Welcome to the Shabby Detective, yet another Colombo podcast.

I'm your host Mike White.

Joining me, of course is mister Chris Tashu, So.

I'm gonna beat you to it.

Diplomatic immunity.

Oh nice, That's all I can think of this whole episode.

I was like, when is that coming into play?

When is the South African from Lethal Weapon two coming into this?

When is the diplomatic community?

He raised its ugly ahead, because if that's the title of the episode, I know it's got to play into this somehow.

Yes, it is a case of immunity.

This is the second episode of the fifth season, directed by Ted post Too.

Is one of the most solid directors that you could ever ask for, written by Lou Shaw from a story by James Menzies, and it stars Hector Elizondo as Hassan Sala and Salmonio as Rochman, Habib and man oh Man.

This whole episode, you get a lot of people that are playing Arabic people that are Italian, Latino pretty much most ethnicities other than actual Arabic people.

Speaking of the exorcist in Salmonio, you look like Salmonio.

Oh, I didn't know there was a line in there.

Yeah, that's a line in the movie when the detective says it to keris you look like Salmonio.

This is sal Minio, just four months before he gets murdered.

And then do you remember that Murder by the Book episode from the first season that lady who gets the goods on Jack Cassidy, she gets murdered the same year as well.

Fuck, that's real life.

This is Colombo, and this is a story of the legation of Swarri and Arab nation somewhere in the Middle East.

And yes we are right here in big time Opek territory.

The gas crisis will be starting pretty darn soon, I believe, if it hasn't already.

So yeah, the Arab people are not really portrayed that well.

But I have to say it could be worse.

I've seen worse interpretations true lies, but this one isn't nearly as bad.

This is not nearly as bad as true lies.

I might as well just be like eating babies in that movie.

I mean, Hector Alesondo.

Just say that name a couple of times.

Then the name of the actor is Hector Alexando.

And the character's name in this episode is Hassan Salah.

Hector Arizondo is looking so good in this episode.

Yeah, not looking remotely Middle Eastern.

No matter what color headscarf you put on the man, he will not be Middle Eastern.

Guys.

I know that this might be hard to believe, but I don't believe for a second that he's a Middle Eastern man.

I believe that's Hector Alexando in a headscarf.

Anthony Quinn.

He can definitely play a lot of different ethnicities and be.

Believable looks exotic, Yes.

Yes, Hector Alexondo just always seems like the nicest guy in the world, even when he's playing a villain, even when he was in the taking of Pellam one two three and just being a total piece of shit.

I was just like, I want to hang out with that guy.

I want to hang out with Hector Alexondo.

I like Hector Arizondo in this episode.

What an episode from a time and a place that doesn't exist anymore, That's all I'll say.

Yeah, I'm trying to remember, so it was when was the Irenian Revolution?

When was the shawd posed?

Because it feels like it's talking a lot to that, especially with the King character.

And wow, what a strange actor, that is, to look at his filmography and just be like, this guy was.

In it looks like an adult child.

Yes, Yes, Barry Robins who apparently tried out for the Monkeys at one point and really only was in a few things, and then he got a really virulent case of cancer, I believe, and died when he was forty one years old in nineteen eighty six.

Yeah.

Really only known for me for this and Bless the Beasts and Children.

The Billy Moomy movie.

Yeah, that's a good movie.

A child gets murdered.

Yeah, yeah, Hi, I enjoy some child death now in the game.

Yeah, I mean too.

I got no problem with kids dying on screen.

You'll notice I said kids dying on screen.

He freaks curious.

Chris, what did you think of this episode?

Overall?

Not was standing the very questionable racial politics of.

It, the questionable casting choices.

It's not very good.

Really, I think it's fine.

I just I feel like the entire third act and the how catch him part undercuts the entire episode because I was just like, this is how we're solving this.

We could have done this in the first five minutes, is what it feels like.

I don't know.

This is one of those ones where Columbo shows up and I'm like, oh, he knows that this guy's in on it from the second he sees him.

When the guy got hit on the back of the head.

How did that happen?

I was like, this is two minutes into this thing, Columbo.

Shit, man, this is an hour and a half long episode.

