we've all been called a people pleaser, or called somebody else one. but most of us have never actually looked at what separates it from kindness, or from the thing underneath it. this week we're going three layers deep: kindness, people pleasing, and fawning, and how to tell which one you're actually doing. then we get into the why, and it's not always a bad childhood. it's school, work, culture, religion, one relationship that took two years to leave. and then we get into the mechanism, which is reinforcement and punishment, and the specific ways we got trained to be agreeable and trained out of being assertive at the same time. this one's for anybody who's ever been called the mom of the friend group.

we finish where we always do, with your ego, and why "i'm just a kind person" is so much easier to say than "i was hurt and it changed how i act." your care package is three small things. nothing that'll blow up your life. live with care 🤎