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This week on 2 Bears, 1 Cave, Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer celebrate Por Osos landing in Publix just in time for the 4th of July, which sends Bert into a full nostalgic spiral about pub subs, boat days, and taking his daughters into "international waters." From there, things get historical, the bears break down the story of the guy who invented the meter and got guillotined for it, which leads them down a rabbit hole of people killed for their big ideas, the French Revolution as the original cancel culture, and Martin Luther versus the Catholic Church.
Then Bert tells stories about his relationship with the late Patrice O'Neal: getting destroyed at his first open mic, the Edinburgh trip where they lived together for 29 days watching Bruce Lee movies and Bert getting his feelings systematically demolished, and the moment he found out Patrice had tweeted something kind about him right before the stroke. Tom and Bert also spiral deep into funeral planning, who's required to show up, who gets a Sandler video instead of a live appearance, why Ari's funeral is going to involve hardcore Brooklyn relatives and a lot of confusion, the Andrew Schultz balloon clown apology Bert wants delivered posthumously, and whether or not to get cremated when science might figure something out. Plus: horror movies vs. comedy movies as investments, the film Obsession and its director Curry Baker, Bert's dad crashing the podcast mid-funeral conversation, the band Goose vs. the band Geese, and Mount Joy watching Passion of the Christ on the tour bus.

2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 331

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https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour
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Chapters
00:00:00 - Intro
00:02:21 - Por Osos in Publix & Florida Pub Sub Gospel
00:08:45 - The Daniel Boone Documentary
00:18:51 - The Guy Who Invented the Meter Got Killed for It
00:24:59 - People Executed for Big Ideas
00:33:46 - Patrice O'Neal Destroys Bert at His First Open Mic
00:41:27 - Showtime Special, Party Bus, & Patrice's Funeral
00:48:31 - Funerals Vs Celebration Of Life
00:57:00 - Nick Kroll, Andrew Schultz & the Balloon Clown Apology
01:04:11 - Bert's Dad Chimes In
01:05:54 - Noga Erez, Goose Vs. Geese & Mount Joy
01:09:02 - Curry Barker's Obsession & Horror vs. Comedy Movies
01:15:10 - Wrap

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