Columbo shows up very early in the episode, which I do appreciate, shows up in the first ten fifteen minutes.

Yeah, but I just found the how ketch him at the center of this to not be particularly engaging for me.

That's just me.

And then once you get to the end of the episode and we see the moment where Columbo catches him and it's labor in the other room listening the whole time.

It's like hour and a half for this.

Really, it's one of those episodes where like, there were so many other off ramps and I felt like they could have taken a more interesting one, and this is the one they ended up taking.

That's fine.

I feel like it's one of those episodes where they've had all these other opportunities and they don't take them, just to subvert the audience.

Up until the last moment, which is fine, but the way the episode ends, I was like, really, he's just okay, fine, sure, But I don't know, is are you surprised that I'm not super hot on this episode?

Not surprised.

I can see where you're coming from with this, because it does drag a little bit in the middle.

It's not the most action packed.

And to your point, I do the way that Colombo shows up, and I'd like that he's actually on this case quote unquote by mistake as well.

Yeah, and just I like the reaction actions from the other policemen that are in this room, and that he inadvertently becomes witnessed to the alibi, which we don't normally get that, so I thought that was pretty nice.

And then yeah, like, very quickly once he arrives at the scene of the crime, he is on that dust like nobody's business, and this whole thing of the plaster dust, and that not underneath the body of the dead guy, it's on the papers that were burned allegedly after the explosion happened.

I do like how he's putting all of these pieces together very quickly.

Oh yeah, it is basically like I know everything right now, but now it's for the next hour.

I'm going to pretty much make you trap yourself, make you come out with some of these other things that I want to know more about, or I just want you to know that I know what's happening here, and especially this is yet another one.

We haven't had this for a little bit.

I mentioned Murder by the Book, which is a double murder where we've got the guy who they're like, Okay, we need to take care of this woman who is going to threaten us with the threatened me of Jack Cassidy, with the truth of this stuff.

I like this how he's I don't think he ever really was.

I think he was always planning on killing sal Minio and trying to pin the whole thing on him.

And I love how quickly Colombo just gets rid of that.

He's just like, oh, yeah, no, he was wearing glasses and contacts at the same time.

I'm just amazed that the glasses stayed on him after his car rolled down that mountain.

Right, Jesus, I have a very serious question for you, Chris.

What did you think of Jeff Goldblum in this episode?

Oh my god, isn't it like the star of the whole show.

Is he I love it, love that is just one of the protesters.

Look, I always love seeing a young Jeff Goldbloom And this is what seventy five, So.

Yeah, lord, this is one of his earliest roles.

Man.

Yeah, boy, isn't it.

This is pre death wish then, yeah, I think so, yeah, because I always think about him early on in his career in Annie Hall.

Where is it any hall where he says I lost my mantra?

Right, that's Hall.

Yeah, And that's also relatively early on.

That's what seventies as well.

Look, yeah, Star Wars came out.

Yeah, Jeff Goldlum's great.

I just it is distracting to see Jeff Goldblum just walking around.

It's just there's just Jeff Goldblum, like all right, there he is, but there he goes again like a right.

And it's so funny to me that he's not even the guy who Colombo ends up interviewing that.

It's another young radical And I'm like, okay, like that guy probably thought that he's going to be the big star in a few years, and instead it's this other, this dorky guy over here that doesn't even have a line.

He's the one who we're still talking about today.

Just walking in circles, right.

I do love that scene though, where they're just like walking in circles trying to talk to him.

So I do like that.

I'm the fuzz, I will say, as much as I'm not maybe a fan of some of the stuff exterior to Colombo in this episode, I like Colombo in this episode a fair amount.

Yeah, I do.

I really like him in this And yeah, I feel like he's doing some of the most Colombo stuff that we've seen for a little while, especially when he shows up at the one party and they're like, we're not sure if your breast quite right and he unbuttons his coat and he's wearing a tuxedo and he talks about how what was it is?

Brother in law is a waiter?

Yeah, and then he tells the one woman out by the table, oh yeah, I got new shoes sixteen ninety five.

I just it's it's one of those scenes where if they showed it in the credits, it'd be like, what are we watching?

