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Rachel Hollis gives a tough-love talk on self-deception—how people perform a version of their lives (especially through social media) to feel significant, but end up emptier because they avoid facing what’s real. She breaks down three common lies (performing growth instead of doing it, living in “someday,” and performing for an audience) and offers steps to get honest: a reality-check person, a calendar/bank audit, and saying the true thing out loud.

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00:00 Scarcity Mindset & Why “Faking Abundance” Feels Empty

01:09 Meet Rachel Hollis + Why This Episode Is Tough Love

03:36 The Pattern: Performing Your Life Instead of Living It

06:10 Rachel’s Vertigo Story: When Emotions Show Up in the Body

08:55 You Can’t Fix What You Refuse to Face (Fake It Till You Make It?)

11:13 What Self-Deception Is—and Why Your Brain Does It

14:22 Sawyer, Mirrors, and the Cost of Not Seeing Reality Clearly

19:21 The Quest for Significance: Social Media, Scarcity, and “Looking Successful”

28:10 3 Types of Self-Deception (Type #1: Performing Growth vs. Real Growth)

30:05 When Self-Help Becomes a Trap: Consuming vs. Actually Growing

32:01 ‘Eat Pray Love’ Syndrome: Changing Scenery Without Changing Patterns

33:26 Real Work Isn’t Cute: The Uncomfortable, Unseen Healing Process

35:39 Self-Deception #2: Living in ‘Someday’ Instead of Facing Today

38:35 Self-Deception #3: Performing Your Life for an Audience (Social + AI)

44:07 The Way Through: Ego Deaths, Radical Honesty, and Letting Go of the Facade

46:06 Her Biggest Ego Check: Why ‘Girl, Wash Your Face’ Was Mostly Luck

50:14 3 Practical Steps to Get Real: Accountability, Audits, and Saying It Out Loud

54:37 Closing Reminder: You’re Human—Choose Truth in One Area This Week

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