have been something.

Yeah, it wouldn't have been, but at least would have said it.

Yeah yeah, but she wouldn't have been like, you know, you're right.

Sometimes I guess I do kind of get a little bit focused on my stuff.

Now.

She was like, have that moment a TA for having a new friend group?

So where are we?

And I'm saying, NTA, didn't you guys with yeah, oh I can get with NTA.

I love it, maybe like a soft like maybe just sh Yeah, you.

Guys are throwing soft stage in there.

Okay, guys, these reviews graduating my patre on patreon dot com, slash it a pod F two hundred two and fifty plus bonus episodes, Well come on, it's.

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Here we go.

Our second story.

A I a boyfriend, peede the bed and is mad at me?

Why boyfriend?

And twenty seven and I f twenty three just moved into a new house and bought a new mattress.

Wow, last night I woke up to a wet feeling under my arm and hand.

My boyfriend was already up and in the bathroom.

When he came back.

I asked him if he spilled something or if he knew why it was wet.

He told me he thinks he peed the bed.

I asked him again and said, wait, are you serious?

And he said, I think I peed in my dream and Pete in real life.

We are both half away at this point, and I'm just surprised he actually did wet the bed.

I asked him to go grab stuff to clean it, and he told me it was fine.

I asked him what he meant by that, and he grabbed a towel, laid it on the wet spot, and got back into bed to go to sleep.

I pulled the covers off and told him that he needs to go grab stuff to clean it because I don't want it to get stayed in and it's a new mattress and we don't have a mattress cover yet.

He told me it was fine.

I'm overreacting.

That pissed me off, and I told him I'm not going to sleep in his piss and that's not fair to me.

He told me clean it in the morning, that it's not a big deal and doesn't warrant the reaction I have.

That was not the solution I wanted, so I took all the sheets off the bed and threw them at him and told him to sleep on the couch.

It was very irritating hearing him telling me that I'm overreacting because I asked him to clean up his peet the bed we both slept in.

He then knocked on the door ten minutes later asking for a new blanket because the one I gave him smelled like pe a.

I da, hello, well that's hilarious, so fucking funny.

Wow, damn wait, I forget how long have they been together?

Did they say they just moved a new house.

That's all we know about a new mattress.

You made your pea bed and now you got I will at least a year.

I will say, yeah, I will say I think I've peed the bed maybe once, but I definitely used to feed the bed a lot more when I drank.

It's kind of a drinking thing.

I was gonna say I've definitely peed the bed in my sleep when I was drunk that night, and it was at my parents house when I was probably like in my early twenties.

I literally, in my sleep was swimming underwater, like in the ocean, and I started to pee, and then I woke up mid pee and I was like, oh, oh my god.

I was so embarrassed.

But yeah, the what I did was immediately clean it.

Like I was awake for an hour trying to soak it up, trying to like get I got like we had pets at the time.

I got like the pet just to get I mean no, like yeah, yeah, I was like, I'm not gonna leave it here, like sleeping in your own.

Pissed I mean sleeping in your own pisses.

You're right, it's you're right.

But here's the thing you're sharing the best you make someone else sleep in your piss No, No, that's crazy.

You can't beyond them.

Also not, I can't relate because I have not peed in the bed as an adult yet.

You think you're better than us, Yes, but it's probably because I don't drink.

But like so, I've neus it's definitely I don't feel like a drunk like it definitely happens a lot drunk.

I'm a vivid dreamer and I've come close to doing it again.

But I fear now.

I have a fear now where I have to go to the bathroom every time I go to bed.

Even if I go to bed and I'm awake for now, I'm getting up and going to the bathroom.

You know what that actually is my my problem now?

This is this is maybe t m I, but if I drink too much water, I'll wake up not from peeing myself but from a piss hard on.

Maybe you guys have heard about this.

It's a piss hard when you get hard, but it's just a lot.

So it is hard to be because it's so hard.

Yeah, angle, yeah, like a crazy.

My husband gets that.

I'm like, why do you have like a heart, but it's not a genuine heart on too, it's very insincere.

Yeah yeah, well that's that's a weird.

I'm I don't understand medically how that works is obviously it's not.

Your dick doesn't fill with piss.

Oh my god, my nephew should be.

This song that I hate, it's called Accidental Boner's heard of it.

It's on YouTube.

Apparently millennials made it.

That sounds terrible.

It's like group.

I just feel like you pee on someone, you ship on someone, you vomit on something.

I'm like, yeah, you gotta really spring to do it right.

But here's the thing.

If it was vomit or ship he I don't think he would have slept in it, right, because that's no.