The Max Gail Kung Fu thing where he's take off your jacket, he's just like wearing a suit underneath, Like what reasoning did we need for this, all right, this makes more of sense.

Yeah, you're properly attired, is what they say.

Well, and then I guess he forgot that he used to like eating Stales because he was eating him like crazy in that chess match episode.

Yeah, sure was, But now he's that little Yeah, I'm not sure.

He's definitely into that beef that is being prepared for the king, though.

I just like Peter Fulk in a suit.

He looks so dapper.

He's such a dapper looking man in that suit.

It doesn't look as shabby as normal in this episode, at least not for part of it.

It does feel like though it spends an hour kind of spinning its wheels, though unfortunately we've seen episodes like this before.

I tend to be more interested in the episodes where it's not imminently obvious how things are going to play out, and this one, I don't know the way it concludes.

I was just surprised.

You can't get me, You got me, you can't do anything about it, Come on show.

I don't know that whole.

Thing, tase of immunity, Like, when's it going to come into play?

I'm just waiting at this point.

Maybe that's a fault of mine.

Maybe it's a fault of mine because the title I expected it to go to the diplomatic community thing.

Yeah, I like that they save that for the end.

Can't do anything to you, You might as well confess because you beat me.

It's like one of the few times where Colombo will tell the criminal, you know, you beat me, there's nothing I can do, and just lets the criminal just gloat so much.

Yeah, and then when the king comes in and it's just you come back with me and we'll get you some some homegrowing justice and just oh.

We're gonna cut my hands off exactly like that.

Yeah, the aspect of them is that racist?

I don't know, because we do know that punishments were definitely very different over there, and they I remember the one kid who did some graffiti and where was that?

Was it Thailand or where he ended up getting caned in the public square kind of thing, like he deserved it.

Yeah, I've been caned.

I could take it, but it cost me two hundred dollars.

I was like, how much did you have to pay?

Bike?

Yeah, in Thailand, of all places, if you're just spray painted something with graffiti, wouldn't have had to pay anything.

I know they wouldn't guarantee me a lady boy punisher.

So oh yeah, lady boy punisher.

I think Tucker Carlson was talking about that on his show the other night.

I think he had to punisher into a woman.

Bringing Eminem and Punisher Garbs.

Lady boy punisher.

That's also the name of my autobiography.

By the way, boy lady, now that we've said enough times, it sounds like a serial killer, like the lady boy punisher, Like.

Yeah, no, I don't want to punish the lady boys.

I want the lady boy to punish me.

Oh okay, it's like a Harvey, don't punish the boy, punish me type thing.

Yeah, kinky right, lady boyish, good lord.

I love the set decoration in this where they just went to the five Diamond picked up anything that they looked unusual.

They have a hundred hookahs.

It's like wherever you look, oh there's another hookah, oh.

One at a time.

I just enjoy the back and forth between Alexando and Falks so much, and it just feels again that they're having a good time and Alexander can play it straight.

He can be that straight man for the Lieutenant very well.

Yeah, I agree.

I think my issue with this episode more just stems from the way it concludes more than anything else.

But again, that's the final moment, that's the episode going out the door.

That's what they want you to remember about the episode when you walk away from it.

I can't help but think about that.

But at the same time, to your point, Hector al is Ondo and Peter Falk are pretty great.

Yeah, and that's the majority of this episode I think, is those two going at it, and then the whole repeating gag of the robes thing, which I'm like, Okay, that's interesting, And again I don't feel like they're making fun of him being in the robes.

I think it's more making fun of Colombo for continuously stepping out his hem.

Glumb was not fit to touch the hem of his garment.

I think the weirdest thing in this episode for me is the King character who's played by a literal child is what it looks like.

Yeah, what an interesting choice that actor is.

He reminded me of the little Prince character from Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom.

Like the Maharaja.

Yeah, oh, the Maharaja is not married.

Ooh, it turns out it's like a child, right kick Capsules disappointed?

Yeah, oh kill him.

I'm like, whoa, what are you doing this?

I don't know.

It's very interesting that character is.

It's about seventy five, right, Yeah.

