In this episode, Chris and Alisa Grace explore the powerful and often misunderstood topic of forgiveness—and how it differs from reconciliation. Joined by Dr. Matt Williams, professor of New Testament at Biola University, they unpack the biblical, emotional, relational, and spiritual realities of forgiveness and why unforgiveness can become a significant barrier to healing and freedom.

They discuss common misconceptions about forgiveness, the impact of trauma and abuse, and why forgiving someone does not always mean reconciling with them. Dr. Williams shares stories from years of counseling students, explains how unforgiveness can become a spiritual foothold for the enemy, and offers a clear, Christ-centered definition of true biblical forgiveness. The conversation also explores the physical, emotional, relational, and spiritual consequences of holding onto unforgiveness—and how releasing it leads to peace, restoration, and freedom in Christ.

Whether you’re navigating hurt with a spouse, family member, friend, coworker, or someone from your past, this episode offers practical wisdom and hope-filled guidance to help you move forward without minimizing the pain you’ve experienced.

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Resources Mentioned:

• Finding Freedom in Jesus: The 21 Attributes of Your Identity in Christ – A book by Dr. Matt Williams and Dr. J.P. Foster that explores identity in Christ as a foundation for healing, forgiveness, and spiritual freedom. https://amzn.to/4ra83uF
• Forgiving and Reconciling: – A book by Dr. Everett Worthington that explains the difference between forgiveness and reconciliation and introduces the REACH model of forgiveness. https://amzn.to/4r63ql3
• Boundaries – A practical resource on establishing healthy boundaries, especially important in situations involving abuse, trauma, or unrepentant behavior. https://amzn.to/4ao8Kt3
• Forgiveness Resource - A practical guide outlining steps to seek and grant forgiveness, four signs you’ve truly forgiven, and three common ways to ruin an apology. https://assets.biola.edu/4396738754672012438/attachment/8cac27f799713c64b2e8014a834f283d/250390_-_CMR_-

Connect with Us:

• Website: cmr.biola.edu
• Facebook: facebook.com/biolacmr
• Instagram: instagram.com/biolacmr
• YouTube: www.youtube.com/@biola-cmr

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About the Hosts:

Chris Grace, Ph.D., and Alisa Grace are passionate about helping people build and sustain healthy relationships. As leaders of the Biola University Center for Marriage and Relationships, they combine the wisdom of Scripture with scholarly research to offer practical advice and insights. Learn more about their work at cmr.biola.edu.