St. Isaac the Syrian is ruthless here because he is protecting us from despair on one side and fantasy on the other.

Most of us live precisely in the state he describes. We have repented. We have turned away from obvious sins. We pray. We read. We fast. And yet our prayer feels crowded. Memories intrude. Images multiply. The heart is pulled back into itself again and again. This is not a sign that repentance was false. It is the normal condition of an unfledged mind.

Isaac is teaching us not to panic when the mind cannot yet fly.

At this stage virtues are still heavy. They belong to effort. They restrain the mind but they do not yet lift it. We imagine that distraction means failure and that freedom should come quickly. Isaac says no. Freedom has an atmosphere. The mind must slowly learn the air in which it will one day remain. Until then it hops. And hopping is not sin. It is training.

The mistake is trying to force flight. When we strain to escape images we only multiply them. When we analyze distraction we deepen self consciousness. When we demand interior stillness before humility has done its work we turn prayer into a project. Isaac quietly refuses all of this. He tells us to remain faithful to outward obedience without expecting inward vision yet.

What overcomes these tendencies is not technique but endurance in smallness. We continue to pray even when prayer feels poor. We do not chase experiences. We accept that God is served through visible things for a long time. And we allow the Lord to teach us the inner meaning of what we already practice. Slowly virtues become transparent. They stop drawing attention to themselves. They begin to point beyond themselves.

Humility is the hinge. Not self accusation. Not interior commentary. Humility is staying low enough that God can lean toward us. The humble man does not try to send his prayer upward. He speaks it close. Like a word placed directly into the ear of God.

Lord You will enlighten my darkness.

This is what readers of Philokalia Ministries need to hold on to. If your prayer feels earthbound do not abandon it. If your mind is crowded do not fight it violently. If your virtues feel external do not despise them. You are not failing. You are growing feathers.

Flight comes later.

First comes patience.

---

Text of chat during the group:

00:06:24 Bob Čihák, AZ: P. 176, # 21, second paragraph

00:13:26 Bob Čihák, AZ: P. 176, # 21, second paragraph

00:15:11 Angela Bellamy: congratulations Father 😆

00:18:25 Jonathan Grobler: I think it's an amazing technology, it just needs to be used properly

00:31:19 Ryan Ngeve: Father how does watchfulness (nepsis) guard us against such thoughts and memories even when watchfulness seems futile

00:32:18 Jesssica Imanaka: I've heard about a lot of projections that happen in monasteries... Memory can be tricky because sometimes someone else inhabits the role of the prior, forgotten experience as when, for example father issues get projected onto the Abbot.

00:33:05 Anthony: It sounds like ascetic life is like having purgatory now. It is purgation. It is being "helpless.". The difference is that ascetic life is voluntary while a person is in this state of existence.

00:41:56 Angela Bellamy: Father, please forgive the digression, Are there resources from the Fathers that speak about holy, disciplined forms of mortification—clearly distinguished from self-punishment—especially for passions that don’t present themselves clearly in the mind? I’m thinking of struggles that are more hidden, where the passion is known more by its fruit than by an obvious thought, and where simple watchfulness doesn’t immediately reveal the root.

00:45:36 David Swiderski, WI: This makes me think of a quote from Meister Eckhart who I think is misunderstood as a mystic. Even though he is from the west some of his thoughts really align with the desert father-“The only thing that burns in hell is the part of you that won't let go of your life: your memories, your attachments. They burn them all away, but they're not punishing you, they're freeing your soul. If you're frightened of dying and you're holding on, you'll see devils tearing your life away. If you've made your peace, then the devils are really angels freeing you from the earth.”

00:47:46 Jessica McHale: a lot of people think Ash Wed is a holy day of obligation but it's not

00:50:22 Anthony: Is it appropriate now to talk about the difference between monks and friars? The Franciscan friars I met don't appear to have this intense psychological focus that monks have.

00:50:49 Anna: What book did he say?

00:51:19 Jessica McHale: Replying to "What book did he s..."

Philikalia....vol 1

00:52:42 Ben: Alphonse & Rachel Goetmann - The Prayer of Jesus?

00:53:02 John ‘Jack’: Reminds me of the recorded letter from one of GK Chesterton’s freinds (the priest who inspired Father Brown I believe) said to him “it’s about time you came in off the porch” in regards to Chesteton’s  conversion to the Catholic faith.

00:54:37 Larry Ruggiero: The Way of the Ascetics

00:54:52 David Swiderski, WI: A really good summary of the eight evil thoughts is St. Ephraim in the spiritual psalter #117 Life's Lessons-Eight Evil Thoughts small enough to carry with you.

00:55:00 Larry Ruggiero: By Tito Colliander

01:01:56 Angela Bellamy: Reacted to "StEphraimEightEvilThoughts.pdf" with 👍

01:02:03 Nypaver Clan: Father,  Where can one go in the Pittsburgh area for a vow of silence retreat? A place one can go for a weekend just to be “alone with God”?

01:02:06 Jesssica Imanaka: Replying to "A really good summar..."

I recently bought that book at my local Orthodox Monastery!

01:02:57 Maureen Cunningham: Berryville Va Holy Abbey is silent retreat

01:03:09 Anthony: Replying to "Father,  Where can o..." 

 Is there a Madonna House in Pittsburgh?

01:03:33 Maureen Cunningham: It was Saint Benedict order

01:06:31 Nypaver Clan: Reacted to "Berryville Va Holy A..." with ❤️

01:07:35 Mark South: the last sentence in paragragh 22 - would this be the secrete of watchfulness?

01:12:48 Sr Barbara Jean Mihalchick: Two other retreat places come to mind.  Each  one has a separate building where one can be more alone - St. Emma's Benedictine Sisters' Monastery in Greensburg and the Ark and the Dove near North Park in Pgh.

01:13:17 Nypaver Clan: Replying to "Two other retreat pl..."

Thank you, Sister!

01:13:29 Anthony: Miss June, same with me!

01:14:36 Jesssica Imanaka: Father, another digression, but would you consider doing a group on one of Archimandrite Zacharias Zacharou's books?

01:15:19 Elizabeth Richards: Reacted to "Father, another digr..." with ❤️

01:15:22 Anna: All of them 😂

01:15:28 Nypaver Clan: Reacted to "Father, another digr..." with 👍

01:15:45 Jessica McHale: yes!

01:15:50 Elizabeth Richards: This year???

01:15:53 Kate: Yes please!

01:15:58 Jesssica Imanaka: We need time to order those books from Essex.

01:16:47 David Swiderski, WI: Thank you Father may God bless you and your mother and your Dad on his birthday!

01:16:50 Rebecca Thérèse: Thank you☺️

01:16:56 John Burmeister: thanks

01:17:08 John ‘Jack’: Thank you Father.

01:17:12 Jesssica Imanaka: Thank you!

01:17:12 Joan Chakonas: The fastest hour of my day, again

01:17:17 Kevin Burke: Replying to "Two other retreat pl…"
Thank You Father! These sessions are so vital to my spiritual growth!

01:17:31 Janine: Thank you Father

01:17:34 Elizabeth Richards: Blessing- thank you!

01:17:38 Jessica McHale: thank you!