I think it's this whole thing of he probably got the throne when he was very young, right, and now he's very like, let's reform all this stuff, which is interesting to me that he's the reformer character and wants to change all of this stuff.

And then Alexandro's this reactionary was just like, no, we're gonna make the serami great again.

This will be fantastic.

I'm going to lower the price of eggs.

Everything's going to be great day one boom.

But yeah, the king doesn't want that.

The King actually wants to make some good reforms and everything.

Wouldn't you like to be in their kitchen though?

Eating all that food?

Oh my god, I could almost smell that food through the TV, and I was just I don't know how it is around you, Chris, but Middle Eastern restaurants are so plentiful around here.

I always joke with my friends back home that are Pakistani or Indian that I must have been Southeast Asian or Middle Eastern in a previous life, because dates and pistachios and all that stuff is just give me that nothing else.

I want nothing else but that, So I do a lot of my way to find it.

But it is here.

I was so confused when I went to Montreal a few years ago and I kept seeing this weird shape everywhere, and I finally realized that it was basically like the shwarma kind of thing, but it was like a neon version of that.

I was like, oh, that's telling me that this is a Middle Eastern restaurant.

But then they also called everything a Lebanese restaurant.

I'm like, oh, okay for me.

I don't know why, but here in Michigan we call them Middle Eastern restaurants.

Because a lot of the folks are just from They all make similar cuisine.

Oh yeah, everybody is taking and putting their name on it, like our Lebanese friends.

Isn't that right?

Richard Hadham, he doesn't listen to this show.

He's kind of.

Shows all right.

The Kibbi King doesn't listen to our stuff.

The kibby k yea king Kibby.

I mean, you know, that there are more Middle Eastern people that live in Detroit than anyplace else in the world other than the Middle East.

I do know that, dear born right Roic, because it used to be Henry Ford's hometown and he was one of the most racist motherfuckers ever.

It's a real pleasant guy from the sound of it.

Oh yeah, Middle Eastern people.

Yeah, huge fan of people that didn't look like him.

I guess the Middle Easterns and him would get along since they don't like Jewish people.

But that's true.

Yeah, how do you think Hector Alzando feels about the Jewish people?

They never asked him in this episode.

No, they didn't.

They went away from a lot of the politics.

Make a fake country.

That's why Saria or whatever the fuck Suarow or Swaria and then Sealmnio.

I think he's actually Sicilian.

He is Sicilian?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, Sicilians are darker Italians.

Oh yeah, I remember true romance.

So.

I'm not going to say it.

But that's not inaccurate.

That's a true statement that comes from a place of real things that people have said.

That's not me making that.

Oh no, I will tell you a story that I was going to save for this episode, which was that I was working at Blockbuster in ann Arbor when I was in college, and I remember this guy coming up to the counter and I looked up and I was taken aback, and I was just like, oh my god, this guy looks exactly like Hector Alisondo.

I was like, what the hell's going on here?

Now?

This is years before I worked at the Blockbuster that Tom Arnold used to frequent whenever I wasn't there, like he yeah, literally because he was dating a girl from Lincoln Park, and yeah, he there was a Lincoln Park Blockbuster, but apparently what they wanted was there in the south Gate one or wind Out one where I was working, So they came on down and had to open up a membership and all that stuff.

And I was looking at Tom Arnold's rental history, but yeah, this guy, I was just like, oh my god, you look exactly the actor Aleszonda.

I didn't say that out loud though, until I look at his ID for pulling up his account something and I don't remember what Elizondo, and I was like, are you related to Hector Alexondo.

He's, oh, yeah, that's my cousin.

I was like, what oh wow, look okay, because you look a lot like him.

Yeah, I get that a lot.

Okay, because this was right around the time of Like a Pretty Woman and some of those other films.

It's just like people knew who Hector Alixondo was, but I hope everybody still does.

He was in The Princess.

Reason they're making a third one.

That's good.

They better get him back because he's still to.

Assume they're going to Julie Andrews is going to be in it.

I've written to his people so many times and just still haven't gotten a response whatsoever.

I think he can't be I delight to talk.

To Hector Elizondo.

How could you leave our friend Mike White hanging like that?

I know to him.

