That Village Everyone Talks About: How to Actually Build Yours | Jessica Hill

August 19

44 mins

Episode Description

Everyone tells new parents it takes a village. Nobody mentions that making mom friends as an adult is genuinely hard and can feel more like dating: is it weird to ask for her number? Do I look like a stalker?

Host Lucy McAfee talks with Jessica Hill, founder and CEO of The Parent Collective, about building your village as a new mom. Jessica spent ten years in England, where prenatal classes grouped expectant parents by neighborhood and due date. She left with a built-in support system and friendships that lasted long after the newborn stage. When she returned to the States, she found playgrounds full of mothers who said they did not find their people until their kids started school. That gap became the reason she created The Parent Collective.

Jessica explains how to build a support system as a new mom when those connections do not happen automatically. Her advice is simple, though not always easy: choose something you genuinely care about, put yourself in places where you will see the same people regularly, and keep showing up when the first few attempts do not lead anywhere. You may not meet a lifelong best friend. Sometimes a "for-now friend" who understands the exact season you are in is enough to make motherhood feel less isolating. And if the newborn stage came and went without your people showing up, it's not too late. Jessica shares practical ways to start building that village right now, wherever you are.

The conversation turns to the Fair Play method, the mental load, and maternal gatekeeping. Jessica shares how a bedtime dance party helped her recognize that her husband needed room to parent in his own way and create separate traditions with their sons. She explains how they divided responsibilities around weekend meals, soccer, and the Saturday "curriculum" he created for their boys. The episode closes with one practical shift for a fairer partnership: when one parent gets protected free time, the other should receive it too, and both should be encouraged to spend that time doing something that restores them.

Press play for practical ways to make mom friends, share the parenting load, and raise boys who understand what it means to show up for the people they love.

Episode Breakdown:

00:00 Meet Jessica Hill, Founder of The Parent Collective

02:26 Ten Years In England And A Built-In Village

09:54 When Your Village Lives Online

11:51 Why Asking For Help Feels Like Weakness

15:51 Inside The Parent Collective's Four Week Class Series

19:59 The Power Of Finding A For Now Friend

22:18 Building Your Village Beyond The Newborn Phase

29:58 The Bedtime Dance Party That Changed the Rules

34:53 Splitting Parenting Roles And Raising Partner-Ready Boys

40:52 The One Small Shift: Free Time That's Actually Fair

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