Mum inspected my socks, undies, shirts and anything else I wore for the slightest indication of a hole. I gave her every opportunity to be able to perform a daily inspection of my clothes because I’d drop whatever I was wearing when I was changing into my pyjamas onto the bedroom floor. It became part of her Tuesday night darning collection pile. After the dishes were washed in the sink and dried, mum sat at the kitchen table with the darning pile and her darning-sewing box. Her darning-sewing box was a MacRobertson's Old Gold Chocolate Box. Mum was a darning and knitting wizard. She knitted all my jumpers, cardigans, gloves, and anything I wore that was wool. Then came the fateful time when she knitted my school uniform jumper. I was a youthful adolescent entering the third form at an all-boys technical school. The jumper was a different stitch than the school jumpers bought at the shops and I became the subject of ridicule and mockery.

This episode is also available as a blog at drinkingwithflies.wordpress.com