He's the one I've never talking to that Mike.

I've heard about him.

Jeff Gold told me he talked to him.

By accident.

I tried to get a role on The White Lotus, and this motherfucker wouldn't em.

Yeah, Mike White, you mean the guy.

Yeah, that's what you should do.

Emails people and be like a Mike White, just don't say which one.

Perhaps you are familiar with my work, and then I like put the wrong IMDb like in there.

Yeah, sure, just and then once you have the interview, you don't have to worry about It's not like he did anything illegal, right, subterfuge, castle intrigue, it's the thing.

I want Hector to be my friend.

Like, clearly, all you got to do is look up in the area where you live, Elezondo, because I think his family must live near you, Mike, Yeah, reach out to Hector Alexando's cousin.

Come on back to the home land.

Yeah here in yeah, in Arbor, Michigan.

It's too funny.

Yeah, I think I'm going to ask you, and I'm sure you're gonna tell me.

Hector Alexondo not on any more episodes of this show.

No, unfortunately he's not.

No, I don't think anybody really from this one.

Maybe some of the cops, but I don't even think so.

Sow Minyo's pretty dead pretty quick.

We're not even seeing like Bruce Kirby or any of these guys, like some of the regular faces that we see, right, people that are at the police station are definitely different than most of the policemen we've seen.

And then when I was looking up like trying to get dirt on this episode and get behind the scenes stuff.

There is nothing.

There's no real discussion of this one, which was unfortunate because for me, I know you're not I'm a huge fan, but for me, I'm just like, this is a solid episode.

I just really like the way that Colombo approaches the mystery.

I just wanted more, But that's a mean.

I completely understand and admit that's a me problem.

That's not the episode's fault.

It is interesting too, though, that the last episode was ninety three minutes.

This one is only seventy and then we'll get another seventy minute or with a matter of honor, but I think the rest of them this season are over seventy, if not ninety minutes.

Yeah, yoh, now you see him as eighty five minutes, which is an odd time, but that's the return of Jack Cassidy, so I'm happy with that one.

Unfortunately, though, we're going to have to sit through identity crisis when we come back next month, where we get the return of Patrick mcgoin both in front of and behind the camera in his Colombo directorial debut, I think, and we get the return of Leslie Nielsen.

Doesn't sound like it's going to be a good episode though.

Maybe you'll love it, but I do not have fond memories of it.

Maybe I'll be like, oh, yeah, no, this makes total sense the way that this was set up.

But yeah, it's an odd one for me.

I'm very curious to get your take on that one.

As long as Patrick McGowin says we'll be seeing you in the episode will be fine, which I get the distinct feeling he might.

I believe there are references to at least Secret Agent, if not the prisoner, but I'm pretty sure there's no prisoner direct references.

I'm looking forward to that, but I'm always looking forward to getting an opportunity to talk with you.

So what else is new?

Yeah, well until we come back next month, Chris, what are you working on these days?

Podcasts?

Movie podcasts over at weirdingwey media dot com podcast More broadly, singularly, the culture Cast is the one I've been doing since twenty fourteen.

So yeah, that's where you can find me and the things that I work on, other than ranking on Bond, which can be found at yours and my patreons, respectively, Projection Booth on Patreon or culture Cast on patreons, So that's where you can go to find our patreons for the ten dollars level are up get access to us talking about James Bond once a month with our friend Richard Adam of Richard Adams Paranormal Bookshelves.

What about you, Mike, what are you up to in these trying and fun times?

Oh yeah, pretty much the same thing.

Just doing the podcast work.

No real other stuff that I'm working on right now, no commentaries or anything, just concentrating on the podcast and making the world a little bit safer.

For that, I want to thank John Walker for our opening theme and Colin Gallagher for our closing theme, and I want to thank everybody for listening to this.

I feel like these episodes have been a little short lately, but haven't had a whole lot of behind the scenes stuff that we can share, or interviews or anything.

Hector, Baby, come on, give me a call.

Well, Hector, what are you doing.

We'll set it up.

It'll be great.

We'll talk about diplomacy.

Set it up, Hector.

The three of us will talk about Princess Diaries three and Colombo.

Tic add to the present,