In This Body

·S3 E47

Why People-Pleasing Isn’t Kindness: Healing The Fawn Response With Dr Ingrid Clayton

January 8
45 mins

Episode Description

In this episode of How To Be In This Body, we explore the fawn response as an adaptive survival strategy (not a character flaw) and trace a gentle path from self-abandonment back to self-contact. Dr. Ingrid Clayton, clinical psychologist and author, brings together clinical insight, lived experience, and practical tools for building internal safety and reducing shame.

Together, Ailey and Ingrid unpack how fawning develops, why danger can feel familiar, and how our bodies learn to prioritize connection over selfhood. This conversation offers compassion, language, and embodied understanding for anyone who has learned to appease in order to survive and who is ready to begin coming home to themselves.

In this episode:

  • 0:00 – Embodiment And Show Welcome
  • 1:47 – Meet Dr Ingrid Clayton
  • 8:16 – Agency, Validation And Reclaiming Story
  • 16:28 – The Missing Discourse On Fawning
  • 20:26 – Codependency Versus Trauma Response
  • 23:27 – How Fawning Feels In The Body
  • 28:34 – From Self-Abandonment To Self-Contact
  • 34:57 – Fawning In The Therapy Room 
  • 41:34 – Trust Your Body’s Unique Path
  • 44:27 – Everyday Practices For Regulation

You can read the transcript here

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