I'm just saying, if you vomit on someone's couch, I don't care if you're sick, it's like you gotta say sorry and start cleaning.

Yeah, oh my god, I totally so what makes piss acceptable?

There is no except shit.

I feel like this is reminding me of a different story that maybe I'll tell you is later.

But basically, my dad dated this woman and she took a shit on the floor.

Oh a flavor flav vibe.

Yeah, that was crazy for love and then.

Also pissed the guest bed because she's so dry.

But it just made me laugh because immediately after my dad just broke up with her.

But it is like you, it was like absolutely not like no way, it sucks because she was cool, actually liked her.

Besides, it's too bad that she had a fucking shit on the floor.

I feel like now.

Then then they get sent off, she goes go sleep on the couch, and then he comes back and wakes her up again.

It says this like this, like this little selfish piece of shiite.

I feel like crazy, this guy's a little sack of shit.

I wonder if they still live together.

I wonder what world does she like?

I mean, like, I know we're not supposed to like what world is she an asshole?

Like?

It's so interesting because in a world where like in my I'm thirty five and single and I'm like whoa.

The weirdest part about thinking about a relationship these days is not like right, when you've been with Marcus for like ten years, right, you know each other.

But even after ten years, knew shit keeps happening like this, And my fear as a single person is like, oh, if I marry someone that's saying three years, I don't know them at all, really and this shit.

Pissing on you, you know?

So for me, I'm like, how did you get this far in a relationship and you don't know that, like there was never another situation that warranted the same kind of behavior, you know, or is this like a totally new situation.

For I actually fail your fear a little bit because I just I now I what's it called.

H It's called bruxism when you grind your teeth at night.

And I'm really mad on my body because I got surgery so I could breathe through my nose, so now that I'm not breathing through my mouth, drop my brain is kind of like a nose job.

My brain's like I thought you would always denounce when people said that, because.

It was I just did announce.

I'm gonna say, you have a really nice nose, except thank you.

That's called ryde and plasty.

I had accept a blasty and I was like, seriously bright.

So my brain's like, oh cool, the mouth is free.

Now grind his teeth.

I'm like, bro, what the fuck are we doing?

Wait, so your nose isn't natural, it is bossy.

You really do have such a cuy who knows?

Thank you, Danny.

I don't know.

I don't know if it is natural.

It was blocked.

It was blocked on the inside.

I'm glad that your cute nose can breathe.

Thank you so much.

But yeah, it's like, it is crazy to be thirty five and be like cool, random new health problem.

I got to pay for a mouthguard.

Yeah, and I have to.

It's called night guard.

To pay six fifty, I.

Should proably get one because I'm starty to get this thing where like your bones I forgot what it's called, but it's called exoskeletal something like my bones are protruding out with the side of my gums today, but it's from grinding.

Oh so you're a grinder too.

Yeah, I wear a retainer from my visial line.

It's just like now I use mouth tape.

Mouth tape.

It's helped a lot.

I'm not gonna lie.

Also, getting tired now freaks me out.

I'm like, why am I tired?

I'm still young?

What is that?

And I'm like, you're thirty five.

Bitch, Like you know, honestly, I've been the sun for fifteen minutes and I'm wiped.

Oh yeah, it takes me out of it.

I will say the mouthguard, though, might be a good way to get I was talking to someone the other day who was it yesterday?

They were like, oh Anna, She was like, I told myself I was gonna start chewing more gum because I'm a big believer that chewing gum slims here.

Yeah I heard.

You're like, the the mouth part is.

Similar because your mouth will be stronger.

Your job will be your jaw will be stronger, because I already know, like on these videos, I'm like, I'm chinting so hard.

I already feeling chitting so hard.

A I t a boyfriend Peter the bed and is mad at me for my response.

I'm just like, you can't be on someone and act like this.

I can't even give you a half asleep pass.

It's like you need to wake up, bro, And he was sober.

You just got a new mattress that you know, she didn't mention it.

Also just his attitude after, Like, I mean, I would have empathy, like like if my husband pissed the bed, like I'd have empathy firm because I'd be like, well, what's going on?

But he would feel bad.

Well that's what I'm saying.

She's not even overreacting.

She was like, we just have to clean this, and he's like, yeah, sleep, you don't really love me.

He's given buttermilk.

Bitch talk to send in comment.

Why did people date these absolute creatures?

If my man did that, he'd have the washer running in two minutes with backup sheets.

Literally, Why do people date disgusting gremlins?

Well, this person doesn't even sound like not op Op's husband doesn't even sound like he knows where the sheets are.

I know he's a piglet antia boyfriend.

