"Loved You, Hated You": Surviving Toxic Love, Losing Yourself & Choosing You | Nikki Allen

June 4
48 mins

Episode Description

What happens when you love someone so deeply that you lose yourself in the process — and then find the courage to transform that pain into art?

In this episode, I sit down with Nikki Allen — singer, songwriter, filmmaker, and author of Loved You, Hated You — a bold, emotionally charged novel born from a real toxic relationship, a song written to survive it, and years of "soul surgery" to heal from it.

We talk about:

💔 Why we stay in toxic relationships long after we know we should leave

🎭 The "six-month mask" — and why the anesthesia always wears off

🌱 What choosing yourself actually looks like in real life (not just as a concept)

🔥 How fear keeps us stuck — and what's waiting on the other side of it

✍️ Why fiction can tell truths that memoirs sometimes can't

🎬 The creative journey from heartbreak song → screenplay → novel

Nikki's story is raw, real, and deeply relatable — and her message is clear: self-love isn't selfish. It's the foundation everything else is built on.

🔗 Connect with Nikki: nikkiallen.com

📖 Loved You, Hated You — available now

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