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Welcome to The Useless Hotline hosted by Max Balegde and George Clarke. A place to send your queries and dilemmas no matter how big, small, weird, or embarrassing. We can’t guarantee good advice or that you will leave a changed person, but we can guarantee that this is a useless hotline.

Subscribe and join us every Sunday as we tackle your problems head on and on occasion will be helped by some faces you may recognise on a trial shift.

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00:00 - Intro: Our tour journey and what to expect from this episode

00:20 - Hilarious tour start and Belfast dressing room chaos

02:18 - Tour highlights and strange fan encounters

04:10 - Strictly dance wins and the chaos around voting

05:50 - Funny school stories and learning disabilities on tour

07:45 - The drunken Irish night out and mishaps

12:05 - The epic night out in Newcastle gone wrong

14:10 - Stage antics and the drunken club appearance stories

18:20 - Audience antics, fan stories, and backstage surprises

22:18 - The mysterious "Chopped Cow" fanfic and ridiculous fan interactions

26:37 - Audience behavior, crowd engagement, and wildest moments

30:45 - General tour reflections, upcoming shows, and the travel chaos

35:42 - The differences between social media fans and live audiences

37:14 - Tour wrap-up, gratitude to fans, and future plans

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