Pete the bed's mad at me.

I think we all agree it's a no brainer.

It's nta and he is the piss base.

I was going to say that my friend in college had a boyfriend who always pissed the bed dude, and she would just.

Put up with it.

It happened like three different times.

Oh no, it's pist He was always drunk.

He was literally always drunk, and she'd be like, come on come.

I was like, oh god, your bed probably seels terrible.

Okay, folks, please rate, subscribe, Join me ont dot com slash t a pot or wrapping up Actually on a slightly heavier note.

Maybe I should have rearranged these, but it is what it is.

A I t a for not telling my parents I got my tubes tied.

I twenty seven F gave birth to my fourth kid last month via C section, and I got my two tibes.

I got my tubes tied during it, which my husband, twenty seven M was in support of, so we reached earlier.

Yesterday, when my dad and stepmom came around to meet the baby, the birth comes up and I mentioned that I got my tube side so that me and my husband won't have to worry about any more kids coming along.

My parents are shocked, talking about how it's disgraceful.

Then I didn't tell them sooner.

What if my husband wants more kids?

My goodness.

I tried to explain that neither of us wanted more, but my parents wouldn't hear it and left early.

I didn't think it would be a big deal.

That I got them tied and that it wouldn't matter.

But aiita what Wow?

When I first read this, I did not catch that they had their fourth kids.

No, yeah, they already got kids.

Twenty girl locked that up.

Twenty seven.

Oh I thought the husband was twenty seven.

I'm like, free your pussy, Like, yeah, they're both twenty seven.

You don't need any more kids, you have four, You have more than enough.

I'm like, what are the wrong these parents are giving?

Like elon musk energy, psychotic or like just like super catholic, like you like, who is four too little for?

But also in general, even if you had one or zero?

Yeah, no, see that, Well let's go there, because that's what I thought this was.

Let's actually make this to me.

I can understand if they had zero to just spring it on your parents to say I just got my tubes tied right casually, It's like, well they're gonna that's gonna impact them.

Most parents want to be grandparents, and because that's the nature of life, we want to keep our little genes running.

That's why they got us here.

Nobody thinks the genes, but they did get us here.

They got us this far.

I'm so sorry.

To get pregnant.

I do think it's reasonable for parents to have an emotion, and I think it's a heavy thing to say I got my tubs out.

I don't think you need permission.

It's your fucking body.

But I don't think it's reasonable to be like, oh, well they were mad.

I'm like, well, yeah, they're allowed to be mad.

It's it could it could be maddening.

I could say that it's a very big deal.

I mean, like not in the sense of the surgery, I guess, but I'm assuming that maybe while she was having her sea section they.

Did it or something like that.

They threw it there.

It's like getting an oil change, you know, there's all those add ons that's like section, let me.

Charge you for it.

Let me just charge you like crazy.

But yeah, I mean it's hard for me because I'm really close with my parents, so like they would have known about that months before.

I would have been like, you know, if it happened in the moment, like if it did happen the season.

I don't know if that's how it works, but like during the sea section or right before, they're like, okay, by the way, while we're in there, if you want to get your tube side.

We can do that, you know.

And it was like an impulse decision maybe and then telling them.

But sounds like her husband talks you know.

Yeah, I think it feels interesting for me, as someone who's close to my parents to just spring that on them versus like being like, hey, this is what I'm gonna do, you know, just so you know what to expect.

I think you can tell them after the fact.

I just think like they're not doing something wrong by having a negative reaction.

If it's zero or one kids, maybe even two, you could argue, but four already have four, that's a lot.

That's doubling.

Yeah, if everybody had two kids, that's two kids per person in the couple's Yeah, that's that's too many kids.

That's a lot of kids.

But also like I mean, I feel like we all we all agree with like our eventual verdict here.

But I will say that it is crazy that these people are so upset about well, what about what about your husband?

What he wants more kids?

It's like like, yeah, pregnant, Like I'm like, so I'm thinking about having kids like in the next two years, and like I've recently like acquired this new fear of like being pregnant, not of having the child itself, even though it's a lot of responsibility comes with its own stuff.

Like I'm thinking about being pregnant.

Crazy, Yeah, especially for.

Me because I'm like a hypochondriac.

That's going to be crazy.

It's crazy.

That's going to be so scary.

Yeah, And I'm also like a postpartum dula, so I know too much about there and what could be possible and what can go wrong and just like all these things and it's just like it really like it fucks your body sometimes.

Did you know that you can become pregnant and then become allergic to things you've never been allergic to your whole life.

That's horrible.

Like your hormones can get so fucked up.

