AJ rolls in dusty after a big night and immediately delivers one of the loosest sports yarns you’ll ever hear.

Back in 2013 in Dunedin, AJ gets recruited to fire up the Highlanders student section (“The Zoo”) at Forsyth Barr Stadium - but instead of a normal mascot gig, he ends up in a full chicken suit, half cut, and armed with a “bag of gags”… including a black dildo that (somehow) becomes part of the entertainment.

It goes exactly as you’d expect: the sponsor finds out, emails start flying, and AJ cops a life ban… until they change their mind and invite him back with one condition: no dildos.

Then it levels up. Mid-season, a streaker hits the field and AJ - still dressed as a chicken — absolutely crunches him in a tackle that blows up across radio, news, and even lands on ESPN Top 10 plays. But the fame comes with a cost: a news outlet tries to unmask the mascot, forcing AJ into a choice that changes everything.

From there it turns into a three-week Highlanders championship bender: packed pubs, the “Landers Army,” printing champions tees, trophy tours, a cooked Bedford bus with shithouse brakes, cops pulling them over, and a 21-day tear that ends in pneumonia… and a relationship ultimatum he definitely ignores.

This is pure chaos, pure NZ rugby culture, and a proper true yarn from start to finish.

#propertrueyarn

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