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Episode Description
In this episode Evie and Axel discuss sexual bucket lists, what they are, why people have them, and why so many people carry desires they have never articulated to anyone. The conversation was prompted by a booking where a client arrived with a list of specific things he wanted to experience, some of which Evie and Axel had been quietly working through themselves.
Axel reflects on realising he had been building a list for years without acknowledging it as one, and what it took to start acting on it. Evie looks at why clients come to her to have desires met that they can't bring to their partners, and what that says about how shame attaches itself to sexuality. This is part one of two, the second episode goes into the specific items on their lists.
TOPICS
- Why Axel had a sexual bucket list for years without recognising it as one, or believing he was allowed to have it
- What changed between hearing a particular inquiry from Evie a year ago and hearing the same thing yesterday
- Why bringing desires to a long-term partner can feel riskier than bringing them to a professional
- How some experiences turn out to be ice cream and others turn out to be coffee, and why you can't know which until you try
- Whether the desires that came from watching porn are actually yours, and how you would even tell the difference
- What it means that most people discover their desires mid-relationship rather than before it starts
QUOTES
- Evie: "Safety is the absolute foundation for being able to access my full range of desires."
- Axel: "The shame, the expectation, even if there was a small risk of that, the shame that I would feel having shared a desire and had it rebuked or ostracised, not worth it."
- Evie: "To access those parts of ourselves in a relationship, even when they feel really deep, really innate and really important to us, it can be impossible for some people to get past the fear."
- Axel: "The longer you wait, the harder it becomes. And there's more at stake."
- Evie: "Being able to open up sooner in order to know if you are aligned in your values and who you are as people is actually a really beneficial thing. But it's incredibly scary and most people won't step into that territory."
ABOUT
Evie Elysian and Axel Meridius are a real-life Melbourne couple who work together as escorts under the name Evie + Axel. Rawdog is their unfiltered take on sex, intimacy, and what they've learned from years in the adult industry.
This podcast contains explicit sexual content and is intended for adult audiences. Discretion is advised for sensitive listeners.
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