You can never like go like go back to any weight that you were originally at.

You can, like no matter how.

Much you work out or what you want, if you lose avocados.

My sister became allergic to mushrooms and chicken after she had her last.

That's the most randomness and she could never eat it again.

But yeah, that feels like a chicken cast a weird spell.

I have no idea, but sometimes it can happen.

And then you know what's funny is sometimes when you are pregnant, if you're dairy free, you can do dairy.

Oh.

So like some good things can happen to the babies in there, Like I am so fucking bloated.

I don't know what you're eating, but it's bloating.

And you're like, I feel fine, this is great.

I've been drinking home milk.

No.

But it's crazy babies.

With that being said, it's just so crazy for these people to just like not even consider like all the trauma her body's been through with these four fucking kids.

Yeah, my friend, I just.

Want to tie my tie my tubes and like just have raw dog it in peace.

Baby.

My friend Joanna, she's done the pop before she had baby, and the whole time she was telling me all about morning sickness and just how horrible it is.

And I was like, Joanna, I feel like you're having a really rough pregnancy, and she's like, this couldn't be more normal.

Yeah, and Larry complain, like complain but in a funny way.

You know, she's she's comediance.

She's very funny about it.

And then, uh, anyway, so she has her baby.

I visited her.

She lives on the West Side.

I know, can you imagine I went that far and she goes every time I see my baby, it's like Christmas.

Oh.

And I was like, would you have another one?

She's like, yeah, probably.

I was like, damn when guys bojex dreaming?

Yeah, oh was he asleep?

We gotta we gotta get it.

We gotta listen to this dog dreaming.

Yeah, listen, that is so cute.

I like one to tause he's like running about, he's barking something.

Yeah, male person, Oh yeah.

What are you dreaming about?

Bo Jack?

That's freaking adorable, little pupper.

He's a good boy.

Oh he's a way he did.

He's like, I'm alive.

Yeah.

So top commat Your sex life and reproductive life is no one's business, let alone your parents' business absolutely descends in comment.

Why did you even tell them when you do it?

It's none of their business.

I mean, I'm like, because I feel like that's a normal thing to say your parents, I'm not going to hide that.

Yeah.

Unfortunately, sometimes you have to hide shit like that from your friends.

And they're crazy.

I mean, look, if you knew your parents were going to react like that.

I would hide it from them, girl.

I told I told my religious sister that I was thinking about doing IVF because me and my husband are both character carrier statistic fibrosis and it'd be the smart thing to do.

And her fucking weird religious Catholic ass was like making it about her and going like, so.

What are you gonna do with the extra embryos.

You're just gonna kill them.

You're just gonna kill them.

I'm like, yeah, like I guess so I'm not gonna have like because I have like lots of eggs.

So it's like, what would I have like eight eggs.

I'm not eat them.

I'm gonna pick the two that little human eggs.

Yeah, I had it here.

I've only had a C section with the last one.

Also, I realized the wording was off.

I didn't actually say do it to my parents, it was just kind of inferred in the conversation.

So I removed that part.

I wasn't discussing my bedroom life with my parents.

Yeah, I don't really like pretty you have four kids.

People make this mistake of it inferred versus implied and drives me nuts.

What's the difference.

Implied means it was conveyed by what was said.

Inferred means you interpreted it.

Ah, yeah, okay, good.

I honestly, my dumb ass was like, it's kind of the same thing.

No, I mean it is related a TA for not telling my parents when I got my tubs tied.

I think these parents need to calm down.

Yeah.

Yeah, she had four kids, y'all?

Are your generation is going on?

And also you are so lucky compared to all the people who are having zero.

Yeah, four kids is enough?

Four You got four when the when the when the blight begins to take over the crops, you're gonna lose two to the asthma that will play plague most of us.

But you still got two left.

So fucking funny.

You know they got backups.

I hate that, that's so funny.

But yeah.

Also, she's twenty seven.

She's twenty seven.

When she's young, she's a baby.

Be done with those kids, girl, be done.

Dang, she ripped them out.

Yeah, she's done.

That's kind of nice.

I actually had a friend who had a baby during college and now his kid.

I think his kid is like triggeringly old.

I think it's like fifteen.

And I was like that's not right.

He's like that's right, bro, And I'm like that's.

Crazy, because that's crazy.

He passes for the people who don't have kids too.

I see someone and they have like a three year old.

All of a sudden, I'm like, oh my god, time flies.

They're not for us.

Then that goes on Instagram like it's the little things glad you get so big.

Thanks for joining me, thanks for joining us.

We'll see you guys next time.

A