Is scheduled sex sexy… or does it kill the vibe?

In this episode, I’m breaking down one of the most common (and quietly controversial) topics that shows up in long-term relationships: putting sex on the calendar. Because when life gets full—kids, careers, stress, exhaustion—spontaneity doesn’t just disappear… it gets crowded out.

So what happens when you stop waiting to “feel in the mood” and start creating the conditions for desire instead?

We’re talking about:

• Why desire naturally shifts in long-term relationships (and why nothing is “wrong” with you)

• The myth that real desire should always be spontaneous

• How scheduling intimacy can actually increase anticipation, playfulness, and connection

• The difference between sex as a feeling vs. sex as a choice

• How to reduce pressure, performance anxiety, and the fear of obligation

• Why defining sex more broadly changes everything

• Common traps couples fall into (and how to avoid them)

• Practical ways to make scheduled intimacy feel intentional—not clinical

Because here’s the truth: scheduling sex isn’t about forcing desire… it’s about making space for it. And for many couples, that shift is everything.

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Want to take this deeper?

If this conversation is hitting home, my course the Pleasure Circle walks you step-by-step through understanding your desire, your patterns, and how to actually build a more connected, satisfying intimate life—without pressure or performance.

👉 Learn more and enroll here: Pleasure Circle

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